"Hey Crit, there are ponies yelling for you outside." a cyan pegasus called out, towering over his roommate’s bed. The pegasus stallion sported a purple vest, with small, vertical black lines on its sides, with neat folds on the end of the neck. His mane and tail were a dark blue and sickly green, styled in a very unkempt and short fashion – just how he liked it. On his chin rested a small, slightly curved dark blue goatee. He was also wearing a pair of red sunglasses. His flank treasures a comedic and a tragic mask with speed lines as the background.
A grunt sounded outside the room. "Hyperactive, how many times have I told you to leave me alone whilst I sleep?" replied the tired pony on the bed, with a book in his hooves – glasses on his muzzle and a beret adorning his head - his disdained tone fought hand and hand with his black and grey coat. Crit shuffled out of his bed, and trotted to the bathroom to get ready, while Hyperactive calmly walked over to the window. He saw the excited faces of the ponies outside, anticipating the critic, but only getting his hyperactive brother.
"I guess he'll be out soon." He redundantly announced to the crowd . Sighing in disappointment, they dispersed into different directions, going back to what they were doing before. Hyperactive turned to his brother. "Okay, they're gone now, bro.” He walked off the window and out of his brother’s bedroom. “I got to leave. Want to meet up later?"
"Ugh, I don't know.” Crit replied with a subtle grunt. After a moment of thought he turned his attention back to Hyper. “How does 2:30 sound?" Hyper just shrugged, not really interested in what time he was ready, and flew off. Crit peeked out through the door, and gave a sigh of relief.
Seeing as his brother was out of the house he starting focusing on himself. Looking into his reflection, he sighed yet again, this time in slight frustration. His grey coat, and black and grey mane and tail were looking awfully dirty and disheveled. He decided that he needed to shave his black goatee, so he took off his black beret and glasses. His entire coat was left with bed hair and some dirt spots here and there. Critical hopped into the shower, and immediately started to wash his body.
After the quick shower, he used his magic to pick up a towel from the stand, wrapping it around his waist. Exiting the tub, he dried drying himself, being careful as to not accidently bump into his glasses. After doing so, he picked up his glasses and beret and put them on their respective places.
Then, he looked at the mirror.
"Dang, Over Critical, you sure are looking fine today!" Critical liked to talk to himself - a LOT. So much that it became almost like a habit – a bad habit. Exiting the bathroom, Crit soon found himself sitting on top of his bed. His kempt room didn't really need much more tidying, so he went over to his television. He started to look over a bunch of movies, Eventually, this bored the clean-freak, so his need for interest lead him to the door. Turning around, he saw pictures of him and Hyper as colts smiling, laughing, and just being colts. This memorial piece of art brought a tear into Crit's eyes.
He lowered the picture to pick up the next - it was a picture of him and the fashionista from across the streets. Ah, he and Rarity appreciated each other's company, very much, to the point where they started dating.
He could still remember the day. As a matter of fact, he started to feel lonely due to that photo. Over Critical magically opened his door, and began trotting to the Carousel Boutique.
There, he knocked on the door, to be greeted by Rarity's little sister.
Upon seeing that it was her big sister’s spouse she happily grinned. "Hi Critical!" the little filly’s voice squeaked out, making Over Critical mentally d’aw from the sheer cuteness.
Critical’s smile matched hers. "Hi Sweetie Belle, is Rarity home?"
"Yeah, she is. Do you want to come in!?"
"Gladly." Stepping aside, Sweetie Belle let Critical inside the boutique. He proceeded into the building, and walked around the boutique. He saw Rarity, on the center of the room, making a dress, as usual. Once Rarity acknowledged his presence, she bounced over to him. She embraced him with a welcoming smile that enlightened the whole room.
"Oh good, Critical, you’re here!"
"Hi Rarity, how have you been?"
"Good, darling." For a brief moment, Rarity and Critical beamed into each other's eyes. Sweetie Belle snickered, but she soon snapped the two back to reality.
"So, uh, what have you been doing?" Critical asked, trying to change the subject.
"I've been making you a new hat. It is absolutely divine!" Critical could see a glimmer in her eyes as she said that. She used her magic to give him a large hat with a purple plume. Critical stared at the hat with the stink eye, then he stared back at the snowflake unicorn in front of him. She was batting her eyes, expecting the grey stallion to accept it. The adorableness reached down to his heart, enough to make him take off his hat and put on hers.
"So, Rarity, what's wrong with my hat?" Over Critical knew what this was all about, but he still needed to know what is her problem with his hat, that he loved.
"The ridges are so bland, the color is so dull, and the shape is so unoriginal! I had to make desperate measures, darling!" stated the posh pony.
"But THAT is why I love it!" blurted Critical. He embraced the unicorn, quickly swiping his hat without her noticing, and dashed out the door, without even, saying goodbye.
Quickly, without knowing where he was going, he galloped across town, in which he stopped in front of a theatrical studio. His curiosity got the better of him, so he stepped inside the building.
Right off the bat, Over Critical noticed his brother, who was shouting at another pony for something that he couldn’t understand. Critical got a seat and watched the show. Once the director called cut, he went up there and told Hyper to leave. Disappointingly, Hyperactive fled the stage, and other actors went up and did the same scene. Critical got up and left before Hyper noticed. Over Critical started off to his house, but he needed to get some supplies. He went over to some vendors for food. He trotted to Twilight Sparkle's tree for a book. After leaving Twilight's, walking down Ponyville, and getting to his house, he put in a movie to review. Over Critical is known for doing this, and todays topic was HighLandPony: The Source. After a few long hours, the movie bored the unicorn. At the same time, Crit's stomach bellowed out a clap of thunder. Over Critical turned around and saw that is was 2:25. Remembering that he was going to hang with Hyper, Critical left the house and went out for some food. Hyper was already there, and he greeted him with an idiotic laugh.
"So, Crit, how is your love, dude?" He burst out laughing. Critical grimaced by what he said. He HATED when his brother asked about his love life.
"Hi Hyper." Crit silently wished death upon him, before ordering a cupcake. They quietly ate their treats, not speaking to one another, since they both like it that way, when the pink pleasurable princess of pony parties came up to them.
"HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII PEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Pinkie yelled out, causing everypony, with the exception of Hyper, to cover their ears.
"HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII PPPPPPPPPPPPPPIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNKKKKKKKKKKKKIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEE, what do ya want?!"
"IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII DDDDDDDDDDOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNN'TTTTTTT NNNNNNEEEEEEEEDDDDDDD AAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNYYYTTTTTTTHHHHHHHIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGG! HEY, I JUST CALLED YOU PER!" Pinkie Pie's obnoxious yelling broke the glass windows and other assortments in the nearby area, infuriating lots of ponies near them. Hyper, noticing his glasses were broken, pulled out his other shades, and put them on.
"Can you two be quiet for a moment?" spoke the responsible pony.
"Quiet?" Pinkie's puzzlement made Critical quite worried - she didn’t know what it meant, although it was familiar to her.
"You know, not loud." Crit stated the last two words slowly. Pinkie nodded, but, secretly, she still didn’t understand. Then, Rarity entered Sugarcube Corner. Pinkie waved at Rarity towards the rest of the group.
“Oh hello, dear,” Crit stood up, acknowledged the unicorn and motioned her to a seat. Hyperactive also stood, but instead of acknowledging her, he bowed to the mare that his brother loved so much.
“I’d love to stay and chat, but I got to get back to my audition…” Hyper stopped in his tracks as he thought back to his audition. “Hey, Pinkie, in the play, there is a town crier that yells out everything that’s happened or is happening. I figured you could play that part. All you have to do is ring a bell and yell news. The guy who auditioned is okay, but it’s the role you were born to play. So, want to come and have some fun?” Pinkie jumped wildly at the idea, and run off to tell the Cakes.
They allowed her and told her to break a hoof. With that, Pinkie and Hyper bounced away, leaving Rarity and Critcal alone in their table. They sat and talked for a while and then planned the wedding out some more. Their wedding was only a month away from today, and Rarity was so happy... and so was Critical. He joked about finally being out of the house and away from Hyper. Rarity giggled cutely, and agreed at how much different the two were. As they ate and chatted, thunder clapped outside of the candy shop.
“Wait, didn't the pegasi say that it was supposed to be dry today?” Rarity pondered perceptibly.
"Maybe the pegasi forgot?" was the only thing that Critical could come up with.
Critical paid for the food, like a gentlestallion that he was, and stayed behind with Rarity. Outside, there were a dark red cloud overhead and around it were the white clouds that showed up earlier. They both watched as the pegasi tried to fix it. Critical and Rarity galloped to the theatrical studio, and they saw Hyper and Pinkie standing outside, talking to Rainbow Dash.
“Rainbow Dash, what is happening?” Rarity asked frantically towards the confused pegasus.
“I don’t know, we can’t break the clouds. We keep trying and trying, but they bounce us back.” Rainbow was just as worried as any other pony. Rainbow started to think about the cotton candy clouds from when Discord was there, but none of them were pink… and it wasn’t raining chocolate.
“Yo bro, what the hell is that?” Hyper pointed his hoof at a glowing circle in the sky, which scared Critcal. The circle descended from the heavens and around the two brothers, scaring them even more. Once they were inside the ring, it rose. At that point, Princess Celestia, from Canterlot, came down to Ponyville. She gasped as if she had seen a ghost.
“Get away from that circle you two, or something-.” Her warning fell on deaf ears as everything around them turned black, expect for the blood red circle on their hooves.
“Hyperactive and Over Critical hold a certain bond.” A mysterious voice, unseen by the two, spoke to them while they were in the circle. “You two will fight for the prize.” The brothers were now petrified and confused by the power of the circle as it grew brighter. “Now become one with each other and form the bound that will win your battles.” The voice continued, and then once it said its last words, the brothers were moved deeper into the circle. They were now lost in a field of psyche. Hyper, then, felt a surge of power, and so did Over Critical. They were both lifted into the air, and then they were thrown out of the circle.
“What the hell… what just happened?” Hyperactive moaned in pain, and started shuffling to get out of the invisible grip. On the other end, Critical was too busy adding two and two together to hear his brother.
“You two have been chosen… I’m sorry, I was too late.” Celestia looked downtrodden at this. She apologized to the brothers for a reason that the two stallions couldn’t figure out.
“Chosen, for what?” Critical finally queried. He needed answers for everything that has happened.
“The war… the winner receives their wish… but to be chosen, a bond must be presented to them.” Celestia said.
“Wait, a bond? Would brotherhood count?” Hyper looked at Celestia, who just nodded. The brothers looked towards each other and started to ask more questions.
“Is there anything else we need to know?” Critical looked towards Celestia, who only nodded slightly.
“Luna and I compete in the end this year, and before she was corrupted, we competed then too.” Celestia hinted that all she knows is what happens and not why. “The other contestants haven’t been decided, but you two still need to avoid others unless you know you can trust them. Also, look for the mark on your bodies. When you do, hide that mark to mask your identity immediately, because others will have different marks, and if they see yours, they will attack, no matter what.” From what Celestia said, Critical inferred that the symbol on his back and on Hyper’s is the mark of the competition. While thinking, Critical noticed his brother swaying and looking ill.
“Are you oka-" Before Critical could finish his sentence he began to feel ill. They both fell into a pit of unconsciousness, scaring everypony on the spot.
“Critical!?” Rarity screamed to her fiancée, using her magic to catch him in mid-air.
“Hyper!?” Pinkie caught him before he hit the ground.
“The surge must have exhausted them. All of you don’t need to worry though; they will be better in the morning.” The Princess then departed the scene in a flash of light, leaving the girls carrying the two unconscious brothers to their home, and then going their separate ways. Even in their state, the brothers thought that all of this would blow over quickly, but they were sorely mistaken.
The morning was still and noiseless. Hyperactive and Over Critical were lying in their respective beds tired from the ordeal that they went through.
“UGHHH what the…” Hyper shuffled up out of his bed. He stretched out his body and groggily moved towards the bathroom. He got all prepared for the day. Then when putting on his purple vest he noticed a mark on his back. “What the hell, did I get a tat’?” Hyper ran his hoof over the mark and winced in pain. He galloped towards Critical’s room and then tried to break down the door.
“I’ve locked the door and put a chair to stop you. Keep trying Hyper.” Critical scoffed and went back to sleep. Hyper rammed the door three more times and then yells at the top of his lungs.
“OPEN THE GODDAMN DOOR!!” Hyper screamed and rammed. Hyper cracked the door which made Critical jump up and looked worried.
“WHAT THE HELL?” Critical looked upset.
“Really, you’re yelling at me?” Hyper looked at Critical as Critical shrugged and fixed the door with his magic. “OH yeah, look.” Critical examined the markings on the back of his rambunctious brother.
“When did you get a tattoo?” Critical asked with confusion.
“I know right, did we go out last night?” Hyper asked.
“No.” Critical answered. “Look let’s just found out where you-.”
“WE!” Hyper pointed to the mark on the back of his brother.
“Wait… I remember that voice said that this marked the “competitors” whatever that means.” Critical explained.
“So, what should we do?” Hyper looked confused.
“Let’s just hide the mark under a cape okay.” Critical grabbed his brother and dragged him out the door.
“Wait didn’t you want to hide it?” Hyper asked.
“…yes, but if I wear something that Rarity doesn’t like she’ll yell at me and make me try on hundreds of large hats okay.” Critical looks embarrassed and Hyper laughs out loud. When walking, Hyper starts picking up pace and bumps into two mares.
“Sorry I wasn’t looking, you mares okay?” Hyper lends a hoof as Critical approaches to help, but is pushed off by one of the mares.
“I’m…okay.” The colorful mare said. She has a multi colored mane and tail, with a white coat. She had a cutie mark that shows a rainbow being made. “I’m Colorlove; it’s nice to meet you.” Colorlove lit up and looked at Hyper. “What is that mark on your back?” At the mention of the word the other mare bolted and grabbed Colorlove and galloped off.
“That was rude.” Critical exclaimed and dragged Hyper off. Hyper understood that his brother was really saying “I told you that would happen.” Hyper instead shrugged and followed his brother to the boutique.
“Why did you drag me off, we were talking with them?” Colorlove and the other mare are talking while they trot off on the road.
“I told you, you have to be more careful, they could’ve killed you.” The other mare defensively lectures.
“But…sorry Potion Note.” Potion Note smiles as the two mare walk towards Sugarcube Corner. Potion Note has a dark blue coat and a neon green mane and tail. Her cutie mark is a half note with a cauldron and a green potion inside it.
As the two walked into Sugarcube Corner, they were greeted by a familiar face.
“Good morning, Colorlove.” Pinkie was there to greet the people who walked in, she had a little name tag on that said “My name is Pinkie Pie” and looked really happy.
“Wait, why are you greeting people, Pinkie? Shouldn’t you be cooking?” Colorlove asked the overjoyed pink pony.
“Well… I kinda destroyed the kitchen and then made it worse when trying to clean up so the Cakes asked me to greet people today.” Pinkie didn’t care how her explanation sounded, she said it with pride almost like she wanted to destroy the kitchen and get greeter detail. Colorlove just giggled as Potion Note asked Pinkie if they could get a table. Pinkie directed them to a table and then went back to her post. The two watched Pinkie as she waited for the next victim… customer.
“So, what should we do after this Color?” Potion was still shaken up from the encounter with the brothers. Unlike the brothers, Potion and Color aren’t related, but they share a bond of dedication and will. They both knew one another before-hand, but weren’t the closest until the bond was made.
It was early in the morning, as Colorlove was trotting down the street. She saw Potion Note flying overhead. Just then a leaf fell onto Colorlove’s nose. She guessed it came from Potion Note and then took off to follow her. Colorlove flew towards Zecora’s thinking that is where Potion Note would be.
“Zecora, are you in here?” Colorlove knocked on the door and then Potion came crashing through. The leaf went up and then gently floated back down to Potion. Once she touched the leaf, a huge smile erupted from her face.
“Th..thanks.” With that Potion was off into the hut. Colorlove brushed herself off and flew back to her place. She was tired and decided that she should rest the day off, but then a knock was at the door and as Color answered the mysterious knock, she saw Potion.
“Oh, did you lose another herb?” Color asked with concern. The words “lose” and “another” angered Potion almost to the point of wanting to take Color out. But she calmed down and answered the concerned pegasus.
“No, I never apologized for bumping into you.” Color was awe struck. Potion came all the way her just to apologize about something Color forgot about as well. “I was in a rush, I’m sorry, are you okay?” Potion finished her apology and then Color just smiled and answered back.
“Yes, I’m fine. It was just a bump.” Potion sighed with relief. The two looked at each other and then Color spoke. “Do you want to come in and have a drink?” Potion looked confused and was about to deny the request, but Color grabbed her and brought her into her house to talk. The two talked for hours and became great friends. They were surprised at how they both had the same level of complete dedication till the very end of the task. Then as the two stood and Potion was on her way out, the circle appeared. The two mares were drawn into the circle and then they heard the voice.
“You two have will, and the bond had blossomed.” The two were confused, but couldn’t move. “The bond is made, watch for the mark, defeat the marked ones, or they’ll defeat you.” At that the circle disappeared and the surge came and overwhelmed the two. They were knocked unconscious.
Back at Sugarcube Corner, the two continue their conversation.
“Remember, the voice said “defeat the marked ones”, those two were marked. We need to hide the mark or else we will be in trouble.” Potion finished her lecture.
“But what if they wanted to help or could tell us more about these marks?” Color questioned. Potion sighed and waved the question off as unimportant. They continued eating their breakfast and continued in idol conversation. Then once done, they left for Rarity; she could give them something to cover their marks.
Once at the boutique, they knocked and the white unicorn answered back.
“Come in.” The two entered and looked for the unicorn, who wasn’t near the door. “Be right with you.” Then Rarity emerged from behind some curtains. She looked at the pegasi and was confused. “What do you two darlings need?” Potion explained the problem to Rarity and Rarity just smiled and nodded. “Oh, the markings, Hyperactive and Over Critical needed the same thing a few minutes ago. They ran with some simple capes before I could give them some better looking clothes. Alright come with me.” Rarity led the mares behind some screens and started putting clothes on them with her magic. In the end the two were given some large and frilly capes to wear. Also the capes were accompanied by two large matching hats that Rarity said were a “necessity”. The mares paid and thanked Rarity before departing.
“So, what now, Potion?” Color asked, as Potion tried to adjust herself in the cape.
“Let’s go collect herbs, if somepony does attack, I can whip up a smoke bomb so we can get out of there.” Color added the two things together and got that collecting herbs would be more fun than sitting around doing nothing. So the Colorlove and Potion Note went off into the Everfree Forest to collect herbs.
Potion Note walked Colorlove through the whole herb collection idea and what to do with what herbs to collect. Colorlove picked up on it fast and began picking herbs quick as a whip. Potion Note was doing the same as her friend and colleague, Zecora, came by also picking herbs.
“Working again Potion Note, but with a friend to lighten the tote.” Zecora spoke her to her friend softly and with complete sincerity.
“Hello, Zecora, this is Colorlove.” Colorlove greeted the zebra and got back to work.
“So what are you doing her, Zecora?” Colorlove asked.
“I am collecting herbs just as you, for a nice and tasty stew.” Zecora continued on her way and waved back to the two ponies as they continued working.
“Hey Potion, it is kinda late, so I’m going to go, okay?” Colorlove asked as she yawned.
“Okay, meet up tomorrow, normal place?” Potion asked.
“Yep, Sugarcube Corner. See you there, good night.” Colorlove was then on her way back home, and so was Potion Note. The two mares truly have made a bond, and Potion Note was happy to be Colorlove’s friend.
I want to thank everypony that sent in an OC. This is just the first two I’ve introduced. Don’t worry; I’m trying to use as many ponies as I can. If you have an OC and haven’t sent it in, I’ll give a recap on what everypony needs to tell me. Name, Type, Gender, Attitude, Cutie mark, Color (coat), Color (Mane and Tail), additional things are up to you. I’ll post the person’s name of who the OC I use is. Today we have two, For Colorlove- Thank bigMAREmac. Finally, For Potion Note- Thank B_Bubble132. All together now… Thank you. Don’t worry everypony; the plot will bring your OC’s into existence.
HELLLOOOO EVERYPONY, its me loopertooper? As you can tell my grammar is the best? So i really DON”T need a proofreader or editor. …… But if U wisH to challenge my grammar, please send I an message. And now back to the feature presentation, /)
A calm breeze welcomed the little ponies of Ponyville. The sleepy ponies awake to the breeze and bright sunshine to get to work. Hyper and Crit both cautiously and fearfully trot down the roads of Ponyville. They both wear capes to cover the marking so no one could tell they were marked by the “circle”.
“I look like a shady pony.” Hyper breaks the silence of the twos rhythmic stride.
“WE, idiot, we look like shady ponies.” Crit sighs as he responds to his brother’s obvious remark.
“No, you’re too slim to be a shady pony. I’m cool and buff enough to be a shady pony that might steal your saddlebag as you trot, unsuspecting to the crimes that have been commit-.”
“Shut up, please, you are going to drive me crazy with that dark nonsense.” Hyper stopped and looked confused. The two continued off in silence, each afraid that their comment will be shot down, like a young pegasus trying to fly.
While still walking, the two hear a rhythmic beat. They stop and look, but see nothing. The soil under their hooves rumbles with the unseen beat.
“What the pony feathers is that noise?” Crit looked towards his brother for an answer to his question. His brother is standing there bobbing his head. Crit droops, and sighs.
“Oh by Celestia that is a righteous beat.” Hyper screamed as loud as he could to let all know his thoughts.
“Righteous? No one ever described my beats as “righteous”.” A mysterious voice answers back to Hyper and Crit.
“Who is there?” Crit looked around and questioned the mysterious voice.
“Wow… you don’t know me?” The voice asked, with a melancholic tone. “Those words don’t fit for me.” The voice got increasingly angrier with every word.
“Do you know him?” Crit looked at Hyper to see if his brother knew the voice, completely ignoring the voice’s words.
“Nope, is he famous, like an actor?” Hyper shrugged.
“Hyperactive, if it was an actor, I would know who it is. I know all the greatest pony actors. You need to start thinking before you speak.” Crit fixed his hair as he spoke proudly of himself.
“Maybe it is the princess.” Hyper looked excited.
“…………” Crit stared at Hyper, angry and embarrassed. “You… you are a waste of a pony. Just go away.” Crit lectured.
“How do you know it isn’t the princess… masking her voice, ha I win.” Hyper gloated over his rebuttal.
“WHY IN CELESTIA’S NAME, WOULD THE PRINCESS HERSLEF MASK HER VOICE, YOU BLUNDERING IDIOT!” Crit now yelled the loudest he could muster to demoralize his brother.
“HEY, yo’ fools better listen up. I’m no princess, my name is B-.” The voice proudly started to state its name, but Hyper and Crit were still arguing.
“Hey it was an idea, didn’t have to yell.” Hyper defensively argued with his enraged brother.
“Sorry, but seriously, the voice is obviously a stallion by the tone.” Crit now just spoke in a dull roar.
“ORRRRR-.” Hyper was about to give a rebuttal to his brother’s gender guess, but Crit put his hoof up to silence his brother.
“Hey, it’s rude to ignore somebody.” The voice lectured the two as they argued.
“Hey it is also rude to interrupt other people’s conversation.” Hyper scolded.
“The nerve of someponies, didn’t you learn any manners?” Crit scolded the voice as the voice gradually became angrier.
“That is it that is it. You two are probably the two rudest stallions ever.”
“WE” Hyper defended.
“RUDE. Well yes Hyper is rude, but to call me rude is truly a miscalculation on your part.”
“Shut up.” Hyper starting laughing as the entire conversation became a joke.
“YOU TWO NEED TO DIE, NOW BY THE HOOF OF BLAZE ARLIS.” As he finished, the dark grey pegasus jumped out. He had a dark blue and green mane and tail. His cutie mark is a microphone on an orange cap.
“Wait, wait, wait… nope Blaze Arlis doesn’t ring any bells, you sure I should know you?”
“SHUT UP!” Blaze yelled. He landed and charged at the two brothers.
“WATCH OUT!” Crit turned to see Blaze charging at him. As Hyper yelled to Crit, the markings began to glow. “Huh?” Blaze stopped and backed off.
“Oh. Killing two birds with one stone.” Blaze smirked. Again he charge at Crit, still confused by the glowing.
“Don’t go near my BROTHER!” As Hyper yelled the markings got brighter. He lunged to save his brother. But he flew faster than he could, like he was shot out of Pinkie’s party cannon.
“WHAT THE-?” The speed of Hyper created a gust that launched Blaze back. “You two aren’t getting away from me!”
“I can’t leave you for a second, can I?” Another voice arose from the silence.
“I’m not a filly, Bronze!” Blaze yelled at the mysterious voice.
“No, just come out, we aren’t playing the “Who am I game” so no just come out NOW!” Bronze trotted out from the darkness. He is a brownish-grey unicorn with a dark brown mane and tail, and a donut for a cutie mark. He also wore a pair of reddish-brown glasses.
“Sorry to scare you two. Please Blaze and I will explain everything at Sugarcube Corner, please follow me.” Bronze spoke smoothly to the two.
“I’ll listen, sorry for overreacting.” Blaze looked down as he said his apology.
“Actually, may I ask one quick question?” Bronze looked towards Over Critical.
“Go ahead.” Critical looked at the kind stallion.
“Have you met anyponies that also had the markings?” Bronze looked very concerned when he asked the question.
“Yes, two mares, but they ran away.” Hyper was quick to answer the stallion.
“Two mares? I know them. Just come to Sugarcube Corner please, it is urgent.” Critical followed immediately behind Bronze. Hyper followed behind, he didn’t trust them, but trusted Critical with his life.
At Sugarcube Corner, Bronze guided the group in and towards an already occupied table.
“Hey, *gasp* you two.” A mare stood and dove at Hyper.
“Oh, come on why is everyone hitting me? Oh yeah these are the two. My name is Hyperactive the greatest actor in all of Ponyville. And this is my “grand” brother Over Critical, the posh guy who review pony movies and such.” The mare still on top of Hyper looked between the two. Everyone took a seat as Pinkie came over to help.
“…You two are playing without ME?! WELL HERE I COME!” Pinkie jumped up to land on the two.
“OH NOOOO PINKI-.” As Pinkie came down, Critical moved Potion Note out of Pinkie’s bomb. Hyper was unlucky enough to be the one who was trampled on. Pinkie’s hooves dug into Hyper.
“YAY, fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun, *GASP* FUN FUN FUN FUN FUN FUN FUN FUN FUN FUN FUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Pinkie screamed as she jumped every time she said fun. Bronze looked at Pinkie, who caught his gaze and understood to get off her playmate.
“No, just kill me, please. Hey, umm, oh yeah Blaze I DON’T KNOW YOU! KILL ME!” Hyper begged for death from the onslaught of Pinkie’s hooves. She smiled and helped up the dying Hyper.
“Oh, Hyper doesn’t mind, he is my lover, right honey?” Pinkie winked and blew a kiss towards Hyper and went back to the kitchen.
“You two are dating, Blue Bird?” Blaze insulted the crippled Hyper.
“NO, and you call me Blue Bird ONE MORE TIME, I’M GONNA BREAK EVERY BONE IN YOUR BODY, Ghosty.” Hyper smirked and Crit chuckled.
“GHOSTY, how is that an insult?” Blaze looked very confused as he tried to put together the “insult” by his adversary.
“Because no one knows and acknowledges ghosts, Ghosty.” Hyper smirked and tried sitting down, but failed to do so without injuring himself. Blaze looked straight at Hyper and started an epic stare off.
“G-.” Critical stopped Hyper from continuing the insulting contest. “But bro, he can’t win. PLEAS-.”
“Shut up and stop embarrassing the family you loud mouthed idiot. Drop it and listen.” Crit looked towards the two mares. “Now to formally introduce myself, I’m Over Critical, and you are?”
“Colorlove, and this is Potion Note. It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Over Critical.” Colorlove smiled as she introduced them to the group.
“Excellent, now everyone let’s all take Critical’s and Colorlove’s example and introduce ourselves. I’ll begin, I’m Bronze, I work here at Sugarcube Corner, also I’m partnered with Blaze.”
“Yo, I’m Blaze Arlis, First rapper in all of Equestria, hold your applause till the end.”
“Also known as Ghosty” Hyper exploded in laughter. Everypony looked at Hyper. “Oh, I’m Hyperactive, I’m an actor and I’m partnered with my brother, Over Critical.”
“I’m Potion Note, I’m Zecora’s prodigy. I make potions and I love to sing. Nice to meet you.
“I’m Colorlove, I love to draw and I’m partnered with Potion Note, who forgot to mention that.” Colorlove giggled with her words towards Potion Note. Potion blushed.
“Alright, now let’s all be completely honest with what we know about these, markings.”
“And abilities.” Hyper interrupted Bronze to put his two words in.
“Abilities?” Bronze looked intrigued.
“Yeah, when fighting Ghosty I moved at supersonic speeds.”
“How ‘bout we get back to that later.” Bronze kindly put. “Now, when the circle spoke to Blaze and I, it said that all with the mark must be quelled.”
“Ours said that a bond was created to win the battles.” Hyper added.
“Ours said that the bond can never be broken, for it symbolizes the trust in all of Equestria.” Colorlove gave the final information.
“Wait, trust of Equ… never mind I don’t care.” Hyper just gave up.
“Alright well the moral of me bringing all of us together was that we 6 should make a truce.” Bronze came forward with his idea.
“No, No, No there is no way in Discord’s chaos world that I’ll work with Ghosty, the rest of you I got no problem with, especially you two.” Hyper winked towards Potion and Colorlove who both giggled.
“Yeah, I’m not working with Blue Bird.” Blaze argued.
“STOP!!” Critical stood up. “According to what I can remember, Princess Celestia said that she and Luna competed before, so that means others could be experts. If they attack any of us when we are alone then the two will have no chance. We are all greenhorns to this, so the 6 of us WILL be an overall team, got it you two hooligans.”
“Thank you” Bronze shook hooves with Critical. “Now to get to know each other, let’s all go out with another ponies partner, okay?” Potion Note nudged Colorlove. Colorlove looked towards Bronze and whispered something to him. “Okay, Potion Note and I, Critical and Colorlove, and finally you two are together.”
“I’D RATHER DIE” The two spoke in unison.
“Hyper!” Crit looked at Hyper. Hyper sighed and agreed. “Colorlove, was it? What would you like to do?”
“Well, I had to do some shopping, but-.”
“Alright, that is fine. As a gentleman, I will help you buy whatever you need.” The two departed and then Potion and Bronze left after words.
“Time to finish this, Ghosty!”
“NO!” Hyper looked confused. Blaze explained about how he wants this truce to work out. “So what do you want to do, Blue Bird?”
“Well, up to you. We’ll do what you want to then we can go to the theater so I can make my rehearsal.”
“Well I got to meet up with Vinyl so I guess-. Wait follow me.”
Hyper and Blaze went out to the lake outside of Ponyville. The two sat at the edge of the lake.
“This is my inspiration.”
“Excuse me, what did ya’ say Blaze? What do you mean by “inspiration”?” Hyper looked confused.
“My inspiration for life. Look at the water, it sits and waits for anything to disrupt its sleep. Anypony can miss this perfect place. When life and work gets hard I come here and look towards the lake for the inner peace and solution to life’s problems. When I first met Bronze the circle appeared. After words, I came here and the water wouldn’t stay calm and sleep. Nothing was in the water or on it, but it kept rippling. It is a sign. We… aren’t gonna make it out.” Blaze looked downcast.
“I understand.” Blaze was flabbergasted. “This lake is the bond of Equestria, this lake is the emotions of people, and it is the future. Blaze, you’re saying that the lake wouldn’t stop rippling, but there was nothing obstructing its peace. Equestria is changing because of these markings, and it will end up rippling apart into destruction.”
“You really are deep, Hyper.”
“You too, Blaze.”
“Finally, you two compromise.” Bronze and Potion Note came out of the forest into the clearing.
“This was just to get us to agree, wasn’t it Broz?” Bronze shook his head.
“Nope, it just worked out that way.” Bronze smiled and asked the two to follow him.
“We talked to Colorlove and your brother, they will meet us at the Sugarcube Corner later, and then we will all go out to dinner, okay?” Potion Note was still behind Bronze.
At Rarity’s boutique, Colorlove and Over Critical were shopping for Colorlove’s clothes.
“Crit, this one look good?” Colorlove came out of the changing room in an artistic dress.
“That looks brilliant, darling.” Rarity came out and remarked on the beautiful dress on Colorlove. “Now, Ovy, come with me.” Crit followed his fiancée
“NOOOOOOOOO!!!” Crit yelled from behind a changing screen
“Umm, what is happening back there.” Colorlove looked confused and worried.
“Don’t worry andddd… there.” Rarity pushed Over Critical out with a large hat.
“Not again like I said, I like my hat, it isn’t eccentric.” Crit sighed and took off the hat.
“How about this one, Ovy?” Rarity put a top hat on Critical.
“I like my hat, it isn’t eccentric.” Crit just sat as Rarity kept running through hats.
“Okay this is the hat for you.” Rarity put a bowler hat on Critical.
“I like my hat, it isn’t eccentric.” Crit just sat as Rarity continues to throw hats on him.
“Okay, if you say that one more time, I will leave you, now here.” Rarity put a fedora with many accessories on it onto Crit. “Again, say it again, wedding off.”
“I don’t like this hat, it is too eccentric.” Crit smirked and grabbed his hat. “Welcome back old friend.”
“Oh, Over Critical, were going to be late to meet up with the others.” Colorlove stopped laughing long enough to inform Critical on the time.
“Okay, darling, we have to go. I’ll see you later okay.” Crit embraced Rarity.
“Okay, bye Ovy.” Rarity kissed Critical.
“There you are.” Potion ran over to Colorlove. “Ooo, I like the dress.”
“Thanks, Potion, how was your date with Bronze?”
“It wasn’t a date.” Potion blushed.
“Okay, so where are we going to go eat dinner?” Hyper asked.
“Here, I guess. Since we are here and all and I’m very hungry.” Bronze decided for the group.
After dinner, the people all separated and went their separate ways. They promised to keep a truce to survive the trial ahead of them.
FILLIES AND GENTLECOLTS, it is time for the *drumroll* APPRECIATION GAME (yay woohoo) Now HERE WE GO: Colorlove= bigMAREmac, Potion Note= B_Bubble132, Over Critical= Donceluzza(p.s. check out my bro’s fanfics they are AWSOME ), Hyperactive= ME (you rock, woohoo). AND NOW FOR OUR NEW COMERS: Blaze Arlis= BronyGC, And Bronze= epicdonus1123. ALL TOGETHER PONIES (KILL THEM WITH LOVE AND AFFECTION) THANK YOU.
P.S. I seriously need a proofreader if you would be willing to I WOULD LOVE YOU LONG TIME (insert twilight smile here) Also I thought I need an image but I suck at drawing (No one needs to see that) So If you want to draw it then again I WOULD LOVE YOU LONGER TIME (insert 2 twilight smiles here) The idea is just the Mane 6 of my story, Blaze, Crit, Hyper, Bronze, Potion, and Colorlove. If you do and need pictures, PM me and I’ll get back to you ASAPP (As Soon As Ponyly Possible) All right that is all.
The sun was covered by the clouds, creating a dark shadow that spanned across Ponyville. The darkness caused a sheet of black, so tiring, that ponies started to fall asleep. The spell also was cast on Critical, who was still lying in his bed. Hyper, already awake, was making breakfast for the two of them; he usually awakes his brother, but decided that today, Crit can sleep.
“Those ponies will betray us, why can’t Crit see that?” Hyper mumbled to himself, troubled by the events that occurred the other day. Meeting the other ponies and forming the “alliance” wasn't an easy feeling for Hyper. His gut told him to ditch them, but all these events racked the poor stallion’s mind. He distrusted the others, but no one would listen to him. “Maybe I should talk to Crit; he’ll understand, right?” Hyper questioned his resolve and tried to run through the conversation on his own. “Good morning, bro, hey, have you seen the backstabbers yet… No can’t say that. This isn’t good, Crit is blind to-.”
“What am I blind to, Hyper?” Crit emerged from the stairs, still groggy and drowsy, cutting Hyper off mid-question.
“Nothing, but can you really trust those other ponies?” Hyper looked concerned, but his brother didn’t hesitate for a second with his answer.
“No, but do we have any other choice?” Crit’s logic shot down Hyper’s plans to disband the truce that has been started between the six ponies. Crit quietly sits and eats with his brother. Both are locked in deep thought and both are concerned with the other. “I’m going to go for a walk; I’ll be back for lunch.” Crit hurriedly moved to the door and with his magic, opened and closed the door as he departed.
Hyper was still worried and was going to go insane over this intense conjecture. “No point in worrying, Crit's right, there is no other choice. I don’t want to die, and alone, we will die quickly.” Hyper retreated back to his room to relax. The day’s gloominess expanded Hyper’s worry. He had no work to take his mind off the subject, so he just watched television.
Bronze and Blaze were working in Sugarcube corner, cleaning, cooking, and basically any task the Cakes needed done. Bronze was waiting on a table so Pinkie could help in the kitchen.
“Blaze, can you ask the cooks for some blueberry muffins and chocolate cake?” Bronze’s kind words and gentle smile illuminated every word he spoke.
“WHY AM I DOING THIS?!” Blaze was trying his hardest to stay calm, but the pressure and constant need of people pushed him of wagon. “I’M A RAPPER, NOT A WAITOR!” Bronze sighed and thought about how to work his dilemma out.
“We will go into the square later and I’ll let you rap IF you help me now.” Blaze beamed with the promise that he could rap.
“Wait, you’ll LET me. I’m no filly, I don’t NEED permission.” Blaze, still being rebellious towards Bronze, shifted his body away from Bronze, trying to ignore everything he said.
“But if I don’t come with you, and somepony with the mark comes by, you’ll die.” Bronze smiled as Blaze slumped off to the kitchen. “Logic always wins.” Bronze laughed as the customers joined in the chuckle.
Colorlove sat and waited as the customers came into the Morning Daisy’s, the coffee shop she works at. She drew, when she had time, and was glad when no one came by, as it gave her more time to work on her art. A group of 4 ponies, 2 stallions and 2 mares, came in. Colorlove sighed as she put her art away, and trotted over to the group.
“Hello, what can I get you ponies?” Colorlove smiled as she greeted her customers.
“I’ll have a coffee and a bagel, thanks.” One of the mares quickly responded. One of the stallions simply agreed and asked for the same order. Colorlove smiled and nodded. The other stallion looked at Colorlove with a greedy smile, she knew what was coming.
“I’ll take you to dinner... and a coffee, thanks.” The stallion smiled and peered at Colorlove.
“He he, funny, haven’t heard that one yet.” Colorlove looked at the other mare who hadn’t ordered yet. She just simply asked for a coffee and smiled. “I’ll bring those out immediately, one second.” Colorlove then disappeared into the kitchen and grabbed the coffee and the bagels for the customers. As she came out of the kitchen, she saw that Potion Note had arrived and was standing in the doorway. “Oh, come in Potion. You know where, right?” Colorlove smiled, and Potion nodded to agree with her friend’s request. Then, Colorlove quickly gave the customers their order, and ran from the stallion, who was ready to ramble another pick up line.
“Umm, busy day, huh?” Potion sarcastically remarked at the empty coffee shop, except for the group of 4.
“Ha ha funny, Potion. Shouldn’t you be working?” Colorlove slumped and sat with her partner and placed a coffee mug in front of Potion, who nodded at the signal. “Or does potion making and singing get a sign off every day or so?” Colorlove’s sarcasm was blunt, which gave Potion a laugh.
“Nope just stopping by, and I was wondering can we meet later in the town square for some shopping?” Potion Note’s definition of shopping is usually ingredient shopping and other things for work, but Colorlove needed something to do, so she agreed and then proceeded to converse with the mare until the customers required her assistance.
“So, are we going on that date?” The stallion pushed the point that he started with his excellent joke.
“Nope, we aren’t; here is your coffee.” Colorlove smiled as she shot down the stallion. After refilling the coffee, Colorlove returned to her companion. “So, how is work, Potion?” As Colorlove asked the question, the other pegasus seemed distracted. Colorlove stared at Potion Note’s silent expression and then matched her glance to two ponies frolicking outside. “Do you want to play Potion?” Colorlove didn’t get a reply to her question, instead Potion stood and snapped out of her trance to say her goodbyes and remind Colorlove of the meet up.
“Sorry, I just remembered something I needed to do. Sorry, we can talk later, okay?” Potion looked worried, but Colorlove smiled and waved her friend off.
“Refill, please.” One of the customers yelled out.
“One second.” Colorlove replied and watched her friend exit, then went start to the kitchen to finish working her shift.
Over Critical found pleasure in taking quiet walks in the morning. He enjoyed his work, his friends and family, but all still weigh down and when he can walk silently alone, he feels that all the problems just float off. While he was walking, he heard a loud noise, as if something was about to hit him at a high velocity. He turned to see little Scootaloo riding her scooter with Applebloom as a passenger. The fillies’ direction wasn’t veering from ramming Crit. He moved out of the way, and watched as the two scooted by him. They both waved to him and smiled with ecstasy in their souls..
“Good morning, Over Critical!” The two greeted him in unison.
“Good morning you two.” Critical’s greeting held the fillies’ attention for too long as Scootaloo wasn’t looking at where she was going. “Watch out!” Crit exclaimed to get their attention. Scootaloo looked at the box they were about to collide with. Crit grabbed them with his magic, and lifted them and scooter from slamming into the box.
“Thanks so much, Critical! That could’ve been disastrous!” Scootaloo thanked very warmly.
“Be more careful next time, Scootaloo. At your speed, that collision would’ve dealt some serious damage to you, Applebloom, and your scooter! Also it would’ve destroyed the box, which is somepony’s property.” She looked down to the ground, which gave Critical the sign that she was truly sorry. He patted her head and lifted her spirits. After Scootaloo composed herself, she and Applebloom went off again.
“Nice save, Critical. That filly would’ve gone flying, for once. Ha, I’m a genius.” The voice applauded their joke and then flew down to greet Critical.
“Hello Rainbow Dash and thank you; I'm just trying to help.” Critical shook hooves with the pegasus.
“Did you hear my joke?” Rainbow was still exaggeratedly laughing from it, like it was the most hilarious thing on the planet.
“Yes, it was funny.” Critical smiled as he answered the pegasus. “Actually, I have a question; is it going to rain today, Rainbow?” Critical seemed concerned as the weather does shape how long his walk was going to last. Rainbow smiled and shook her head.
“Nope just cloudy today, Critical.” Rainbow seemed delighted with her answer. Then her expression changed suddenly, and her eyes wandered away from Crit’s, instead towards the mark. “Where did you get that tattoo? It looks so cool.” Rainbow was mesmerized by it.
“Oh, umm… I don’t know.” Crit shrugged and remembered that he never came up with a good reason to explain it. He mentally said to discuss with Hyper where they got them.
“I agree it is cool.” A mysterious voice appeared and examined the mark. “So, are you alone?” The voice sounded extremely interested in this.
“Who said that? And no he isn’t alone, I’m here.” Rainbow answered the voice with force and valor.
“How rude of me, just interrupting your conversation without introducing myself... my name is Dark Storm.” The pegasus came out of the dark and revealed himself to Rainbow and Critical. His black coat glimmered as he stretched his bat wings. Rainbow noticed the silver lines all over his body. His mane and tail are lined with black and silver on the inside; his red eyes are complimented with his reptilian pupils and sharply pointed teeth. Turning around, his cutie mark, resembling a dragon on a red background, started to move, as if it were alive. What caught Critical’s eye was the mark that contrasted the rest of the body; a white marking that looked like a tattoo. Upon seeing it, Critical prepared his escape. “Don’t think of running, you’ll never escape. Also, without your partner, you have no chance of survival.” Storm smirked and took to the sky. He flew high into the clouds, disappearing for a moment, and then came bulleting down towards Critical and Rainbow.
“Run!” Critical started galloping as fast as possible, and Rainbow followed him.
“HAHAHA, you’re like a mouse; running even though you know there is no chance of escape!” Storm continued close behind the two.
“We have to get Hyper! Rainbow, get Hyper, tell him to go to town square!” Rainbow didn’t ask a question, just nodded and took off towards him. Crit thought to himself that this pegasus was crazy, but this gave him the advantage. He's alone; he will run once Hyper is with him. Crit threw a crate at Storm using his magic. Storm laughed and dodged the crate. Crit took another crate and flung it at Storm. Storm dodged again, but Crit threw both crates at Storm again. Storm couldn’t dodge them both and keep his pace; Storm laughed harder.
“Is that the best you can do?” With those words, Storm’s mark lit up. Then Storm’s hooves burst into flames. Storm hit both crates and clenched his wings to his body. He plummeted and lost his pace, according to Crit’s plan. But two flaming crate were heading straight at him. He blinked to the right and dodged the crates. Once he saw the unicorn dodge, Storm drew his wings again and flew straight at Crit.
“Rainbow!” Rainbow appeared out the clouds with Hyper behind her.
“Rainbow filled me in, dude, we got this.” Hyper snickerly smirked and looked at Dark Storm. Storm stopped and began hovering, in which his smirk disappeared. He wasn’t an idiot; alone he is at a disadvantage. He thought as he hovered.
“Hyper don’t move, he will run. Together, we have the advantage.” Crit whispered to his anxious brother. Hyper simply nodded.
“So, this is your partner.” Storm looked at the two brothers. “Let us see how good you are.” Storm’s mark lit up again and his hooves burst into flames again. Hyper and Crit were worried now, and they both could tell that Storm was an expert and knew what he was doing.
“So, Blue Bird, you found yourself in a bit of a pickle?” Hyper and Crit were overjoyed to hear Blaze followed by Bronze. “We met the girls when they were shopping, then heard the noise. You two need help?” Blaze stood tall and moved next to Hyper as Bronze chuckled and stood next to Crit, followed by the girls.
“So Storm, think you can beat three teams all at once alone?” Critical smirked and stood ready for a battle. Storm’s flames were extinguished. He laughed and scanned the six ponies.
“I guess I got sloppy and walked into a trap. Next time, I won’t. Until then, goodbye greenhorns.” Storm bulleted off and laughed as he spoke. He was headed towards the Everfree forest.
“That was too close. Thank Celestia you guys showed up.” Crit smiled as he thanked the other ponies. Potion blushed as the rest laughed. Crit looked over to his brother, who looked at him with an expression that read “I see why we need them now, bro.” Crit laughed and then looked towards his comrades. “So I heard ponies were shopping? I’ll join you guys; Hyper, you in?” Crit looked towards his brother.
“Of course, bro.” Hyper smiled and broke out laughing. This caused the entire group to join in on the laughter. Then, all six ponies went towards the shops, all a little shaken up from the arrival of Dark Storm. They all knew that ponies like Dark Storm might come around; all they need though is each other, and they all might survive.
OOOOOO, interesting. HELLO EVERYPONY, loopertooper here for the thanks and acknowledgements. NOW, the new arrival, Dark Storm, was made by Hardcore Gamer59. And again the recurring ponies, Over Critical= Donceluzza, Potion Note= B_Bubble132, Colorlove= bigMAREmac, Bronze= epicdonus1123(MY NEW EDITOR *squee*), Blaze Arlis= BronyGC, and Hyperactive= loopertooper. THANK YOU ALL /)
The sun shining down on Critical weighed him as he traveled towards his house carrying a large duffel bag. He moved swiftly without hesitation.
“If Hyper isn’t home soon, I’m going to kill him with all my might" Cricial exclaims as he opens the door, seeing Hyper in the back yard. "STOP!" which stopped Hyper from going into a army stance. "Training time, speedy!" As Critical drops the duffel bag, a loud metallic clammer writhes from inside.
What's in the bag?" Hyper pondered.
"They're gifts from Smith." Then Critical began to open the duffel bag.
"Smith? Oh, the Blacksmith." Critcal seemed satisfied for his genius paronomasia, making an eerie smirk. "Hey, bro, you oka-" Without hesitation, the stainless sword was drawn two inches from Hyper's muzzle.
You need a stronger skill than speed; your power is speed, so I got some swords and other weapons to create combos we can use."
"..." Critical raised the sword and swung. Hyper blindly dodged, however getting scathed on his right hoof. Hyper grabbed the edge of the blade, and turned to his brother.
"I've got one set up; charge at me, then strafe right and left. Then, launch the target into the air, HIGH into the AIR. Then, pass them by, and DROP THEM HARD!" Critical's overly enthusiasm sent goosebumps down Hyper's back.
"What do I hit?" Critical levitated a rapier from the bag, cocked his head, and squared off with Hyper, whom already broke into an obnoxiously uproarious laughter. "YOU, I'll frickin' kill you!" Hyper, once again, rolled on the ground laughing.
"As a gentleman, I know how to wield a sword." Hyper, chuckling, picked up his blade in his mouth.
"Fine, ring it Crit." Hyper mumbled through the sword in his mouth. Hyper darted at Critical, cutting his mouth with every passing second. He swung the sword at Crit, whom simply parries out of his mouth. "......" Hyper slowly grasps his sword back into his mouth. Hyper took off in place. As he did so, his tattoo shone brightly.
"Good, you can control it. Now, use the combo on me, but don't me or hit me. Because you will fail, and get hurt, so I'll have to tend your wounds. And I can't do that, 'cause I'm tired." Hyper growled and darted. In Crit's perspective, his brorther became a blur. "COME ON!" Critical tauned his easily swayed brother. Hyper sped quickly towards Critical, strafing from left to right. Once he reached Critical, he lauched him into the sky, pretending that there is someone there.
"HAMMER DROP!" Hyper dropped into the ground, leaving a huge crater in their backyard.
"... WHAT THE HELL MAN?" Hyper laughed at his accomplishment; Critical couldn't help but gape at the large crater in his garden. His garden! Soon enough, though, he joined in the laugh. "Good job, I'm impress...?" Crit stopped motionless. "A shiver...come on!" Critical packed the weapons and grabbed onto his brother. "Move, we will scan the town." Hyper seemed confused, but he just went on ahead.
Hyper and Critical flew through the town, seeing no problems.
"Dude, let's stop in and say hi to Bronze and Blaze." Hyper stopped on a roof across from the Sugarcube Corner. Crit pulled him down before he could move. "WHAT?" Critical shushed Hypercritical. Crit pointed his hoof at the two stallions walking down the street. Hyper looked at the sight, at the pegasus standing before them. "Dark Storm!" Storm was trotting with another pegasus. His light brown coat, dark black mane/ crimson highlighted mane and tail, and video game cutie mark depiced no one that they were knew. Scanning the stranger, Hyper noticed a tattoo.
"That must be Dark Storm's partner, we should be careful. Dark Storm beat us single-handedly. With his partner, we stand no chance.: Critical stated blatantly. Hyper nodded. Storm and his partner stopped right outside of Sugarcube Corner.
"Do it." Storm looked at his partner, who raised his hoof. The other pegasus's tattoo lit up brightly. Then, his partner lowered his hoof. Once he did, all nearby lamp posts and electrical objects flickered out. A surge of electricity stuck Crit and Hyper, freezing them in place.
"I can't move." Hyper looked at Crit, who looked as frozen as he was. Storm and his companion moved into Sugarcube Corner.
"Welcome, sorry we are having some technical difficulties. While we get it sorted out, please sit down and we can get to you ASAP." Bronze smiled as he went off to the kitchen. Storm and his partner seated themselves. Blaze came out of the kitchen in a pink apron that read "PARTY WITH THE CHEF". Blaze hid his face in the apron while going up to the table of Dark Storm.
“Yeah, what can I get you two fine… gentlecolts.” Blaze fidgeted and looked towards the kitchen where Pinkie Pie was laughing. Blaze looked at who the customers were and freaked. “OH CRAP! YOU! BRONZE IT’S DARK STORM!” Dark Storm stood at his introduction and stuck his hoof out to Blaze.
“Pleasure to see you again; careful people say my hoofshakes are HOT!” Just then, Storm’s hooves erupted into flames. The inexpectancy caused Blaze Arlis to jump back, frighteningly; Bronze came out of the kitchen.
“What the? Who are you?” Bronze pointed to the pegasus next to Storm.
“I’m Brice, Storm’s partner-in-crime.” The two laughed maniacally. Bronze and Blaze looked at each other, knowing they stood no chance. They planned on drawing the two outside to hopefully find some way to beat them. Bronze started for the door, but Brice didn’t want them to leave. “No, you’re not leaving. SURGE." As Brice said this, he struck his hoof against the ground. Again his tattoo lit up, and electricity halted all the ponies from moving. “My, my you are stopped so easily.” The two laughed at the misfortune of Bronze and Blaze.
“Yo, Batty and Battery. You forgot little old us!” Hyper bust through the window and grabbed Storm and Brice. Hyper's immaturity was surprisingly intimidating for Dark Storm and Brice. The villains felt their skin crawl.
“Who you calling Batty, you crazy pegasus?” Dark Storm right-hooked Hyper, a simple crack broke the silence.
“NOW!” Hyper yelled. Just then, a hail of blades, spears, and other weapons came from the nearby roof, spearing into Storm and Brice. “Nice, direct hit!” Critical poked his head out from the roof and smiled.
“You COLT OF A -!” Hyper bucked Storm in the face before he could finish. Critical came down off the roof to get back the weapons, facing the two impaled enemies in front of him. Storm and Brice got up, still filled with holes and scratches.
“Well, seems Storm didn’t properly portray to me how strong you two really are. I’m sorry to underestimate you. Please, let me treat you as you deserve.” Brice bowed and immediately lit up his tattoo. Critical and Hyper backed up and prepared to fight. “You two seem confused; let me explain before you die.”
“What if we live, then you’ll just have doomed yourselves for a later battle?” Critical smirked at his competitor.
“Well, then think of it as veteran assistance for you fillies. Those “tattoos” are called Sigils of Partnership. The sigils are halves, and your partner has the other side. Some are cliché and unoriginal, like ours. My sigil is lightning, Storm’s is fire. Yours is different; it is complete, meaning your sigils show both extremes. What it is, I don’t know, yet it is the key to strength for these events. We are both pegasi, yet we can do more than fly, as you’ve seen. I’ve told you enough, now let me bless you with the gift that you deserve, our full power!”
“Thank you for your explanation, and now please do attack at us with your full power you cliché villain.” Critical lifted his rapier and prepared.
“SURGE!” Brice slammed his hoof on the ground, sending electricity through the earth. “As you can feel, I have the ability to make even the ground surge with electricity. Now, Storm, let’s finish them off.”Storm nodded.
“Hyper, break out using your speed!” Critical winced in pain. Hyper used his sigil to speed out of the trap.
“Damn it!” Storm was about to charge Hyper, yet Brice stuck up his hoof.
“Wings have muscles, don’t you forget. And if you shock muscles enough, they lock down.” Brice sent a lightning bolt straight at Hyper’s wings. Once hit, Hyper’s wings locked up, making him plummet to the ground.
“HYPER!” Critical screamed. Hyper quickly kicks off the wall of a nearby house, launching towards Critical. He grabs Critical and places him on a nearby roof.
“Stay here; you can’t control your sigil.” Critical couldn’t complain. He watched as his brother jumped off towards Brice.
“Yo, Blue Bird! Help!” As Hyper jumped over, he saw that Blaze and Bronze were fighting Storm and Brice.
“RUN!” Hyper charged at Brice with a furiating blow.
“So, you return!” Storm intercepted Hyper, and launched Hyper into a wall. “Now, let’s see you get out of this problem!” Storm came up and ignited his hooves, and proceeded to combo Hyper on the wall. Critical looked off the roof, and saw his brother helpless to get away from Storm’s flurry. Critical felt the feeling of responsibility for Hyper’s pain.
“STOP!” All eyes turned to Critical. His sigil lit up and 7 spears appeared out of thin-air. “Away!” Critical sent the spears into Storm’s hooves.
“Stay out of this.” Brice attacked Critical; as a defensive maneuver, Crit would morph weapons with his sigil, but, however, everytime he drew a weapon, he would bleed.
“I’ve got this!” Hyper flew over to Brice; he strafed left and right, and launched Brice into the sky. Higher, higher, higher, and once he reached a good point, Hyper flew past Brice and dive bombed.
“STORM!” Storm charged for Brice and Hyper. Storm tried to punch Hyper, but missed.
“HAMMMMERRR DROPPP!” As Hyper and Brice landed, all objects around were blasted away by the immense blast. Hyper quickly joined his brother, while Storm helped Brice up.
“Complete Surge.” Brice weakly used his power, this time completely locking down Critical and Hyper’s movement.
“That’s it, let’s finish them for good.” Storm and Brice’s sigils lit brightly. Then, Brice’s left hoof lit up with electricity, while Storm’s right hoof lit up with flames. “Once two ponies can master their abilities, they can even mix their powers into an ultimate team attack. Until Brice mastered surge, this attack was pointless, 'cause there was no target.”
“BLAZING CIRCUIT!” As they renounced their attack, they slammed their hooves together. The ground and all electrical objects burst into flames. “Blazing Circuit allows us to make an electrical circuit explode, yet it was pointless. Now even the ground is a circuit, so it is a trump card.” As the flames came closer to the brothers, they saw a flash of light.
“Stop this foolish dribble, and bow to your princesses!” Princess Luna and Princess Celestia appeared, and quelled the flames.
“Damn, Brice, we need to bolt.” Storm was about to flee, when Brice stopped him.
“They are our opponents.” Brice pointed at the sigils on the princesses. “We need to beat them, SURGE!” Brice used his powers to no avail.
“You attack your princess? Does thou have a death wish? Let me answer your wish with my beautiful moon.” Luna looked at Brice. “Lunar Descent.” A sphere of pure ice came down on command, almost toppling Brice, but Storm knocks it away.
“Back off, this tyrant is mine.” Luna twitched to the word “tyrant”.
“Sister kill the other one, I’ll take care of this rebel.” Celestia took off as did Luna, leaving Hyper, Critical, Blaze, and Bronze to sit and wonder at the princesses’ strength, nomming on their popcorn a kernel at a time.
“No one can survive my electricity, THUNDER PULSE!” A pulse of electricity took down the two sisters.
“Luna, we aren’t at full power yet. We are in danger.” Luna got her balance after being grounded by the pulse.
“We can’t lose.” Luna tried to move, but a wound on her hoof stops her.
“Good, now that we are sitting, COMPLETE SURGE!” Hyper quickly grabbed Critical and took off to avoid the surge. The princesses felt the blast and were stunned indefinitely.
“Critical, use your power on me.” Hyper darted out to defend the princesses. Critical waited for the moment to strike.
“Have you felt the cold wind?” Hyper flew over the two.
“What? He is still alive?” Storm watched for an opportunity, though Hyper flew in front of the sun, and immediately blinded Storm and Brice.
“What, how?” Brice covered his injured eyes. As Hyper flapped his wings, clangs and scratches of metal filled the air.
“Now feel the winds wrath, WIND LASH!” As Hyper flew over the two, they were slashed.
“Gahh… he didn’t even get close? Is he really that fast?” Brice looked at Storm. “Time to finish him. CONTROL!” As Brice stomped his hoof into the earth, his entire body lit up. “Go, ignite!”
“PHOENIX!” Storm flew towards Hyper, and ignited into nothing but fire. Storm intercepted Hyper and slammed into Hyper’s side, also getting cut up by Hyper’s wings.
“I… can’t… hold...out.” Critical’s eyes and mouth were gushing with blood, which caused him to black out. The blades disappeared and Hyper was defenseless. Once Hyper was close to the ground, Brice used his control power to block Hyper in with rock spires.
“DEATH OF A PHEONIX!” Storm dived and landed directly into Hyper, knocking him unconscious.
“SOLAR CRESCENT!” As Storm and Brice were fighting Hyper, they forgot about the princesses. As Celestia called, the sun came down, darkening the land. She broke it into a crescent and threw the crescent at the Brice and Storm, leaving two large gashes in their side that imploded in flames. Celestia moved the sun back, while Luna finished the two.
“Feel the burn forever, Cold Preservation!” Luna used her ice to make Brice feel the fire burning inside him forever, but the feeling of intense pain, doubled with the fire spreading to his organs killed him. “Let your inside be nothing but ice!” Luna stuck the tip of her royal hoof into one of the wounds on Storm and froze his insides. As Storm gasped, he looked for Brice, but couldn’t see him. Then, poor, defenseless Dark Storm died of hypothermia.
“Princess Celestia?” Twilight came over with Pinkie Pie, who warned her about the two ponies destroying Sugarcube Corner.
“Twilight, meet us at the library, I will explain everything there. Bronze and Blaze, grab the boys and bring them to the library." Everypony nodded, and spread out.
(It’s been awhile everypony. Time for some thanks. Colorlove and Potion Note weren’t featured in this chapter, but they will be back soon. Colorlove- bigMAREmac, Potion Note-B_Bubble132, Bronze- epicdonus1123 (my epic editor), Blaze “Ghosty” Arlis- BronyGC, Over Critical- Donceluzza(my semi-epic bro), Hyperactive- MEEE(THE EPIC OF EPIC EPICNESS). Now we thank the dead; Dark Storm- Hardcore Gamer59, and new to the thanks board (and now dead) Brice= -MeamZ- (Its different because he has dashes in his name, didn’t want to confuse ponies. THANKS AND RIP DARK STORM AND BRICE. /))
Bronze and Blaze carried the unconscious brothers to the library. Critical, covered in his own dried blood. Hyper, burnt and battered, scarred all over. Both brothers’ wounds have stopped bleeding, but the blood that came out keeps them locked in their mind, away from reality.
“Have they awoken?” Celestia rested inside in the library, with Twilight and the girls. Bronze shook his head as he dropped Hyper on the bed in the library.
“They’re dying… I don’t think they will awake. I believe we should put them out of their misery.” Luna grabbed a seat. Celestia glared here younger sister.
“We aren’t here to fight them. It would do you good to remember that.” Blaze dropped Critical on the other bed in the room.
“What is all this about, Princess?” Twilight brought tea out to the guests.
“I would be glad to explain. This war is between the ponies that wear the sigil of power. These sigils give the ponies’ power that works towards a common bond between them and their partners. All these ponies have to fight till only one team survives.” Celestia waits to see if the explanation she just gave made sense to the on lookers.
“So is that why you two killed them?” Blaze pestered, staring at Luna.
“All for the good of Equestria.” Luna scoffed.
“SCREW YOU!” Hyper leaps towards Luna, kicking her in the spine.
“Hyper!” Blaze leapt towards Hyper, missing him and landing near the surprised Luna. Luna smiled at the opportunity to kill another participant of the wars.
“Hyper, you think you can beat me one on one? That is amusing to us, for you will die now if you wish it.” Celestia interfered and grabbed Hyper.
“THAT BITCH… NO ONE NEEDS TO DIE!” Hyper stopped.
“So you want ponies like that, which would kill innocents to feed their hunger for blood. You wish that they could stay in Equestria and win their wish?” Luna trotted up to the levitated Hyper.
“… I… don’t know?” Hyper winces in pain, now over his adrenaline rush. Feeling the wounds and burns that cover his body. He drops to the ground, unable to move, immobilized in pain. “Critical… is he alright?” Celestia looked over at Critical, still unconscious.
“He lost too much blood… he will take time to recover.” Rarity galloped over to Critical’s side, grasping his hoof in her own.
“I will tend to his wounds and then Luna and I must go.” Celestia used her magic to patch up some of the obvious wounds on Critical. She thanked Twilight and bid her farewells.
“Those two are gonna be our main problem. They could’ve killed us now if they wanted.” Blaze trotted towards the door.
“Twilight, can you watch over Critical till he wakes up?” Bronze tended to Hyper’s wounds. “I’m going to take Hyper out, and make sure he doesn’t do anything stupid.”
“I’m right here!” Hyper attempted to gallop out the door, but collapses due to his wounds.
“See, he needs a chaperone to make sure he doesn’t die.” Twilight giggled and nodded. The three left the library, leaving Critical in the hands of 6 mares.
“WHAT HAPPENED?” Colorlove drops down out of the sky, landing on Hyper. “Why are you all bruised up?”
“Well… that’s a long story… please… get… off… me.” Hyper gasped for air.
“Sorry… it’s just, that Potion and I were so worried.” Potion Note blushed as she helped Colorlove up. Blaze assisted the winded Hyper, proceeding to carry Hyper until he gained full ability to breathe and move.
“Can we explain it to you later? It’s just we’re on a time clock.” Bronze lead the group onwards.
As they arrived at Sugarcube Corner, Bronze stopped the team.
“Okay, wait one minute and I’ll get the first aid kit from the kitchen. Blaze, make sure he doesn’t die, okay?” Blaze shrugged. Bronze chuckled as he walked into Sugarcube Corner.
“Excuse me… do any of you know Over Critical and Hyperactive?” The group turned to see a dark blue pegasus with abnormally large wings. The feathers on his wings protrude out farther than the size of the pegasus himself. His cutie mark was a blue feather with 3 lines of electricity running through it.
“Yeah, I’m Hyper, how can I help you?” Blaze smacked the back of Hyper’s head, then pointing to the pegasus’ back. Where the left wing meets the main torso, a sigil resided. “OH DAMN!”
“Um, and you are?” The pegasus turned to Potion Note.
“My name, my dear, is Spark Storm.” Hyper’s eyes dilated at the word “Storm”.
“Yo, Spark, do you have any family members?” Spark stood still at the mention of “family”.
“Yes, I have a younger sister, and that’s all. Here she is now, late as always.” As Spark said this, Scootaloo came flying by on her scooter.
“SCOOT RUN!” Blaze leapt forward to save the young filly, but Spark flashed in front of him. Blaze’s hoof dropped into Spark’s right wing. His hoof felt only feathers. “The hell… no bones?!”
“My shame… a birth defect that is my eternal sigil.” Spark withdrew from Blaze. “But now, we kill you.” Spark charged Hyper.
“OH DAM…!” Spark strikes him in the throat. Hyper stops short, dying slowly from suffocation as Spark choked him.
“YO!!!” Blaze called out Spark.
“I know you aren’t strong. Hyper must die! Then we will fly!” Scootaloo charged Blaze.
“RAZOR WHEEL!” Scootaloo became a giant wheel covered in spikes, and rolled down Blaze.
“…” Blaze lay out on the ground, dying slowly like Hyper.
“The Earth Is The Key, The Earth Is The Key, The Earth Is The Key, The Earth Is The Key, The Earth Is The…” A voice ringed in Blaze’s head.
“KEY!” Blaze’s sigil erupted in light.
“Hmm interesting. CRACKLING SURGE.” Spark’s sigil erupted as well. Sparks wings receded into his body. In their place came “wings” of complete electricity. “Electro FEATHER!” 3 “feathers” came flying at Blaze. Blaze, in response, smirked.
“SPIRE!” Blaze smashed the earth with his hoof, and in front of him came a spire of earth. The feathers just evaporated as they hit the spire. “Now am I problem?” Spark took flight.
“Sister, you too.” Scootaloo smiled.
“Okay, ROLLER’S DREAM!” Scootaloo’s sigil lit up and her wings receded into her body. In their place came 2 metallic wings. The wings also deployed 4 wheels that extended to the ground.
“WHAT THE FRIGGING HELL IS SCOOTALOO WEARING!?” Rainbow Dash, Twilight, Rarity, and Critical trotted over to Hyper lying on the ground. Critical’s coat is cleaned of all his dried blood, ready to battle.
“Why are you just watching Blaze get double teamed?” Hyper glared his cynical brother. “That’s why we’re here.” Critical trotted in range.
“Who’s that?” Spark stared at the unicorn.
“That’s Over Critical. Don’t worry, he’s a gentlecolt I’ll take care of him.” Scootaloo turned and charged Critical.
“Scootaloo what the hell… you can fly?” Rainbow Dash watches on with disbelief.
“Rainbow… Dash. I can fly FASTER THAN YOU!” Scoot’s eyes filled with tears. “My brother gave me flight, you gave me… dreams.”
“Sorry Scootaloo.” Once Scoot was close enough where she had no reaction time, Critical conjured his spears, 3 for now. Scoot ran into them, damaging her wings. She plummeted to the ground as the wings malfunctioned.
“Sister!” Spark prepared to catch Scoot, but Blaze stopped him. Blaze launched Spark airborne with his spires.
“Yo Spark, every hear of dub steps?” Spark recovered from the barrage which brought him to the ground.
“BEAT RIPPLE!” The earth rippled in and the earth cracked almost swallowing Spark whole, but instead the cracked earth expelled spires that impaled Spark’s wings. The electricity’s circuit was interrupted, and Spark’s wings disappeared.
“That ended quickly.” Bronze exited Sugarcube Corner, holding the first aid kit.
“YOU WERE JUST WATCHING?” Bronze stuck his tongue out and smiled.
“I bring gifts for the victors and of course the mares.” Behind Bronze is a plate of doughnuts.
“Save those, for the victor hasn’t been decided. Crackling Surge.”
“I beat you once, I can again.”
“I’m behind you, partner.” Bronze placed the doughnuts down and gave the first aid kit to the girls to help Hyper, then joined Blaze in battle.
“But you don’t have your sigil power.”
“It doesn’t matter we work off of one another.”
“Fine, but don’t die.”
“… I’ll scratch that off the list.” Bronze and Blaze laughed.
“Is it weird that they are more in sync then we are bro?” Hyper stared as Twilight and Rarity patched his many wounds.
“Not my fault your reckless abandon makes us lose.” Critical sat down next to Hyper.
“Why aren’t you helping us?” Blaze turned to see Critical pull a tea set out of nowhere. With the tea set came three chairs and a small table.
“Thank you dear.” Rarity kissed Critical.
“Tea Time Blaze, my apologizes.”
“Time to die.” With those words, Scootaloo and Spark took off into the sky.
“SPARK STORM!!!!” Spark’s wings disappeared, all his feathers flying off and circling the area. Hyper ran and grabbed Twilight and Rainbow Dash. Critical grabbed Rarity, and shielded her beneath his body. The feathers flew down, stabbing into the 4 stallions, trying to cover the mares from harm. Once they hit, a static surge runs through each. Spark clapped his hooves, and the feathers lit up brighter and brighter. They hissed.
“GIRLS RUN!” Critical threw Rarity to Twilight, who was picked up by Rainbow, and the three flew up.
“Wow, we can’t catch a freaking break, can we?” Bronze chuckled. The stallions all huddled in a circle, and grabbed Hyper’s hoof.
“Die!” As Spark said this, Hyper jumped, which failed because the feathers created an electric field that holds them down. The feathers all hissed louder, then exploding. The stallions were thrown all over the place. Hyper was torn again; blood and flesh presided where the stallions were when the feathers exploded. The 4 couldn’t stand. They were slowly dying.
“Alright boys, that’s enough. Isn’t it rude to fight when company is over?” The voice echoed through Hyper’s head.
Yo everyone, loopertooper here, time for some thanks. Today we got a cliff hanger, and one new arrival who survived. Also we got some new sigil powers. Okay now first is the new pony on the block; mechafone- Spark Storm. Now for the originals- Over Critical-Donceluzza (My EXCELLENT brother buddy); Potion Note- B_Bubble132; Colorlove- bigMAREmac; Blaze Arlis- BronyGC (My EXCELLENT following buddy); Bronze- epicdonus1123 (My EXCELANT editing buddy), Hyperactive- loopertooper (My EXCELLENT me). GOODNIGHT EVERYPONY, see you next chapter.