"For fun" is the best reason to do anything. "The best" is the best way to do everything.
It seems some ponies find Fluttershy's carnivore pets distasteful. A day of care-taking quickly becomes an extended look at the Equestrian penal system when she is caught feeding animals to other animals.
An unabashedly silly story.
Rated "Teen" for repeated references to murder, but it's silly murder.
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How dare they do that to poor innocent Fluttershy
I was wondering if this was supposed to be a pot shot at the fics that have Fluttershy freak out about us eating meat, and conveniently ignoring that many of her animal friends are carnivores and omnivores.
What drugs wee you on when u wrote this? Because they must've been AWESOME to take to write something as silly and comedic as this XD
But Fluttershy didn't need to escape! She could've just signed up for that nice new program they're testing out!
Actually, the way she acts sometimes, you'd wonder if she already did...
Well you promised silly and delivered in spades, my friend. Would LOL again.
Favorited because Gilbert and Sullivan.
Hahahaha Great job mate keep it up. /)
Loved the Les Miserables reference with Prisoner 24601
Also, good story!
2896941
The fiends!
2896951
Well, it certainly started out that way, and many elements remain of that, but i'm clearly not the go-to writer for satire.
Needless to say, those people might be more silly than this story was.
2896984
Sober as the day I was born. Just imagine how crazy it would have been if I had been zonked!
2897050
Nauseating stories aside, I guarantee that Fluttershy learned her aversion to violence through the proper channels.
2897065
Thank you! Feel free to LOL by any time!
2897837
I very happy to have entertained you with my small story
Though using tunes by famous dudes is written off as vainglory
I find it fun, it's number one, to include such a parody
So on I go, the songs I know, I certainly am not sorry!
2898061
(\
Always!
2898951
Charmed to meet another Les Mis fan.
Fun fact, I had to make a choice between "Modern Major General" and "Look Down" to welcome Fluttershy to prison with. I figured MMG would be funnier.
2902901
You still proved your point though
Thank you! It dives me nuts to hear folks losing their minds over such rubbish. I can see her reacting badly to the idea of them eating sentient creatures like cows sure but fish and worms? Bull.
i.imgur.com/XXLbvIQ.gif
2902969
Thank you for saying so.
2906137
Some creatures, such as Owloysius and Angel, do seem to be sentient. Their intelligence is a big mess of sight gags and loose canon, truth be told. The fact remains that Fluttershy wouldn't bat an eye at a owl eating a mouse, much to Spike's disappointment.
I have to wonder, do people just close their eyes at the beginning of Dragonshy, or what?
2913596
Congratulations on being my first .gif-only comment. You will go down in the annals of history!
Points awarded for it being a funny one.
2917643
i.imgur.com/rgEkkrT.gif Didn't know how to react so I respond both .gif and text!
This was a very funny story, as much because of the concept as because of the narration. Thinking about it, Fluttershy probably has the highest body count of all the Mane Six.
I loved how Irate Trespasser wasn't even given a gender. Shows how much they matter in the scheme of things (especially to Angel). The 'yeah' policepony was funny as well. And so was 'the daily musical number.'
I liked these lines;
She dug her trowel into the earth and was rewarded by the sight of one of the most beautiful creatures in the world.
'That is, a giant mass of wriggling, writhing nightcrawlers,'
'Within an instant, there was nothing left of the worms but a memory and bad gas,'
'“Now remember,” Fluttershy explained, “we don’t want it to suffer.”
WHAM! WHAM! WHAM!'
'The family tore into the trout, happy squeaks of carnivore delight drifting along the breeze,'
'The bear tore into the bag with relish. And mustard,'
'The bear sat back, its diet of raspberries, strawberries, and cherries sated,'
'Fluttershy turned to find herself face-to-face with an irate, uninvited pony. The worst kind of pony. An irate trespasser was most certainly the worst kind of pony.
Not that Fluttershy would ever say so,'
'“Your coat is stained with the blood of a thousand innocent animals!”
Fluttershy blinked. “A-actually, this is raspberry juice—”'
'“black caldron emergencies,”'
'“Yes, my little critters,” the pony whimpered. “You are free to do whatever you wish…”'
'Three little fillies jumped up and clapped their hooves together. “Cutie Mark Crusader Prosecutors, YAY!”'
'The draconequus spun himself a tie out of spider silk. A thousand violated spiders trundled away whimpering,'
'“And naturally, my client denies everything,”'
'“Don’t worry, Miss Fluttershy,” Discord said as he fiddled with his tie. It had more knots in it then Big Mac’s back after applebucking season. “I’m sure she has a perfectly good reason to betray her dear friend,”
'Discord shrugged and sat back, sipping his glass of expectations. “Hmm, the aftertaste is always bitter…”'
'She slammed her hooves down before Applejack and shouted sweetly,'
'Applejack leaned back very, very far,'
'Her uneasy grin spoke to Sweetie Belle like an over-enthusiastic narrator,'
'Discord flopped to the ground like limp pastrami. “I’m sorry, Fluttershy. The evidence is overwhelming,”
'Silence filled the room until Applejack’s mumbled reply shoved it to the side,'
'Smith Judge Granny Honorable,'
'Discord stroked his beard. It purred happily,'
'“Guilty!” said the diamond dog.
“Guilty!” said the Everfree dragon.
“Guilty!” said Queen Chrysalis.
“There, now that’s a fair an’ unbiased jury if I ever did see one,”'
'Smith, the judge who is an honorable granny, replied,'
'Fluttershy nodded dumbly. As in silently, you meanies, not unintelligently,'
'she was examined from head-to-tail extensions,'
'Her sobs carried down the corridors, pushing their way into the hearts of her guards,'
'Widowmaker Puree sidled up beside the skinny pony, smiling like a madmare. The reason is obvious,'
'“Miss Fluttershy, do you know why you are here?”
“Um, because the natural order of the food chain is something to be hated and feared by all?” she asked hopefully,'
'“You are here because you are sick. You are sick and this is the hospital. You are sick, this is the hospital, and I am the surgeon.”
Warden Jellybear stood up and walked around Fluttershy, talking all the while. “You are sick, this is a hospital, I am the surgeon, and these guards are your nurses. You are sick, this is a hospital, I am the surgeon, these guards are your nurses, and those handcuffs are your wheelchair. You are sick, this is a hospital, I am the surgeon, these guards are your nurses, those handcuffs are your wheelchair…” He looked right in her eyes. “And there are no discharges,”'
'“No, I fed animals! And… I think I’d do it all over again.”
“Guards!” Jellybear shouted as he leaped backwards onto his desk. “Restrain the prisoner!”'
'“We should go, I don’t think our distraction is gonna last long.”
“Distraction?” Fluttershy asked.
“Cutie Mark Crusader Master Criminals, YAY!”'
'“If you can’t trust your friends to break you out of a maximum security prison, what can you trust them to do?”
“I suspect I’ll never find out,”'
'“Are you sure it’s not too much trouble?” Fluttershy asked for the fifty-eighth time that day.
“Yes,” Little Strongheart replied for the fifty-eighth time that day'
and
'“So let me get this straight…” The honorable Judge Granny Smith looked down her glasses at Discord. “My niece and her friends got into some kinda hoosegow brawl in Canterlot, an’ it wasn’t their fault they had loaded party cannons at the scene of the prison break?”
Discord nodded. “Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye!”
“Well, that’s a mighty big swear, Mister Cord.” Granny, the honorable Judge Smith, said. “Sounds legit. Soups up!”'
I found no typo.
2917643 *Grins* That or perhaps they join me in grinding my teeth at her giving the ferrets veggies in winter wrapup *twitch*
2918208
.gif and text? The comment has doubled!
2934605
Oh, gosh. Oh, gosh. That's a hilarious thought. Fluttershy, slayer of rainbow trout and master of earthworms! Terror of the herbivores! Queen of the food chain!
I'm glad you caught that! I was debating even giving it a name, but it was getting difficult to think up new non-descriptive descriptors.
I'll be honest, I still giggle at that line.
I did, and it's thanks to you!
Apple Bloom isn't Granny Smith's niece, she's her granddaughter! I messed up big time that time!
2952666
I may not recall correctly, but I seem to remember said ferrets looking at the vegetables and giving an expression like "What the heck am I supposed to do with this!?"
At least, that's how I interpreted the animation.
2972135
Bravo images.wikia.com/mlpfanart/images/e/e7/Luna_clapping.gif
2972135 That's how mine always reacted when some well meaning twit tries to feed them veggies.
2972659
Well-meaning Twits are the best kind! They're the ones you can pat on the head and say, "It's okay, you can try again next time!"
Though, if they thought a ferret was anything but a meat-eater, i'm not sure they have much hope for improvement...
Wow, that was a fun read! A lot of those jokes caught me off guard.
3027330
It's tagged Random for a reason. Most of these jokes surprised me as I was writing them, if you can believe it!
Glad to hear you enjoyed it!
Also, your username is one of my favorite Doctor Who quotes ponified. That is awesome.
3029412 Trust me the random tag don't do it justice. A more fitting tag would me "Apple" because it would hold far less/more meaning for this story than random ever could.
Thanks Doctor Who is my favorite show and I thought "Brilliant" and "Ponies" fit quite well together, don't you?
3029440
Aye, an' that'd be the Bobcat's Onion, it would.
I wouldn't be here if I didn't.
3029537
Exactly.
Derpy, the baliff? Well, Until proven otherwise, I'm gonna assume that crossed eyes or not, she's fairly competant.
Discord, is Fluttershy's attorney. Oh this is either gonna go splendidly, or horribly.
Oh god.
You're kidding me, WHAT KIND OF KANGAROO COURT IS THIS?!
*struggles to find something to say* I'm not sure if I should applaud you for using MMG, one of my favorite songs, be disgusted by the context, or hit you for doing something so appalling to the song. On the bright side, it works, every verse matches up perfectly.
Don't bother, the only one whose ever been able to resist the Stare is Discord.
This is obviously written post Season 4, due to how well Fluttershy is taking everything in stride.
Of course.
I'm suddenly worries.
Somehow, I'm not surprise.
2902901
Oh goddamnit Nappa.
5591240
Quite right. You do not get out of line when Derpy is on duty. It does not happen.
Truthfully, you should do all three, then kick me in the sweet spot for thinking it was funny.
5621804
That's probably the best idea.
That was suitably crazy. And the twist at the end? Bravo.
Best part had to be the Pirates inspired song in the middle, though!