Celestia finds herself bored and annoyed with the daily grind she has to go through, dealing with the over-privileged unicorns that come to whine about their problems. Though when an especially nasty couple begin their complaints, Rainbow Dash won't be having it. Mischief and loyalty follow.
An experimental Rainbow x Celestia fic, I hope you guys enjoy.
Many thanks to ShadowBlades for editing through this for me and helping make it better.
Much appreciation to Mysticalpha for the beautiful cover art as well.
Chapters (1)
This story needs continuing.... XD
3508272
I may do so in the future.
I would like to see more of this if that's ok with you
3508285
see 3508274
Interesting. More reason to kick the snot nose pricks teeth in
3508274
You definitely need to continue this. Maybe something with Celestia asking the guard she asked to deliver her letter why it never reached Rainbow Dash and then maybe throwing the two trash snobs in the dungeons for lying and stealing royal messages or some such
It's a nice fic and it's good to see this pairing getting more attention. I do feel that, while the grammar, descriptions and scenery is very good, that the dialogue (primarily for Celestia) feels a bit OOC, still quite a sweet story.
3508510
I'll agree with you. You have NO idea how hard I found it to keep Celestia regal and proper, while still playing at her impish nature.
3508522
Completely agreed, it's a very difficult thing to balance.
The fuckwits need to be punished
Regarding your summary: "As the annoyance and tediousness of work"
Try "tedium". Avoid nominalization to improve your writing.
3509254
I knew that there was a word like that. Thanks for reminding me.
this story has a few to many cus words in it...but i enjoy it nontheless
3511599
I like foul language...a lot...it's fun.
3511604 Oh yeah I do too, but you just kinda overdid it a bit, :) but I do love this shipping its like number 4 on my favorites XD
1: TwiDash
2: TwiPie
3:TwiLuna
4:Rainbowlestia
3511645
I can see Dash as a type who would take to swearing like a sailor, but that may just be me.
I've grown to really like this ship too after working on 2 fics of it.
3511650 I'm kind a biased on most of my shippings because I love Twilight so much XD but Rainbow Dash is such a good pony to ship others with that its hard to make a bad shipping for her, hell the only two ponies I don't like seeing shipping done with her are Rarity and Applejack and thats just because I don't like Rarity at all, and Applejack just seems like either she wouldn't swing that way or that she'd be with Fluttershy
3511654
)
I can make arguments for both those cases, but we're all entitled to our opinions, and that's what makes the community fun. As for me, Rainbow and Spitfire will always be the one closest to my heart. (But a little AppleDash on the side never hurt either.
3511657 Twidash will kinda always be my favorite, I love seeing how other authors make Twilight and Rainbow interact with each other XD
Oh look, a story where ponies can swear for fucking once. Also, I look forward to the possible sequel.
3514907
Aye, 'buck' always sounded really forced to me.
3514908 plus the fact they buck trees makes it sound stupid.
3514915
YUP!
Plus I swear like a sailor anyway and despise censorship quite a lot so...yeah.
Great story and excellent shipping. I hope to see more in the future.... so dont make me wait
Is it just me or Celestia seem a little off? That the only thing wrong with this.
3520675
see 3508522
3520678 Yea just a little to much Pinkie Pie.
3520686
Nah, If I was going Pinkie, it would have been WAY different.
I found it difficult to find the balance the natures here, and I'll be the first one to accept that she comes off as a bit out of character.
3520695 Still this was a nice story man. The first DashXTia ship I have seen good job.
This was really great. You wrote Celestia in a different way than most people do, and it wasn't unreal. Also, jet set deserved that kick.
As for the "experimental" pairing, I think it was a success.
3511604 I like sharp, pointy objects... They are fun to make staby time with!
\
~ Pinkamina
3546536
Cussing has been proven to ease pain! ...but I'll still die...
Thank you for using 'fuck' instead of 'buck.' This invention of the fandom's has been bugging me since day one.
And thank you again for writing Rainbow Dash/Celestia. I've been looking for my favorite pony ship for forever. I didn't recognize them in the conversations here though, save for when they were discussing about their feelings for and about each other. The profanity was also quite out of character if you consider it's never used in the show.
If you continue this, I'm curious what punishment Celestia will inflict upon Jet Set and Upper Crust. Benevolent as she is, she doesn't take kindly to such behaviors. Seeing him lose a few teeth was entertaining, at least.
You might want to read the guide on this site about said tags. You've got them confused. You also wrote 'it's' instead of 'its' quite often. And there's no need to both indent and skip a new line between paragraphs; one is enough. Speaking of skipped lines, I noticed some paragraphs lacked them.
Here are the lines I liked;
'With each flap, she brought herself and the blazing star higher,'
'Luna seemed much more invested in the topics brought before them, and even called a pony or two out when she felt they were trying to bullshit their way into getting more comforts,'
'He spoke as if she should be impressed,'
'How's this? Fuck you!"
Celestia had to honestly focus to prevent herself from laughing,'
'Rainbow gave a look of confusion as her ears drooped and she gave a look like a sad puppy that knew it had done something wrong. Celestia thought it was pretty adorable,'
'giving a stern look to try and keep that hurt puppy look upon Dash's face,'
'She squealed again and fell on her back, wiggling her hind legs as she thrust her forelegs into the air with a cheer,'
'"'Did you hear that the princess likes cake?' 'Well of course I did! Isn't that just shocking?' 'Oh absolutely! To think that perhaps she might actually enjoy something delicious and bear to be seen doing so. It just blows my little pony mind!' 'Mine too! I tried eating cake once and got fat! I think the princess might be fat!' 'I believe she's fat too! Oh how I'm so glad that I can feel better about myself now that I know that our leader is fat!'"'
'"Well, I've only been enjoying my sweets for a good thousand years, but poor old me, it all goes to my butt!" Celestia laughed right back, standing and pouting at her flank. "Then again, I've never heard any suitors complain." She said with a cheeky grin,'
'The pinks and oranges in the sky began to blend into the land below, painting it like a canvas of dirt, foliage and stone. It was as if the light was Celestia's brush, and each time the sun would droop lower, it brought together a new piece of artwork, darker, but just as beautiful as the last,'
''It is our duty, Sister! Thou should not whine about duty,'
'I'll be in disguise for the day to avoid anypony building any more negative actions onto my apparently growing record,'
'the lights under her hooves seeming to follow her,'
'"Soooooo...does that mean we can...like...I dunno...make out...or something?"'
and
'"You act as if I haven't a heart," Luna replied, almost offended.'
I also liked Celestia's rigged bet.
Here are the mistakes I found;
One 'rather' should be replaced with another word in 'A rather embarrassed mare looked rather insulted,'
'looking rather ashamed of herself' would be better served as 'who looked rather ashamed of herself' in 'she found herself in the throne room alone with Rainbow, looking rather ashamed of herself' to avoid confusion,
'he' should be 'her' in 'Celestia continued over he laughter,'
'Answered' shouldn't be capitalized in 'and like I said earlier, 'I got lost.'" Dash Answered,'
and
Samewise for 'Incredibly' in 'You're Incredibly fun when you wanna be, Tia!'
3568896
Well, since my net hasn't dropped yet, I'll respond to these, because I always like to return thoughts with intelligent critiques.
I agree with the 'buck' argument it just comes off as forced unsatisfying. I am also surprised how few Rainbow and Celestia fics are out there and it's what actually brought this on. Staying in character on this one was kinda difficult I'll admit, as for the swearing...Yeah I can see that but from the way I interpret Dash, I can see her as swearing quite a bit, or at least more than most characters.
Which tags? Character or genre? The skipped lines is just how I do things, and any that are forgotten are due to bad transfer from this, to gdocs, and back to this.
Seems we like some of the same lines, and I'll go through at some point and clean up the errors you put here, thanks.
3570311
By 'said tags', I mean these.
I get what you mean with Rainbow Dash being among the most likely to swear, but here it was a whole sudden bucket of cussing so it's slightly surprising, however deserved it was.
The 'indent/skipped line' is an 'official' thing. Not necessarily a question of life and death. The said tags I mentioned are more important, in my opinion. I won't kill a story, but it can surprise someone used to the traditional way.
3574046
I always screw that up. Thanks.
I loved this story. I have a weakness to Dash shipping as I ship her with nearly everypony. The only negative is that this suffers from one-shot syndrome. This is a problem that means basically that it could have been a bit longer and have more of a conflict. Jet Set and Upper Crust as the main antagonists or something. It was good as it was, but I really felt sad that it ended.
Though I prefer TwiDash (Celestia knows why) I like all Dash shipping. Your experment worked unless I am getting my words mixed up. Hopefully in the far flung future you may consider adding to this. CelestiaDash like Luna Dash is very rare and a beloved paring of mine. The rare parings are the best in my opinion. Spike Dash is also really good.
Never mind that there is no evidence on the show of it
I love primarily all of Dash's parings.... except Mac/Dash.... I don't ship him with anypony..... and I have some weird sort of grudge against his ships..... don't ask why..... It won't hurt a story but I don't go out of my way to find them
Good job sir!
MOAR!!!!
3711375
I'm looking forward to it as well!
D'aaaaAaaaawwwwwwwwwwww
Tia's in for some heart break in around 40-60 years, a mortal pony only lives so long.....
This was a good fic, especially as far as ships like these are concerned. Really liked how you portrayed their characters. Sure, some things here and there felt a little OOC, but they were nicely counterbalanced by other parts being in-character, and just cute in general. Plus a fairly uncommon ship like this always gets away with more than a more common ship would.
That, uh, yeah that's about all I have to say about it.
This was a pretty nice read but Dash seemed kinda foul mouthed.
4030504
I enjoy language, and Dash strikes me as an experienced cusser who'd make sailors blush. It's just my take.
4031102 Ah, that's understandable.
I don't have anything against it but it feels weird to imagine them actually doing it for me and trying to imagine Fluttershy telling Angel to fucking behave in a serious tone gives me a headache.
All I can hear is beeps trying to preserve her element.
4031387
Don't see Flutters cussing. Though AJ I imagine would on occassion...can't see the others of the six doing it often if at all though.
4032536 Quite true.
This story was rushed beyond all belief. There were so many important conversations reduced down to a single explanatory sentence, so many character traits I wanted to see fleshed out. That being said, I would be lying if I said the fic wasn't heartwarming, and I can't bring myself to downvote it. It would be one of my favorites if I had the same story, only four times longer.
4058596
I feel the exact same way, but the fact that it's a one-shot keeps it that way. It was only an experiment, and if you truly feel that way, I may do some expansion in the future.
4058607
I thought that might have been what you meant by "experimental". If you did expand upon it, I would definitely keep up with and read it, but it has to be something you'd be inspired to do. I know how much of a drag it can be to work on a fic that has lost its luster to yourself, but then again, I do have a pretty bad case of ADD. Thanks for the offer, and let me know if that's what you decide to do!