• Published 11th Sep 2013
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The Wheel and the Butterfly A Dan X Pinkie Pie Saga - Justice3442



Pinkie Pie finds herself adjusting to a new, hostile world, with a new hostile friend. Can they make it through this new misadventure together, or is it the universe that needs to watch out for them?

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Part 4.5 Twilight Sparkle Vs. Discord: Chapter 26

The Wheel and the Butterfly



A Dan X Pinkie Pie saga



Part 4.5 Twilight Sparkle Vs. Discord



Chapter 26

-ooooooo-

Discord grinned to himself behind his upside-down tea cup as the door to his room slammed open revealing a furious-looking purple Alicorn.

“DISCORD!” Twilight yelled in an accusatory tone. She pointed a forehoof at the Draconequus. “I know it was you.”

“Oh come now, Twilight Sparkle. Aren’t you the one always looking for all the facts before jumping to any”—Discord turned his head a complete 180, opened his mouth wide, and emptied the contents of his cup into his mouth—“wild conclusions?” Discord’s grin widened as he threw the teacup away. Its existence terminated in a fiery explosion as it hit the wall. “Come, come now. Have a seat and let’s talk about this…”

Twilight shot him a glare. “I’d imagine I would have trouble with that.”

Discord looked over the room. Bright, colorful lamps floated at random intervals around the room, and paintings that seemed little more than bright blotches of color adorned the walls. Most of the furniture was currently floating upside-down a few feet away from the ceiling. Including the chair Discord was sitting on. A rocking chair orbited the center spinning randomly in all directions at a frantic speed.

Discord grabbed his head and pulled it back into place with a snap, using his neck to roll it slightly back and forth. Discord sighed. “Very well. Have it your way.” He snapped his eagle claw, and all furniture and decor vanished, leaving a nearly barren room with the exception of a few plain looking lamps on the walls, the purple alicorn, and Discord himself.

“There! Nice, plain, boring.” Discord said with a sneer. “Just the way you ponies like it.” Discord lowered himself to a horizontal position, lounging on thin air.

Twilight glowered at him, “Fine! I don’t need to sit. But tell me, why did you send Pinkie away and how do we get her back?!” Twilight demanded.

Discord’s eyes rolled in a very literal sense as his mouth pulled into a sneer once more. “Oh, there you go again! You get one lead, and now you’re barking up my tree,”—Discord snapped his claw again and a tree sprouted from the ground, quickly growing to contain him in his lounging position—“and it’s the wrong one.”

“Don’t play games with me Discord! I know it was you who fired that red bolt into the past!” Twilight asserted.

Discord motioned his claw out to Twilight. “Now THAT is a cold hard fact. Still! I’m surprised you didn’t come see me sooner.” Discord snaked out of the tree and slithered across the ground towards Twilight. He sat up as he approached, bringing his head up to Twilight’s face level. He stroked a lion paw across her cheek. “Too scared to talk to Uncle Discord?” Discord pouted. “I’m hurt.”

Twilight glared at him. “Why would I come to see you before?”

Discord quickly sat upright and looked down at Twilight in surprise, “Don’t tell me you couldn’t figure out the clue I left on the computer. It was hardly subtle.”

“Clue? What clue? There wasn’t…”

>-oooooooo-<

Dan picked up the mirror and faced it towards the screen, “See, ‘Too purple’? The people got it covered.”

Twilight ignored the comment, simply happy for the progress. “Great, now let’s try to find some clues!”

Pinkie stroked her chin, thinking about the picture and password, “Clues, eh…well…”

Dan placed a hand on his roommate's face and pushed her out of the way. “Clues, shmues. Let’s fire up the internet on this baby.” Dan said with a grin, putting down the mirror and rubbing his palms together.

<-oooooooo->

Twilight glanced to the side with a sneer and uttered an angry. “Dan!”

Discord broke into an uproarious fit of laughter.

Hehehehehe…” Discord wiped away a tear. “Oh this is priceless! The delicious chaos that man leaves in his wake has been the most fun I’ve had in ages!”

“Wait! So you did plan this!” Twilight accused.

Discord’s grin turned devilish.“Not exactly… I had no idea The Order Keepers would strike, and it took me a while to figure out I had a part to play in their little exile of our mutual pink pony friend. Or already played, such as it were…”

Twilight’s jaw dropped. “You know what The Order Keepers are?!”

Discord sighed. “Twilight, this is probably going to be a long, tedious conversation. Why don’t you go get us a couple of comfortable chairs?” Discord motioned to the tree with his lion paw. “The tree is far less comfortable than it looks.”

“Why don’t you just magic some seats?” Twilight shot back.

“Oh, I don’t know Princess, why don’t you just order some servants to bring some?” Discord retorted with a sly grin.

Twilight made a frustrated growl. “You’ll answer my questions, then?”

“Of course!” Discord replied.

Honestly?”

“Yes, yes.” Discord said, waving his claw at Twilight dismissively.

“And no funny business?”

Discord chuckled. “Don’t ask for promises you know I can’t keep.”

Twilight glared at the Draconequus and stormed out of the room.

Discord steepled his talon and paw together, lightly tapping his digits against each other.

-ooo-

Soon, Twilight returned to the barren room, the tree seemingly having been dismissed. Fluttershy and Flash Sentry followed. A red loveseat, easy-chair, and couch followed the pony procession, held aloft by a purple glow.

Discord smirked. “I see you brought your trump card. But why your beau? Afraid you’ll need the moral support?” Discord asked, cocking his head to the side.

Flash shot Discord and angry look and leveled a hoof at him. “I’m her guard. It’s my duty to protect her.”

OoOoOoOoOo~! I’m so scared!” Discord exclaimed as he brought his claw and paw up to his smiling face. “What are you going to do if things get to hot? Bring your princess a refreshing beverage?”

“Discord!” Fluttershy rang out. “That’s enough! Behave yourself.”

Discord sighed. “Fine, fine.”

Twilight arranged the furniture in a neat circle around the room. She and Flash sat on the loveseat; Fluttershy climbed onto the easy-chair. The ponies sat down on their haunches. Discord lounged horizontally on the couch.

“So,” Twilight began, “what did that red blast do exactly?”

Discord smiled again and held a pointed eagle claw up, waving it slightly at Twilight, “An excellent question, my dear. The red blast served to misdirect Pinkie’s intended destination. Additionally, it allowed me to provide her with supplies she would need to survive the unforgiving world she ended up on.”

“Why that world?” Twilight added.

“Well, apparently I had already chosen it, who am I to toy with causality’s merry game?” Discord asked rhetorically with a grin.

“A self-proclaimed master of chaos,” Twilight reminded.

Discord raised his forelimbs up in a shrug, “Fair enough. But by the time I pieced together what had happened, I had no desire to even attempt to change the past. Dan plus Pinkie Pie meant an endless stream of flowing chaos in that world, and what’s more, she seems happy to stay by the side of that little ball of terror. A much better realm than those dull old Order Keepers would have sent her to.”

“Am I to understand you did Pinkie a favor?” Twilight inquired.

Discord rolled his eagle talon claw side up. “But of course!”

“Do you know where she would have been sent?”

Discord nodded.

There was a pause.

“…Care to share this information with us?!” Twilight asked in a frustrated tone of voice.

“Oh, I can do better than that.” Discord snapped his talon and the bare walls and floor gave way to a serene-looking jungle. Fruits and berries adorned all the plants, and a clear stream flowed through the trees and between the furniture arranged on the ground.

“Pretty…” Fluttershy murmured.

“Seriously? Dan’s world is better than this?” Twilight asked motioning to their surroundings.

Discord threw his head back and laughed. “Hahahaha…Twilight, Twilight, Twilight. Always looking at what’s in front of her. Never considering the big picture! It’s not what you see.” Discord waved a hand in front of his eyes; they disappeared from his face. “It’s what you don’t!”

The trio of ponies looked around their surroundings.

“What? It’s peaceful…” Twilight offered.

“There’s nopony else here.” Flash stated.

Ahhhh…So your beau does have some use.” Discord said, lowering his paw to the ground as his eyes rolled back up it and into their perch on his face. “Yes. It’s a garden of endless fruits, clean water, always perfect weather, and not another soul in the entire dimension. Accommodating only the most basic needs of the occupant. No technology, no tools, and no mirrors or other troublesome devices that might allow someone to contact the occupant. Just the sort of dull place The Order Keepers think would be perfect for a troublemaker while conforming with a type of mercy that they think makes their actions justifiable.” Discord suddenly disappeared from his seat, and reappeared, small, long and limbless, snaking his way through the trees and bushes of the land. “A lifetime spent in solitary confinement in a Garden of Eden, as the humans might say… A paradise that would quickly turn into our young friend’s Hell.” Discord suddenly reappeared upright on the couch, and snapped his fingers turning the jungle into a gloomy, barren place of rocks, holes, and caves. The holes glowed orange as if something fiery laid below them

Discord continued. “How long would it be until our pink pony friend snapped without anypony or anyone to talk to? Years? Months? Maybe only weeks. Her only friends would be the rocks and branches she collected. How long do you suppose it would take her to give into madness?” Discord’s smile faded into grimness across his face. “How long do you suppose it would take her to give up on life?” A noose appeared around Discord’s neck and tightened. Discord’s eyes bulged as he stuck out his tongue.

A visible chill ran across the trio of ponies.

“Okay… I’ll concede that this is much better for Pinkie… and us even.” Twilight said. “Still, it seems rather… deterministic of you.”

Discord smiled and shrugged as his prop disappeared. “As I said, the outcome made me happy. It’s even made Pinkie happy. I can think of no greater alternative than to introduce her to a kindred spirit.”

“Kindred?!” Twilight exclaimed. “They're practically complete opposites!”

Discord waved a talon back in forth as if chastising Twilight. “Oh, there’s that short-sightedness of yours again. I’ll grant that their temperaments are night and day, but they both approach situations with a creativeness and impulsiveness that makes me green with envy!” Discord’s multicolored body changed to green to emphasize the point. “Like it or not, Princess, they seem to really enjoy each other’s company. Two little perfect partners in chaos riding a runaway train neither cares to stop.” Discord mused as his color returned.

Twilight sighed.

They do seem to get along, for the most part. And Pinkie seems really happy to be with Dan even when things get a little too chaotic even for her. Maybe they do understand each other on a level none of us can really comprehend…

“Alright, then. Tell me what you know about The Order Keepers.”

Discord frowned slightly. “I’m sorry, Princess. I said I’d answer your questions, not give into your demands.” Discord answered with a dismissive wave of his talon.

Uhg! Fine. What do you know about The Order Keepers?” Twilight rephrased.

“Quite a bit, I suppose. They’re ancient. Much older than Equestria, or even me.” Discord chuckled. “Which is saying quite a bit. They weren’t always the dull, dark blue clouds of gloom you encountered. I was told they once were a race of humanoids, or some such. Tell me, Twilight Sparkle, how much do you know about magic?”

Twilight’s eyes narrowed. “Is that supposed to be a joke?”

Discord chuckled to himself, “No, no joke. But how much time have you spent thinking about where magic comes from?”

“I…” Twilight began to sweat as if she was taking a test she hadn’t studied for, “…I know unicorns are born with the potential to use magic…”

“Yes, but that ability doesn’t just pop out of thin air,” Discord replied.

Twilight sighed. “Okay, what do you know about magic?”

“Well, I know this entire world is almost composed of the stuff. As am I…as are Princess Luna and Celestia…” –Discord grinned with eyes that narrowed to slits— “… as are you, Ms. Element of Magic.”

Twilight looked visibly shaken.

Flash reached over and put a supportive hoof on Twilight’s, while shooting a glare at Discord.

Discord…” Fluttershy uttered in a warning tone.

Discord raised his hands apologetically. “Sorry. It was not my intention to unnerve everypony.” Discord’s head inflated as if it were being filled with air. “I’ll get to the point.” He produced a pin and popped his own head.

The room dimmed and in the center a collection of stars and galaxies appeared; as flowing bright blue lines ran through the microcosm of a cosmos, Discord’s disembodied head floated out of the darkness and continued his explanation, “There are paths of magic that travel through all of known existence. Some call them ley lines, dragon lines, etcetera.” Discord said, pointing out the blue lines with his long, thin tongue. “The very planet itself exists in the path of one such line.” Discord’s tongue encircled an area. Suddenly the collection of bright points expanded in size, moving past the occupants of the room as they grew. A small planet with a tiny moon and sun orbiting it floated in the center of Discord’s tongue, a blue, wavy line traveling over and encompassing the heavenly bodies. “And those that can tap into this power become literal demi-gods of power. Exciting, no?” Discord asked, raising his eyebrows, as his body reached out for his head and screwed it back into place.

Twilight pondered this.

Mental note: See if Discord could help me study this.

…Bring Fluttershy…

“Okay, so Equestria is magic. What does this have to do with The Order Keepers?”

“Excuse me, but can we come up with a shorter name, or an acronym, or something here?” Flash interrupted. “This sinister uttering of the words ‘The Order Keepers’ is starting to get on my nerves.”

“Uhhh…The Keepers?” Twilight suggested.

“TOK?” Fluttershy suggested.

Discord stroked his beard. “I like it. Alright, TOK it is.”

“Alright, so the TOK…” Twilight began.

“No, it’s not THE TOK.” Discord insisted as he waved his lions paw about. “That would be ‘the The Order Keepers.’” Discord said in a mocking tone with air quotes. “That would be silly. It’s just TOK.”

Fine,” Twilight said in a slightly exasperated tone. “so TOK, what does magic have to do with them?”

“They’re the current occupants of the intersection of all ley lines. The Nexus. A source of unimaginable power. As such, they’ve tasked themselves with the upkeep of all known worlds, at least, so long as that upkeep conforms to their wishes.” Discord explained.

“The Nexus?” Twilight asked.

Discord snapped his claw again and the jungle gave way to a barren, flat, dark, blue, foggy landscape. “This is what it looks like now. How it looked before TOK took over I couldn’t say. I know they’re the ones who turned it into the dark, boring expanse of clouds and nothing you see, forcing their very will upon their surroundings. Uneventful and unchanging. It suits them quite well.”

“How do you know so much about them?” Twilight asked in a suspicious tone.

Discord smiled. “Another excellent question. They’ve had a hand, or… ”—Discord waved his eagle claw around like limp spaghetti— “… wavy …blue, black …cloud …thing in many of Equestria’s important events. The Princesses of the Sun and the Moon, the Elements and Tree of Harmony…”

“What?! But Starswirl the Bearded… ” Twilight began.

Discord waved his claw dismissively. “Yes, yes, but they’re likely the ones who helped him tap into the great magic well that the planet sits in. A pair of princesses that balance each other and a collection of stones that help restore order when needed, a magic tree the maintains order; their unexciting thought process is written all over such things.”

“But…you’ve encountered them before? I mean…you’d have to if you know all this!” Twilight asserted.

“We disagree on… almost everything, frankly, and planets that sit on or near ley lines tend to get a bit more attention from TOK, as they’re the easiest to keep tabs on from the Nexus and tend to give rise to the largest threats.” Discord put on a bored expression. “They tried a number of tactics to get me to comply with their vision. First talking…then attack.” Discord grinned evilly. “Trouble was, this was my realm at the time. As powerful as they and their minions were, the magic of this world can be used against them. Hence why they ultimately opted for a subtler approach to make sure I was, shall we say…indisposed.

“That’s also why they struck suddenly and unannounced this time around,” Discord continued. “They wanted to relocate Pinkie and head back to The Nexus as soon as possible. It’s safer for them there. They’re practically immortal and unkillable within the energies of The Nexus…not to mention nearly unreachable.” Discord added, shrinking his arms to tiny, T-rex like limbs against his body.

“Okay, but why Pinkie?” Twilight asked.

“Come now, it should be apparent that Pinkie has any number of abilities that don’t seem bound by the laws of nature or magic. TOK must have determined she was a threat, or at least a potential one.”

“A threat?” Fluttershy asked, surprised. “Pinkie Pie would never hurt anyone.”

Prior to meeting Dan, you mean,” Twilight said as she glanced at the yellow pegasus.

“Well…yeah…that’s probably true…” Fluttershy admitted weakly. “Still, she hadn’t even met Dan yet.” Fluttershy thought back to the day she met Dan. “... And to be fair,” Fluttershy added, “it’s probably usually Dan she attacks.”

“Well, you got me there.” Twilight admitted. “He does tend to have that effect…”

Discord’s limbs returned to their usual size and he raised his paw to his mouth, clearing his throat to regain everypony’s attention. “I didn’t necessarily mean a threat to them, per se.” Discord qualified. “Pinkie disrupts or warps the very fabric of reality.”

“And you don’t?” Twilight asked raising an eyebrow.

“Sadly, my magic, as formidable as it is, is still constrained by certain laws and limitations. Pinkie, on the other paw,”—Discord motioned with his lion paw—“may only be limited by what she wants to do. Not the sort of entity TOK would suffer to let disrupt the universe.”

Twilight crinkled her brow. “So…they were trying to relocate Pinkie to help save the universe?”

Discord paused and went wide eyed, suddenly breaking into fits of laughter.

“What’s so funny?” Twilight demanded.

HAHAHAHAhaHaha…Sorry, I just don’t think I’ll ever get used to how naive you ponies are. Someone sticks ‘Order’ in their name and suddenly they’re a paragon of goodness.”

“So… what then?” Twilight asked.

“Hmmmm…perhaps it would be better to show you.” Discord waved his lion paw about in the same manner one might to waft smoke or a smell away from themselves. As he did, the blue black fog dissipated revealing an indigo sky of stars.

“Now Twilight Sparkle, you always have that head of yours lost in books. Perhaps you can enlighten us all as to what would cause the cosmos to turn blue.”

Ha, too easy.” Twilight responded. “A blueshift.”

“…What’s a blueshift?” Flash asked.

Twilight smiled. “Oh! Well you know how the universe is constantly expanding?”

Uh… sure?”

“That’s a redshift, it’s the state our universe is currently in. A blueshift is, of course, when the universe stops expanding, and in fact, starts to contract in on itself, eventually massing into a giant singularity.”

“Right, forget I asked.”

Twilight blushed slightly with a sheepish grin at Flash and turned back to Discord. “Wait? So they’re waiting for the universe…”

All universes.” Discord corrected.

“ALL universes to blueshift?!”

“Not quite, they want to universes to come to an end.” Discord corrected.

“That would take…eons! Trillions and Trillions of years! If not longer…and…heck… There’s not even a guarantee a universe would blueshift…it could succumb to heat death, or tear apart in expansion, or…”

Discord held up his talon, signifying for Twilight to stop. “It’s not important how the universes end. Simply that they end.”

“But, that would still take an unimaginable amount of time!”

Discord steepled his fingers. “Ah, my young, young princess. You have much to learn about being immortal. TOK have all the time they need. They’re playing the most boring of boring games,” Discord said with a scowl, “a waiting game. Once a universe’s journey is done, they’re free to rebuild as they see fit, or even just make sure the universe stays dead. As beings which have had potentially trillions of years to keep themselves busy, I’m sure they have imagined or even calculated to the nanosecond the time when all universes shall end.”

“So…Pinkie was going to be exiled because she was potentially going to stave off a great crunch…or heat death…or—?”

“Yes, yes, we’re all very impressed with your astronomy knowledge Twilight,” Discord said, silencing the purple alicorn. “And it’s true to some extent. Pinkie is capable of creating energy out of seemingly nothing. Though, this usually just manifests as harmless physics law breaking here or there. Who knows, they may have simply exiled her because she threw their precious calculation off by a few milliseconds,” Discord said mockingly.

Twilight blinked a few times. “Do you really think they’re that heartless?”

Discord chuckled. “When counting down the eons of time is the only thing you care about, I’m sure disrupting that unimaginably monotonous activity would be considered rather unforgivable.”

“Well… why haven’t they simply tried to send Pinkie away, again?”

Discord shrugged. “I can’t do much more than speculate here…but Dan’s world is quite far from any ley lines. It’s also naturally prone to chaos and events that don’t seem to conform to any governed laws. Less the type of world TOK keep tabs on and more the type they hope ends prematurely when say… an occupant attempts to kill a family of squirrels using a method that would destroy the entire planet’s population.”

“Oh my! Those poor squirrels,” Fluttershy commented.

“Seriously? It’s the squirrels you’re concerned about in that situation?” Twilight asked, turning to Fluttershy.

“Well…I guess other animals would die as well…” Fluttershy added.

Twilight shook her head as if to clear it. “Well, do you know how to get Pinkie back?” she asked Discord.

“If I could do that, I’d have already whisked her and her angry friend here in an instant!” Discord grinned evilly. “Could you just imagine the chaos those two would cause in Equestria?” Miniature, fiery mushroom clouds exploded across the flat landscape. “I’d never have to create my own entertainment ever again!”

Twilight shuddered. Let’s hope Dan never ends up here…

“Anyhow,” Discord continued, “TOK’s control of The Nexus allows them to control almost all travel between worlds. The only exceptions tend to be special artifacts, such as that mirror you used when you had a human adventure of your own, Twilight Sparkle.”

Twilight’s heart sank, the prospect of getting Pinkie back having just taken a major blow.

“So… There’s nothing we can do?” Twilight asked.

“Well, if we can somehow determine how to create a similar artifact to the mirror to serve as a gateway for Pinkie…but I’m afraid such things are rare to come by and even more rarely documented.”

Twilight sighed. “Believe me, I know. There’s no info on the mirror that took me to a human world. Starswirl the Bearded destroyed his notes on his own mirror to keep another from being created. Celestia knows how to reopen a closed mirror, but not make one from scratch…” Twilight put on a determined expression, “But I’m not giving up. I’m sure there’s some way we can get Pinkie back.”

“So!” Discord said with a smile, “I trust I’ve answered all your questions to your satisfaction?”

“Just one more.” Twilight said, her eyes narrowing. “Once you figured all this out, why didn’t you come to us instead of waiting for me to come to you?” Twilight demanded as she leveled a forehoof at Discord.

Discord grinned malevolently. “Oh, you know…I have to get my fun from somewhere and I can’t very well go around rearranging cities as I see fit anymore.”

Twilight looked like she was about to retort angrily, but Discord pierced her with a glare and held up his paw. “… Or maybe,” He continued with a serious expression, pointing back at Twilight with an outstretched talon, “I wanted to teach the new princess that being a competent leader means more than simply turning to books and friends when she needs help.”

Twilight’s hoof and expression dropped as she slowly broke eye contact with Discord and looked down at the still-barren floor. His words hitting her hard.

For the first time since her transformation, Princess Twilight Sparkle felt very small.

Flash Sentry leapt off the loveseat and onto his feet. “Now you listen here! Twilight is an excellent leader, and—” Flash was stopped as a purple wing was extended in between him and Discord.

“It’s alright, Flash,” Twilight said softly. “He’s right. When Pinkie was taken, I went straight to my books and the other princesses for help. It never even occurred to me to ask him for help…”

“But…but, Twilight…”

“It’s okay, Flash. I think I learned what I needed. Let’s go.”

Twilight and Flash looked around.

“Uh…Discord, could you…” Twilight began.

“Of course.” Discord snapped his talons, and the room returned to the bare stone walls it was before.

Twilight and Flash headed for the door. Twilight looked back at the Draconequus on her way out. “Oh, and Discord?”

“Yes, Princess?”

“Thank you,” Twilight said.

Discord smiled and gave a small bow as she parted. “Anytime. My door is always open.”

Fluttershy silently watched the two ponies leave.

“So that’s it?” Fluttershy asked. “Pinkie’s stuck in that world forever?”

Pfft…Hardly.” Discord replied. “The Order Keepers aren’t ones to let a mistake of theirs go uncorrected, especially one that could continue to disrupt their plans of mind-numbingly boring counting and calculations.” Discord said with a small sneer. “No, I’m quite certain even now they’re quietly trying to track her down. I wouldn’t be surprised if they went so far as to wage war on Equestria if that’s what it takes to send her where they want.”

“War?!” Fluttershy exclaimed, “But you said…”

Discord waved his lion paw at Fluttershy dismissively and lounged back on the couch. “I merely answered the questions our young princess asked of me. I can’t help if she didn’t ask all the right ones.” Discord said with a slight grin.

Fluttershy climbed down from the chair and stared straight at Discord. “I wonder if you would be so callous if it was me stuck on another world,” she said. Fluttershy turned and walked towards the exit.

Discord frowned. “But…you’re different,” he asserted.

Fluttershy glanced behind her and ruffled her feathers. “No. I’m not,” she said simply, breaking into a gallop as she left the room. “Twilight! Wait!”

Discord sighed and shook his head.

I suppose our young princess isn’t the only one who still needs to learn a thing or two. Maybe I should get her to teach me a lesson about friendship…

End Part 4.5

Author's Note:

Thanks for reading!

Revised. Some IDW comic references in this ones around where Twilight is talking about the mirrors.

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