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GentlemanJ 10230

Joined February 2012
973 followers

    GentlemanJ's Stories (10)

    • Lazy Summer Days
      Life's not just for adventures. Sometimes, the best stories happen on lazy summer days.

      18,887 words · 3,565 views · 443 likes · 6 dislikes
    • Trouble Meets Disaster
      Marshal Graves gets settled in, but is called away on duty. Oddly enough, Sweetie Belle tags along.
      13,360 words · 4,079 views · 470 likes · 8 dislikes
    • Two Kinds of Complications
      Rarity wants a date. Sweetie Belle wants a brother. Lucky Graves just wants a day without headaches.
      14,369 words · 4,196 views · 466 likes · 8 dislikes
    • So... What Happens Next?
      Ordered to stay in Ponyville, Graves finds that his new life will take some getting used to.
      6,684 words · 4,371 views · 474 likes · 9 dislikes
    • Untangling the Knot
      21,524 words · 3,648 views · 461 likes · 9 dislikes
    • Return to the Gala
      38,483 words · 5,338 views · 519 likes · 12 dislikes
    • When the Man Comes Around
      21,936 words · 10,215 views · 628 likes · 16 dislikes
    • Spring Fever
      2,364 words · 3,640 views · 277 likes · 5 dislikes
    • Happily Ever After
      22,948 words · 3,502 views · 457 likes · 16 dislikes
    • A Long, Winding Road
      43,497 words · 1,535 views · 299 likes · 14 dislikes

    The second story in The Journey of Graves.

    With the rogue marshals dealt with and order restored, Graves has received instructions to stay and protect the town from wild creatures that have moved into the Everfree Forest. Only, what's a man of action supposed to do when there's absolutely nothing to do? With some help from his new friends, Graves will learn what it means to settle down in Ponyville.

    First Published
    2nd Mar 2012
    Last Modified
    7th Mar 2012

    Comments ( 70 )

    #1 · Chapter 2 · 64w, 17h ago · · ·
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    A very good story! Apart from the odd spelling mistake (e.g.: by instead of bye) it's very well-written. You have my full attention now sir! I shall track.

    #2 · Chapter 2 · 64w, 17h ago · · ·
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    >>282081

    Aha! Found and rectified. Thanks for the tip, good sir: hope to see you around!

    #3 · Chapter 2 · 64w, 13h ago · · 2 ·
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    Another pointless "humanified" story. (a "humanified" tag needs to be added to the list, so people can tell when a story is about humans in Ponyville and when it's just about humans.) What does this add to the story? NOTHING. What does it take away? The point of the whole series, which is right in the title: my little PONIES.

    If you want to do Pony fanfics, do fanfics about PONIES.

    If you want to do stories about humans, do them someplace other than a board meant for Pony fanfics.

    #4 · Chapter 2 · 64w, 12h ago · 2 · ·
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    >>282632

    I'm sorry you feel that way. I posted it here because I like the characters and wanted to write with them. I also felt like making them humans would give me a little more creative flexibility. If your main issue is with this, then I hope you'll at least give my stories a chance, be it about humans or ponies.

    #5 · Chapter 2 · 64w, 3h ago · · ·
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    Yes!! I was worried you were just going to stop writing. Keep up the good work. I did notice you describe graves movement in the orchard as troting dont know if it's intentional or not

    #6 · Chapter 2 · 64w, 47m ago · · ·
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    >>283805

    I like to vary up words, and trotting in my mind is a form of light jog. the fact that it's a bit pony-esque is just icing on the cake. :twilightsmile:

    And yes, I hope to be update a chapter or two every week, which should give me enough time to write the next segment. Thanks for the support!

    #7 · Chapter 3 · 63w, 3d ago · · ·
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    Great story, please continue.

    #8 · Chapter 3 · 63w, 3d ago · · ·
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    >>294844

    Will, do, thanks! :twilightsmile: Have you checked out the first story in the series?

    #9 · Chapter 3 · 63w, 3d ago · · ·
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    Yes, It's just as good as this one!>>294958

    #10 · Chapter 3 · 63w, 3d ago · · ·
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    >>294988

    It's people like you who keep me writing. Thanks so much!

    #11 · Chapter 4 · 60w, 6d ago · · ·
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    I love your stories...please don't stop writing

    #12 · Chapter 4 · 60w, 5d ago · · ·
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    >>363628

    Not for a long, long time yet. :raritywink:

    #13 · Chapter 4 · 60w, 3d ago · · ·
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    I've read the first one and the second one now and I must say... This is very good

    #14 · Chapter 4 · 57w, 6d ago · · ·
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    At first this seemed like a series of pointless character-interaction scenes, but I see the real conflict and arc in the story now. I like!

    Not quite as plotted as the first story, but touching on the real substance of the show and Graves's character.

    #15 · Chapter 4 · 57w, 6d ago · · ·
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    >>452447

    I like to mix things up. Some adventure here, a little slice of life there, spice it up with some comedy, drama, and romance, for an overall delicious product. Glad you enjoy it!

    #16 · Chapter 2 · 54w, 4h ago · · ·
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    so many funny one-liners i like this story.

    #17 · Chapter 3 · 54w, 4h ago · · ·
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    no offence to graves but he is so not looking in to the deeper meaning, how you describe him he sounds like a good looking guy. no wonder flutter shy and apple jack wanted to spent more time with him. BTW avian terrorist tactics, i lol so hard. love your writing keep up the good work.

    #18 · Chapter 4 · 50w, 6d ago · · ·
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    HOW THE HELL DOES THIS HAVE SO LITTLE VIEWS!?

    #19 · Chapter 2 · 49w, 5d ago · · ·
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    >>282632

    @RealityCheck

    And if you want to read fics about ponies, don't read the ones tagged 'human'.  You clearly don't want to read humanizations and as you said, if you wanted to read stories about humans, you'd go to another damn site.  Your comment said nothing about the quality of the story, which in my opinion was quite good.  Not that you care.  Also not sure why you made it to chapter 2 of the second story in the series to realize it was a humanized fic.  Plus, the fact that they are ponies has almost nothing to do with the series.  I realize that Unicorns and Pegasi play a big part here, but that aside, my BLIND sister enjoy 'watching' MLP plenty for the characters and the story and she gets the same feelings of happiness and enjoyment that every other brony out there does.  

    #20 · Chapter 2 · 45w, 6d ago · 1 · ·
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    I personally loved the line "Graves rampaging like an angry debt collector" xD

    #21 · Chapter 4 · 45w, 6d ago · · ·
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    Ahahahah! " Graves had just given everyone there a free pony" it's funny because they're all... >> << VV >> ...It was funny! ...deal with it! :pinkiecrazy:

    #22 · Chapter 4 · 45w, 5d ago · · ·
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    Have you considered adding a link to the next installements in each of the Graves stories?

    #23 · Chapter 2 · 45w, 4d ago · · ·
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    Though not quite as adept at physically assaulting plant matter, Graves found that stomping the trees as he would when kicking down a door worked quite well. Thus, with Applejack sailing through the air and Graves rampaging like an angry debt collector, the ripe apples were knocked down and collected.

    I love this little bit here; just the phrasing and everything was rather humorous.

    He didn’t get it, but something about Applejack’s smile bothered him. It was as if she was somehow disappointed, but that didn’t make sense. They’d finished picking all the apples, hadn’t they?

    Was it was because he couldn’t stick around and help with the barn repairs? Maybe that was it, but he’d already spent too much time here already.

    You repeated 'already' in that last sentence. I like how Graves is missing the point; Applejack wanted him to stick around for lunch. :rainbowlaugh:

    #24 · Chapter 3 · 45w, 4d ago · · ·
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    I was way too amused by the 'avian terror tactics' :twilightsheepish:

    #25 · Chapter 4 · 45w, 4d ago · · ·
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    >>878200

    Wait, you can do that? :rainbowhuh:

    How?

    #26 · Chapter 4 · 45w, 4d ago · · ·
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    >>883700 I'm not sure, but there's people who post youtube links for music ... Like in Sweetie Belle's Mansion? It hink somehow you can set certain words to be blue links.

    #27 · Chapter 4 · 45w, 4d ago · · ·
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    Nice. :rainbowlaugh: This looks just as promising as before!

    #28 · Chapter 4 · 45w, 4d ago · · ·
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    >>883700 Copying the url address of the link you want, you can either paste it directly into the fic, or use the little anchor button to link it to text, like this.

    Aside from that, though, loving the stories so far! You've done an excellent job in characterization and descriptions, and I wish that I could write this well.

    #29 · Chapter 3 · 45w, 1d ago · · ·
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    aw my gurd. Teh Scootaloos be escapinginging.

    Seriosuly7 though. These are really good fics. Glad I got to them.

    #30 · Chapter 4 · 45w, 11h ago · · ·
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    Lol. 'Such a whooping and hollering from the crowd, you’d have thought that Graves had just given everyone there a free pony.':rainbowlaugh: That made me imagine a gif of either Graves or Oprah giving away ponies. "And you get a pony! And you get a pony! You! At the back! You get one too!"

    Oh, a few spelling/grammer things by the way, just to help you out. :twilightsmile:

    "Where you surprise? Were you?"

    Simple mistake, easy fix.

    you’ be able

    you'd or you'll, another simple fix.

    learn how to take things easy.

    Missing a " at the end.

    usually stolid face

    Most likely should be solid, instead of stolid.

    Awesomely done though, I'll look forward to reading more from you. :rainbowkiss::rainbowkiss:

    Oh, just realized how late I am. Sorry about that. :facehoof:

    #31 · Chapter 4 · 44w, 6d ago · · ·
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    Not bad. Short but sweet.

    #32 · Chapter 1 · 44w, 1d ago · · ·
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    He cared? *Has horrible flashback moment to Care Bears*

    GAHHHH!! MY EYES! I'M BLIND! THE PAIN! OH GOSH, WHY ISN'T ANYONE TRYING TO HELP ME?! AUGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

    #33 · Chapter 2 · 44w, 1d ago · · ·
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    Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait... Wait... He... HE CAN RESIST APPLEBLOOM'S EYES?! DA BUQ?! Okay, too OP. Gary Stu, sorry... I could accept that he's all of these other things, but really? Immune to Puppy eyes? That's just too much...

    (XD Just teasing you, but still...)

    #34 · Chapter 4 · 44w, 1d ago · · ·
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    ‘Let’s do this! Hoorah!’

    Pfft... XD Do you ALWAYS have a good ending line for the last chapter? Last one it was “… There’s nothing wrong with my coat,”

    XD Nice... Maybe a bit... IDK... Seems like this could be better, as a story I mean, but... OH! It's too short. And simple. Yeah. Just from one thing to the next, and then it's done. You need some side-quests or somethin! XD

    #35 · Chapter 4 · 43w, 2d ago · · ·
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    Man, someone´s even worse at making friends/figuring people out than Twi. What a day. :derpyderp2:

    Thank the gods, Twi has such a connection with the Princess and can simply ask for a year long vacation for Graves. And then the Pinkie party. :rainbowlaugh:

    But i´m missing some aciton, some shooting, some awesome RD/AJ karate moves, some grand and amazing Twilight magic stuff and so on. More wild west action ya know?

    #36 · Chapter 1 · 42w, 3d ago · · ·
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    >>940340

    Here look at this silver tube *puts on sunglasses* Just keep looking.

    *light flashes* Now you never saw carebears. If anyone asks you you have never seen it and will never try to and those memories you have will be locked in the deepest recesses of your mind.

    All right you have a good day now.

    #37 · Chapter 4 · 42w, 3d ago · · ·
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    >>1007747 9.6 *Blinks to try to refocus* Yeah... You too... *Stands in the same spot for a good hour*

    #38 · Chapter 3 · 42w, 20h ago · · ·
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    Avian terrorist tactics?:rainbowlaugh: that's genius. I like Graves character a lot except for the part where he makes me want to :facehoof:. but again that was used for comedic purposes. Which works. Anywho, great fic, great writing. I hope to be as good as you when I write my fic. Also I hope you see the resemblance but Graves reminds me of Vash from Trigun with the coolness of Spike Spiegel.:moustache:

    #39 · Chapter 1 · 42w, 19h ago · · ·
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    I just finished the previous story and this chapter.

    I like his style, mysterious stranger "old man-cool" with a big ass sniper magic gun? awesome

    #40 · Chapter 3 · 39w, 1d ago · · ·
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    Oh Graves, you so blind. :derpytongue2:

    #41 · Chapter 2 · 35w, 5d ago · · ·
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    * Sigh* Okay, Graves, I'll talk you through it.

    Demographics.  In Equestria, the approximate female/male ratio in frontier towns is anything up to 6-to-1.  Those that are around are typically in committed relationships (the good Doctor for example) or relatives of one of the major family groups that dominate the area (like the Pies and the Apples).  So, being an unattached and out-of-area male, you are going to have a lot of the unattached ladies following you around and batting their pretty eyes at you.  I hope that you have a habit of succeeding in tough WILL rolls. :twilightsmile:

    #42 · Chapter 3 · 35w, 5d ago · · ·
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    Celestia definately planned this for her "best agent" - Put him in a town with her personal student and a bevvy of other lovely and lonely young women looking for a life-mate and wait for the magic to take its course.  I've got a mental image of Luna accusing her of being a "wannabe Yenta".

    #43 · Chapter 1 · 35w, 2d ago · · ·
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    There is a problem with your description of Graves. In the first story, you said his eyes were steel grey, now you have them as cloudy grey.  Just something minor to fix if you could.

    #44 · Chapter 2 · 35w, 2d ago · · ·
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    He didn’t get it, but something about Applejack’s smile bothered him. It was as if she was somehow disappointed, but that didn’t make sense. They’d finished picking all the apples, hadn’t they?

    Graves, you are an idiot when it comes to women...

    :facehoof:

    #45 · Chapter 3 · 35w, 2d ago · · ·
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    “So, um, I was wondering…” Fluttershy began, her usual shy uncertainty returning as she absently scuffed at the ground where she stood. “I was planning on taking Angel Bunny to visit some of the forest animals after we have afternoon tea, and… I was wondering if–”

    “Oh. Alright. Have fun on your rounds,” Fluttershy said, her smile faltering a bit as she said this. With a tip of his hat, Graves turned and quickly trotting off.

    As he left though, he mentally kicked himself for being so stupid. He’d spent too long picking apples, so he couldn’t help with the barn, and here, he’d spent too much time on the chickens so he couldn’t help with the animals. No wonder Fluttershy had the same look of disappointment that Applejack had on earlier.

    you know what is funnier than having a guy being oblivious to a girl's advances? him doing it to two girls.

    :facehoof::facehoof: :facehoof::facehoof::facehoof: :facehoof: :facehoof:

    #47 · Chapter 4 · 35w, 2d ago · · ·
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    >>1303554

    Good eye. This was actually intentional. The eyes are windows to the soul as they say, and the way they look reflects how he feels at the moment. Steel hard and sure is how he usually is, cloudy grey is when he's pensive or uncertain, and a silvery shine connotes happiness and mirth, to name a few.

    Hope this little discourse helps. :twilightsmile:

    #48 · Chapter 2 · 35w, 2d ago · · ·
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    >>282632 FANfiction it is stories that are written by fans, and this HIE is great

    #49 · Chapter 2 · 33w, 5d ago · · ·
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    I find humanized stories to be easier to picture in my head as I read them.

    I had to take a break while reading because I laughed so hard at the catapult suggestion.

    #50 · Chapter 3 · 32w, 4d ago · · ·
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    Here we have Marshal Graves. He can hit a target with pin-point accuracy from insane distances with ease. When it comes to understanding women though... He can't hit the broad side of a barn with a shotgun.

    #51 · Chapter 3 · 31w, 21h ago · · ·
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    Marshal Graves, you need to learn how to understand women:facehoof::facehoof::facehoof: , you're driving me crazy!!!! I started cursing at you to understand  at the computer screen until i realized i was reading a fanfic :facehoof:

    #52 · Chapter 4 · 28w, 6d ago · · ·
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    "It’s Pinkie Pie! She’s in trouble down at Sugar Cube Corner. Hurry!” Rainbow Dash flew right back out the door, giving Graves just enough time to turn back to Twilight with an apologetic smile."

    They've got him figured out, I love it

    #53 · Chapter 1 · 28w, 6d ago · · ·
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    >>swiftstriker21

    I ADORE YOUR CHARACTER PICTURE! :pinkiehappy::derpytongue2::yay::twilightsmile::rainbowkiss:

    >>Story

    I LOVE THIS STOREH!!!! :rainbowkiss::rainbowkiss::rainbowkiss::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy::moustache::moustache:

    #54 · Chapter 4 · 28w, 6d ago · · ·
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    YOU. STILL. HAVE . ALL. OF. MAH. YUSS.

    #55 · Chapter 3 · 28w, 5d ago · · ·
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    ... He's a little daft, ain't he :ajbemused::twilightsheepish:

    #56 · Chapter 3 · 26w, 5d ago · · ·
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    >>1406754

    Life for you.

    #57 · Chapter 3 · 23w, 6d ago · 2 · ·
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    I lost it at Angry Debt collector... Bravo.

    #58 · Chapter 2 · 11w, 5d ago · · ·
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    >>1305778 technically it can't be a HiE because the characters are all human

    >>1364306 I thought Graves was going to do a double take after he heard that suggestion.

    #59 · Chapter 3 · 11w, 5d ago · 1 · ·
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    He is a genius in a lot of aspects, but a total idiot when it comes to girls:derpytongue2::twilightsheepish::moustache::facehoof:

    #60 · Chapter 4 · 11w, 3d ago · · ·
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    >>2209320 however, it is in the MLP:FiM universe?

    #61 · Chapter 4 · 9w, 4d ago · · ·
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    You need an editor to run through your stories. There are minor grammtical errors through both the first and second that I have read so far.

    If you would like, I would be happy to run through them again and point out errors.

    I figure I might as well since I plan on reading every one of the stories in the series. :ajsmug:

    #62 · Chapter 4 · 9w, 4d ago · · ·
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    You need an editor to run through your stories. There are minor grammtical errors through both the first and second that I have read so far.

    If you would like, I would be happy to run through them again and point out errors.

    I figure I might as well since I plan on reading every one of the stories in the series. :ajsmug:

    #63 · Chapter 3 · 9w, 1d ago · · ·
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    >>2209362 Maybe He Just Looks At Things From A Different View......I Mean He Did Say In The First Fic That He Wanted To Just Do His Job Quickly.......Maybe He's A Bit Of A Workaholic.:rainbowhuh:

    #64 · Chapter 2 · 7w, 3d ago · · ·
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    >>1290607 He's obviously a Gunslinger, which means his Wisdom must be pretty high. That should make up for his poor Will save. Besides, we're easily looking at at least a Level 12 character here - he'll be fine.

    #65 · Chapter 2 · 5w, 4d ago · · ·
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    >>2209320 human in equestria, HiE, or it is a HiE, humans in equestria.

    #66 · Chapter 4 · 4w, 4d ago · · ·
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    Man, I can relate to Graves.

    Do your job, move on. 'Tis life.

    #67 · Chapter 2 · 4w, 1h ago · · ·
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    >>dragenfire68 It's a antro story  so all the pony's are human.

    #68 · Chapter 2 · 2w, 1d ago · · ·
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    wheres big:eeyup: mac

    #69 · Chapter 2 · 6d, 10h ago · · ·
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    So I was correct on my assumption that AB's lisp came from a missing/broken tooth. Yay me :D

    #70 · Chapter 4 · 10h, 54m ago · · ·
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    >>2490093

    *human-ish

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