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More Stories10

  • E Purity

    Change is never easy. Even more when some ponies want you dead.
    36,994 words · 4,863 views  ·  621  ·  13
  • E Never Judge A Book By Its Cover

    A filly Earth Pony has a cutie mark related to magic. Is pony society ready for her?
    10,642 words · 4,347 views  ·  610  ·  17
  • E QQ More

    What you think is evil, may not always be. A different point of view can make all the difference.
    2,977 words · 2,086 views  ·  120  ·  3
  • E Of Apples and Diamonds

    Rarity was saved by a knight, the one she deserved, not the one she wished for.
    9,731 words · 2,526 views  ·  155  ·  6
  • E Fighting Destiny

    Destiny is calling for the death of the four Princesses, but one filly plans on making sure the message doesn’t reach its destination.
    5,471 words · 501 views  ·  80  ·  3
  • E No Pinkie

    Twilight chose the sad Pinkie for a reason
    1,178 words · 971 views  ·  31  ·  0
  • E Luna Discovers Italian Food

    The crust have been doubled!
    2,812 words · 1,423 views  ·  79  ·  5
  • E Resignation

    Why one would give up so much
    1,060 words · 492 views  ·  32  ·  1

Blog Posts34

  • 51w, 4d
    4 and 50th

    I just came out of a viewing, in a movie theater, of the 50th Anniversary of Doctor Who. Which makes for quite the weekend with the premier of Season 4.

    Just to put thing in context, I've often been told that I critic thing too much. However, it's who I am; I'm harsh. However, I'm even harsher against myself, if it means anything. I don't critic to put something down, I do it because I want it to be better. I also never critic anything unless I got ideas on how to improve it. It's part of my professional job; I fix problem, and where there is no known problem, I discover some nobody thought existed and fix them. I just have to improve the way I bring those critics. :)

    Also, I would like to express an opinion I have; writing and story-telling skills are totally different, but are related to each other when building a story. A good writer may be a terrible story-teller and vise versa.

    Writing is the ability to build coherent sentences and use proper words. Bad writing skill - like mine - will give imprecise ideas, and will make the reader wonder what the author really meant. It may even convey the totally wrong concept; the author think something and every reader understand something else.

    Story-telling is the ability to build characters, world and events that are interesting and compelling. A bad story-teller will have plot holes, deus ex machina and all kind of errors or incoherency in his story flow. His characters won't be interesting, be impossible to relate to, and will take action that doesn't make sense. Lot of questions would be left unanswered because the author simply doesn't know himself. Most importantly, a good teller will be consistent in his world building and will plan ahead everything.

    About the Doctor Who 50th special, it's the first time in a really long time that I came out from watching a movie or a TV show without having anything in mind about what I would remove, add or change to improve it.

    About the Season 4 premiere... I believe MLP's writers are may be great writers... but horrible story-teller. The list of thing I would have modified in the premier is long! The same way writing and story-telling, for me, is two different thing, this episode was, again for me, good, but the story was bad. I'm not a good writer, I know that much, but is it such really egoistical to think I could do a better world-building job than them? I know very well I would be terrible at making slice-of-life episodes. I know myself enough for that. However, their world-building is lacking the coherence, flow and answers that I enjoy in universe like Doctor Who.

    And that's the whole issue here. It feels like the MLP writers want to push the series to the next step - and that very commendable - and make something bigger, but it also feels like they don't have the structure or the experience at making that kind of stories. Do they have a bible that answers question like;

    - Who wrote the 1000 years prophecy?

    - Why Celestia believed so much in Twilight in Season 1? Blind faith doesn't suit such an experienced ruler.

    - How did she know Twilight would make five friends with exactly the proper attributes to active the Elements?

    - Why Celestia left the Elements in the old castle when she built new Canterlot?

    - Why Celestia/Luna didn't bring the Elements back to the tree after sealing Discord?

    - Why Celestia was unable to "cleanse" Luna like the Mane 6 did?

    - Why Princess Cadance foalsit a common unicorn with no cutie mark?

    - If Celestia was able to use the Elements alone, why they needed to be six ponies in the present?

    - Was the changelings really that dumb? How could they feed love off frightened ponies?


    and many more questions. If they cannot answer them right now, for me, it's a huge flaw in their story coherence. I never start writing a story without knowing everything about it, otherwise it becomes very hard later to fix the holes left behind.

    If I didn't like my job so much, I would maybe try to find how to become a professional story writer for TV shows or movies. I would probably fail, mind you... heh.

    8 comments · 105 views
  • 53w, 13h
    Correction of previous stories...

    Nobody will probably noticed it, but the first chapter of Never Judge A Book By Its Cover passed from 1400 words to over 2000. On top, it should now be relatively error free.

    Huge thanks to Web of Hope, Shutaro and Dusk Watch for doing a blitz of correction in that old story.

    3 comments · 81 views
  • 57w, 5d
    Purity's sequel

    I don't think there's any good way to tell people who favorite a story that a sequel have been released.

    Would be nice to have a way to link stories, chain them if you will. I almost missed sequel to story I favorited, and I'm sure I probably missed some too!

    Anyway, here's the story following Purity; Fighting Destiny.

    1 comments · 94 views
  • 58w, 2d
    Fighting Destiny's cover

    1 comments · 89 views
  • 58w, 5d
    Hasbrony, Mother of all Drama!

    6 comments · 103 views
  • ...

Once Celestia is back to Canterlot, after being released by Discord's vines, she summons him for some explanations. What exactly happened? What did Twilight see? Wait... Alicorn magic?

Editing and pre-reading by: Web of Hope, shutaro and Dusk Watch

First Published
22nd Dec 2013
Last Modified
22nd Dec 2013
#1 · 47w, 6d ago · · ·

I took a moment off the story I'm currently writing (Fighting Destiny) to write this short one-shot.

Basically, the first two episodes of season 4 somewhat managed to mess that story, and another one I'm planning.

I truly believe that showing us the fight between Celestia and Luna was a stupid move, a meaningless fan-service. Even more considering it was resolved so quickly and in such an underwhelming way. They could have made a whole episode with that part alone!

Let's say I'm not trying to go against official canon... just bending it a bit. :trollestia:

(And I get to play with Discord, which is always challenging, but fun.)

#2 · 47w, 6d ago · · ·

You have finally given me a good excuse to pretend that fight wasn't what actually happened, and thrown in an explanation for Alicorn magic being dark magic to boot. :pinkiehappy:

#3 · 47w, 6d ago · · ·

>>3665522 My pleasure. :twilightsmile:

After all, any time Discord is around, how can you be sure of what's really happening? :trollestia:

#4 · 47w, 6d ago · · ·

overall, an unnecessary adjustment of what happened in  the show

#5 · 47w, 6d ago · · ·

>>3665543 For most people, I admit it's not necessary. However, like I said, I got two stories in writing that depend on that fight not being resolved in 4 minutes flat.

#6 · 47w, 6d ago · · ·

I wholeheartedly endorse cannon bending when questionable deus ex machinas are involved. Then again if I didn't I would be a hypocrite, so there's that.

#7 · 47w, 6d ago · · ·

She was relieved to know that the timeline, for now at least, was safe. On the other hoof, she was slightly disappointed to learn that her student would still have to perform such a dreaded task. The future was still set in motion.


“So?” Discord answered back. “I gave little Twilight the official version of the events, the one written in history books, the one that only involves you and Luna and is resolved in a few minutes.”

Sugarcoated history is useless history. It wronges the memory to the victims, and prevents to learn from the past mistakes.

Comment posted by Raistlin deleted at 6:31pm on the 22nd of December, 2013
#9 · 47w, 6d ago · · ·

Who was Celestia talking about? This overseer of time or is that spoiling a future ep?

Though I have to agree that the scene with NMM n Celestia in the season premiere didn't do it justice, it could have used more dialogue.

#10 · 47w, 6d ago · · ·

>>3666691 Frankly, it's a character I'm thinking about building. We know that talented unicorn can time travel, and we know Discord is most likely able too. So, something - or someone - is preventing him from messing with the history. I mean, the most logical thing he would do once released from the stone, is to jump back to prevent it from happening, but he didn't. Hell, could you imagine someone focused on bringing the most chaos possible with the ability to time travel?

Like I said, I got two stories that relied on the fact that the fight between NMM and Celestia didn't last 4 mins. Fighting Destiny, which the next chapter should explain why I wrote this small one shot, and another I didn't start writing yet.

#11 · 47w, 6d ago · · ·

>>3666128 Unless there's reason for the past mistakes to remain hidden from the history books. But... what could that be? :trollestia:

As for the sequel, it will come. I got so many ideas for stories... And so little time. And so much procrastination!

#12 · 47w, 5d ago · · ·

>>3667866 Cool can't wait :twilightsmile::heart:

#13 · 43w, 4d ago · · ·

Oh you naughty devil, hinting at so much in a oneshot. :duck:

She would the first to admit it had been a painful experience,
"would be the first," though I'm not sure what this has to do with the rest of the sentence.

Celestia wasn’t surprised the slightest to see the silverwares had a life on its own.
Celestia wasn't surprised in the slightest to see the silverware had a life of its own. (Silverware refers to the set as a whole.)

#14 · 43w, 4d ago · · ·


Yeah! Only 2 mistakes! :pinkiehappy:

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