• Member Since 7th May, 2014
  • offline last seen Aug 14th, 2014

Maddielittle1998


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First ever story about twilight and celestia.
Twilight gets her heart broken because Celestia refuses to attend the gala with her. This was done for a prompt collab with the Twilestia is bestia group.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 19 )

Aahh, another Twilestia fic, always nice ^^

There are a few grammatical errors. I only noticed this once, but, it's a very common thing "Your" and "You're" There are differences, which I'm sure you're aware of ^^

Also, when you say "i love you" or something like that, you have to capitalize the I. Also a thing I noticed once.

There are not many other mistakes, so, all in all, nice fic ^^

Although, one thing I didn't get. It's Celestia and Twilight, it's not the ship I disapprove of, it's just that, shouldn't the ponies respect their princess no matter what and who she was into? She has the power to banish them all, and that should be enough to respect her in such cases. :)

Oh, yeah. One more thing I forgot to mention. When you're talking about something that belongs to someone, like it belongs to Twilight, you should write it, like "Twilight's feelings."

Always apostrophe "s" ^^

I'm going to be trampled by dislikes

4389039 oh yeah thanks for the advice and yeah I did think about that. But I wanted to try a little meaner twilight. I mean, she has been dating the princess for a couple of weeks and her heart just got broken so she was upset

4389093 A few minor points really.
When someone makes a statement enclosed with quotation marks ("), there should be no space around it, such as:
"I was just trying to do the right thing..." instead of " I was just trying to do the right thing..."
It makes it easier to read.
And the last part after "So, feel free..." should be moved down to the comments section as it's not really part of the story.
I liked the plot, though, so thumbs up there. Hope that somehow the two of them will work out their differences even though there is the 'Sad' tag on it.

4389222 oh thank you for the helpful pointers here :scootangel: it is much appreciated. Also, maybe there will be a sequel:ajsmug:

Not bad. Just some small mistakes with capital letters and some apostrophes, as well as the text format. There were parts I couldn`t notice a paragraph change, but other than that, it was a nice story, you could continue it.

4390023 thanks! I will think about it:)

4389079
why? I think Taylor Swift is a very cute girl that sings well enough

Celestia is being a dummy right now, she knows how fragile Twilight confidence is, she should know better than shatter it like that :fluttercry:

4391465 I know what is wrong with this author? My goodness! We should write hate mail

Really good so far can't wait for chapter 2! :yay::yay::yay:

4392040 oh idk if I'm making a chapter two. It was supposed to end there:rainbowderp: maybe though... Maybe

well that was rushed but still good.
this needs to continue.
and you do know there's a authors box right?

4392986 oh yes I forgot to use it. And um, it was supposed to be a short story for a prompt collab I was working on I have no idea if I'm making a sequel

Please put more spaces between the paragraphs. This is uncomfortable to read.

I think Twilight isn't looking at the big picture here. On an individual level, the opinions of others don't matter, and it's good to show that you aren't ashamed of who you are. On the national? Well, that very much depends on just what the level of anti-gay sentiments are in the world. If there are any particularly radical nations, this could cut cut into international relations; reduce exports/imports, heighten tariffs, and depending on the degree of the sentiment it could very well put Equestrians abroad in the nation in danger.

Being openly known as "the kingdom with the gay princesses" is going to have a negative effect on interactions with other nations even if they aren't as extreme as the above; ordinary prejudice comes into play. People attribute perceived properties of a nation or race onto every individual of that people or race--in this case, a lot of completely unrelated ponies will find themselves treated worse than they otherwise would have.

It ceases to be a matter of shame, pride, fear, embarrassment, or even personal feelings at all, but one of national interest. Celestia's already shown that she will do anything for the sake of Equestria.

Yes, famous people leaving the closet is an important part of striking down prejudice against homosexuality, but if this is at the earlier stages of erasing the prejudice then it is very dangerous--for Equestria's sake (but also their own)--to come out now. They aren't just famous, but in charge of the nation. Ponies acting against them will be acting against Equestria--and if they punish everypony, regardless of how deserved it may be, they'll develop a reputation as tyrants for striking down anypony who opposed their rule (that isn't what they did, but it's the way it'll be spun). Twilight Sparkle would probably take most of the flak for that--it would be her fault Celestia became so cruel, and she probably turned her gay too (everypony knows she's good at magic! She could totally curse the princess!)

Of course, if it's just the nobles that are stuck up about it or neighboring nations are fairly accepting of this, then yeah, Celestia's being a coward. Or her mind is stuck thinking two centuries back.

6115208 there is an easier to read version in the twilestia prompt collab chapter 160 same title

6115208 Tell those countries they're stupid and cut off relations with them.

7776396 That could be a quick way to start a war.

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