• Member Since 1st Jan, 2014
  • offline last seen Jun 25th, 2019

rcmero


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NOTICE (I'm seeing a lot of people Googling this very page): This is a brushed up version of the original story by No1MporXant, which you can find here in all its semi-decent grammar goodness (and I recommend you do, the original author notes are simply too long to be able to be posted here, plus you can find some additional stories taking place in this universe). I obtained permission from the author to write this story, if you'll bother scrolling down to the comments. So that came first, NOT this story!


It has been a month since Twilight's princess coronation. She still feels like she isn't ready to take the title. However, that all changes after a stay in the Crystal Empire's castle, where a mysterious unicorn throws Twilight's Element of Magic through a magic mirror and dares her to go through it to get it back.

However, things take a turn for the worse shortly after Twilight and Spike go through the mirror, where they show up again and the mirror suddenly implodes. Yet, the two are acting weird... Spike keeps acting like a dog, not to mention Twilight claims she's a human...

Original script and idea by No1MporXant. This is my first non-crossover fanfiction and also my first non-adaptation fanfiction (kinda). Constructive criticism is always welcome.


TAG/CONTINUITY NOTICE: In case you couldn't figure it out from the description, this is an alternate Equestria Girls universe. The main EqG-verse is mentioned once, but that's it. If you'll notice, I wrote this story around the time where the first EqG movie played around these parts--i.e. before Rainbow Rocks aired in the US. The original was also written long before it was announced. Therefore, Rainbow Rocks and Friendship Games are not considered canon to this story (and in fact, the latter directly contradicts with this story).


Cross-Posted on:
* FanFiction.Net
* Archive of Our Own
* deviantART

Chapters (17)
Comments ( 64 )

That is classic. Best of luck with this story. It seems like it will be epic.

I see a plot hole

If the mirror and the Crystal Empire where gone for a thousand years, how did Sunset Shimmer even go through in the first place when that is known to have occured before Celestia apprenticed Twilight?

"Because any Twilight from any world is a friend of ours,"

Then how about the Lunaverse Twilight? :trixieshiftright:

Good Chapter. Now I can't wait for the flight problem to happen. You should have Human twilight get a crush on Pony Flash, just like pony Twilight has on Human flash.

3850481 That will happen, trust me.

Honestly... Most of the story seems to just be Equestria Girls in written form, excluding where StarSwirl is mentioned. I am actually disappointed. :ajbemused: I haven't read longer than chapter two, though, so my opinion may change once I finish reading it.

3853791 You may wanna read the original script if you're confused. I'll tell you right ahead, though, that it is different from the original. For one, there are two Twilights and two Sunsets.

Well nice job with this chapter, I was just expecting a little talk what is happening in pony world. Best of luck with the next chapter.

3859046 That's in the next chapter.

Well, you sure are following the story of EQG right, and even some aspect of the switch is very much noticeable.

I'm sorry, but even if you change up the dialogue, most of these scenes are narratively pointless unless the reader hasn't seen the Equestria Girls movie. You should focus more on events not seen in the film, or that are significantly altered from the film. For example, Twilight's meeting Rainbow early here, which is important. But the scene with Celestia isn't apparently important at all because it's not changed enough.

congratulation. this sucks.

3865966 I said I wanted constructive criticism, but not that. At least tell me what I can do to make it better.

3869297
How about not just reenact/retell events from the freaking movie?
You want to do a switch a ro story with the human Twilight and her dog (now turned drgaon) Spike running around in Equestria? Then focus on that damn it. Don't focuss on the story of a movie we already know, focus on what may have happened in the pony world outside of Twilight's experience. You know, create something similiar to the episode where Spike took care of the pets, which happened simultaneously to the Crystal Empire qualification. Instead we get that. You know what retelling stuff people can see in other shows is? Unimaginative garbage. And the fact you are not able to realize that makes it clear you have not much writing experience in general.

Nice job with this chapter, though I recommend that you add some plot twist with human twilight in Pony's body. It would make it seem that human twilight had some crisis to help with and she learned about friendship, also add about spike the dog in the dragon body, see what happens with him.

3876225 Again, next chapter. I was gonna add another scene with pony Twilight, but this chapter was long enough as it is.

3876260 Okay. Best of luck with the next chapter.

I like how this chapter showed what is going on in pony world. Best of luck with the next chapter.

What would be nice is the whole elephant in the room... you know; Parents. Because this is the HUMAN!Twilight Sparkle we're talking about, I'm sure they'd be worried that their daughter never returned home from school... Just saying I think it'd make it pretty funny. :rainbowlaugh: Not to mention her HUMAN!brother...

3897560 That's later, don't worry. Also, human Shining Armour is not in this story as far as I know.

Star Swirl the Bearded!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am guessing that. This great. I can't wait for the next chapter. Best of luck

3912090 And we have a winner! I don't have anything to give to you, unfortunately.

3912153 You could mention my OC in your story. He is my profile pic, name Solar Flare.

3912172 If I wanted to mention OCs, I'd do a self-insert and mention my own OC.

3912186 Okay. Best of luck with the next chapter. This story just became really good.

Nice chapter. I liked it. I can't wait for the next one.

Nice chapter. I am glad the human Twilight is getting a crush on Flash now. I can't wait for the next chapter.

Nice job with this chapter. I can't wait for Twilight to meet her parents and brother. You should have pony Twilight do the same thing.

Nice chapter. Can't wait for the next one.

3985558 Expect the next chapter March 4th. Equestria Girls is pretty much the only good movie that plays on TV that week. The only other things they play are another rerun of the same old Barbie movie and a stupid Noddy movie. I'm so glad I won't be home Wednesday afternoon, Noddy's gonna haunt me till I die.

Interesting story, but I found some minor things you may want to edit.

She then reappears in front of her, revealing her appearance: light orange skin and red and yellow mane.

I think that should be "coat"... unless Sunset was shaved.

“I suppose Sunset Shimmer though you wouldn’t notice right away this wasn’t yours, and by the time you did, it would be too late to go after your crown and Element of Harmony.”

And That should be "thought".

4003608 Thank you thank you thank you. Kinda a bit of hard work editing it everywhere but I'll edit it here at least.

Nice chapter, but I found some things you may want to edit.

“... and a bun in the middle.”

“A… what? What in the hay is a bun?”

I'm pretty sure that should be "patty" since a bun is usually bread.

Upon hearing Rarity’s name, Spike instantly grabs the book. “There’s a Rarity here?” Realizing what he made, Spike quickly gives Twilight back the book.

And I'm pretty sure that should be "did".

I found something you may want to edit.

“You man like how you get over after what happened with me?” Rainbow Dash speaks up.

That should be "mean".

Nice twist with having starswirl already explain to Twilight velvet and Nightlight about twilight. I can't wait for the next chapter.

3848389
It was explained in one of the comics. The mirror was originally in Celestias possession and was moved after to the Crystal Empire after its reappearance.

Sorry you feel a bit down. He just may have more time than you. Don't judge yourself to him. I liked this chapter. I honestly can't wait for the next one. Keep a smile on and if you need to say anything, PM me.

Glad I'm not the only one who's forgotten to update their stories. I know how you feel, man.

4166356 But at least you update frequently, right? I have neglected Port-Ed 2 for so long, I don't even know if my prereader's available yet.

Nice chapter. I wonder who is the real threat here. I guess we will find out in the next chapter or the one after that.

WHAT?!?!?!?! That was one funny cartoon at the end. I can't wait for the next chapter.

Nice chapter. I loved how you had the battle take place as the same time in both dimensions. I could see the little Mermaid 2 reference.

4401170 Yeah, that was a pain to do. And it's gonna be even more confusing next chapter. Like I said, I have to create portmanteaus just to be understood who's who. Mainly for Twilight.

Also, I did an unintentional reference. Yay...? :yay: Explain this for me, I'm confused. I never watched much Disney. You can tell I didn't see Frozen. Screw you sis.

4403404 Your battle in the human world reminds me alot of the little mermaid 2. Just watch this clip.

I own nothing.

4403887 I can assure you, that was completely unintentional. Unless the author of the script was going for that too. I'll wait for his feedback on deviantART and then I'll get back to you.

4403930 It's okay. That fight just reminded me of that clip.

Wow, and I was just starting to like EQG.

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