You would not believe the day I've had, so I'm going to try to write it about it as calmly as I can: I FOUND AN ACTUAL HUMAN!!! Did I just yell that out loud? Never mind, his name (as far as I can tell) is "Pyro", and it suits him well since he set fire to a large chunk of Everfree after he fell from the sky. That's right, he literally FELL from the sky and crashed into the forest, where he saved me from a pack of Timber Wolves! I couldn't just leave him there, he had risked his life for somepony he'd never seen before, the least I could do was bring him back here to rest up…and if he was hauling that bag around with him, I don't blame him!
That thing's size is entirely misleading! It weighs more than that heavy-duty cart the Apple family uses for cider season, but it sure as sugar can hold a lot more.
Alright, I maybe went through that strange saddle bag he had with him (what? I was curious! Is that so wrong?), that's how I found his name, it was stitched on the flap next to a logo for something called "Mann Co." with a segmented orange circle next to it. Mental note; ask him what a "Mann Co." is when he comes to, among the other questions I have for him…heh. Anyway, this bag must have some sort of infinitely expanding spell on it because there were HUNDREDS of bizarre contraptions, some larger than I am, from this bottomless pack!
I couldn't begin to tell you what half of these do, but…I found it odd that he had a mailbox, two plush versions of himself, and dear Celestia; so many hats!
OH! I think he's waking up! Gotta go!
Princess Luna loved autumn nights. Sure, they weren't as clear as the ones in summer, or even spring, but the moon was just so dazzling and the thin layer of clouds only magnified it's glow. With Nightmare Night (a holiday that Luna had come to enjoy above all else) only a few days away, she MAY have pulled the moon closer so it'd be bigger and brighter. Not so close that it would cause any tidal disruptions, and the only ponies who could prove that it had moved closer were the astronomers, and they were on her payroll.
Canterlot Castle had the best view in all of Equestria, the pearly white palace was like a diamond in rough resting on the face of one the oldest and tallest mountains in known existence. The golden trim that detailed the castle reflected all of the light that touched it back with a warm glow, making the fortress even more of a beacon in the night. It was truly breath-taking, and only being allowed entrance into the surrounding city could one see all of the jewels encrusted along it's trim and the splendor that was the expertly crafted stain glass windows that solely dominated some of the massive walls. Luna thought it was beautiful too, but nothing could compare to her star-studded sky.
Her stardust mane billowed around her, it looked almost exactly like her precious night sky, just with different constellations (they tended to change whenever she styled her mane). She brushed it over her shoulder and gazed back up at the atmosphere to watch the Royal Weather Sentinels rearrange the foggy mists so they gently coiled around the great astral sphere. Everything was perfect…except for that rather unpleasing event that occurred in Ponyville the other night.
Normally the pegasi didn't even bother reporting weather anomalies unless it was absolutely critical and required immediate attention, or if something goes haywire, like a massive energy ball forming over the Everfree Forest. The navy blue Night Princess sighed. She didn't want some estranged demi-sun ruining her best night ever. She hadn't practiced her scare tactics all year for something like this to stop her now. And they were good too! She had managed to get one of the guards to actually FAINT when she first tested a few of her pranks.
But it wasn't the ball that worried her, it's what the investigation had uncovered.
According to a few eye-witness reports, the phantasmal orb had conjured itself over the old schoolhouse, launched something in the direction of the forest, and then disappearing as mysteriously as it had arrived. When the Royal Inspection and Containment Squad hit the scene, they found: a few broken trees, some broken branches, an angry cockatrice with a burnt tail was sent off to be treated (which later resulted in the vets being sent off to the hospital for being turned to stone), and, oh…a pack of Timber Wolfs that were reduced to kindling wood.
Luna rubbed her temples. Normally, she would have just waved it off as nothing more than splash damage from the lightning storm that day causing frightened ponies to see what wasn't really there. But she couldn't ignore the minuet details in the pictures that the police had overlooked; the Timber Wolfs were too spread out for one or even two stray thunderbolts to cause that much damage to such fierce creatures, tracks uncommon to anything in Everfree were found where the wolfs had fallen, and something had been dragged away from the scene but the rain had destroyed the trail.
Her mind raced as she tried to piece it all together. She was so wrapped up in thought that she didn't notice the door to the balcony open and close. She finally perked up when she heard the clink of gold on marble tile draw closer.
"Oh my, I see you pulled the moon closer for your big night," said Princess Celestia as she admired her little sister's majestic creation. Luna's teal eyes looked up at the pure white alicorn; she was noticeably taller than Luna (partially because she was older, and partly because she wasn't the one who was blasted by the Elements of Harmony, TWICE) and her multi-colored mane was also billowing in a nonexistent wind that seemed to originate from her own celestial body, the sun. The monarch sat next to her sister and looked up at the twinkling celestial bodies. "You look troubled Luna. Care to share what's on your mind?" She nuzzled her sister a little to try and comfort her.
"Oh Tia, I've just been so caught up with planning Nightmare Night, I don't want this anomaly in Ponyville to ruin everything…" said the dark alicorn as she continued her staring contest with the moon's crater-riddled surface.
"I must say, Luna," she wrapped one of her elegant wings around her troubled sibling "your speech has really improved." Luna gave her a small smile, although she would never admit it, her sister's feathers were the softest things she'd ever felt, and since she was the sun goddess, she was also incredibly warm.
"Really? Thank you, I've been training with that tutor you hired for me. This year will go MUCH smoother than last time."
"Think nothing of it, it is somewhat my fault that you went down to Ponyville the first time without being informed of the change in speech." They both shared a laugh that Luna so desperately needed. Celestia's face became more concerned, she pulled her sister a little closer. "Are you worried about the report that came back from the investigators?"
"It's what didn't show up that worries me…it's just like last time, when Silas-" Luna suddenly felt the heavenly down ruffle on her shoulder before it pulled her even closer to the larger alicorn. She could fell Celestia's heartbeat quicken. They sat in absolute silence save the quiet murmur of the city below and the eventide breeze singing to the mountains. Finally, after what seemed like an hour, Celestia spoke.
"No, it won't be like that. Never again. You and I defeated that warlock together…my only regret is that I couldn't prevent what happened to you." Luna was surprised; she had almost NEVER seen Celestia cry other than the time Luna was released from the vice grip of Nightmare Moon. She repositioned herself under the white wing, it was time to return the favor. She lifted her dark blue wing and wrapped it as best as she could around the sun goddess' much larger form. Celestia's tear-stained cheek rubbed against it as they both looked out at the direction of Ponyville. They couldn't see the small town, due to the cloud cover and the sheer distance between the small community and the Royal City, but they knew right where their friends were.
That's when Luna felt a sharp pain gouge its way into her horn and down into her forehead. She winced and retracted her wing, struggling under the sudden torment. Celestia stood, alarmed by her sister's writhing.
"Luna…Luna what's wrong? Luna, say something. Medic!" At once, a bright blue spark crackled to life in front of her and reviled Over-Dose; a blue unicorn wearing a white medical coat and thin rim glasses, with a clean-cut black mane and a blue medical cross for a Cutie Mark. He stood at attention.
"Ja! Vhat can I do for you, meine prinzessin?"
"Something's wrong with Luna. She just started holding her head and-" She was cut short as Luna's teal eyes grew brighter and brighter until they began to glow. Her horn also started to glow and burn, discharging all manner of sparks and flashes of light. Celestia and Over-Dose jumped back, they weren't exactly sure what was happening to the lunar deity but it was affecting the sky and the…moon.
Celestia's horn began to tingle in presence of a terrible power, one that she hadn't felt in a very long time, even by her eternal standards. The magic itself was enough to identify him but the evil, shadowy smile that crept across the otherwise pure white moon confirmed what Celestia's horn was already telling her: the first human to ever set foot in Equestria was about to make a come back…by using Luna as a warping point. Luna levitated into the air still continuing to writhe in pain at the unknown force assaulting her body. She twisted and cringed before falling back towards the ground, where Celestia waited with open wings to catch her.
"Luna, speak to me! Say something!" Shouted Celestia. No response, Luna couldn't hear anything beyond the pain of her horn trying to rip itself from her forehead. The trembling alicorn curled up in her sister's forelegs, shaking uncontrollably. The evil grin on the moon swiveled down to incorporate two oval eyes that cast their gaze down on all of Equestria. The silhouette mouth opened.
"NIGHTMARE MOON, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?" The chilling voice echoed inside Celestia's mind. Over-Dose quickly fainted. Encounters with the super-natural tended to have that effect on ponies that weren't used to it. Luna flew into the air once more, purple smoke billowed out of her horn and quickly engulfed the entirety of the once beautiful balcony. Celestia couldn't see anything through the dense haze, she tried to locate Luna but kept bumping into the railing and at one point almost tripping on the doctor. She finally felt something brush up against her back leg and, thinking it to be her sibling, turned to embrace her.
How wrong she was. She jumped into the air and suspended herself with her beautiful wings. The thing that had grazed her wasn't a navy blue alicorn with a malfunctioning horn, but a hand encased in a large black glove reaching out of a portal trying frantically to grab hold of her almost intangible tail. She looked on as the portal grew wider, the mouth of the entrance was now twice what it had been. A second hand shot out and aided it's twin in hauling up the main body. Celestia knew it was now or never.
She dispelled the smog with her mane, which flared up and pushed the gas away from her and her sister, next, she used her horn as means to redirect the energy feeding the swirling vortex and launched it into a far off cumulus cloud. The grim appendages, defeated, quickly retracted back from whence they came as the portal closed and the last of the energy tore violently through the sky into the now pitch-black cloud.
Celestia, who knew from experience that an encounter with a monster of such magnitude would not be defeated so easily, watched as the cumulus discharged it's stockpile of corruption onto the surrounding countryside and away from any settlement. She wrapped Luna in her magic and gently lowered her from her perch in the middle of the air.
Luna's horn was no longer casting unwanted magic but it was now hot to the touch as Celestia quickly found and burned her wing. The awful smell of burnt feathers woke Luna from her fever sleep.
"Tia…I-I'm so sorry…I couldn't…I…" Her breathing was shallow and she slipped in and out of consciousness. Celestia's eyes began to well up with tears, it was a horrible sight to see her only sister in such agony. That's when she heard hoofsteps approaching from behind her. Over-Dose trotted over to the rulers of Equetria and bowed as low as his body and the marble floor would allow.
"I am so sorry, I must've passed out. I'll just-"
"No," said Celestia relieved that he too was unharmed "you're not fired. That was not something anypony should have to experience, so you are forgiven. Just help her, please."
"At vonce!" He cast a spell around Luna, who was still being held tightly by Celestia. The blue aura calmed her down immensely and allowed her to drift off to sleep while also informing the doctor telekinetically of what was wrong. He mumbled to himself in his native tongue as he found where to focus he magical healing abilities for maximum results.
Celestia wasn't paying attention. She was still scanning the distance for signs of the infiltrator, and to her dismay, she could clearly see a purple glow flicker and die about half way up one of the surrounding mountains. Well, at least he was far away from the larger cities and settlements. But she knew all too well that round two would arrive at the moment of his choosing, and if he was still as predicable as before, he'd resurface on Nightmare Night.
She couldn't let the summoning of an ancient evil cause panic across Equestria, it would just make tracking him down even harder. She looked up at Over-Dose, the blue medic still doing his best to calm the weary moon herald.
"Doctor, (and I hate to be so formal with you) I hereby order you to remain silent about what has transpired here this evening under the threat of banishment. Is that understood?" He looked up and once again stood at attention. Growing up where he did, superiors giving orders followed by very real threats was commonplace, so the ruler of all of existence ordering him to shut up about something he barely saw least he be hurled into the sun seemed only natural. This also made him think that maybe he should get therapy. Again. For real this time.
"Do not vorry, prinzessin, mein lips are sealed." He saluted before returning to Luna.
"Thank you…" Celestia's voice grew quiet. Although she seemed fine now, Celestia could have sworn she saw Nightmare Moon in the fog while Luna was floating in the air. It was probably nothing.
Lyra wasn't the type of pony to panic, but this almost got her to break. After hauling the Pyro and his ridiculously heavy pack ALL the way back from the forest, she set him up in her guest room. She thought that he might be more comfortable without all of the clunky gear attached to him. After an hour of fiddling with buckles, straps, and various other contraptions that refused to relinquish their captive; she had only managed to free him of the glass helmet, the rocket pack, and the vice grip he had somehow gotten on his Phlogistinator while still being unconscious. The red bodysuit and filtrated mask had refused to budge, nor did his gloves or boots. This lead her to believe that maybe that WAS his skin. She had placed what she had gotten off of him on the bench next to him so he wouldn't panic when he awoke to find that he was no longer wearing them.
She had gone about her business that day as if though nothing had happened, which was really hard due to everypony having what felt like a collective panic attack. Guards and reporters from Canterlot had overrun the small town in the course of a few hours. The local venders and inn keepers where happy about the sudden influx, but everypony else was in an uproar, even more so than when Zecora had come to town. Lyra, who had been seen near Everfree at the time of the happenstance, was getting swarmed by reporters from Equestria Daily and the Manehattan Times and various other newspapers.
Lyra had also let curiosity get the better of her and had rummaged through Pyro's (what she now called) "backpack". It had all manner of strange devices within it's seemly endless confines; she found four more flamethrowers (one of which looked just like a double of another one but with festive Hearts Warming Eve lights on it), a vast array of melee instruments, and a couple of strange looking cylinders; two of them were shorter and painted bright red, while the other two were quite longer and had pistons of some sort under the barrels.
Then there were the hats. Dear sweet Celestia so many hats. Some of these she would have never guessed were headgear had it not been for the tags on them that said things like "Level 27 Hat" or "Level 0 Hat". Did that make them more important? Lyra had given up on trying to solve mysteries that the Pyro himself probably had figuring all this out when he first received/bought/stole them.
She had gone downstairs to unwind and write in her diary when she heard movement followed by muffled grunts and exclamations. She hurried back up the staircase to the Pyro's room, only to find that he was nowhere to be found. That wasn't what almost gave Lyra a panic attack, this next series of unfortunate events are what made her heart race and sweat pour down her face: she walked into the room to see if he was hiding when the door closed behind her. She quickly turned to see a fearful looking axe hovering less than an inch from her neck. Without moving her head, she gazed upon the fiery implement; that was the "Sharpened Volcano Fragment" if she remembered the description tag well enough.
Lyra could feel the heat coming from what she was fairly sure was actual lava traveling like veins across the axe's charcoal surface and made up the entirety of the actual blade. It was the only light source in the room save the moonlight and it cast an eery glow on the Pyro's features while showcasing the expression of terror on Lyra's face. He cocked his head sideways, he looked her over for the first time since she had found him the forest.
She had a mint green fur coat that matched her slightly lighter mane minus the white highlights. She had…REALLY big yellow eyes. Like super big for a head that size. He also noticed what appeared to be matching tattoos of a lyre on either side of her flank, upon further inspection, he noticed that the tattoos were actually part of her fur coat. He also noticed that she had a horn attached to her head, and try as he might, that thing was not coming off.
He started to wonder what kind of psycho had kidnapped him. All he could remember was the little pony in the woods being attacked by wooden wolves. He released Lyra and sat back down on the undersized bed which creaked heavily under his weight. This HAD to be a stunt by Mann Co., they must have some half-baked item sale coming up and they're setting him up for another video. Hey, maybe they decided to start filming "Meet The Pyro"! But why here!?
Lyra wasn't really sure what was happening with her new house guest; first he jumps her with what she assumed was hostile intentions, then he just stared at her for a few awkward moments, got really excited for a moment and now he was in some sort of spiraling depression. She really didn't know what to do next, she had very limited experience dealing with bipolar individuals other than maybe Twilight on occasion or Bonbon when she couldn't decide to go see Octavia or DJ-PON3. She slowly cantered over to his side and poked him in the shoulder with her hoof.
"Uh, hello? Mr…Ms…Mrs…Pyro? Hi, my name's Lyra and I just wanted to say thank you for saving me back there." That pony just talked. Pyro had been abducted by a talking pony…great. He curled up into a ball and began to slowly whimper as the gravity of the misunderstood situation dawned on him; he had been bested by a talking mint-green unicorn. The once soft moans had now turned into full-blown sobs as Pyro began (what Lyra could only assume was) crying. She quietly let herself out after that.
"Dang weather sure is acting odd these days, glowing balls popping in and out of the sky, and now purple lightning? Are the princess' off their rockers?"
"Heh, they're probably not too far off from being reduced to rocking chairs, old bags! HA!" The rest of the unicorns laughed at the crude attempt at humor. They had all been up late drinking cider and eating a few snack that they "liberated" from some of the weaker citizens of the small mountain community of Hill Yard Town, and with the night just getting underway, nopony was safe from their witty satire. Not even the strange purple lightning.
"PURPLE lightning? What, too good for regular colors? I wonder which pegasus messed THAT up!" said one of the larger unicorns.
"It was probably that one we keep hearing about, Rainbow something…"
"Yeah that's it; Rainbow Crash! HAWHAWHAW!" They all began to laugh again. An observer could probably feel their I.Q. dropping after watching this drama about how the school systems are failing for more than a minute or so. They continued disrupting the peace of the otherwise quiet mountain face for hours; making insightful commentaries about current fashion, their fellow gang members, and who's mother truly smelled of spoiled poultry.
It wasn't until one of the delinquent unicorns pointed out something heading their way that everypony in the small cavern all focused on the same thing.
"Hahaha! Good one, Mauler! He doesn't wear pants, how would anypony know if they were fancy or not? Hey, what's that?"
"That…it looks like…a Nightmare Night pumpkin! It's already carved and everything; LET'S SMASH IT!" With that, a small stampede stormed off to mindlessly destroy an oddly placed holiday decoration. Gravel was the first unicorn to reach the pumpkin and take the first buck, which didn't have the results he was hoping for. He spun mid-gallop and planted both hooves squarely on the overgrown squash, only to be sent flying in the opposite direction. The slower unicorns that hadn't quite caught up were forced to hit the dirt as the scrawny thug flew over their heads with the same grace as an eagle piloting a blimp.
The roaring laughter at their counterpart's failed attempt soon died as eveypony in attendance meet the same fate; kicking the vegetable as hard as they could only to have the carved face mockingly stare them down with candle-lit eyes.
"Oy mates, we've been going about this all wrong; we gotta dowse the flame first. S' a fire hazard," said Back Alley as he walked over to the unfazed gourd and lifted one of his back legs. A mound of dirt rapidly formed underneath him out shot the same dark glove that Celestia had defeated mere minutes before. It grabbed the colt by his neck and held him in place.
"ARGH! Let me go, ya' stinking-" He stopped himself as his sleep-deprived eyes followed the glove down to it's arm that was also poking out of the muck and mire; it was nothing but bone.
A second arm appeared and slammed into the soil, struggling with some effort of working solo to haul up it's buried treasure while it's twin continued to hold the adolescent unicorn in a vice grip. The sky over head twisted and grew dim as the stars seemingly vanished from view and was replaced by swirling clouds and an eery mist that arouse from the pumpkin's features. The pumpkin itself shock as the arm forced the rest of the body to arise underneath it. A tattered black cloak was wrapped around the base of the abnormally large pumpkin that connected it to a long torso. The rest of the upper body was more of the same; black tattered shirt with torn sleeves which showcased the bleached bone that solely comprised the exposed part monster's arms. A simple belt with a grotesque silver pumpkin buckle drew the dividing line on where the waist was supposed to be and held up what remained of the creature's pants. Just like with the arms, all that could be seen was pearly white bone down to the large leather riding boots. "Teeth" sprung from the carved mouth's rim and sharpened into fangs.
As the beast stood, a purple aura caused him to glow in the darkness of the cold autumn night. His presence was nothing short of commanding, as he stood at least three times the height of any given pony present at this terrifying scene. He looked down at the quivering pony still trapped in his hand. He had involuntarily relieved himself on the monster's glove, upon noticing this, the beast wound up, and hurled the terrified unicorn into the distance. He wiped his hand and crouched over the hole he had emerged from, peering down into the pit for something of critical importance.
A rock connected with the back of his makeshift head. "HEY! Nopony does that to one of my guys! NOPONY!" The monster did little to acknowledge him other than a slight snort of amusement as he rummaged around in the crater from which he had risen. Switchblade felt his face burn at his increasing anger, and withdrew the weapon for which he was named. "YOU DON'T MOCK ME!"
He used his magic to slam the thin knife into the vertebra of the massive creature who then dipped low into the opening in the ground. Believing his adversary defeated, Switchblade jumped into the air as the other unicorn gangsters cheered and laughed at the fallen abomination.
"AH-HA, FOUND IT." The chilling voice crept into their ears and froze in place. The punctured spine had no effect on the boogie man, he had slumped over only to get a better grip on his weapon of choice. The skeletal arm rose up from the pit to reveal the horrifying Headtaker, which glowed purple and even had the same smile as it's master carved in it. He faced the unicorns, those who weren't too terrified to move started backing away. "NOW, LET'S SEE HOW STRONG THOSE HORNS ARE."
He folded his arms across his chest and looked towards the sky. He vanished into a plume of smoke and reappeared on the other side of the small herd. They weren't so dumb as miss the blatantly obvious fact that he now stood between them and the only path down cliffside, and his slow advance forced them even closer to the abyss.
One of them attempted to teleport himself out of harm's way but his horn only managed to sputter a few dull sparks. Some of the others had the same idea and unfortunately the same results. They had very few options open to them; jump and hope for the best, engage this behemoth in hoof-to-axe combat, or welcomingly accept him as their new overlord. They picked door number 2; FIGHT the big scary fiend armed with an axe that was almost as big as they were.
Fear and cognitive thought gave way to mob mentality as four larger unicorns charged at the giant with their natural weapons rooted firmly in their heads. Poor choice, he was planning on them rushing. With Headtaker back in his possession, he wielded it like an expert, which made sense since he had been practicing with it for over two centuries. One swing was all he needed to take out the lot.
Something was wrong; normally when he sliced off someone's head, he could feel himself becoming more powerful, much like how the spirits that inhabited the cursed Eyelander would enhance their wielder's strength for every decapitation they made with it. So why didn't he feel the same? He looked down at the fallen Equestrians; he had aimed too high and had only severed their horns.
"WELL, GUESS I'LL HAVE TO TRY AGAIN…" He grumbled as he raised the grim axe over his orange pumpkin head but wasn't able to finish the execution before a voice interrupted him.
"HEADSSS…ER, HORNSSS. YEAH, DO HORNS." Horns? What the devil was the Headtaker talking about? The infernal lumberjack picked up one of the horns, the small grey spike was pumping blood at an almost as impressive rate as it's owner's forehead. It shook violently and forced it's way out of his grip and into his hollow head. He glanced down at one of the forming pools of blood that splattered across the cliffside; the horn had placed itself near the eternal candle that illuminated the bowels of his face and had become encased by the strange green growths much like the ones on the left side of his head.
Then he felt the rush. It was unlike anything he'd ever felt! The power was indescribable, and all from one measly unicorn horn. He greedily gathered the others he had amputated and stuffed them into his mouth. The light inside his head grew as bright as the mid-day sun and shown out across the countryside in a cascade of varying colors. The light eventually died down as the horns found their places inside the demon's jaw.
"THIS POWER IS INCONCEIVABLE! I MUST HAVE MORE…" and so he did. He harvested the horns of all those present; some struggled, some pleaded, some even tried to jump and take their chances with the chasm of almost certain doom. Not that they got very far, with each horn consumed, the monster gained a fraction of it's magical ability on top of the strength he received from the Headtaker. He managed to stop any and all attempts at escape with simple levitation spells he cast upon the wannabe lemmings. Fresh blood painted every aspect of the mountain as the pools began to overflow and spill down the mountain.
After twenty minutes of what even the Medic would consider malpractice, it was down to the last of the Hill Yard Gang; Switchblade. He hadn't been able to move after witnessing his friends brutally disfigured and having been splashed with blood multiple times. He could feel the cold air wisp around his ears and trembling legs drenched in sweat. While his friends weren't dead (as far as he could tell), even he knew that a phantom limb would be a horrible fate for anypony…one that he was about to share with his band of thieves.
The glowing purple assailant turned his focus away from the downed unicorn shaking from the cold of the night and blood loss and locked onto Switchblade. They say that everypony sees death before he comes for you, nopony said anything to Switchblade about him being a pumpkin-headed, 12ft. tall axe-wielding skeleton. He began to quake, his throat closed up, and sweat poured down his face and lightly sprinkled the blood-soaked earth. The bipedal terror picked him up with the magic of…oh Celestia, that's Gravel's horn. He'd recognize that green horn and matching aura anywhere, even coming from the jowls of a demon.
"Who-o-o are yo-o-ou?" he stammered nervously. The magical energy fading from his form as the black leather glove tightened around his burning throat.
"MY NAME IS SILAS MANN, BUT YOU CAN CALL ME 'THE HORSELESS HEADLESS HORSEMAN!'" Those were the last words Switchblade heard as a unicorn before he felt an unmatched pain tear through his skull as the Headtaker made short work of his precious horn. "ALTHOUGH, I DON'T PLAN ON BEING HORSELESS FOR VERY LONG…"