Band of Five Attributes by Florarena Crimsonflame
Tags:[crossover] [comedy] [alternate universe] [human] [random] [adventure]

Greetings and bienvenue.

First, to get something out of the way. I on a personal level avoid crossovers with anime or anything similar to anime. This is not because I hate them. It is because they tend to break my personal rules involving any crossover.

Rule 1: Is it believable (everyone in character)?

Rule 2: Is it interesting?

Now let get to the review.

Band of Five Attributes: A (Little Buster Q / MLP FIM crossover) Fiction

Let’s start with the stories description: “After the defeat of the cyborg YONEKO in the hidden hallways of Special Task Force HQ, five teenagers-- Rekka, Tenmei, Koto, Yuuki, and Nagare-- resume their carefree lives. Oh, how they needed this break! The Frontier Quartet, having been arrested, won't trouble anyone anymore with their human/object hybrids whose name all had the letter "Q" in them. Suddenly, the STF undertake a mission to rid a library of the pesky "Q" hybrid things, when one knocks 'em all out cold. When they wake up, there's a new scenario which seems to get taking used to....”

Ok the writer has my attention.

The Gist of the Story:

Five special teens go to Equestria and end up trying to save it.

The Mood:

It’s hard for me to get into the mood for these kinds of stories but the writer achieves it.

Within the first chapter we are introduced to a group of teenagers talking about a past event, the writer explains the event as well as describing what the teens look like. Then they head off to battle giant monsters. Which the giant monster is two monsters fighting each other and see the teens then merge to be a bigger monster. This new monster then sensed them flying into a building which knocks them out. Chapter 2 starts with them in Equestria…

See, the writer within the first chapter manages to tell use who everyone is, what they do, and how they got to Equestria but at fast pacing. We ask for exposition and the writer gives us it but at the cost of pacing.

It was a smooth reading. This writer clearly knows the material they are working with.
When I got to the end the mood (anime teen comedy/action with MLP FIM) did stay consistent. And the story idea is fascinating.

The Grammar:

The grammar was good although I had to look up a few words just to be sure.
I’d give it 4 out of 5 on grammar.

The Style:

The characters were written pretty well but I was a disappointed with how fast everything was going. The Dialog was fine but again I feel that it was rushed. So my major problem was the pacing.

However it does gain some points for not breaking my crossover rules.

What a reader would love in the story:

The action involving special teens coping with being in Equestria while also trying to save it from evil…anime video game style.

My rating for this story: 7 of 10

Honestly it’s a good read. It just wasn't for me

However all fiction can be improved and a little bird told me the writer will update the story in the future.

2640939 Hey, the re-write of this story has been completed recently. Could you check it out? (It's been forever...)