The Lone Wanderer tries to find out what the hell is wrong with him,  in Wanderer's Diary: Week Twenty Six.

This time: Idiots, mutations, and giant ants.

(Fanfiction.net version.)

NO I DON'T KNOW WHERE THE NEXT CHAPTER OF HUMAN IS. GO AWAY. I apologise. That was rude. It's coming. Eventually. I don't know when. I may need to get a ghostwriter for this chapter, because it's bugging me and I'm getting nowhere.

Wanderer's Diary:

The Lone Wanderer embarks on even more zany adventures,  in Wanderer's Diary: Week Twenty Four.

This week: Cultists, conmen, and cut-throat killers.

(Fanfiction.net version.)

Story updates:

So, last time I made a blog, two weeks ago, I said that Human and Shades of Grey would both update soon. To my credit, Shades did update, and after nearly half a year of it not updating, that's quite a promise I delivered. But alas, still no new Human chapter. For those wondering why this is, I'm sorry to say that real life just got in the way, and I've not had as much time to work on things. And what time I do have to work on things has been spread between multiple projects. I've endeavoured not to start working on anything new until I've updated all my major projects this time, so at least there won't be any new delays.

That said, I am still working on everything I said I was. Human's new chapter is about halfway or maybe three quarters to completion including editing, chapter 2 of both House of Chaos and The Doctor and the Master are half finished and waiting for me to get off my ass to finish them, chapter 2 of Van Helsing is done but requires heavy editing work, and with Draven done with chapter 6 of Shades at long last, I've even gotten closer to finishing Twilight, Season One, that story I've been teasing forever but still refuse to say anything about.

AND THEN THERE'S MY LATEST NEW IDEA WHICH IS A COLD WAR THEMED COMEDY WITH EQUESTRIA AND THIS NATION OF INTELLIGENT PENGUINS WHO—

NO. I'M SHOWING RESTRAINT NOW. LATER.

What I'm saying though is that updates are on their way. I'm not sure what I'll have for you all, but I'll at least have something by either this Monday or next Monday.

Ramblings:

So since this is a blog, why not inflict my stupid opinions on the world while I'm at it?

-Looking at the plot synopsis for Equestria Girls and having since learned that it's a movie, not a spin-off TV show, this might very well be canon. What's more, it's not humanised versions of the canon characters we're seeing in promotional artwork. All of them but Twilight are just eerily similar looking humanoid creatures. I'm okay with all of this, and in fact, it's actually got my hopes up just a little bit. I was never one of the doomsayers, but I'd be lying if I said I was looking forward to this before. And the fact that this ties into the Crystal Empire gives me hope that they never brought back Sombra after his two parter and developed him more because they were saving him for this. Yes, I know that's probably bullshit and I'm just being stupidly optimistic, but shut up and let me dream, okay?

-I saw this banner on Equestria Daily, and it really makes me want to see an amalgam crossover with Metal Gear Rising, even though I know it'd likely be terrible if it was written, because 90% of everything is crap and the good Metal Gear crossover has already been written.

-I'm editing for a new story that'll be coming out soon. It'll be good. Watch for it.

-Draven and Spiffy convinced me to get Skype, and fuck them for doing so because I never actually accomplish anything while on call with them. And no, Garion, you can't have my Skype contact. Not unless you sub tonight.

-Doctor Who season seven is still going on, and I love it. Journey to the Centre of the TARDIS was so cool, and Neil Gaiman's episode is still to come.

-Speaking of things I love, Dexter's final season is coming soon. Are you guys excited? Because I am.

-Iron Man 3 was also pretty decent and I recommend it.

-The 3D remake of Citizen Kane wasn't so good, and I find the casting of Nicholas Cage to be baffling. Then again, there was never any way they were going to make it better than the original, so I think they made bad on purpose and were going for irony points. And full score for that. 10/10. Would watch again.

-Does anyone else really fucking hate morons who get angry about what they THINK is going to happen in a movie or book or TV series when they don't know shit and are just basing all their assumptions on their own speculation? Because I do.

-And finally, a challenge to my watchers: Give me one good reason why the controllers for X-Box and Wii consoles need to be battery powered rather than recharging by temporarily plugging them into the console like the PS3 does? Because the PS3 is the only console that does that, it's so much more convenient, so much less costly, and there must be a damn good reason why no-one else does it, but I can't for the life of me think of what that reason is.

That's all for now, I think. I'll be back to you with whatever other crap I have to say sometime in the near future.

Peace.

The Lone Wanderer seeks an end to the wasteland misery, in Wanderer's Diary: Week Twenty Four.

This week: In-fighting, rebirths, and Oasis.

(Fanfiction.net version.)

In unrelated news, Human and Shades of Grey will both update soon. Keep an eye out.

So, I've just been watching some old Doctor Who serials from 1963, the original first season, and let me tell you right now, that show was fucking hardcore even then. This one I just got done watching, The Aztecs, has human sacrifices, has the villain winning, and possibly my favourite part, it has Ian Chesterton, (geography science schoolteacher and one of the Doctor's first companions), get into a sword fight with the leader of the Aztec army and he just beats the shit out of him. Ian throws him off a fucking building, and he dies. I mean, I was expecting 1960s family television to be pretty tame by today's standards, but goddamn.

EDIT: Vid related.

Announcing my latest two non-pony stories for those of you that follow them!

First, I present to you, Vault Dweller's Log! A story following the Vault Dweller on his adventure through the original Fallout 1, that I recently had the... pleasure, of playing. It's in continuity with Wanderer's Diary, though without any real obvious connections, and just like that story it's a comedy, though unlike Diary it's more focused on the adventure and character side of it and the comedy is secondary, whereas in Diary it's the other way around. Log is also a oneshot, so you can read it all in one go. A Fanfiction.net version is also available for those that would rather not have to use Google docs.

Secondly, I present the prologue to The Doctor and the Master! This one is a Fallout and Doctor Who crossover. Yes, you heard me right. It needed to be done. I searched the internet in vain for a good crossover fic of these two franchises. There were a few decent mods for 3 and Vegas, but a mod is not a fic. I could not let this stand any longer, so I wrote it myself. It stars the Tenth Doctor, post series four, and is in continuity with my other two Fallout stories. Primarily it takes place in the Fallout 1 era, so you can think of Vault Dweller's Log as a companion piece to this story. Again, a Fanfiction.net version is there for those that prefer that.

I don't though. Fanfiction.net sucks, at least to upload stories on. I could write a blog six times the size of this one on how shitty it is, but I'll save my breath and just say that Knighty, Poultron and the others aren't given nearly enough credit for how well they designed this site. And from now on, complaining about the Fimfiction layout in the comments is banned on my page and all my stories and blogs.

Garion. I see you about to write a complain in the comments to troll me. That last message includes you too. Stop it.

Updates on my other stories are coming. Sorry for my lateness with them. Please spare me.

With a quote from the guy! And it has stuff. Check it out, for reals.

In all seriousness, big thanks to my pre-reader for helping get this on Equestria Daily. And also for helping me fix what few mistakes still lingered, and answering all my questions. I swear, I owe most of everything I know about proper grammar and the writing process to people like Air Pirate.

I swear I won't make a habit of blogging just to recommend stories, because I don't want to spam my watchers' feeds with notifications. I hate when that happens to me and I dislike being the cause of it, which is why I try to only blog when I have something insightful or relevant to say, (HAHAHAHAHAHA.)

This however is a special occasion, because The Best of All Possible Worlds just finished recently, and it's an incredible story. Brilliant characterisations, attention to detail, historical accuracy, intelligent discussion and story writing, and a lot of interesting concepts and ideas.

The basic premise of the story is that the famous philosopher Voltaire goes to Equestria, some centuries after Nightmare Moon but before the time of the main show, and he gets involved in Equestrian politics and changes the culture in a big way. It's very creative at times, and often funny as well. Not gut-bustingly hilarious, but it's got a lot of low key humour throughout that'll keep you entertained, and Voltaire himself is very well realised. And even if you know nothing about the real philosopher or his life, it's perfectly accessible too.

It's about as famous on this site as Human is, so it hardly needs me to plug it for views, but I'm thinking of you here, reader. You need to read this. It's an amazing experience, and if you're a follower of mine, chances are you like human stories at least a little bit, and I'm not exaggerating when I say that this is the best HIE story I've ever read, including my own and Shades. Go read it if you haven't already, and tell your friends about it too, because it's a good story and it deserves to be a fandom classic, (way more than My Little Dashie or Past Sins does.)

The Lone Wanderer continues his miserable yet hilarious existence in Wanderer's Diary: Week Twenty Three.

This week: Vault 101, rescue missions, and public spectacle.

In related news, Wanderer's Diary is now up in full on Fanfiction.net! This is mainly to serve the purpose of reaching a larger audience with this story. After all, while you guys are all great, this was written with Fallout fans in mind and only some of my followers happen to also be Fallout fans. This is primarily a pony site, after all. It's high time I hosted this story in a place where the kind of people it was written for might see it and like it. The docs version will remain up, of course. I'm just make sure this thing gets more exposure, since I've put so much time into it and all.

Vault Dweller's Log is also in progress and coming along nicely. Expect it soon. Along with my other super special surprise which isn't really a surprise anymore because I spoiled it in the comments of my last WD blog, so I'm just gonna come out and say that it's a Doctor Who and Fallout crossover in continuity with my other Fallout stories, because I've yet to see a decent crossover fic of those on the internet for some reason.

I'm excited, guise.

After carefully reading and re-reading the chapter I wrote, I found out why I was having so much trouble getting the next instalment of Human out. It's because it's shit and I don't care about it. So I went with the obvious solution, wiped the whole thing, and I'm starting it again from scratch. Fortunately in the day or so since I've done that, I've made more progress on it than the last several weeks combined. It'll still be a little while before the chapter comes, but it's on track again now at least.

Wanderer's Diary meanwhile will have another entry out on Monday, and I'm continuing work on several other projects as well. It'll be fun.

Also, quick poll question. What do you the readers want to see in future chapters of Human? I feel like I'm not doing enough shameless pandering.

I know it's best not to blog about every little thing that crosses my mind, unless I genuinely think it's worth it. So with that in mind, I like to make my blog posts as compilation updates. Think of it as like a monthly newsletter, if you will.

Wanderer's Diary:

The Lone Wanderer wakes up in the Capital Wasteland again and regrets doing so, in Wanderer's Diary: Weeks Twenty One and Twenty Two.

This time: Resurrection, whining, and a well deserved break.

And we're back, baby! WD has been on a sort of unofficial hiatus since the main game wrapped up, but we still have Broken Steel and some other DLC stuff to get through yet, and I wanted to take a break before we got to that bit. Not just because I could though, but because I wanted to devote the time to some related projects. TWO new related projects in fact!

The first one? A one shot prequel to Wanderer's Diary. The name? Vault Dweller's Log. And oh yes, it IS based on Fallout 1. It'll tell the whole story of that game in one long update, and you can expect it in less than a month's time. The other story? Well... That's a bit of a surprise...

Other stories:

Van Helsing's next chapter is about ready to go. However, it'll be a little bit before you see it yet for various reasons. An update is close at hand though, trust me.

Discord: House of Chaos isn't going to update yet. Right now, it's under review for submission to Equestria Daily, and the first chapter is undergoing some minor editing tweaks to help it to that end. Nothing you'll notice, trust me. It's just some hyphen and dash stuff. Real minor, like I said. My pre-reader is very helpful though, and once it goes up on EqD, then I'll get started in earnest on the second chapter.

Human is being updated. Slowly. The character of Satan is hard to write, and I'm finding myself rather troubled on how exactly to spring the revelation that he's really Celestia's uncle and has been in an abusive relationship with First for the past six hundred years. All issues I'm sure that most writers are familiar with. I'm kidding, by the way. About most of it.

And also, Draven is increasingly busy, which means all our collab projects are on hold aside from Shades, which he's really devoting all his available time to. I know it doesn't seem like it, but it's a fucking long chapter and needs a lot of work. This unfortunately means that we're not going to see Twilight, Season One until after the next chapter of Shades, which may still be a while. And that really sucks, because I was so excited about TS1. I'll get it out though. Eventually.

Fan Stuff:

I've been meaning to post these for a while, but I keep forgetting. A regular reader of mine, and I like to think friend as well, made this series of Saints Row 3 character creation models based off the humans from Human and Shades. Check it:

Lord Second. I don't even know what point in the story this version is from.

First, as he appeared in chapter eighteen.

Our good friend Hayato, AKA the Third, from Shades of Grey. This is Draven Eclipse approved.

And finally, the ever unsettling and enigmatic entity we know as Nathan Carson-Summers, the unofficial "Fourth."

These were all made by my man Armalite. If you'll go over to his user page, you'll also find he wrote a bunch of poems/short rap verses about both TotEG fics and several others you might know, so go check those out too. Give his stories a read while you're at it. Thanks, Armalite!

Question for my commenters:

I recently had the pleasure of speaking to a fan who explained his interest in Human by telling me how much he liked the metafiction concepts that it uses, and that it's interesting enough that he was even able to overlook the gruesomely dark parts that are scattered throughout the story, even though he usually didn't like the dark stuff.

Human uses those dark elements because it's a vital part of the setting as I see it. A lot of the humour is extremely twisted, perverse, and is itself quite dark at times. If I don't make the world itself dark along with it, then the dark humour would feel more out of place. However, I know it's not for everyone. Though I think it's fair to say that Human is more well known than a lot of fics on this site, I've never really considered it incredibly famous, and it's probably because of exactly that reason.

But I've also held conversations with fans before who followed the story for its darker elements and its actual storyline, and were distracted when the ludicrous humour deflated the gravity and seriousness of the rest of the setting. It made me think a bit. People follow my story for a lot of different reasons, it seems. I'd like to hear what yours are, as a reader. Are you here for the comedy? Is it the dark and twisted shit you like? The concept and metafiction elements? Or is it just the narrative and characters? I'd like to know, actually. I'm curious what aspect draws in the most people.

Answer in the comments below.