Appledashery

by Just Essay

Loyalty's Last Leg

"Whew!" Lancie held onto Rainbow's saddlebag for dear life. "Who invited the Squirreltrooper Convention?" He blinked, then pointed at the pegasus. "Oh. Right. It was you." He pumped a granite fist. "Semper Forage! Hahahahaha—whoah!"

Rainbow suddenly galloped straight out into the fray, darting left and right in a desperate zig zag. She sprinted deep into the courtyard, leaping over fallen dragon bodies, dodging streams of bullets, and narrowly dodging the random screaming squirrel or diamond dog.

"Okay, Sparky... I know you're taking your sweet-flank time... beating around the bush to get to Princess Frecklestan and all..." He grunted, climbing his way up her mane so that he could scream into her fuzzy ears: "But have you lost your fruit-punch-flavored mind?!"

"Look!" Rainbow panted, dodging and dashing. "I just gotta do a quick little something! That's all!"

Lancie ducked as a random henchstallion flew overhead, performing the Whinnyhelm scream. "Does it have to involve diving tonsils-deep into the Kaizopocalypse?"

"What are you afraid of, huh?" Rainbow grinned—then grunted as she had to side-step out of the way from burning plumes of flame and catapult projectiles. "You're made of stone! You can survive this!"

"Well maybe that's not what I'm concerned about!" Lancie snarled. "You ever think of that?"

"Then what's the big deal?"

"I... uhm... erm..." Lancie gulped, shook his head, and pointed towards an incoming shadow. "Dragon butt."

"Gaah!" Rainbow propelled herself with her wings, diving out of the way—

SMASSSH! An enormous dragon draped across the center of the courtyard, spilling chunks of mortar and brick. With an obese grunt, a frazzled Don Canter in a torn suit landed on top of his belly. P-Pow! He fired a sawed-off shotgun into the dragon's chin and spat on the charred scales. "Hmmmfff! Reject my offer, will ya?" He turned—and his head jerked upon seeing Rainbow Dash.

"Okay, show's over, Sparky." Lancie tugged and tugged at her neck. "Get up. Get up!"

"Gnnngh..." Rainbow winced, flexing her numb, tingling limbs. "I'm... trying..."

"You!" Ch-Chtung! He cocked his shotgun and aimed it down at the mare, smoking angry rings into the burning night sky. His voice growled over the angry melee churning all around them. "Either you're... A... the dumbest broad I ever met... or B... some psycho bimbo I shoulda hired months ago instead of that spruced-up one-eyed chicken."

"Uhhhhh..." Rainbow winced as a shrieking diamond dog on fire ran past her. "...can I take the physical challenge?"

"I'll tell ya what ya can take!" Don Canter aimed down the sights of his boomstick, directly at her. "You can take a healthy dose of burning lead straight up your lov—"

CHOMP! A dragon bit savagely over the fat pony's body and shook the carcass left and right. A half-dozen squirrels pounced on the beast and rolled them over into a diamond dog mine... where they all promptly exploded.

Rainbow Dash shielded herself from the burning strips of scale and bushy tail. She blinked into the resulting plume and ash. "Well." She blinked. "That works too."

Lancie gulped. "Mark Summares, eat your heart out."

"There!" Rainbow suddenly gasped, pointing to the far side of the deadly arena.

"What's so special about there?" Lancie sputtered. "Other than the fact that it's slightly not here?"

"Just hang on!" Rainbow Dash got back up on all fours—limped slightly—but steadied her atrophying limbs with flapping wings. "I just gotta grab one before they all bite the dust?"

"One what?"

"Oh no..." Rainbow grimaced, watching as Top Dog and three other diamond dogs twirled spears, shoving a large broodling towards her destination. Her eyes focused on the glint of several ruby teleportation stones that she had stealthily placed there several minutes earlier. "Come on... come on..."

Top Dog let out a howl. He thrusted forward, shoving the blade of his spear deep into the dragon's chest. The broodling let out a pained roar and teetered backwards, his shadow covering the gems.

"Come on come on come on come on!" Rainbow hissed, flying forward.

"Hate to break it to ya, Sparky!" Lancie clung tightly, wincing from the shadow. "But it's about to be Butt O'Clock!"

Swoooosh! Rainbow flew under the collapsing dragon and—

THUDDDD!

—she rolled to a clumsy stop along the other side. Her body tumbled against a stone partition, where she found herself breathlessly clutching an enchanted ruby to her chest. Sweating, she looked over.

The bloodied dragon's body had crushed the rest of the teleportation stones to dust.

"Whew..." Rainbow stood up. "That was close." She flinched, dodging bursts of flame and gunshots as she slinked away from the nonstop fight scene. "Gotta carry this off."

"To where?" Lancie sputtered. "Whom?"

"Just keep your eye out for bacon!" Rainbow barked, breaking into a three-legged gallop. "I swear, while loyalty still beats within my bosom."

"Snkkkt—heeheehee!"

Rainbow frowned. "What's so funny?"

"Hahaha—you said 'bosom.'"

"Yeah..." Rainbow glanced sideways at the explosions and devastation. "...guess there's always one in the crowd."

Comments

[RoboRed]

CHOMP! A dragon bit savagely over the fat pony's body and shook the carcass left and right. A half-dozen squirrels pounced on the beast and rolled them over into a diamond dog mine... where they all promptly exploded.

Rainbow Dash shielded herself from the burning strips of scale and bushy tail. She blinked into the resulting plume and ash. "Well." She blinked. "That works too."

...Yeah, that was pretty much my same reaction. Along with varying degrees of "wat".

[Phoenix Kitten]

"Well maybe that's not what I'm concerned about!" Lancie snarled. "You ever think of that?"

Awww. he does care.

"Just keep your eye out for bacon!" Rainbow barked, breaking into a three-legged gallop.

Yeah... okay Dash... so uhh.. what if Sunset doesn't want to help you after what you just did?

the Whinnyhelm scream

fing...really?

So Canter's dead... that's A threat taken care of. Maybe stick around and to make sure the dipshit duo, Top Dog and Beakface bite it too?

Maybe... just a suggestion.

[Lightning Bearer]

2.media.collegehumor.cvcdn.com/68/71/43b6a45f908c65b2dabb1c41b506f82f.jpg

[Sharp Quill]

Lancie ducked as a random henchstallion flew overhead, performing the Whinnyhelm scream.

[youtube=cdbYsoEasio]

[Tim the Planes-pony]

Soooo... that happened.

[Appledash_Gurl]

Ya know, it would really suck if all of this was just a dream, or maybe this is all in the arc with Epcot....but nah that would suck.

Thats it, have a nice day!

=^-^=

[Leftover of Saikano]

CHOMP! A dragon bit savagely over the fat pony's body and shook the carcass left and right. A half-dozen squirrels pounced on the beast and rolled them over into a diamond dog mine... where they all promptly exploded.

Is this what I expected when I started reading a story about an ill Rainbow Dash secretly in love with Applejack? Doesn't matter, I like it.

[Scohinyha Sanka]

Just another day at the office.

[Sabin]

"I'll tell ya what ya can take!" Don Canter aimed down the sights of his boomstick, directly at her. "You can take a healthy dose of burning lead straight up your lov—"
CHOMP! A dragon bit savagely over the fat pony's body and shook the carcass left and right.

and nothing of value was lost

[zaponator]

I knew shit was gonna hit the fan, but I was not anticipating this level of straight-up death.

Also:

"What are you afraid of, huh?" Rainbow grinned—then grunted as she had to side-step out of the way from burning plumes of flame and catapult projectiles. "You're made of stone! You can survive this!"

"Well maybe that's not what I'm concerned about!" Lancie snarled. "You ever think of that?"

D'awww!

[BabySkittleMonster]

Well. That escalated quickly.

[LucyHorseThing]

"I'll tell ya what ya can take!" Don Canter aimed down the sights of his boomstick, directly at her. "You can take a healthy dose of burning lead straight up your lov—"

CHOMP! A dragon bit savagely over the fat pony's body and shook the carcass left and right. A half-dozen squirrels pounced on the beast and rolled them over into a diamond dog mine... where they all promptly exploded.

Those are embarrassing last words.

[DrEggnog]

This is exactly what I wanted.

[arancaytar]

CHOMP!

Hot damn.

In all of Appledashery and Austraeoh, I don't think we've ever seen an antagonist taken out this quickly and non-chalantly before.

What was "lov-"? "Lovely"?

[DIRKWITHAGUN]

"I'll tell ya what ya can take!" Don Canter aimed down the sights of his boomstick, directly at her. "You can take a healthy dose of burning lead straight up your lov—"

CHOMP! A dragon bit savagely over the fat pony's body and shook the carcass left and right. [...]

colour me crazy... but i feel like there's some rwby in here.