Based on the comic by matrix541: Upon being humilated in Ponyville, Trixie remembers how she once was the happiest unicorn in Equestria and how it all came apart...
(One of my earlier fanfics, now on Fimfiction)
Comic: http://matrix541.deviantart.com/art/Trixie-s-Story-258755970
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*slowclap*
Love it
Very nice! Certainly tugged at the heart-strings. c:
Though there were quite a few grammar mistakes in here, I was able
to ignore them simple because the essence of the story was sad enough for
me to just let it go.
I mean, they weren't horrendous or anything.
Great job!
Hooo, splendidly done and I like that she was still stubborn in the end even if she had what she really wanted right in front of her. And her response being so abrasive too, brushing the princess off because if Twilight could do that on her own then by gummit so should she! Ahh, tis the start of a beautiful and eternal rivalry. Vegeta and Goku. Ranma and Ryouga! Edison and Tesla! Elwin and Lans! Stella and Henrika! Raistlin and Everybody! Ash and Gary! Sub-Zero and Scorpion! Roy Horn and Rick Thomas! And now Twilight and Trixie.
That was a very good story. It had many good references, and it made sense. I wouldn't say I cried, but I did get emotionally sad. Keep on creating stories like these.
suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/17611378/images/1327107604040.gif
I think this needs another round of applause.
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There. Man this really is a fantastic story... touching and not as controversial as you'd expect. It makes sense, and that is what surprised me. Congratulations on the fantastic sotry... too bad Trixie couldn't return to Celestia. Imagine the change if she had come to Twilight later when it was HER turn to learn about friendship...
Very nice. I really sympathized with Trixie, even though all her misery is largely self-inflicted.
One small complaint: given that Celestia lost her sister to jealousy, I would think she would have handled the situation a bit better.
Still, other than that, it was great.
671282
Thanks for all your comments so far. You gonna update soon? I'm really excited for the next one.
Awesome!!!
She poked herself with her horn
Was at Ponyville, saw the whole thing
Didn't stop Ursa from destroying all of Trixie's possessions
my friend, you are my hero. this is an absolutely perfectly crafted story. well done.
Lovely story.
Excellent work. It was a lovely little story.
As you repeatedly refer in the description and story to the comic, is there any chance you might be able to provide a link to it, in description or in the story?
2393161
It's up there now: http://matrix541.deviantart.com/art/Trixie-s-Story-258755970
This seems good..... Wanting to read
TACTICAL FEELS, INCOMING D:
This was probably asked for but is there a sequel, or could your write a sequl that touch bases with what happened on the journy to make her feel that she needed the amulet, and whst nont
3683304
I keep an open mind about such a thing, but no ideas so far, sorry
That was an awesome backstory, the only thing is I didn't really like how Celestia reacted to some things, like the things she said. Like when she called Trixie a 'spoiled brat'... This is Celestia, the ruler of Equestria, the queen of Justice. She wouldn't have said 'spoiled brat' like she was a normal mom talking to her teenage daughter. It would've been more of her character to just say 'I can't believe your acting like this!'.
And in the end when she said 'No one can become great on their own.' I didn't get it. I totally understood what Trixie meant with what she said, that she got to where she is on her own, and she would be even better if she became amazing all by herself. It's just like if you have two artists who are equally good at drawing, but one learned how to draw from many lessons and being taught, while the other became this talented from being self-taught and from pure talent. You'd think the second artist was better right? Because they didn't need to learn and practice, they just knew how to do it by themselves. Trixie wanted to do this on her own, she wanted to have something to be proud of herself for. So it didn't make sense when Celestia said 'No one can be great on their own.' That's not true at all! It's an awesome thing to become great and talented at something all by yourself. To get all the credit for something you did. I just, didn't like it.
But other than that, this was great. I absolutely love your backstories, you take these undeveloped characters and give them some of the best backstories and amazing character development. Now Trixie's not just a random jerk who's mean because she just is, she's a jerk because she was betrayed by the only pony she held dear and replaced by someone else. Then you feel bad for her, and she becomes a way more interesting character! You have a gift with writing.
The great and powerful Trixie gets all the great and powerful feels
Yeah, Celestia handled... Well, all of that horribly.
You'd think she'd never dealt with actual ponies before. It really smacks of 'Huh. I'm used to being a goddess. I... Don't actually know what to do when someone calls me out on something legitimate.'
which is it? Ms. Gentlehoof or Ms. Gentlehop?
This should be Trixie took a deep breath before closing her eyes, her horn glowing as the judges started taking notes.
This should be Walking towards her was none other than the ruler of Equestria, Princess Celestia.
This should be The fact that the most powerful magic user in Equestria was complimenting her or the fact that she was even talking to her in the first place. The reason for this change lies in the definition of the root word of the two words.
means add to (something) in a way that enhances or improves it; make perfect.
means politely congratulate or praise (someone) for something.
This should either be To this day, she still remembered her first night at the castle...
or To this day, she could still remember her first night at the castle...
because the word remembered is the past tense form of the word remember
This should either be It had been a few days since Trixie passed the entrance exam and she still couldn't believe what was happening.
or it should be It had already been a few days since Trixie passed the entrance exam and she still couldn't believe what was happening.
this should be Taught by none other than the princess herself while also living in the grand palace.
the word over looking is, you guessed it, one word.
This should be "You've already given me more than enough. I don't know how to repay you."
The word Equestira in that sentence is actually spelled Equestria. The same goes for any and all other examples of said word.
There needs to be a space in between the comma and the first quotation mark.
This is one of those stories that piss me off a lot.
I'm not exactly disappointed by it, but i really enjoyed it. I really don't even know what to say about it.
Truly an epic back story given to her
One thing I like especially is how we can almost conclude that Celestia is the one who made a mistake her
Showing further she may not be entirely perfect as her immortal essence seems to be
Where there are always some that shine brighter
There are always, faster - more unique stars shooting by
Often unnoticed due to their distance and speed
But it does not make them any less powerful and great
I was hoping this wouldn't make me cry.
Arg stories like this make me wish it was cannon.
A great story. Fitting especially with the similarities to Sunset Shimmer's backstory.