- Member Since 30th Apr, 2013
- offline last seen April 10th
wille179
I write stories so that I won't be kept awake at night with a brain full of ponies.
wille179
Joined 30th Apr, 2013 ·
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i love it
3559607
I'm glad you like it. Expect more soon-ish.
Quite interesting. I don't think the concept of one of the three tribes as being nonexistent (or possibly outlawed, with 'mutants' either having their 'growths' cut off at birth or risking getting rounded up and killed?) is one that has been touched on much in fanfiction. Given the dark tone, it seems you're going for a grey and grey morality setting. I like the idea of Twilight and Trixie being on the same side with a strong familial band - not just because they're my favorites, but because I love the dynamic they have when they team up.
The chapter was rather short, and I would have liked to see more as a start to draw the readers in. And it would have been interesting to see some dialogue from Trixie and Spike, to establish their characters, like you did with Twilight. I hope we'll get to see that soon enough in the next chapter. I'll be tracking this story for further progress.
Well, this is a bit more than "slightly AU". I think it reached the point of "way AU" when, to quote Trixie, “I always hate watching you work, Twilight. You and Spike always have the creepiest smiles while you commit mindless slaughter.”
I'm not complaining, mostly just wondering where you're gonna take this story. You have my interest, please continue.
Although, if Celestia and Luna are busy pushing the sun and moon across the sky how do they have any time to rule an empire?
3560005
I think they just shove it in place and leave it for a few hours, i.e. 12 hours of high-noon lighting then suddenly midnight for 12 hours. It doesn't take more than a few minutes.
I like it a lot. Can't wait to see more.
Also feet should be feat in the last paragraph.
3560995
Thank you!
Thank you.
Certainly a novel concept. I have to ask though, are Celestia/Luna really that different in this AU, or are they just hiding their horns? Because if literally all magic used nowadays is internal magic then that would be a pretty damn big whole in Equestria's ability to defend itself from things like say... Changelings*, for starters.
*Another good example of a canon enemy that would be really freaking hard to fight without magic would probably be Wendigos, unless they were somehow still able to pull off Hearth's Warming without Clover (not really sure if that's even possible). Then you have Discord, and perhaps non-canonically, whatever the heck the Nightmare was...
I'm sorry if I'm somehow bugging you with all this, I suppose I just want to know more about the world you're writing about, which I'm told is a very good sign.
3561471
No, it really is that different. Celestia/luna don't have horns. Changelings cannot use unicorn-style magic, only pegasus/earth. Earth ponies and pegasi can weild the elements, but the 6th element is friendship, not magic.
I have no idea what happened to the wendigos... Maybe with only two tribes, there was enough food to go around and one less faction to feed, so the fighting that lead to hearths warming never happened. I'll have to explore that.
Don't worry, all will be explained with Nm moon.
As for the internal magic, there are some things that all races can do, but Twilight has a huge advantage. It would be like trying to cut skin with a very sharp sword (unicorn) versus your fingernails (earth pony).
You have my interest, sir.
Indeed! The concept of cutting out one of the tribes is too little explored, and it looks like you have the skill to pull it off!
Oh, I love 'slightly' AU stories.
3563699
Sorry, is that slightly sarcasm or emphasis? I can't tell.
3563706
I don't even know
3561758 WOW i think your starting something new here dude?!
Wow, this looks really good from the premise. I look forward to it being "complete", so I can binge the whole thing at once!
3569328
Don't hold your breath. I have no idea how long that will take, but I'm 60% done with chapter 3 at this time.
3569498
Oh I know this isn't going to be finished any time soon, this has "epic" written all over it (in the traditional sense I mean, but quite possibly also the modern one too.)
3569565
This story is writing practice for me with an emphasis on world building. In fact, each one of my stories has a different emphasis. Of course, the side effect of that effort that is you get an (hopefully) awesome story.
This is really good (as evidenced by my favorite) but there's just one thing that always bugs me when I see it; unnecessary all caps. There's other, better ways to put some emphasis on something and it looks ways better than THIS DOES. Trust me.
As it is, though, I am quite enjoying this! Can't wait to see what you have in mind for the other ponies.
Jaw, meet floor.
Wow. This is outstanding. More please?
Just regained higher level rational thought. This is just an experiment in world building for you? I am in awe.
this is a good length. if it takes an extra day to get this length, so be it.
the chapter name should be tatgpt not tagtpt
uhhhh im confused. what is AU? (so far im assuming it is gold
)
So Twi is offense, Shiny is defense, and Trixie is support.
Also god damn it Trixie.
3574448
Thank you.
3574666
Twilight is a solo tank with AoE, Shiny is ranged support with high DPS on a single target. Trixie uses status effects and trap spells.
3574613
AU = Alternate Universe. Genre where the world/history/laws of physics are different than in canon.
3574726 ah ok thank you ( although now you tell me, it is painstakingly obvious)
3574720 so i am taking it its where lrya is a wing pony and bonbon is just the some?
3576670
Lyra and BonBon are now both earth ponies.
3577955 ok
Oh god, not the Twicane!
You pulled a noodle incident.
3574613 alternate universe
Ahhhh the twilycane noooooooooo lord help us!!!!!
Ahh for the sake of the gods twilacane will kill us all!!
please update this it was amzing tp ready just dark enough that its super fun to read
I'm a little sad that this was cancelled.
I know its a gag but the impossibility of a "ancient twilicane" haunts me.