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  • T Inscape

    When Twilight is taken by the Nightmare, it's up to Pinkie Pie to rescue her.
    29,301 words · 19,081 views  ·  2,177  ·  29
  • E Petriculture

    Twilight tries to figure out how rock farming works.
    6,716 words · 37,708 views  ·  2,764  ·  39
  • E Avocation

    Penumbra seeks gainful employment.
    4,557 words · 6,941 views  ·  1,201  ·  16
  • E π

    Trixie returns to Ponyville to challenge Twilight Sparkle. ("Magic Duel" as it occurs in the Petriculture AU.)
    13,511 words · 5,896 views  ·  860  ·  12
  • E Flash Fog

    Fluttershy must deal with an unusually thick fog as it approaches Ponyville.
    121,078 words · 13,736 views  ·  1,545  ·  28
  • T Pandelirium

    Celestia decides to attempt to reform Discord, so she taps a pony with a similar background for the job. ("Keep Calm and Flutter On" as it occurs in the Petriculture AU.)
    77,413 words · 11,128 views  ·  800  ·  14
  • E So, Just What Went Wrong, Anyway?

    Before Applejack's pep rally, Derpy was acting really weird... even for her. This is why.
    5,213 words · 3,319 views  ·  332  ·  5
  • E The Final Accusation: A Legal Comedy

    A dozen years after ascending to become an alicorn, Applejack rules on the case of Tiara v. FlimFlam
    21,338 words · 2,500 views  ·  354  ·  6

Blog Posts388

  • 1w, 9m
    Holy crap, I'm nearly done.

    I just finished making my initial outline for Chapter 50 of Flash Fog, and it occurred to me that I'm actually getting close to the end of the story. I've been writing this story for more than two years now, and I'm finally within sight of the finish line--in fact, at my current rate, there's a very good chance I'll finish sometime around Thanksgiving.

    (And to think I originally thought this story would be a 5,000-word oneshot...)

    4 comments · 131 views
  • 1w, 2d
    Flash Fog: Update

    Well, I have finished the draft of Chapter 49. I'm going to give my prereaders some time to look it over, and hopefully, I'll be posting it tomorrow.

    0 comments · 69 views
  • 1w, 3d

    There are a lot of really fun videos on YouTube featuring folks attempting to eat the traditional Swedish dish, surströmming. Surströmming is canned, fermented fish, usually eaten on some sort of flatbread with a name I can't remember at the moment. It is known for being very, very, very... er... pungent. Let's put it this way: people unfamiliar with the smell have been known to contact emergency services after encountering its distinct aroma (and as Dave Barry might say, I am not making this up).

    But you know what's more amusing than watching idiots deliberately subject themselves to surströmming? Watching naive fools accidentally subject themselves to it. In a small, enclosed space.

    Life is good.

    18 comments · 153 views
  • 1w, 4d

    Okay, so I just noticed that the number of views Pandelirium has received apparently spiked while I wasn't looking -- it's now the third most-viewed story in the Petriculture Cycle, despite being the last one. At first I figured that some of my readers decided to skip to the end, but when I looked at the total views for the first chapter (Chapter 10)* was still between 5,000 and 6,000, just where I remembered it being. It was only after going through each chapter that I realized that all of the new-found attention is focused squarely on Chapter 3, and I am extremely confused. Don't get me wrong, I love Chapter 3, and I'm very proud of it, but it has almost twice as many views as the story's initial chapter, and three times the views of the chapters that come before and after it.

    You'd think that there'd be something in the comments section that would explain this spike, but there haven't been any changes at all since I last remember. Clicking on the statistics tab shows nothing either, so if somebody influential in the brony community linked to that chapter, it wasn't from outside of FimFiction.net, but if it was on FimFiction, I'd think one of my readers would have let me know...

    Seriously, does anyone have any idea what's going on here?

    *To those of you who haven't read the story yet, Pandelirium's chapters are numbered in reverse order.

    12 comments · 302 views
  • 2w, 1d
    Prereader Conversation: Human Exploitation

    While working on the next chapter of Flash Fog:

    me 9:04 PM

    It's certainly something to think about.

    On a related note, I need to watch the Equestria Girls movies eventually.

    Cal Iaponia 9:04 PM

    maybe [REDACTED]


    me 9:04 PM

    If only because it turned out that both Lyra and Bon-Bon turned out to be right about [humans].

    Cal Iaponia 9:04 PM

    hoping someone puts up a good rip soon

    me 9:05 PM

    They are  very susceptible to magic, and they would make a formidable army for the invasion of Equestria.

    Cal Iaponia 9:05 PM

    we're also very good at exploiting things

    me 9:06 PM

    Basically, the first movie demonstrated that their ideas aren't mutually exclusive.

    Or at least, that's what the summaries seem to indicate.

    Cal Iaponia 9:08 PM

    two sides of the same coin

    probably why [Lyra and Bon-Bon] can still deal with each other

    5 comments · 226 views
  • ...

After reading a book by Spitfire's personal trainer, Rainbow Dash decides that the best way to get closer to her ultimate goal of joining the Wonderbolts is to add strength training to her practices by having one of her friends ride her. However, when she decides that Twilight Sparkle is just the mare for the job, the pegasus gets a bit more than she bargained for.

Artwork by Piggybank12.  Used with permission.  Thanks to DPV111 for assisting me with story planning.

First Published
15th Mar 2012
Last Modified
3rd Jun 2012
#1 · 135w, 4d ago · · · You Know It's Hard ·

sweet baby jesus more from kwakerjak. reads enthusiastically

#2 · 135w, 4d ago · · · You Know It's Hard ·

excellent chapter

#3 · 135w, 4d ago · · · You Know It's Hard ·

Very interesting, Eager to see where this leads. (Twidash? :twilightblush:)

#4 · 135w, 4d ago · · · You Know It's Hard ·

Well-written, wellcharacterized (is that a word?) and an interesting concept. Tracked.:rainbowkiss:

#5 · 135w, 4d ago · 1 · 3 · You Know It's Hard ·

No shipping tag? Shame.

Ahh well. Tracking this anyways, due to the great opening chapter. :D

#6 · 135w, 4d ago · · · You Know It's Hard ·

It may not be shipping but it is still Twilight and Dash in an awesome and cute concept.

Looking forward to more.

#7 · 135w, 4d ago · · · You Know It's Hard ·

That was really cute, and pretty interesting! Waiting eagerly for more. :twilightsmile:

#8 · 135w, 4d ago · · · You Know It's Hard ·

Gaps between paragraphs are a little too big, but story is to good to pay attention on it. Stalin loves "Slice of life" ficks, and this one is fine example.

Also, in Stalin's opinion, Twilight's color should not be described as violet, lavender is more accurate.

Overall: good job! Stalin eager for more.

#9 · 135w, 4d ago · · · You Know It's Hard ·

Interesting... Everything about the concept screams shipping, yet it's not tagged as such. Thankfully it also lacks dark and tragedy, so I don't think we'll be seeing Twi plummet to her death. It'll be fun to see where this goes.

#10 · 135w, 4d ago · · · You Know It's Hard ·


I suppose I should make this matter clear right now: No, I did not forget to add a shipping tag.

#11 · 135w, 4d ago · · · You Know It's Hard ·

Now this is interesting. Have a thumbs up and a track for a little motivation.

#12 · 135w, 4d ago · · · You Know It's Hard ·

>>326566 Haha, I didn't think so. I just find it's... An interesting start to a non-ship fic. Like I say, everything about it teases TwiDash, but it'll be neat to see this played out platonically.

#13 · 135w, 4d ago · · · You Know It's Hard ·

Tracking this. The characters feel well realized to me, it'd be clear who is speaking from their lines alone.

#14 · 135w, 3d ago · 1 · · You Know It's Hard ·


There is such a thing as "friendshipping" which is the deepening of a platonic relationship beyond what it is portrayed as in canon. However it involves no romantic aspects at all. Friendshipping fics are some of my favorites by far.

#15 · 135w, 3d ago · · · You Know It's Hard ·

Even without the shipping tag this is a great story so far with an equally great premise.

Equestrian activity in Equestria?! :rainbowlaugh:This is gonna be a "wild" ride indeed! :twilightsheepish:

#16 · 135w, 3d ago · · · You Know It's Hard ·

Very well written so far. I could imagine Rainbow being exactly like this. I like these sort of stories, because they don't set up huge character changing events that could conflict with the show or characters.:rainbowlaugh:

#17 · 135w, 3d ago · · · Drown in the Now ·


New Chapter!


And now is the part where I harshly edit you using lyrics.

""an quadruple"

"a" not "an"

""after all, maneuvers that were comparatively easy to pull off for fliers were likely .""

unfinished sentence.

"Rainbow Dash looked down at the ground for several second."

I'm MC Don't-Know-How-To-Pluralize-Word

I got so many rhyme and I sleep with all the girl

When there's more of one of something you're supposed to pluralize

But I never learned that throughout all the year I've been alive

This chapter was great. I wonder if this will lead up to an actual derby where Twi acts as Dash's jockey in a real race?:rainbowhuh:

#18 · 135w, 3d ago · · · Drown in the Now ·


Thanks.  I usually spot that sort of thing myself about an hour after posting, regardless of how much proofreading I've done.

#19 · 135w, 3d ago · · · Drown in the Now ·


Yup. I'm the same way.

#20 · 135w, 3d ago · · · Drown in the Now ·

At first I started this because the premise was interesting, now I'm genuinely hooked and left wanting for more. Good Job, you've successfully drawn me in to your story.:twilightsheepish:

#21 · 135w, 3d ago · · · Drown in the Now ·

>>331402 I see that happening a lot in the future.:pinkiehappy:

This story is so full of :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::pinkiegasp::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh: Thank-you, Thank-you!

Much muffins for you!:derpytongue2:

#22 · 135w, 2d ago · · · Drown in the Now ·

I can't wait for the future misinterpretations that I hope to see from the rest of the mane 6.

#23 · 135w, 2d ago · · · Drown in the Now ·

Twilight is such a boss. She reads books and trains the fasted pony in Equestria. I was thinking of a Dash fic where a new pony rivals Dash (it has probably been done:ajbemused:. This story here may inspire me to get on that, as i have not written anything here yet.

Thanks for the fun story so far.:twilightsmile:

#24 · 135w, 2d ago · · · Drown in the Now ·

A very nice chapter. I like the characterization of Dash, though Twilight still feels a bit off. But other than that, it's a good read so far. :pinkiesmile:

#25 · 135w, 4h ago · · · Drown in the Now ·

I'm not sure how Rainbow Dash has ailerons, but ... okay!

#26 · 135w, 4h ago · · · Drown in the Now ·


I couldn't think of what the equivalent of ailerons are on bird (and, by extension, pegasus) wings.  I eventually decided that it was better to use an existing term that might not have a reason to exist in Equestria than to make up my own term and bog down the narrative further with even more of my wordiness as I explained what I was talking about.

#27 · 135w, 4h ago · · · Drown in the Now ·


Fair enough! Birds don't need ailerons, because they can move their entire wings (one wing up and the other down) to make turns. I am a pilot, so I couldn't help but notice. Good story, by the way!

#28 · 135w, 3h ago · · · Drown in the Now ·

Very funny, I even know where your talking about, with those aerobatics, that is! Keep it up!


#29 · 135w, 2h ago · · · Drown in the Now ·

Very interesting. Tracked. Keep it up :pinkiehappy:

#30 · 135w, 2h ago · · · Drown in the Now ·


it was really fun to read.

But the last sentence is bugging me.

I do not think that Twilight would be so snippy and bossy towards Spike like that.

It was like: "Shut up slave. Back to work!"

Maybe something more like

"That's a secret *giggle*. Are all books shelved already?"

Overall definatly a like from me!

#31 · 135w, 1h ago · · · You Know It's Hard ·

"Greaves," not grieves.  Greaves are armor for your shins.  Grieving is what you do at a funeral.  At Twilight's funeral, in the hopefully unlikely event she plummets to her demise.  

This certainly promises to be an entertaining fic. :twilightsheepish:

#32 · 135w, 1h ago · · · You Know It's Hard ·


Thanks.  I thought it didn't look right, but Chrome's spellcheck doesn't recognize "greaves" as an actual word, so I got thrown off.

#33 · 135w, 1h ago · 1 · · Drown in the Now ·

Looks good for some friendshipping (can never have enough of that) consider me on board for the ride. Liking and tracking.

#34 · 135w, 1h ago · · · Drown in the Now ·

Fun story! Hope to see more of it soon :twilightsmile:

#35 · 135w, 1h ago · · · Drown in the Now ·

>>341979 You could simply call it a wing roll, or feather roll. Those have no flare, though. Just make up a Pegasus pony named Aileron something, and claim him to be the first pony to do one.

I really laughed at the portion about barrel rolls vs aileron rolls.

#37 · 134w, 6d ago · · · You Know It's Hard ·

Love the story so far :)

One thing I noticed was you said the word "sapient" which means human, and I think that you meant "sentient" which means intelligent. :twilightsmile: Keep up the good work, I love how Twi argues with Rainbow over the words!

#38 · 134w, 6d ago · · · Drown in the Now ·


This is the single most amazing comment I have ever read.  Bravo.

If this story does not spawn a thousand clopfics I will be shocked to my core.  Frankly, I half expect this to end up a clopfic.  I am as of yet undecided as to how I would take such a development.

#39 · 134w, 6d ago · · · Drown in the Now ·


Unlikely to get cloppy since it's on EqD now. It would need 2 versions to not be taken down.

Also if you liked those lyrics, here's a PMV of the song they're from. http://youtu.be/aAhthA8QFew

#40 · 134w, 6d ago · · · You Know It's Hard ·

>>343895 Incorrect, Sapient means having complex emotions. Gorillas for example are sapient as they can form complex emotional bonds. Crows are not sapient as they don't have anything close to emotions beyond 'hungry' 'sex' and 'danger'. Both are sentient however, as both can solve puzzles that require lateral thinking.

#41 · 134w, 6d ago · · · Drown in the Now ·


I had the same problem in one of my stories and eventually came to the same conclusion and just gave up and used "aileron roll". Clearly, someone needs to write about Aileron and his/her groundbreaking work in pegasus aerobatics.

Anyway, fun stuff so far!

#42 · 134w, 6d ago · · · Drown in the Now ·

>>341979 Hmm, adjusting the tilt of your wings might have the same general effect. A barrel roll involves stiff wings, while the other involves tilting your wings to gain air-pressure assistance.

#43 · 134w, 5d ago · · · Drown in the Now ·

That was awesome. I'm looking forward the next chapters :twilightsmile:

#44 · 134w, 5d ago · · · You Know It's Hard ·


Actually Whiteeyes you have it the wrong way around. Sapient refers to being wise, its second meaning referring to being human, as in "homosapien". Sentient refers to feelings and self awareness. One of the big tests for sentience is the mirror test. An animal is considered sentient if it can recognize itself as the one in the mirror.

#45 · 134w, 5d ago · · · Drown in the Now ·

Very nice writing. Tracking this.

#46 · 134w, 5d ago · · · You Know It's Hard ·

*Rainbow Dash struggles to get the request out, Twilight cocks her head in confusion as RD stutters.  Finally, the words break loose and tumble from RD's mouth in a rapid jumble which managed to create the most awkward sentence possible*  Twilight, I need you to ride me right now!  :rainbowderp:

*Twilight WHUAAAA!!!*  :twilightoops:

#47 · 134w, 5d ago · · · Drown in the Now ·

*Alondro detects trolling potential!  He acts!*

“What was that all about?” came Spike’s voice from upstairs.

Twilight glared at her assistant.  “It’s none of your business, Spike.  I'm just going to be riding Rainbow Dash a couple days a week from now on!   Turns out riding a pegasus mare that much is very tiring work!  Now quit eavesdropping and get back to sorting those books!”

Spike:  O_____________o  

#48 · 134w, 1d ago · · · Busy Child ·

This is definitely one of my new favorite story's due to its execution and unique idea.


#49 · 134w, 1d ago · · · Busy Child ·

Yes! Can't wait till the next chapter! :rainbowkiss:

I wonder what the Dash has in mind?

#50 · 134w, 1d ago · · 2 · Busy Child ·

Wow. That is a LOT of technical info. Points for doing your research, but you might not want to show it off this prominently. People generally don't come here to learn, so being bombarded with so much info might rub them the wrong way.

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