FIVE YEARS LATER
--------------
It could have happened almost any time over the past week, Twilight realised as she looked at her faint, greying cutie mark in the mirror. She didn’t spend her time admiring herself or fussing over her grooming, so she simply didn’t see her cutie mark that much- if she’d not walked past the mirror this evening after her bath, she wouldn’t have spotted the difference either. Spike could have told her, but she’d been so absorbed in her work recently that the gangling baby dragon- adolescent dragon, Twilight corrected herself, he was clearing twenty hooves tall when he walked on his hind legs- had been left pretty much to his own devices. Their routine had become that Spike would wake earlier than Twilight, make her lunch and dinner in advance, and then get her breakfast while she was waking up. They didn’t speak much over breakfast any more, and Twilight didn’t make an effort to speak to him when he got back in. That’s if she noticed his return at all- sometimes she was certain he’d been out late, only to hear him snoring in his room as she went to sleep.
In any case, he’d been spending a lot of time out of the library recently. There certainly wasn’t anypony else Twilight had seen in the last week who would have noticed the difference, the unicorn mused. It was subtle enough- the purple and white on her mark had seemed to drain in intensity, becoming pale and starting to blend in with her natural lavender coat. Sighing, she added an appendix to her most recent letter to Princess Celestia about it, and made a note in her diary to investigate it in a couple of weeks, as soon as she’d solved the Coriolis problem as applied to Everfree airflow.
Signing off the letter with a flourish, Twilight focused on the missive and it engulfed itself in green flame, burning out to nothing in a fraction of a second. Twilight smiled to herself- one of her few utility spells she still took some pride in, dragonfire sending was a feat beyond most unicorns. She’d spent months perfecting it, and now Spike was free to do as he liked, not having to wait at her beck and call whenever she needed to send a letter. Just in time, too, the unicorn remembered. The week after she’d learned the spell properly and told Spike it was off the list of things she needed him for, he’d hit his first real growth spurt. Now the dragon was tall, long-limbed, and his voice had taken on a distinctly gravelly quality.
Twilight was about to return to her notes when she felt a familiar itch at the end of her horn- a return letter from the princess? This quickly? Twilight manifested the scroll in a flash of concentration, unfurling it quickly and reading it with slowly furrowing brows.
Twilight Sparkle,
I was extremely alarmed to read of your news- a pony’s cutie mark is more than just an accoutrement we acquire at a young age that represents a talent we may wish to explore. It is one of the pillars of our personality; if yours is fading, this is grave news indeed. I have taken the liberty of sending you a series of lessons via courier, which will be delivered to you shortly. These lessons should reintroduce you to the basic three magics of our people, the pegasus, earth and unicorn pony gifts that we are blessed with.
Twilight, on a personal note, I understand that you prize your studies and hate to leave work undone, so make no mistake- it is a royal command that you attend the lessons I send you immediately. They take precedence over ALL your other research.
Yours,
Princess Celestia
Twilight snorted in derision and frustration. She hardly needed to be reintroduced to unicorn magic, she thought to herself. Pegasus and earth pony magic were probably fascinating subjects, but what good could it do her to know about them? She hadn’t got access to them. They were utterly useless to her. Irritated at the alicorn’s focus on her cutie mark, Twilight glared at her research. She’d have to put it on hold until she’d finished this errand of Celestia’s, and all because she’d been foolish enough to mention a personal matter in her letters to the princess. Well, Twilight thought to herself, in future I’ll just keep it all business. This research is too important to be put aside for long. She ignored the dinner Spike had left in the fridge, and went to bed in a foul mood. It took her a long time to fall asleep.
---------------
The next day, Twilight woke late to the sound of somepony hammering on the library door. Neglecting to brush her hair, she rolled out of bed in a grumble, ignoring the cooling waffles that had been left for her on the kitchen table by Spike- her clock said it was ten thirty. She really must have slept badly to lie in so late, she thought to herself. Opening the door, her frown was replaced by an expression of surprise. The visitor was not a pony she’d expected to see.
“Morning,” said Big Mac tersely, shouldering his way past Twilight into the library and depositing a large crate onto the floor. “This is from the P-Princess.”
The big red stallion stood there, seemingly waiting for something, and Twilight wasn’t entirely sure what to say. She hadn’t exactly left things with Big Mac in the best possible way. Searching around for small talk, she grasped on the farm.
“How’s the farm doing?” she asked, and she could hear how brittle and hoarse her voice sounded.
“Alright,” Big Mac said quietly, and went back to chewing his stalk of hay. Twilight searched around for another topic, trying to keep the conversation going and remembering that it never used to be this hard to find the right words with Macintosh.
“How’s Cheerilee?” she asked, and immediately regretted it. If Big Mac’s face was difficult to read a moment ago, now it was a mask.
“Alright, Ah hear. Ah’m not the pony to ask about it,” he said. Even though it was a long time ago, Twilight had spent a lot of time learning to read the tiny inflections in Macintosh’s voice, and if she was right that was news that it cost him to deliver.
“You two aren’t- I mean, you broke up?” Twilight asked, hating the faint hope for a positive answer she could feel inside herself. The stallion looked at her with something so much worse than anger or hurt- he pitied her, Twilight realised, and she couldn’t bear it.
“A year ago, Twilight,” he said softly. Closing her eyes for a second, Twilight reeled. Had it really been that long since she’d asked after him? Unwilling to think it over further, she turned her attention to the crate, business creeping into her tone, and Big Mac took the hint and stood a little straighter.
“Celestia sent you this to bring me? Why do you think she did that?” Twilight asked out loud, as she pulled the top off the crate with her magic. Inside, resting on straw packing, there were three clear bottles. Each contained a liquid in a different colour; the first was effervescent and clear, the second a thick, creamy strawberry pink, and the third was black as tar. Each bottle had a label on it with a number, and there were likewise three numbered scrolls nestled at the bottom of the crate.
“Can’t rightly say,” said the stallion. “But Ah’m supposed to make sure you do as the Princess wants. You’re to read that first letter now, and it’ll tell you when your first lesson is. When you’re done, you open the second letter, and when you’re done with your second lesson you open the third letter there. You follow?”
“Yes, absolutely. Lessons one at a time until I’m finished,” Twilight sighed. “Not that I’m likely to learn anything.”
Twilight realised one incongruity with the delivery, and looked up at Big Mac with confusion.
“Wait, why are you delivering this? You don’t do the mail, do you?”
Big Mac shook his head. He looked a little frustrated at Twilight, if she was any judge. She was starting to think that when it came to Big Mac, though, she wasn’t as good a judge of his moods as she’d used to be.
“Ditzy got married a spell ago, not that y’came to the wedding. She’s moved away. Ah’m taking on the job now,” Big Mac muttered. “Farm needs the money. Ain’t your concern.” The stallion nodded at Twilight and started to take his leave, ambling out of the door with that steady stride Twilight used to admire so much.
“Your first appointment’s soon, Twilight. Y’should open your letter,” he said as he left, letting his head slump a little as he left the library. Twilight watched him leave for a little, trying to ignore the hot tangle high in her chest. She shouldn’t feel this awkward around him, she thought to herself. He’d left her. She was entitled to ignore what was going on with his life, she decided, and shut out the nagging voice in the back of her head that reminded her that ignoring his life was what had caused their problems in the first place.
Magic was what was important to her, she reminded herself. She opened the first scroll and read it. It might even be fun to see what Celestia had planned for her, she thought to herself, but as she read the letter she realised that was a false hope.
Twilight Sparkle,
The first of your tutors is going to teach you about pegasus magic. Take the first elixir with you to the pond at the outskirts of ponyville and your tutor will meet you there at eleven a.m. The elixir will enable you to understand their magic more clearly, and is attuned to your tutor, who is the most powerful practitioner of pegasus magic in the realm.
Yours,
Princess Celestia
Holding the elixir up to the light, Twilight got a closer look at it- it seemed clear at first, but as soon as the sun cut through it it was refracted into a brilliant spectrum, bouncing little rainbows over the walls of the library that shimmered and shifted as the elixir bubbled. It was fairly clear, she thought, that this was attuned to Rainbow Dash. The most powerful practioner of pegasus magic in the realm? That was complete nonsense, Twilight thought to herself. Rainbow was fast, sure, but her power was all athletic, not magical. If Rainbow Dash had received a summons to this meeting with the same language, she’d be intolerable.
With a sigh, Twilight resigned herself to an afternoon of being lorded over by the brash pegasus, and she slipped the elixir into her saddlebags before setting off for the pond.
Woah... must find out what happened to everypony now, tracking for sure.
238712
Agreed.
My god, you're a productive bost'tet. And the quality has clearly not given way to quantity. Always an inspiration, always a great read.
I wonder if Twilight's symptom has a time limit. To make things more exciting. Running out of time, must take lessons.
I'd give this one a track.
Intriguing! A fading cutie mark is certainly an original concept. I especially liked the tantalizing clues about a previous relationship with Mac. Consider it tracked!
A dashing figure strides into a resteraunt, His Magnificence proclaimed to all. He's dressed impeccably, From his Gilded tuxedo to his Tower of Thirty-Two Tophats (crowned, ironically, by a bowler), From his Atomic pocketwatch to his Trio of Monocles. Truly Arkensaw Pinkerton (for it is indeed this Marvelous fellow we are speaking about) is a man of class, grace and poise. The same cannot be said for Lordlyhour who, when noting there was a new Arkensaw Pinkerton fic out Promptly Dropped his Mobile computing device, Hit himself in the face with it in the process and Wrote half of a Minific Involving a convoluted series of gags revolving around dressing up in drag(of which only the Descriptor of Arkensaw at the beggining of this post remains) to express his joy at said new Arkensaw Fic. Tracked and Thumb-upped before I read. I knew I was not Clicking in vain.
238886 How in blazes did you know about my Atomic pocketwatch?
Seriously, though, this made me giggle. Thanks for reading!
awesome.
238897 The answer to your query is a long and harrowing tale, recorded thusly for future generations!; I sometimes follow you about sneakily. I occasionally make Forts out of your impeccable trousers, I sneak off with shiney things whilst your back is turned and I have a nest in your Basement. Your butler charges me no rent. I'd pay, but he says my presence keeps the restless ghosts of the Hobo's buried in the mass grave quiet and that's payment enough.
This... This is so far, awesome. It'll be interesting to see how yu handle the reunions/ explore the whys of Twilight leave and all.
p.s. I'll laugh if her mentor is 5cootaloo
Too many shadows, whispering voices
Faces on posters, too many choices
If, when, why, what?
How much have you got?
Have you got it, do you get it, if so, how often?
And which do you choose, a hard or soft option?
I believe these song lyrics sum this up pretty nicely
The entire song: West End Girls
Hmmmmm.....given that her power is based on the magic of friendship, it seems to me that what Celestia is trying to get her to do is reconnect with those around her. Given that her preference is to sit in her library and ignore the world as it passes her by, Mystery Pegasus (????) has her work cut out for her.
239353 or him. Let's not be sexist, here (though it's kinda a foregone conclusion... Wich would make it even funnier if it's, like, Soarin.)
239548
It could indeed be Soarin'. Or, for that matter, Pound Cake......
238951 your comments on this fic have been the most entertaining ones iv read on this site so far
Losing one's cutie mark is a Bad Thing.
I'm curious if you will explore the 5 years in which Twilight and Mac both found their relationship, and then lost it.
Ack, and your first story was so heartwarming! This is a situation I could easily see happening to these characters, although I don't really like it. You tell a damn good story regardless, and I'm eager to see where you take this.
I hope this ends well for Twilight...
Woah... A 5 year jump in time?!
Well there went another bit of sanity.... O well, didn't need that bit anyways. Being crazier is a lot more fun. Now where is that muffin button?
.... Darn can't find it. I guess the thumb up button and track box will have to do.
Yeesh... The future sounds like its pretty bad from Twilights perspective, if the show does go on for five years, I hope it isn't like this
This is wonderful! By the second paragraph, I was already hooked.
My face when I saw this was a sequel to Fixing Up Miss Smartypants:
ragegenerator.com/images/ragebuilder-faces/Victorious/awww%20yeah.jpg
My face when I see that Twilight's relationship and social life have gone to hell:
files.sharenator.com/epic_rage_guy_Meme_Faces-s620x520-156978-580.jpg
? didn't fixing up miss smartypants end on a happy note?
240206 this this this!
Oh dear. This will be good. I hope there's a happy ending.
Awww, I hope everything works out for Twilight in the end. I'm assuming Mac's place as a major character will lead to that. It's sad to know that they're no longer together.
Easy track and Thumbs Up for me, I adored your first, so I shall read your second.
I see, she was consumed by her research
Whoa. What a bombshell. I had no idea Twilight would give up Big Red for studying. Makes me wonder what else happened. Tracked, and I will know more. I must. No excuses!
240237 It did end on a happy note! Fixing Up Miss Smartypants was a traditional comedy, where it is easy to see from fairly early on where everyone should be and then I tease you by making it look as though they won't end up in those places but then they do. Hurrah!
Because this is so much later than the first story, don't expect every relationship from Smartypants to go where you hoped it would. I'll admit some of this planning kind of broke my heart a little.
242104
I do hope that, at least, the aformentioned wedding was with the Doctor?
I fetl a lot of tension between these ponies up there.
Awk-waaaaard~
This looks really good!
-What? I didn't do anything!
Used the word neglect(ed/ing) 3 times in the span of 5 sentences. This word abuse is called 'overusing'. I don't want to sound negative, but it seriously needs editing out. Just swap with similar words.
The same problem with 'elixir'.
916513 Thanks for commenting! You're absolutely right about "neglect"; I'd overused that horribly, and thanks for pointing that out. I've edited it now thanks to your feedback. As far as "elixir" is concerned, that's a deliberate stylistic choice, not a mistake. Draught, potion, philter and brew all spring to mind as alternatives, but since we're viewing this through Twilight's eyes I decided that while those are all things that exist in the world of Equestria, Twilight knows the difference.
A draught is a magical healing drink of uncertain provenance. A brew is a drink made from natural ingredients with a quasi-magical effect. A potion is a drink made from magical ingredients with a magical effect (see the love potion the CMC make in hearts and hooves' day for an example). A philter is a drink made specifically for a single pony with a complex magical effect. An elixir is a drink made specifically from a single pony with a specific magical effect.
Now, I made up those exact definitions just now, but I always figured Twilight would know the difference, which is the important thing. This drink is an elixir, not a draught, a potion, a philter or a brew. Twilight wouldn't call it anything else.
While I appreciate your feedback, might I offer some of my own? Your comment was entirely pointing out two instances of overusing. Even if you didn't mean to sound negative, you kinda did, because you didn't mention a single positive thing about the piece. It made me feel very defensive to read, and I'm sure that's not what you want from your comments because you made a very constructive point. It's worth remembering that things like overusing are well past grammar 101- you've not corrected me on a point on which i was erroneous, but instead called my attention to two places where I hadn't used best practice. While that's great, and it's always nice to know someone cared enough to point it out, you need to alter your tone. There's a world of difference between "You forgot to capitalise this and it needs fixing" and "You overused this word and it needs fixing"- the first is pointing out a clear mistake which needs correcting, and the second is pointing out a matter of style that you think will improve the piece. It needs you to come at it with a little less authority, otherwise you'll often provoke a really defensive reaction.
Sorry for the wall of text- I just felt I should point this out, because my gut response to what you wrote was "well, you can go and sit on a fig, you big jerk" even though you had made an excellent point. There are far too few people giving good crit on fimfic- I'd hate to see yours ignored because you delivered it in such a brusque way.
918130
I completely understand both your explanation for elixir and you getting defensive. It was around 2-3 am and I'll admit I was a bit irked at how seemingly... off, the writing in this set of the series is from the first (I really enjoyed the FuSP chapters). I apologize for the almost accusatory like post, and know that it was so terse because all I could think of at that point was getting it out and then going to bed. I almost want to ask if you had taken a break from writing between the stories, because in the next two chapters, it rapidly felt more like the older story it was based off of. Either way, I am actually very much enjoying this so far. Twilight being the 'bad pony' (for lack of the ability to think of a better term for her at the moment) is a very refreshing and new experience. Also different. I love different.
Again, I'm sorry for the very pointed post, I was just very tired, and I kind of dropped into the super editor mode I use when going over the stories I edit for others (I use short comments in GDocs while editing). Anyways, good story, even if my head canon is railing against the most interesting way you are explaining world magics.
Also, Twilight makes best villain:
fc08.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2012/079/8/7/smile_insane_twilight_sparkle_by_grumbeerkopp-d4shxo0.png
918130 Maybe if you wrote, for example, "Holding the bottle/vial/et cetera up to the light . . ."? Or perhaps "mixture" would be general enough to not be wrong?
And I'm wondering what Twi's reason is for so neglecting all of her friends. She's supposed to have changed since her Canterlot days.