• Published 4th Dec 2013
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Appledashery - Just Essay



Rainbow Dash lives an exciting life and is swiftly becoming the most daring, awesome pegasus in all of Equestria. She would gladly give it all up, though, just to confess her love to Applejack.

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Round Robin

"And that's when Rarity basically just told me to my face that I'm an introvert!" Rainbow sputtered, pacing across the foyer to Fluttershy's cottage. "I mean, I dig the mare and all... but can you believe that? An introvert?"

"Uhhhhhhhmmm..." Fluttershy squirmed where she sat.

Rainbow spun to face her, blinking. "Are you for reals? You agree with that?"

"You've... always have been very... very selective when it came to choosing friends, Rainbow Dash," Fluttershy said.

"I had you as a friend throughout most of my foalhood, didn't I?"

"Well—"

"And we hung out tons! Tons, Fluttershy!"

"Mmmm... indeed." Fluttershy nodded. "And who else did we hang out with?"

Rainbow Dash opened her muzzle... but had nothing to say.

"Did you even show up when I was with my other friends at the time?"

Rainbow Dash winced. "You... you had other friends...?"

"Why, yes, Rainbow," Fluttershy said. "From my neighboring cloud, remember? Wing Singer? Comet Glide? Aerial?"

"But... but..." Rainbow gulped. "You were so... so shy at the time."

"Well, yes." Fluttershy nodded. "But I didn't have to talk much to hang out with them. They knew I was very nervous... fearful, even, and yet they allowed me to follow them around as they played games among the clouds. Of course, whenever they flapped their wings, I stayed behind at home. But still..." A dreamy sigh. "It was like... nice practice for when the day would come that I'd really be social. I knew that I wanted to have friends, but I just didn't know how to go about doing it... or talking to them for that matter." She giggled. "And as nice as my neighbors were, none of them ever defended me from a bunch of bullies."

"Fluttershy..."

"Or hugged me close and promised to protect me forever..." Fluttershy's eyes twinkled. "With loyalty and love—"

"Have I really... really been a loner all this time?" She gulped. "I mean... in Ponyville—heck—even back in Cloudsdale I was showing off all the time! Shouting and grabbing ponies' attention like I was using a megaphone to show off my awesomeness!"

"Rainbow Dash, you can enjoy drawing a crowd and still feel uncomfortable around company."

Rainbow Dash blinked at that.

"You had lots of ponies who admired you... who wanted to be you, Rainbow Dash," Fluttershy said. "But you only ever hung out with one pony." She blushed slightly. "Even at the time, I thought it was precious. You reserved your sincerest feelings and loyalties for one soul and one soul alone. It felt like being a friend to me took work, and I cherished you for it. That's why... that's why I hated myself so terribly for... for rejecting you." She gulped. "But I also knew th-that leading you on would only break your fragile... fragile heart..."

Rainbow shuddered. "You didn't need any help in doing that..."

"Well, looking back at that, I now realize what you mean," Fluttershy said. "Once you stopped hanging out with me, you immediately started hanging out with Listing. And after you cut yourself off from Listing, you spent almost all of your time with Gilda."

"Just moving from one 'happy' place to another," Rainbow muttered.

"But you did change, Rainobw," Fluttershy said. "You found company in... you know... your other friends. The ones from the music club you frequented?" She smiled. "Lyra Heartstrings... Bon Bon... Vinyl Scratch and Caramel—"

"Drinking buddies."

"Huh?"

"Drinking buddies, Fluttershy," Rainbow grunted. "Let's face it. That's all they are." A sigh. She stared forlornly at the floor. "That's all they've ever been."

"But they still filled a special niche in your heart."

"Only through means of convenience." Rainbow Dash rubbed her forehead. "Nnngh... even today... I only show up to hound them over... one stupid issue or another."

"And if they weren't happy to oblige with your troubles, then I'm certain they would say something."

"Rarity was right, I do like being alone a lot."

"Oh Rainbow Dash..." Fluttershy shook her head with a tender gaze. "That's not what she meant at all. I'm sure of it."

"But it's the truth, isn't it?" Rainbow frowned. "All I ever do in life is fly circles on my lonesome, trying to do stuff the hard way... my way." She gulped. "As if I'm challenging myself to endure longer and longer bouts of emptiness."

"You're here right now, aren't you?" Fluttershy said. "In my cottage? Talking to me? Asking for advice?" A wink. "If you ask me, I'd say you're trying to challenge yourself in another direction altogether."

"Yeah well, what's too little too late, huh?" Rainbow blinked. "You said it yourself. I like hopping from one friend to another. And that's using the word 'friend' lightly." She winced. "What if... what if all this time..." She clenched her eyes shut, sighing. "...Applejack has only been the next Gilda or Listing?"

"That's not even close to being true, Rainbow..."

"Yeah, and I can tell you why, Fluttershy." Her eyes reopened, soft and moist. "It's because I haven't bothered to break the mold and be open to her." A sniffle. "With all of my feelings exposed."

"Well, you've been burned before. Especially by Listing—"

"A lot of time has passed since then, Fluttershy."

"Well, we've broached this situation before, Rainbow Dash." Fluttershy narrowed. "And I thought you had taken the big step that you needed to."

Rainbow hung her head, shuffling slightly.

"Unless... unless now you're here to... resolve yourself to being Applejack's friend."

Rainbow Dash gulped. "Shouldn't I?"

"Is that what your heart desires, Rainbow?"

"Of course my heart desires more, Fluttershy." Rainbow looked up. "But that's not the point. I need to be better than that to Applejack... to all of my friends." She leaned forward. "I gotta start treating Applejack like she treats me."

"With love and respect?"

"With a different kind of love and respect. Then I can have the groundwork to... to..." Rainbow Dash bit her lip. "...to not go friggin' crazy if or when I gotta make the jump again." She shook her head. "I almost lost you once, Fluttershy. I... I-I don't want to lose you again." A sigh. "Or Applejack... or the others."

Fluttershy nodded. "I think I understand now, Rainbow Dash." A smile. "And I think I have an idea that can help us get on the right track."

"Huh...? What's that?"

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