''The Shining Sun,'' a trick that most ponies have never survived from attempting the trick, other ponies pulled it off with dexterity, grace, and finesse. Scootaloo decides to show her big sister that she can do what she can do too, what better way to prove to your sibling that you are not afraid of danger.
She attempts and completes the trick, but it comes with a price, her beloved scooter. Will Scootaloo find a way to look past her scooter to realize what she can do or does the thought of flying comes to mind?
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic and their characters are property of Hasbro ©.
Note: Writing this story as a one-shot was intentional, I planned this story to be written as such.
This story was inspired by this song. The song is copyright property of BlackGryph0n. ©
Editor: JR Black Wing
Yay! Well, now that that is done...
What about a ButtonBelle story I have been hearing about? *wink wink, nudge nudge*
4634556 You'll be getting it, don't you worry!
Wonderful little story!
While the writing does seem rough cut, I like the little details that you added towards the end that made it fell all heartwarming with the letter from the "Mane 6."
Good job, overall!
- JR Black Wing
P.S. I would love to edit it
Nicely done. I especially liked the "Get Well" letter.
4634643 Thank you, JR!
I'm glad that you liked it, if you ever want to edit it, don't hesitate to tell me.
4635938 Thank you so much, glad you liked it!
4637536 Fantastic! I will give it a shot and see what happens!
4637566 What parts do you want to edit though?
nice little story, it could use some padding but overall well done.
4637645 Thanks! Someone offered to edit the beginning of the story, so it will get the padding to make it a bit better.
Personally, I think it could also use an epilogue where she attempts the trick again. (Crowd and success of the trick optional
)
4639829 Sorry to leave you hanging with that, but I hope you enjoyed it though.
4639833 Oh, indeed I did.
I love this story, I think it has a great lesson for kids. This story is officially %100 Beatrice approved.
Signed:
My OFFICIAL Stamp of aproval 
Keep up the good work.
Beatrice
4639864 I'm glad!
4639929 I will, Beatrice! I humbly accept your stamp of approval.
Glad you enjoyed it!
Wow... this story is nice!
Forgive me for not reading it sooner, like I'd promised, but here I am now.
Well, I did notice a few mistakes (
).
I'll point them out to you. This way, you can fix them and this story will then be PERFECT!!
I hope you don't mind.
Um... "shined" --> "shone"
Don't worry, I make that same mistake at times...
These sentences are a bit awkward...
"is trick" --> "is a trick"
The word "successfully" makes the first sentence a bit too redundant. I mean, "attempted" is there, and "not one pony has been able to pull it off" is there as well... Either remove the sentence "as told by legend...successfully" entirely, or try to rearrange the sentence in a way that successfully emulates suspense.
Also "which ranged from slight injury" is pretty standard, but "to not being able to recover from the fall"... um... that's kinda awkward...
How about "which ranged from slight injury to critical condition" or something?
Should be either "via" or "using", it can't be both. Personally, I'd get rid of "using" and keep "via".
Two mistakes in here: "I mean" should have a comma after it, so it's like "I mean, ..."
Lower-case "Time".
No problems here, it's the fact that this paragraph is written is present tense while the rest of the story is in past tense.
You can keep it.
I don't particularly mind it though.
This one is debatable, but it should be "farther and farther", not "further and further" - "further" relates to something else not related to distance, which "farther" is.
Well, "the potential energy of Scootaloo" seems awkward... replace it with "her potential energy".
And then... "trust"? You mean "thrust".
And another switch to present tense - "as she enters the apex" - , only this time it has to be changed.
Okay... perhaps consider: "She stuck her chest outward, her unkempt, purple mane glowing in the light of the yellow sun." and then make the second clause a new sentence. "The very thought of completing this trick unscathed as well as being able to tell Rainbow Dash about it made Scootaloo more excited than ever."
Whew....
Okay, that's enough pointing out of mistakes for now.... I'll probably come back and finish it but.... *sighs*....
I hope you appreciate what I've done so far!
Pointing out of mistakes aside, I enjoyed this one-shot very much and I'm glad to have read it.
4643088 Thank you, I'll be sure to fix the mistakes!
4643115 No problem!
Also, I updated Chapter Four of my story.
4643128 I'll be sure to check it out.
4643156 Thank you!
And review/comment as well! I won't bite.
4643165 Oh wait, I read Chapter Four already.
4643168 Yeah, but I added a few scenes onto it!
4643170 Well played, I'll look at the new scenes.
Somehow in this story, I have a problem with keeping my present/past tenses consistent.
4643180 Thanks!
And, I have no idea either.... some places it's nice... but other times it's not good...
You'll fix it.. so don't worry.
4643190 I fixed it in this story, thanks to you.
I just hope I don't make the same mistake in my next story.
4643201 No problem!
And I hope you don't make the same mistake as well!
)
(Even though I'm among those who don't mind if a whole paragraph has a tense change while the rest don't. It's a problem, however, if the tense change occurs in a single sentence... also I don't really get why it sometimes is applied to dialogue tags and overall dialogue as well...
Oh, well, guess that was just a one-time ordeal...
4643217 Those are the rules, I guess.
4643222 Well, screw the rules, I have a pen!
But, dialogue tags? seriously?
4643227 I don't make the rules, the man does!
4643232
lol! 
Yeah! and sometimes, we can break those rules!
4643236 Indeed.
4643244
)
(Don't forget to comment when you read my story! That'll help me a lot!
4643252 I'll try to. We should collaborate on a story sometime.
4643254 Okay.
Oh, that [collaborating] would be fun!
Whatcha think? or whatme think?
4643261 I think it would be fun.
4643268 Me too!
So.....?
4643271 Let me guess, need an idea on the story that we should collaborate on?
4643274 Yeah, I guess...
Though it should include Kirby.
Not a lot of stories here have Kirby in them...
4643285 Well, we could try.
4643298 Yeah, we could definitely try!
4643300 Eeyup.
4643306 Eeyup...
4643310 I guess you have to continue your Kirby story now, huh?
4643319 Yeah.... still lots of continues!
But the show shall go on~
My Recent Blog Post
Yeah, as that says, I've been stuck in a writing rut for a while before I thought up those scenes...
but it could go over... 
)
So, yeah, it's got a LOT more to go before it's finished... (if I could guess, I'd say about 20-23 chapters or so...
(That and I'm considering entering the story to the Royal Guard and talked to Obe about it too...)
4643333 You can do it!
4643357 .....
)! 
Yeah....
Yeah!!!
I'm gonna be that little Train who Could (?
I'm gonna be that catalyst!
I'm gonna finish this story!
....although it may take long...
I'm not gonna push myself either....
4643379 Take it slow and be cool, that's my mantra.
4643407 And I like your mantra.
*adopts among other mantras*
Quality over quantity is what I always say!
4643413 Exactly, take those mantras to the heart.
All you have to do is BO-LIEVE!