• Member Since 28th Aug, 2012
  • offline last seen Jul 12th, 2021

ScatMan2001


T

[ 2nd Person fic starring YOU and BIG MACINTOSH ]
After a terrible accident, you are left to recuperate at Sweet Apple Acres. While your body rests, your mind is more active than ever, as it continues to relive that fateful night repeatedly.

Yes, this is a gay fic.

Rated Teen for language.

Picture created by Skipsy. Much thanks to him.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 58 )

My body is not quite ready. :eeyup:

It's about goddamn time a gay HiE comes around. :eeyup:

Regidar #4 · Mar 12th, 2014 · · 1 ·

this was so gay I came rainbows

Well damn, I just read my first HiE. Damn fine story.

What the hay is this?:twilightangry2:

Lovely little story. Just the right amount of sweet and bitter. :eeyup:

I really enjoyed this story good work

Why is this marked as complete?

ok I spent like 3 minutes just looking at the story deciding whether to read it or not.

"I don't know man...gay story...I just..." <--lots of that.

"then again...It is from scanman2001 so its going to be good regardless."

"and...I do like Big Mac...yeah Big Mac is a total bro."

"and there's no sex tag so I know it'll stay pretty clean...and hell if I don't like it I can just stop reading."

".......I'm going to give it a shot."


It was that for like three minutes...
I'm glad I read it.

I'll say this before I say anything else: I do not like 2nd person fics, because they're usually done so poorly that I can't figure out what's going on and I just get lost. It's nothing against the writers, I just don't like the storytelling device, in general.

That being said, I read this story, and I cried. It wasn't so much the scene where he is injured and loses his leg (thought that is a terrible thing), it was for the tender moments where he (I) would wipe the spaghetti sauce off his partner's face, but especially when Mac would draw him (me) in close, and it just felt so right. We all want someone to love, don't we? We want them near to us, and we want them to hold us when we're sad. We need that companionship. The tone for this story was pitch perfect. Excellent job.

Liked. Favorited. Followed.

This was nice and sweet.

Bell #13 · Mar 12th, 2014 · · 1 ·

I upvoted and faved this story, so I obviously liked it.

That said, I have some thoughts...

First, some of the writing and the way you phrased things just felt clunky to me. I wish I could be more specific, but "clunky" just about sums it up.

Second, the scene with the stallion spouting "Fag!" and "Queer" rubbed me the wrong way. In a society like Equestria, homophobia just leaves a bad taste in my mouth (even more so than IRL).

Just trying to give some constructive criticism, but all in all, like I said, I thought it was a pretty good story.

JBL

This is a pretty good beginning.

Personally, I think I would've liked it more if it wasn't told in 2nd-person. Given that (a) I'm not gay, and (b) I'm a girl, not a guy, having the narrative telling me that "I" do this and "I" do that just doesn't engage me that much to begin with, and as soon as the narrative tells me that "I" do something I know I wouldn't ever do -- such as smoking, which is a foul, nasty habit -- it takes me right out of the story.

2nd-person, IMO, is a lazy storytelling device. It may be all right for role-playing games and other interactive scenarios, but for a static narrative, it's bollocks. You've obviously got plenty of creativity, love; use some of it to create some original characters with complexity and depth, and make your stories about them (either 3rd-person or 1st-person), instead of trying to force the square peg of "me" to fit whatever round hole your story requires the protagonist to do.

I don't dislike the 2nd-person device enough to vote it down, but I'm not going to vote it up, either. Next time, give us a clearly-defined protagonist who's a real character in his own right, rather than some shapeless, colourless ghost named "you."

Tulip #16 · Mar 12th, 2014 · · 80 ·

Gay-shit like this should not exist.

:derpytongue2::pinkiehappy::trixieshiftright:
Interesting my good sir. liked and will follow.

4072264 ... seriously?... you are complaining about gayness... on a website... for my little pony fiction... brightly colored... adorable... ponies...

seriously dude? THE FUCK?!?!

4072322 I don't really like the way you said that, kind of sounds like you're saying that it's inherently gay to like the show and such, though I'm sure that's not the case.

I just have to say that I've never really had a problem with any gay stories and actually wish there were a few more, it's a nice change of pace.

4072437 I'm responding to who said it as well as what he said. Layouts right that liking ponies doesn't automatically make someone gay, but he/she sounded like the kind of f*cktard who'd believe it.

It's days like this that I'm thankful I'm open-minded... or bi... probably both. *Clasps hands together with a clap* Anyways... another fantastic story by Scatman2001! Can't wait to see what you churn out next. Oh, and 100 bucks says... that Twi and Pinkie are together, along with Flutters and Dash... Simply on the (Wholly assumptious) basis that the Rarity/AJ ship seems to be one of the three most common, alongside those other two I just mentioned, in regards to the Mane 6.

Yes, this is a gay fic.

Sweet.

4072264 shitty troll is shitty

4071337
Well, I do believe it is an HiE story, written in the second-person perspective, where the main protagonist is in a relationship with Big Macintosh.

4072264
You know... This isn't even worth it anymore. You know why? You know why I shouldn't bother explaining basic rights to you?
BECAUSE WE'RE WINNING NOW.

Should've been first person, not second, but otherwise well-done story. I felt invested in the short span that I was in this piece, and the shock-reveal was not mis-placed. Well done. :eeyup::heart:

It would be a joy to see this be made into a proper story

I have to say that this story was really, REALLY good. (the only problem was that it was written in 2nd person)
It really got me confused some times (and that's why i don't usually like 2nd person stories) but overall you did an awesome job! :heart::pinkiehappy::heart:

Well I have to say I liked the story, to me it was well written and quite intrigued me. I found the story sad, touching and quite sincere.

4072242 Forgive me, but the basic of Anonymous 2nd person view is that "you" make the character, it doesn't have to be you, but it can be a male in your own image, it can be entirely your own image of this random person. That's what gives this a good flare (to me at least) because there is no special character, this from the looks of it, a one shot fic where you just paint it in your own view of the words. But you have your own opinion on it, I just wanted to point my own at this scenario of yours.


4072204 Sadly bigotry can be anywhere, even in Equestria, there have been many fictional stories that have some kind of bigotry against one thing or another. For instance, in this fiction, homosexuality might have been accepted several years before this happened, when that old stallion was maybe in his mid 40 or 50, there he looked to be in his late 60's. So to him, he was ignorant of the world around him until the person who is displayed in 2nd person comes in, a human, an uncommon sight, who falls in love with Big Macintosh, where somewhere along the way, Rarity and Aj confessed their love to each other along the way of his stay. And that gave him a reason, a scapegoat to point all the things he was hating on because he feared change, this is all new to him and he doesn't know how to react. So instead of accepting it, he did was is displayed in this fiction. And sadly this happens around the world, it may hurt you but it happens, but thankfully we can fight it with patience, this is a war of the waiting game, and we are thankfully winning. But yes, just wanted to point that out.

4072264

closed minded a-holes should keep their mouths shut

I liked it, however I do agree that when in 2nd person you should have it be as gender neutral as possible, but then again it was meant to be a M/M fic. Ah who cares! It was still great! :pinkiehappy:

Really good i wish this was a full series. :rainbowderp:

I basically felt the same as "Mortal Kombat Brony" at first but I decided to give it a shot. Glad I did. Honestly I think this is one of the best one-shots I've read. I wish it could be part of a bigger story because there's a lot of content there that is hinted at that kept my attention.

Is it weird that I wish I was the main character in this Fan-Fic?.......:applejackunsure:

You know this is adding more fuel to the fire that ppl think all bronies are gay :rainbowlaugh::rainbowwild: Not to say that this wasnt a good story though:trixieshiftright::scootangel::trollestia::moustache:

4074976 To be fair, gay fanfiction is such a small percentage of the fanfiction on this site I doubt they have much of an impact on what people are assuming (assuming the people who make those accusations even come here). Seriously, I've only seen about seven gay 2nd person fanfics, only one was female though... Say, does the "all bronies are gay" assumption even apply to girl bronies? Because someone called me gay for being a brony once and that just confuses me.

Amazing story, I enjoyed it thoroughly. Oh, and congratulations on getting featured!

4072264
Then how is It existing? Perhaps reality has other plans.

4075138 people make fun of anything they dont understand or that is considered outside the ( Quote ) 'Norm' of todays society - Im more open minded than that --- even though im straight in regards to my sexuality - I will not automatically ridicule that wich I disagree with and or find odd -- iv found that life is more enjoyable when you have an open mind ^-^
Who cares what other people think ?
If they are true friends they will like you for who you are.
and all those jerks that make fun of those they dont understand... they will only lead empty lives

This was really good:twilightsmile:
Shame t'is a one shot though...

4071204
What he said. This was superb. A dear friend if mine lost both legs to an IED in Iraq, and he had similar dreams for months. It's a hard thing, and you pulled off the emotions damn well.

I hate to sound like the mindless masses, but any chance of more?

Well, it was a decent story, but you got my apotemnophobia acting up so... Nope. :twilightblush:
Seriously though, still a thumbs up.

The part where "I" wiped Mac's face clean and he gave a quick nuzzle almost killed me to death with cuteness! :eeyup:

Eww gay.
That aside, The writing,story,and overall quality was good. Not my cup of tea of course, :P But you are a good writer. Make more fics! I implore you. And uhh... try not to make them ALL gay hmm? :rainbowwild:

Is it mean that I kept thinking of them as weenie buddies? :rainbowlaugh:

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