Isaiah Mustafa, now Black Jesus, walked out of the boutique, a bottle of Old Spice in his hand. Beside him trotted Rarity, who volunteered to be one of his twelves disciples after finding how much better Old Spices mare scented body wash was compared to the much more expensive products she used.
Black Jesus had a mission, and that was to spread the word of Old Spice to colts, mares, and foals alike. He also had another mission, and that was to reunite with Steroids Man and take down his giant brother, a false prophet who used Old Spices holiness for power.
But first, he must convert the locals in the area to Old Spice body wash. Rarity led Black Jesus into the town center, earning all sorts of strange looks. Some of the ponies were confused about Black Jesus, having never seen a human before. Others were lustful, taking notice of his bulging muscles and his "leg". They walked up to the Apple families stand, where Big Mac was selling their product.
"Big Macintosh, may I ask a favor of you?" Rarity inquired.
"Eeyup." He replied simply.
"My friend here is a holy man, and wishes to spread the word of his sacred body wash, Old Spice. May we use your stand as a stage so he may preach?" Rarity asked.
"Nope. Apple Spice is the best body wash." Big Mac proclaimed.
"Let me see for myself." Black Jesus said, stepping towards Big Mac, taking a deep whiff of his scent.
It kind of freaked Big Mac out.
"It would appear you are wearing mares scented body wash, my son. Here, smell." Black Jesus offered, holding part of his robe out to the stallion. Reluctantly, Big Mac cautiously sniffed the robe. His eyes widened with surprise and his jaw dropped, experiencing the miracle of Old Spice for the first time in his life. It smelt like how a colt should smell, the type of colt that the ladies wanted. Black Jesus smiled, offering the bottle of Old Spice in his hand to the stallion, who quickly took it and stowed it away.
"Go ahead." Big Macintosh urged.
Black Jesus nodded, climbing on top of the stand. After checking if it was sturdy enough, he helped Rarity up, so she could help spread the word.
"Attention! Attention please!" Rarity called out to the crowd, using her magic to augment her voice. All the ponies in the town center turned their heads to Rarity and Black Jesus. "We have an announcement."
"My children, I have come from far away lands to save you. Where I lived, we heard word of a land where colts smell like ladies, and mares use expensive body washes, shampoos, and perfumes that colts pretend to like. Mares, be honest with me, does your colt smell like a mare?" Black Jesus asked.
"Mine does," one of the mares called out, "he uses that Apple Spice stuff."
"My colt does too!" Another mare called out. A chorus of agreements from the mares in the crowd followed.
Black Jesus raised his hands into the air, signalling them to stop their chatter so he could continue. "And colts, don't you hate the smell of your mares perfumes, shampoos, and body washes?"
"Yes!" All the colts in crowd shouted out in unison, earning annoyed glances from the mares.
"We have the answer, fellow ponies!" Rarity called out, levitating a bottle of Old Spices mare scented body wash out of her bag. Black Jesus held out his hand, and a bottle of Old Spice colts scented body wash rose out of his palm, earning a chorus of "ooo's" and "ahhh's".
"My children, this is the answer to your prayers. The answer your Goddesses couldn't answer. Rarity, my disciple, would you mind giving them a demo?" Black Jesus requested.
"My pleasure, darling." Rarity cooed, her horn pulsing a bright blue as she cast a spell that sent out a wave of smell.
"This, my children, is Old Spice colts scented body wash." Black Jesus stated. "Mares, isn't this what you want your colts to smell like?"
A wave of cheers of agreement emanated from the mares in the crowd. Black Jesus turned to Rarity and smiled at her, signalling her to use the other spell. "And this, my children, is Old Spices mares scented body wash."
Upon saying this, Rarity's horn almost turned a whitish color, as she transformed the scent into the mares scented variant.
"Colts, isn't this how you wish your mares smelt like? So you wouldn't have to pretend that she smells good."
"Yes!" All the colts shouted, this time not earning annoyed glances from the nearby mares.
Black Jesus knelt down slightly and bowed his head. "Father, gives these ponies the scent they deserve. Cleanse them of their bad scent." Black Jesus whispered.
Seconds later, a bottle of Old Spice appeared in front of each and every mare, colt, and foal in the town center. A wave of applause and cheering resounded from the crowd.
"Thank you, my disciple." Black Jesus said to Rarity.
"It was nothing." Rarity replied smugly, blushing bashfully from the praise.
Meanwhile, in Trottingham, Steroids Man sprinted through the streets, not even breaking a sweat. He jumped up into the air, leaping over a trio of townhouses and landing in the town square, the cement cracking under him.
"ALL YOU SCRAWNY WEAKLINGS NEED OLD SPICE IN YOUR LIFE! OLD SPICE IS SO POWERFUL, IT CAN BLOCK OUT THE SUN!" Steroids Man shouted at the frightened ponies surrounding him. As he said this, the sun slowly dimmed and died out.
Celestia flew in the general direction of Manehattan as fast as she could, hoping to get there before the giant hairless black ape got back. And before it got dark, it seemed the sun was setting at a very rapid pace.
But... it was still the afternoon...
Celestia teleported out into space, about 10,000 miles away from the sun. Where the sun was supposed to be, at least.
"OH HELL NO!" Celestia shouted, her horn glowing a piercing white light. Seconds later, a new sun formed.
"WHAT?!" Steroids Man shouted, enraged, before stomping off.