Can;t wait for more chapters!

>>65826582

Agreed.

>>65826582 Thanks, glad you enjoyed it!

>>65866586 Thanks for reading, look out for more chapters soon!

I wonder if Celestia will be suspicious of him...

Interesting... As for, 'Islam's holy war against America', I have mixed feelings about, but I digress.  This is a site for Fanfic not philosophical arguments.

Warning: Spoilers in this comment. Do not read the second reply unless you've already read chapter 6.

>>66206620 Or maybe, it'll be the other way around...

>>66246624 It's only for the plot. The reason I chose an unstable nation like Iran, and an islamic alliance, is because it is believable that WWIII could arise out of region such as the Middle East. I admit I wanted to have it between the United States and Russia (or China.), but it's just too cliche and its been played out by every recent video game like Modern Warfare 2, Bad Company, etc. to me. As for Islam's "holy war," its not likely, but its possible/believable that in several decades, Islamic extremists could rise to power, and ignite a war involving most of the world's super powers that would ravage Earth as we know it? Is it not likely we could have another major religious conflict, like the Crusades?

If it ends up offending anypony, I'll need to change that. But its only for plot purposes, and I found it less cliche then "derp herp MW2 Russia vs USA WWIII lololol."

I'll try to be less politically correct from now on in a MLP fanfic.

I think you mean Applejacks southern "drawl" here.

Interesting...  It's not often a Human in Equestria story has that as its cause.  I'm interested to see where this is going.  (Careful wording due to potential spoilers and comments showing up in table of contents.)

Interesting... I'll be keeping an eye on this.

i look forward to future chapters

I swear if you angst this into "HUMANS ARE HORRIBAD MONSTERS" I'm going to stop reading.

I'm liking this.

Listening to the Top Gun Theme while reading this chapter was the best decision ever. It ended just as I finished.

"Are you a pony?"

"No, this is Patrick!"

It'll be . . . interesting to see how a purple heart veteran (in the US Army, of all armies no less) reacts to Ponyville.

Also, I'm worried about Applejack.  Guns are dangerous, yo.

>>66356635 Fixed, thanks for the heads up!

>>66536653 >>66966696>>68946894 Thanks for reading, glad y'all enjoyed it, keep a lookout for chapter 8 soon!

>>69026902 This is my favorite comment forever.

>>69376937 Oh god I lol'd, thanks for that.

Is this listed on EqD yet? I only found it here via pure blind luck. *Bookmarks*

Interesting... There was another story like this... Not exactly the same but similar enough, though I forget what it was called.

I remember it followed a character named Sigmund who was found in the Everfree forest. And he was a psychologist who used social psychological techniques and some careful thinking to realize the world would end by nuclear war in about ten years, so he cryogenically froze himself. But when Earth became Equestria the magic in the atmosphere (or something) essentially mutated him into a pony over time. The story followed him and healing his amnesia.

The apocalyptic fate of Earth here sorta reminds me of that is all...

Anyway, pretty good story. Could use a bit of polish, but overall a fun read.

I like where this is going so far!  Awesome job!

I'm really liking this!  Keep up the good work!

badass fo sho

>>70577057 Not at the moment.

>>70717071 I've been working on getting a review and some proof-reading/editing done from the good people of ponychan, but it's going slowly. And if you ever come across that story again, send me a link, I'd love to read it!

>>71227122 Gracias, hombre

>>71387138 Thanks homie

Well, that explains "why him" at least. Oh, `Tia is going to be ~SO~ destressed to see her careful plan unraveling even before it starts...

F*cking epic bro, want moare.

Awesome, man!  I love this story!  Keep the chapters rolling!

Oh geez, love this so hard.  

This may be the oddest juxtaposition of thing I have ever seen in a fanfic. We've got a pretty legitimate depiction of war and then we have... ponies. You do seem to be pulling it off fairly well so far as I've read. The past scenes are done very well. Probably why the shift seems so jarring at times, but otherwise, this is an interesting combination and certainly one I haven't seen before.

Nice fic.

(oh, but one thing you might want to think about is cutting down on the brand names... every time you whip out the "Kawasaki Ninja ZX6R" I think I've suddenly stumbled across product placement)

Hmm... well, it's certainly become a story with much higher stakes since the midpoint... the element of potential misanthropy worries me a little bit, but you've mostly handled it pretty well.

I'm curious... a bit wary, but curious nonetheless.

I am really enjoying this story. Please keep writing on it. Wonderful job so far, it sucked me right in

>>80708070 Something incredibly complex is going on, but I haven't revealed everything yet. I hope I'm able to write it out well without it being too confusing.

>>80848084>>81988198>>82048204 Thanks for reading!

>>83558355>>92499249 I'm currently in the process of doing a series of major revisions on the entire story before another chapter is added. The good folks on the ponychan training grounds are helping me revise this so that plot holes, and that annoying "Kawasaki Ninja ZX6R" will be taken care of. I haven't finished revising the story yet, but Chapter 9 will not be out until the revision is done, and that could take a while.

>>94869486 Glad you enjoyed it! I haven't abandoned this story, it will be continued as soon as the big revisions are done.

goooood

This story has successfully made me vomit rainbows, not sure if I should be happy or worried.

I'm....SEXY?! What did I do?!

>>66296629

Makes sense

MAKE HIM BEAT THE SHIT OUTA GREYBURN, I COMMAND YOU!

Amazing story so far. Keep up the good work!

Now, normally I would critique your work, but right now, I'm too tired to do so

Tracking.

This is great!^_^

A good fanfic!^_^

I like it!^_^

Fantastic!^_^

I want more!^_^

The primer in a self contained cartridge can't get wet.

>>69376937

They aren't dangerous if you use 'em right.

Oh good it's on here! Hello! Saw this on fanfiction.net a while back and I finally saw that you revised it. I must say that not only is it more believable and heart touching, but it still has it's weak points. Something about the dialog between Luna and celestia seemed off but otherwise I love the story and concept! Yep this stories gonna be a good story......wait.....

>>1564615646

I believe my work here is done.

>>1591015910

Originally, that's what I had happen. However, I received numerous complaints about the fact that Patrick was injured, and then he goes and beats up a colt. While I preferred it the other way, sometimes, things just kind of have to make sense. We may run into Grayburn again in a later chapter... and Patrick may be recovered by then.

>>1569115691

>>1606016060>>1606716067

Thanks for reading!

>>1609016090

I will probably be changing the word "primer" to something else. Thanks for catching that.

>>1612316123

I tried to revise them the best I could, but before this story is over, I will probably end up having someone else edit the Luna and Celestia Chapters and cutscenes for me.

"rejected the laws of physics and substituted her own."

MYTHBUSTER REFERENCE :D

I was reminded of this song while reading this

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5uS3MDTxy6w&feature=related

I listened to St. Elmo's Fire while I read this, best decision ever.

>>69026902 The song is called "Highway to the Danger Zone"

Wow, I bet he REALLY wants to put a cap in Celesita's flank.

This may be by far the best fan fiction iv'e read. Not just in MLP, but out of ALL the fan fictions i have read regarding other topics. I love your writing style, keep the goods coming~!

>>1620016200

>>1635316353 I can see why.

>>1678616786 With great hair comes great responsibility.

>>1681216812 My thoughts exactly.

>>1683016830 Getting a broken jpeg here

>>1705017050 Wow, that really means a lot. All I can say is thanks for reading and glad you enjoyed it!

Also, I kind of derp'd when I was editing a chapter earlier and accidentally pressed "unpublish" instead of "edit," so I pressed publish to get the chapter back up. Apparently, it put it back up to the top of the list for updated stories. I didn't mean to do that, the only thing that's changed since I uploaded the revision summary is the bit about the "primer" (doesn't make sense, self-contained rounds are waterproof.) has changed, and several grammatical issues and paragraphing issues I never caught were fixed. Chapter 9 ain't out yet, don't get your hopes up.

>>1721917219

Sorry, I can't seem to get these d*mned pictures to work.