“So... how’s Star doing?” Ethan asked, his voice full of concern.
A pained look appeared on Shining Armor’s face, but he quickly smothered it. Ethan saw it anyways and sighed.
“Yeah... that’s what I thought,” Ethan said with a sigh of his own as the two walked along the hallways of the Crystal Palace. “Where is Star right now anyways?”
“He’s off with Cadence at the therapist's office,” Shining said, a neutral tone in his voice. “He’s getting better... but it’s... it’s slow.”
Ethan put a comforting hand on Shining’s shoulder. “Shining... just do your best. Be a dad, it’s been working for me so far,” the man told him, giving the stallion a smile.
“You know... when I first met you... I would never have imagined that you were capable of being so rational,” Shining commented, a small wry note in his voice.
“Yeah, you and me both Shiny,” Ethan replied, earning a slight chuckle from Shining. “So Shiny... why am I here exactly? I mean, Sparky said it was something about defending the Element of Magic... but that doesn’t make sense because Sparky can kick the ass of pretty much anyone out there,” the man asked, giving Shining a raised eyebrow.
“That’s true... Twily has become quite good at combat,” Shining agreed with a nod. Over the last two years speaking about his sisters killing prowess had become a lot easier. “But she wants you here in case something unexpected happens.”
“Eh, fair enough,” Ethan said with a shrug. “I’m always good for stopping the unexpected.”
“Yeah,” Shining agreed. “That’s an understatement.”
“I just hope that this thing happens soon,” Ethan replied, looking out the window at the setting sun. “Because I promised Cassie that I’d be around to watch the kids by the day after tommorow so that she Boone, and Cass can make a trip to the NCR and set up a business deal.”
Shining nodded. “Hopefully it won’t take that long. If it seems like it will, you’re free to go,” the stallion replied. “It’s not like we’re going to keep you prisoner.”
Ethan grinned. “Thanks Shiny.”
“So... Tia, you sure this is going to work?” Twilight asked Celestia slowly from where she was positioned curled up against the alicorn who was resting a white wing over her back.
“I believe that Sunset Shimmer will make an appearance, yes,” Celestia replied before giving Twilight a small loving nuzzle.
“And you’re absolutely sure that Ethan needs to be here?” Twilight asked.
“To be honest I am not positive,” Celestia answered with a slight sigh. “Of course, if he needs to be then he will be so it’s better safe then sorry.”
“You do realize that he might kill Sunset right?” the purple unicorn asked her lover with a raised eyebrow.
“I know that it is a possibility... but I would like to capture her before she does anymore harm,” Celestia said with a small sigh. “If he does end her life then... well... it is better than allowing a unicorn who absorbed almost as much knowledge from me as you have to rise to power.”
Twilight nodded her head. “I understand Tia,” the mare said with a soft sigh before she gave the alicorn a gentle kiss. “Now... we should probably go to bed.” She levitated the Element of Magic off of her head and onto the nightstand beside her
“Agreed,” Celestia replied, giving the mare a gentle kiss of her own before she turned the light off with a small flip of her golden magic.
A cloaked figure ghosted silently through the halls of the Crystal Palace, her horn’s glow dim against the background. Sunset Shimmer let out an internal egomaniacle laugh, she was sooo close. Her ultimate victory was mere hours away, she would rule over Equestria with an iron bound magic with her army of slaves! The mare was so busy grinning that she didn’t notice the human until she ran into his leg.
She stumbled back, in surprise and then looked up at the tall imposing man looking down at her with a raised eyebrow.
“Hiya, are you lost?” the human asked in a chipper voice.
Sunset stared at him in surprise for a moment longer and then shook her head.
“Sorry... I didn’t see you there,” she said.
“Eh, that’s fine, it’s pretty dark out in here,” the man replied with a shrug. “So, what’s your name miss?”
“My name is Sunset Shimmer,” the mare replied, though she was beginning to get annoyed with the man, something about him was just... annoying. Not only that... what in the heck was a human doing in Equestria? The only way that she knew that was possible was through the Portal... and it didn’t let you keep your shape. Sunset’s brow furrowed beneath her cloak but she shook her head, she had more important things to do than talk to the monkey.
“Cool, I’m Ethan,” the man replied with a grin. “Nice to meet you.”
“Yes yes, would you mind moving?” Sunset asked, gritting her teeth slightly.
Ethan raised an eyebrow at her. “Sure I guess, you one of the maids or something?”
Sunset shot him a glare, but nodded. “Yes, I’m a maid or something,” she growled. “Now get out of my way.”
“Fine, fine,” Ethan replied, stepping aside and allowing the mare to continue on her way. “I’m not here to hold up the help, even if they are bitches.”
Sunset stopped in mid stride and shot the man a glare, silently thinking. When I return with my army you will be the first to die!
Luckily for her, Ethan couldn’t read minds and had stopped worrying about her, continuing his rounds. Beneath her hood Sunset smiled wickedly, now was the time to get the crown!
“Hey,” Ethan’s voice suddenly called to her making her freeze again. Sunset slowly turned to look at him.
“Yes?” she asked, her voice a bit strained from the level of annoyance he was causing her.
“It’s impolite to wear hoods indoors,” Ethan told her with a small chuckle. “At least that’s what Sparky tells me.”
Sunset stared at him blankly for a moment before shoving her hood off, revealing her crimson and and yellow mane before stalking off in a huff.
“Huh, wonder what crawled up her ass and died,” Ethan muttered before shrugging and walking off.
Once she was out of his sight, Sunset pulled her hood back up over her mane and continued through the Crystal Palace, following the weak tracking spell she’d established on the Element of magic. Quiet as a racoon she walked down the corridor until she came to a large door with a sun painted on it. Sunset frowned... she’d been expecting it to be with the Element of Magic herself... but it made more sense from a practical standpoint for Celestia herself to keep track and protect it, she supposed.
She eased the door open, casting a quieting spell on the hinges and walked in to see a sight that she wasn’t exactly expecting, in fact, it dumbfounded her enough to make her halt in her stride. Lying asleep atop the bed was her ex-mentor Princess Celestia... that was the expected part. The unexpected part was the purple unicorn who was currently spooning the elder alicorn. Sunset’s jaw dropped at the sight and it took her almost a minute to recover.
“Guess you’re not such a virginal old nag anymore are you Celestia?” Sunset whispered to herself as she crouched and quickly snuck over to the nightstand where the Element of Magic was sitting in a small case. With ease Sunset swapped it with the duplicate she’d stolen. However, as she did so she couldn’t stop a small maniacal giggle from escaping her mouth.
IT’S FINALLY MINE! she mentally cheered to herself. ALL MINE!
Suddenly, the purple unicorn stirred slightly in her sleep, roused by the mare’s giggle. Her eyes opened blearily and Summer found herself staring into one purple eye... and one terrifying robotic blue one. Sunset stared for half a second, before turning tail and fleeing out of the room.
Twilight separated herself from Celestia’s sleeping embrace and took off after the mare. “Get back here with my Element you bitch!” she shouted at the top of her lungs, rousing Celestia from her sleep with a start.
Sunset ignored the coarse language being directed at her and teleported several dozen feet ahead of the mare who responded by firing a blast of force strong enough to make Sunset stumble a bit even though it had hit where she’d been before she teleported. Fortunately for Sunset, the hall of the Mirror wasn’t too far away, and through a combination of skill and luck she made it to the room without being hit by any of the mare’s blasts.
That’s where he good luck ended. Standing just through the doors was Ethan, an annoyed frown on his face. Sunset tried to run past him, but he grabbed her by the tail and roughly pulled her off of her hooves.
“Hi again,” Ethan said with an unamused look. “Remember me?”
“Let go of me!” Sunset shouted at him.
“Na, just not feeling it,” Ethan replied as he continued to hold her. “Hey, Sparky, I caught her,” he called down the corridor to the rapidly approaching mare who was still yet to round the final corner.
“No you didn’t! I won’t let my dream end here!” Sunset growled, teleporting out of the man’s grip and running straight through the portal before Ethan had a chance to react.
Ethan let out a low growl. “Stupid cheating unicorns,” he growled as he walked towards the mirror. Twilight came to a stop in front of him and gave him a dry look.
“She teleported out of your hand, didn’t she?” Twilight inquired with a sigh.
“Yeah,” Ethan grunted.
“And she went through that mirror didn’t she?” Twilight asked, pointing towards the mirror.
“Yeah,” he grunted again. “We have to go get her don’t we?”
“Yeah,” Twilight replied. “She stole my Element.”
“Great, let’s go,” Ethan said, gesturing towards the portal as dawn’s light began to fill the hall of the Mirror.
“You can’t, or not yet at any rate,” Celestia told them as she walked into the room, she’d only been a few meters behind Twilight in her run.
“Why not?” Ethan inquired. “It’s just a portal right? Kind of like the ones that I use to get to the Wasteland or here, isn’t it?”
Celestia sighed. “In a way, but it takes a little bit more explaining than that...”
Ethan and Twilight both waited paitently as Celestia filled them in with the backstory of Sunset Shimmer along with the way the Mirror worked and when she finished Ethan shot her a glare.
“You know Sunny, if you had just told me who to watch out for then I could have saved as an assload of trouble right now,” he told her. “I bumped into SS earlier this evening and if I’d known that she was the one you were watching for I could’ve just knocked her out.”
“I realize that,” Celestia admitted with a frown. “But I didn’t want you accidentally attacking one of the help.”
Ethan gave her an unamused look. “Oh come on,” he grumbled.
“You did last time I told you to be on the lookout for anything suspicious,” Celestia replied. “That poor mime will never speak again.”
“Hey, he shouldn’t have been wandering the castle at night,” Ethan replied with a grumble.
“That’s no reason for you to punch him in the throat and stuff him in a closet until the Guard arrived!” Celestia retorted.
Ethan crossed his arms over his chest but shrugged. “Fine, maybe you’ve got a point, still you could have at least told me her name.”
“We’re wasting time,” Twilight said, stepping in between the two. “The longer we stand here and argue the longer Sunset Shimmer has to escape.”
“Very true Twilight,” Celestia said, giving the younger mare a warm look. “I agree, you must both leave at once. Though Ethan, you must leave your weapons here.”
“What, all of them?” Ethan asked her, an outraged tone in his voice.
“Yes, otherwise you may draw unwanted attention to yourself,” Celestia said. “And Mother knows you don’t need help doing that.”
“What can I say, it’s my raw animal magnetism,” the man told her with a smirk causing Celestia to roll her eyes.
“Duly noted, now, your weapons,” she said.
Ethan grumbled as he pulled his combat shotgun, red bastard sword, and anti-material rifle from his back. Then he reached to his belt and pulled his favorite 12.7mm pistol and submachine-gun from his hip holsters. The man’s hands then reached into his pockets and he pulled out around two dozen grenades, a mixture of plasma and pulse. Finally, he reached into his boot and yanked out a bowie knife.
“There, that’s everything,” he grunted. “Happy now?”
“Extremely,” Celestia replied, giving the man a smile.
“Good, at least one of us is,” he replied with another grumble before turning to Twilight. “You ready Sparky?”
“Yes, one second please,” Twilight answered. She stepped up and gave Celestia a deep, passionate kiss. She pulled away and gave Celestia a smile. “Something to remember me by.”
Celestia chuckled. “As if I could forget you,” she said, a note of amusement in her voice. “Stay safe my Little Sparkle.”
“Always do,” Twilight replied with a smile. “Besides, I’ve been to the Wasteland and I really doubt that anything where I’m going can measure up to that.”
“Yeah, and she’s got me too,” Ethan added with a smirk as he ruffled Twilight’s mane. “Nothing bad happens to Sparky when I’m around.”
“Besides losing an eye, a leg, a-” Celestia began to point out.
“Thanks Sunbutt, but she’ll be fine,” Ethan replied flatly. “I promise.”
A small smile appeared on Celestias face. “I know, I just worry about her.”
“Well, like I told you; you’ve got nothing to worry about,” the man told her before turning back to Twilight. “Let’s light this candle and capture this bitch eh?”
Twilight chuckled. “Yes, let’s, no one steals my Element and gets away with it,” she agreed, walking for the mirror. Ethan gave Celestia a last wave, and together the two walked through the portal.
There was a swirling flash of light, suddenly he was lying flat in the green grass on the other side. Ethan felt... different. With a groan, he pushed himself to his knees and shook his head to clear it before slowly turning around and looking into the mirror. What he saw made his stomach drop.
It was his face sure enough... but it looked... much younger. There was no pain in his eyes, no lines on his face, no scars blemishing his cheeks, forehead or lips… and it was covered in zits.
“Oh you have got to be kidding me!” he shouted, his voice cracking.
That was when he noticed the shape on the ground beside him. It was a purple haired teenager wearing a blue shirt and a lavender skirt. She groaned and looked around blearily for a second before trying to rise onto all fours, and failing horribly.
“Owww... what the hell?” the girl asked in a familiar voice.
“Sparky?” Ethan asked slowly, looking down at the woman.
“Ethan?” Twilight asked, turning her head up to stare at him, Ethan noticed that her mechanical eyes was missing, as was her leg. “What the hell happened to you?”
“I think the more important question here is what the hell happened to you,” Ethan replied, wincing at the voice crack.
“You look and sound like... like... like a teenager,” Twilight muttered.
“Yeah, and you grew actual boobs,” Ethan pointed out. “Nice rack Sparky, heh,” he added with a chuckle.
Twilight finally got herself together enough to take a look down at herself and her eyes widened in surprise. She promptly faceplanted.
“This is going to be a pain in the ass, isn’t it?” she groaned as she tried to rise up to her feet, failing.
“Probably,” Ethan replied, offering her a hand and pulling her up. The teenager stumbled forwards and ran into Ethan’s chest, grabbing onto him for support. Her face ended up inches away from Ethan’s and they locked gazes. The man’s eyes widened and a fierce blush crossed his face. “Hi...Sparky.”
Twilight blushed as well and looked away. “Hi... Ethan,” she replied, peeling her face away from his and taking an unsteady step back. “We umm... should get going,” she said, her blush deepening. “You know... looking for Summer.”
Ethan coughed and looked away. “Um yea, right,” he agreed while thinking to himself and looking at Twilight. I’m a married stud, I’m a married stud, I’m a marrie - oh god her rack is amazing! The man shook his head, doing his best to clear it of ‘bad thoughts’.
Twilight had caught his look and her blush deepened as she followed his thoughts. “Right... I-we should really get going,” she said again. How did I never notice how sexy he is? she wondered to herself. Even with the zits he’s still a total hu - stop it! You sleep with a goddess! she thought angrily to herself but she couldn’t totally suppress the feelings raging through her. Instead she turned on her heel and fell flat on her face.
Ethan grinned at the sight despite himself, and walked around to offer her his hand again.
“It’s going to be a long day,” Twilight groaned.
“Yes, yes it will,” Ethan agreed. “Still, let’s have fun with this.”
“How?” Twilight asked.
“Oh you know,” he told her with a sly grin.
“No, actually I don’t,” Twilight replied, narrowing her eyebrows at him.
“Good, because neither do I,” he told her, smirking as Twilight groaned in frustration.
Twilight looked over at him and gave the man an annoyed look to which he simply smirked wider and despite herself, Twilight found herself smiling back... maybe this would be fun after all.
Oh hormones are a beautiful thing aren't they? Anyways, the bit at the end comes from two things. 1. The aforementioned hormones. 2.The fact that I'd originally planned on pairing Ethan and Twi off until I thought better of it so I decided to have a go at it here in a new setting. No they won't actually 'hook up' but it's a taste of what could have been.
Anyways, I hope you enjoyed it.
My main complaint is the same I said about Equestria girls :
The characters are way too stupid and irrationnal.
Celestia know about the Mirror, why this thing is not broken, warded or left in a pit full of Manticores ?
Where are the guards ? Why there is not a pair of them at the doors of Celestia's bedroom ? Why none of them are patrolling the area between the Mirror and the chamber ?
Why Twilight was unable to stop Shimmer dead in her track with a spell ? You've made her crazy powerfull in the past stories, Shimmer couldn't be able to outrun her at all, and Twilight should be able to snipe her anytime and anywhere.
How Shimmer had been aware of the Element of Magic if it was just a legend in her time, and she couldn't know the appearence of the Element ? Even Twilight didn't have a fucking clue about that. And how did she cast a tracking spell on an item she don't know anything about ?
I'm sure you're writing this story for comedic purpose, but I think you need to adress these issues of Equestria girls, because making characters even stupider than they are in the show is not really going to work good.
3509910
*ahem*
Celestia hoped that Sunset would come back. Unfortunately, she did with the intent of stealing something, not to make amends.
There was a patrol. Clearly as they are deep within friendly territory, and the fact that Celestia is a (in this canon) a goddess, physical threats aren't a concern. Hence the lack of guards at her room.
Twilight is half-asleep. That's the best I got.
It appears that this takes place a lot later than it actually does in the movie, which would mean that Sunset could have spent several cycles in the Mirror. Logically, she could have popped out at one point, got the relevant information, and returned. The tracking spell, we can assume traces the magical signature or whatever of the big crown thingy.
Note, this is me pulling shit out of my ass.
Again,WHY not just send in the super heavily armed guy to deal with it?...Sure it might cause a commotion,But so does winged chicks and ones who can use telekinesis (and talking semi-lizard looking dogs)....Over all,Sending in a fully geared ethan would likely cause LESS commotion than little miss magic panties
i cant wait to see how this goes :3
I can understand not taking the heavy or advanced weapons but why not take at least a knife or small gun, he is at least as skilled as his wife who can sneak a light machine gun into a casino past security, a school should be no problem.
Truth be told I am interested I just hope this story doesn't turn out to be a direct retelling with Ethan just happening to be there.
YAY more Ethan!
3509910
Look to 3509935 for the answer to most of your questions, he's surprisingly good at pulling stuff out of his ass and somehow matching what I had in mind. Also, I'd like to point out that I'm writing this purly because I thought it would be fun so please excuse anything that upsets you about EQG in general.
3509972
Well for one; how often do you see heavily armed men walking around the streets? He'd have the police called on him a matter of minutes for one and then he'd get into a shootout with said police, then they'd call the SWAT team and things would go from there to the National Guard and... well yeah, I already thought about it in my head and I couldn't do it feasibly. Also... I'm American and at the moment the idea of bringing a gun of any kind into a school makes me a bit uncomfortable.
3510407
I answered the guns bit above and as for the knife you'll just have to see
And don't worry, we're not going to be retreading all that much.
3510443>>3510121
Glad that at least someone is happy
3510478
We think so alike sometimes it's scary.
3510478
It's the crazy son of a bitch Ethan. Why wouldn't I be?
3510485
You don't know the half of it...
Fallout makes everything better even the
travestysub par thing "Equestria Girls" was, post like the wind you mad genius.I never truly like EQG, but for some reason, the fanfic's it spawned are fun. This... This is brilliant.
3512127
Why thank you, I'm trully happy to hear that
3510478 Im a canadian,And i know that a fallout protag would win that fight
He needs to have brought at least SOME form of weapon from the Wasteland.
Also, this.
Best!
I like the idea of Twilight coming back to the wasteland, like a vacation of sorts.
I like Twilight's personaliTITS
Is Twilight still a cyborg in the other world, because explaining that would be a bitch.
3517680
He just said Twi's robot attachments were gone
3517680>>3517911
Yeah, that would be a bit difficult to explain.
"Well my eye is glowing blue because of umm...."
"Radiation," Ethan put in with a nod.
*Cue blank stares from everyone*
I never really read adventure stories. But this seems low-key. And it has Twilestia!
You have my attention.
YESSSSSS. CONTINUATION!!!
3518032
Good Answer!
Here's my attempt at making you a story pict.
mail.google.com/mail/u/0/?ui=2&ik=4558a8296d&view=fimg&th=1427dc6e22ba5d9a&attid=0.1&disp=inline&realattid=f_hoaulqs20&safe=1&attbid=ANGjdJ8XCnr1VIDsZ_uvaFfncTLBc22LNMEUiLWJkL5GP9R4dCoJCtuEZaVPgFYRtvgHsLq-g6czumkeH1GEeNTPEkcotnzZx6fiJEXzDB-iQasAkrLuxSsuYVgbi8M&ats=1385089662729&rm=1427dc6e22ba5d9a&zw&sz=w1293-h543
3521950
For some reason neither of my computers can view it in the comments section, send it to me in a pm please
Hey, Ed2461, wanna know something I discovered during a random obscenely thorough research into the universe of Fallout? Turns out psychic powers are canon, which means you could've made Ethan extra OP by allowing him to make fire/electricity/force/light with his mind, idle thoughts of a sleep deprived geek here.
EDIT: Here's the link, which I forgot http://fallout.wikia.com/wiki/Psyker
This was funny. Looking forward to the next parts.
Here's a question, though.
*clears throat*
Assuming Sunset Shimmer was about Twilight's S1 age when she vanished, and Twilight was a filly(Say... Eight?) when she became Princess Celestia's student(With the slot being empty by that time), why is she not an adult and in college at the least?
I called plot hole at first, but my secondary explanation was time dilation.
Okay, so, the Portal opens up once every thirty moons, right? Roughly one lunar cycle to a month, so about two and a half years. Give/take about a month.
How old's Twilight in your story? Twenties? (I think you mentioned it somewhere, but I forgot how old she was, exactly)
Assuming age of twenty, that's a period of twelve years from student rendering age of eight. Roughly five portal openings?
Sunset's been there for at least a year. Maybe two?
Assuming a span of twelve years on the Equestrian side, Sunset only having been there about one year their time(1.25, maybe?) That means the portal opens up either once every 2.4 months, or once per season(3 months).
Assuming an age of twenty-nine, that's a period of twenty-one years. So, eight or nine?
In THIS case, that means it would open between once every 1.5 months and 1.3 months(Assuming one year), or between once every ~1.9 months and 1.6 months.(for 1.25 years)(I think that's what the math says, I did this in my head and didn't double-check on a calculator)
On a side note, assuming these calculations are correct, Celestia could've drastically reduced her waiting time by vacationing in the human world for a while.
Assuming lowest calculation possible, that's 1.3 months for a portal opening, meaning nine portal openings to a year, meaning per human year, 22.5 Equestrian years pass. 1000/22.5 is about 44.5 years.
Meanwhile, assuming highest calculation is accurate, that's 3 months for a portal opening, meaning four portal openings to a year, meaning per human year, 10 Equestrian years pass. 1000/10 = 100 years.
<(TL;DR: Would you say the human world experiences time dilation in relation to Equestria? If so, how much? Also: Math.)
[PS: Sorry for the math+rant. This has been bugging me for a while]
3534128
Well, it's better then me never noticing, thanks
loving it!!!
I have to say that the only problem I have with this is expected Ethan to pop a pulse grenade as soon as he caught SS to stop her magic. I mean that's what he did all the other times he wanted to stop a unicorn and he did it quite frequently too.
3534805
(Blame me for forgetting about that at the time of writing)
Oh my god this is going to hilarious.
I have to say... i did not see this coming... BRAVO!
EQUESTRIA GIRLS: with Ethan IM DONE HERE *flips table*IM SOOOOO DONE HERE
Genius! That line me laugh out loud and even now I can't stop chuckling from even thinking about it!
3533208 you sir....just made 2 things occur..first was my mind bluescreened because while im decent at math all of that together was confusing to me and second....about 2 seconds ofter blue screening my mind exploded....bravo...I've only ever had them happen one at a time never one filled immediatly by another, good show!....also.....my head hurts now.........
P.S no one said there eould be math!
It would be hilarious if Celestia disarmed Ethan and he is going to go into Equestria Girls Wasteland. What not even get to keep 10 mm pistol?