• Published 4th Dec 2013
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Appledashery - Just Essay



Rainbow Dash lives an exciting life and is swiftly becoming the most daring, awesome pegasus in all of Equestria. She would gladly give it all up, though, just to confess her love to Applejack.

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This Is Why They Closed Down River Country

"Mmmmmm..."

Rainbow quivered.

"Hrmmmm..."

Rainbow stirred.

"Grnnnh... hhhhtt..."

Slowy, inch by twitching inch, the petite pegasus woke up. She turned over in her sleeping bag, a tiny smile on her face. Her ears twitched pleasantly in the warm morning glow. At last, her lips pursed.

"I... I wish..."

She yawned, then sighed with a dreamy coo.

"I wish I—" Suddenly, her eyes exploded, and she slapped a pair of hooves over her muzzle before she could say the last three. "!!!" Shivering, she glanced left.

Applejack's sleeping bag was empty.

In a jolt, she glanced right.

The wagon was empty; Stu Leaves was gone.

"... ... ..." Rainbow Dash exhaled wheezingly, her whole body lying limp, eyes squinting up at the gray sky. "That was too... too close." She shut her eyes, catching her breath. Stirring, she brought a hoof up to her muzzle and gave it a tiny rub. "Mmmm... grnnngh..." Her eyes fluttered open as she rubbed her face some more. "Grff... not fuzzy enough..."

Eventually, using her wings as tripods, Rainbow pushed herself up into a sitting position. She winced, flexing one forelimb, then the other. The world suddenly felt like a numb dream, and her nerves tingled in random places.

"Dang it," she muttered. "Noir shoulda bought me an entire truckload."

With a lethargic breath, she stood up—almost immediately falling on her dull limbs. Fighting off a low-pitched grumble, she flapped her wings and hovered limply towards the wagon. Once there, she fought and fumbled to open her personal saddlebag with numb hooves.

"I can get by with just half a jar, right?" she muttered to herself. "I mean, that should be enough. Not like I'm gonna be cartwheeling across the Mareson-Dixie Line." Suddenly, she paused, remembering how long she had been pulling the cart along with Applejack the previous day. "Then again."

Nevertheless, she opened the bag and reached for the first of several large, sloshing jars. She was just about to open it when she paused, ears twitching involuntarily. With a nervous slump, she dropped the jar back into the bag and spun around, mouth agape.

"Wait a second..." Her brow furrowed. "Just where are AJ and Stu...?"


Rainbow Dash flew a long distance from the wagon. The previous day, she had only been paying attention to Applejack and her words. It suddenly occurred to her that she hadn't made any legitimate attempt to get her bearings before the group settled for the night. Now, as the morning sun glittered across tree after tree, she was just starting to survey a thin thicket of woods bordering the side of the country highway.

"Applejack?" she stammered, hovering slowly as she glanced down both lines of trees flanking her. "AJ...?"

All that answered was rustling leaves and birdsong. A low mist hung over the grass at a distance, casting an eerie sheen over the forestscape.

"Come on, Applejack. This is totally uncool." She frowned in mid-wing-flap. "It's totally not like you to bail on a camp site." She gulped, mewling: "Is it...?"

More silence.

Rainbow Dash shuddered, hugging herself in midair. "I swear, if they got eaten by a Manticore, Stu Leaves had better have gotten swallowed first," she grumbled. "So AJ could use his thick skull as a drill to burst out of the stomach."

At last, something echoed against the tree trunks. It was a giggling sound, bright and mischievous.

Rainbow spun about, ears perked. "AJ...?"

She flew towards the sound. Soon enough, the giggling intensified.

"Applejack?" Rainbow craned her neck. "What the hay, girl?" She panted, strung between relief and confusion. "You could warn a mare before you run off like—"

"Heh heh heh! I mean it, Stu! Cut it out!" A splashing sound. "Ya dag blame'd fool! Yer askin' for it!"

Rainbow stopped dead in her aerial tracks, eyebrow twitching. "Apple... j-jack...?"

More splashing. "Stu! Land's sakes, stop grabbin' them!" Splish-splash. "Heheheh... reckon there's no stoppin' a stallion when he's got his mind on somethin'."

Rainbow grimaced, but soon that grimace turned into a frown. Sneering, she buzzed her wings into a full blur and shot ahead.

Half a second later, she burst through a line of trees and hovered high, shouting. "Okay, Stu Leaves! You heard the mare! Knock it..." She blinked. "...off?"

Before her, a pond lay, surrounded by fruit trees. Applejack's hat and hair ribbons rested along the shore, and the farm filly herself was wading neck-deep in the crystal-clear water. It so happened that she was alone.

Stu Leaves, on the other hand, was several feet away, hovering, and completely dry. He had several peaches collected in the crook of one hoof, and he was reaching his other hoof up to a tree branch to pluck several more loose.

Both the stallion and the mare were gawking at Rainbow and her entrance.

"What... huh...?" Rainbow stammered.

"Heh..." Stu Leaves fidgeted awkwardly. "I guess I know when I'm outnumbered."

"The hay is going on here?" Rainbow's voice cracked.

"Well, I haven't had a rinse in several days." Applejack shrugged, splashing water. She smiled with wet, glistening freckles. "Then I found this here pond, and I figured 'No time like the present!'"

Rainbow glared. "You just spontaneously decided to go skinny-dipping."

"Why not? It's in my blood!" Applejack backstroked, a relaxed expression on her slick orange face. "Granny Smith was the river-divin' champion of Ponyville, don'tcha know!"

"Uhhhhhhh..."

"Just havin' a relaxin' morning rinse!" Applejack came to a stop, then frowned Stu's way. "Or at least I would be if somepony wasn't crusin' for a bruisin'!"

"Come on, Applejack." Stu Leaves rolled his eyes as he plucked another fruit. "They're just peaches!"

"They're wild peaches, ya dumb varmint!"

"It's not like anypony owns them or anything!" Stu smirked. "I'm just curious!"

"There's no tellin' if they're poisonous or not!" Applejack grumbled, treading water. "At the very least, they could be filled with bugs or uneatable seeds or—"

Stu Leaves chuckled and chuckled harder.

Applejack groaned. "What's got ya brayin' like a cockeyed donkey now?"

"I just think you loathe any fruit that's not an apple!"

"I do not!" Applejack frowned, folding her forelimbs with a pout. "Why, some of my best relatives even resort to peddlin' oranges!"

"'Resort to peddling oranges?'" Stu giggle-snorted. "AJ, do you even hear yourself?!"

"So what?"

"I wanna get into the fruit-planting business someday! Says so in my almanac that it helps to have an open mind!" He winked. "Would it really kill me to sample some peaches?"

"No, but I might kill you!" Applejack growled.

"Hahahahaha!"

"Nnnnngh..." Rainbow Dash slumped in midair, rubbing a hoof across her forehead. "Seriously? This is what you guys ditched the campsite for?"

"Why, is something wrong?" Stu asked.

Rainbow Dash didn't even give the stallion the satisfaction of a sideways glance.

"Awwwwwww... lighten up, sugarcube." Applejack stroked her way to the pond's edge and smiled up at her. "We didn't say nothin' cuz you were sleepin' all peaceful-like. You did do an awful lot of wagon trotting yesterday, after all."

"Yeah, well..."

"We could tell you were dead tired too," Stu Leaves said.

"Yeah?" Rainbow glared. "Why's that?"

He blinked. "... ... ...because of the snoring, of course."

"Gotta hoof it to ya, Rainbow." Applejack shook her head, chuckling. "Yer a regular locomotive."

Rainbow fidgeted. "Yeah, well..." She gulped. "Could be worse," she murmured to the wind.

"Why don'tcha hop in, Rainbow?" Applejack gestured. "The water's fine!"

"Meh. If I want a good rinse, I'll just kick up a rain cloud."

"Heh... reckon I don't blame you." Applejack sighed as she slowly trotted out of the pond, her lithe body dripping all over with wet beads of moisture. "While I'm happy n'all to get the muck of country travel off, now I've got a full hour of hair-dryin' and mane-brushin' to deal with." With a breathy sigh, she tossed her golden threads back, so that they settled in golden swaths around her soaked neck. She smirked—freckle full—into the golden glow of dawn. "And I just brushed this dang thing out last night. Ah well. Rainbow, I know this sounds mighty silly, but I dun suppose you could lend a hoof with gettin' my mane straight this morning? That way we could set out on the road faster—"

SPLOOOOSH! Rainbow Dash plunged like a torpedo into the shallow pond.

"Whoah nelly!" Applejack jumped.

"Gaah!" Stu Leaves flailed from the splattering droplets. He dropped half of his peaches.

Seconds later, Rainbow burst to the surface with a gasp. She bobbed up and down, shivering with a crooked smile. "Say... this water is niiiiiiiiiiice and cold, isn't it?" A nervous giggle, and she dunked herself again. "Blblblbbblbbbb-yeahhhh... nice and cold and... cold."

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