• Member Since 11th Oct, 2011
  • offline last seen 3 hours ago

Pascoite


I'm older than your average brony, but then I've always enjoyed cartoons. I'm an experienced reviewer, EqD pre-reader, and occasional author.

T

Twilight Sparkle has defeated Discord, but she lacked the discipline to do a proper job of it. He's ready for a rematch, but he's recruited three ponies to be his unwitting minions, and nopony will know he's behind it until it's too late. Everypony is in for some serious mind games.

Chapters (5)
Comments ( 49 )

D'awww at Sweetie Bell crying when told to do that lol

whenever i read, my mind ives the characters voices and a little soundtrack thing. but thats just me. coo story btw. a beast tamer sweetie bell sounds awesome.

let's see where this goes shell we

Wow, I'm loving this so far! :heart::twilightsmile:

When I read I can always hear voices and see images in my head.
Excelent story, can't wait for more.

Thanks for the comments.

BTW, gladly accepting cover art if anypony feels inspired. I did a 15 min. rush sketch to try and get this posted quickly, and it may be a while before I take enough time to draw something worthwhile. Plus, there are many better artists out there than I am.

Ok, got this posted at Equestra Daily today and getting hammered over there. Apparently this isn't unusual in the early going, but it's going on longer than I expected. And just as I was getting close to finishing Chapter 2!

Anyway, please vote & leave comments folks! Even if they're negative. I need to know I'm writing this for more than 5 people before I invest the time in finishing it.

I'm mostly reading it in my own voice, although some of Twilight's and Discord's lines come to me in their own voices. Rarity's accent isn't something I'm too used to, and have a hard time knowing its applicability, and imagining an aged version of Sweetie Belle's voice expressed through emotions she's never really shown to be experiencing is hard for me as well. Hope this helps. Love the story, by the way.

12470

I'm actually feeling like maybe make a cover for it. Though an unrelated question. Is anybody going to die?:fluttercry:

12766

:yay: But, i'll see what i can come up. I think i'll have to sign up so that we could keep in touch.

"The alternative is to see how obedient the creature in question is when you ask it to please stop mauling you."
That line made me laugh out loud q: Great job so far, Pascoite. I'm loving it so far, and as long as Discord's vengeance against Fluttershy isn't too terrible I'll continue to enjoy this :p

Huh, intriguing idea. And for once I actually like how Discord is characterized rather than finding myself unable to focus due to thinking about what a jerk he is. Nicely done so far; I eagerly await more.

I wonder how far sweetie :unsuresweetie: bell will sink, in this building chain of unfortunate events.

You may read by the "Hooked on Phonics"-- or similar- style. I didn't, but in my experience, those who have to read phonetically read about half as fast as those who don't, while those who don't, only some can switch between only seeing words and/or hearing it too.

But, either hearing it only in their mind's voice or the character (or their interpertation of the character)'s voice; how many can vs can't, in either reading style; I do not know. Obviously, familiarity and appeal matter, and don't think it's been even anecdotally 'studied.'

I'd actually like to see more of this fic. :O I never expected Sweetie Belle to be the one working with Discord, but it makes the fic unique and interesting!

This is a darker Discord than I'd have expected, but that's also really intriguing. I like that you've managed to preserve a bit of his sense of humor, even with the darker characterization. So far so good, although I'm interested to see where you go with this given your decision to stray from grimdark. I saw you got some flack at EqD about one of the elements being so freely available -- honestly, that's what I'd be expecting after the Discord madness. It's not as if they were any safer at Canterlot, and I'd expect that Celestia would allow the bearers to keep them close given that should an emergency arise they'd be the only ones capable of wielding them.

I tend to force myself to read it in the character's voice, as I write fics too and it's useful for gauging how out of character a line might be; over the years it's become a habit. :twilightsmile:

15662 Honestly, I think I got beaten down over at EqD for the comedy tag, since the plot itself isn't funny. Plus, there's some knee-jerk bombing of dark. Pre-reader liked it, didn't have many changes to suggest.

WHEN IS THE NEXT ONE

Ooooo~ This is getting good, well, even better! :trixieshiftright:

I can't wait for more!:trollestia:

Ha, this is going to be interesting as I cannot wait to see how DIscord tries to break Fluttershy. I mean she is so easy, yet she is difficult to corrupt due to her overall kindness. :fluttershyouch:

Seriously, this is going to be some storyline. So please keep up the good work. :pinkiehappy:

Now things are getting intersting indeed as Discord messes with the minds of Rarity, Fluttershy and Twilight. :fluttercry:

I must say the emotional depth in this chapter is something else. As I cannot believe it could happen this way.:pinkiegasp:

Please do keep up the good work upon such a great storyline like this one.

"I’ll see you yet as a statue in my private collection!”
this bit seemed odd to me. he has stated before that he "doesn't turn ponies into stone", so i don't get why he'd change his mind. the second entrapment by the mane 6 wouldn't convince him to think different, as he has already spent >1000 years in stone thanks to celestia and he always sticks to his word and plays by the rules (he even seems to enjoy working around rules, so why would he suddenly break one of his own?)

21264 Discord never said he would be the one to do it.

Now this is an engagning storyline. :pinkiehappy:


I mean just Wow. A lot happen within one chapter that make things go from bad to even more bad as Discord finally reveals himself and his plans in action.

Various ponies lives are in danger if the Elements don't gather themselves together. :unsuresweetie:

Please do keep up the good work upon such a great working storyline. :twilightsmile:

I like this chapter, but it feels a bit rushed. Things just happen too fast with almost no build up between each scene.

MUAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA 8 D

Competent but not overconfident Discord, best Discord. :pinkiehappy:

The most dangerous opponent of all is a clever one. You have set a very interesting opening. Very interesting indeed.

-Nikola of Tesla
Head of Applied Magic, Canterlot Institute of Technology

I think this is fantastic. Unfortunately, there hasn't been an update in a month and that makes me :applecry:

Im really looking foward to more chapters of this! :pinkiehappy:

What was Discord's pose after getting turned back into stone a third time?

2174163
Only Luna knows for sure, and she isn't talking...

I scan the words when I read.
I don't have any trouble if I have to hear it, but that takes too long, so I just scan the words.

Great chapter btw!:pinkiehappy:

11031273
Oh jeez please don't tell me you read this.

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

11031688
Oh, not read yet, I'm only on chapter 2. :V

11031808
Why would you do this?

Eeh, it's not a bad story, but it's clearly a beginner's effort. Don't expect all the plot points to wrap up.

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

11031829
As I recently said in another story's comments, sometimes it's nice to remember everyone had to start somewhere. :)

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

That was pretty badass.

I will say it was sublime to watch this story break every single rule I have only ever known you to be a stickler for. :V I may give you a ribbing, but this ain't too shabby a place to start from, y'know?

11039873
I haven't read the story myself since I posted the last chapter, I don't think, so I don't even know what rules it breaks anymore, except a few detailed grammar rules I hadn't learned yet and some plot threads I know I never concluded. On the other hand, I don't want to post one of those "yeah, this story is bad, I admit it" comments, because I don't like it when authors do that. Why actively dissuade people from reading a story? If you really don't want it visible, then unpublish it. No, it's not up to par with what I can do now, but it still may well suit some readers' tastes. I will cop to it being a newbie's "wait, you can write dark stories about MLP?"

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

11039990
Yeah, I'm real glad you didn't keep up with that trend. :B

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