Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash have been friends for a long time. Fluttershy has been in love with Rainbow Dash for a long time. And Rainbow Dash? She hasn't answered the question yet.
But when the opportunity of a lifetime finally arrives, Rainbow may not be able to put off her answer any longer.
People's Choice winner of the Flutterdash Contest 1: "Conflict".
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This was a pretty good read. It was fairly decent in length for such a story but definitely worth the time reading it in one sitting. Well done.
Decent story.
I thought it ended before we got to the juicy parts but its still good as it is.
3265768i hate it when that happens
it's kinda annoying
3259581 war bings humanity together to stand as a group and work together against the enemy which is communicating to defeat the other side
Great. Now it's 11:49 and I have school in the morning. I would do it all over again just to read this wonderfully written story. It flowed like my bowels and hit me firmly between my lungs and colon. Just the way I like it.
Ps. Dem abs
I liked it! I think my favorite decision you made here was to have Fluttershy's love for Dash as something already confessed in the past. I think that avoids the pitfall some other stories fall into, the whole "suddenly I love you" thing, and it's a nice change of pace. It sets up conflict and tension in a more organic and believable way. As always, I enjoyed your characterizations and dialogue, as everyone felt like and sounded like themselves.
I know you mentioned in your blog post that you believe pacing is an issue here, and I think you're right. Things felt a little too fast, overall. I think a number of scenes could have been even better if they'd been given some additional length to build up tension, and I think the Twilight in Canterlot subplot could have benefited from some fleshing out. Still, though, none of that means I didn't like the story or think it was a good read, 'cause I did and I do.
I this is good but something about this story seems boring im not sure if I like it or not
3299952
I guess it's partially a matter of relatives: if the central chapters were fleshed out more then the slow bits at the start and end would be a smaller proportion of the story.
Funny you think it's too fast … These scenes are much longer than I usually write (I was kinda proud of my progress there) and in the contest results thread Titanium Dragon told me that the story wastes too much time before getting interesting, and too much time after releasing the tension – in short, to them it felt too slow.
The Twilight in Canterlot subplot was definitely too shallow, but I wasn't sure whether to add more material to that (considering that it's a diversion from the main plot) or cut it out as a bad job (which would cost me a lot of the supporting material). The solution obviously would be to expand on the main plot via the subplot, but it's difficult enough to plot one thing at a time … which is why I'm still a rookie.
I'm glad you liked that Fluttershy had already confessed in the past. That's the most original idea in the fic, after all. I wanted 'Shy and Dash to not be in a relationship yet, but I also wanted to exploit their shared history, which is a great advantage of FlutterDash as a ship. This seemed like an interesting and conflict-driving way to do that.
3259563 the sound when you have a really bad cold and sore throat and it hurts to talk it's really annoying
is that a reference to the fanfic "The Walls Came Tumbling Down"? i love that fanfic one of the best i ever read love it sooo much MMMM
3335288
Sorry! It's just an idiom, not a reference to anything in particular. But thanks for mentioning "The Walls Came Tumbling Down" – now that's a new one for my Read Later list.
3336206 change it from read later list to effing read right now!! list
3310674
Well, as always, take what I say with a grain of salt. I could well be wrong about the pacing.
It would've been a shame to lose the Twilight subplot entirely, I think. I did like its presence in the story, and it served a number of useful functions in terms of forwarding the main plot.
One word to describe this: Feels
This was so heart-warming... <3
Loved the fic <3
Why are all the best FlutterDash fics sad?????
This is like, the ONLY time i have ever seen dash reject an invitation to the wonderbolts.
~Wywint
*sad smile*
Love it to death
~Wywint
Spitfire was more no-nonsense than ive seen her in the past...
~Wywint
Sargent, the feels cannon scored a direct hit!
~Wywint
3335288 oh yeah!
loved that one so much!
CLOUD FACTORY IN THIS SIMPLE FACILTY AT THE RAINBOW FACTORY WHERE YOUR FEARS AND HORRORS COME TRUE
pretty sweet. though the payoff was kind of... not as much as I hoped.
>>Emerald Flight Meh. I thought it was very descriptive. just an opinion tho/