• Member Since 19th May, 2013
  • offline last seen 15 hours ago

MrNelg


"You will be EXTERMINATED: With Lemons!"

T

Megan Williams had no big goals in life. Just to take over the family farm from her father. Then one day, her entire life is thrown into chaos when she finds herself transported to another world, full of magic and mythical creatures. A world where her very presence could threaten the precarious power balance that has existed for a millenia, for once there, she finds herself caught up in a political game of cat and mouse that threatens to plunge the world into war.

G1 MLP / G4 MLP Crossover

Special Thanks to Kevin Lee and Page-Mistress for their fantastic job of editing and proof reading.

Spin-off by Natomon01: Here

Chapters (6)
Comments ( 157 )

Megan and TJ eh? Looks like we have a G1 cross on our hands.

Followed, Up Voted, and Faved. It's just that damn good, and we've barely even started!

Wow, just wow. I look forward to more of this.

You should seriously consider starting a companion story to this, from the perspective of the griffons, zebras, and whoever else will turn up.

3297499 Interestingly, when I first conceived this story it wasn't from Megan's POV. The reason I made it so was because I wanted the audience to be unsure of who were the villains and heroes. One thing I've learnt when it comes to writing is a good political thriller, is to write a story were the audience has no idea whom they can trust. Maybe later, but not right now. To do so would spoil too much.

Are the Mane 6 going to be a part of this story, or is this before they were even born?

3298132 That question will be answered in chapter 3.

You should check this story out. It might give you a few ideas.

Needs a damn good proofread, but I definitely look forward to seeing more.

Well your spelling is terrible, your prose is weak, and your protagonist is dumber than a box of rocks. Overall dissapointing.

Fffffaaaascinating. Now, Megan has been traded to be Celestia and Luna's pet!

The whole Macguffin smell has me really curious... there's so much more to this story than has been shown already. I like that... it keeps me coming back.

...Why does this very interesting story have so few comments @_@

As interesting as this story is, the fact that it is apparently occurring centuries before FiM is enough for me to unfollow it.

Sorry, but politics (especially when the politics in question can't even be understood by the audience) just doesn't do anything for me. :fluttershysad:

And now the real story begins? The only thing I do not understand is why there are not at least 300 followers for this great story. All you need now is an editor for the rare mistakes.

Awesome chapter! Keep up the great work. :rainbowkiss:

This is simply amazing. Please continue your excellent work :twilightsmile:

So the big question is, what does the word Megan is mentally translating as "die" really mean? Given what we've seen of PT, even if he was nicer to Megan than Joan was, he still seemed to have an ulterior motive - and I hardly believe that the parents of the Celestia and Luna we know and love would vaporize something just because it lacked any sort of internal magic.

Very interesting, is nice to see a human in Equestria story where the victim doesn't find ponies first...

This story is going great so far, maybe you could look for a beta readers in fanfiction.net?

So Megan because Cewestia and Woona pet...

3602404 Are you certain?
I have seen plenty of sories where that would happen, or for worse reasobs. Where ponies are little better than humans, And where Equestria is an unstable Utopia, or a dytopia. Also, the seeming good nature of ponies, or celestia is caused by that creation of Utopia, and this clearly hasn't happened yet. Heck, Celestia and Luna are foal, with parents or guardians, probably making them legit princesses.

Also, what else could a hoof slid across a throat mean? It has to have a passing resekblence to the act or concept...

3662361 Fair enough. But then the question becomes "Why?"

3628240 i hope her lack of magic starts trying to gain a magic of its own, maybe when she's hurt later by discord. so her empty magic core lashes out and drags a sample of luna/celestia's magic and discord's magic to integrate it into herself. SO AWESOME :derpytongue2:

3743125

She is human, and lacks magic. Unless she ends being transformed into a non human, I don't think she will live long enough to ever meet Discord...

But then Discord could meet her when Megan is like 100 years and transformer her for fun.

I'm not really sure what's going on yet, but I approve of what I've seen thus far. I like all these little details and stuff and of course, filly Luna and Celestia are so adorable they could rot teeth with their sweetness (this is not a bad thing).

Upvoted, tracked.

3669990

She could have been translating it correctly, PT just could be lying about what the unicorns would do.

This is a pretty good story staring everyone's favorite G1 character, but still . . . Megan's going to have to become a polyglot, and fast. It's possible too. She's in a total immersion environment, and the human mind is supposed to learn languages quick in those sorts of situations. Plus, she's a fictional character, and those always tended to be polyglots before the 20th century.

Yay! FireFly is in the story! **hugs her** X3

To emphasis the point, he also gave Megan's arm a reassuring pat, speaking genital words of reassurance to her.

Should be "genial"

and after, when Megan takes the Gittern, there is a "Began," which for flow should wither be "she" or "Megan."

Very interesting, so it seems Megan not only lacks magic but maybe is immune to it? Will you have Megan facing Discord at some point?

But before she could have one, she needed to know the language, so she could find out just what it was that would make her such a threat to creatures who seemed more powerful than the entire human race.

The aura that enveloped the musical instrument simply vanished the instant she touched it.

I suspect that the reason is that humans can nullify magic.

There's nothing wrong with filler - a chance to explore a little side story and flesh out the world can be a good thing. And considering that we've introduced Starswirl as an unknown variable, determined what could potentially make Megan a threat to the unicorns, and established that the Elements had previous incarnations, I'd hardly call this filler.

Great as always :twilightsmile:
Didn't find too many grammatical errors and they were all minor. I would like to tell where they are, but I was too engrossed in the story to take note of their position :twilightsheepish:

I'm still wondering why this isn't one of the top HiE stories :raritydespair: It needs more recognition.

I was wondering why isn't there a Crossover tag since this is apparently a G1/G4 crossover.

This is great I can't wait till the next story. :rainbowdetermined2:

The most common and SOD breaking error you make in writing as far as I'm concerned is that you don't spell out numbers when you should. At a minimum you should almost always spell any single digit number, and most of the time any power of ten like "a tenth", "a hundred", "a million". And obviously all numbers should be written out if they are spoken.

Arn

Can't wait for the next chapter.:ajsmug:

I just managed to finish this story. I really like it, but it took me rather long to get through it, not because there's anything wrong with it, but because of the way I usually read. The complete lack of dialogue means it is 100% descriptive text, making it much denser and harder to parse than most prose. I have to consciously read every sentence rather than just absorb it like I usually do.

Good God in the foothills, this was something you'd give a baby, not a fully grown adult woman. She wouldn't be caught dead wearing this even if she were twelve years old.

*snicker* Hey, it was the eighties.

There's something weird going on with the sun/moon raising. Megan started to notice the sun was moving a bit too fast when they made landfall. In other words, in the rest of the world, they act normally, and it's only in (what may not yet be called) Equestria that the unicorns control them. What the sixty-nine is up with that, do they have different heavenly bodies from the rest of the planet?

4642453 Thanks for being patient. I'm trying to get to the meat of the story but there's other things I need to point out and mention so that when they play a part later on, it dosen't come across as I just pulled it out of thin air.

*snicker* Hey, it was the eighties.

I really, really hated that outfit.:facehoof: It made Megan look too ridiculous for someone who was supposed to be a strong character.

There's something weird going on with the sun/moon raising. Megan started to notice the sun was moving a bit too fast when they made landfall. In other words, in the rest of the world, they act normally, and it's only in (what may not yet be called) Equestria that the unicorns control them. What the sixty-nine is up with that, do they have different heavenly bodies from the rest of the planet?

Well, yes and no. I got the idea from watching the Cutie Mark Chronicles in which Celesta raises the sun rather hastily. I've also noticed in other episodes we've never seen the sun raise that fast before, so I figure its only done in times of celebration, like the summer sun festival. So what's going on is, like the raising of the moon before that large crowd, it's a special occasion, IE the return of the royal family from overseas. I don't want to reveal too many details, because they tie into why Megan will be killed if her secret is found out.

4643611

Thanks for being patient. I'm trying to get to the meat of the story but there's other things I need to point out and mention so that when they play a part later on, it dosen't come across as I just pulled it out of thin air.

Oh, I'm not complaining. I should also mention that while you call this chapter filler, I don't see it that way at all.

Although if there's one thing that I'm a little impatient about it's that so far, Megan's had basically no agency at all, which is kind of a shame for what's indeed a strong character (one of her canon version's first actions was to deck a freaking demon in the face, if that's not enough to cement her badass credentials, I don't know what is). So far she's had basically zero chance to act of her own volition, being carted around like a piece of luggage, sometimes literally. I'm looking forward to the point when she can finally make a move of her own rather than be someone else's pawn.

So what's going on is, like the raising of the moon before that large crowd, it's a special occasion, IE the return of the royal family from overseas.

I see, that makes more sense.

I don't want to reveal too many details, because they tie into why Megan will be killed if her secret is found out.

I have a few suspicions of my own about that. It'll be interesting to see how close to the truth I actually got.

4662869

Although if there's one thing that I'm a little impatient about it's that so far, Megan's had basically no agency at all, which is kind of a shame for what's indeed a strong character (one of her canon version's first actions was to deck a freaking demon in the face, if that's not enough to cement her badass credentials, I don't know what is). So far she's had basically zero chance to act of her own volition, being carted around like a piece of luggage, sometimes literally. I'm looking forward to the point when she can finally make a move of her own rather than be someone else's pawn.

This is all part of Megan's character development. She starts out weak, but will grow strong over time. This is why I mentioned in the synopsis that she had no major goals in life. She just wants a carefree life with no big problems or worries. She likes to think she's a smart, strong woman, but she isn't. I guess what I haven't really translated across to the readers is that she's trapped and alone in a world where she has no idea what's going on, and she's looking for a life preserver; any life preserver. Hence why she allows herself to be carted around. She wants a protector to cling too, in order to get some form of comfort and security.
All that's going to change soon, forcing Megan to finally toughen up and be a strong woman. Again, I don't want to give away too much, but like I said, I feel I haven't gotten that point across.

4663697
To be fair, what could she have done? So far, she's been nearly eaten, drugged, locked up, drugged again, and then confined first to a boat in the middle of the sea, then a heavily guarded palace, then an airship in mid-flight. All the while knowing next to nothing about anything. Keeping quiet, and her eyes and ears open, was the smartest thing she could do, really.

Nice story. Why updates so few?

4729768 Sorry, but my life's been pretty busy lately and left me little time to write. What little time I do have I squander on sleeping and games. Again, it's my fault for being lazy.

4733842
Its sin to abandon story like this to games.

Hm; Just found this story - It's been pretty good so far... can't wait until the next chapter comes out. :derpytongue2:

And now comes the worst part. Waiting for new chapters.

Just please don't make the wait as long as the last one.

she had forgotten that books designed to teach a language to toddlers did not have plots. If you had to teach the words for ball and tree and run, telling a story was impossible. Megan knew that. And she hated every minute of it.

Well someone looks like they might be a Watts Martin fan. :twilightsmile: Rabbit Pens?

And for some baseless speculation...
The magic giger counter doesn't go dark because she doesn't have magic. It goes dark because she's absorbing and/or destroying magic. Like everything has some kind of temperature - and for an object to register at 0 kelvin, it's has to be actively cooled, or is absorbing and destroying heat. That is something the unicorns might find a little concerning... :twilightoops:

Alternatively,... No Magic = Alien = "The horror! The horror!" :twilightsmile:

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