Chapter 32: What Could Have Been
Seeker quietly made her way out of the memory crystal vault, having already replaced the stolen crystal before anyone noticed. With most of the guard on a man hunt for Sovereign, security was particularly lax at the moment. It was a good thing too, because Seeker wasn’t at her best right now. Her shattered horn had caused a minor loss of balance and focus. She may as well get used to it. It wouldn’t be long before the rest of her peers decided to make the loss permanent.
With that loose end taken care of, Seeker had to think of where she could find Sovereign. She started trying to see things from his perspective to give her a better idea of where to search. I never knew my parents, so it’s unlikely I’d know where they live. I’ve only have about one year of experience outside of the isolated nexus. I only ever went out when accompanied by my lovely Shadow, and that was usually to a theater, or music hall, or museum, or occasionally a nice restaurant, so I wouldn’t know how to go to find safe passage off world. That means he’s probably still on Aiur. No wait, he’s a Preserver. That means he knows every square inch of Aiur by memory, even if he hasn’t seen it himself. But he also relied entirely on the Khala, so without it he’s as helpless as a lost school colt. Realization finally struck. He also has the memories of a certain Dark Templar! Which means if he did find access to a warp gate before the alert went out, there is one place above all else he would likely go…
Sovereign was still getting used to his newly acquired void magic. Staying invisible required a bit of concentration, and he had no idea how to turn his clothing invisible. His white and gold robes would have given him away as a preserver anyway, which would have drawn too much attention, so he had to get rid of them back on Aiur. He was wearing nothing but his bare fur, and a viel of bent light when he had first arrived on this world. Fortunately he managed to acquire clothing from a shop to help him fit in.
It was moments like this he was glad his people didn’t use currency. He kept his severed horn covered to avoid drawing attention since severed horns were the mark of an exile after all. It wasn’t hard to hide since many ponies on this desert planet preferred thick robe like garments complete with hoods and face masks.
Shakuras was a strange world. It seemed to always be dark outside, with purple streaks of light across the sky. One side of the planet that was a constant day which was too hot for ponies to survive on, and the other side of the planet was a constant night that was too cold. The planets population mostly stayed in an area between the two halves that was in a state of perpetual twilight, which could be identified by the purple streaks of light up above. Abandoned protoss ruins suggested that the protoss were adapted to survive on either side of the world, but pony physiology wasn’t nearly as resilient. The fact the primary source of vegetation on this mostly desert world were greenhouses meant the sustainable population was very limited.
The world had very little strategic interest to the ponies, but it did hold a place of cultural importance. This world was once the capital of the Protoss Empire after Aiur fell, so many remnants of protoss culture and technology could be found here at one point. After the archeological value dried up, the planets population became rather sparse, though many members of the Dark Order do make an occasional pilgrimage.
The only real industry was an orbital drive yard used to produce vessels for the Golden Armada. While it once served a key role during the Khalai rebellion in secretly producing ships, Shakuras limited resources prevented it from remaining a strong industrial center as the New Khala grew in power and territory.
Sovereign was at the planet's capital and only city, the city of Talematros. It was hardly a grand city, but that might serve to his advantage. He had no clue if the others knew he had made contact with a Dark Templar memory crystal, but if they didn’t, then they’d have no reason to believe he would ever come here.
Sovereign had been here for a day now, and he wasn’t quite sure what he was supposed to do with himself. What was a Preserver without a horn after all? As if fate were adding insult to injury, a rather revolting cutie mark had finally made his appearance, which was a set of broken shackles. What the hell does that even mean? he thought to himself. If it meant he was free of his responsibilities as a Preserver, then fate had to have been playing some kind of sick joke on him. This was the last thing he ever wanted.
The locals would also be getting suspicious soon if he didn’t find a job. While the Khalai didn’t use currency, everyone was expected to pull their own weight. The drive yards weren’t an option because they kept too many records. He needed something more off the charts. The greenhouses could always use an extra set of hooves, and they probably didn’t get too many visitors. He concluded that was the best option if he planned to stay off the radar.
He wasn’t really certain why he came to this world. Something was telling him to come here however. It wasn’t his own memories, or even those of the memory crystals, as they were too fragmented to make out. It might have been one of the memories he had absorbed as a Preserver, but those usually weren’t this prevalent. Whatever the source, something was urging him towards the desert. He gathered what supplies he could carry, and began what may very well had been a death march. He followed the road into the seemingly endless sands and didn’t look back.
Seeker wasn’t too pleased to be on Shakuras again. Her life on Aiur had made her used to the temperate weather. While Aiur did have its share of deserts, jungles, plains and just about every other kind of terrain, she had stuck to the green temperate regions of Antioch.
She wore her typical black robes, hood and face cover. On most worlds, this was the sign of a Dark Templar, but here it was the common attire.
Sovereign had a good head start on her. After the alert went out, many warp gates went into a lock down, preventing anyone from entering or leaving the planet. Since Shakuras wasn’t the most vital of words, it was one of the first to have its gateway lockdown lifted. Despite his significant head start, Sovereign probably didn’t know where to go on this world other than the place suggested by his newly acquired memories. Seeker felt confident she would find him there.
All she needed was a ride.
Seeker made her way over a dealer who would be able to provide her with a vehicle. A stallion made her way over to assist her.
“Can I be of assistance young lady?” asked the blue stallion.
“I require transportation. It doesn’t have to be anything luxurious, it just need to be able to hold two ponies,” replied Seeker.
The stallion noticed she wasn’t connected to the Khala, then realized she must have been with the Dark Order. He immediately wanted this mare gone, so he tried using the typical bureaucratic defense. “I’m sorry, but we can only give a vehicle to those with a work permit that shows they require one to reach their place of occupation. If you can’t provide one, then I’m afraid I can’t be of assistance.”
Seeker presented and ignited her warp blade immediately. “Proof of occupation as you requested, and I need it to reach my work place. Refuse my request, and you’ll be interfering with official Dark Order business,” lied Seeker.
The stallion didn’t trust the Dark Order as far as he could throw them, and he certainly didn’t want another troublesome Dark Templar showing up. Ultimately he decided the fastest way to get rid of the mare was simple to give her what she wanted. “Very well, come with me.”
The stallion presented her with a dune runner. A fast hover bike that could safely seat two ponies. Seeker could have pushed for something larger, in the event Sovereign needed to be taken back by force, but she also knew pushing this pony could have consequences. He might decide to argue his case to the Templar, which would only reveal that she wasn’t actually on Dark Order business. “This will do, I should be able to bring it back in one piece,” said Seeker.
The stallion didn’t respond. He presented her with the keys, and let her go. With her transportation secured, she made her way out into the desert.
Sovereign had no idea how long he’d been on the march for. It seemed like only a day, but with the perpetual twilight, it was impossible to tell. The ruins did seem familiar to him, as did this road, as did the greenhouse up ahead. He was too tired and thirsty to care about the fact he was about to ask a complete stranger for food, a place to stay and perhaps a job. His water had run out some time ago, so it wasn’t like he had much of a choice.
Sovereign approached green house’s door and rang the bell. He was greeted by earth pony. She was a cyan mare, with a dark blue mane, and purple eyes. The older earth pony examined the young stallion who panting very heavily. “Did you come out here on foot?!” she asked somewhat panicked. Sovereign looked like he was about to pass out. “Come inside, we’ll get you some water.”
“Thank… you…” replied Sovereign. He entered the dome and was relieved to be greeted by a blast of cold air. The dome was well lit, unlike the outside, and was filled with all sorts of vegetables. Some he hadn’t seen before, most likely native to this world, but the sight of it was making him hungry none the less.
There was also a fairly large farmhouse within the dome as well. Its appearance was less akin to Khala structures, and more to that of the other factions in the sector. A brick house with glass windows and what looked like a wooden door. The wood was fake of course, as there weren’t any tall or thick trees on Shakuras.
The mare walked him over to a small sink, pushed down on a pedal and turned on the water fossett. “Help yourself,” she insisted.
Sovereign eagerly began lapping up the water until he was satisfied. “Thank you so much. I’m still new to this world, so I wasn’t quite prepared for this kind of heat.”
“You’re welcome to some food as well, but I need to ask, what are you doing out here?” asked the mare.
“I’m looking for a job,” he answered.
“We could always use an extra set of hooves, but I still don’t understand why you would walk all the way out here on foot though,” pressed the mare. Then she noticed he wasn’t connected with the Khala. “You’re with the Dark Order!? We didn’t do anything, we’re just farmers!” replied the mare in a panicked tone.
“No, it’s nothing like that!” assured Sovereign.
A stallion had exited the farm house to see what the shouting was about. “What’s going on out here? Who in the void are you?!” asked the stallion. He was black furred with grey eyes and a grey mane.
Sovereign didn’t know what else to do but to explain his situation. “I’m not with the Dark Order I assure you. I’m…” Sovereign took off his hood to reveal his severed horn. “Hornless.”
“You mean a criminal,” corrected the stallion.
“No, I’m not an exile. Not yet anyway,” responded Sovereign. “I was in an accident, a Dark Templar was involved. I really don’t want to talk about it, but without my horn I couldn’t perform my duties anymore. That said, I need a new job if I want to stay with the Khalai. Please, I’ll do anything you ask. I can fix machines, I can do paper work, I can work the farm by hoof if that’s what you need. You name it, I’ve done it.”
The stallion pondered his proposal. He could use the labor after all. “Well talk about it after dinner. You look like you could use something to eat,” he replied.
Sovereign let out a sigh of relief. “Thank you so much. I promise you won’t regret this.”
He followed them inside the farmhouse to see dinner had already been set. They had two daughters at the table as well, both of them unicorns. The younger one was the spitting image of her mother, with the exception of the grey eyes. The appearance of older one however brought him great concern. She was black furred, with grey eyes and dark blue hair. If it weren’t for her obviously younger appearance, he would have thought she were Seeker.
Suddenly Sovereign had a good idea as to whose memories he was following, and why they had led him here. He contemplated leaving immediately, but then remembered he only had enough supplies on him for a one way trip. The mare prepared another plate for Sovereign and served him as well. “So what’s your name?” she asked.
“Sovereign Grey Horn. And you are?” asked Sovereign.
“I’m Emma Clanker, and this is my husband Robert Clanker. Our younger daughter is Sky, and our older is Trail,” she replied. “By the way, she needs a husband… just saying…”
“Mom!” shouted Trail.
“You know the Khala expects you to bare foals. You’re sixteen now, and it’s not like we get very many stallions out here,” answered Robert. “Provided you’re interested,” he said looking towards Sovereign.
Sovereign didn’t look towards the older filly. She reminded him too much of Seeker, and not in a good way. That was the last mare he wanted to think about at the moment.
“Do you have to talk about marriage every time you see a stallion?” complained Trail.
“Why not? He’s cute,” commented Sky who winked towards Sovereign.
“This is why Seeker ran away…” replied Trail.
That immediately confirmed Sovereign's fears. I must have absorbed a few of her memories when we were an Archon. Or maybe when we were in the Khala together? Or maybe one of the many times she entered my dreams? Damn… she really needs to learn to stay out of my head. If it were Seeker's memories that had brought him here, there was a good chance Seeker would follow.
“Trail! Don’t talk about that in front of guest,” said Emma.
“I hope you don’t mind me asking but… where are you two from originally?” asked Sovereign.
“We’re from the Dominion,” answered Robert. “Emma and I decided we didn’t want to get involved in the wars, so we joined the Khala. When they found out I had a trace of unicorn in me, and that my wife was still in her early twenties, they were more than willing to let us in. Provided we agreed to bear children that is. As I said, Trail is of age to bear foals, and it is what the Khala demands of us and of you. If you wish to stay here, we will expect you to have children.”
I have got to get out of here! I’ll just have to… uhh… damn it. I don’t have anywhere else to go! Sovereign decided to buy some time. “You have a very lovely daughter, and a farm, but things are moving a bit fast right now. Perhaps we can wait a few weeks. See how things work out between us?” he suggested. With enough time, he might be able to gather enough supplies to look somewhere else.
Then he made another realization. He was expected to breed no matter where he went. His status as a preserver allowed him to be exempt, but now that he was a hornless nobody, there was no way out of it. Maybe if he just gave life on the greenhouse a few weeks he might reconsider? Marriage couldn’t be that bad, he imagined it would be similar to living with Seeker, and the filly did look just like her sister. How bad could fatherhood be right?
“Alright, no need to go rushing into things. But remember, young fertile mares are a valued prize in the Khala. Keep that in mind before you get too old to be desirable,” warned Robert.
“What’s fertile mean?” asked Sky.
“We’ll tell you when you get older,” said Emma. The mother had learned from the first two daughters to wait before letting her Sky link with the Khala. There was some knowledge fillies weren’t meant to have yet.
After driving for a couple of hours, Seeker had reached her destination. A greenhouse dome with thick glass covering it. The glass was thick and blurred enough that it was very difficult to see inside. It wasn’t the most technologically advanced farm if memory served, as the robots and machinery that worked the greenhouse used weren’t powered by khaydarin crystals, and required much heavier maintenance. Seeker didn’t bother knocking; as expected the entry code to open the doors was still the same.
She entered the green house to see everything almost exactly the same as when she left, including the old farm house. Seeker opened the door and made her way towards the dining room where she could hear conversation. It had been a long time since coming home, and she wasn’t exactly certain she was ready for this. Seeker took a deep breath, then entered the dining room.
Everyone at the table looked up at her in an awkward silence. Her mother, her father, her sisters, and most importantly, her target.
“Seeker?” asked her mother who slowly got up to approach her. “It’s… it’s been so long. I can’t believe you came home!” she embraced her long lost daughter in a comforting hug. “What happened to your horn!? Are you an exile!?”
“Does this mean I don’t have to get married now?” asked Trail. “I mean, Seeker is older, and she should have had children by now right?”
“Umm… hi mom, hi everybody,” replied Seeker somewhat awkwardly. “I’m here for Sovereign. I need to take him home.”
“Take him home?” asked her father. “You two are living together?”
“Well we were,” answered Sovereign. “She was my-”
Before he could finish, Robert looked up at his oldest daughter and asked, “You mean to tell me you ran away from home because you didn’t want to get married. Then you get married anyway and don’t even bother to let us know!? How many kids did you have?”
“We aren’t married!” shouted Seeker.
“Guess he’s still up for grabs,” said Sky excitedly. The little filly latched onto one of Sovereign's hooves.
“No he’s not!” said Seeker.
“All is far in love and war!” argued Sky.
“I’m… just going to stay out of this one,” said Trail.
“Seeker, I can’t go back,” said Sovereign.
“Everyone shut up!” shouted the normally calm mother. “Ok… from the beginning. What in the void is going on here?!”
Seeker sat down with her family to explain the situation. They were completely shocked to hear she had dehorned a preserver.
Sovereign naturally had a few questions as well. “Seeker, I always thought you just didn’t like being linked with the Khala,” said Sovereign. “I had no clue it was because you just didn’t want to get married.”
“I didn’t like being in the Khala because I didn’t like constantly being reminded of what mom and dad had in store for me. I was to be given away to some stallion I’ve never met before, then have kids all day,” she replied.
“I know the feeling,” added Trail.
“I also didn’t like linking with it because… I didn’t want my family to know where I was,” continued Seeker.
“You never once visited your family?” asked Sovereign. “Seeker, I don’t even know where my family is, or who they are. I would have given up everything to be allowed to see them even once.”
“All we knew about her is one message she sent through the Khala when she told us she was joining the Dark Order,” said Robert. “She never said anything ever since.”
“I’m sorry everybody… I just… I didn’t want to face any of you,” said Seeker. “It just seemed easier on us all if we just didn’t see each other anymore.”
“Honey… we’re your family. We love you. You always have a home here,” replied Emma.
“You may have run away, but that doesn’t mean you're not our daughter anymore,” said Robert.
“Well… enjoy it while it lasts. I still have to bring Sovereign back,” she replied. “Afterwards I’ll probably be permanently dehorned and exiled.
“Then just don’t take him back,” said Sky. “Keep him here and get married. No one needs to know.”
Seeker smiled at her little sister. If only things were so simple. “That’s not how it works Sky. They’ll trace us back here eventually. If they find out you had anything to do with hiding him, they’ll probably exile all of us.”
“I don’t mind exile, horns are overrated. Plus Khalai society kind of sucks,” said Trail.
“I’ll look cuter as an earth pony anyway,” said Sky.
Sovereign could see this family really loved one another. They would all gladly give up their farm and horns just to have Seeker back. He couldn’t let them destroy their lives on his behalf. He had to do something. “I’m going back,” said Sovereign. “We’ll leave in the morning.”
“No one ever comes to Shakuras anymore. You don’t have to turn yourself in. And frankly I’d rather my daughter not be exiled,” said Emma.
“We don’t have a choice,” said Seeker. “We’ll spend the night, and leave tomorrow.” Seeker wrapped her hooves around each one of her family members at least once and told them she loved them and that she would miss them. Emma served her daughter a plate, and did her best to enjoy what she was certain would be the families last meal together.
Seeker was laying outside in the desert, staring up into the abyss. It had been a long time since she had been home, and this would probably be the last day she’d ever spend here. I’m sure it won’t be too bad. At least I got to say goodbye before I left, she thought to herself.
“We knew each other almost our whole lives. Why didn’t you ever tell me about your family?” asked Sovereign. Seeker looked over to see Sovereign approaching. He took a seat next to her. “You should have at least visited them. Your family really loves you.”
“I know. I just… I was never in the mood to have the ‘when are you going to get married’ argument with my parents,” replied Seeker. “When I told them about joining the Dark Order through the Khala, that conversation turned into a huge argument. We were on bad terms ever since. That and… I don’t like people knowing I’m an Imperial. I get enough distrust just for not linking with the Khala.”
“So you’re an Imperial, it’s not a big deal,” commented Sovereign. “I don’t know anything about my parents. For all I know they were Umojan inquisitors. How did you even get away in the first place? It took me hours to reach the green house.”
“Dad was heading into town one day so I went with him. Gave him the slip and went for the warp gate. As you’ve probably seen, security around Shakuras isn’t the best,” explained Seeker. “So… what are you going to do when we get back?”
“No idea… they don’t really have a use for me anymore,” answered Sovereign.
“I’m sure Zamara will find a way to keep you around,” said Seeker. “I’ll probably be left to captured by pirates on the edge of Consortium space.”
“Seeker don’t say that,” said Sovereign.
“They’ll probably take turns raping me for a few hours,” continued Seeker jokingly. “I’m not sure what will be worse. Getting lodged out the airlock when they finish, or being locked in closet as a love toy for whenever someone gets bored.”
“That’s… a rather twisted sense of humor you have about all of this,” commented Sovereign.
Seek reached over and put a hoof on his leg. “I’m… really going to miss you Sovereign.”
Sovereign looked into her grey eyes. She looked so different than before. When he was linked to the Khala, he could never experience any heightened emotions of his own, just those of others when he relived their memories. But right now he felt as if he were seeing Seeker for the first time. Her gentle smile, the way her mane waved in the wind, her lovely grey eyes. He just now started to realize how beautiful she really was.
Seeker blushed a bit as he thought that. “I’m glad you think so,” she said.
“What?!” replied Sovereign. “I’m not linked to the Khala… how did you-”
“You left a fragment of your mind inside of me remember?” explained Seeker. “I can read your mind whenever you’re close.”
“Oh that’s right,” said Sovereign. “I wonder…”
Seeker suddenly lifted a hoof and touched her snout. “What the! Did you do that?” asked Seeker
Sovereign chuckled. “I guess it works both ways. It’s just like when I was able to control you inside the Khala. Don’t worry, I promise I won’t make you do anything weird.”
“Well… maybe I want you to make me do something weird,” she responded. Sovereign suddenly had a nervous expression on his face. “Thanks to that fragment, I not only always know what you’re thinking, but what you’re feeling as well. “And right now you’re feeling things you’ve never felt before.”
Sovereign began to sweat. He tried to reply, but all he could do was stutter. “Ssshhh” said Seeker as she put a hoof over his lips. “I know it's strange feeling this way for the first time, but don’t worry. I’ll make it fun for you. Now… where were we the last time we tried this?”
Seeker wrapped her hooves around Sovereign and kissed him. She was relieved that this time Sovereign was able to react accordingly and returned the kiss. He wrapped his hooves around her as his tongue entered her mouth. She was surprised he knew what he was doing given it was his first time. Though through that memory fragment, she recognized he was reaching into the collective memory of the Khala for knowledge on what to do.
It kind of hurt the intimacy; she didn’t like the idea of being kissed by essentially every Khalai who ever lived and died, but at the same time she knew he was nervous and didn’t know what else to do. If anything, it meant she was in for a fun time herself. The kissing didn’t last long as Seeker pulled down his pants. Unlike last time, she was very excited to see he was up for the task. She began removing her clothing as well while using her magic to stimulate Sovereign's stallionhood. As he began to harden, Seeker got ready to mount him when suddenly Sovereign shouted “S-s-s-s-Sky!”
Seeker immediately released Sovereign. “Sky?!” asked Seeker. “You’re thinking of my little sister?! For voids sake Sovereign, she’s twelve!”
“No! Look, Sky!” he shouted pointed towards something.
Seeker looked up and screamed in shock as she saw her little sister staring at them in disbelief. Seeker and Sovereign both turned invisible as they put their clothing back on before reappearing. Damn it Sky! thought Seeker. I swear you’re about to get a rooster next to a block as cutie mark.
“Seeker… what were you and Mr. Sovereign doing?” she asked innocently.
“That depends… how much did you see?” asked Seeker.
“I saw you kissing each other. Then you grabbed his thingy with your magic and squeezed. Why did you do that?” asked Sky.
“He had an itch,” explained the older mare. “He can’t use his magic right now because of his horn, so I was getting it for him.”
“Oooohhh! Well your horn is broken too. Maybe I should get it for him?” suggested the filly.
“No!” shouted Sovereign. “I mean… she already got it… I’m fine now.”
“Sky what are you doing out here? It’s late,” asked Seeker.
“Mr. Sovereign woke me up. I was curious so I wanted to see what he was up to,” answered Sky.
“We were just talking, that’s all,” said Seeker. “Let’s get you back to bed alright?”
Sovereign and Seeker escorted the filly back to her bedroom. Seeker tucked in her little sister and gave her a kiss on the horn. “Now you go to sleep alright? I don’t want mom and dad getting mad at your for sneaking out at night.”
“Ok,” said Sky. “Do you have to leave again Seeker? I never got to know you. I’m going to miss you if you leave again so soon.”
“I’m sorry Sky. I wish I could have known you too… you were just a foal when I ran away. But I can’t stay here or you’ll all get in trouble,” explained Seeker. “But I’m glad I got to see you one more time. Be strong for mom and dad alright?”
“Alright. I love you,” replied Sky.
A tear almost formed in the older sibling’s eye. “I love you too sis.” Again Seeker kissed her horn, tucked her in and exited the room.
Sovereign had never seen, nor imagined Seeker as an older sibling. Of course up until today, he never imagined her as anything more than a childhood friend. Now he was seeing her in a different light.
As he left the room, Sky asked one more question. “Mr. Sovereign, are you and Seeker going to get married? That’s what mom and dad wanted.” Sovereign walked out the door pretending he didn’t hear her ask that question. He could easily have seen it happening were it not for the emotional control of the Khala keeping his feelings suppressed all of these years. Had he not been a Preserver and her not a Dark Templar, things could have been very different between them.
“In another life maybe,” whispered Seeker. Sovereign quickly remembered he had to be careful what thought whenever he was around Seeker. “I want to leave now, before they wake up.”
“But Seeker-” started Sovereign.
“I already said my good byes. Sovereign please… I don’t want to do that again when they wake up. Let’s just go,” she pleaded.
Sovereign complied with her wishes. They got onto the dune runner and made their way back to Talematros. Again it took a few hours, so Seeker passed the time by explaining everything that had happened in the months following his coma. After returning the dune runner, they finally they reached the gateway. There wasn’t much of a wait time, as few people came or went from the planet.
Seeker knew that once they crossed over, it wouldn’t be long before they were apprehended. She had to get some things off of her chest. “Sovereign… I’m really sorry for everything,” said Seeker. “If I had just listened when you said not to touch you, this all could have been avoided. We could have been living together in a nice palace. We’d both still have our horns.”
“Seeker don’t,” interrupted Sovereign. “I forgot to lock the door. You didn’t know what would happen, you were just trying to help. If it weren’t you, anyone else could have come along and done it. In a way… I’m glad it was you. I’m kind of glad you sliced off my horn.”
“Glad?! Why?!” asked Seeker.
“Well I never really got to feel any strong emotions when I was with the Khala. I never really got to see how much you meant to me. In fact I kind of wish I could have known sooner,” said Sovereign.
The two were silent for a moment, then out of nowhere Seeker kissed him. It wasn’t a very long or passionate kiss like that had back at the greenhouse, but she just wanted him to know she felt the same way.
Finally it was their turn to enter. They made their way through the gateway. It wasn’t long before a Templar spotted them.
It had been about three days now since they were put under house arrest in separate rooms. Since Sovereign's link to the Khala was severed, a court hearing was now underway to determine who was at fault for the incident involving Sovereign's dehorning.
While she was the Supreme Matriarch, Zamara was not to take a part in the sentencing. Sovereign had made an appeal that because Zamara had taken him in as an orphan, her attachment to him might cause a biased judgment. His appeal was acknowledged. Instead of Zamara being judge, jury and executioner, the judge would be a Grand Matriarch, and a jury of nine High Matriarchs. Sovereign and Seeker would both be tried together.
The Grand Matriarch first called Sovereign to the stand. Zamara was confident this would be an open and shut case. The evidence was stacked against her.
“Preserver Sovereign Grey Horn. Please explain to the members of the jury exactly what happened between you and your personal shadow, Seeker that led to the events surrounding your dehorning,” demanded the judge.
“It all started before I had left the isolated nexus. I had spent much time growing up with Seeker, so naturally I developed feelings for her. I… acted on them more than once,” admitted Sovereign.
Seeker immediately tried to interrupt, but suddenly found she was unable to move for some reason. The still hornless mare realized Sovereign was controlling her, preventing her from moving.
“Grand Matriarch, that is simply not true. Sovereign had never tried to sexually engage Seeker,” interrupted Zamara.
“Supreme Matriarch, what happens in an isolated nexus is beyond the scope of the Khala. Is it not true that Seeker consistently visited Sovereign?” asked the Grand Matriarch.
“Yes, but I doubt the two of them would ever-” replied Zamara.
“No one had kept an eye out on their behavior the entire time. If he admits that he acted on his feelings towards her, we have to take that as a confession. Mr. Grey Horn, you may continue.”
Sovereign wasn’t lying when he said he acted on his feelings towards her. They had become good friends after all. The fact they just happened to think he meant anything sexual was just a convenient assumption he didn’t bother to correct. “When I finally left the isolated nexus, she became my personal shadow. I quickly found I wasn’t ready for the rigors of becoming a Preserver. More than once I let Seeker know I didn’t feel ready. She pleaded a case to Zamara to return me to the isolated nexus on my behalf.” Again it wasn’t a lie. He did indeed let Seeker know he wasn’t ready. And she did indeed present that point to Zamara.
“When Zamara refused the request, another opportunity presented itself. I was well aware what could happen if Seeker and I made physical contact while my energy was in a state of flux. I left the door to my meditation chamber open, allowing her to enter. Seeker had no idea what was happening to me. She laid a hoof on my shoulder, causing us to merge. Shortly after she lost control and we became an archon. It seemed like a quick way to release myself of my responsibilities.” Again no lie was spoken. He did indeed know about what would happen if he touched her, and he did indeed leave the door unlocked, even if it wasn’t on purpose.
“So you willingly allowed yourself to merge with Seeker?” asked the Grand Matriarch.
“It seemed like an easy way out. When we were in a state of pure energy, I reached out to her first and she complied. In the end, the only reason I didn’t willingly go with Seeker into the void or Khala was because Zamara had joined the merge in an attempt to save us,” explained Sovereign. “It didn’t feel right letting her die for my sake."
Zamara again interrupted. “But while I was merged with them, I discovered Seeker had every intention of letting me die just so she could take Sovereign for herself! She even had the intention of trying this again had she been left as his shadow.”
“Supreme Matriarch, you know as well as I do that all but the most powerful minds are able to maintain control of their actions and thoughts while in an archon state,” countered the Grand Matriarch. “She can’t be held accountable for her state of mind as an archon, as she was clearly too young to control herself. The only thing we can take into account was the fact she had no intention of merging with Mr. Grey Horn when she was in control of herself, and that Mr. Grey Horn knew what would happen if he allowed Seeker to touch him.”
Zamara looked over towards Seeker with great anger. Is she just going to let Sovereign pay for her own stupidity?!
Seeker was still frozen in place by Sovereign's influence, unable to speak out against his half-truths. She noticed Zamara staring at her in anger, and could feel her anger pressing down on her.
Again Sovereign continued. “The time spent as an archon caused the collection of memories stored within the Khala to run rampant through my mind. I fell into a coma afterwards. During this time, Zamara tried to help me wake up, but the effort was futile. I saw an opportunity present itself when Seeker entered my subconscious in an effort to help me. I merged a fragment of my mind with hers, then forced her back into her body. With that fragment in her, I was able to take control of her body.”
“Is this true?” asked the Grand Matriarch as she looked over to Seeker.
Seeker did everything in her power to resist Sovereign's influence, but it was no good. Tears formed in her eyes as she slowly nodded her head against her will. The tears only made the jury feel sorry for her, and hate Sovereign that much more.
“What did you do after Mr. Grey Horn enslaved your mind?” asked the Grand Matriarch.
Again Seeker tried to resist him, and again she failed as Sovereign forced her to say the words, “I sliced off his horn to wake him up.”
“Did you tell anyone what happened?” asked the Grand Matriarch.
“I immediately told Zamara,” answered Seeker.
“How did the Supreme Matriarch respond?” asked the Grand Matriarch.
“She was very angry. She used her magic to… shatter my horn as a punishment,” answered Seeker. A commotion broke out within the crowds after hearing their leader had assaulted this young mare who was clearly a victim of circumstance. Sovereign didn’t want to get Zamara in trouble, so he added on to that statement. “At the time however, neither of us were aware Sovereign had any influence on me. I truly believed I had done it out of my own accord. She believed the same.”
“Either way, it was very inappropriate for the leader of the Khalai to strike down one of her own followers. Especially a young mare,” added the Grand Matriarch. Zamara noticed she was receiving her fair share of disapproving glares from her subjects. This case would truly hurt her image, and potentially shake their faith in her leadership.
“I would also like to add that Zamara did save my life when I was an archon. I owe my life to that mare,” added Seeker.
“The court recognizes this, but that is not the primary concern at the moment. Mr. Sovereign please continue with your testimony,” said the Grand Matriarch.
“After I had woken up, I ran away. I had some of Seeker's memories from when we merged as an archon, so I fled to Shakuras believing no one would follow me there. Seeker however made the same conclusion and tracked me back to her parent’s greenhouse,” said Sovereign.
“And how was Seeker able to retrieve you when you were able to control her so easily?” asked the Grand Matriarch.
“I saw how much she meant to her family. I didn’t feel right punishing their daughter for my weakness.” Not a hint of doubt was in Sovereign's voice as he said that. “I returned with her to Aiur where we were apprehended. Three days later we’re in this courtroom.”
“Do you have any further testimony?” asked the Grand Matriarch.
“No I do not Grand Matriarch,” answered Sovereign.
The Grand Matriarch looked over to Seeker. “Seeker please present your testimony now. Describe in detail the events leading up to Mr. Grey Horns dehorning.”
“I have nothing to add Grand Matriarch. Everything is as he says it is,” replied Seeker. She wanted to punch Sovereign for forcing her to say those words.
The Grand Matriarch began to close the case. “If there is nothing more to add then-”
In a fit of rage Zamara shouted, “She’s a liar and a whore! She’s the one who threw herself on Sovereign! Ask her! I saw it in the Khala, she tried to force herself on Sovereign!”
“With all due respect Supreme Matriarch, the Matriarchy has already decided you are not to take a role in this hearing. We allow you to be here simply out of respect for your leadership, but this is going too far,” said the Grand Matriarch.
Zamara regained her composure. “I apologize. But please realize Sovereign has been dehorned. He is delusional and has no idea what he is saying.”
Zamara’s outburst had caused Sovereign to lose focus, which allowed Seeker to shout an outburst. “I did initiate sexual advances!”
The crowd went quite. Finally the Grand Matriarch asked, “When and how did that happen?”
Sovereign had again regained control of Seeker. He needed to make this convincing. “When we were at the greenhouse, Sovereign and I were out in the desert. He again took control of me.” So far he was telling the truth, even if it was for just an instant. Some members of the jury gasped as they immediately reached their own conclusions as to where this was heading.
“I pulled off his pants. I…” Seeker fought with all she had, but only caused herself to stutter. Once again tears began to flow. “While my little sister was watching. He… made… me… stroke… his...”
“You don’t have to finish that sentence, I think we’ve heard enough,” said the Grand Matriarch. “It is not unknown that certain members of the civilian and military hierarchy abuse their position to get illegal sexual favors from their subordinates. I simply hoped that a Preserver would be above such actions. It is tragically obvious that this perversion can be found at every level of the hierarchy. Mr. Grey Horn, not only did you run from your responsibilities to your people, you also used your influence to force this young mare to fulfill your perverted desires. In front of a filly no less! Words cannot describe my disgust for your actions.” The Grand Matriarch paused for a moment, then looked towards the jury. “This court is adjourned. Ladies of the jury, you may take however long you need to reach a verdict.”
“That won’t be necessary Grand Matriarch!” said one of the High Matriarch jury members. “We’ve already come to unanimous decision. Sovereign Grey Horn is guilty of deserting his duties, and of rape. The people of the Khala demand exile!”
The other members of the jury, and in fact the entire courtroom began to shout the word “Exile” loudly. It would seem judgment had been passed.
It had been a couple of days since the hearing, and Sovereign’s exile was underway. Zamara remembered the angry crowds screaming at him as he left the courtroom. She knew that if his exile was made public, he would receive a similar farewell. While she couldn’t prevent his sentence, she was able to keep it from becoming a public event.
Zamara had also managed to make sure Sovereign had a strong chance of survival. Most exiles were abandoned in the middle of a nowhere on a border world with three days provisions. Few survived the first. Zamara had arranged for Sovereign to receive a shuttle which was loaded with food, Consortium bits, and anything else she felt would help him survive. Anything she could do to help him stay alive and get through this.
Since it was a private event the only people who showed up were Zamara, and against her wishes Seeker. She still held much contempt against that mare for what was happening to Sovereign.
Zamara was the first to speak to Sovereign in his shuttles cockpit. “I know you don’t have any experience outside of New Khala space, so be careful who you trust alright? There is plenty of money, so you should be alright, but try not to get robbed. Also if you can, try to get to one of the Consortium core worlds. There is less piracy there. Avoid contact with all other ships until you arrive at the core worlds, odds are they’ll try to rob you.”
“I know Supreme Matriarch. I’ll be alright,” assured Sovereign.
Zamara wrapped her hooves around Sovereign in an embrace. “Please be careful out there… I love you.”
Sovereign had never expected to hear those words from his mentor. She was usually the most level headed pony he knew. He slowly returned the hug and answered with, “I love you too… Zamara.”
Zamara smiled at him, kissed him on his horn stump, and then walked away doing her best to hold back her tears. As she walked off the ship, she saw Seeker standing by the ramp waiting her turn to speak to him. Zamara didn’t say a word as she passed her.
Seeker made her way onboard the ship next to speak to Sovereign. The two hornless unicorns stared at one another in awkward silence before Seeker decided to speak. She had a set of clothing which she presented to Sovereign. “So… since you can use void magic now, I got you these. It’s a Dark Templar attire that’ll turn invisible when you do,” she explained.
“Thanks you. I’m sure that’ll come in handy,” said Sovereign.
“And I also want you to have this as well,” she continued. She pulled off her warp blade and presented it to him. “I’m hoping it’ll keep you safe.”
“Seeker I… I don’t know what to say,” replied Sovereign has he equipped the blade and ignited it for just a moment.
“Just take care of it alright… it’ll be something to remember me by,” said Seeker.
“Thank you, I will,” said Sovereign. “Seeker, I’m sorry I took control of you in that courtroom. But your family-”
“I know. You don’t have to explain,” said Seeker. “Sovereign… I love you.”
For the first time, Sovereign kissed her first. They were locked in that kiss for several seconds knowing it would be the last they shared together. Nothing else was said between them Seeker turned around, and walked down the ramp. Shortly afterwards, the shuttle and the frigate escorting the shuttle, were taking off for the border.
It had been two weeks now, but the day of the trail was still fresh in Zamara’s memory. Sovereign had taken the fall for Seeker's foolishness, and Zamara’s image was tarnished as the leader who had raised a deserter and a rapist. She tried arguing for a mistrial; for all they knew Seeker was still under Sovereign's control during the testimony. But the Grand Matriarch argued that if that were the case, then it was the equivalent of a confession, which they had no reason to reject.
Zamara had been meditating for hours, trying to focus her mind as a few tears made their way down her face. It was days like this she hated her pony physiology. Her old body was not only incapable of tears, but her old brain was also incapable of this level of emotion. But as she thought on it, she concluded she didn’t want to deprive herself of these emotions. She could simply link with the Khala to help her move on and get over Sovereign, but that felt like a betrayal. He was her student, and while she never said it to his face, he was also her son.
For all of her power in the Khala, she did not have the authority to overturn a decision that was backed by virtually every Matriarch in the Khala. If she tried to protect Sovereign, they would demand her resignation, perhaps even declare war. She couldn’t let that happen. No matter how much she loved Sovereign, she had to accept he had made his decision. While she was unable to prevent his exile, she was able to make it more survivable. Hopefully he would find a way to make it on his own.
Zamara knew Sovereign loved Seeker, even if he couldn’t realize it yet. Not too long ago it wasn’t hard to imagine Seeker as a daughter in law, even if the two could never marry. It was obvious Sovereign did what he did for Seeker’s sake and no one else. She simply wished Sovereign would have thought things through before he threw his life away like that.
It wasn’t solely either Seeker or Sovereign’s fault really. In hindsight, she should have simply told Seeker the dangers of being around Sovereign when he was in flux. And even if he had locked that meditation chamber, he still could have gone into flux when he was in bed, or out in the hall. It could have happened at any number of inconvenient times that would have ended with Sovereign in a comatose state. It was a shame really; those two kids could have spent a happy life together. Maybe not as husband and wife, but Preserver and Shadow would have been the next best thing. Zamara calmed herself finally as she fantasized the happy life that could have been.
A knock could be heard from outside of her meditation chamber. Zamara came out of her meditation and answered the door to find Seeker standing before her. The mare’s horn was healing nicely these past couple of weeks. The two hadn’t spoken to each other ever since Sovereign's exile, but time had eased Zamara’s anger.
“Supreme Matriarch. I just wanted to…” Seeker came to a dead pause. Despite rehearsing her apology, she was drawing a blank.
“I could call the guards,” threatened Zamara. “How did you get in?”
“I’ve been coming here for over a year. I know how to get around without being spotted,” she answered. “I also know I’m the last person you want to speak to, but I needed to let you know that I wasn’t in control during that trial. I didn’t want Sovereign to take the blame for me!”
Zamara took a deep breath. “I believe you. And I forgive you.”
“You do?” asked Seeker.
Zamara pulled Seeker into the meditation room, then shut the door behind her. “I’ve had some time to think. I know everything you did was because you loved him as much as I do. The archon incident wasn’t your fault, and the dehorning was simply you doing what you had to do. I didn’t want to accept it at the time, but you were right. There was no way around it.”
“I know but… I just don’t feel right about him taking the blame for me,” replied Seeker.
“That wasn’t your fault either,” said Zamara. “Before the trial, he made it very clear he wanted me to do what I could to ease your sentence. I didn’t listen. Instead I told him that you had to be punished for your actions. That’s why he made the appeal to have a jury of impartial matriarchs. I assumed he would try to confess, but I knew you wouldn't allow him to take the fall for you. What I didn’t count on was the control he had established over you.”
“I tried to fight him, I really did! But he was trained as a Preserver, I didn’t really stand much of a chance,” said Seeker.
“I know. But if I had just listened to him, if I had just told him what he wanted to hear; that I would have shown you some leniency, then he wouldn’t have felt compelled to do what he did.” Zamara sighed deeply before continuing. “He loved you Seeker. Had I been willing to listen, this entire disaster could have been avoided, or at least been scaled down. I… apologize to you.” That was the last thing Seeker was expecting to hear. “That said, your duty as Sovereign’s personal shadow is over now, you may return to your family on Shakuras.”
“Supreme Matriarch… I can’t do that. Service to the Dark Order is an eternal commitment,” argued Seeker.
“Unless you become someone’s personal Shadow,” countered Zamara. “In that case, you’re to protect them with your life, and end your life alongside theirs should you fail. You didn’t fail, so your duty to him is over."
“But he’s was exiled. The law doesn’t really cover this situation. If it’s a Matriarch or a Templar that gets exiled, I usually just project their replacement but… he has no replacement,” said Seeker.
“True. This is a rather unusual circumstance. I suppose I must assign you to a new assignment then,” said Zamara. “Go back to your family. Keep them safe.”
“I’m going home?” said Seeker. “But the Dark Order won’t allow for this.”
“I’m giving you this assignment personally. Only I can recall you. Just go home Seeker. Go home and don’t ever let me see you again,” demanded Zamara.
Seeker realized what she was doing. “I see. Well then… you’ll never see me again. Unless you call for me of course.”
Seeker turned around and began to make her way for the exit when Zamara spoke again. “I want you to know that I don’t hate you.”
Seeker didn’t turn around, but she did have to ask. “Then why can’t you stand to look at me?”
There was a silence for a moment before Zamara could answer. “Because I can’t be thinking about Sovereign every day. I still need to lead my people. This scandal will blow over but… I’ll never be able to put Sovereign out of my mind if I see you. You’re what could have been, what was supposed to be. You would have been like a daughter to me Seeker. Instead you’re a…”
“A reminder,” finished Seeker. She turned around to find Zamara was crying. “What would have happened had an honest testimony been given?”
“I never thought of that. As I said, I had no intention of going easy on you,” she admitted. “But now that you ask, I would like to think the two of you would have been sent back to Shakuras together to run your parents farm. You don’t need horns for that.” Even though she was crying, a smile crept its way onto Zamara’s face as she contemplated the possibility.
Seeker turned around and walked out of the meditation chamber. As she left the room, she thought on Zamara’s words. What could have been…
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CHAPTER 32 IS THE NEW CHAPTER. READ THAT ONE.
On a side note, a new chapter is out for Not So Perfect Childhood.
http://www.fimfiction.net/story/125386/a-not-so-perfect-childhood
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How?
You're only referring to sad and loving emotions right? Because some Protoss seem to be able to get very, very angry. (Like Zealots)
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It's not that protoss can't show emotions, they had a the bloodiest civil war in galactic history due to their uncontrollable emotions. But in the books Zamara is shown to be almost incapable of showing any strong emotions. The other protoss around her are shown to be just as emotional as humans are, but her heightened connection with the Khala always kept her emotions in check. She was basically a Vulcan. I can't say for sure, because I don't even blizz knows for sure, but it seems a Preserver's heightened connection with the Khala is what Prevents them from experiencing any deep emotions. Like why Sovereign was unable to recognize his feelings towards Seeker until she severed his link.
Of course Zamara is no longer in her Preserver body, and she is no longer a Preserver either, so I went with the direction that her new body can experience deep emotion. I hope I explained that she could simply link to the Khala if she wanted to and simply act like she never even knew Sovereign, but I went with the angle that in her current state that wasn't what she wanted yet. I can't imagine any mother being too quick to erase all empathy they had for a child, biological or not.
I was hoping at this point in the story it was clear that Preservers linked to the Khala don't experience deep emotions, but I put something in the authors notes to make it more clear.
In truth, the lore is very inconsistent on these things because there are multiple writing doing whatever they want, often contradicting the game, each other, and themselves. For example protoss can supposedly teleport to safety if near death, and Zamara's ship did teleport, but for some reason the entire crew conveniently forgets about the emergency teleport... in every single story. Though to be frank, the emergency teleport would ruin a lot of lore, which is why official writers don't awknowledge it, and neither will I. That said, nothing I write will ever be completely consistent because the actual lore isn't consistent. But I am trying to be consistent with myself at least, so I choose one direction from the lore and just go with that.
Okay, Sovereign is officially not as big of a moron than I thought he was.