“This is all so very unseemly.” Rarity whined. “It keeps slapping up and down against my belly as we walk. This isn’t very ladylike.”
Twilight scowled.
“And there are little dribbles of some kind of sticky goo as it slaps up against me. I can feel my pelt becoming soiled and icky.” Rarity cried, her voice now hitching from her state of panic. “And mares. Mares all around me. I can smell them!”
“Rarity, please! We’re all having this problem!” Twilight Sparkle snapped.
“My belly hairs are so soft.” Pinkie Pie commented, squirming, causing herself to rub certain parts of her anatomy together.
“Pinkie Pie, stop arming your party cannon!” Twilight Sparkle commanded.
“This cannot possibly be what stallions go through every day. They make it look so easy.” Rarity whined, her words grating on the last nerve Twilight had left.
“Is it wrong that I can’t stop thinkin’ about my brother’s teats?” Applejack inquired.
“Yeah Applejack, that’s uh, not good.” Twilight said. “Perhaps now is not the time to be honest.”
“Just so big and bouncy. Like two plump dangling apples…”
“UUUUUUUUUUUUGH!” Twilight Sparkle grunted.
“We’re close now, I can hear the screams.” Rarity said, fear edging into her voice. The group rounded the corner and into the marketplace, meaty slapping sounds coming from beneath them as they trotted along, Rarity on the verge of hyperventilating.
Before them lay bedlam. Fluttershy stood close to a stall, a mare backed into the corner cowering from her.
“That’s the jerk that cheated Fluttershy on tomato prices!” Rarity warned.
“Lookin’ like he’s about to go into the cherry business.” Applejack drawled.
“Applejack!” Twilight protested.
“Just sayin’!” Applejack replied.
“Oh, I can’t watch!” Pinkie Pie said. “Not without touching my party cannon.”
Two parts of Twilight Sparkle’s anatomy throbbed in unison. “Hold it together girls. We don’t want to see any pony get hurt.”
Twilight’s companions nodded.
“Applejack, go get her.” Twilight urged.
Applejack rushed forward with her lasso, roping the frisky yellow pegasus. The tomato seller took the opportunity to run. Applejack began to run around in a circle, tangling Fluttershy up in the rope, coiling it around her legs.
“I’m so sorry, I can’t help it!” Fluttershy cried. “But I have needs!” She kicked outward, snapping the rope into several shorter pieces. Applejack looked on in horror as Fluttershy took to the air and flew away. Fluttershy had broken the rope as though it was twine.
A brown mare emerged from behind a stall. “Is he gone?” She asked.
“You’re safe.” Pinkie chirped.
The brown mare eyed them warily. “This regeneration has gone not as planned. I don’t remember dying.” Twilight Sparkle felt even more confusion.
“Time Turner?” Twilight asked.
The mare nodded.
“Do you know anything?” Twilight queried.
“No. I am just as confused as you.” Time Turner said. “But something is clearly wrong. I need to get back to my clock shop.” The brown mare departed, cautiously working her way down the lane.
Dinky Doo Hooves trotted down the road, making her way to the library. She had heard other foals were there, Rumble and the Crusaders. The whole town had gone mad. And something was terribly wrong with Dinky. She was still cute, still adorable, but there was something wrong. She hoped that Twilight could fix whatever it was that was wrong.
And there was something wrong. So terribly wrong. Dinky had sprouted another horn. And mommy had flown out the window, muttering strangely and shaking badly. Twilight was a good pony and Dinky knew she could trust Twilight for help.
Shining Armor awoke, yawning, and stretching out. He froze. Something seemed wrong. Cadance was pressed against his back. She was breathing heavily. And there was something, something pressing up against him, it started off with a soft pillowy something down near his dock and something long and hard that traveled halfway up his back. He felt a cold prickle of fear travel through his body.
And there was something missing. Something missing from his own body. Something vitally important. He swallowed a few times.
“Ooh Shiny… I like hearing you swallow.” Cadance said in husky tones. “Shiny, honey bee, I have a problem.” Shining felt a cold chill flash through his new anatomy.
“I have those problems too. Had…” Shining Armor trailed off. “And you always told me to go take a cold shower or learn how to control myself. You said there was too much to do in the mornings.”
Cadance’s breathing became heavier. “I was a fool Shining. I didn’t understand. I was wrong.”
Shining felt Cadance’s hips flex, and something rubbed along his back. “Mornings Cadance!” Shining squeaked, “Think of the morning schedule!”
“Oh, I am. I need to schedule a little personal time with you.” Cadance cooed. “And right now, I want to wear you like a sock.”
“Cadance! You are not yourself!” Shining said.
“Oh but I am Shiny. I am the Goddess of Love. And I have needs. Love me Shiny.” Cadance pleaded. “I’ll be tender and gentle, I promise.”
Shining Armor could feel Cadance’s heavy breathing on his ears. Suddenly, he was very, very aroused himself. “Cadance, are you using your magic on me?”
“No.” Cadance purred. “And while I am very concerned about what is going wrong, I have other, more pressing needs.” To illustrate her point, Cadance pressed her need up against Shining and rubbed him a few times.
Shining started to roll over, but Cadance stopped him. “No Shiny, like this. From behind. All lovey spoony.” Cadance whispered in velvet tones. Shining felt two legs pull him close.
Shining Armor began to titter nervously like a school filly as Cadance pressed her nose into his neck, pressing little kisses along the sides of his mane, planting little nips behind his ears.
“You busted my filly ribbon and now, turnabout is fair play.” Cadance growled, pulling even tighter, her movements now becoming jerky and frantic.
Twilight Sparkle pushed her way into the hardware store, looking around. “We need chains.” Twilight said, looking at the back wall. “Those chains. Used for securing wagons and plows.”
Applejack nodded.
“Are you sure this is necessary?” Rarity inquired. “Seems cruel to chain up Fluttershy.”
“And kinda kinky.” Pinkie Pie added.
“She broke the rope.” Twilight Sparkle reasoned.
“That she did.” Rarity replied. “I can’t believe sweet innocent Fluttershy is behaving this way.” Rarity paused, thinking about her words. “Wait, I can. I know her better than anypony. Twilight, dear, we must hurry.”
“Fluttershy doesn’t always deal with pressure very well. I can’t imagine what this is doing to her.” Applejack said. “I can’t believe what this is doing to me right now. I could plow a field with this thing.”
“I don’t know how stallions manage to leave the house.” Pinkie said. “Or how they make these things behave. I don’t know if I’ll ever feel safe when I turn back into a mare. Every mare I meet smells so good. Like fresh baked goods.”
“If you ever turn back into a mare.” Twilight deadpanned.
“No!” Pinkie cried. “I like being a mare. The party cannon is fun, but it is big and dangly and gets in the way. My filly bits were much more convenient.”
“It is really awful. All covered in veins and stretched out looking skin. And it points at everything. ‘Tis rude to point!” Rarity complained.
Twilight hefted the chains and padlocks in her magic, carefully coiling them around, making sure they didn’t tangle, so they would be ready to use at a moment’s notice.
“I feel like I would feel so much better if I could just jam this thing inside of something and make the tension go away. I saw a watermelon in the market. A watermelon I tells ya, and I all I could think about was jamming this thing inside of it.” Applejack confessed.
Pinkie Pie bit her lip and nodded. “I saw the same watermelon.”
“Just imagine that watermelon between the two of us. I’d thrust forward, and then you’d thrust it back at me…”
“APPLEJACK!” Twilight shouted. “Focus!”
“I can’t Twi. I have me a powerful need.” Applejack groaned. “I feel backed up. Like I have to go drop a load of horseapples. I ain’t gonna survive this.”
“Somehow stallions manage to make it through each day!” Twilight snapped.
“But I ain’t a stallion! I ain’t had a lifetime of learnin’ how to hold back. This is torture Twi’, torture! And I don’t know how much more I can take. I ain’t ever gonna take my brother for granted over again.”
“Soarin’?” Rainbow pleaded. “Let me in! I promise I just want to talk! I want to come inside Soarin’!”
“No!” Soarin’ said on the other side of the door.
Rainbow Dash sat dejectedly on the stoop of Soarin’s cloud home. “Soarin’, please, I made a mistake. I just want to talk.”
‘I’m listening.” Soarin’ said.
Rainbow sighed. “I think I understand you position a little bit better now Soarin’.”
“I doubt it.” Soarin’ replied.
“No, really, I do. Playing hard to get must have been torture to you. I have a big problem Soarin’.” Rainbow confided.
“How big?” Soarin’ said distractedly. “Wait, never mind. You took every chance you could to lead me on and then leave me hanging.”
“Well, now, you’re a mare. Do you have any perspectives from my point of view?” Rainbow said.
“No.” Soarin’ replied.
“There is fine fine line you have to walk.” Rainbow explained. “You can’t be too eager.”
“Well good, no reason to let you in then.” Soarin’ answered.
“Look Soarin’, I am afraid of being tied down. I don’t know which way I swing yet. I like you. I really do. But I also like mares I think.” Rainbow said, slumping up against the archway.
There was a click from the door. Rainbow stared at the door, blinking.
“Since you are being honest, come in, we’ll talk.” Soarin’ said from the other side of the door.
Rainbow pushed the door open and went inside.
“I must restrain this urge to stroke, did I step in poison joke?”
Zecora was not having a good morning. Something was very, very wrong.
“I cannot believe I am so sprung, for a stallion I am quite well hung.”
Zecora dared a second look, peeking down between her front legs. Something peeked back at her.
“By the sun up in the sky, something is peeking with one little eye!”
She pranced in a circle around the inside of her hut.
She stared at her front door. “I am compelled to go off and rut. I must find a mare and bust a nut.” Zecora said, setting off for Ponyville.
All around her in the Everfree, Zecora could sense something was horribly wrong.
“This could be a world ender. Something has swapped every gender!”
“Snips?”
“Yeah Snails?”
“Do you think I’m pretty?”
“Don’t ask me that Snips!”
“Are we Sugar and Spice now?”
“SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP!”
Trixie Lulamoon surveyed Ponyville. She had arrived last night. She had awoke in her wagon this morning and discovered something different. Something very different.
The whole town was different.
Trixie was out strutting her stuff, a firm believer in “if you’ve got it, flaunt it.”
Trixie felt a rush of adrenaline when she saw a certain lavender alicorn approaching.
“The Great and Well Endowed Trixie says hello Twilight Sparkle!” Trixie crowed.
Twilight stood frozen, flabbergasted.
“Trixie, nopony likes a show off.” Applejack gulped.
“Does Trixie’s magic wand frighten you?!” Trixie exclaimed.
“A little.” Applejack said honestly.
“Mwahahahahah!” Trixie cackled.
“Oh shut up Trixie Lulamoon!” Rarity snapped, “We have bigger problems to deal with.”
“Bigger than Trixie?” Trixie said in disbelief.
“Yes.” Twilight said, feeling somewhat insecure.
“Trixie is feeling generous. Trixie will help you.” Trixie looked incredibly smug.
“Actually, I think we could use your help Trixie. We have to go chain up Fluttershy. She’s rampaging through the town, scaring the mares. I hope she hasn’t caught anypony yet.” Twilight said.
“Chain up Fluttershy?” Trixie stammered. “The shy harmless butterfly plot pony?”
“Yeah, that one. Something is wrong.” Twilight said. “Still have that rope spell? Can you use a chain?”
Trixie nodded.
“Good. Thank you Trixie.” Twilight said.
“You… er, uh, you are welcome Twilight Sparkle?” Trixie said, now somewhat confused.
“I have a plan. But I need the bravest, strongest, most bestest pony ever.” Twilight said.
“Trixie is here!” Trixie boasted.
“Good! I am going to turn you back into a mare if I can, or at least make you look like and smell like a mare if turning you doesn’t work. And then I am going to use you as bait.”
“Wait, Trixie is unsure of this course of action.”
“I’m sorry, I thought I was dealing with a great and powerful pony. I’ll guess I’ll keep looking.” Twilight sighed, disappointed.
“Wait, Trixie can do this!” Trixie cried.
“All hail the great and powerful Trixie.” Twilight said in cunning tones.
I...hope this updates more! But I think all the mares are sickening. I mean they should respecting the stallions for their endurance and now they're molesting them? Only Twilight and RD are thinking straight. Of course there are instincts, but I think everything's going to far too fast I mean last chapter, with cheerilee and the birds and the bees?
4243310
Remember... Discord is responsible. Nopony is currently behaving correctly.
This is hilarious. You must update more.
4243313
You...are correct. May the golden sunglasses illuminate this story's path.
Haiku of the nestled grove:
Scent of a female
Peering into forever
Spearing clouds and rain
♥•♥•♥•♥•♥•♥
Gender bent, without a lifetime of coping 'training'.
Lord above, this is officially the funniest thing I have ever read. I must have more. More I say!
The Fuck? It's not that season yet, because I am sure that they have a calendar marked for that And Eris is suppose to be feeling the blunt of it now that there are WAY more males now.
4243709
Season has nothing to do with this. More like magic gone bad. All will be explained, be patient.
4243719
I hope for an ending where the males get some well deserved sorry and appreciation,
Clearly, Big Mac turns into the top female. Shining Armor needs some return appreciation from his wife After the whole fiasco, Celestia needs to at least consider more mares in the Guard... oh dear lord! Luna is having a Wet dream!?!
Discord, he needs to be raped.
I'll come with you to hell!
My first time seeing r63 Discord. And the first time seeing browser ponies. XD
THIS IS GENIUS!!!
My god. Why do I want to read more of this?
4243310 They're acting like it because us guys are used to it, I mean every guy gets those urges after the age of around 11 to 16, girls don't, this is why we slowly go through puberty, because we aren't prepared for an being child to man within a day like most animals, I mean look at dogs, they can satisfy themselves with a couch!! We get used to it because our balls produce testosterone in smaller amounts when we're young, girls don't produce testosterone, It's like getting a shot of adrenaline. They aren't prepared and go into a lust high or basically a stallions version of heat.
I can't go to pony hell as I am already there.
4243719
I'm sorry posting this late my computer was down. Here some characters I would like to see get Gender bent:
More of Zecora.:
s29.postimg.org/bk7qb62vb/image.png
Lyra and Bonbon:
s10.postimg.org/ybz1nvk55/image.png
King Sombra, I can see that now Sombra decide to make a return that wrong time just imagine Sombra's armor chafing on her/his mare parts:
derpicdn.net/img/view/2012/11/19/157127__safe_rule+63_king+sombra_artist-colon-jaquelindreamz_queen+umbra.png
Nightmare Moon as separate character from Luna.
Gilda, I can imagine her/him Raindow Dash.
Fleur Dis Lee
Seabreeze
Queen Chrysalis
Screwball
Garble and the other teenage dragons just imagine them with big boobs.:
derpicdn.net/img/view/2013/7/10/369463__safe_sketch_rule+63_teenaged+dragon_garble_artist-colon-klondike_clump_garbledina_gronkle.png
s14.postimg.org/fd4kooofl/image.png
For the uncrop version of this pic try reverse search image the pic in images google you will find the uncrop version.
Iron Will, Like the pic but without the shirt just imagine Iron Will with His/her big boobs swinging around without any support while walking around in public.:
derpicdn.net/img/view/2013/4/10/293301__safe_rule+63_iron+will_artist-colon-riquis101_iron+heart.png
Derpy Hooves
EDIT: Spike, I wonder what would happen to Spike if s/he become greedy like in the episode "Secret of My Excess". I can imagine Spike looking like Godzilla but with giants boobs.
EDIT: More of Princess Cadence.
I can see Eris losing control to his/her girl urges if that happen talk about a plan backfiring.
Oh I am going to love this
I am from pony hell so it don't matter to me. One of the advantages to being a soul reaper.
4244850
Aren't double standards delightful and riotous?
I want Twist to have a dick so big that she can't walk. Her stubby child legs would be too short.
Where's Eris in all of this...
4243875
It's okay. You're not alone.
I want more too
Man, loved the inenuendo in the last chapter, but I have to post it here for people to actually see.
I have a big problem.
I have a bigger problem.
(pretend it is a proud look) : And I have the biggest!
4245522
Earth ponies. Daaayum!
bit.ly/1meVisz
Yes. It's weird, but I like it! IT REMINDS ME OF THE HUNT!
I somehow managed to like this story three times
*glares at the main cast*
At least your species has a f*ckin' sheathe to go with it!
4245530
True dat.
Although unicorns might have temporary you-know-what growth spells.
...In which case, I'd go to one who knew that spell.
Please please please make Derpy buck the Doctor in the clock shop I beg of you!!!! And thanks for making RD Bi! She's is definitely like me now.
That right there has to be the best one in the whole story man. I totally gotta use that one! I mean pfft Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
Enjoying this for now. *Clicks fav* Yep, I'm definitely going to watch this for a while.
4246340
Am I missing something, both sentences look identical...
I'll gladly go to Pony Hell with you if you continue this!! It's just too funny!!
Pony hell? I've heard it's lovely this time of the year!
4244928 in that cloud with discord
While reading I was listing to the lazy song
Straight to hell.
Laughing the whole way.
....What the fuck am I reading...?
“Does Trixie’s magic wand frighten you?!”
My sides, they have achieved orbit.
4246922 hey! wait for me!
Well it's interesting but the more I read the less I care for it. I mean a story made up of dick jokes really isn't a story, and the story doesn't have strong coherency. It goes off on too many tangents.
Wait, why not?
4247107 Comedy is A great and powerful soul..but at the center of its beauty, lies a dark hole filled with dicks.
I (think I) am scared and almost crying... I definitely don't like that Author's note...
Nopony hate me, please... May be everypony else can take it, but may be I can't.... (?)
4246209 Yes.... but does it not bother you some kind of way?
Going to pony hell you say? Sorry I can't be there, I'm already in social and dog hell, and I'm booked for human hell as well as Hades.
Still gonna be here yelling at Applejack to shut up though.
let me guess discord - i mean Eris, did this to teach them a lesson because they said that "slallions don't understand what mares go through", also because they clearely didn't understand that two girls kissing like that is still gay.
this story amuses me....but at the same time terrifies me
I read this even against my instincts, which were telling me that this would give me one major migraine, and my instincts were wrong. This fic gave me one major mind fuck.