There is a pro and a con.

It's TwilightxSpitfire

it's by Dracoliat

Gonna read it later...

Well... that was only Legendary. Good job :)

Tracking for a read later.

A good, non-disturbing story from Dracoliat? I can't bucking believe it.

Man it was okay but Spitfire crying? That's just off. I don't see her as much of a crybaby

>>288235288235 What?

>>288235288235

Because in the show she had 2 lines. In which she had to be the strong one.

>>288149288149

Lol, I know, it's weird isn't it?

>>288235288235 The only part where anybody cries is at the end, and even then it's not Spitfire, It's Twilight. (Unless I missed a section, I've been known to skip entire chunks by accident.)

>>288399288399

You forget at the beginning, the rookie cries, but ya Spitfire never that I remember.

I'm working on fanfic. but it needs improvement. so if you could give advice on it any would help. it's called the great pony war: the fight for freedom.

Great story. Also one thing amazes me. Most ponies can't spell per se correctly, always spelling it per say, not per se as it should be, it coming from Latin. You spelt it per se, ergo correctly, however you made mistakes like spelling unphazed, not unfazed; what kind of abomination is this? That you know the complex language but can't grasp the simple language? and yes, sorry I do notice every small detail, sometimes too well. I apologize for that

>>288933288933

Thanks for your input. And you're quite right, I did do that wrong, I am sorry for that. On a related note, people need to learn that not everything is spelled how it sounds!

>>288972288972 The basic spelling errors are unacceptable per se; normally I'd harp on about the spelling mistakes but I was impressed with everything else so I decided to overlook them. Hey, you know how to spell 'per se' and you know the right context to use 'per se' in, that surely gained my respect: just like the semicolons, per se is a thing that is to be used wisely but is really good when used correctly; your ability to use a tricky word like that correctly meant that you are more than excused for basic mistakes I was genuinely impressed about your knowledge of complex prose and how to write.

With such sexy language being used by you, why should I whip you for basic errors? unless the language is a voyeuristic sadist or enjoys BDSM of course. (yes, I apologize but I can't resist basic sexual jokes)

guys, it was the "i think I'm falling in love with Twilight" moment on a cloud.  she let ONE tear off.

i got a little confuzzled in one bit there for a while...it was a bit...Obtuse, like that part got edited a bit.  i got the rest of it quickly enough

>>289029289029

Thank you for your kind complements! I know I should have spent more time editing. However, in my defense, I wrote and edited this entire thing in 3 days.

Fuck Her Gently - Tenacious D

Mistakes everywhere.

Great story though. The ending was a lil sudden.

But it still PWEASED MEH!

So yeah I thought it was a good story lol.

"The pain interrupted her sentence as it's cold hand hand clenched around her throat again before letting go."

humans, i knew this story was to good to be true.

This was rather good, but felt really rushed, thous could have been a fantastic multiple chapter story if you would  slowed down a bit..

The ending I loved. it was relay sweet and happy.

>>290772290772

Ya, I had to get it done in a few days... so I wrote it in 2, edited in 1

at least it's not a troll fic.

Quite a few formatting and punctuation errors, as well as homonym confusion such as what Leader_Cherif mentioned, such as 'there, their, they're' confusion at one or two points.

Tellyness and awkward execution in a few places, but otherwise it was alright.

I have a good idea...WRITE MORE OF THIS I WILL WORSHIP YOU AS MY KING FOR ALL ETERNITY!

You know this is good when i read this during school and start D'AAWWWing.

Disapointment. I was looking forward to another disturbing gory rape fic.

Why the hell did nobody tell me that I'm not the only one anymore who wrote a TwiFire story?

This was a quite adorable fic. A few strange wordings here and telly there, but nothing nobody else hasn't mentioned. I would have loved it if this story had been longer and more fleshed out, but it's enjoyable as it is.

>>468404468404

Thank you, I actually really liked writing this story, but I'll tell the truth it was a whimsy. Somepony told me to write it in IRC, so I did.

>>468526468526

Yeah, I read the notes at the end. I'll have to beat up Vurtax now for not telling me about it.

Good story. Just a few things though.

The microscopic blood vessels in Spitfire's cheeks burst, creating a strong blush.

Blushing does not work that way. Check here to see.

Books are not embroidered, cloth is. I think you meant to say embossed perhaps. Other than that and quite a few spelling and grammar errors, a decent story of a ship not often seen.

A shipping fic with the only intentional kiss was on the cheek. i am :)

Anyhow nice read

write an epilogue!!! i wanna see rainbow dash's reaction!!!! it would be funny as all hell!

i wish there could be more stories like this for spitfire and twi but i cant seem to find them

The amounts of d'awwwwww in this are critical. I loved the simple yet effective story, your charming writing style and your ability to create lots of cuteness. Well done!

I need more Spitfire stories! But this was a fantastic read and I loved every second of it, the second time I'm reading it actually... There are average problems as in; grammar, a few letters missing from words and just the spacing. Nothing that disturbs the flow of the story.