• Member Since 6th Mar, 2012
  • offline last seen 8 hours ago

CrypticMetaphor


*SPOILERS* ;)

T

Long has the coffee branch of StarBuck been open in Canterlot and long has Celestia frequented it. She always grabs her order and returns to the castle to enjoy it, Luna however has been curious of the beverage known as coffee. So one day she sips her first drink....nopony was prepared for what transpired.

Dramatic Read of the fic! : Done by EnderBlaze

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 200 )

Luna in corset

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And that is the cleanest one I could find. Now back to the rest of the story!

One thing was for sure, the male attendees made it rain only further encouraging her

So many wrong things running through my head.

NotsurelostcountbutIamsureI’minthelowhundreds.”

Wow, princesses must come equipped with extra large bladders.

And for the ending I see you've read the Luna issue of the MLP comic.

“This drink….,” Luna smiled widely, “I like it,” she then slammed her hoof down as her heart beat with boosted power, “ANOTHER!!!”

derpicdn.net/img/2012/9/1/87997/large.png

Damn... well, if you need a way for a highly-energetic Luna to expend her energy... I'll help.
i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/298/073/68e.png

don't drink a lot of coffee

- exam period. Two litres of coffee per day. It took me five days to get back to normal level and stop seeing noises.

Excellent story. Luna should try energy drinks as well.

:rainbowlaugh: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!

3847725
Her bladder is magic, like a bag of holding. ;)

this is what happens to me when i drink coffee.:pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy:

What happens when Princess Luna finds out about quad-shot mocha espressos? :rainbowlaugh: :twilightoops:

My username choice for practically anything else feels slightly ironic right now. I MUST BE LUNA.
(It's CoffeeFan15. Yeah.)

Scepters huh?:ajsmug:

Hmm, funny, good timing, short enough to not drag out the joke but long enough to not be brief.

This fic, I like it. ANOTHER!:flutterrage:

Oh god...

I was laughing loud through all of this.

Loved it immensely!

~Skeeter The Lurker

Wtf Cryp xD MUST READ NOW!!!:flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::flutterrage::derpytongue2:

That cover image is going to give me nightmares you know?
I'm sending you the bill for my insomnia. :rainbowlaugh:
Can't stop laughing at this.

3851769

All these comments and you reply to mine...

Can I ask why?

~Skeeter The Lurker

3851881
*shrug* No reason, just replied o3o

3851895

Works for me!

Lovely tale, again.

~Skeeter The Lurker

Made me smile, reminded me of Lovecraft, and had Princess Luna in it. Have an upvote kind author.

3847755
I think that would make her heart explode.

No, Luna, you need to focus your new-found energies on making more powerful coffee. What could possibly go wrong?

3852512
RED BULL!
GIVES YOU WINGS!
EVEN IF YOU ALREADY HAVE EM!

as a Mormon I wouldn't drink coffe if my life depended on it:moustache:

Great story, tis worth many a laughs.

I know that feeling Luna. I too know what it's like to be the only person in town that hasn't had coffee.

3850447
Eventually goes to about x2.2 speed and repeats about 95 times. Because I'm like that.:twilightblush:

Dan

Coffee is good, but I refuse to believe Celly and Luna would willingly drink hot goat piss (aka. Starbucks).

3847706
:pinkiegasp:
Talk about eye candy.

Someone get Luna a French press for her birthday.

This Thor reference, I like it, ANOTHER!:yay:

Hmm.. Sounds a lot like me when I have to much caffeine....... I like it!

I've seen a person who drank a triple esspresso at 430 am and it scared me... I would be running and hiding if I had been in that cofee shop and saw Luna downing multiple shots.

Very zany story, well done and made me laugh. :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

Oh no, it's Too-much-coffee-Alicorn! (Guess who I'm referencing, kids.)
Luna's coffee-fueled rants remind me of Lewis Black's skit about the end of the universe being between two Starbucks facing each other in the same shopping plaza.
I like this bit of silliness, so it gets an upvote.

Starbucks... American coffee is extremely diluted. Tastes like hot water with a single drop of actual coffee. But I can't complain because I don't live there and it's my country's fault. The americans used to buy only brazillian coffee, and we decided to hold the coffee to increase the price. As a consequence, they had to drink a more diluted the coffee. They liked it, and decided to buy Colombian coffee which is more bland. They never went back to our coffee. Genius :facehoof:

In the end, I get my tasty coffee and you guys get your hot water and everyone is happy :twilightsmile:


3857291
Come over here and I'll show what real coffe tastes like. (do not interpret this in a sexual way)

Luna doesn't want the D.

That Luna was ridiculous and surreal and I love it. :rainbowlaugh:

Did Luna's decaf get served in an airlock because after the restriction to decaf she called Celestia a hard flank?

Luna rolled her eyes, “I never saw a need to,” she then flinched as she sat up, “Besides, and I am not one to follow fads.”

A lunar guard then wheeled in a massive crate that held golden scepters with Luna’s face on it, “Your shipment of-“

:rainbowlaugh:

3857279 Well first off America never bought coffee from just one place. In way of the quality of a cup of coffee in taste and flavor then you should try some of the African coffees. The Robusta beans are better tasting then the arabica beans that are mostly grown in central and south America. The best coffee that I have ever had though is Kona coffee. It is Robusta plants grown is a certain area of Hawaii in the volcanic soil. That stuff is completely smooth and will give you a buzz like you wouldn't believe. If though you prefer bitter acrid coffee then well enjoy.


The coffee facts and rant aside, this story is one of the best short (less the 10k) stories that I have read. I like what you did with the character of Luna by making a caffeine unstable version of her. Keep up the good work and I look forward to seeing your future works. Maybe Luna on an energy drink?

3859079
I didn't menat only, I meant mostly our coffee. Thanks for your suggestions, I'll try them out.

3859298 Kona has some great coffee, and some Ethiopian coffee is really good as well. (though a lot comes down to how they roast the coffee) So much good coffee so little time.

3853403 that explanses twilight:twilightoops:

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