Trixie's Forest Retreat

by crowscrowcrow

Chapter 11 - Regained

Rainbow Dash held her hoof firmly planted against her face, hearing Fluttershy's attempts to introduce herself to Trixie. That pony seriously needed to work on being more assertive. She could not understand why this was so hard for her friend. It was not like she was expecting Fluttershy to shout at a dragon or anything — that was never going to happen — just to keep her voice steady for once.

“You found Trixie?” Fluttershy smiled delighted. “That's great. Where is she, Rainbow? What's wrong? You look ill…”

Rainbow Dash trembled. “There is no time, Fluttershy! Follow me quick, she's hurt!” Immediately she took to the skies again.

Rainbow Dash sighed quietly, letting her head lean against the wall as she stared at the door-post, not really looking at it however, as her mind was elsewhere. She thought back on the stressful trip they had getting Trixie here. Rainbow Dash had barely held it together. She could still hear the sickening sound echo through her mind from when her hooves met with the unicorn's skull.

“Trixie! Rainbow Dash, what happened to her?!” Fluttershy cried out, seeing the bleeding, passed out unicorn, and quickly kneeled down beside her.

Rainbow's ears laid down flat. “It was an accident! She kept yelling at me! I… I didn't mean…” She watched Fluttershy turn back to face her, staring in disbelief for a crushing couple of seconds.

“G-get a doctor,” she finally stammered, letting her attention return to Trixie. “I-I can't fix this. Now, Rainbow, now!” The urgency in Fluttershy's voice was so severe, Rainbow Dash did not even spare a word, immediately kicking off the ground to rocket towards Ponyville.

Shivering with the thought of what might have happened, she did not like the little show-off, but hurting her that badly had never been her intention. Rainbow Dash still was not entirely sure how it even ended up that way, she was there to -reluctantly- help take Trixie out of the forest. Well… I certainly managed to do that.

Letting her gaze fall to the floor ashamed, she was not even allowed into the room to avoid causing the weakened Trixie any more stress. When they heard the fall upstairs, Rainbow had been the first to get the door only, to freeze after a reminder from Fluttershy.

“She got lucky. It's bad, but if she gets plenty of rest she should be okay, keep doing the tests and if she does get worse come get me immediately.” Nurse Redheart packed up what remained of her bandage rolls into a small bag. “The first week will be most important. She must stay in bed; no activities,and no moving about, or she WILL get worse.”

It figured that the second they left Trixie alone, the first thing she tried was to get out of bed and accuse Fluttershy of holding her captive, getting more than a little stressed out in the process. The urge to march in there and give Trixie another piece of her mind was just barely overruled by the guilt of putting her into the position in the first place. It will be fine. Even if she's incredibly shy, I've never seen Fluttershy shy away from helping any living thing. Rainbow Dash grinned cheesily at her, self-proclaimed, hilarious wit.

“T-try to sleep, it’s okay now.” Fluttershy made her way out of the bedroom, finding Rainbow Dash standing there with a grin on her face, earning a confused look from the mare. “Are you laughing, Rainbow?”

Rainbow Dash tensed up, pulled from her thoughts to look at her friend. Of course she had to come right then. “What? No no, well yes but only because I thought of something awesome.” She tried to keep her voice down and gave a glance towards the door. “So how is she?”

“Not worse, but not much better either… At least she did not hit her head during the fall, and I don't think she will try it again soon.” Fluttershy moved past Rainbow Dash down the stairs. “Rainbow Dash, ponies are animals too right?”

This time it was Fluttershy that earned the look of confusion from Rainbow Dash “What? Uhm yeah, I guess?” She followed after Fluttershy, giving a swish of her rainbow-patterned tail as she did so, just glad to get moving again.

“Good, then I wasn't lying. I'm going to make her something to eat. Can you go into town and do something for me please? It won't take long.”

---

“Trixie wants to leave, now.” Trixie rolled onto her side and slipped out of the bed, careful not to move too quickly and set off fireworks in her head again.

“W-what? Why? Was it something I said? I'm sorry.” Fluttershy took a few steps backwards away from the bed. “Y-you really should stay in bed, doctor’s orders…” Fluttershy tried to protest.

“The Great and Powerful Trixie does not need to explain herself.” Steadying herself on her hooves, a brief look of concern flashed over her face before she managed to mask it, taking careful steps towards the door.

“Trixie please, tell me what's wrong.” Fluttershy walked with Trixie, staying too close for the showmare’s comfort.

“You are friends with those ponies!” She snapped at Fluttershy, causing her to recoil. “How can Trixie trust you? You just want to keep Trixie here. Trixie saw Rainbow Dash. She knows your friends are here!” For what purpose she would be kept by the ponies that had the most reason to hate her she was not sure, but it could not possibly be good.

“W-we are not keeping you here Trixie, but well uhm… you just can't leave. I'm sorry…” Fluttershy said hesitantly. “It's not safe.” The ears of both ponies perked up when they heard fast wing-beats rising up the stairs.

“If Trixie is not being kept, then allow Trixie to leave! Otherwise, what is the difference?” Her head was swimming at this point, and a misstep caused her to nearly floor herself, if not for Fluttershy being so close by she could catch her.

“Oh oh, please be careful. What if you fall, what if you hit your head, what if you hit your head and you fall?” Fluttershy sounded terrified.

“Wow what's going on here?” Rainbow Dash landed nearby, shrugging off a saddlebag to the floor. She knew she was not meant to enter, but by the looks of things, the damage had been done anyway. “Where do you think you’re going?” She pointed a hoof at Trixie, then towards the bed. “Back to bed,” Rainbow Dash said, giving a glance at Fluttershy, who slipped away from Trixie and past her, but not paying the timid mare much mind.

Trixie's eyes went wide at the sight of Rainbow Dash, taking a quick unsteady step back. “Y-you stay away from Trixie! Trixie is leaving, y-you won’t ever see her again.” She bit her tongue. That sounded less like threatening and more like pleading, and she hated herself for it.

“…Wait.” Fluttershy stood by the saddlebags, her voice almost inaudible compared to the two loud ponies.

“What? No, I'm not just gonna let you walk out of here. Are you crazy?” Rainbow Dash lifted a hoof to tap the side of her head. “You could die!”

“…Wait,” Fluttershy's spoke looking from one to the other, pointing a hoof down at the bags.

Trixie swallowed hard. It sounded to her like Rainbow Dash was threatening her. She was really not allowed to leave, and if she tried, the violent mare would take her down again like before. “N-no you can't keep Trixie prisoner! Trixie did nothing to deserve this!” Tears swelled up in her eyes while she took another step back from Rainbow Dash.

“…Wait.” The pair still ignored the soft spoken pegasus.

Rainbow took a step forward. “I don't even know what you are talking about anymore. Are you even listening to me? You can't leave, or you'll die, and it will be my fault!” She stared down at the ever shrinking Trixie. What's wrong with that unicorn?

“…Wait.” Fluttershy shook a hoof, trying to get their attention while watching the increasing distress.

Trixie tried to take another step back, but her hind legs gave out on her, causing Trixie crumble to her haunches, shaking as she stared up at Rainbow Dash. “T-Trixie understands… Please don't hurt Trixie any more.” Crying openly with fright as she stared up at the mare, she could not remember much about their previous encounter besides rainbow colors and pain, both of which returning to her head.

Rainbow Dash looked puzzled with Trixie's reaction. “Okay good, if you understand,” she reached a hoof out for Trixie who flinched in turn, “then get back to be—”

“Waaait!” Fluttershy yelled, drawing the attention of both shocked mares to her. Fluttershy picked up the saddlebags, then knelt down besides the crying and trembling unicorn. “Shhh… It's okay.” Gingerly, she moved one hoof around Trixie, using the other to open up the saddlebags. “Look what Rainbow Dash brought you.”

Trixie shook from muzzle to tail while Fluttershy approached. Her head felt as though she'd been trapped in a vice. The soothing words calmed her down somewhat, while the hoof around her felt warm and comforting. Trixie Leaned against the kind mare and peered into the opened bag. Her eyes went wide.

Inside the bag was a supply of oats, a canteen, a rolled up parchment, but more importantly than any of those: a familiar star-patterned purple hat. Trixie's eyes locked onto the hat, then shot back up to Rainbow Dash, recalling what Fluttershy had said. She did remember seeing the blue pegasus bring the saddlebags in. “Y-you got this for Trixie?”

Rainbow Dash stared down at the pair while the events started to sink in and make more sense to her. “Uhm. Yeah I did. Your cloak's on the other side.” She nodded to the right saddlebag that was still closed.

Fluttershy fished out the hat, handing it to Trixie, who clutched it to her chest so tightly, it might have split in two if she was any stronger. Fluttershy motioned to Rainbow Dash and gave a nod down at the bag. “We were going to give the saddlebag to you once you were ready to leave, but… Well I guess you are ready now.”

A few quick glances were exchanged before Rainbow Dash knelt down as well, opening up the other bag. This one contained many of the same items, though the oats were replaced with hay, and the scroll with a small empty sack. Rainbow Dash pulled out the cloak and offered it to Trixie.

Trixie leaned closer against Fluttershy, feeling her shaking subside slowly in her embrace. Even Rainbow Dash seemed less scary than she had a moment ago. She reached out one hoof to carefully take the cloak, then held it just as tightly as her hat. She stared at the old clothes like they were the greatest treasure she could have asked for.

She felt strange. The entire thing did not fit in at all with what she'd expected from the ponies, but here they were. She looked at the pair of pegasi. She wanted to say something, but struggled to find the words: words she'd not spoken in so long they felt alien on her tongue, but at the same time so perfect.

“Thank you.”

Author's Note:

Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed!

Longest chapter yet, did not plan on it being quite this long but I did not want to rob you guys of the resolution.
Since Trixie and Fluttershy Hijacked most of the chapter yesterday or half the setup for this would have taken place there.
Trixie finally catches a break,that does not involve breaking something physically.
We finally see Rainbow Dash again, she's still a bit of an antagonist but she's not doing it on purpose this time (nuance just isn't her thing), that's progress right?

Until next chapter^^

Comments

[Thisisalongname]

3977297

usually what an author does is tag that chapter as gore/sex and give fair warning in both the synopsis, the authors notes the chapter before, and in the chapter title. Then they release and abridged version, say chapter 25.5, that leaves out the descriptive elements. This way you don't have to tag the whole story as gore, but can still have a particularly heavy scene that you felt the story needs.

[crowscrowcrow]

4003806
Oh i see.
That was really helpful thanks a lot!
I will keep that in mind.

[Knight of the Raven]

I noticed you wrote both 'show-mare' and 'showmare' across the chapters. I suggest you harmonize the spelling.

I liked the lines;

'It was not like she was expecting Fluttershy to shout at a dragon or anything, that was never going to happen'

'she was there to -reluctantly- help take Trixie out of the forest. 'Well... I certainly managed to do that.'

and

'words she'd not spoken in so long they felt alien on her tongue but at the same time so perfect.'

I found some mistakes;

add a comma after 'smiled' in 'Fluttershy smiled delighted'

'What's wrong you look Ill...' should be 'What's wrong? You look ill...'

add a period after 'Rainbow Dash trembled'

'Immediately taking to the skies again' should be 'She immediately took to the skies again'

'She sighed quietly, letting her head lean against the wall while staring at the doorpost. She wasn't really looking at anything however, as her mind was elsewhere, thinking back on the stressful trip they'd had getting Trixie here.' flows better than 'Sighing quietly letting her head lean against the wall staring at the door-post, not really looking at however as the athletes mind was elsewhere. Thinking back on the stressful trip they'd had getting Trixie here.'

add a semicolon after 'Rainbow had barely held it together'

'her hoofs met with the unicorns skull' should be 'her hooves met with the unicorn's skull'

add a comma after 'Rainbow Dash' in '“Trixie! Rainbow Dash what happened to her?!”'

'Fluttershy cried out seeing the bleeding passed out unicorn and quickly knelled down besides her.' should be 'Fluttershy cried out upon seeing the bleeding, passed out unicorn and quickly knelt down beside her.'

'Rainbows ears laid down flat' should be 'Rainbow's ears laid down flat.'

'she watched Fluttershy turned back to face Rainbow Dash' should be 'She watched Fluttershy turn back to face her,'

'“G-get a doctor.” She finally stammered, letting her attention return to Trixie' should be '“G-get a doctor,” she finally stammered, letting her attention return to Trixie.'

add a comma after 'Now Rainbow'

add 'was' after 'The urgency in Fluttershy's voice'

'Shivering with the thought of what might have happened, she' should be 'She shivered with the thought of what might have happened. She'

add a comma after 'It figured that the second they left Trixie alone'

add 'was' before 'just barely overruled'

'Grinning softly at her, self proclaimed, hilarious wit.' should be 'She grinned softly at her self-proclaimed hilarious wit.'

'its okay now' should be 'it's okay now'

'finding Rainbow Dash standing there with a grin on her face earning a confused look from the mare.' should be 'finding Rainbow Dash standing there with a grin on her face. She looked at her in confusion.' because Fluttershy is the subject of the entire sentence,

'Rainbow Dash tenses up pulled from her thoughts to look at her friend, of course she had to come right then.' should be 'Rainbow Dash tensed up as she looked at her friend, pulled from her thoughts; of course she had to come right then.'

'Moving past Rainbow Dash down the stairs' should be 'Fluttershy moved past Rainbow Dash down the stairs'

add a period after 'the look of confusion from Rainbow Dash'

'Turning around to follow after Fluttershy' should be 'She turned around to follow after Fluttershy'

'set of fireworks' should be 'set off fireworks'

'doctors orders' should be 'doctor's orders'

'Steadying herself on her hoofs' should be 'She steadied herself on her hooves'

'Taking careful steps towards the door.' should be 'She took careful steps towards the door.'

'showmares comfort' should be 'showmare's comfort'

add a comma after 'Trixie saw Rainbow Dash'

add a period after 'Fluttershy said hesitantly'

'The ears of both ponies perking up' should be 'The ears of both ponies perked up'

remove the hyphen in 'wing-beats'

'Oh oh please be careful what if you fall' should be 'Oh, oh please be careful, what if you fall' ; I think you did well not to use interrogation marks for each question since Fluttershy is stammering in terror,

add a comma after 'Wow' in '“Wow what's going on here?”'

'shrugging of a saddlebag' should be 'shrugging off a saddlebag'

'“Where do you think your going?”' should be '“Where do you think you're going?”'

'Pointing a hoof at Trixie then towards the bed' should be 'She pointed a hoof at Trixie, then towards the bed.'

'at the sight of Rainbow Dash taking a quick unsteady step back' should be 'at the sight of Rainbow Dash and she took a quick, unsteady step back'

'No I'm not just gonna let you walk out of here are you crazy?' should be 'No, I'm not just gonna let you walk out of here! Are you crazy?' ; you might even want to add an exclamation mark before or after the interrogation mark,

'Raising a hoof to tap the side of her head.' should be 'She rose a hoof to tap the side of her head.'

'“...Wait.” Fluttershy's spoke looking from one to the other pointing a hoof down at the bags.' should be '“...Wait,” Fluttershy spoke, looking from one to the other and pointing a hoof down at the bags.'

the comma after 'Trixie swallowed hard' should be a semicolon,

'Tears swelling up in her eyes while taking another step' should be 'Tears swelled up in her eyes as she took another step'

add a comma after 'Rainbow took a step forward'

'her hind-legs gave out on her letting' should be 'her hindlegs gave out on her, letting'

I think the 'anymore' in 'Please don't hurt Trixie anymore' should be 'any more' since Rainbow Dash isn't currently hurting Trixie,

'Rainbow Dash looked puzzled with Trixie's reaction. “Okay good if you understand” Reaching a hoof out for Trixie who flinched in turn “Than get back to be-”' should be 'Rainbow Dash looked puzzled at Trixie's reaction. “Okay, good if you understand.” She reached a hoof out for Trixie who flinched in turn. “Then get back to be-”'

'Gingerly moving one hoof around the mare. Using the other to open up the saddlebags' should be 'She gingerly moved one hoof around the mare, using the other to open up the saddlebags.'

add a 'and' after 'Fluttershy approached her head'

'The soothing words calming her down' should be 'The soothing words calmed her down'

'Leaning against the kind mare' should be 'She leaned against the kind mare'

'Your cloak's on the otherside' should be 'Your cloak's on the other side'

'Nodding to the right saddlebag' should be 'She nodded to the right saddlebag'

'Fluttershy fished out the hat handing it to Trixie' should be 'Fluttershy fished out the hat before handing it to Trixie,' ; note the comma at the end,

'Pulling out the cloak and offering it to Trixie.' should be 'She pulled out the cloak and offered it to Trixie.'

add a comma after 'Trixie leaned closer against Fluttershy'

'had' should be 'did 'in 'Rainbow Dash seemed less scary than she had a moment ago'

and

'Reaching out one hoof to carefully take the cloak and hold it with her hat staring at the old clothes' should be 'She reached out one hoof to carefully take the cloak and hold it with her hat, staring at the old clothes'

[TheGreatEater]

Poor Trixie finally catches a break, that doesn't involve something of hers breaking physically breaking.

4357989

You're very thourough, great editing skills.

[crowscrowcrow]

5358666
She really is breaking new ground here. ^.~
At this rate you'll be at the rant in no time. ^^

Yea, Raven is frightfully thorough. O.O

[TheGreatEater]

5358894

One can only hope.

[Little Jackie Papercut]

“W-we are not keeping you here Trixie, but well uhm… you just can't leave. I'm sorry…” Fluttershy said hesitantly. “It's not safe.”

Ponyville has been overrun by zombies.

[crowscrowcrow]

6114165
Yup.
There is only one thing left to do.

derpicdn.net/img/2014/12/7/780147/large.jpeg

[Little Jackie Papercut]

6114482
Next chapter: Reanimation

[crowscrowcrow]

6116380

It's actually not the next chapter, but 103 chapters later: Chapter 114 - Reanimate.
Ah, I suppose I might as well warn you now, I've been told the story can progress a bit slowly.

[Prince Leviathan]

I quite enjoyed that cute moment between them.
So heartwarming.

[Victor07]

It will be interesting to see how this story unfolds, with a Trixie who at the same time fears the rainbow, and finds comfort close to fluttershy.