67w, 5dMacDash fiction
AN:I do not own My Little Pony.
A MLP:FiM fanfiction
As the four plodded along, a rainbow blur came zipping up beside them.
“Hey there Big Mac! I heard from Applejack you just had a doctor appointment today. How'd that go?”
“Not real well, Ah guess. Doc didn't know any more than he did before, just told me 'take it easy' is all,” Big Mac said to the pegasus orbiting him.
“That sucks! Well, I've gotta fly, somepony's managed to make a huge mess in Ponyville and they need me to whip up a huge storm to clean it all up! By the way, did you know you're being followed by mud golems? They've been known to cause things like flooding and muddy streets you know. Kinda like what just happened to Ponyville, now that I think of it...”
Rainbow dash leered suspiciously at the three fillies.
The three muddy fillies, who were already being surprisingly quiet, stopped all motion altogether. But not even a thick layer of mud could conceal their guilty aura as they realized that Dash had pegged them as the instigators.
“We're sorry Rainbow Dash, we didn't realize it would be such a problem!” Cried Scootaloo, who appeared to be devastated at the prospect of inconveniencing her idol.
“Ah'm sorry too Rainbow. We just wanted to have a little fun is all.”
“Yeah. But now we're more covered in mud than my sister gets at the spa, and we didn't get our kayaking cutie-marks either.”
Rainbow dash laughed, her crackly tones brightening the atmosphere.
“Chill out squirts! The storm I'm gonna make'll clean it up in ten seconds flat.”
She stopped briefly to consider these words, then amended herself.
“Well, probably a little longer than that, wouldn't want to get rid of Ponyville as well as the mud. Just don't do it again, at least not in town anyway. But before I go,” Rainbow dash grabbed a small cloud, and swiftly dumped its payload of water on the crusaders. “There. And Big Mac, since the Doc can't give you any help, I guess you're stuck with mine! I'll meet you on the farm after I finish the storm.”
Without giving him a chance to protest, Rainbow dash flew off, leaving him and three sparkling crusaders behind.
As he stared after the pegasus with a smile, he realized that he wouldn't have really wanted to protest, anyway.
Sweetie Belle noticed his lingering gaze, and fixed him with a stare. It reminded him of a turn of phrase he had heard applied to himself at times. Still waters ran deep indeed, and Big Mac could literally see the conclusions forming in her mind.
“Awww, how sweet!” She giggled. “Big Mac likes Rainbow Dash!”
Fortunately for Big Mac, they were already out of town and out of Rainbow's earshot when Sweetie Belle made this declaration.
Scootaloo looked at him in horror, and Apple Bloom looked just as gleeful as Sweetie did.
Big Macintosh may have been a still water kind of pony like Sweetie Belle, but years of experience had given him the ability to speak quickly when necessary, and this was one instance where he thanked the Sisters for it.
“Now Miss Belle, it's not good ta go speculatin' like that. Whether or not that's true don't matter, it's just not polite to do so. Hasn't yer sister ever said anythin' like that?”
“Yeah. A couple times.”
“But is it true?” Inquired Apple Bloom, stars in her eyes. Big Macintosh rolled his eyes. So much for her learning tact.
At this point, Scootaloo had progressed to making exaggerated retching noises at the side of the pathway, before she gave a loud scream.
It seemed the bush that Scootaloo had chosen to give her performance at was still inhabited by the wonky-eyed pegasus.
Big Mac wanted to facehoof. It was just one thing after another today, wasn't it? Pressing his memory, he finally put a name to the mare- Ditzy Doo, a mailmare.
He approached the mare with an honest farmer's grin to cover up his nervousness.
“Howdy Miss Doo. Ah take it you overheard that whole thing?”
The mare nodded, eyes whirling in a hypnotic spiral.
“Then can Ah appeal to ya for some, um, discretion?”
The mailmare gave a pretty tinkling laugh, and spoke in a melodious voice.
“A secret would usually cost a kiss from such a handsome stallion as yourself, Mr. Macintosh. I will however make an exception in your case, for you seem to be a true gentlecolt, and I have no wish to add to your mare troubles.”
Big Macintosh blushed at the compliments as the crusaders stared wide-eyed at the fascinating conversation going on before them.
“Thank you very much Miss Doo. But, if ya don't mind mah askin', just what were ya doin' hidin' in the bushes?
“I enjoy hiding in hard to find places, and observing all of the different reactions of the ponies that stumble upon me.”
She leaned in conspiratorially.
“The eyes always get the ponies. It's a hobby, or perhaps habit, that I picked up as a young foal. There is a very long story involved, but I eventually received my cutie-mark as a result.”
“Do you think you could teach us? The eye-thing or hiding?” Blurted Scootaloo, seeing a dual opportunity to irrevocably change the subject from 'mushy stuff' and have a chance at a cutie-mark.
Ditzy laughed again, and the crusaders all looked on hopefully.
“Of course! But some other time, I'm afraid. I'm having tea with my good friend Carrot Top, and I need to stop at sugar-cube corner to pick up some snacks. Go with the Sisters, my friends!”
With that, her eyes swirled around thrice, and she took off, flying in great loops and zig-zags, resembling nothing other than a large grey-blue bumblebee buzzing about in search of flowers.
The crusaders buzzed off towards their clubhouse in a similar imitation the moment they arrived back at Sweet Apple Acres, leaving Big Mac to await his rainbow conundrum.
Big Mac was sitting on the front porch waiting for less than an hour before Rainbow Dash returned from Ponyville.
“Hey again Big Mac!”
“Hey yourself, Miss Dash.”
“Don't call me Miss Dash, okay? Just call me Rainbow, or Dash.”
“Heh, okay Rainbow. How was the town when you left?”
“Squeaky clean! The mayor came out to thank me herself. Yeah, I'm awesome.”
The two of them glared at each other, before breaking out in laughter. For Big Mac though, it turned out to be somewhat less than pleasant, as the shaking of his frame began to aggravate his sides once more.
He gave an involuntary groan, and Rainbow had flitted over to his side in an instant.
“Not feeling so hot, are you big guy?”
“Nothing for it then. On the ground with you!”
This time, Big Mac happily complied. Once again, the divine sensations from her hooves released all of his tension, as the breeze rippled and caressed his mane. And once again, he fell asleep.
When he awoke, he found himself in his bedroom, with the sun streaming in the window. A note lay beside him.
You're no fun, you know that? One little massage, and ZONK! Out like a light in ten seconds flat. I resisted the urge to use the markers this time, but I'm giving you fair warning. Also, lose some weight, tubby. Do you know how hard it was to get you to your bedroom? :P
Big Macintosh smiled.
Applejack had gotten up bright and early to go to town and sell apples in the marketplace. Ostensibly, at any rate. Her real motive, though became apparent at around lunchtime, when a purple pony began to peruse the stalls for produce.
“Hey there Twilight,” said Applejack. “I've got a favor to ask ya.”
Twilight smiled back at her.
“Fire away, Applejack!” said Twilight.
“Ya know how my brother's been doin' lately. I got to thinkin' couldn't ya find some spell, somethin' to fix his sides, I bet it'd be foal stuff to you with your experience,” said Applejack.
Twilight's smile had frozen on her face.
“I'm sorry, what was that?” Twilight said with a rather strained voice.
“With all yer book smarts, Ah bet ya can do somethin fer mah brother. Heh, and like Ah said, Ah bet fixin' somepony's innards with a spell would be foal's play for somepony who was able ta turn her parents into potted plants for Celestia's sake—what are you looking at me like that for?”
Twilight's frozen smile had melted into an expression of indignant, righteous rage.
She took two steps forward and slapped Applejack across the face. The sound echoed across the town square and everypony turned to watch the spectacle.
“That was an accident! I'll thank you not to imply that again Applejack. I don't care what you've heard. I. Am. Not. A. Biomancer!” Twilight shouted before storming off in the direction of the Ponyville library.
With that, all of the unicorns in the town square started glaring at her, as if she had committed some great sin. The rest of the ponies were split between sharing her confusion and glaring at her as well.
“Well, Horseapples,” swore Applejack.
She stood there, scowling to herself in confusion for a few moments before she heard somepony behind her.
“Have you ponies no shame? This has just been a misunderstanding between two dear friends, so go about your business! Go on!” Rarity said while making a few shooing gestures to go along with her timely lecture.
The crowd shuffled uncomfortably for a moment, before resuming whatever they had been doing before the drama that had unfolded in front of them.
Rarity turned to Applejack, and spoke quietly. “Come over to the boutique, darling, and we'll discuss what happened over tea.”
“No buts, dear. Come along now.”
Rarity started prodding at Applejack with her horn, and the farm pony finally gave in to said irresistible force.
Before long, Applejack found herself sitting in front of a table with a steaming mug of tea in front of her. Any attempt at conversation was quickly tut-tutted and hushed, and in resignation she rested her head glumly on the table.
Rarity finished bringing snacks to the table.
Applejack eyed one of the cucumber sandwiches, and snagged it off the tray with her mouth. Her unicorn host looked slightly perturbed at this, but seemed to push it aside as she sat down at the table herself.
“Now then, Applejack. I do believe you have a few questions?”
Applejack gave her a half-lidded stare.
“Err... Quite. I imagine you are wondering about our friend Twilight's reaction to your inquiry?”
“If'n ya mean why she an' every other unicorn in Ponyville's gone plumb loco, then yes, Ah do believe Ah am wonderin' about that.”
“None of them have gone 'plum loco', as you so quaintly put it Applejack. You must understand, to unicorns, magic is a sacred gift. Abusing it is one of the most terrible things that a unicorn can do. The story really starts long, long ago, during the age of Discord. Discord had entered the world after the Sisters were still weak from the effort of creation, and hunted them and the races they created for sport. Often he took to changing and warping the innermost nature of ponies and creatures alike as he saw fit. It was clear to everypony that such actions were reprehensible. Everypony but one half-mad unicorn.”
Rarity paused here, a far away look in her eyes. Nearly a minute went by before Applejack impatiently cleared her throat.
“Ahem. Ah thought you were gonna explain. Who was that unicorn? What did she have ta do with it?” Applejack asked.
“Everything, my dear Applejack, everything. Just as Discord was able to change the fundamental nature of creatures, that unicorn discovered that she could perform similar spells, twisting and warping creatures as she saw fit. She became ponykind's first Biomancer. She was nigh unstoppable, creating terrible armies of monsters, and was as feared as Discord until the Sisters sealed him away. Just like that, she disappeared as well. Think about it for a moment though, Applejack. A mere mortal was as feared as the very incarnation of chaos. No biomancer has ever since been as powerful, but unicorns are still just as terrified of biomancy now as we were over a thousand years ago. It's why you see so few unicorn healers and doctors-performing any sort of permanent magic on creatures or ponies is considered taboo, if not a sacrilegious desecration.”
“Ah guess that makes a bit of sense. But what was that unicorn called? The one that had all of Equestria so darn terrified?”
“Her name was Morgana L'Fey.”
Applejack was unable to contain her surprise.
“Fey? Ya mean like the holy keepers of the Golden Fields?”
“Exactly that. Though the meaning of Morgana has been lost to time, I'm afraid. Something just as heretical, I'm sure. The Princesses would surely know, but I would never dare ask them. At any rate, she didn't quite disappear as completely as ponies would have hoped.”
With this Rarity looked Applejack in the eye.
“I've never told you my surname, have I?”
Applejack shook her head dumbly.
“Rarity L'Fey, descendant of the Dread Mother of Biomancy, at your service fair Applejack.”
AN: Fanfiction Spotlight: Pinkiemania by Apocalypse Pony