Crimson Brush
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Very nice.
I normally don't like the "punishment" kind of thing but I very much enjoyed this.
Can't wait for more.
2799089
Thanks for the compliment. Wish I could say the next chapter is coming along well but I've hit a bit of a writer's block. Though the last chapter of "Many Uses of a Brush" should be out shortly.
For a first attempt this is... as close to perfect as i've ever seen. Your writing's good, I saw no obvious spelling or grammatical errors, nor any punctuation problems.
Liked and Faved, hope too see more soon
2910983
Glad you like it so far!
That's because I'm an obsessive perfectionist who sweats every single keystroke. Obviously, Twilight Sparkle and I share certain OCD tendencies.
Chapter 2 is in progress; I'm still juggling some ideas to keep the spanking scenes from getting repetitive or predictable, which is always a hazard in this kind of story.
(Though I imagine Trixie won't appreciate the results nearly as much as the readers will. 
)
I feel bad for the Apple Family. They're always put up as a family practicing corporal punishment... I wonder what would happen if one the younger Apples decided to hold a grudge about that.
3007978
Having grown up in a family VERY similar to AJ's I can say its pretty common. And I never intended them to be depicted as abusive. Simply traditional. They all know to accept the punishments given to them.
3008097
I guess it is a world quite alien to me...
3008156
It can be to alot of people. Corporal punishment is slowly becoming frowned upon. And coming from an ACTUAL abusive family... I'm suprised I still condone it.
But I don't simply condone it, I see its potential and purpose. When done with love and care, spanking isn't abusive, and it really does help.
I can understand the idea of the punishment for Trixie from AJ but the amount she put into it seems a bit far to me.
3008647
To a certain extent, I was looking at it like this: Earth-ponies are supposed to be the toughest and strongest of the three races, while unicorns are often assumed (at least in fanon) to be physically weaker. So when Applejack says she won't go any worse on Trixie than she would on her own sister, that still ends up being fairly harsh from a unicorn's point of view. 
Eh, you can blame me for that, I suppose.
Plus, Trixie unknowingly made it worse on herself by tightening and tensing up all the muscles in her thighs and hindquarters. That does make the impacts hurt a lot more.
Not to worry, though -- the next stage of Trixie's penance (with Rarity, which I'm working on now while CB pulls together the parts following that) won't be quite so excruciating an ordeal for the showmare.
3007978
Well, one of the constants which CB and I have tried to keep in the stories is that the recipient of the corporal punishment understands and acknowledges that they deserve it because of something that they did. Sometimes before the spanking, sometimes during it, but they always come to that point by wrestling with their own consciences -- and afterward, the person (or pony, in this case) giving the spanking makes sure to comfort the recipient and makes sure they not only know they're forgiven, but that they're still cared for and loved. The spankings are meant as a form of discipline for what they did, not because the pony giving the spankings wants to harm them.
Notice, in fact, that in chapter 7 of "Many Uses of a Brush", Crimson Brush makes a point of not punishing Silver Spoon when she's still angry with her -- and that in chapter 4, Rainbow Dash does let her anger get the better of her when spanking Scootaloo, and this is shown as a bad decision on Dash's part which she ultimately feels very guilty over even when Scoots forgives her for doing it.
Besides -- at the end of the day, it's just a work of fantasy involving cartoon ponies.
("Just repeat to yourself, it's just a show, I should really just relax...")
3009103
Well I hope that the whole story isn't just going to be Twilight's friends beating up her marefriend, whom she just explained wasn't near at full fault for what happened.
Also I mean yeah she humiliated Rarity with her hair but, she lost her home in the ursa situation. I think that should at least somewhat make up for it. Not to mention again. She was corrupted by the amulet.
also. MST3K reference for the win.
3013161
Don't worry about that too much. I don't want to give too much away, but they will all get something in return. And AJ as well as Rarity are reasonable enough to realize that Trixie wasn't completely at fault. But while the Ursa was not her fault in any way... at least in my opinion, The amulet is at least partly her own fault, and that is what she's repenting for.
If you don't like corporal punishment then I suggest you skip chapter 4, Rainbow's, though I haven't really begun on that one yet.
This is and always was meant to be a spanking/redemption fiction, not a clop fic.
3013161
Well, that's partly up to Crimson Brush, really. It's primarily his scenario and story; my role is mostly to take the draft that he gives me, then clean it up and flesh out the details.
Also, Trixie does acknowledge that even if the Amulet screwed with her head, it was still her own choice to put the Amulet on in the first place because she was blaming Twilight for her own mistakes and seeking revenge, instead of facing up to the fact that it was her own poor choices in life that brought her to where she was. (A lot more of that backstory is in 5 and 6 of "The Many Uses of a Brush".) It's kind of like drunk driving; the alcohol may have diminished your capacity, but it didn't pour itself down your throat; you still made the choice to drink it in the first place. (Not a perfect analogy, admittedly, but close.)
That being said, CB did give me a blank cheque, as it were, on writing chapter 3 (Rarity's part), as long as it ends with a particular event to lead into chapter 4. So, while Trixie is still going to be doing some penance, I do have a different direction in mind for what Rarity will do to her.
(In this continuity, at least, the harshest punishment Rarity's ever dealt out is warming Sweetie Belle's backside with a hairbrush, so it wouldn't be appropriate for her to roast Trixie's rump the way Applejack did anyway.) And I've also gone back and added a bit extra to the opening of chapter 3, to have Applejack sincerely apologizing to Trixie when she realizes that the punishment she gave was harsher than it needed to be because it didn't occur to her that a unicorn couldn't take the kind of whallopin' that an earth-pony can. 
Hopefully that'll take the curse off it a bit. 
3013311
Well I didn't really think it was going to be with how the second chapter played out. I wouldn't be surprised about Rainbow doling out punishment. I just hope she doesn't do it for the wrong reasons, I.E. Revenge instead of forgiveness/penance.
3013565
I actually have to thank you for you comments. I was honestly having a hard time getting the ... nerve I guess to right the RD chapter. But after reading your comments, I not only got the inspiration but decided to take it a completely different route.
3125377
No prob.
3125292
Bravo! That really had me cracking up.
Wow, this was just wow. I love Rarity playing a dominating role but this took it to a whole new level. You two have really perfected the use of clop as a story enhancer too, as hot as the action was it didn't detract at all from the overarching theme. Just made it better. Now I am both looking forward to and apprehensive about Rainbow Dash's chapter. This story has done such a fantastic job at keeping everypony in character that I can't help but feel the switching was the easiest punishment on Trixie's list. Really looking forward to more of this guys, and in the meantime I'm going to do whatever I can to get this fic more of the attention it deserves.
3178851
I've always kind of figured that out of all of the Mane Six, Rarity would be the most likely to have some really interesting kinkiness bubbling just under the surface of that oh-so-perfectly-proper exterior; she just seems the type that would be a dirty little mare behind closed doors. 
Ha! Thanks for that, I'm glad you're enjoying the ride so far.
As for using clop as a story enhancer -- thanks for that, as well.
To me, the best clop stories are the ones that have story, as well as clop; a sex scene is always better, I think, when there's an emotional investment in the characters' situations and we actually get to learn something interesting about them and their relationships. Otherwise, it's just a lot of repetitious descriptions of "insert tab A into slot B". 
Dash's chapter is coming along nicely; it's possible that it might be ready to go as soon as the coming weekend. We'll see.
In the meantime, I hope you'll check out our other story, "The Many Uses of a Brush", if you haven't already; a fair bit of the backstory behind Twilight and Trixie's new relationship is in chapters 5 and 6 ("Tracing Lines" and "Turnabout's Fireplay"), and Dash's chapter is going to reference back to chapter 4 ("Chicken Butt") a little. (You don't necessarily have to read them to know what's going on, but they do help fill in the background.)
despite the fact that most of the story is clop it still comes accross as plot with clop(and plot the other kind)
i love it
fav, thumb up and follow.
...well, that was...wow.
YOU HAVE A NEW FOLLOWER.
I'm so very happy with how you ended that. Especially Rarity. The rest stuck with spanking. Rarity essentially sexually violated Trixie under the guise of punishment. I'm extremely glad to see that it didn't go undealt with.
awww i wanted to see princess celestia get spanked by trixie.
Author, if you dont mind, a little explanation of the very end there? Why were the 3 being punished? And why did Trixy think it was for her? All of the punishment Trixy received from them was requested I thought.
3415582
If you recall the entire incident was instigated by those three. Trixie wouldn't have retaliated with her boasting and revenge if they hadn't heckled her at her performance.
While Trixie was still in the wrong for not taking the high ground in the situation they still had a hoof in it. And Twilight is making sure everyone is forgiven and reaches peace for the incident. They all accepted it ((Of screen)).
so wait...
"One day, I’ll explain my actions to you, Trixie. The actions that led to your hatred towards me, and the reasons for them. One day... when Twilight fulfills her destiny... you’ll know the part you played – and the mistakes I made. And perhaps, when that day comes, I shall be the one needing to beg for penance and forgiveness..."
Does this meant here will be more to this? Or is that just a mystery?
3415896
This was meant as a wink to those who believe ((Myself included)) that Celestia knew exactly who the elements were and set everything up before hand. It was confirmed that Trixie went to Celestia's school, and her control is very impressive for a unicorn, so I had a bit of a head cannon that perhaps Celestia thought Trixie was the element of magic before Twilight's "Test" incident.
Celestia was referencing Twilight coming Ascension to Alicornhood, and felt bad for having given less attention to Trixie simply because she had found a better candidate. She can't tell Trixie yet, because if Twilight found out it might change the future. When Twilight ascends she plans on telling them both and accepting her just consequences.
But all that said I have no real intention to write that all out at this point in time. So I left it on a cliffhanger of sorts for others to give it their own meanings and ideas.
3013335
>Also, Trixie does acknowledge that even if the Amulet screwed with her head, it was still her own choice to put the Amulet on in the first place because she was blaming Twilight for her own mistakes and seeking revenge, instead of facing up to the fact that it was her own poor choices in life that brought her to where she was.
Eh...
This is why im uncomfortable with this sort of thing. For a start, its never stated that revenge was anything but the amulet.
Lets get this straight. Trixie isnt a nice pony. Shes actually got quite a lot of pretty bad traits (megalomania is one of them). but at the same time, shes also pretty blameless in the grand scheme of things. The Ursa destroys her house, but it destroys her house because of a minor lie she told, not because she was being mean or jerky. And frankly, Rarity tells way way worse lies than Trixie ever did and gets away with it - because they still arent an issue. Trixie's life choices never led to the Ursa destroying her house. It was basically a freak accident that happened to a less than nice pony - which is supposed to make it okay.
Secondly, on the amulet. We dont know any motivation, but considering Trixie literally never meets Twilight again until shes powermad, it seems very unlikely she got the amulet with the intention of hurting Twilight. She may have resented Twi for being the catalyst that destroyed her life, but the full on hatred seems unlikely - and frankly, if you were in that position, woudlnt you feel indescribably bitter? It seems far more likely that, given her entire show thing was ruined and people were constantly mocking and humiliating her, that she just chose the amulet because she wanted simple power.
To be psychological about this, Trixie has a personality based on Narcissistic personality Disorder in a similar way to Twilights being based on an Obsessive one. To really simplify this down, people with that disorder feel they have something fundamentally wrong about them. They have simultaneously high and low opinions of themselves. They may just flat out hate themselves, for literally no reason at all that they can think of. They may believe that they have to do everything perfectly (perfectionism is a classic trait - and i mean, they would practice pointless things in front of the mirror constantly to ensure they are done right), and anything left than perfection sends them into a self-hatred spiral (they often are very hard working because of this, but fall into deep depressions when something bad happens out of their control that they blame on themselves). So they constantly work, and especially seek to impress, awe and basically promote themselves above others to solve this problem. They see success in the real world as validation that they are worth something. Success = perfection. Perfection means they cannot hate themselves.
...So Trixie after boast busters would be seeking literally any success she could get. And success for Trixie = magic power. The amulet seems like something shed seize upon just because it was there. And only then does the idea of attacking Twilight come into her mind. Sure, its technically under her control, but it also clearly makes her irrational, violent and hyperaggressive (and she was already 2/3rds of those to some degree).
Im over analysing this, i know. Trixie isnt even my favourite character. Shes just one i feel has gotten the most screwed over by the show. To give it a TL;DR - i think Trixie is a fairly bad pony, but entirely innocent of any actualy wrongdoing. Her 'crime' is being grumpy, mean, mildly sadistic etc. but her punishment is simple: she has no friends. And seems fine with that.
Giving her constant punishment seems a) unfair, considering fate seems to be almost conspiring against her and her entire life is literally ruined and b) cruel, since all its doing is reinforcing her own psychological fuck-uppery.
It seems like shes apologising, again and again. But it makes me feel incredibly uncomfortable, because its a hard stretch to say anything shes done even deserves an apology, let alone a full on beating. it makes Applejack at least seem... less than sane. Perhaps if it was just Triixe doing what she needed to get them to the point where they are okay with her, id be okay with it. but the fact she seems to earnestly believe shes done something horrific to deserve self-flagellation just makes me feel kind of queasy.
3547206
Whew that was a long one, took me a bit to read through. Sadly I'm not as um... well thought out to do the same but I did feel it deserved a reply ^^.
On the note of the Ursa, I believe I made the point that the Ursa was in NO way her fault. Her fault was in the retaliation to the heckling she received. While the heckling was completely in the wrong she went too far in retaliating against them, especially in Rainbow's case (That could have very well done serious harm to her).
If you watch Magic Duel they give plenty of information on why she got the amulet. For one she had to EARN that outragious amount of bits by working on the rock farm. Thats not something you do just to stroke your own ego. If the writer's intent was to make the entire revenge plot on the side of the amulet she would probably have said something when she finally obtained it. Perhaps... "Finally The Great and Powerful Trixie has the power she deserves!". Something like that. Though that all postulating on my part since the writers probably never thought that far.
While I agree wholeheartedly that her punishment far outweighed her crime, I did have my reasons for it. First and foremost being, its a story and I wanted certain things from it. But outside of the corporate reasons lol. She agreed to whatever it would take to be with Twilight. It shows her true devotion to her, she simply had the bad luck of having to face the ire of the 3 most vindictive of the main 6 (Especially Rainbow). Applejack is stubborn and grew up in a very strict family, with even stricter values, so the punishment makes sense (Barring the fact she didn't realize that the earth ponies are inherently stronger). Rarity is almost 100% an alternate life of Trixie. Same personality and desires, though different outlets. The difference is Rarity was accepted, and Trixie was scorned. It shows a great contrast to how the world works given opposite reactions.
Rainbow Dash... I doubt I really need to explain her. Luckily I was a bit inspired by my previous story to give her a change of heart. When I first started writing chapter 1 I had full intention of her punishment being abusive, given the show's personality for her. But I loved her too much to really let that stand, she is my second favorite character after all.
Everyone's welcome to their interpretations and opinions, both of the show and my story, and I really appreciate that you enjoyed the story enough to write such a passionate comment.
This fic is a beautiful masterpiece. to be honest, i'm going to go and reread this when i finish writing this comment. I loved ever paragraph as I read, you did an amazing job of capturing every scene of discipline, and saucyness that i felt as though i was part of the story itself.
I give you the best thing I can right now. As many derpy's as I can. Enjoy my friend.
you definatly should of posted another chapter with what was going on down there... but you could at least do one-shot finishing it. I want more of your writing lol.
this made me sooo suprised lol
3917017
I think Triskelion would've agreed with that though, but I'll be honest by the time I finished the final chapter all my writing inspiration was gone.
I've even started a new story but I just can't get inspired to write it. So for now this is it. Really happy for the support though ^^.
3917051 Aww well you should find some inspiration. It seems like ti would be a rather ineresting chapter
3919459
Twilight doesn't have wings and as much as we all want it Twixie will never be canon.
3917063
I thought about expanding on that last part some more while I was massaging what CB sent me into shape (which is basically how we wrote this, for the most part; he wrote the basic chapter structure that had the events he wanted in them, then I fleshed it out while fixing up spelling, continuity, etc.), but I wasn't entirely sure where to go with it, since it was kind of starting to feel (to me, anyway) that the concept had pretty much run its course by that point.
There's an old show-biz adage: "Always leave 'em wanting more."
3919459
I suspect CB made it "alternate" because Twilight's not an alicorn, even though enough time has passed between "Magic Duel" and the start of this story that "Magical Mystery Cure" should have happened by now.
It's a bit clearer if you read The Many Uses of a Brush, which this story branched off from; Crimson Brush opens her shop in Ponyville sometime after "Wonderbolts Academy", at the very least, since the pendant Rainbow Dash got there is referenced in the chapter with her and Scootaloo, and Trixie returns to Ponyville several weeks after that.
(A little saucy? It's tagged "Mature", "Sex"; what did you expect, deep philosophical ponderings on the nature of existence?
)
3920938
bwhahahahahahaha
I... Personally I hate rarity now and if i was Trixie I would NOT deal with this.... Not that it isn't a good story, I'm just saying. I mean.... Come on.....
That part with Celestia and Cadance was a bit on the overkill side. Still it did not make this story any less good or entertaining! Very nice work!
... The underlying notion was expressly unpleasant.
Consequences are not some kind of retribution. Consequences are KNOWLEDGE. The experience of WHAT happens when you do something. Bad, good, it`s irrelevant. To think that spanking, of all things, is the absolution? Way to put carriage ahead of horse.
No matter how severe or trivial, punishment is not a consequence, in direct sense of the word. It did NOT came from the action, it was a reaction of others against the action. It is a retribution, a deterrent.
I suppose I can simply allow the notion that being spanked is an arousing concept for some people. Peer review amply suggests that much. However, the notion of punishment fetish? It`s something I will never be able or willing to comprehend.
5294103
*smiles* I appreciate your comment, despite its criticisms. The spanking in this story is not necessarily meant as Punishment or Retribution, but merely a means for both parties to come to a resolution of past grievances. Trixie accepts that she has wronged them, and wishes for their forgiveness. Their decision of spanking, or whatever Rarity did
is merely a means of putting the past behind them in such a way that it should never be brought up again. Trixie's decision of acceptance for such harsh actions, was simply a way of showing just how much she is willing to change, to move away from her actions in the past, and move on to be a pony others can trust and accept as a close friend.
At least that was my intention. I would never use spanking as a "punishment", for me its always a bonding experience. Of course this doesn't work for all children or partners. But if a child/partner accepts they did something wrong, but feels that forgiveness is not as simple as "I'm Sorry" and "I forgive you" it can help to bridge that gap and bring the two people closer than ever before.
Everyone is different though, and I won't ever say my way is right, or another's is wrong, barring the obvious exceptions. I do appreciate your taking the time to voice your views even if they do differ from my own. ^^
5295629
Well, that`s just it. I don`t believe in such token gestures. The values must match. I`d accept the monetary value, or an effort value, but dignity value? Forget it. No one is worth that much to me.
5294103 The underlying notion is something we've lost and need to restore to return our civilization to greatness. (i.e. Actions have consequences. Evil deeds must be atoned for before forgiveness can be granted. Maybe that sounds harsh, but nothing worth having is easy.)
6396105
Atonement, is that it? So who sets the golden standard, as it were? Who decides what should be atoned for and how?
No, this is bullshit. Atonement as a notion has any sense only on a subjective scale - it`s something you do to regain good standing with someone (yes, including yourself) if you`ve previously soured that relationship, be it by mistake or by intent. Most usually, it revolves around undoing or correcting something you`ve done to displease the someone in question to begin with.
When you try to speak of it as of some universal concept... Well, at best you sound like sanctimonious moralizing ass. At worst... At worst, you actually believe in this tripe, and at this point rational people start to plot how to get rid of you for good, lest you one day decide that "global justice" requires their "atonement" for "sins" they would not recognize.
6396959
I sense a bit of aggression, and I don't mean that in a condescending way. I never intended to anger or upset anyone with this story. It was inspired entirely on a whim. To be honest I hold Trixie to have only moderate fault in the events of Magic Duel and No fault in Boast Busters ((Part of her act is being boastful, a lot of magicians do it... I was actually upset at the reactions she got in that episode, and NO ONE can blame the ursa on her.)) So in terms of Atonement or Punishment I hold this story very out of cannon.
On that note though, Punishment was NEVER my intent, but it is in our nature to want to punish, or find justice, thus Applejack, Rarity, and RD's reactions. This story was more meant to be about Trixie seeking atonement and forgiveness. ((Yes I know the discipline is extreme, that's more for the reader than for Trixie.))
You asked who sets the 'bar' for atonement. Only two people can name/set that bar. The victim and the perpetrator. This can often be hard between adults, given that the victim may be cruel or compassionate and the perp may be aloof or self loathing, or simply drowning in guilt. The Victim may think a slap on the wrist is enough, while the perp may feel the need to severe torturous punishment. It could also be in the reverse. And while there is no 'right' answer the compromise is the most important part. When they can both agree that it is 'enough' then the problem can be forgiven and resolved and put in the past. Rarity's punishment may seem outlandishly harsh, but since Trixie is accepting of it, then in their eyes it is not.
Granted this was my intent, and does not mean that is how it is seen or read. And I apologize if I offended anyone with its message or tone. In my opinion the difference between abuse and discipline lies not with the victim but with the person who committed the act. And yes I understand for crimes this can't possibly be implemented in any realistic sense, but for slights against another, it is appropriate. Spanking someone because you were offended by something they did, when no offense was intended, is abuse. Spanking someone because they truly need to relieve the guilt they feel and reach a resolution between you both so that you can move on, is discipline. And though I use spanking in this example due to the nature of the story this really goes for any form of punishment.
I hope my words can be understood... I know I'm not the best speaker, but I wanted to put my heart on this matter out there. I thank you for your time and dedication to something you seem very passionate about, and I hope I did not offend.
6397060
Those three, of all the Ponyville, have the least justification for wanting punishment upon Trixie. What are their reasons? That they rose to the challenge and were shown up? INSUFFICIENT.
And also, very much wrong about who sets the bar. Haven`t you noticed something? It`s entirely too easy to swap the labels around. Victim is perpetrator, and perpetrator is victim. In truth, NEITHER of them is qualified to set any kind of standard. Anyone, but those two would be better, safer and far, far more just.
There is a good reason why the concept of judge exists. Someone uninvolved, who can take a look at both sides equally critically, and tell both of them what are the acceptable compromises and limits.
6397310
I believe I already stated this story is not meant to be Canon, and the punishments are more for the reader than Trixie. I agree that those three are the true culprits in this situation, thus them getting their punishment at the end. And an arbitrator can be just as unjust as the victim. Just look at America's jail system with a ridiculous case of wrongful incarceration. As well as the completely disproportionate punishments. 50 years for smoking pot and 15 for raping a child? But I've already said that compromise is unrealistic for the Judicial system. If a victim and perpetrator can come to a compromise and come to terms with whatever wrong came between them, then is that not fair and just?
6397382
Fair and just, you say? Not even remotely. In case you have had forgotten, it`s not impossible to force, coerce or deceive into agreement. So how exactly do you tell if your involved parties came to compromise, or one made a decision and made an effort to, ahem.... discourage other from voicing dissent?
What displeases me the most is that you don`t seem to have any idea what is that you`re advocating. So allow me to cue you in. Most abusive relationships work exactly in that sort of "compromise". Abuser insists that their abuse is just and fair, and abusee comes to believe this. But on the surface, all is fine - compromise is reached, everyone is "fine" with situation.
I don`t need to point out that this is utterly disgusting, and any self-respecting person should shun this "simple" way of thought.