Rainbow Dash lives an exciting life and is swiftly becoming the most daring, awesome pegasus in all of Equestria. She would gladly give it all up, though, just to confess her love to Applejack.
Rainbow Dash and Lancie hid in the hovel of the toppeled building's foundation, their ears craned to the air outside. As the minute limped on, the leather flapping of wings grew closer... and closer. Soon, the noise was thunderous in its proximity. After a brief pause, the ground shook from the impact of more than one set of claws.
Rainbow gnashed her teeth. "You've got to be friggin' kidding me..."
"With our luck," Lancie mused, "We probably stumbled upon their squatting grounds."
"Shhhhh!" Rainbow's eyes narrowed. Her ear tickled, for she heard several bass voices reverberating through the shattered framework of the building. It occurred to her that whatever was outside was having a conversation. So, signaling for Lancie to "be quiet," the pegasus boldly crept out from her little niche and crawled to the very edge of the enclosure. She pressed her back to a wall, then craned her neck far enough for her ear to bear witness to the full brunt of booming voices:
"....expect from us! We've searched and searched every inch of the land of morsels! What chances do we even have of finding anything here?!"
"If Big Boss wants us to search the blasted lands as well as the unblasted, then that is his choice."
"And it's a stupid choice, can't you see?! Can't anyone see?!"
Stomping limbs. Claw scrapes. A scaled tail dragged past Rainbow's immediate view, making her shiver.
"Are you questioning the Big Boss' authority, whelp?!
"Yeah? And what of it?! You're no stranger to griping behind his back!"
"I'm older than you. I get to gripe."
"Hah! Makes no difference in the long run! It's still his brood! Don't pretend you're not nearly as frustrated as I am!"
"Rrrrrgh... it is as mother willed. We both know this. And besides, it's not as though Aatxe is leading us to ruin."
The air heated up with a flamed roar.
"Raaaaaaugh! But where's the glory, brother?! All Aatxe has done since he's become Big Boss is lead us on search after search for nothing!"
"Only because we've found nothing!"
"Hah! It pains me to hear how easily you've let him pile guilt on top of you! Just like mother did!"
Razor sharp claws sang through the air. Rainbow and Lancie winced as a loud thud echoed across the building, causing several steel beams to pop loose. The pegasus and the statue flinched, expecting the building to implode on top of them. Thankfully, everything stayed intact... but barely.
"You can question Aatxe's wisdom! But never mother's!" shouted the deeper of the two draconian voices. The air heated, heated, and cooled. "She gave everything for the brood, and if she wishes for Aatxe to be Big Boss, then so be it! Who cares if he's obsessed with a bunch of useless rocks! If finding them makes him happy, then we are doing Mother's will!"
"Hrmmmff... very well, I shall continue searching. But I do this to appease you, brother, not Aatxe. You must know... the other brood members fell the same way."
"Then if they respect me, they will follow my example and resume the search. From now on, no more wasting time. There are countless more acres of the blasted lands to scour."
"Even if we've flown all of these skies already?"
"Mrmmmfff... less complaining, more scanning." Thunderous wings flapped in the air. "There is nothing but metal scrap here. No stones. Let us head south."
"Whatever you say, Brother."
As the minute lurched on, the wing flapping grew more and more distant.
Rainbow Dash stuck her head out, stared at the empty skies, and exhaled with relief.
"Well, then..." Lancie cracked the stone joints of his neck. "That was some rather fortuitous exposition." He smirked. "Wasn't it?"
"Do you have any idea what this means?" Rainbow stammered.
"Somebody's getting super lazy?"
Rainbow grinned at the statue. "Not all of the dragons are cool with Aatxe and his obsession with the shards!" She winked. "Hah! I told you that we'd learn something from snooping around here!"
He folded his arms, glaring. "Now this was just a matter of chance."
"Says you." Rainbow Dash reached into her satchel with numb hooves. "If most of Aatxe's brood feels like those two brothers did, then maybe we can find an edge! Spike notwithstanding, most dragons I've ever met or heard of aren't exactly the sharpest knives in the drawer. Wanna bet that my pony talking skills could get them to turn on their own Big Boss?"
"Wanna bet that every square inch of your pony body is flammable under dragon breath?"
"Oh hush." Rainbow frowned, fumbling through her satchel. "I was just spitting out the first idea that came to mind."
"Well, it was a dumb idea."
"All the better for me to stand on, cuz now we've got something to climb onto." At last, she pulled out a jar of Zecora's potion. "... ... ..." She stared at it, nostrils flaring. Eventually, she shoved the thing in and fastened the satchel shut. "I'm good. It can wait." She flexed her wing muscles. "The only thing that can't wait is Apple Bloom."
"So then..." Lancie instinctually hopped onto her back. "...is it go time?"
"It's go time and a half." Fwoooosh! Rainbow shot out of the building like a blue bullet. "At least we now know what the dragons call this place!"
"Yes! 'Blasted lands,'" Lancie said with a sly grin. "I'm certain something special happens here at level sixty and ninety."
"They were headed south... to search..." Rainbow took a deep breath. "So, I'm willing to bet we head north."
Lancie took a shuddering breath. "You would guess right."
"Huh?"
"I do believe I sense the shards due north of us."
"Funny..." Rainbow blinked, arching an eyebrow. "I could have sworn it was northwest of us earlier."
"Yes. It would appear as though the location of my shards has... moved."
"Moved?"
Lancie shrugged into the high winds. "Your guess is as good as mine."
Rainbow blinked at that. She stared down at the distant earth's surface. Through every other clearing in the forests, she spotted an orange figure peering up at her.
Rainbow's jaw clenched. "No more guessing." She flapped her wings harder. "Time for finding!" And she shot the two of them north in a prismatic blur.
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I hadn't noticed.
So... Lancie's a stallion now?
...A Draconian Sky Fortress, perhaps?
So, is Aaxte carrying the shards on him? That'll add a fun twist to the story.
Announcing North by Northwest, a film by Alfred Hitchlemur! Starring: Ashleigh Ball!
bulbajer.files.wordpress.com/2015/08/dash.png
John de Lancie!
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Evil venom-induced hallucinatory Ashleigh Ball!
vignette1.wikia.nocookie.net/villainsfanon/images/5/53/Eviljack.png/revision/latest?cb=20140128050725
And James Mason!
bulbajer.files.wordpress.com/2015/08/aatxe.png
Coming to a theater near you!
6366472 I believe that the term stallion can be used for a male of any species, even chaos gods!
That's so meta. Or fourth-wall-shattering.
Hell, maybe both. I dunno...
Unlike in Austraeoh, Rainbow Dash is not Change. But she does carry Change on her wings. She has already been changing the status quo around, and it seems she wants to do that to the dragons too.
Aatxe ate 'em!
Well, time to attack dragons I guess.
Maybe Aatxe is wearing Lancies shards as a snazzy necklace, and is lamenting his incomplete set.
Hmmmm, I wonder what's going to happen next...
Does this mean what I think it means?
DRAGONS AND DASH AND LANCIE VS OTHER DRAGONS! THE EPIC BATTLE OF THE EON! YEAH!
Goddammit Axan.
It's okay Skirts, we still love you.
I missed a reference.
Edit: Cursory googling suggests it's World of Warcraft.