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shortskirtsandexplosions

Joined September 2011
3,955 followers

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Stories (53)

  • The Numbers Don't Lie
    An ancient magical artifact causes floating lie meters to appear above everypony's heads. This causes Twilight to reflect on honesty and friendship. Based on an idea by theworstwriter.

    20,101 words · 13,925 views · 2,093 likes · 28 dislikes
  • Couchtavia
    Octavia's new to Ponyville, and she just bought a used couch. As it turns out, she has to move the heavy thing clear across town on her lonesome. That isn't the problem. The problem is these damn crazy ponies who won't stop pesterin
    15,350 words · 6,469 views · 813 likes · 14 dislikes
  • Daring Dam
    A.K. Yearling has writer's block. Perhaps her pony friends can help her.
    8,308 words · 1,332 views · 249 likes · 2 dislikes
  • Nopony Needs to Know
    Applejack finally accepts Rainbow's invitation to experience flight, but for what reason?
    9,322 words · 8,581 views · 780 likes · 16 dislikes
  • The End of Ponies
    527,556 words · 21,013 views · 1,728 likes · 47 dislikes
  • Background Pony
    432,377 words · 55,773 views · 4,619 likes · 145 dislikes
  • Hello, Sedna
    7,297 words · 7,744 views · 871 likes · 21 dislikes
  • Spelling It Out
    16,839 words · 8,677 views · 727 likes · 19 dislikes
  • Something Like Feeling
    6,641 words · 3,804 views · 526 likes · 13 dislikes
  • To the Wind
    14,896 words · 3,461 views · 393 likes · 9 dislikes

Blog Posts (184)


It's just six mares in a wagon enjoying a crisp autumn day.  Maybe a little too much...

First Published
3rd Nov 2013
Last Modified
3rd Nov 2013

Comments ( 53 )

#1 · 24w, 4d ago · 6 · 1 ·

Is this what I think it is?

#2 · 24w, 4d ago · 8 · ·

I always seem to be looking at something related to Austraeoh when you post a new story.

#3 · 24w, 4d ago · 13 · 4 ·

So what we get drunk?

So what we smoke weed?

We just havin' fun.

We don' care who sees.

#4 · 24w, 4d ago · 5 · 1 ·

>>3435102 this is behind the scenes of Austraeoh

#5 · 24w, 4d ago · 1 · ·

This. Yes.

#6 · 24w, 4d ago · 1 · ·

._. okay

#7 · 24w, 4d ago · 3 · ·

Pfffftttt.

So much dialogue and topic changes...

Nice ending, too.

~Skeeter The Lurker

#8 · 24w, 4d ago · 2 · ·

>>3435120 The Austaeoh Continuum.

#9 · 24w, 4d ago · 2 · ·

        "Don't mind us, Rainbow," Twilight said with a smile. "We're just enjoying a wagon ride, talking about past autumn experiences and fall fashion—"

        "I was talking about fall fashion!" Twilight harumphed. "Everypony else apparently wishes to discuss bad jokes and the implications of pegasi potty-training."

Bit of a typo there. Better join the ponies in the shame car wagon.

#11 · 24w, 4d ago · · ·

  I am just going to go sit in a corner and cry-laugh for a bit, if that's okay.

  This story earned a like with 1 line alone:

"Saddle green is made of ponies"

SSAE, you did it again. Enjoy your well-deserved Burger King.

#12 · 24w, 4d ago · 3 · 1 ·

I am utterly confused as to how the featured box works.

#13 · 24w, 4d ago · 4 · ·

Sweet little story :)

#14 · 24w, 4d ago · 2 · ·

i just came here to say

DAT TITLE

#15 · 24w, 4d ago · · ·
#16 · 24w, 4d ago · · 1 ·

>>3435120

It is though

#17 · 24w, 4d ago · · ·

Surely you cant be serious. I am serious, and Im frank also.

:pinkiehappy:

Comment posted by Quylaa deleted at 2:45am on the 3rd of November, 2013
#19 · 24w, 4d ago · · 1 ·

An entertaining read, but, and i mean this in the kindest way possible, it kinda felt sub-standard. Especially Rarity's dialog felt very forced. Also a very minor case of Lavender Unicorn Syndrome and a few general mistakes. I only mention those because it is unusual for you.

Also, references. References everywhere. :pinkiecrazy:

#20 · 24w, 4d ago · 1 · ·

I was expecting them to be blazing... Or am I so drunk that I just read this wrong?

#21 · 24w, 4d ago · 6 · ·

>>3435966

>>3436732

Perhaps he was high while writing it?

#22 · 24w, 4d ago · 9 · ·

Break out the cider Applejack, everypony's gone off the wagon.

*Ducks barrage of Tomatoes*

#23 · 24w, 4d ago · 1 · 1 ·

Tell me, Princess, what time of year is it?"

        "Uhm..." Twilight fidgeted. "Fall?"

        "You betcha!"

Such panache. Well executed, Applejack. :ajsmug: There is so much charming wit between these characters, but mostly on her part. I also really enjoyed Twilight's recollection of her Nightmare Night memories. That little passage contained enough good feelings for an entire Calvin and Hobbes volume.

haunted lanterns, evil grasshoppers—the works!"

So she was reading Equestria Daily...the local newspaper.

I couldn't help but read all of Fluttershy's dialogue in FiMFlamFilosophy's pathetic, dismal Fluttershy voice, since I had just watched his latest video; unfortunately, his parody had no Spike (the best fanon Spike ever conjured, imo), and for the same reason, I could only appreciate this fic as much as Friendship is Wet. The show is about friendship, not friendship confined by demographics, and it sucks when the one member of their group who doesn't fit into either of the races he's associated with misses out on time spent with his only friends.

"Well, I figured I was carrying us all home," Applejack said. "But now with the lot of us here, I reckon we should make somethin' of it."

Yes, now that all the ponies are there, completing their ethnically cleansed, aesthetically-balanced unit, they should turn it into a bonding experience. Never mind that they're the only close companions of a very absent dragon ... He should slip a pea under Twilight's mattress whenever this type of thing happens.

#24 · 24w, 4d ago · · ·

>>3436915

you could be right.. I don't blaze anymore... But still

#25 · 24w, 4d ago · · ·

I... am not too sure about what i just read. Dangnamit, SS&E, mai closure .___.

On the subject, this feels like one of those inconsistent ones, with alternating patches of bore and great with a lot of oddity in between. References galore, some equally awesome/awkward jokes, a whole lotta atmosphere. I'm not sure where I stan with this, but I'm pretty sure you enjoyed writing it, so good on ya for going with it.

#26 · 24w, 4d ago · 1 · 9 ·

Seems to be a big night of down votes for me, so time for the third constructive critique of the evening.

I personally didn't care much for this story, because the characterizations felt off. It's really hard to put a finger on just what it was, but I found myself reminded of Quentin Tarentino's "Death Car." I understand how fun dialogue focused character pieces can be, but it was almost as though the ponies were dialed up to eleven in a bad way. Dash was an ass, so was Applejack, even Fluttershy was irritating, Twilight was bland and rambling, and the rest of the ponies never once struck a chord that made me think, "I would not hit this pony with a shovel."

I had the same sensation when I read "Hills Like White Elephants" though, so maybe it's just me.

#27 · 24w, 4d ago · 17 · ·

10K+ words... and nothing happened.

I love it.

#28 · 24w, 4d ago · 1 · ·

Can't say I enjoyed it very much. Lots and lots of dialogue with no real events to the story beyond the careening cart. I get it, I do-- writing something relaxing can be theraputic and certainly settle a worried heart. That's what I think the author was going for, a sort of 'pleasant nothing' that makes you smile with the relaxing bits. It just wasn't my cup of tea, I suppose.

#29 · 24w, 4d ago · 10 · 7 ·

>>3437096

Spike is useless.

#30 · 24w, 4d ago · 5 · ·

Pfft. Pinkie was just amazing. :pinkiehappy:

And this:

"It's either this or get smashed to bits like pumpkins!" Twilight retorted.

"Hey!" Pinkie grinned and shouted above the tumult. "Siamare's Dream! I love that album!"

Oh God, yes.

#31 · 24w, 3d ago · 1 · ·

As hard as it is to believe from a writer of your caliber, I found an error.

"Snkkkt—Heh heh heh heh..." Twilight slapped the ground and practically doubled over. "Glad you got a chance to use yer noggin' too, Yer Highness! Heh heh heh..."

I think Applejack was supposed to say that.

#32 · 24w, 3d ago · 3 · ·

This was pretty nice. :ajsmug:

But seriously though. SOMEONE EXPLAIN THE LAKE HOUSE.

#33 · 24w, 3d ago · · 2 ·

>>3439287 It's where the female Wonderbolts convene with their baby dragon pimp.

#34 · 24w, 3d ago · · ·

>>3439315

Harr harr. Looking for origin here.

#35 · 24w, 3d ago · · ·

>>3439404 Best you take issue with Rhulain too, then.

#36 · 24w, 3d ago · 1 · ·

This was a nice slice of life and then Pinkie came and ruined everything.

#37 · 24w, 3d ago · · ·

... So no MOAR? I'd like moar. Would anyone else like moar? I'd like moar :raritystarry:

#38 · 24w, 3d ago · · ·

>>3438470

Want know. Real album name. Band. Specific song that was referenced. Please. :twilightsmile:

Never mind found it myself.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d1acEVmnVhI

#39 · 24w, 3d ago · · ·

>>3435102

Everything ever written somehow pertains to Austraeho, even if it hasn't been written yet. ICC saw to that.

#40 · 24w, 3d ago · · ·

Very, very good! :twilightsmile:

#41 · 24w, 3d ago · · ·

Gawd, I love slice of life stories so much. And you're so good at them, too. This pleases me deeply.

I read stories about headless horses, olden ponies, leathery-winged foalnappers, haunted lanterns, evil grasshoppers—the works!"

Oh, you.

"A wild Rarity appears!"

I laughed harder at this than I should have...

"Oh, that?" Pinkie Pie grinned with her eyes shut. "I got mauled by a bear on the way over!"

And that made me spit out my drink. Goddammit.

"I swear, Pinkie! I'm gonna pull such a prank on you that you'll turn white and grow wings to fly for the hills!"

"Oh, wouldn't that be a surprise?! Heeheehee!"

The image of Rainbow being afraid of the ground is adorable. Is there really a fic about that? Because if so, I must find it!

This was nice. Again, inexplicable down-votes. I wonder if the title worked against it in that regard...

#42 · 24w, 3d ago · · ·

>>3437993 Actually...

Claws on axle, head braced against wagon's bottom, feet fixed downward. As long as he kept his grip on the axle and his body rigid, he could have made a more effective brake system than a tough-as-nails archeologist.

#43 · 24w, 2d ago · 2 · 1 ·

>>3443875

true. and By rectally inserting your hand, you could take advantage of his dragon-ness to use him as a handy over-mitt

#44 · 24w, 2d ago · 1 · ·

>>3436915 To be honest, I can't help but think that he's ALWAYS high whenever he's writing... or just always high, period.

#45 · 24w, 2d ago · · ·

Hehe. I live in Neigh Canterlina.

Go Tar Hooves!

#46 · 24w, 2d ago · 1 · ·

>>3439287 Read his "Friendship is Wet"

#47 · 24w, 2d ago · · ·

"Awwwwwww..." Rarity cooed. "That sounds terrible and yet adorable all at once! Just imagine, a scampy young Rainbow Dash, afraid of putting her hooves on the ground." She turned towards Twilight. "Someone should write a story about it."

        "Uhhh... actually, I think somebody already has..."

Actually it is already wrote by someone here

#48 · 24w, 2d ago · 1 · ·

"I swear, Pinkie! I'm gonna pull such a prank on you that you'll turn white and grow wings to fly for the hills!"

        "Oh, wouldn't that be a surprise?! Heeheehee!"

Ba dm TSH!! :rainbowlaugh:

Obvious digs at imaginary friends aside, is there going to be a second chapter to this? Because seriously, this is really nice. Very quaint evening with the Mane 6 (all of whom are beautifully in character, I might add), shenanigans occur and they wind up at a lakeside house. Scary stories are told around a fire before they all bunk down for the night, only for more shenanigans to ensue (possibly Fluttershy waking up in the middle of the night and becoming spooked by her overactive imagination?). Again, very nicely done, SS&E. Very nicely done, indeed. :raritywink:

#49 · 24w, 2d ago · · ·

>>3445152

...a valid point.

#50 · 24w, 23h ago · · ·

Well played, SS&E.

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