• Member Since 2nd Mar, 2013
  • offline last seen May 7th, 2023

Spiceywolf15


T

Princess Luna, Ruler of the night, is furious. For centuries since Celestia and her had taken the land from Discord they have ruled over Equestria bringing it both the night and the day. But Luna has been rejected by those she rules over. They shun the night she works so hard on, and ignore her as a ruler. It is time she reminded them the importance of her night.
((Author's note: Final chapter has been edited and is now a thousand times better. Rated teen for some mature language.))

Chapters (3)
Comments ( 31 )

She should make a big old magnifying glass and have that cross the suns path. Burn all them niggers, make them beg for the coolness of night. Luna shall have them clamoring at her feet.

Interesting take on it, I'll shall be watching this closely.

I like where I think this story is going. Here is some feedback though since you requested it. These were the only things that stood out to me.

1. Tartarus is capitalized much like Earth is when speaking of the planet.
2. Ponyville didn't exist 1,000 years ago. Celestia clearly established it while her sister was in the moon.
3. Hoofington should be capitalized assuming its a city name or even the name of a region.

this, is going to be good.

Comment posted by Spiceywolf15 deleted Aug 11th, 2013

3028252
Okay.... uhm... what did that have to do with anything that I said?

3028256 yeah I mis read it I thought you said Equestria wasn't established... I deleted the comment My bad... :twilightsheepish:

At first I thought it's just another story about Luna's downfall, but it seems it has an AU tag for a reason. Would love to see more, but please, capitalize those names just like Ebonysdagger pointed out!

I LIKE THEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I COMAND THEE TO MAKE ANOTHER OF THEE SPLENDED STORY!!:twilightsheepish::twilightsmile::twistnerd:

3036592 This comment. This made me happy all day. :twilightsmile:

That's it? Talk about horribly anticlimactic

3154587 true, where is the epilogue?

3154587
Yes I realized that today, I will probably come in and edit it when I get some inspiration. At the moment I just felt that I needed to finish it for those people who have been waiting for over a month...
I will do this when my schedule becomes less busy as I am currently back in school and I am in marching band. (Basically I have Sundays off IF my parents don't drag me somewhere)

sorry i dont spik inglisch XD woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooow bella story, iz biutifull nect story plis *^*

3276791 It was just approved! ^^ :pinkiehappy:

Luna sighed and looked down, then back out the window. Daisy was right, this would work to show the ponies of Equestria the necessity of her night. Not only that they would give her the respect she deserved. But was it worth this? Was it truly worth letting them come to harm?

You don't deserve anyone's respect if you have to force it. That's not respect, that's fear. What you deserve is to be deposed for abusing your position.

This ending feels... weird. Luna did apologise, but she also got exactly what she wanted by threatening and essentially bullying all her subjects, who are completely helpless and utterly dependant on her.

6243080
Even if it wasn't the nicest way it forced everyone to see how important the night was. I can't imagine a better way to make them appreciate it by making it disappear. Sometimes people don't appreciate what they have till it gone.

10832297
Sorry, but Luna here deserves no respect. She blackmails helpless people into worshipping her, all for the sake of her ego. She's a bully and a tyrant and she should get NO respect after this. In fact, what should happen is ponies looking to make night possible without cowing to the whims of such a petty person. Keep in mind, the thing she's taking away? They need it to LIVE. She's threatening their LIVES. She says she'll stop before anyone dies... but I don't trust her. Not after what she's doing. She's too petty.

Moreover, yes, she taught the ponies to respect the night... that does NOT mean SHE should be respected. That's pure hubris. She's already a princess, and yet, she acts like her life is unbearably hard. She lives in a castle, with guards and servants and meals provided to her and she has no real care in the world, all she really has to do is bring nighttime, and yet, she THINKS she's not getting enough out of the deal. Petty, privileged, arrogant, vain. Luna here is many things, but respectable is not one of them.

She needs to be deposed, and quick.

10832471
I doubt moving the moon as easy as you think it was. Considering if she wasn't an alicorn it would be incredibly difficult for her to do. Plus don't forget about her dream duty . And just because she a princess doesn't mean she got sit around doing nothing. Considering it used to take 5 unicorns to move the sun and moon and they used suffer burnout from the job which meant no more magic it was a big job. Plus everyone deserves to appreciate for their work once in a while. Celestia couldn't easily handle dream duty.

Celestia frowned at the brashness of her sister's question, "I only wished to come and speak with my little sister before I went to bed for the night." She yawned, "Which I must do... Goodnight my sister."

If only she did this canonically there would be no nightmare moon. Or at least not for this.

I was hoping for a different ending. Like if Celestia ended up raising the moon and either luna fought her for it or threw away her crown at not even being needed and left in self exile

6243049
It’s a two way street. On the one hand, you are correct. On the other hand, the ponies shouldn’t reap the benefits of her labor if they are ungrateful.

11371585
She's a princess. Living in a castle. Several castles, in fact. With hundreds, thousands of subjects, who will serve and obey her. If her life is so hard, give all of that back to the people and leave.

11112044
I was hoping Luna would go to the other side of the world and keep the moon there while taking the stars with her. Let the ponys of Equestria enjoy the night of no moon and stars

11371892 It looks like their Princess was in another castle.

11383829
That works too. Just something making Luna independent or less of a yes mare

11371892
I'd argue it's a transaction. They aren't slaves, they're paid and respected for their jobs, the builders were paid, everyone paid off(I would assume so anyways). Just lay them off, and all debts are settled. No one wants to be respectful to the night, cool. Luna stops doing her job & lays everyone off, as they don't need to do theirs. Let the castles fall into disrepair, who cares? Only support yourself at this point, no one will notice if it's so unnecessary. Not go, "Oh, here's the deeds to the castles for the hundreds of you servants to split, on top of your wages. Enjoy arguing over that."

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