First off, I'd just like to apologize for accidentally spamming the thread box earlier... that was two horrible mis-clicks for me. Don't hate me. Stupid forum posting...

Ahem, moving on. Today, I've going to review a story that absolutely nabbed me from the get go.

"Time and Thoughts are Different, Twilight"
By SpitFlame

After awakening from a rather obscure sleep, Twilight finds that Ponyville is different. All the ponies are gone; the air is grey; there is no sound from any living creature.
Feeling grieved and disheartened, Twilight searches the new Ponyville in order to find clues—and tie them together to discover what happened to everypony; what happened to her friends.

Okay, come on. How is that NOT creative and interesting? Really. The second I read the above, I just HAD to read it. Alright. So, let's delve into this beast.

The story centers around Twilight Sparkle, everyone's (kind of) favorite pony as she wakes up one day--on the floor. Everypony is gone, the world is surrounded in a horrible and visually impairing fog. Just what went on here? Nobody knows! Spoo--OOOO--ooky!

Moving on, the story follows Twilight as she tries to put the pieces, as well as properly placed clues, together. The author's writing style is VERY unique. The sentences tend to be short, but that fact is nothing. The author likes to use words that tend to jump out of the page(computer screen), words that absolutely MAKE the atmosphere for me.

One thing that I love about this story, was the fact that I was constantly able to imagine the world that Twilight was in. The subtle reminders towards the fog, the description of a destroyed Ponyville, the description of Twilight's dip into paranoia. It's all spectacular. What's more, I had failed to find any real grammar mistakes.

Spoiler below, kinda

There was this one part, where Twilight Sparkle walks out of Ponyville. She keeps walking. Several hours later, she arrives... IN PONYVILLE. That's crazy. That part made me stop, and think. How was Twilight going to get out of this, if the fog wouldn't let her leave?

Speaking of this scene, it struck me as odd. It took Twilight only a few paragraphs to walk several hours through nothing but fog. It's strange, because more description was put into smaller things, such as Twilight's initial awakening. This could have been a great opportunity to follow one of my good tips. Get in Twilight's head! Sure, having Twilight walk for several hours would not have been fun to write out, but that's why you get in her head. Surely, walking on and on for hours would give her some time to think. What's she thinking about? Her best friends are gone with a blink of an eye, never to be seen again! She's all alone! Everything is in shambles! Get in her head, tell us what she's feeling a little bit more.

Also...there is only one thing in the story.

One thing that crushed me, and that was the ending.

I'm not going to spoil it, but I'm not going to be vague with my review. Tread carefully. The ending leaves little to no closure, and provides very little answers. Come on, author. The synopsis is a smorgasbord of questions not answered. The ending may only answer a select few. This is similar to holding a cookie up in front of someone, waving and dangling it. After a bunch of pleas, hops for it, and crying, you finally give them the cookie, only for them to find out that it's has freakin' raisin, not chocolate chips. WHO likes raisins? Lies and deceit I tell ya!

Also, the ending does what it's NOT supposed to do, and brings up more questions. If the ending is (Redacted), then how did (redacted) happen?

One more thing, Twilight's constant talking to herself got a little annoying to me after awhile. At certain points, it's perfectly acceptable. When she puts the pieces together, it's awesome that she talk to herself! To say this:

"This place is a mess—a pretty big one at that, which isn't normal. Pinkie!"

And this:

"Pinkie Pie, along with the Cakes, are nowhere to be found. And why are all these dresses laying on the floor? Rarity would never create such a mess. But then again, she's not in this room."

Uhm, we already knew she's not in the room. Kind of unnecessary to say, even if you were by yourself. Perhaps, this was on purpose and an example of Twilight's descent into a solitary madness. I could very well be wrong.

In the end, the story is well written. The idea itself is crazy addictive. There was very little for grammar mistakes(that I caught). I still gave this story an "enjoyable" rating. I still had a good time reading it, and it kept me guessing all the way through. I still recommend you read it. Thanks, author!

-Cyneryk

That ending was a bit... midn-boggling. I guess it was to show the solidarity of Twilight while in her condition, but... what about the gri(redacted)ns? Why would they do what they did? Ehh, it could also have been a plot improvisation to explain why Twilight was in the mental state that she was, without any actual meaning to it. Unfortunately.

3698519
Lo! I say to thee, my dear, generous reviewer: that thine will shalt beseech, adhered with many of others, I shalt dost the continuation of thy words, much to my tale.

Haha, yeah, thanks for the review. I'm flattered that you enjoyed my style.