- Member Since 20th Dec, 2012
- offline last seen January 13th
Blood Brandy
I write a variety of story types and often have more ideas than I know what to do with. If you like what you see, don't be afraid to drop a review.
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Some issues here and there with the writing as well as punctuation, but it's fine other than that.
A few miss spells but nothing major. So this is the story we're doing, I honestly almost forgot about it. I'll have change my plans but I got the bare bones of my chapter already planned out. Just got to see what kind of mood and flow the guys ahead of me sets up.
I wish you guys all the luck in the world with this collab!
This was pretty good, even with the insane amount of political puns. I like the cheesy porn premise of 'Spike nailing all the female jurors for a series of minor crimes that he didn't actually commit.' The plot is right up there with the pizza delivery guy, the plumber laying down some pipe and the grad-student that needs a deadline "extension." I mean that as a compliment.
My body is ready
IT HAS BEGUN!
While I am sad that I won't be getting in on this collab thanks to real life issues and other things, this looks really good so far. Hopefully, one of the ponies I see Spike "convincing" Trixie to get a not guilty. Call me insane, but I think Spike on Trixie action sounds awesome. Here's to hoping to see that! Good luck to those writers out there!
Well that was as much fun to read as it was to write.
Hope you all enjoyed yourselves. Don't think I'll be writing anything else anytime soon. This stuff is hard work.
3231624 Yeah, went a little overboard on the puns, sorry.
But in my defense, didn't really have much else to go on with this mare. So yeah... cheesy porno puns it is.
Nice, but the whole "double dragon" just seems odd, and a little creepy.
It's an interensting concept, but it just doesn't make sense. First of all, how are stupid reasons like the ones mentioned able to send Spike to court? Secondly, if the entire jury believes Spike is innocent, what's the point of bribing them with sex?
3228812
Lol, no they're not.
3231645
*Begun
3231702
Porn has no logic. The same goes for MLP porn.
Great story so far.
A couple of minor typos:
The second and third bits of the sentence ("but a more wiry strength", "maybe a bit bigger") lack verbs.
"His spines".
3231670 Your about as sane as the rest of us, because it is a good idea.
"trial", not "trail".
3231702
As lord of Nothing said, porn has no logic, but to add on, there are certain other jurors who don't know Spike as well and are not as predisposed to believe him innocent, and a not-guilty verdict is what would be desired, as a hung jury would result in a mistrial and leave things open for the charges to be refiled against Spike
3231756 3231748
Thank you
Whoa there Mayor! I can understand a needy mare wanting some rough action, but having a whole desk slam into you is going a bit far!
Well. This is possibly the most ridiculous thing I've read in a while.
...
So when's the next chapter?
3231814
DID YOU JUST
<le tumblr voice>
3231862
Perhaps
<steeples hands>
Um.. I am just going to say it. The set up makes absolutely no sense whatsoever. So he is going to tamper with the jury, a more serious offense, than what he is facing. Something that would get overturned anyway.
You know what, I am over thinking a fic which is just a paperthin porno plot anyway.
Please continue to the good bits.
3231879
You could see it as a nothing to lose scenario, as Blueblood is trying to push for a ridiculous sentence anyway.
You could see it as a hard to prove case for Jury Tampering, as there is no monetary bribe to find, no intimidation or introduction of prohibited information to be accused of.
Or you could just say "Porn", shrug and read on
3231879 I'm sure it would have been more structured and sensible if FlimFlamBros. himself had been able to write it.
I can't believe it. It's actually here.
Blueblood you little prick!
Well. That was. Different. Not that that's bad. I rather enjoyed it to be honest. This may spawn many more little one shots with random Mares for Spike to... immerse in very friendly activities with but I see that as a good thing. I like creativity and it's certainly is creative.
I would raise a glass to this story if I could, but I'm from Australia... so I raise a can of Emu Export instead.
I can't believe it. You guys actually made it.
You guys are the greatest!
I can't believe it. What started as a joke I told, became a story.
Take all of my yes.
This brings happy tears to my face.
This is greatness.
EDIT: OH MA GAWD! THIS IS FEATURED!!
oh this is going to be so good!
That was a damn good read!
Can't wait for the next!
a most excellent chapter
3231879 My good man, there's something that you shouldn't really be expecting in a porno, and that is logic with a dash of common sense.
Also, the prosecution would wish to argue that unless Spike or the jurors that Spike has sex with talk about the jury tampering in question, I highly doubt anyone would find out because there'd be no solid evidence of his jury tampering. Furthermore, I question if Blueblood is smart enough to actually interrogate the jurors about having any contact with Spike. However, we'll see as the story moves along.
That is all for my opening statement.
An interesting and entertaining concept, I always love a good story about Spike getting some; but you guys are in dire need of some competent editing. There's no excuse for a collaboration of nearly a dozen people to have as many grammar and spelling errors as I found. You should be passing your chapters back and forth to each other and combing over them thoroughly, instead of commenting on the story after the fact that you have some errors. Otherwise the messy grammar and spelling just ruins it for me.
--CG
S-so uh, should I keep mine punny and funny? ('#_#)
Wow, I go to bed and my alert box explodes...
3232317
Ho....Leee...CRAP!
3232532 3232537
I did my best editing the first chapter and we had three people go over the prologue. It's a bit of a rocky start, but I think it's going great for me only having the reigns for a week
3232074
It's up to you, dude, but I think with you having Redheart, you may be obligated to make a joke about Spike taking her temperature, not sure though
3232261 well his nick name is Blueballs
3231702 do you what to read clop or a story?
3232313 Moral of the story. Wishes do come true.
3232605 bit of an anachronic response order.
And I was gonna take a different approach.
Plus featured box is to be expected Of this. It's a collab clop.
Also, how about some story cover art?
3232674
...First, how is it out of temporal order?
Second, I was joking, it's your chapter, do as you will within the parameters of the collaboration.
Third, I really wouldn't know where to start on a cover pic. If someone has a suggestion, I'm open to them.
3232634 indeed they do.
I find this disturciting. Disturbing and Exciting at the same time. Bloody hell, I wanna read more.
ya'll know that i like this, but i just had a thought. the lady who does the voice of Spike, also does the voice of the Mayor. kinda funny and ironic if ya ask me