Why homosexuality is just awesome. · 11:54pm
Your Antagonist here and I don't know why I wrote this,
You know what really cracks me up? Homophobes and anti-gay activists really crack me up. Even though the world is subject and succumbing to change these particular groups of people stand firm on their stance that homosexuality is wrong and gays shouldn't be allowed to do certain things such as get married or... stuff... and things. I wonder if from time to time conservative men still entertain the idea that a gang of rampant gay men will corner them in an alleyway and have their way with them. But all in all, I just find the whole thing funny. People are so busy looking at the corruption of 'morality' and the word of the bible that they fail to see the wealth of positives to homosexuality, just sitting there like a pile of platinum chains. Well, Your Antagonist saw the pile, but he saw it through old-school Red and Blue 3D glasses while looking at it from a 37 degree angle, so his views might be just a little to the left of this universe.
1) More same-sex couples means what for single straight folks?
Well let's think about it for a second. Without going into specifics, in the world of heterosexual romance, men are competition for men when pursuing the heart a woman, right? Right. So obviously, the more men there are, the larger the market is for the woman. Now stop for a second. Let's turnabout this situation. What if, and this is just a crazy idea here, but what if some of those men started getting together with other men? Oh, I see what's happening but do you? That's right, the aforementioned market is drying up, shriveling like a slug kissed by salt. So, somewhere along the line, when the amount of men getting together with men reaches a certain point, guess what that means to the men who are still in pursuit of heterosexual romance? That's right, it means they have less competition when on the prowl for a female! ...but they'd still better watch out, that homosexual variable and theoretical situation works both ways for both genders~~
2) When a homosexual man hits on you, it's like your all access pass to narcissism or at the least, higher self-esteem.
Now, certainly it could be a bit off-putting to have another man hit on you especially if all your life you've been raised to see negative connotations surrounding the same-sex attraction, but let's think about this with our brains slightly to the left. Now I'm not a 100% on this one, but I am 95.7% sure gay men have standards for beauty. They may not be the same standard, the standard standards if you will, but damn it all if they aren't standards. And typically if someone, be they man or woman, has decided you meet their standards and offers a compliment or some... companionship;D, that typically means you have met some standard of beauty. Call me crazy, but typically gay men have pretty good taste in...c'mon, you know this one... men. Now, who else do we know has a taste for men? ... you're really not even going to try and answer this are you? Women... well women who are interested in men anyway. So, if we look at two halves of a single whole we get this: a straight man receiving an attraction-charged compliment from another man means that he fits a standard of beauty that shares a common ground with those of women, therefore he must be attractive or at least marketable to some demographic of women. So if a member of the opposite sex ever hits on you, don't be down. Perk up, you're attractive! Now strut what you got!
3) Same-sex weddings equal economic stimulus! ... to some degree
Really, really think about this. The wedding industry is big. It will never be small. Because as long as Sue and Joe wish to wed, then they shall belt out copious amounts of dollars to do it big, if they so choose to do it big, because sometimes people tend to do it small. Now then let's look at the situation here: if they do it big, they will use the services of several companies for different aspects of the wedding. Catering, the wedding cake, floral arrangements, music, dressmaking, venues for the after party, so on, and so on. Now at the moment, since same sex marriage isn't legalized, in the US anyway, one could make the jump in logic and say that there won't be too many ceremonies for something a portion of the populace can't do. How large is that portion? No one knows for sure. Some theorize it's 3.5 percent of the population, others say it's 1.7% , but one thing is for sure: whatever the percent is, it's sure a lot higher than zero, and by not harvesting that number that isn't zero, we are ignoring a financial resource in a time where we as Americans have no excuse to do so. It's certainly not the thing to get us out of our economic rut, but it's a gateway and I'm sure the aforementioned business would appreciate it.
4) In my mind, gay men are like superheroes, because who's going to rob them?
There is no real purpose or backing for this section as it only applies to a set demographic of same-sex couples, but I really needed an excuse to use the metaphor "Batman and Superman walking down the street holding eachother's dicks" and that's exactly what I'm going to do. Now I like to think of the stereotypical, active male-male couple when I think of same-sex relationships, and since I'm not all there in the head I like to imagine them in everyday situations: grocery shopping while flexing their well-toned biceps, jogging together while beads of sweat roll gently off their rock hard abs, getting mugged, kangaroo wrestl-- did I say getting mugged? Yeah, getting mugged. First of all to even think about robbing the aforementioned couple is like watching Batman and Superman walking down the street holding eachother's dicks-- yessss....-- and thinking to yourself, I can take them, because, no you fucking can't... unless you have a gun and some kryptonite. But even still, a robber wouldn't single them out as targets, because they don't look easy and I don't even know where I'm going with this one because I just wanted to use that metaphor.
Anyhow that concludes this hopefully entertaining peek into my mind. If you were expecting anything story wise, I should have something pretty soon. It's the epitome of all of my writer's block, and I don't expect it to be good, but what it isn't is the story I was working on last time. I'll finish that one on a later date.