In a place known as the Soul Society, soul reapers have always kept the balance of life and death. But when that balance is disrupted, it is up to the Soul Society's finest to make everything right. For this reason, Byakuya Kuchiki, and Toshiro Hitsugaya, are sent to Equestria in order to prevent their world and Equestria from slipping into darkness.
Inspired by Dirty Bit's cuatro
Bleach crossover.
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The story is looking good, keep up the good work
The dislikes are hollows .-.
I shall be watching...
BLEACH CROSSOVER?!?! YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES! I shall read now.
Good concept and I like where this is going already. I will be awaiting updates
On her throne, or in her throne room.
Nothing stood out that needed fixing other than the occasional overuse of commas
Don't worry, that kind of thing happens to just about everyone. I recommend reading it out loud to yourself or having someone else read to catch those spots were a pause from a comma just isn't necessary.
3371839 I shall definitely do that from now on. Thanks for the advice.
One thing. Feel, I feel bad.
Fell, I fell out of my chair.
Other then that it's perfect! Keep it up!
Niiiiice
More, up + fav
Finally, a Bleach crossover that gets names and personalities right.
You really could use an editor, I noticed several small spelling errors that only stuck out as I read past them. Most were easily forgettable common mistakes, but it wouldn't hurt to have someone run through it with a fine comb a few times.
Not a bad start. Renji is spelt with a 'j' though. Not a fan of Renji x rukia, but I'm guessing that's only in the first chapter? XD
Pretty good concept and I hope you carry it through well, but there is something that worries me. I hope you come up with a good reason why the soul reapers are going to let the ponies continue on with their misconceptions. I can already see ponies repeatedly attacking them because the soul reapers were to mindless as to disobey an obviously flawed order.
If you need an better explanation and description of this sort of flaw, go read "Beyond Equestria" and the comments for it.
3373736 The story has just started, and there will be plenty of explanations later about the 'flaw' in the orders they were given. All will be revealed in good time.
3373532 can't believe I made that mistake
and yes, we won't be seeing much of those two for a very long time.
I've never been into Bleach, needless to say I followed the story very well, and I'm hooked. I can't wait for the next chapter. There's many ways you could expand on the story so far, I'm interested to see what you're going to do around the effect of this situation on the whole of Equestria, and the ongoing misconception of who's really trying to do harm to the world. Also, I like the way you made sure the characters never went OOC, the dialogue felt true to each one.Oh, and I'll edit it for you, get rid of all those little spelling errors and stuff like thatP.S.
Nice cock
Good so far, moar plz
3373193
There is this...
... Get Kenpachi in here.
3377898
Dude, Kempstchi, are you trying to overkill the multiverse there?
Itchigo could end up here as well, i mean we know he is always up for kicking hollows bums, and i can see him still be, "compitablee with the ponies"
3378202
Dude, there is no such thing as overkill. Only Kenpachi.
3377898 His smile is...... lethal.
Celestia should be Aizen using his shikai! It makes so much sense!
I love the story, but I can't help shake the feeling that this story is going to get a super long "break" very early in the first few chapters, or only get updated once every few months. Sry for my lack of faith :( it is just that most good stories like this are neglected by the author. I hope you are not one of them.
3392119 Fortunately, I do not consider myself to be 'one of those authors' I shall do my very best to update the story every week, and I already have the next chapter started and moving along nicely. I shall then send it to my editor(Nerdbox) and the chapter will hopefully be up before the start of each new week.
Whne will new chapter be uploaded?
3413343 Soon...
3417264 how soon?
It sounds like a good story :) can't wait for what comes next.
I was kind of thinking "WHAT THE FUCK ARE SAYING?! WHO CARES!" when Twilight asked how we should call the new "creatures".
Also, I don't think Celestia is the kind of mare to say "Let's kill monsters"
3377898
Ahah, he would be bored as hell... yup, he would totally kill everypony on the planet.
3431079 Tomorrow
....interesting
Mmmmmm... It seems a bit contrived to me... But I'll go with it...
i believe you meant acquainted rather than antiquated and creatures rather creator. Small errors but other than that im enjoying this so far.
...Mayor Mare has a button that signals Pinkie. That is more amazing than Celestia having a bankai.
So Celestia is a Soul reaper?
...Wow, it's hard to say how that revelation makes me feel, but I think this a fine example of an interesting concept taking a weird, if not bad turn, and why people should always wait before casting their 'like'. I can't wait to see how you justify Celestia having a zanpakuto, yet not having the ability to recognize soul reapers or even know what they are.
Don't even try to say something like she never saw human one's before, either. As is made clear throughout the anime, soul reapers, hollows, arrancar, humans, and the various other souls have very distinct feels to them. Celestia, apparently being spiritually inclined, as well as all ponies it seems, should have been able to tell that the soul reapers were not hollows or even malevolent.
Then there is the fact that you are probably going to go the path of the 'Powerful Princesses', which, in my opinion, is one of the worst fandom creations. Celestia and Luna are not godly powerful or skilled warriors, Chrysalis proved that pretty well. No doubt you'll have it so pony princesses will be able to fight on even terms with the captains by merely having their zanpakuto's, as if that would be enough to bridge the huge gap you placed between their abilities in the second chapter.
The fact that Celestia has a zanpakuto is, in itself, weird. You relies that means she is always in spirit form correct? you can't have a zanpakuto in your mortal body. Making it so all ponies are spiritually sensitive makes this believable because all ponies can see her, but I hope you have thought of that and weren't just going to throw that in there half-assed.
Lastly, what was with the needless bankai release? there are more realistic ways to tell the readers that Celestia somehow has a soul cutting sword than to have her do something so energy intensive needlessly.
Well, I'll read when you finish another chapter, hopefully a little quicker this time, and hope you can somehow make me believe in the events of your story, but I can't see how you'll do it. Good luck and hope you get a proofreader.
3440606 spoiler
shit just got real.
Faust bucking damn it. (Face-palms)
Celestia...soul reaper?....bankai? using it whiteout a fight? In my opinion that´s a little "crazy".
3444288
Well, technically Ichigo's father is a soul reaper... who knew? She could be...but yeah, without explanation it sure is crazy
Update?
When Celestia said Bankai i face palmed so hard
3440953 Indeed, neither Princess seems very skilled in battle.
Twilight and Rainbow Dash however... why, just look what they can do!
3440953
Not true chrysalis was simply juiced up on love and the battle between night mare moon and celestia also showed they have powerful destruction magic true there not at god levels but by no means push overs.
3830977
Ok, Toshiro and the Head Capetian both seem a bit OOC. The HC felt a bit too much like Dumbledore, the wise old man, instead of Genryusai Shigekuni Yamamoto, Head Captain of the 13 Court Guard Squads, and one of the strongest beings to ever exist.
Toshiro felt too much like a fascinated kid. He's forced himself to mature for the sake of Momo and his position of Captain.
Other than that and a few instances of forgetting to start a new paragraph when someone else starts speaking, this is going pretty good!
I'mma wait till this updates to give it a like. There needs to be a good explanation for why the hell Celestia has a Zanpakuto.
Tia is a soul reaper? Please meet Ichigo. Lololol!