I would like to begin this preface with what a preface is for: a quick note from the author.

I have started a number of different stories, yet as I'm writing this I have only completed one of them, and I think I'm beginning to figure out the reason why. I need to fully understand what my skills are as a writer, not what I want my skills to be. If I can't figure that out, then I shouldn't be writing. Simple as that. I realize that I need to take my time when I'm writing; even though my quick-release chapters of a couple of my stories do draw consistent lulz from some of my loyal readers, that itself is a problem: my loyal readers. It would be disturbingly accurate to describe these 'loyal readers' of mine in regard to my chapters as telling stories around a campfire, except adding a little something different to the story each time, but still getting laughs from the same dozen or so guys. Yeah, you heard me. A dozen. That's how many people I believe account for a vast majority of my total views. Anyway, onward to the story - a story that will hopefully cause you to shit bricks...assuming that there's a positive connotation to that figure of speech, that is...

~~Brendan Kirk "Da Beejees" Julian

EDIT: I've actually decided that it would be beneficial to you readers if I provided some basic information about the different 'ingredients' that I will be mentioning throughout the course of this story.

The ingredients:

Myrrh

Cinnamon

Cassia

Frankincense

Spikenard

Oak branches

Palm leaves

(I won't include the last two in this, though, due to how common they are)

Details:

Myrrh

Commiphora myrrha

Physical form: Resin made from dried tree sap

Abundance: Extremely rare

Obtained from/as: Small, thorny trees

Random fact: At times in ancient history it was often considered to be just as valuable as gold, and at other times more valuable than gold

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Cinnamon

Cinnamomum verum

Physical form: Inner bark

Abundance: Pretty damn common

Obtained from/as: Small shoots of trees

Random fact: The phoenix builds its nest from cinnamon and cassia, but also uses it as the 'tinder' for it's funeral pyre.

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Cassia

Cinnamomum aromaticum

Physical form: Bark

Abundance: About as common as its close relative, listed directly above

Obtained from/as: Whole branches and small trees

Random fact: Most of the spice sold as cinnamon in the United States and Canada is actually cassia.

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Frankincense

Boswellia sacra

Physical form: Resin made from dried tree sap

Abundance: Rare, mainly due to the venemous snakes that inhabit the trees that it's harvested from (I doubt that that will be included in the story though)

Obtained from/as: Aromatic resin

Random fact: It is used in incense and perfumes.

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Spikenard

Nardostachys grandiflora

Physical form: Flowering plant

Abundance: Relatively rare

Obtained from/as: Essential oil made from grinding up the plant's rhizomes (underground stems)

Random fact: For some reason, the scent of spikenard attracts cats. Do NOT ask me why, because I have NO fucking clue.

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