- Member Since 22nd Dec, 2011
- offline last seen Aug 31st, 2023
Gabriel LaVedier
Just another University-edicated fanfiction writer who prefers the cheers and laughter of ponies to madness and sorrow.
Gabriel LaVedier
Joined 22nd Dec, 2011 ·
Offline
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- Gabriel LaVedier · 9.2k words · 38 4 · 717 views
- meep288 · 1k words · 75 18 · 4.6k views
- Nom_deCheval · 5.6k words · 70 8 · 1.7k views
Featured In6
Clopfics11,535 stories ·15,806 members
- Crossbreed My Heart872 stories ·977 members
Bronystories Fan Club68 stories ·212 members
- warning: cum inflation, belly bulging, huge insertion, gangbanging, etc. ahead3,884 stories ·3,602 members
Stories on Goodreads28,595 stories ·492 members
- Bestial Lust67 stories ·334 members
Stats
Page generated in 0.108 seconds
Total duration
1,019 users online
2,145,910 hits today, 2,561,572 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Interesting.
And now I have the old Dragnet theme in my head. Dammit
away form. away from.
heard by the lights. heard but the lights.
pus off. push off.
Now normally I'd be crowing at you for this, but the story and the description are telling me that at very least something odd is going on. I'm going with a couple who get their rocks off pulling these scenes, maybe with a hint of giving lazy, pansy-ass ponies a lesson in acting in a crisis.
3621014
Dang. Even with a collaborator there are a few errors.
You may be right, and it will be seen in a weeks's time. You won't be disappointed in this story.
3620510
Just wait for the next act.
The story description has me intrigued. I look forward to seeing how this develops.
3621728
I hope the next Act keeps you entertained.
3621657
Eh, two errors in 10k words isn't bad. It's nice to see you writing again.
3622327
Well, having to move in December plus frequently going to help take care of my aunt while she undergoes chemo kills the ability to write. But I need to buckle down and write some more.
3624776
Well it's nice that you've found the time again with all that you are dealing with.
Eagerly awaiting more.
3621657
My editing skills have failed you.
3625144
Feck, I missed them too. I mean, I've found errors in published books. As the old saying goes, "Even Homer nods."
You're a good man, and always up for everything.
3627172 3625144
This story remind me of Criminal Minds you should watch it a nice show.
3628469
I know of the show. But like the notes say I was really going for more of a 'Dragnet' feel.
Ah. Well, that certainly changes things. Looks like the next chapter will be a Rashamon of sorts. Should be most interesting.
Also:
Irony so thick you could make nails out of it.
3652225
Nope. Sincerity. I don't buy the new irony and insincerity movements. I'm a Sincerity fellow. It's true that one need not examine subtext in children's shows. If someone does, that's their business.
As for the next chapter, less Rashamon, more perspective. Does a Diamond Dog honestly think about the world itself like a pony would? A good consideration.
3652431
I didn't mean irony in the Dave Strider-esque, insincere sense. Just that you say what you did about children's shows in a My Little Pony fanfiction that opens with serial sexual assault. If that isn't ironic, what is?
Also, writing from the canine perspective? Don't see that very often. Looking forward to it even more!
3653047
To be fair, yes, you have something of a point in that way. However, Racham is still correct because "serial sexual assault" is not a subtextual point in the show. Children's shows exist as themselves and only that. There is no need for extreme interpretations like, say, Kkat did to justify the atrocities in Fallout: Equestria. The trope "Everyone is Jesus in Purgatory" need not be invoked because a plain reading of the plots is sufficient. One need not ask "What did they mean by that on a deeper level?" Though one may if they want to chase their own personal ghosts.
Yes, the non-pony perspective. Typically reserved for Changelings and Dragons, I'm giving Dogs a turn because, aside from Rust, I seem to be their biggest advocates.
The need. They need.
Ha, mostly right it seems, at least in the basics of the story. This is getting quite interesting indeed.
3660572
Just you wait for the next story. With the interesting view from the Dog perspective it should cast an interesting eye on pony culture.
3661228
I forgot to mention the very appropriate Hebrew names.
3662147
Thank Bronystories. I was stuck on the names and asked Bronystories if he had any ideas. He did, with some completely thematically appropriate Hebrew names, including one that let me get in a cute Pogo reference.
3625144
Great names.
3669656
Thanks!
Fantastic. I especially like the Diamond Dog folklore about cutie marks. I never really thought what other species would make of magical ass tattoos before now. Also, an interesting choice in making griffins Celtic. I usually see a more Germanic flavor with them, but this works too.
Oh, and Martha and Query were exceptional.
In all, a great introduction to our second protagonist. Looking forward to more, whatever it may be.
3681413
The Cutie Mark part was Bronystories contribution. It rather is a brilliant bit of world-building. The rest of the Diamond Dog cultural bits are mine. Being familiar with Changelings is meant to be significant in a world sense, that they have their hives underground like the Dogs have their colonies and so are fmailiar with one another while they regard ponies are somewhat alien. Query and Martha are two of my favorite throwaways so far
Bonus in that I kept up the "Rust" tradition of naming Dogs after earth dogs. Peg from "Lady and the Tramp", and Martha from "Martha Speaks." Double bonus in that Martha is voices by Tabatha St. Germaine.
I can't help but think that this is a pair of awfully self-righteous folks who found each other there; and that I like neither of them particularly. Fortunately, that's not been required to enjoy the story so far.
3682091
Less self-righteous, more confused about some motivations. Though Hepzibah is sincere in her worldview. It's just the Dog perspective. It's legitimate for her to think that way.
Normally, I have at least a little bit of a complex opinion on new chapters of fics I like, but after this all I can think is: moar!
I love the euphemisms.
3683642
Oddly enough, despite the fact that I want to encourage intellecualism and complex responses to something of this nature, I very much like that you have such an enthusiastic reaction.
3684335
You mean all the Diamond Dog swearing?
3685428
Canine Clam Cleaner, that cracked me up.
3688465
Again, Bronystories. I originally had the slightly simpler "Bitch burrower" there. If a statement looks like it's meant more as a sexual joke than anything else, it was probably him. It really feels odd; Dogs don't have the same common experience with shellfish that topsiders would. It's a nice bit of alitteration, and it's comedic. I don't question it, though. I just write.
3689492
Well mollusks live lots of different places, and there are underground rivers and lakes so having a cave dwelling bivalve is possible.
3692836
This is true. I was reminded of that right after I posted the comment.
Stories like this make me feel awkward when, as it is at the present, I have nothing incredibly meaningful or insightful to offer in response to one, or to a new chapter. These two are an incredible couple--by no means perfect--and it was a fun ride seeing how they went from a relatively sedate life together to beginning those rather dark public performances. With characters different, the entire concept might well fall apart, but this chapter, I think moreso than any before it, has shown that they are wonderfully suited to it, even if Hepsibah is understandably reluctant about it. The little bumps in the road and her hesitance paint a far more convincing picture.
But really, it boils down to: I like it. Another!
I knew that that's what he was driving at.
I'm still not sure what to think of them. I can sort of understand where they're coming from, yet what they do is way worse than what disgusted Racham in his career. And decidedly selfish—all those ponies he whips into a frenzy are merely tools to make him feel better about himself.
3742970
Thank you much! Yes, they really are suited to one another. That was an important element that I wanted to highlight. Were they not so well-fitted they would never have made it. Bronystories suggested more internal conflict but I knew I had to give them great concordance, or else the "rape" scenes would fall apart. They're a good couple gone sideways. They love each other a lot (with small bumps, like getting Tempus) but their personal recreation involves external validation of weird stuff
3743146
There's an ironic spate of genre blindness. Racham the actor can't seem to see he's violating the sensibilities of others in order to prove that they punish violations and he thinks he's the good guy. Hepzibah is also to blame. She's half the problem. And she's also selfish. She wants an external validation of her "sexiness" and of her worth. Doing this probes she's not only a valid sexual target inthe eyes of the pony majority, but can be fit into their conception of acceptability for "damsel in distress" status. They rescue her because they think she is worthy of rescue. Both of them are using the public, while convinced they're performing a public service. Oddly, both the selfless and selfish interpretations can be seen as valid.
This is an extremely powerful paragraph. It's certainly the closest thing available to a thesis of Racham's character, and it's very well done.
Hepzibah isn't as thoroughly explored. She's well developed, and you've pointed it out in the comments, but I just didn't see enough from her point of view (or perhaps I just identified too well with Racham). I hope she gets more thoroughly explored in later chapters. All the later chapters. All thousand of them.
(PS: Is it pronounced "rack-em" or... ?)
Little Pet Shop, did not expect that scene in this. The wee puppy joke, ha! The list of passive pets expands: Gummy, Tank, Tempus.
So they look like the Red Cricket in WoW?cdn.warcraftpets.com/images/pets/big/red-cricket.v7384.jpg
I only takes time. It only takes time.
as her slowly. as he slowly.
comforting stroking. comfortingly stroking.
used one and. used one hand.
as the lounged. as they lounged.
we tired. we tried.
form her legs. from her lips.
more of the. more on the.
spell form his. spell from his.
You really got Racham's issues down pat. I think all of us have some variation on his thoughts, whatever flavor of deviance it may be. The good among us, at very least, too wish to play out our own personal kinks only with consent and no harm to come to pass, however wrong it may appear to others.
3748253
I developed both of them the best I could but I claim a bit more closeness with Racham's discomfort with 'dark' inclinations. I don't know if you ever read the story "Not another Rapefic" but the protagonist has some level of that personal self-loathing and discomfort. BUT, he handwaves lack of informed consent under the blanket of "implied consent semi-rape will save this character" and it makes things (ironically) MORE skeevy because he tries to justify it, rather than just being a proper monster.
Hepzibah is in some sense my feeling of minority. Objectively I exist as one of several categories of minority in American society (Hispanic, bisexual, atheist, socialist, heck, even Brony) and yet a lot of that is mitigated. I look mostly quasi-ethnic at best and am a majority minority (I live in a majority Hispanic area) so most of my difference is internal. Contrast with Hepzibah who looks like an outsider. I've written her the best I can but lack a deep experience as "the other."
It's "rak-AHM" with emphasis on the last syllable (and the first 'a' sounding like 'had') or "rakahm" with no emphasis as in the original Hebrew.
3748402
Again, Bronystories added the wee puppy joke. It seemed like a good fit so I kept it. I'm glad I did.
A bit like that but move the antennae down in front of the eyes, remove all the spines and add purely cosmetic smooth mandibles. I like to think he's a nice touch. Much like Gummy and Tank can genuinely add to the richness and depth of the show Tempus adds a charming and homey domesticity to what is, ultimately, a story about shocking deviancy. Also: "Littlest Pet Shop" has grown on me so I had to sneak in a reference somewhere.
As I referenced in a comment below, sometimes we think like the protagonist in "Not another Rapefic." Sometimes we are disgusted by our deviancy but we indulge in the fiction anyhow, but still include as many "escape hatches" as possible even though it's fantasy. (Said protagonist nerfed himself when he wrote "rape her gently" under a comment asking what he would do to a bound Celestia.) It's not a perfect example, as the very real issue of informed vs implied consent came up and the story took a very skeevy position on the question. But in the main it was good and you are very right. It may look weird to do RP or similar that has "good ends" where the standard is "bad ends" but it serves well. (I once did a thing with a Diamond Dog and captive mare that ended up in a fluffy, cute lounging scene in an underground hot spring.)
how the fuck do you rape a diamond dog? i mean if you haven't noticed, those things are rather big bulky bastards. even the smallest one shown looked like it could turn a human into a pretzel.
Turn yourself in next, Racham. You and your lover both. Anything else is more lies on top of cowardice.
3789757
There's a bit of a rule of funny going on that ponies may be stronger than Dogs (Rarity pulled carts that the Dogs struggled with). Plus Racham has been described as very large and strong, while Hepzibah is weaker by virtue of being an academic.
3789974
They won't, for one very important reason: Hepzibah has a career, that she has striven towards her whole life. She is a doctor, and that is not to be thrown away lightly.
ugliness from his past are proven. ugliness from his past is proven.? Neither entirely sound right.
Hos hoof. His hoof.
to teat her. to treat her.
to to do. two to do.
kicks the. kicks, the.
Guys hanging out in alleys do tend to be the unsavory sort. And here I thought they were going to pull a superhero and tie them up in a dumpster before calling the cops on them.
3789974
Why would they turn themselves in in the first place? What would that even accomplish? Racham already gave the detectives the clues they need to close the case.