Is the a side-story to breaking point or is bp already finished ?

>>261479261479 Breaking Point is finished. Reckoning is the sequel.

You really should update bp's status to complete, It makes things clearer

Glad to see this on FimFiction. Tracked. And YOU are a man/women of few words. hopefully this place will make you talk. *Laughs Manically while rubbing hooves together* Indeed it will...

Romance? 0_o Applejack x Vanguard is the only shipping that springs to mind. I take it that's going to go a lot further then.

suddenly, the chapters are longer! And everything is shiny and new! it's like a whole new story! Anyway, great writing as always. nothing much more to say, as this was sort of filler.

Nice chapter - AJ's gonna' use a kusari! One of my favorite weapons! And if you consider her skill with a lasso, it makes quite a good deal of sense. Oh, fighting chains, how you set my heart aflutter.

Yes.... moorree!!! Can't wait for the next one! It's gunna be awshum!

Add another chapter to breaking poit, telling everyone that there is a sequel. I'm lucky I saw the EQD post about it.

good to see this has been posted here

will the EQD link be to here, fanfiction.net, or both?

Quick! use your lasso of truth Wonderwo- *coughs I mean Applejack

DUN DUN DUUUN

YES!! IT UPDATED!! Now to read it in 10 minutes and wait for the next one.... *Reads* Shit. She said yes. Can't wait to watch/read teh next action scene with Night Mare. I eagerly await the next chapter.

Aw man I hope they don't have to kill scarlet rabbit, he's awesome.

What's that, Dash? You need to perform some foolhardy heroics to prove yourself and make up for that time one of your best friends had to be saved by divine intervention because you got her killed trying to perform some foolhardy heroics to prove yourself?

I know! Why not accept that challenge from the guy you got your friend killed trying to impress? The crazy one that your superiors and friends all warned you to steer clear of. You know, the visibly deranged lunatic who tried to kill the last guy he raced? Who's on his last strike before they put him down like a rabid dog, as a public service? The guy who's fast enough to snatch you from the head of the march without anyone noticing, and strong enough that he can overpower you without any visible effort on his part, all while wearing armor? And hey, he doesn't want any witnesses – that's cool, right?

Meanwhile, Pinkie is attracting Earth Pony supremacists. Their sect has turned their backs even on their own kind in the past, so I expect their loyalty to the well-being of Equestria is less than certain. I doubt Pinkie would give up her friends just to please some bigoted strangers – rather, I think it's more likely that they won't be willing to leave a pony of her talents amongst... undesirable influences.

Oh, Rainbow...

I'm fascinated to know that Pinkie Sense might have its roots in actual science, and that she's not breaking the 4th Wall or any some such.  Even if those True Earth Ponies are really creepy and kinda crackpottish.

Hey Pinkie can you say sanctioned psyker?

Awesome, glad to see the Upheaval stories posted to this site.

Also

Im hoping for some  sort of acknowledgement of the fact that, regardless of beliefs, pegasi continue to be able to sit on, "milk", move and shape clouds, even in the barrier  lands.  That should allow control of the weather, regardless of beliefs, if they  just tried.  I'm also awaiting word on pinkie's teleportation, fourth wall, shapeshifting, contortionist and bard powers.  And i do mean powers, just read any fanfic or watch the series over again.  In war, offscreen teleportation, hammerspace, charisma (already shown), and rubber limbs, if not limited to rule of  funny, are near-demigodlike powers, and would give her actual advantages as the group progresses to more powerful enemies.

Fluttershy's Stare, liberated  from simple emergency use by Iron will, as well as her druid abilities should be equally helpful in crowd control and summoning.

That would finally allow the "useless" members of the mane six to start participating in earnest rather than being lumped into The Load, which would really disappoint me.

Notmally i would be inclined to say Dash's sonic rainboom and rainnuke would make her op if unlocked from their place as last resorts, but as with  Pimkie and Fluttershy's normally op powers, war is the great equalizer, and Scarlet is already borderline Marty Stu, so I'd say give Dash all the advantages you can.

As a "normal" earh pony without magic or flight or the fourth wall, this would leave Applejack nearly useless, so slowly removing Truth-realted abilities (shield of truth, Truthsight, living lie detector, dispell  charm, dispell illusion, etc) would make the mane six balanced given what they have  to deal with out here.  It would also mqke them ponies worthy of being calledelements of harmony.  Otherwise, the six would just become a troupe of useless, angsty background characters while overpowered oc's took center stage.  And that would be quite a tragedy.  Regardless, however, i cannot say i don't enjoy the story; in fact, i love the work done so far.  It just seems my two favorite ponies are being brushed aside, and i've come  to expect much more.  Keep up the good work!

Oh... wow.

Wondering what happened to her. Oceanus now coming into play as the Big Bad in this story?

o…kay that was unexpected in so many ways.

Well, not all, I knew Pyre would do anything for Nightmare Moon to be killed.

What I didn't expect was that the elements of Harmony would actually work.

Or the thing that happened at the end... What exactly happened at the end? Why were the physical Elements of Harmony destroyed?  Where did Twilight go? Did Oceanus just intervened? Or was it someone else? Or maybe it was Moon Shadow herself using some kind of slip from Pyre's concentration? And who exactly is Moon Shadow? "Master Oceanus, your handmaiden beseeches you!" - doesn't sound too good.

With this chapter, a single action packed chapter we lost Twilight and the elements of Harmony. And the worst part is, now I know the next chapter will take place in Heartland because this is big enough cliffhanger to torture us with for next week or two.

If I'm to guess where twilight is, I think she went to wherever Pyre/Nightmare Moon went.

so now we have a quest to find Twilight

a quest to find Black Rose... who might also want to find Twilight

a quest to figure out what happened to the elements... although I suspect the physical manifestations aren't really that important.

and there will probably be few side quests involving each of the main characters, such as AJ and the past of her family, Pinkie and the creepy earth pony magic thingy, Fluttershy savng Redbrand's soul, RD's race with Scarlet (and potential romance/tragedy afterwards)... and something for Rarity... oh, and Spike... and... oh forget it... it looks like Breaking Point was just a prologue.

AM.

red-blowing when Twilight was nuking the gates (like a boss), probably supposed to be red-glowing.

Master Oceanus, your handmaiden beseeches you!

Woah, can't wait to see the backstory that this appears to start introducing. Considering the rebellions prophecy I've been wondering when Oceanus was going to start making his presence known.

>>341033341033 Well, Moon Shadow is the name the Wolven gave to Pyre Valor/Nightmare Moon.  But I hope Oceanus isn't the Big Bad, at least not yet.  We already have one Big Bad in the person of Black Rose.

>>341106341106

I know that Moon Shadow is just wolven name for Nightmare Moon. I'm just curious what she actually is... aside from being Oceanus' follower and an ancient one at that... on a mission for her master.

I think Oceanus summoned Moon-Shadow because of her call, and Twilight happened to be close enough to get caught up in the moment. It's a possibility, at least, and it makes sense. Because of the rush of battle and (supposedly) extreme distance between Oceanus and Moon-Shadow, he may have had to guesstimate his teleportation spell and use a slightly larger area of effect than he wanted to. Even for an alicorn, that would be difficult.

Or, Oceanus's dormancy could be in a spacial warp, partially connected and disconnected from reality, and they were summoned there, which could explain the Elements breaking with one of them being outside of the current reality.

Or you can just ignore me and my sci-fi obsessed mind, I'm probably wrong on both counts.

Anyway, another epic chapter. Can't wait for the next one.

good thing it was established earlier with AJ that the true elements come from within, not from mere trinkets.

I hate you for making a cliffhanger at this points xD

Nice, a little NMM backstory, and some Twilight & Pyre Valor...bonding?

Also, if NMM has a mortal body somewhere, sounds like an important thing for the legion to know about. I wonder if the royal trio will recognize those names?

so... Moon Shadow is her real name :D

also... Solar Flare? I think. My Latin got a little rusty :p

Well, that was definitely unexpected. Here I was thinking that there will be two more chapters before wee hear from Twilight again and she'll be stranded somewhere far away and she just got teleported few miles away. It's a very fortunate thing too :D

As for Pyre Valor... I have very mixed feelings about her. There's a pretty high chance that she'll be executed but there also is a pretty high chance that something will happen that might spare her life. She might be to valuable with all the knowledge she might have from Nightmare Moon. One thing I'd love to see is Celestia talking with her.

...right.. what happened to Celestia anyways? It's a week or so since Terrato turned her into an earth pony.

Also, Twilight-Pyre ass-kicking duo FTW :D

I wanted to draw a Pyre vs Twilight picture, now I think it will be Twilight and Pyre vs something picture :D

This was a epic chapter. You had me on edge when Twilight found out she was surrounded. I almost thought you were gonna waste her ass. I wouldn't put it past you, no offence, you just seem like the type of author that isn't afraid to let something badass and sad happen for the good of the story! Which isn't a bad thing mind you.

Keep up the good work dude. This is a story like no other, and I can't wait to see more of it.

Hmm. I'm guessing Pyre will be sentenced to death, but she asks to duel Twilight as a last request, so they fight in the courtyard as everypony watches. Then Twilight will win and they make up as she dies, and everypony realizes Pyre wasn't really evil as they all cry over her corpse. Calling it now.

Either that or she gets her head lopped off

Prye could easily play the 'nightmare-moon-made-me-do-it' card but I don't actually see her doing that. I think twilight will ask to duel her and not kill her. Then pyre goes off into the north on a rampage to make up for what she's done.

We've spent a long time seeing Pyre Valor as an antagonist.  I'm glad the rest of the characters seem to be having as hard of a time as me adjusting to the "new" Pyre Valor.  I wouldn't go so far to say I think she's Good, but perhaps she's... opportunistic?  Right now I'd put her at Lawful Neutral or maybe True Neutral, from what little I know.  Certainly not Evil or Chaotic.

Lunalux Umbra and Solis Coruscaria.  Lunalux I know.  That's Moonlight Shadow, the Nightmare Moon.  But Sun Shine?  He makes me nervous.

How are you interpreting his name?  "Solis," according to Google Translate, can mean "the sun" or "the only".  And while "coruscaria" means "shining" it also has a daystar connotation to it.  So is he "The One and Only Sun Shine"?

I sincerely hope there'll be no Twilight x Pyre romance, which I don't think you'll do, but still.

boom first

Found a mistake!

"In the Heartland’s entire history, cutie marks involving the things that the legion did will start appearing."

woah, two in one :D

Celestia is taking her corpse duty better than i expected, but then again, she probably saw enough in her life to deal with it. she is not innocent herself and I keep forgetting about that.

I'm curious how will this experience change her views on the barrier lands and pones who live there.

As for Luna... she has a though job to do, but it's good to know that there is no wide-spread panic in the Heartland after the decree. it doesn't mean there won't be any panic when legionnaires starts appearing and do their thing. It is still an unknown what would be the attitude of barrier land ponies towards the chosen.

We also learned that cutie marks will still appear and that some of the enchantments Celestia made are still in place.

Also, in this chapter you referred to Nightmare Night episode, that Luna visited Ponyville before.

but in chapter 7 of Breaking point you wrote:

True enough, a crowd began to gather around the street. Twilight joined them to get a closer look. She hadn't seen Princess Luna since the defeat of Nightmare Moon. She couldn't help but be a little curious as to how the younger princess was doing. With Spike on her back, she slipped through the crowd to improve her view, making sure that she didn't push rudely against any pony. She managed to get to the front of the crowd in time to see the princess show up.

So you might want to change that somehow.

awesome, im looking forward to seeing how celestia reacts when she hears that twilight disappeared in a giant explosion (panic and anger i presume) only to hear a while later that she is safe and back, the 'a while later' as i think that terrato probably tries to keep her disappearance a secret to celestia (instead she hears about it randomly or something)

Just found this here! Good to know I can keep a good track of it here when I don't go on Equestria Daily.

>>384716384716 I may be reading it wrong, but where is the mistake? I can't seem to find it.

Is Vanguard going to stick with one pony(applejack or twilight) or will he be a twit, agonise both and them and force me to find a new favourite charecter in this fic(I really can't say who right now. Compared to Vanguard, the others are a tad not favourite pony material)

Hmm...Interesting. Carry on then.

God I love this series...

And an update just before I go to bed, too good.

You know. I have no idea what inspired you to write this. But holy shit man. This story, is one of the coolest things I've ever read. In all seriousness, I dread the day when this comes to it's conclusion. Just know, that even if you don't have hundred's of follower's like ImJustAnotherBrony, or TheGentlemanCreeper, or what have you. The people who do watch you, think you are just as good a writer.

Drama! Angst! Tragedy in the making!

This could get (even more) interesting.

Really love the naming conventions for those drinks ^^

Well, good try Rares, but some ponies don't want to be helped. It was a little unfair though to tell AJ she should step aside simply because she is less scary at the moment.

Don't really have anything to say about Vanguard and Pyre, that conversation went about as expected.

hmm, Vanguard still has feelings for Pyre and she still has feelings back...

so now Applejack knows about the love triangle with her, Vanguard, and Twilight, and she's not stepping aside, Vanguard might know about it, he know's that he has feelings for Twilight, and now with Tailwind being the observant one, he might get that both mares like him

I'm still waiting for a chapter with Spike and Seethe Scale, that should be interesting

as always, can't wait for more!

Brilliant stuff as always.

huzzah for rarity having genre saviness!

*takes a deep breath*

wow

ok so first of all, in my  mind the impending execution of probably the biggest traitor of the Legion since the original Black Rose rebellion takes a second place to a certain love triangle that was finally pointed out and addressed after what might as well be half of this epic story.

And it's not because I don't care about Pyre's fate. Also, nobody cares about Blademane <_<.

Drunk Rarity is still the most level-headed pony, although she is at the same time a cold hearted b*** for confronting Applejack about her feelings like that and outright telling her to back off because nothing good will ever come out of this. Which is of course true.  Rarity also perfectly pointed out what is my concern about Twilight, who went through a lot and is slowly turning into a ticking time bomb. We know how Twilight acts under pressure and right now I think the only reason she's holding together is that she has a set of goals. However whatever will happen to Pyre (execution being the most probable event in here immediate future) could affect Twilight's well-established priorities. The fact that Applejack will probably confront her about her feelings toward Vanguard won't help too much as well. Add the loss of Elements of Harmony, race between RD and Scarlet (now that the fortress has been retaken there is no way Scarlet will be patient about that) and whatever will Pinkie get involved in... the attractions just keep piling higher and higher.

And that's just our favorite team, we haven't heard from Black Rose since the end of the previous part.

And a random thought at the end: Rarity just increased her chances to steal number one spot from Twilight in this story. I hope she will have more screen time in future chapters :D

Looks like Rarity has her shipping goggles on.

In all seriousness though, I hope there's no fighting between Applejack and Twilight. Though knowing how stories go, it's probably inevitable.

I knew this love triangle / square was going to get serious eventually... I more support TwilightxVanguard in this moment

Also, either Pyre gets rescued by Twilight or she dies like she deserves to.

Hmn, the 'Warsinger' and a need for someone skilled enough to play for it. A role for Octavia or Lyra, perhaps?

Does the name Coruscaria come from somewhere specific? This is the second war-fic where I have seen that used.

Woot, they get to go home for a while!

first of all, my suspicions about the chain's enchantments are true, awfully convenient, but true.

I rarely complain about your writing but I must say I am a little disappointed with that scene with Mane six and Celestia, it could be longer and more emotional.

the reason why the elements went bye bye... that I almost guessed.

Threesome with Nightcanter... you're just giving us more shipping material, aren't you?

and now the two big things:

Terrato dismissing the special care squad and sending them off to the Heartland... I'm not sure if I like the first part, but the second part is definitely something I'll be looking forward to. this might be a very interesting experience :D Terrato might be doing a bad thing separating them though. they have to work on their friendship to deal with their issues and for that they need to be close. He will need the Elements sooner or later and he must realise that.

and as we can see in the second big thing: Black Rose is not only on the move but her brother appears to be working on betraying her. so it's obvious that Terrato will either call the mane six back together soon to deal with her, or he won't even get a chance to actually divide them in the first place. Of course sending them to their homes and giving them a common goal as well as some time to think about what happened might be exactly what he thinks will get them back in sync again.

in either way, lots of things to look forward to in the future :D

The plot thickens . . .

I expect that if anyone's going to attempt to argue in Pyre's defense, it's probably going to be Celestia.

Good story, well written- nice idea with the return to the Heartland. Should be fun to see how their perceptions of their home has been changed by their experiences.

Also, the throwaway mention of Prince Blueblood has led me to think that he would be one of the first to be conscripted, considering his high position and status. It might be interesting to see how he deals with the differences between his former life and the borderlands.

>>369602369602

*whistle* I didn't pay too much attention to the names. Glad to have people like you around to shed some light on it all! "The One and Only Sun Shine"? The only way to make that sound more badass is to have it in Latin, which it is

Pyre Valor still has weight on all of this. She already achieved her goals, but she remains loyal to the Legion. She only has its best interests in mind, after all. I suspect she'll become a shackled soldier of some sort. But hey, I'm writing this with 3 chapters to read, so it's for you to know and me to find out!

“Sleep?” Rarity muttered as she watched one half OF a growing problem walk away.

Off to the next chapter!

I still like my translation for Solis Coruscaria: "The One and Only Sun Shine".

The Warsinger, eh?  I'm calling it right now: Lyra will be turning evil.  Perhaps making an Ursula-type deal to gain a pair of Hands.

Does this Fimfiction page have a link from EqD?

>>435580435580 no it still links to fanfiction.net, not sure why Visiden hasn't told the EQD people to add a link to here yet

>>438170438170

TBH that is probably the only reason i have not read it yet.  The ratings and comments on fimfiction help to figure out if the story is any good and fanfiction has none of those.

>>438193438193 I also rely on comments/ratings all the time, everyone probably does

if you haven't read this story, then go read the previous one in the series: Breaking Point, if you haven't already

If you are hesitating to read this story, I'll say this: don't, it's one of the best fan-fics I've read, and anyone whose read this story will probably back me up when I say that, if you need any more convincing I'll gladly write a wall of text detailing in great length and detail why you should read this story

yeah, I agree that fanfiction.net is sub-par, but they have so many more stories, from not just ponies, but yes not having a ratings system sucks, though people would probably just spam/abuse it anyway

>>438270438270

Alright dude, this'll be the next fic i read.

And I'll give you my short list of best stories out of the about 100 fics I have read.  These were either mind-bowing or unbelievably epic.

Best Night Ever

Ponies Make War

Alicorn    The last chapter of this one is what really makes it great.

And these are incredibly awesome stories but not quite to the level of those above IMO

Expectations

The Moonstone Cup

Duties

My Little Alicorn

Sharing the Night

The End of Ponies

Night's Favoured Child

There are probably others I have forgotten about because they are not on my list on fimfiction or the author disappeared.  I just had to get that out of my system, lol.

>>439680439680 thanks for the recommendations, so many fan-fics, so little time...

here are my favorite stories, these are the one's which I found to be impossibly good:

Equestria: Total War

The Color You Bleed

The Flight of the Alicorn

and this story

second tier of stories:

Under the Northern Lights

Gilda Versus Knitting

Banishment Decree

The Ballad of Echo the Diamond Dog

At Home on the Range

>>439734439734

Thanks, man!  I'll be sure to read them... eventually.

Image: http://web.me.com/robinsonalexc/Hobbies/OSX_Theming_files/awesome_face___HD_by_ConnorJones2610.png

The thing I'm still most looking forward to is the interaction between Rainbow Dash and Scarlet Rabbit. For some reason, I find their dynamic really entertaining.

Also, I hope their experiences in the war don't make them stop pursuing their dreams. Hopefully they don't try to go career. Hopefully Applejack fully intends to return home (the place she got her cutie mark over) and Rainbow Dash continues to strive for the Wonderbolts. Hopefully Fluttershy will be able to put the horrors of the war behind her and go back to her cottage and good life in Ponyville, along with Rarity. Hopefully Twilight doesn't lose herself trying to become a better warrior-mage for Equestria and Celestia.

>>439851439851 >>439734439734

I recommend "the Age of Wings and Steel", which is a lot like this, except the main character isn't a fighter at all (he's a cripple), which makes him all the more compelling as a protagonist in a story set during a war.

Also, a shameless plug of Night's Favoured Child.

>>449854449854

Oh man.  I forgot about your story when I made my list, it is one of my favorites and should be up there (i'll fix that).  It's been a while since I have read it so I don't remember all the details but I do remember how interesting the senario of nightmare moon ruling is and I love the OC characters.  I will reread it when I get the chance.  I can't help but wonder if any of the other mane six will show up.  I eagerly await your next installment, no need to rush though!

>>439734439734

Thanks for telling me to read Upheaval because it is amazing!  I am in the middle of reading it (chapter 43) and am just taking a break to post this.  I must now go and read more!

>>449854449854 yeah, rainbow is beginning to have feelings for scarlet, though they're hidden by their rivalry, it will be interesting how that plays out, with their soon to come race

um, sadly enough, joining up with the legion is a lifetime commitment, and the only way out other then death, or special circumstances is retirement, and even then you are expected to serve again if called upon, so unless the war ends, there's no getting out of the legion for Twilight and her friends, what will be interesting, is to see how they deal with this fact as time goes on, and it might be sooner rather then later, given they're going back to the heartland to see their families (I'm expecting to see a lot of 'we were so nieve/innocent back then' moments, then realizing that was only six-ish weeks ago)

I doubt Rainbow wants to join the Wonderbolts anymore, given there are bigger fish to fry in the legion (Scarlet being one of them) plus the Wonderbolts will probably get drafted into the legion in accordance with one member per chosen family decree

for Fluttershy and Rarity it's probably too late already, once you've seen war, there's no going back...

seeing if Twilight will slip slowly into obsession (or not so slowly), will be interesting

will read both of those fics when I have the time

A lot of talking and a lot of thinking in this one, but we learn many interesting things.

First of all, The Blasphemous Rift. It's in Heartland and I'm suddenly reminded of Twilight's little trip to Tartarus to return a missing Cerberus :P

in any case, it looks interesting.

And as honest as Blue Moon's betrayer looks to him and everyone else, I'm not convinced that it isn't just Black Rose playing with everyone again. But seeing as this might be the main quest here, lets focus on the side plots for a while.

So Terrato is indeed planning to separate the elements and make them grow independently and Celestia wants to keep them together and make sure they don't drift apart. In the end, they will probably do something in the middle. I'm pretty sure they will be stationed in the Fangbreaker so it's not like they won't be seeing each other, but it's a huge fortress and I'd imagine different units are stationed in different places in it. Will AJ and Twilight join the special operations and if they do, will that bring them more together or apart due to the tensions between them they are not even aware exist yet?

And we also have the trip home. I don't think Terrato will send them on hoof to Heartland, it would probably take weeks if it takes few days to get from Fangbreaker to the Bastion City. Unless that's the point and he wants them to travel together for weeks.

The next important thing would be Pyre's execution and Twilight's talk with her. I'm not expecting a heartwarming scene here, more like both mares talking one over the other about ow stupid the other one is. And I'm not even going to guess what the end result might be. Pyre might get really pissed off at Twilight an break the restrains, or Twilight might bet really pissed off... or anything in between.

Also, wasn't it said in the one of the previous chapters that the horn restraining thing in Pyre's horn is the only one in the fortress? If so, how will they restrain Blue Moon's horn? Or were there new supplies delivered in the mean time?

>>450664450664

they could cut it off by it i mean Blue Moon's horn.

anyway good chapter liking were things are going but it feels as if everything you have wrote so far is just the set up or is it just me?

also y u no got more views all the crap fics are getting views in the over 9000 mark yet this is soooo much better than most of them.

btw you should have meet the d dogs with her sword.

Interesting bit of additional backstory on the Eternal Herd. And other heavenly realms exist?

>>450895450895

Well if you see the Eternal Herd as "Heaven", then you can imagine some place like Hell, or Purgatory, or whatever your beliefs make you think. I'm sure there are plenty, but I doubt we'll see any more past what we already have (the place where Lexicus is and the Rift). I'm guessing the latter is filled with Oceanus' minions and will bring about the Grand Age of Immortals or whatever Black Rose wants to accomplish with said Rift. It's supposedly the ninth rebellion, so I'm pretty sure this means some kind of appocalypse.

Hopefully our little ponies and the power of friendship can stop all that is unholy in this world!

Hells yes, love this story.

Something tells me that they're going to get more than they would ever ask for if they catch Rainbow... I feel sorry for them already.

And Spike becomes a meat eater.

Eww, I hope Dash doesn't have an unpleasant bout with slavery in her future. Seems like this must be the start of the plot line that will address her and Scarlet's issues.

I foresee Scarlet and RD being enslaved and taken to Snakeland. The story will likely detail their life there. I can't help but wonder how long this series will be. It seems like it's gonna be a huge epic-length yarn. You just got so much going on that a long series seems the only way to play out all the plot threads to their full potential and wrap them up nicely. Though Scarlet and RD being trapped in Snakeland together seems a very interesting thing to go by. Especially if RD becomes some kind of "favoured slave of the Emperor".

I also kinda want to see more of Twilight and Vanguard interacting, since that seemed like a big part of the first story.

I'm not sure I like where this is going....No sir I don't like it

This seems like it has the potential to turn into a real sidetrack, and I can't say I'm really all that interested in learning about the snake people unless it somehow ties into the larger plot.

Honestly, I can't see how kidnapping either Dash or Scarlet would work without being just plain stupid. Dash is going back to the Heartland, where outsiders will stand out easily, and Scarlet is stationed in one of the most secure fortresses in the Borderlands, currently playing headquarters to Terrato himself.

Nothing about this development seems good.

This is slowly beginning to look like a one big set up for something enormous. I mean, we already have so many things hinted at. Applejack and Twilight in a rather complicated love triangle with Vanguard, Scarlet and Rainbow and their race and now the fact that Black Rose set them up to Scarlet's previous owner. Spike begins his training and with a proper dragon diet he will most probably grow faster and maybe get wings. We also have Pinkie and the True Earth Ponies and upcoming plot points for Fluttershy and Rarity(right?). Oh, and the trip back home, we can't forget about that. Each and every one of those stories would probably stand on its own. Mixed together with war on what may in the future be a war on three fronts, internal unrest, quest to regain harmony and Black Rose's rebellion, that might as well turn into multidimensional struggle for power... and I'm probably missing few plot points already.

Normally I would start guessing how will things go now, but I have a strange feeling that we're not even half way from setting things up. The question is, how will the situation unfold. For example with RD and SR: will the be kidnapped and taken by Hassyth and be rescued/escape after some time allowing us to witness some torture, abuse and conditioning and also allowing for some more character development and maybe more bonding between the two, or will that plot point serve only as a distraction. I suspect that we could expect similar plot points for other ponies as well, or at least a means to get them some more screen time and development. For Example a serious escalation of the AJ/Twi situation paired with some kind of crisis and the possibility of them being forced to work together (Vanguard's squad is still technically missing an unicorn mage and earth pony enforcer). Pinkie being pulled away by the sect of earth ponies and being indoctrinated/trained by them could also be a thing. And we're left with Rarity and Fluttershy without any support from their friends, left on their own. As much as I can see Rarity as the possibly strongest mentally of the entire six (few mental breakdowns excluded) Fluttershy's reaction to it all could be very dramatic.

Ok, I said I won't be guessing <_<

in any case, you make it harder and harder to wait for every next chapter.

And nice way to put references from Dragon Quest episode :D

Hmmm. Hopefully this will lead to more Scarlet Rabbit and Rainbow Dash baddassery.

If this  fic had clop or romance in any way I would give it a thumbs up on all ten of my accounts.

Something tells me Rainbow Dash will get captured, experience a ton of hardship and somehow manage to escape.

The real clincher to that possibility, is that the ophidites learn of her sonic rainboom, either during her stay there or used in her escape once they see that they'll consider her something along the lines of a national treasure and want her back. Like Luna to Fenrir, when the Ophidite Emperor sees that Dash has more value than just her mane, he's going to war.

Though I can see Black Rose attempting to waylay the Mane 6, I doubt she would out and out sell them to hostile nations. It's likely bait for some ploy of hers to cripple their race. Either draw him out, or attempt to sneak them in, and force a conflict she can come out ahead in.

Though obviously driven, and possibly crazy, she hasn't quite pushed the callous disregard for pony life quite yet. Those she has killed were for good reasons (to her anyways). Plus she seems the type to want to pit her guard against the Mane 6 for whatever reason. A display of dominance for her beau I'd guess.

Yes, I'm caught up and can post relevant stuff!

. . . fuck, I'm caught up.

Anyway, I think Black Rose is going to try and set stuff up so that she can either rescue RD from the Ophidites, or possibly make her choose between rescuing Scarlet or helping out someone else.

Nothing hurts Loyalty like a conflict of interests. . .

Well then, that's the end of that...

Why do I have a feeling it won't be though?

First!

Anyone else think Vanguard's going to ask for Twilight for his mage and AJ for his skirmisher?

I agree with Celestia and Twilight. If there's anything I've learned from Fo:E, it's that dying doesn't solve anything. It doesn't justify your crimes. It doesn't give anyone closure. It's just the easy way out. Nah, the way to make up for something is to spend the rest of your days doing better - trying to be the best you can be to make up for your mistakes even if you could never hope to do so. Thanks for teaching me such an important lesson, Blackjack; it's a damn shame that they don't know your story, so that they too may learn that lesson.

TL;DR Good chapter, but I dislike Terrato's methods here - Celly knows how to handle that particular issue, but there's no trust between the two of them.

Edit: But at least Celly's trying...

>>478398478398 Yeah, I don't completely buy those deaths, if only for reasons of plot.

It did read fairly convincing though.

>>478448478448

I'm not sure here. The only player that could fake her death is Black Rose. True, she does need someone to complete Throns but Pyre just showed that the only thing she cares for is her own vision of Equestria. In other words, the fact that she killed herself and the way she did it kinda points out to how strong her convictions are. Even if Black Rose resurrects them or if she just teleported them away at the last moment, she'd still have to convince Pyre to join her and "I saved your life" louses it's value when you're the one killing yourself for what you believe.

few random thoughts:

I thought Twilight will power up the spell once she understands what Pyre was doing, but I suppose she was too shocked to do that and it could also be disrespectful towards Pyre too. Still... this is one of the worst ways to die :|

on the other... hoof, Twilight's weak head got it's way to this fanfic as well.

And no surprise here, Twilight wants to join Vanguard's squad. AJ will probably ask for that too.

I wonder what is Vanguard suppose to do in Heartland. I'm guessing something to do with the Blasphemous Rift thingy

I wonder how will Ponyville react to return of the first heartland legionnaires

I wonder how will Heartland react to Celestia's return

I wonder if we will see Black Rose making a move soon

I haven't really cared much for the last couple of chapters.

Pyre and Blademane's ends are just too romanticized. Pyre wasn't better than the Black Rose rebels. They hated Celestia and wanted to bring down her barrier just as she hated Celestia and wanted to bring down her barrier. She just happened to be the most powerful among them. She didn't do more; she did worse.

Further, I'm starting to get tired of Terrato. In the larger picture, Celestia has been by far the more immature and irresponsible, but Terrato's not without faults. Whenever Celestia voices any disagreement or refers to the Legion as belonging to him, he tells her that the legion answers to her, and that its actions are ultimately her responsibility. Then, when it suits his purposes, he starts going on about "his legion" and its ways. For his claims that he remains loyal to her, he's awfully willing to browbeat and threaten her into submission. It's his legion when he wants something done, and hers when he wants her shamed. I'm hoping that someone will call him out on that.

"Vanguard shook her head" Mistake, or am I reading it wrong?

>>478401478401 First? I don't think so.

Huh. My prediction was way off. Oh well, that was a pretty badass way to go. I'd kind of forgotten Blademane had even existed though.

inb4 Black Rose brings Pyre and/or Blademane back

>>479151479151 I appear to have been ninja'd. Hate it when that happens.

>>481306481306 And I hate it when people say they're first. This worked out so well for at least one of us.

Another great chapter! Can't wait to read more.

-Minty

well thats a morbid sentiment.

Ahh, interesting to see you bring Shining Armor into this, makes me wonder if Cadence will show up. Also, I can definitely see some fun times ahead with him once the Royal Guard is pulled into the legion. Same with the Wonderbolts, for that matter.

I feel bad for Twilight's parents, they are probably going to have both of their kids pulled into the legion.