"It was you Tex. All along. You see I thought- I thought we made you. The Director, the fragments... but that's not the case." Church said. "You made us. When the Alpha was created, you just kinda came along for the ride. You gave the Director the idea that he could make something more. That he could split the Alpha up. Don't you get it? You were the memory. You were the key. You were so strong, you made a whole other person. God... he always wanted to find you. To get you right. To just see you one last time. And he wanted me to be able to do the same... to find you in here or..."
Church then looked away from Tex and towards the sky.
"To find you in here or just go down another iteration, figure out this little Tex problem. Figure out how to do it right. But now I know... I know how to fix all of this. How to end it once and for all. It was so simple all along. I just had to tell you three words. Three words I wasn't capable of telling you before..." Church trailed off.
"Oh okay, wait a minute..." Tex said, interrupting Church. "Are you going to say 'I love you'?"
"No Tex. No. I'm not going to say I love you." Church sighed, trying as hard as he could to force the words out. "I'm going to say I forget you."
As Church uttered that phrase, the world started to shake and he closed his eyes, already filled with regret.
"I forget you." Church said again, looking to where Tex used to be standing. "I'm letting you go."
As the world continued to shake, Church gripped his gun harder and looked up.
"Okay world. Do your fucking worst." Church snarled. "Because I sure as hell just did mine."
"It's opening!" Caboose yelled at the top of his lungs. "It's working!"
"What the fuck was that?" Church asked while he was in the Epsilon unit, waiting for his destruction which he believed to be imminent.
"I see him!" Caboose continued yelling. "I see him, he's in there! He's okay!"
"Is that Caboose?" Sarge asked, looking up at the tear in space to see his enemies face.
"Is Caboose... god?" Simmons asked. "I mean, I can kind of see it now that I think about it. It sure would explain the fuck out of the platypus."
"Well that's just great. Caboose is god." Sarge mumbled. "I guess that makes me the first person in the history of the universe that doesn't want to go to heaven. Good job blue team... you find a way to make everything suck."
"What? Let me see moron. It's just a bunch of circuits." Said Sarge, appearing in the tear next to Caboose.
"Yeah but they're GLOWING! He's alive!" Caboose exclaimed.
"Um, Sarge?" Simmons asked nervously. "What are you doing up there?"
"What? Is that me? And more importantly, why am I talking with a blue?" Sarge asked.
Sarge then proceeded to yell, not realizing that they are in fact in the Epsilon unit.
"Attention enormous version of myself." Sarge said. "I order you to attack!"
"No... NO! The memory unit isn't dying. This isn't the end of the world." Church said, realizing that he had made a big mistake. "IT'S A FUCKING RESCUE MISSION! No!"
"Well, get him out of there!" Sarge ordered.
"No! No! Stop! Stop it! Leave me here!" Church yelled, without realizing that they could not hear him. Church soon found himself coming out of the epsilon unit. "No! Dammit! Why? Why did you do it?"
"Church! You're alive!" Caboose said ecstatically, happy his best friend is back. "Yeah, I knew it. Yeah, I told them that she was right. Yeah, we COULD get you out."
"Alright then, we're squared blue." Sarge said. "We helped you get your shiny blue buddy out so that makes us-"
"What are you doing here?" Church yelled.
"We saved you!" Caboose said. "We found you in the place where they were keeping you and we traveled a really, really long way to come to this place, and we followed a bunch of people, and then we followed a bunch of more people and then we got you and took you and saved you, the end!
"Why would you do that?" Church asked. "Why?
"Well clearly it wasn't to hear 'thank you'." Sarge commented dryly.
"Hey we're taking fire out here!" Yelled Grif from the other side of the wall.
"Thank you?" Church said sarcastically. "You fucked everything up! I was at peace. I had it figured out. It was OVER! Put me back."
"Put you back?" Sarge said with a small laugh. "Buddy, we just fought through an entire military base to reach you. And now you want to go back?"
"YES!" Church yelled, hoping that they would send him back in.
"She said we need you! She was the one who knew how to get you out." Caboose said.
"She? Who are you- who are you talking about?" Church asked, hoping he would be right with his guess. "Tex? The REAL Tex?"
"Tex?" Caboose asked himself. "No, no not Tex. The new lady."
"New lady?" Church asked, wondering who Caboose could be talking about.
The door near them opened and in walked a woman who Church was familiar with.
"Hey there Alpha. Been looking for you for a long time." Said the woman, walking up to Church.
"Oh no..." Church said, confirming his suspicions.
"Now that I've found you, you're going to help me with what I should have done years ago." She said, ignoring Church. You're going to help me kill the director."
----------------------------------------------------------------------
"I'm not doing ANYTHING with you... Carolina" Church said.
"I don't think you have much of a choice on the matter." Carolina said.
"Hey! What if I want a turn in the machine?" Caboose asked, picking the Epsilon unit and waving it in the air.
"No wait! Caboose don't-" Church said, all but too late realizing that Caboose had already used the device on himself, transporting him into a place that is unknown to all of them, "do that... damn it."
"Small thing here." Sarge grunted. "But, I thought this watchamacallit only worked on AIs."
Church stared at the device and pondered this.
Is Caboose an AI? No, no AI's stand for artificial intelligence. Not artificial incompetence... Church thought to himself.
He then decided to stop worrying about HOW Caboose got in there, and to start worrying about how to get him OUT.
"No time for chit chat, we're going NOW!" Commanded Carolina.
"I'm not leaving without my..." Church let out a deep sigh. He never thought he would hear himself say the word he was about to say in the same sentence with Caboose. "I'm not leaving without my friend."
"Make it quick." Carolina said, glaring at Church. She then sighed, knowing he wouldn't budge without Caboose. "We might need a piece of meat to throw in case we come into any trouble."
"Deal." Church said, moving to the unit.
Inside the unit, Caboose appeared hundreds of miles in the air, way above land.
"Yaaaaay!" Caboose yelled as he went down, looking at all the colors and rainbows. "Look at all the beautiful colors! Hey there is even some blu-" Caboose started to yell, but was cut short due to him slamming into the ground at hundreds of miles per hour.
"Oh my goodness what was that?" Yelled a small, soothing voice. "Hey! There's somepony in here! Help."
"Hey the ground is hugging me!" Caboose said, nuzzling the small crater in which he created. "I love you too ground, thank you for the hug."
"And he seems to be hurt!" Yelled the same pony, making her way down the crater. "Sir, are you okay?"
"Yes I am okay, thank you for asking ground!" Caboose said, slowly getting up and trembling slightly. "I think you hugged too hard, I can't feel my body!"
The pony got to the bottom of the hole and walked up to Caboose.
"Sir, calm down I'll go get help." The pony said.
"Hello there." Caboose said, not noticing the blood rush he was feeling. "May I interest you in some cook- cookies?"
"What?" The pony asked nervously.
Caboose then fell down on all fours barely conscious.
"Stop it ground... people are watching!" Caboose whispered.
He then collapsed onto the ground, completely unconscious.
"I think he is waking up." A pony said softly. "Excuse me, are you alright?"
"My mouth tastes just like high school!" Caboose said, starting to wake up.
"What?" A different pony asked. "Your face was bleeding everywhere. Some blood must have gotten in your mouth."
"Yep," Caboose said, trying to sit up. "Just like high school."
Caboose went to grab his forehead where he was having one of his brain owies but stopped when he noticed he did not have hands to grab with.
"Oh no! They took my hands!" Caboose yelled. "Do you know what happened to my hands?"
All the ponies in the room took a quick glance at each other.
"Who are you?" A blue pony asked, not sure how to answer his question.
"My name is Caboose. But some people just call me Blue!" He said, looking around, finally noticing he was surrounded by ponies. This pleased him immensely. "My best friend calls me "Caboose, stop talking" so I guess you can call me that too if you want."
"Oh, well it's nice to meet you Caboose!" The purple unicorn said, extending her front leg towards him.
"Who is Caboose?" He asked, as his voice suddenly changed to be more quiet. "Is he mean?"
"I thought you just said your name was Caboose." A yellow pegasus said.
"You mean I have a twin?" Caboose asked excitedly.
"What?" The yellow one asked. "No. I don't know."
"Oh Caboose!" Caboose yelled in a sad voice. "You were my only twin and I never got the chance to tell you how much I loved you. I will miss you almost as much as I miss Andersmith!"
"I'm beginning to think that he belongs in a hospital for the mentally ill, not the physically ill." The white unicorn whispered to the purple one.
"What are you talking about?" Caboose yelled, obviously misunderstanding what she had said. "I don't have any Mentos!"
"Hey, uh, Caboose." The purple unicorn said. "Do you remember anything before being in the hospital?"
"Oh yes I remember lots of things." Caboose said, lost in deep thought. "Like my twin Caboose. Oh, I should go get him! He's a lot like me. I think. I don't know, I've never met him."
"So you've said." The purple unicorn said to him, then she leaned over and whispered to the orange pony. "Go get the doctor, we need to find out if he's... alright."
The orange pony nodded and left the room. The other ponies got a bit closer to Caboose.
"Uh, well my name is Twilight Sparkle." The purple one said. "The pony that just left is called Applejack."
"My name is Fluttershy. I'm the one that brought you here." The yellow one said.
"You have pretty wings!" Caboose said.
"Oh. Thank you." Fluttershy said, blushing slightly.
"My name is Rarity." The white unicorn said, extending her hoof.
Caboose stared at it for several seconds. "Oh sorry, I haven't done this in a while." Caboose then surprised Rarity, giving her a hoof bump.
"Oh. How... quaint." Rarity said, taking a step back.
"Sorry if I was a little rusty. Most of the time, when somebody shows me their hands, it's either to hit me, or to hit me even harder than that." Caboose then turned to a floating blue pegasus. "Church! How did you get up there? And where did you get a jetpack?
"Who's Church?" Asked the blue floating pony. "My name is Rainbow Dash."
"Oh." Caboose asked again. "And where did you get the jetpack?"
"What? These?" Rainbow Dash said, pointing to her wings. "These are wings. You just complimented Fluttershy on her wings. You must have hit your head really hard or something."
"Yeah I tend to do that a lot, and then I always end up in a hospital and end up talking to random ponies, and then end up having a good time. But then Tucker tells me to stop writing in my diary because he says writing in a diary is for little girls." Caboose said, then lowered his voice expecting Tucker was near. "I wrote that down in my diary."
"I love meeting new ponies!" A pink pony said, shooting out from under his bed.
"Me too! Hey, how did you get down there?" Asked Caboose. "Is Narnia down there?"
"No silly!" The pink one said. She then leaned in and whispered. "There's three Narnias down there."
Pinkie, however, did not actually know what Narnia was.
"Three Narnias?" Caboose thought to himself. "That's more than two Narnias!"
"Pinkie, stop it." Twilight said, pushing Pinkie away from Caboose. "Are you well?"
"Yes." Caboose said. "I'm very well, how are you?"
"Oh, I'm fine." Twilight said smiling. "I'm glad you're alright."
"I'm not alright." Caboose said. "I'm Caboose. What is your name?"
Before Twilight could answer him, a beige pony wearing a white coat stepped in.
"Hello, what is your name?" He asked.
"My name is Caboose. I was named after my twin, but if you want you can call me alright." Caboose replied.
"Uh-huh." The doctor said, checking off the 'delirious' box on the patient log. "Do you think you can walk?"
"I don't know let me try." Caboose said.
Caboose then tried to get up on his hind hooves, but then he just fall flat on his face. He tried doing it again and nearly fell out a window, but Rainbow Dash quickly stopped him and put him on all fours.
"Thank you lady." Caboose said.
"Alright, er, Caboose did you say it was? Are you feeling anything right now?" The doctor asked.
"No I am not feeling anything. But I would like to be feeling a puppy." Caboose sighed happily. "Puppies are soft."
"No, what I mean is, are you feeling stressed right now?" The doctor asked. "Happy? Tired? Hungry?"
"I am always happy." Caboose said. "I only ever stop to be not happy when I am sad."
"Mhm." The doctor muttered. This is going to be a long day...
"Well?" Twilight asked after roughly thirty minutes of back and forth between Caboose and himself.
"Well, he certainly is a little disoriented, but I believe that is due to the crash." The doctor explained. "He has no broken bones, which is very lucky, so I suggest you take him home."
"We should throw a party to celebrate his good health!" Pinkie Pie said, letting out a large gasp.
"Pinkie, we don't even know him." Rainbow Dash said. "Why should we throw a party for him?"
"I don't know." Pinkie answers truthfully. "I think he is kind of nice. A little weird, but who doesn't like being weird sometimes?"
Pinkie Pie then cartwheeled into the room Caboose is in. "How did you do that? Is it magic?"
Twilight couldn't help but smile, "Thank you Dr. Stables. Come on Caboose, it's time to get out of here."
"But the bed is so comfy." Caboose whimpered.
"Yeah, but we’re throwing you a party." Pinkie said, giggling.
"Where?" Caboose said. "On the bed?"
"No silly, where would you get that idea?" Pinkie said, raising her brow, still smiling.
"Oh, just my friend Tucker." Caboose said. "Well he's not really my friend, but he always says he has parties with my sister in his bed. One time I asked him if I could come and he said only two people were allowed and occasionally a third person, like my mother, could go too."
"Who ever heard of a party with that few people?" Pinkie asked.
"That is exactly what I said!" Caboose agreed. He then noticed her mane. "Is your hair made of cotton candy?"
"No it just looks like it." Pinkie giggled, tilting her head to the side to give Caboose a better look.
"Come on guys let's get out of here, the doctor said Caboose is free to go." Twilight said. "He needs this room for other patients."
"Alright then. Just let me pack my things." Caboose said.
"What things?" Fluttershy asked apologetically. "When I found you you had nothing near you. Don't tell me I left one of your belongings there."
"Well I guess I'm done packing then." Caboose said, jumping out of the hospital bed. "I always feel good after packing my stuff up. Hey what is that?" Caboose sprinted out of the room, faster than he had ever run before.
"Somethin' ain't right with that boy." Applejack said.
"Oh well, let's go get him before he causes any damage," groaned Twilight.
The girls soon caught up with Caboose, who was demanding a lollipop for being in the hospital.
"I'm sorry sir, but the lollipops are for the little ones." The receptionist stated.
"Please, I've been a good boy this year!" Caboose pleaded. "I promise."
The receptionist rolled her eyes and gave in. "Fine you can take one, and only one."
"I heard two!" Caboose yelled, taking two and walking up to Pinkie Pie. "Here you go. I got one for you."
Pinkie Pie was never given anything by a stallion before unless it was her birthday. Pinkie Pie blushed slightly and kissed Caboose on the cheek.
"Aw, thanks Caboose." Pinkie said, glancing over at the bowl of lollipops. "Hang on, I'll be right back."
Pinkie Pie ran up to the receptionist at the counter and asked if she could have a lollipop. The receptionist decided she would stop arguing and just give the bowl to her. Pinkie Pie then hopped happily back to Caboose and gave him the entire bowl.
"This is the single greatest moment of my life." Caboose said, blushing. "No that one. No wait, that one was pretty good too. I like where this moment is going."
Pinkie Pie and Caboose moved towards the doorway of the hospital, both munching on lollipops.
"This one is blue! Just like you!" Pinkie Pie said.
"Oh my gosh!" Caboose yelled. "You can talk!"
The girls stood back, staring at the pair as they skipped out the door.
"It's like having a second Pinkie Pie." Rarity asserted.
"I got a bad feelin' bout this one girls." Applejack said, frowning.
"You got that spine tingling sensation too?" Twilight asked.
All the girls shared a nervous giggle.
"Equestria is doomed." Twilight said jokingly, as the mares got over their shock and hurried after the dynamic duo
"So when is this party going to happen?" Caboose asked.
"It’s a surprise." Pinkie giggled.
"A surprise?" Caboose yelled with excitement, grabbing onto Pinkies hooves, spinning in circles. "And it's not even my birthday! You are amazing!"
"You are pretty amazing yourself." Pinkie Pie said, winking at him.
"Only two people have ever said that to me before..." Caboose said. "And you are the first."
Applejack laughed. "I hafta admit, his innocence kinda makes him fun to have around."
"I have to say," Rarity said, watching Pinkie Pie and Caboose prance in circles. "Out of the six of us, Pinkie Pie is the one I least expected to find a stallion that matched her personality so... perfectly."
"Yeah." Twilight agreed, beginning to get a little worried. "Hey Caboose, I don't mean to bother you but... do you have any real friends?"
Caboose stopped dancing with Pinkie Pie and looked over at Twilight. He then looked at the ground and placed the bowl of lollipops down beside him and sat on the grass. Caboose was always caught up doing things Church and Tucker always wanted to do that he never really thought about how close they actually are.
"Well, the only two people I usually talk to are Tucker and Church. But Tucker is always mean to me, and Church is a bit too serious so I never felt that close to him. I think the only reason I call him my friend is because he doesn't yell at me all the time." Caboose said somberly, beginning to tear up. "I guess the answer to your question is no. I don't have any real friends."
"You don't know anypony else?" Rarity asked.
"Not really. I mean, there are a few people that live near me and Church and Tucker, but they are always calling me names. I don't like them very much." He said, now realizing that his old life wasn't that great and that nobody truly appreciates him. "If you excuse me, I think I want to be alone right now."
And with that, Caboose walked away, head down, sniffling softly to try and find a place to think.
"What is wrong with you ponies? Why would you say something like that?" Pinkie Pie yelled. "He barely came out of the hospital ten minutes ago and you guys are already making fun of him?"
"Pinkie, we’re just-" Twilight started to object, but Pinkie Pie ran after Caboose in an effort to catch up with him.
Twilight couldn't help but feel a strong pang of guilt.
"Caboose, where are you?" Pinkie Pie yelled, trying to find her new friend.
He was not answering. Why would Twilight ask a question like that? As much as Twilight knows, she sure doesn't know how to meet new ponies. After running around Ponyville for a couple minutes she soon saw the blue stallion, sitting alone on a bridge over a stream. She also saw that his eyes were wet.
"Caboose what's wrong?" Pinkie Pie asked, taking a seat next to Caboose, putting her foreleg over his shoulder.
"Nothing." Caboose said, letting out a deep sigh. "It's just that sometimes I remember who I am."
"Oh?" Pinkie Pie asked, raising her brow. "And who are you?"
"A loser." Caboose said. "Everyone I have ever met always points out my flaws. They never try to get to know the actual me. And something tells me that's because they don't want to."
"I don't think you're a loser." Pinkie Pie said, nuzzling Caboose’s neck.
"Thanks, but I know how you really feel." Caboose said, shaking his head, slowly pushing her off. "I know that you are just saying that to make me go away. Tucker does that all the time. Mostly after he calls me a name and I start feeling bad."
Pinkie Pie looked straight into Caboose’s eyes, "If I wanted you to go away then why would I come looking for you silly?" Pinkie Pie asked, smiling lightly.
Caboose looked back at Pinkie Pie who was giving him a smile. He then leaned in and gave her a quick peck on the lips. Pinkie Pie was surprised by this and brought her head back, blushing ever so slightly.
"Sorry." Caboose said, thinking that he had scared her off. "I promise I won't do that again. I was caught up in the moment."
"Ah it's okay." Pinkie said, waving her hoof to show him that it was nothing. Pinkie then looked back into Caboose’s eyes, leaned in and pecked him back. Caboose blushed and fell backwards, landing on the bridge. He was starting to get back to his old self.
"I think I like you." Caboose said, smiling now.
"Aw, I like you too." Pinkie said. "I'm glad you're my friend."
"A friend." Caboose thought to himself, smiling wider than he ever had before.
"How about we go back and get that party started." Pinkie said, jumping around.
"Okay." Caboose said happily. He then started walking forward, then soon found himself stopping. "But I think your friends don't like me."
"Don't mind them, they just haven't gotten to know you yet." Pinkie said, raising her hoof. "I'm sure they'll love you once they get to know you."
"Thank you." Caboose said with a large smile on his face. "I didn't realize how much words could heal until it was my turn."
Caboose grabbed Pinkie’s hoof and Pinkie smiled back.
"You know, we could start the party a bit later." Pinkie Pie said. "Maybe I could show you around town."
"I would like that." Caboose said excitedly.
"I think I know where we should go first." Pinkie said, leading Caboose with her.
After about five minutes of walking and they found themselves in front of-
"A GIANT GINGERBREAD HOUSE!" Caboose yelled, hopping up and down excitedly. "It's like at the end of the year when I leave one for Santa, but there are no bite marks in this one."
"You're silly." Pinkie giggled as she opened the door. "Mr. and Mrs. Cake? Are you here?"
"Yes Pinkie, we're just baking a batch of sweets right now." Replied Mrs. Cake.
"Well, take a look around Caboose." Pinkie said.
Caboose slowly let go of Pinkie Pie’s hoof and started doing what she said. He glanced everywhere and soon realized that he was surrounded by many tasty things.
"Oh my gosh! They have cupcakes!" Caboose yelled. "And cookies. And muffins. AND THEY EVEN HAVE CUPCAKES!"
Mr. and Mrs. Cake walked out of the back, both holding platters upon platters of tasty treats. Caboose’s heart nearly exploded.
"Who is your friend?" Mrs. Cake asked, putting the food on display.
"Oh this is Caboose." Pinkie said. "We met in the hospital."
"Oh, I hope it wasn't anything too serious." Mrs. Cake said with a worried expression on her face.
"Oh don't worry about me. It wasn't THAT big of a fall." Caboose said, now looking at Mrs. Cake’s hair. "Your hair looks like icing!"
Mrs. Cake raised her brow at him. "Is he... alright?"
"No I’m Caboose. Why do people keep calling me alright?"
Pinkie giggled and went around to the back of the counter and opened it.
"So, do you want anything to eat?" Pinkie asked.
"Yes please! I would like a cupcake." Caboose said, now looking into Pinkies eyes once again.
"Sure thing! Which one do you want?" She asked.
Looking at all of the sweet treats that he could choose he thought he would have a tough time choosing from all of them. But he found the treat he wanted right away.
"I want the pink one." Caboose said.
Pinkie Pie looked at Caboose and couldn't help but smile. Mr. and Mrs. Cake looked at each other, giving each other a soft smile. Pinkie gave a big and pink cupcake to Caboose, and then she grabbed a blue one for herself. She used her free hoof to grab onto Caboose’s free hoof to lead him out.
"Thank you for the cupcakes Mrs. Cake." Pinkie said, now out the door.
"Thank you for the cupcakes!" Caboose yelled. When he was out of the door and the when the door shut he yelled once again. "Oh my gosh it's a gingerbread house!"
"You already said that." Pinkie giggled.
"Oh I know, I just like pretending. It makes everything much more fun." Caboose said, finishing his cupcake. "And I like having fun."
"I like having fun too." Pinkie said. She then stopped, tightening her grip on Caboose’s hoof. "But not as much as I like you."
And with that, she leaned in to kiss. Caboose saw this, leaned in, and kissed her back and they stood kissing for several seconds, now hugging each other. Caboose had never felt so comfortable with himself in his life.
"Come on." Pinkie said, stopping the kiss, hopping ahead. "Let's go get that party started."
"Right behind you Pinkie." He yelled, hopping after her.
Pinkie, much to her own surprise, decided that the party could wait a bit longer, so she put it on hold and decided to show Caboose a few more sights. She was happy that she could show everything Ponyville has to offer to her friend. Caboose looked off in the distance and sees the most wonderful of sights.
"Oh my gosh, a fountain!" He yelled with ecstasy. "And a magical castle! I want to live in a castle one day."
"That's Canterlot, silly! It's where the princesses live." Pinkie Pie giggled.
"Oh my gosh. I've always wanted to be a princess." Caboose gasped, then looks at Pinkie. "But now I think I want to be a queen."
"Only if I get to be the king!" Pinkie exclaimed. "I'm glad I met you Caboose. You're really fun to have around."
"Why, thank you Pinkie!" Caboose smiled. "You are really fun to be around yourself."
"Alright, enough of the views." Pinkie said, walking away. "It's time to party."
"Oki-doki.' Caboose said, following Pinkie.
After a few more minutes of walking they found themselves in front of a giant tree.
"Oh wow. Look how big that tree is!" Caboose said. "That must be the biggest tree EVER!"
Twilight heard the remark and walked up to the door an opened it.
"Hey Caboose." Twilight said, remembering what she had said to him before. "How’s it going?"
"Pretty good, I guess." Caboose said, raising the volume of his voice for no particular reason. "Yeah, I was sitting on a bridge and I was crying because I was sad, but then Pinkie came by and she gave me a cupcake and now I'm happy again."
"Oh, that's good." Twilight said. "Caboose, I'm really sorry for what I said. Do you think you can forgive me?"
"Yeah, I can." Caboose said, smiling at Twilight. "Apology accepted."
Caboose stepped out of the way and let Pinkie hop in first. After she did, Caboose followed and looked around the room. There was books everywhere.
"I have never seen this many diaries in my life." Caboose gasped.
"Oh, they aren't diaries." Twilight explained. "They are just books. Some are about history, some are about magic, some are just adventure novels."
"Oh. I like adventures."
"So Pinkie. I assume you brought him here for the party?" She asked, raising her brow. "I haven't set anything up so I'm so-"
"Oh that's okay Twi, just go get the others and let me and Caboose will handle it from here."
"Oh, okay. Be right back then." Twilight said, leaving the house.
"She doesn't mind." Pinkie said, reaching in her mane. "Behind her book worm exterior lies a die hard party pony, I just know it."
"There's a pony inside of her?" Caboose gawked. "Does it hurt?"
Pinkie let out a sarcastic sigh, but then started to laugh.
"You're silly. Time to set up the party!" Pinkie yelled, yanking a cannon out of her hair. "Pinkie Pie style."
She lit the fuse on the cannon and it promptly erupted, spewing out confetti, a boombox, plates with snacks on them and a piñata flew out.
"What? No punch?" Caboose asked.
"Hang on, this thing always jams." Pinkie said, hitting the cannon. The cannon then sputtered and shot a punch bowl onto a table.
"I want one of those."
"Well we'll just have to make you one then." Pinkie promised. "But let's wait for the girls."
Caboose and Pinkie sat next to each other, waiting for the girls to arrive. About ten minutes later, all the girls walked back through the door.
"Hey, they're here." Caboose said jumping up and down. "Hello little ponies! Are you ready to have some fun?"
"We sure as apple pie are." Applejack said.
"Great." Caboose said, slamming his hoof down on the boombox. "Let's get started then."
Caboose then started dancing oddly. It was somewhere between break dancing and a seizure. Twilight and the others burst out laughing.
"You're just jealous." Caboose said happily, jiggling his butt. "You know you can't party as hard as me."
"Oh it is ON!" Pinkie yelled, running next to Caboose doing her own strange dance.
Twilight looked at the others and shrugged.
"Looks like they're having a good time." Fluttershy said.
"Yeah." Rainbow Dash agreed. "But why should they be the only ones having fun?"
Rainbow Dash went over to where Pinkie and Caboose were rolling on the floor and started to dance.
"When in Canterlot..." Twilight said, walking to where they were dancing, and was followed by the other ponies.
All the ponies were having a good time until the ground suddenly started to shake and all the ponies fell to the ground except for Caboose.
"What's happening?" Fluttershy asked, trying to rise to her feet.
"I don't know." Twilight gasped. "But whatever it is I don't like it."
Caboose closed his eyes as hard as he could and then ran out the door, staring up at the sky.
"Please no." Caboose yelled. "I want to stay! I don’t want to go!"
"What is he yelling about?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"I don't know." Twilight replied. "Caboose! Get back in here!"
Caboose ignored Twilight’s plea and stayed outside yelling. "Stay away! You don't want to see me when I get angry!"
"Who in Celestia’s name is he talking to?" Rarity asked. "And why is he yelling?"
The earthquake soon stopped and all the girls got their balance back. Pinkie Pie then ran to Caboose, who was looking up in the air. She saw something, something strange, falling from the sky. And falling fast.
"ShiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiIIIIIIIIIII-" Church yelled, slamming into the ground.
"Everybody, out of the way!" Sarge yelled, landing on Church.
"Ow! Jesus Christ, you broke my spine." Church complained.
"Ah, quit being such a wuss." Sarge said, getting up shaking his head. "I always knew the blues were cowardly, but now I know just how much, and plus you aren't even real, so why would you care if... say... what's with all these horses?"
"Oh, hello, Sarge." Caboose smiled blankly at the red being. "How nice of you to drop in."
"Did that horse just talk?" Sarge asked after a few seconds of staring at it, dumbfounded.
"What is that thing?" Applejack asked, slowly walking towards the red metal machine.
"What? You never seen an advanced super soldier before?" Sarge asked.
"Can't say that ah have." Applejack said, now backing away.
"Do you know him, Caboose?" Twilight asked.
"Yeah. Sarge is... um." Caboose paused. "Yeah, I really don't know what he is, but I know him."
"Ugh." Church groaned, grabbing the back of his neck. "Where are we?"
"Church!" Caboose yelled, remembering what he thought earlier. "What are you doing here?"
"Caboose? Are you a horse?" Church asked.
"No." Caboose said innocently. "I am a pony. They are two completely different things."
"Is that the Church you talked about?" Pinkie asked, huddling next to Caboose.
"Yeah. Oh hey Church! This is Pinkie Pie! And that one is Twilight! I forget what the white one's name is, but the orange one’s name is-"
"Wait, what are you doing here?" Church interrupted. "What is this place?"
"It's a mystical land of ponies." Caboose said. "And the ground always tries to hug me, but that's alright with me. But the orange one’s name is Applejack, the yellow one with the pretty wings is called Fluttershy, and the blue one with the wings is called Rainbow Cast."
"Dash." Rainbow Dash corrected.
"Dash Cast." Caboose said, trying to correct himself. "Oh sorry, I just now realized how colorful her mane is so I lost concentration. This is Rainbow Dash."
Church let out a grunt, and looked around. Sarge did the same.
"Hey Sarge, do the colors here... pop out to you?" Church asked.
"Yeah, now that you mention it, they do." Sarge said. "They make me feel like punching something. Hard."
Sarge then punched Church in the chest as hard as he could, knocking the wind out of him.
"There we go, all better now." Sarge sighed.
"You son of a bitch." Church whined, holding onto his gut, gasping for air. "Why would you do that?"
"I did that so you would start acting like a soldier." Sarge said.
"These things are weird." Twilight said, thinking the situation over. "I think I need to go get princess Celestia."
"Okay you do that." Caboose said. "I will go get my mommy."
Church facepalmed. How on earth is he still alive after all these years...
"So what are you two doing here?" Caboose asked. "Are you here to try the cupcakes? They're great!"
"No Caboose, we're here to get you out." Church said. "You don't belong here."
"You always said that to me before I came here. And now you want me to go back?"
"Yes." Church said, grabbing Caboose’s shoulder. "And you're coming with us. Now. We need to leave."
"No." Caboose stated.
Church stared at Caboose for what seemed to be an eternity.
"Did you just say no?" Church asked.
"Yes. I mean no." Caboose said. "Wait. Maybe. I forgot what we were talking about."
"We were talking about how we came here to take you back, son." Sarge said. "Even if we have to drag you back."
"I don't want to." Caboose whined, stomping his hooves. "I want to stay here."
"Yeah well it's out of your hands." Church said, grabbing Caboose’s shoulder a second time.
Caboose kicked Church in the face with his back hooves with as much force as he could muster.
"OW! What the fuck Caboose?" Church yelled. "What the fuck has gotten into you?"
Caboose looked at Pinkie, who was still huddling up to him and he threw his arm over her and hugged her tightly. He then looked back at Church.
"You have GOT to be kidding me." Church said.
"Well, I can't say I disapprove of his choice of women." Sarge said. "I mean look at her, shes PINK. Pink is just a lighter red, that makes her good in my books."
"Sarge do you mind shutting the fuck up?" Church asked. "So what, you want to stay here because you like her? Is that it?"
Caboose took another look at Pinkie and his heart skipped a beat. "Yeah, I guess you could say that."
"What about me? Did you already forget what you just did to me?" Church yelled, becoming extremely angry.
Caboose stared at Church, not understanding what he had done wrong. Church let out a deep, angry sigh.
"I was happy. I had finally figured everything out. Then you yanked me out of the unit and ruined everything." Church said, voice wavering. "You ruined fucking EVERYTHING! Why the FUCK shouldn't I do the same?"
Caboose looked at the ground, taking that in. "I'm sorry." Caboose said simply, sniffling.
"What?" Church said, expecting a response along the lines of Tucker did it.
"I didn't mean to ruin anything." Caboose said, looking at Church who had tears in his eyes. "I just wanted to see you again. I didn't mean to hurt you. I always thought of you as my only friend."
"Listen. It's okay Caboose." Church sighed, walking up to Caboose to put his hand on his shoulder again. "I know you didn't mean to do anything. Accidents happen."
"Yeah." Caboose said, letting out a small laugh. "But they always seem to be caused by me."
"You give yourself too much credit." Church said, trying to comfort him. "Tucker fucks up way more than you do."
"Hey, yeah!" Caboose said, smiling and looking around. "I hate Tucker, he isn't here is he?"
"No, I don't know where he is right now." Church answered, slowly looking up. "And now that I think of that, I am kind of worried."
"I'm going to fucking diiiiiiiiiiiiie." Yelled Tucker, landing and hitting his crotch on a thick branch in the tree. "Fuck!"
"This isn't good." Caboose said.
"Tucker, what are you doing here?" Church asked.
"Well the first thing I did was slam my balls on a giant fucking branch. On the bright side, at least now I never have to use a condom." Tucker grunted, holding onto his crotch. "Bow-chika-bow-wowwwwwwWHYYYYYYY? Why my dick?"
"Yeah, I'm starting to feel better now." Caboose said.
"Biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitch." Grif yelled, landing on Tucker.
"Hey get off of me asshole!" Tucker kicked Grif off of him, just for Simmons to land on him right after.
"Man I hate you guys." Tucker groaned.
"The feeling is somewhat mutual." Grif said, getting up.
Tucker, Grif and Simmons got up, Tucker still holding onto his groin for dear life.
"Where are we?" Simmons asked. "Is this heaven?"
"No, it isn't." Sarge said. "This is uh... where is this exactly?"
Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Fluttershy, Pinkie and Rarity just stood there confused, unsure of what was happening. All they knew is that everyone who was tied to Caboose seemed to be just as wrong in the head.
"Hey blue, you okay over there?" Sarge yelled.
"What the fuck do you think asshole?" Tucker yelled back. "I squashed my love stick."
"What is with the ponies?" Grif asked. "And why are they staring at me."
"Why are YOU staring at US?" Rainbow Dash replied.
"Holy shit they can talk? That's pretty fucking rad."
"Why are you here?" Church asked.
"Well, that Carolina person said that you have been in here for far too long, so she sent us to get you." Simmons said.
"What? Why? We've only been in here for like two minutes." Church said.
"Yeah, she really wants you out of here." Simmons said.
"Yeah, and she sent a message with us to give it to you." Grif said. "She said she will kill us all if you don't come back in the next day. In hindsight I probably should have been a bit more worried."
"You aren't exactly the whining type." Sarge said. "You're more of the sit around and do nothing kind of type."
"You really know how I tick." Grif said with sarcastic sincerity.
"Well, we're having a little trouble getting Caboose back." Church explained.
"Why?" Simmons said.
Church motioned towards a blue pony sitting huddled up to a pink one.
"What?" Simmons asked. "What do the blue and pink ponies have to do with anything?"
"Hey Simmons." Caboose said. "How's it going?"
"Fine Caboose." Simmons said, his head whipping around a second later in realization. "Wait... Caboose... are you a horse."
"For fuck’s sake YES he is a horse." Church said. "Can we actually take a minute to focus for one second?"
"Dude, did you really just ask that question?" Tucker asked. "I mean don't you know ANYTHING about any of us?"
"You're right. I wasn't thinking. Why would I think any of you would be smart enough to-" But Church was cut short by a flash of white light. "What's happening?"
"I don't know!" Tucker said. "Is it a flashbang?"
"Fucked if I know." Church yelled, eyes closed due to the brightness.
"Oh fuck, I don't want to die! There's so many things I haven't NOT done yet. So many things I haven't slept on!" Grif yelled.
"Calm down and open your eyes." Said a serene, calming voice.
Soon the reds and blues opened their eyes to find themselves in the middle of a large room, with towering pillars and a red carpet leading to a door. On the other side, however, was a raised platform with a throne sitting on top. Sitting on the throne was a large horse, with a sparkling, flowing mane. The six sat in the middle of the room, gawking at the magnificent creature. They sat for a couple moments just staring. After what seemed like hours, someone spoke up.
"Hi! My name is Caboose. It's a pleasure to meet you. I like your hair."
"Thank you Caboose." She said. "My name is Princess Celestia, but you can call me Celestia if you wish."
"Oh okay. Hello Princess Celestia!" Caboose said, getting up.
"Why does shit keep happening to us?" Tucker said, still holding his crotch plate. "Why not anybody else in the galaxy. Surely god would have ran out of patience with us."
"I think you've been chosen for a reason." Celestia said, now letting out a small smirk. "Though I do not know what that reason could be."
Church let out a sigh then looked around. After a quick once over of everybody he looked back at Celestia. "So I assume you brought us here?"
"Yes." She replied simply.
"Mind telling us why?" Sarge asked. "I really don't like being in the same room as blues."
"That is why I brought you here." Celestia said.
"What? So I could hate the blues?" Sarge asked. "They really don't have to be in the same room as me and I'll still hate them."
Celestia sighed softly. She was already regretting bringing them here.
"My student Twilight Sparkle sent me a message telling me that some strange beings were fighting on her lawn." Celestia explained. "She wanted me to put a stop to it and that's what I plan on doing."
"Good luck with that." Sarge grunted. "We've been fighting for many long years and if you think you are going to stop it simply by asking, you have another thing coming."
"Who said anything about asking?" Celestia said, raising an eyebrow.
"What are you going to do with us?" Tucker asked.
Celestia said nothing and just smiled. The five soldiers soon found themselves surrounded by white mist and fell to the ground.
"She's going to kill us! Run for your life!" Grif yelled, standing up on two legs just to fall right back over.
It took a minute for the white shroud to dissipate but after it did something wonderful had happened.
"Why the fuck am I a horse?" Tucker asked.
"Hey you look just like me!" Caboose yelled. "Yay we're all pretty horses."
"What the? Did you just turn us into equines?" Simmons asked.
Celestia just nodded.
"Mind telling us why?" Tucker asked, stabilizing on all fours. "I mean, it's not like I haven't spent my fair share of time on all fours, but usually someone is under me."
"I did it to stop the fighting." Celestia said. "I think it is time you found your true selves, and you will not be able to turn back until you do."
"And how exactly are we going to find our true selves exactly?" Church asked.
Celestia stared at Church with a tight smile.
"Do you know what a cutie mark is?"
"What in Sam hell is a cutie mark?" Sarge said. "Sounds like something Donut would have."
"It kinda sounds like a gay bar." Grif chirped. "So yeah, now that you mention it Sarge, Donut does come to mind."
Celestia sighed and shook her head.
"A cutie mark is a symbol that appears on a ponies flank after they find out what their special skill is." Celestia said. "It is there to tell a story of their personality. No pony can have the same cutie mark, and they have to come naturally. They will not appear if you use anything to try and force it. It can only be received in time."
"Well Grif I can't say it was nice knowing you." Sarge said.
"What do you mean?" Grif asked.
"Well for starters you have no special skills, you have no personality and you have to work hard to get it." Sarge said. "And to top it off you're incompetent."
"Well I guess you're right Sarge. It seems like I'm fucked."
"I'm going to be sending a letter to each of the girls." Celestia said, shaking her head. "I don't think they could handle more than one of you at once so I am going to assign one to each of you. Caboose, you will stay with Pinkie Pie."
"Yay!" Caboose said. "Thank you kind lady."
"Sarge, you will be going to live with Applejack on her farm." Celestia said.
"Alright." Sarge grunted.
"Tucker, you will be going with Rainbow Dash." Celestia said.
"Is she hot?" Tucker asked, and felt as if he had just been stomped on his groin with the force of a million suns. "God dammit."
"Grif, you will be spending your time with Fluttershy."
"All right." Grif said, staring indifferently at Celestia.
"Simmons, you will help out around Rarities boutique."
"Alright fine. I'll see if I can do anything to help out to keep me busy."
"And Church. You will be staying with Twilight Sparkle." Celestia said.
"Fine. Whatever." Church said.
"Tucker. Grif. I have given you wings so you will be able to keep up with the poines you are going to be staying with. Church and Simmons will be given horns to match your soon-to-be mentors. Farewell my little ponies. I will send for you if I happen to need you."
They were soon surrounded by the white mist again and it brought them back to Twilight’s place. The girls were inside of the tree, finishing up with the letters they had received.
"What is Celestia doing making us watch these idiots?" Rainbow Dash said. "I have far more important things to do."
"I know what you mean." Rarity said. "I have a very important client coming to pick up her dresses in three days and I am nowhere near being complete."
"Well I'm afraid we have to, after all the princess told us to. There's no use complaining." Twilight pointed out.
"Fine, but it doesn't mean I have to like it." Rainbow Dash grumbled.
"I'm feeling happy about this!" Pinkie said. "How about you Fluttershy? How do you feel."
"Nervous. It's really hard to meet new ponies." Fluttershy said. "What if he hates me?"
"Why would he hate you Fluttershy?" Twilight asked.
"I don't know." Fluttershy replied. "I just have a feeling he will."
"How about you AJ? how do you feel about it?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"As long as he stays out of the way I don't mind." Applejack said, indifferent to the situation.
"Damn that light is bright." Church said, stumbling through the door into the library.
"Well, here they are." Twilight said, going up to the door. "Time to get working I guess."
"Whatever." Rainbow Dash said, flying out the door.
"Come on Caboose, let's go back to the Sugar Cube Corner." Pinkie said. "I'll try and find you a place to sleep."
"What is Sugar Cube Corner?" Caboose asked, following suit with Pinkie.
"It's the gingerbread house you silly goose!" Pinkie said.
"You live in a gingerbread house?" Caboose yelled. "That is the most amazing story I have ever heard. Can you tell it again?"
"At least someone seems to be happy with this." Twilight said.
"Yeah, whatever." Rainbow Dash said. "Come on Tucker I'll show you where I live."
"Okay, which direction is it?" He asked.
"This way." She replied, shooting up in the air.
"Dude what? I don't know how to fly." Tucker said, looking at his wings.
"Not my fault if you can't keep up." Rainbow Dash said, snickering at Tucker.
"That's the way you're going to be, huh? Well fine, two can play at that game." Tucker said, jumping in the air, flapping his wings trying to fly. "Hey, I'm doing it! Oh shit."
Tucker then slammed to the ground. Rainbow Dash fell to the ground laughing at him.
"Come on, you're making a fool out of yourself." Rainbow Dash laughed. "I'll have to try and teach you to fly overnight. If you think you can stay up."
"Oh that's okay, I'm used to staying up all night." Tucker said with a wink. “Bow chicka bow wow.”
Rainbow Dash then started walking with Tucker to a flat field to practice his flying.
"I hope you don't mind, but I'd rather walk to your place." Grif said. "I don't feel too thrilled about the prospect of grinding my face on the ground."
"That's okay." Fluttershy said softly. "I would have walked anyways."
Rarity then started to walk away. "Hey wait, don't forget me." Simmons walked after her.
"Listen, if it's all the same to you," Rarity started, continuing towards her boutique. "I just want to show you where you will be sleeping so I can get straight to work, okay?"
"Yeah, sure I guess." Simmons said, hurrying to catch up to Rarity who was still walking.
"Well, let's go Sarge." Applejack said. "I'll show you where you'll be hunkerin' down while you're here."
"Yes ma'am." Sarge said, walking silently with her.
"Well Church, I guess it's just us now." Twilight said.
"Yeah." Church said, walking into Twilight’s house. "Just us."
"I'll show you to where you'll be sleeping, okay?" Twilight said.
"Yeah whatever." Church grumbled.
It took Applejack and Sarge twenty minutes to get to Sweet Apple Acres. They walked in silence and that suited them both just fine. Applejack was nervous about having him here, he seemed outwardly abrasive and she worried what he would do to her family. Sarge didn't talk because he was glad for the peace and quiet. It was not until they had reached the gate that Applejack decided to speak.
"Well, here we are. Sweet Apple Acres." Applejack said with pride. "Home of the Apple family."
"Seems like a nice place." Sarge said. "I haven't been on a farm since my teenage years."
"Mhm." Applejack mumbled.
Sarge looked at her and he could tell that she did not trust him.
"Listen." Sarge said. "I don't mind that you don't trust me, but you could at least wait to get to know me before outright hating me."
"Well I guess back at Twi's you didn't give me much to go on." Applejack said. "You seemed to treat the others poorly."
"What? That's why you don't like me?" Sarge laughed. "Those idiots haven't worked one damn day in their entire lives. In fact, I'm sure Grif has found a way to work negative days."
"Even then, that's no reason t' regard them that way." She said, walking up to the barn. "Oh well this is where you'll be sleepin' tonight. I'll go get you a cover t' keep yourself warm."
"No need to go through so much trouble." Sarge said, walking up to a pile of hay. "I've been trained to sleep in irregular conditions. A cover would be an insult to my old drill sergeant."
Applejack looked at him quizzically then nodded as she turned to leave the barn. Sarge let out a sigh and started messing with the pile of hay until it was all bunched up. He turned around and dropped his back on it with his forelegs behind his head and he let out a wistful sigh. He closed his eyes and soon drifted off, snoring lightly, sleeping for the rest of the night. The next morning Sarge's eyes snapped open at the sound of a loud bang and he jumped to his feet. "We're under attack!" Sarge yelled, grabbing for something by his side, then started frowning. "Damn. I miss my shotgun."
"Are you okay?" A small filly asked.
"Yeah don't mind me." Sarge said calmly, walking towards her. "What's your name?"
"My name is Applebloom, I'm Applejack’s sister." Applebloom said. "She told me t' wake you on up."
"I guess a thank you is in order then." Sarge said, starting to walk out of the barn. "Pleasure to meet you Applebloom."
Sarge extended his hoof and Applebloom met his greeting.
"I like you." Applebloom said with a smile. "Mah sister said you weren't to be trusted, but you seem alright to me. I should tell her she was just bein' silly."
Sarge shook his head.
"Don't give her any trouble." Sarge said. "She is right not to trust me because I'm a new uh, stallion in the place and she has been ordered to make sure I don't do anything stupid."
"Hating somebody for just havin' the off chance of doing somethin' stupid ain't right though." Applebloom retorted.
"Normally I would agree with you." Sarge nodded thoughtfully. "But something tells me she wasn't worried about me. Something tells me she was worried about what I might do to you."
And with that, Sarge left the little filly to her thoughts. He then saw Applejack and a tall, muscular stallion kicking trees.
"Could have told me you were out here working." Sarge said, hopping the small fence to talk to Applejack. "I would have helped."
"I would have thought this wouldn't be your line of work." Applejack said while kicking a tree, making the apples fall down into buckets that are circling the tree. "So I thought I would let you sleep."
"Who's the big guy?" Sarge asked, looking at the large red horse.
"Oh that's Big Mac. He's my brother. He is a good worker, but he dun’ talk much." Applejack said, collecting the apples that missed the buckets and throwing them in.
"I'm impressed! Finally some reds that show some initiative. I think I'm beginning to like this place." Sarge said, examining a tree. "So you just... kick it?"
"Eeyup." Big Mac said, not turning to look at Sarge.
"You don't have to do anything Sarge. This is our family’s farm, not yours." Applejack grunted, moving to another tree.
"Please, as long as I'm here I consider myself to be a part of this family." Sarge said.
"It's not right. I couldn't make a guest do any work." Applejack said.
"That's as good of an excuse as any." Sarge laughed smugly.
"What do you mean by that?" Applejack asked, raising her brow.
"Nothing. I think that you're worried that I'll outshine you."
Applejack looked at him and smiled. "Why don't you put your legs where your mouth is tough guy. I say that you drop before I do."
"You're on." Sarge grunted, already kicking the tree, knocking down all the apples. "But I warn you, I know I'm going to win."
"Why's that?" Applejack laughed.
"Because!" He said, already finishing up with his fourth tree. "I get to pretend the trees are Grif."
Applejack couldn't help but let out a sly smile. Big Mac even let out a small laugh, even though he didn’t know who Grif was. Sarge, Applejack and Big Mac kept bucking trees until the sun started to set. Applejack had emptied many trees, but Sarge was working faster. He had already caught up with Applejack and would soon be surpassing her.
"Y'know, I'm really surprised." Applejack said, wiping sweat off of her head.
"Why's that?" Sarge grunted, kicking another tree.
"Well, I just expected you to be a lay about. I didn't think someone of your age would..." She trailed off, realizing what she just said. "Er, sorry. No disrespect meant."
"None taken." Sarge said. "I know my age. Time may be trying to slow me down, but it has another thing coming if it thinks it can catch up with S-dog."
Applejack nodded and stopped kicking trees.
"Alright boys, time to pack it in." Applejack said, rubbing her hind legs.
"But I was just starting to have fun!" Sarge said, kicking another tree, but then came to a stop.
"Hey I don't want you passing from a heat stroke out on us." Applejack laughed. "Sarge, I just wanna say that I appreciate you helping us out."
"Don't worry about it." Sarge grunted, walking up to her and Big Mac. "Say, who do you think kicked more trees?"
"I reckon it was a tie." Applejack said.
"I could have sworn I whupped you at it." Sarge laughed.
"Say, you feeling hungry?" Applejack said, chuckling while raising her hoof to him.
"I am feeling a bit peckish." Sarge said, grabbing her hoof and shaking it.
"Well, we've prepared a lot of food." Applejack said, beginning to smile. "How much d'you reckon you could eat?"
"So, uh, Fluttershy was it?" Grif asked.
Fluttershy turned her head slightly and nodded.
"So what do you do around here?" Grif asked.
Fluttershy looked at Grif, "Well, if you get bored you can always go to the town and-"
"No." Grif said, shaking his head slightly. "I mean, like, what do you do specifically?"
"Well." Fluttershy said. "I'm really good with animals so other ponies sometimes leave their pets with me while they're away."
"That's pretty cool." Grif said with a smile.
"I think you are the first one to ever say that." Fluttershy said, letting out a small smile of her own.
"I wonder why?" Grif asked. "I think animals are awesome. Take cats for example, all they do all day is sleep, and at night they grab a bite to eat and go right back to sleep. Who wouldn't want to live that life?"
"I actually think being a tree would be nice. You get to bask in the sunlight. And with enough care you can grow into something beautiful."
"You know what? I change my answer. I think I want to be a tree now," Grif said, sighing happily. "I think I'm going to like this place." At that moment, Sarge suddenly grinned for reasons unknown to him.
Fluttershy’s cottage entered their view as they rounded a corner. "So this is your place..." Grif trailed off.
"Yes. Why? Is it bad?" Fluttershy asked meekly.
"Not at all." Grif said, rubbing the back of his neck. "Seems like a nice place."
"Oh good. I was afraid you wouldn't like it..." Fluttershy said, letting out a small.
"Why worry about what other people think?" Grif said. "I mean, look at me. I don't give a fuck about anything and my life is great."
"My life is good too..." Fluttershy said.
"Sure it's good." Grif said. "But is it great? Have you ever sat down one day and decided to just not do anything at all?"
"Oh no, I could never do that!" Fluttershy gasped. "I have so many animals to look after every day, I can't just not do anything."
"Animals live in the wild with no help from anybody." Grif said. "I think they could handle a day of being left alone. You should try it sometime."
"Let's go inside." Fluttershy said, shaking her head.
"Okay, yeah."
Fluttershy opened the door and walked in, Grif following right behind. Grif took a quick look around and saw that there was a bird cage, a bed for a dog and a small structure for a cat to lay about in. He then looked around and saw a couch on the other side of the room and smiled.
"I'm sorry, but I don't have any spare beds here..." Fluttershy said, hunching down.
"That's okay, I'm perfectly fine with sleeping on a couch." Grif said, walking to the opposite side of the room.
"Are you sure?" Fluttershy said. "I could try and fin-"
"Nah, don't worry about it. It'll just be like my days in college... before I dropped out." Grif assured her. "And you got to stick to your guns. If you don't have a bed, make due. Don't go out of your way for everybody. Nobody likes a doormat. Just look at Simmons! He works his ass off and nobody pays him any attention."
"Isn't Simmons your friend?" Fluttershy asked, frowning slightly at Grif’s remark.
"Yeah, I guess." Grif said. "But we aren't exactly what you would call a band of brothers. Sure we've been through hell and back, not to mention Sarge. We were together, but other than that..."
Fluttershy stared blankly at him then shook her head. "I hope you sleep well." Fluttershy said, quietly cutting him off.
"Yeah, you too." Grif said, closing his eyes.
What a weird pony, Fluttershy thought to herself. How can you be happy if you have nothing to care about?
Grif was awoken by what he thought to be something dropping on his chest, but when he opened his eyes he found himself face to face with a bunny.
"Hey little guy, mind getting off so I can go back to sleep?" Grif said, pushing the bunny off of him.
The bunny promptly jumped back on his chest and thumped his feet.
"Dude, what the hell is your problem?" Grif said, now sitting up. "I'm trying to sleep here."
The bunny shook his head, jumped up and kicked Grif in the jaw. Grif grunted and rolled off the couch. The bunny stood smirking on the couch and it then curled up and went to sleep. "What the fuck just happened?"
"Oh I'm sorry." Fluttershy said, walking in holding many bags of animal feed. "That's Angel. He's my pet bunny. I forgot to mention that he likes to sleep on that couch for his afternoon nap."
"Yeah well I was having my afternoon nap too." Grif said, turning angrily at the bunny who had replaced him on the couch. He then let his shoulders sag. "Ah what the hell, I'm up now anyways. What are you doing?"
"I'm giving everyone their lunch." Fluttershy said. "I could make you something if you want."
"Really? That would be awesome." Grif said happily. "I haven't eaten in nine years!"
"Oh my," Fluttershy gasped, "a whole nine years?"
"Figure of speech." Grif said, rolling his eyes.
"Oh okay." Fluttershy said. "Follow me to the kitchen and I will make you a sandwich after I feed the animals."
"Alright." Grif said excitedly, following her into the kitchen. When she opened the door, he was surprised to see that the room was packed with animals.
"Wow, it's like you have your own petting zoo." Grif said sarcastically.
"Thank you."
Grif rolled his eyes.
"It will just take a minute for me to feed them all." Fluttershy said, opening a package of food, pouring it into a bowl.
"Here let me help." Grif said, grabbing another bag.
"Thank you." Fluttershy said. "What do you plan on doing after?"
"After what?" Grif asked.
"After you've eaten." Fluttershy replied.
"Once you get to know me, you'll feel pretty stupid asking me that." Grif laughed.
"Dammit." Tucker muttered, covered with scrapes and bruises. "This sucks, do we have to do this right now?."
"If you want to sleep in an actual bed, then yes." Rainbow Dash stated haughtily, laying on a cloud with her arms behind her head. "But I heard the ground can be pretty comfy too."
"Lavernious Tucker does NOT sleep on the ground." Tucker yelled, shooting up into the air. "Hey I'm doing it!"
Tucker then grabbed onto the cloud and stopped flapping his wings before he got on.
"Fuck!" Tucker yelled in despair as he landed on his head and Rainbow Dash burst with laughter.
"You're pretty good at flying, you know that?" Rainbow Dash said, wiping a tear out of her eye.
"You could help me ya know." Tucker complained, getting up.
"Hey I just have to watch you. Celestia said nothing about helping." Rainbow Dash said with a smirk.
"This is my first day here, how the hell am I supposed to learn to fly in ten minutes?" Tucker yelled.
"Trust me, there's a LOT of things I could do in ten SECONDS flat." Rainbow Dash boasted.
"Same with me, they just usually involve women and a lot of moaning." Tucker said with a smirk.
Rainbow Dash raised an eyebrow and Tucker winked at her. Rainbow Dash then shook her head, understanding what he meant. "If you think you're getting any, you are going to be sorely disappointed."
"Oh now I understand. You're a butch aren't you?" Tucker said.
"Excuse me?" Rainbow Dash yelled with anger.
"You know what I mean. You obviously have a thing for ladies." Tucker said. "But don't worry about it, I find that stuff hot. Maybe we can even snag a menage a trois. Bow-chika-bow-w-"
Rainbow Dash snarled and jumped on the cloud, sending a lightning bolt which struck Tucker.
"Ow! What the fuck was that for?" Tucker asked, then got up. "Oh right. But hey, you aren't being any help so you will have to suffer through me." Rainbow Dash opened her mouth to object. "Princess’ orders." Tucker quickly interjected with a tight smirk.
Rainbow Dash glared and they both started to laugh.
"You know, you're an alright guy." Rainbow Dash said. "Aside from the whole idiot thing."
"I was about to say the same thing to you." Tucker said. "But replace idiot with bitch."
Rainbow Dash sighed and flew to the ground.
"Alright I was tired of waiting for you anyways." Rainbow Dash said. "Okay the first thing you need to do is focus. Without focus, you may as well just quit right now."
"Oh really? I thought the first step would be to make sweet, sweet love." Tucker said sarcastically.
"Focus." Rainbow Dash grunted, striking Tucker on the back of the head.
"Dammit, alright. I'm tired of getting hurt anyways." Tucker said, straightening up.
"Good. The second step is to start flapping your wings." Rainbow Dash explained.
"Oh really? That wasn't obvious." Tucker said.
"I could just fly away right now you know." Rainbow Dash said.
"Yeah." Tucker agreed, then winked at Rainbow Dash. "But you won't."
"Are you finally going to start listening and shut up?" Rainbow Dash said, smiling softly.
"Sure." Tucker said. "If you actually start giving me advice that will help."
"Fine." Rainbow Dash said, picking up Tucker and flying straight up in the air.
"Wait, what are you doing? Are you crazy?" Tucker yelled against the pressure of the wind.
"You want advice or not?" Rainbow Dash asked, stopping miles above the ground.
"Well, yeah." Tucker said.
"Here's your advice." Rainbow Dash yelled, dropping Tucker. "Fly."
"You're fucking kidding me!" Tucker yelled, falling down.
He judged the distance from the ground and he guessed he had roughly thirty seconds. He started to fall faster as he turned his body to a nose dive.
"This better fucking work!" He yelled, opening up his wings.
The quickly approaching ground started to grow with less speed as he pulled up from the dive and started travelling parallel to the ground. But his victory was short lived as he was now flying straight towards a tree. He flapped his wings once, with as much force as he could muster which allowed him to soar just out of harm’s way.
"Hey... I'm doing it!" Tucker yelled "You're going to eat it now Dash."
Tucker flipped on his side and forced his head up, which made him do a sharp turn, heading straight for Rainbow Dash. Rainbow Dash yelped, quickly turning around to fly away from Tucker. She flew as fast as she could for ten seconds and she turned around, expecting Tucker to have fallen behind. What she didn't know, however, was that Tucker had actually been moving faster than her. Tucker wrapped his legs around her and plummeted towards the ground.
"Got you!"
"That's what you think." Rainbow Dash smirked.
She then used all of her force to pull up from the downwards spiral and exerted so much pressure that Tucker felt as if he had just exploded forward, and when he looked behind him he could see a multicolored explosion, with a trail of rainbows leading right up to them.
"What are you doing?" Tucker asked.
"What?" Rainbow Dash yelled, throwing him off of her. "Afraid you can't keep up?"
"Nope." Tucker yelled smugly back at her. "I'm afraid you can't keep up with ME."
Tucker then pulsed forward, using an unknown source of energy and Rainbow heard a loud bang, much like the sound of thunder. She turned around and saw a trail of white light and electricity pushing Tucker towards her.
"You've got to be kidding me." Rainbow Dash said, jaw dropping.
She shook her head and pushed forward, trying to escape Tucker. She felt a small nip of electricity on her ankle and when she turned she saw Tucker holding onto it.
"Give up yet?" Tucker asked.
"Not quite." Rainbow Dash laughed.
Rainbow Dash then stopped abruptly and kicked her leg in front of her, using Tucker’s speed against him. Tucker realized this and got launched forward screaming. He then slammed into a tree upside down and slowly slid down. Rainbow Dash flew down to Tucker who was now on the ground.
"Feel like saying anything now?" Rainbow Dash laughed.
"No, not really. Nothing... other than I totally schooled you!"
"That's because I was going easy on you." Rainbow Dash said.
"So was I." Tucker retorted, getting up. "My back is fucking killing me though."
"Let's go back to my place now." Rainbow Dash said, lowering her hoof and Tucker grabbed it. "I think you've earned the right to sleep there."
"Oh yeah, time for some hot pony action." Tucker exclaimed.
Rainbow Dash blushed a little then shook it off and laughed. "Not quite. You can sleep in my bed, but that's because I don't have anywhere else for you to sleep. We aren't going to do anything."
"Aw, way to be a buzz kill." Tucker said with a smile. "Oh well, my balls still probably haven't healed yet anyways."
"Quit being a cry baby and let's go." Rainbow Dash said, flying away, closely followed by Tucker.
Rarity kept wishing that he would just decide to leave, but he didn't. She didn't need a strange stallion that she does not know to come in and interrupt her work. She kept wondering why Celestia had made Simmons need to stay with her. Simmons, however, did not speak because he thought since all the women he had been involved with recently (Tex and Carolina) had been completely crazy nut jobs, that he should not expect differently of this one, even if she was a pony. Rarity and Simmons walked for half an hour in complete and total silence. That suited them both fine. But after the walk they find themselves in front of the Carousel Boutique.
"Here it is." Rarity said, opening the door. "There is a couch by the door for you to sleep. I apologize for the mess. I've been meaning to clean it up but I have a very important client coming in the next few days and I need to get working on their order."
"Okay." Simmons said, looking at the mess with a curious eye. "Do you need help with anything?"
"No." Rarity said shutting the door to her room.
Simmons let out a brief sigh and sat on the couch. He then looked around the room and shook his head. He then decided that the best option was to sleep until morning. The problem was however, that he was restless and did not know why.
A couple hours later, while Rarity was in her room, sewing some fabrics together, "Yes, this is coming together fabulously! It just needs one more thing." Rarity said, reaching into a box of gems and felt around. "Nononono this won't do, this won’t do at all. Where is that sapphire?"
She then let out a sad sigh, having a feeling that it was lost in the clutter downstairs. Rarity stared at the dress thinking if it could be pulled off without it. "No." Rarity said with determination. "They are paying for perfection."
And with that she went downstairs to look through the mess to see if she could find it. But when she opened the door, she saw Simmons on the ground with a small cloth, rubbing away some grime off the floor. Rarity slowly went downstairs and looked at Simmons.
"You cleaned the place up?" Rarity asked quietly.
"Oh yeah, I hope you don't mind." Simmons said, not expecting her to talk to him. "I just have a small and extremely severe case of obsessive compulsive disorder. If something isn't as good as it can be then I can't sleep, and the only way to fix that is to make it look better."
"I completely understand." Rarity said. "If the end product of one of my pieces is off by the slightest bit then I try again. In fact that's why I'm down here. I'm looking for a small sapphire, maybe the size of my hoof. Did you happen to see it while you were tidying up?"
"I think so, hang on." Simmons said, reaching in a box that he tucked under the table. "Is this it?"
"Yes!" Rarity exclaimed. "I can't even begin to thank you Simmons! Without this sapphire my whole dress would have been ruined!"
"Sorry, it won't happen again..." Simmons said, with a sigh. "Wait a second. Did you say thank you?"
"Yes, why wouldn't I?" Rarity said. "It would have taken me hours to find it, and thanks to you my dress is saved!"
"It's just that usually when I try to do something helpful, Sarge usually yells at me telling me I'm wasting my time." Simmons said.
"Well maybe Sarge just needs to learn how to appreciate you." Rarity said, kissing Simmons on his cheek, who held back a nervous blush. "Say, are you feeling tired?"
"Not particularly." Simmons said quietly. "Why?"
"Well now that my dress is finished with this sapphire I can start working on the other thing they ordered." Rarity said, inspecting Simmons. "And I do believe you are the same build as she ordered so that would make everything a lot easier."
"Sure, why not." Simmons said, walking up the stairs, then slowing. "You won't use needles will you?"
"Well, yes." Rarity said, stopping on top of the stairs. "Why?"
"Well, it's just that I'm afraid of them." Simmons said. "So I'm kind of nervous about flinching and getting stabbed by them."
"Well I do have a small spell I’ve been working on." Rarity said. "What it does when I use it is freezes the pony in place, constraining them. They can still talk and breathe safely though, so you don't have to worry."
"Alright, why not." Simmons said, walking to the top of the steps.
"Just take a step up on the platform there while I grab some materials." Rarity said.
Rarity grabbed a needle, thread and some black silk. She saw Simmons staring at the needle so she decided to start using the spell. When she started to do it, her horn started glowing and Simmons found himself unable to jump backwards from surprise.
"Hey, I think it's working!" Simmons said.
Rarity just flashed him a quick smile and went to work. She worked on the suit for an hour, holding Simmons in place the entire time, which was beginning to drain her energy. Simmons looked at Rarity who was growing pale.
"Maybe we should stop for the night, that holding spell seems to be making you tired." Simmons said, trying to get her to stop. "The dress can wait until tomorrow."
"Just one more hour." Rarity yawned. "It's almost done."
Simmons then closed his eyes, focusing on breaking the spell, and after a lot of effort Simmons horn started to glow. Rarity took no notice until Simmons made the spell wear off.
"What did you do that for?" Rarity yawned. "The dress is looking great and it just needs a few more touches."
"The spell was beginning to wear you out." Simmons said, but before Rarity could speak out shook his head. "I like making everything perfect, but working on anything while you're tired might make it not go as well as you planned."
Rarity nodded her head and took the incomplete silk suit off of Simmons.
"I suppose you're right." Rarity said, voice hoarse. "It can wait until tomorrow. Sleep well Simmons. And thanks again for all the help."
"No problem. Good night." Simmons yawned, walking down stairs and climbing onto the couch.
"Well Church, I guess it's just us now." Twilight said.
"Yeah." Church said, walking into Twilight’s house. "Just us."
"I'll show you to where you'll be sleeping, okay?" Twilight said.
"Yeah whatever." Church grumbled.
"What's with all the talking Twi?" Spike said, coming down the stairs yawning and stretching his arms. "Who's the new guy?"
"Oh this is Church. He's a new stallion in town." Twilight said. "Church, meet Spike. He is my assistant and one of my oldest friends. He's also a baby dragon."
"You don't say..." Church said.
Spike and Church glared at each other apprehensively, seemingly trying to read each others thoughts.
"Hi..." Church grunted.
"Hey..." Spike grunted back.
"Ookaaaaay." Twilight said nervously, sensing the tension in the room. "Church if you follow me I'll show you where you'll be sleeping tonight."
"If it's all the same to you I think I'm going to go for a walk." Church said, walking towards the door. "Y'know, to clear my mind a little."
"Oh okay." Twilight said.
Church opened the door and left, closing the door behind him.
"Twilight, don’t you think that guy seems a little... off?" Spike said.
"What do you mean Spike?" Twilight asked.
"I'm not sure." Spike said. "All I know for certain is that I don't trust him. You should keep a close eye on him Twilight."
"Well, that's what Princess Celestia has asked us to do. Each of us got a stranger that we have to keep an eye on."
"Where did they come from?" Spike asked.
"I don't know." Twilight said, looking at the door to her house. "But I think I need to find out."
"What the fuck was Caboose thinking?" Church muttered to himself, walking towards a stream.
He then sat down and watched the water flow gently down the stream. For a moment, he swore he saw Tex. He brought his hoof forward, reaching for her, but before he touched the water he retracted his leg and let out a sigh.
"I'll miss you Tex." Church said to the reflection, which then seemingly drifted away.
"Who are you talking to?" Twilight asked, calmly approaching Church.
"Nobody." Church said. "Don't worry about it. What are you doing out here?"
"I came to find you." Twilight said.
"Why?" Church asked bluntly. "Am I not allowed to have some peace for once in my damned life?"
Twilight was about to say something but then lowered her head, breaking eye contact with Church.
"Oh. Sorry, I'll leave you be." Twilight said.
Church watched her turn around. "Listen, Twilight, I'm sorry." Church said. "I didn't mean to be rude. It's just everything that has gone on in the past couple years is starting to take its toll on me."
"Have things really been going that bad with you?" Twilight asked.
"You don't even know the start of it." Church grunted.
"I'd like to." Twilight said, intrigued to hear more about the stallion that she had to watch.
Church looked in her eyes and saw that she was genuinely interested. "Might as well take a seat, because it's a long story." Church said, sitting down. Twilight followed his lead. "I guess it all started back in a canyon called Blood Gulch..."
Church then spent the next few hours recalling and telling Twilight about everything that had happened, not leaving anything out. He told her about the freelancers, the epsilon unit and how it related to him, how he was actually an artificial intelligence based off of someone from the original’s past. Twilight listened intently, trying to soak in as much as she could. She flinched occasionally at the more intense parts. She especially flinched when Church told her that he witnessed the Meta stab Tex in the face with the unit, which he thought had killed her.
"And when I finally let her go, the others dragged me out to be face to face with Carolina who told me she wanted to kill the director and, effectively, me." Church said, shivering. "And as if it could get any worse, Caboose then plugged himself into the unit and ended up dragging me right back in, except this time the world was filled with bright ponies, and now I'm sitting on the ground talking to one of them."
"Wow." Twilight said, at a loss of words.
"Yeah." Church said. "Wow."
"When you told me things were bad, I assumed you were telling the truth." Twilight said. "But this? That is a lot for one pony to handle..."
"Tell me about it." Church said, standing up, reaching a hoof towards Twilight.
"So how haven't you... well..." Twilight started to ask, grabbing his hoof to hoist herself up.
"Died?" Church asked, which Twilight responded to with a nod. "As I've said, I'm an artificial intelligence, not quite a real person, but still somehow holding onto some degree of humanity."
"So you can never die?" Twilight asked curiously.
"Pretty much." Church replied honestly.
"Do you still love her?" Twilight asked. "Tex, I mean."
"Yeah." Church sighed, starting towards Twilights place. "But I'm not sure if I would really call it that. I mean, I was programmed to love her, but that's basically how I feel. I feel that it isn't a real love, that it's being forced down my throat."
Twilight nodded at Church, trying to understand what he meant.
"So that's my story, and I pretty much told you everything I could." Church said.
"You know, I read a book about love once." Twilight said. "One of the lines really stuck to me and it made me think."
"Oh yeah?" Church said, letting out a depressing laugh. "What did it say?"
"It said: A great love is a lot like a good memory. When it's there, and you know it's there but it's just out of your reach, it can be all that you think about. You can focus on it, and try to force it, but the more you do, the more you seem to push it away. But if you're patient, and you hold still, maybe... just maybe..."
"It'll come to you." Church finished, smiling brightly at Twilight who was smiling in return.
"What is Sugar Cube Corner?" Caboose asked, following suit with Pinkie.
"It's the gingerbread house, you silly goose!" Pinkie said.
"You live in a gingerbread house?" Caboose yelled. "That is the most amazing story I have ever heard. Can you tell it again?"
"Maybe later." Pinkie giggled happily.
They were a short walk away from getting to the Sugar Cube Corner, but Pinkie Pie decided to take the long route.
"Are we there yet?" Caboose asked, getting tired of walking.
"Nope!" Pinkie said happily.
Caboose kept quiet for half a minute.
"How about now?" Caboose asked.
Pinkie rolled her eyes playfully.
"We're here." Pinkie said.
"Yay!" Caboose said, starting to run to the closest house.
"I was kidding Caboose." Pinkie said, jumping on him, tackling him to the ground and started laughing. "I thought you knew what it looked like."
"Oh." Caboose laughed with a yawn. "Now I just feel silly."
"Maybe I shouldn't have taken the long way." Pinkie said with a smile. "You're really starting to look pooped."
"I don't mind." Caboose said. "I like walking with you!"
Pinkie blushed and got up off of Caboose and started to take the direct route to the Sugar Cube Corner. Caboose got up and quickly hopped next to her.
"You know, as much as I love Twilight and the others, I feel as if I can't really be myself around them. But with you I feel as if I can really let loose."
"Sometimes I like to pretend that I am really a superhero around others." Caboose said. "They usually tell me to stop after I keep asking where the phone booth is, but I still find it fun."
Pinkie and Caboose soon arrived at their set destination and Pinkie opened the door.
"You're really fun, you know that Caboose?" Pinkie asked.
"Thank you Pinkie." Caboose blushed, which made Pinkie giggle.
Pinkie then leaned in and kissed Caboose on the cheek, which made him fall to the ground again.
"I'm really glad you're here Caboose." Pinkie giggled, helping him up. "I don't think I've ever met anypony like you."
"I don't think I've ever met anypony like me either." Caboose said, letting out a large yawn. "I'm tired."
"I can see that." Pinkie giggled. "We don't have a guest bedroom so I guess you'll just have to sleep on my bed."
Caboose stared at her passively for a couple seconds, then his face broke out into a huge grin.
"Oh boy!" He yelled. "A sleep over!"
Pinkie giggled at Caboose, she then walked to and opened the door to her room, which had cupcakes plastered over everything. Caboose smiled and then started to jump on the bed. Pinkie giggled and started jumping on the bed with him. Caboose then fell backwards on the bed and yawned again. Pinkie stopped jumping and laid down on the bed next to Caboose.
"Good night Boosey."
"Good *yawn* night Pinkie." Caboose said, closing his eyes.
Pinkie looked at Caboose, who was already drifting off. She smiled and laid her head next to his and soon fell asleep, cuddled up to Caboose. Caboose woke up the next morning and looked around the room. He looked next to him and noticed that Pinkie wasn't there.
"Pinkie?" Caboose asked. "Where are you?"
"I'm baking right now, I'll be up there in a sec." Pinkie said from downstairs.
"Pinkie?" Caboose asked, looking down at the floor. "When did you become the ground?"
The door to the room then opened and mrs. Cake poked her head in.
"Oh, hello Caboose. How are you today?" Mrs. Cake asked.
"Oh hello mrs. Icing lady! I'm doing great." Caboose replied, then switched to a quiet whisper, "Did you know that Pinkie Pie is the ground?"
"What are you talking about?" Mrs. Cake asked, looking at him with a raised brow. "Pinkie is downstairs working."
"Oh. OH!" Caboose said. "She lives and works here?"
"Come on downstairs and we'll get you a bite to eat." Mrs. Cake nodded.
"I'm really hungry though." Caboose said, stomach rumbling. "Do you think I could have more than one bite?"
Mrs. Cake smiled and shook her head. "Sure Caboose, come on down."
Caboose jumped off the bed and sprinted out the door, making his way downstairs to see Pinkie. He then ran out the front door and looked around.
"This house is huge. Pinkie are you here?" Caboose yelled, not realizing he was outside.
"I'm over here silly." Pinkie said, taking some baked goods out of the oven. "Want a cupcake?"
"A cupcake... for breakfast?" Caboose said quietly. THIS IS THE GREATEST PLACE EVER!"
Caboose ran back in the house and grabbed a couple cupcakes and started munching on them.
"Boy, you're really hungry." Pinkie said, taking a cupcake for herself.
Caboose stuffed the rest of his cupcakes into his mouth, starting to choke.
"Ya ah eehly wah ‘ungy." Caboose then swallowed them and cleared his throat. "Sorry, my mouth was full, I do that sometimes. I said yeah I really was hungry."
Pinkie smirked and shook her head. "Well, I'm done for the day. What do you want to do?"
"I don't know. What can we do?"
"Well, Applejack stopped by and picked up a lot of treats because she challenged Sarge to a eating contest. We could go and watch them." Pinkie suggested.
"Hey yeah! That sounds fun!" Caboose said, grabbing Pinkies hoof.
Pinkie just smiled and walked out the door with him, making their way to Sweet Apple Acres. They soon got there and saw a small crowd standing in a circle, most of whom were part of the Apple family. Caboose and Pinkie managed to squeeze ahead of everybody to watch the contest.
"Twenty bits on the new guy." One stallion said.
"I'll take that bet." Another said, shaking his head.
Sarge cracked his neck, and was getting ready.
"Hey Sarge!" Caboose said, standing next to him.
"Oh, hey Caboose." Sarge said, not turning to greet him, focused on the upcoming battle of stomachs. "Come to watch me win?"
"Yeah, I guess so." Caboose replied with a smile.
"Y'all ready to shut up and eat Sarge?" Applejack asked with a grin.
"Depends." Sarge said, staring Applejack down. "You ready to lose?"
"In yer dreams, hot head." Applejack replied.
"On the count of three, you will shake hooves and then begin. You have fifteen different dishes to finish. First one to finish wins." Granny Smith said. "One..."
Applejack and Sarge both took a seat at the table, eyeing each other intensely.
"Ready?" Applejack asked.
"More than you'll ever be." Sarge replied with a smile. Applejack then glared at Sarge.
"Two..." Granny Smith said.
Applejack started rubbing her hooves together and Sarge put his hoof behind his head and cracked his neck.
"You're going down." Applejack said.
Sarge just smiled and shook his head.
"Uh... what number was I at again?" Granny Smith asked.
"Muffin." Caboose replied playfully.
"Oh right, three!" Granny Smith said.
"Good luck Sarge." Applejack said, putting her hoof over the table to shake.
"Don't need it. But you will." Sarge said, grabbing Applejack’s hoof.
He then pulled her forward, making her gasp and lose her balance and focus. Sarge took advantage of this and slammed his face onto the plate, stuffing in as much as he could. Applejack quickly glanced at him and set to work. Applejack looked up after she had finished her first plate and saw that Sarge was completing his third plate. Applejack grunted as she grabbed the pie that was on her plate and shoved it in her mouth and started chewing. She then slowly put her hooves on her throat and started choking. Sarge noticed this and jumped over the table.
"Applejack!" Applebloom yelled worriedly.
Applejack was now on the ground, wheezing and flailing her back legs, eyes watering. Sarge knelt next to her and stared at her, not knowing what to do. So he started to push her chest. On the second push, Applejack stopped choking and pushed Sarge to the ground and jumped back on the bench and grabbed a third plate and started eating. Sarge glared at her, then jumped over the table and started eating again. Sarge and Applejack were soon neck and neck. Seven finished for Applejack. Nine for Sarge. Ten for Applejack. Just as Sarge finished his fourteenth plate, Granny Smith rung the bell. Sarge dropped his plate, leaned back and burped.
"Looks like I get twenty bits." Said one pony in the background.
The other pony looked down and mumbled, handing some coins to the other pony.
"Applejack won!" Granny Smith exclaimed, holding up Applejack’s leg.
"Looks like you were just blowin' hot air, huh Sarge?" Applejack asked smugly.
"Yeah well, you cheated." Sarge mumbled.
"So did you." Applejack retorted.
Sarge glared at Applejack, face like stone. He then let out a rough laugh. Soon Applejack burst out with laughter.
"Y'know, it's nice to have somebody who can pose a challenge to me." Applejack said.
"I know what you mean." Sarge said back, extending his hoof to shake, for real this time. "Tell you what, you agree that I smoked you collecting apples, then I'll agree that you won the eating contest."
"Sounds fine with me." Applejack said with a laugh. "Let's say we make it best two outta three?"
"I was thinking three out of five." Sarge said with a laugh.
"You got it pardner." Applejack said with a nod.
"That was a close one Applejack!" Pinkie said, congratulating her.
"Yeah it was, wasn't it?" Applejack said back to Pinkie.
"I was so scared." Caboose said. "When you were choking on that pie, I thought you were possessed by a demon baby."
"Oh? And what exactly is wrong with bab-" Applejack started to ask with her brow raised, but was cut short by Sarge, who was holding her mouth shut shaking his head viciously.
"That would have been an extremely terrible mistake on your part." Sarge grunted.
"Oh? And why is that?" Applejack asked laughing, but when she looked at Sarge, she could see the slightest bit of fear in his eyes.
"You do not want to know. Just trust me."
Applejack stared at him and just nodded, starting to feel a bit nervous. What could Caboose do that would scare Sarge so much? He seems extremely brave...
"So what do you wanna do now?" Pinkie asked Caboose.
"Oh, I don't know." Caboose said. "How about we see what Sarge is doing?"
Sarge looked down and facehoofed while shaking his head slowly.
"Well Sarge, what do you reckon we do now?" Applejack asked. "We've almost gone an' finished harvestin' the apples thanks t' you so we have some time to waste."
"I don't know." Sarge grunted, and then sighed. "I miss Donut. He would have had something to do by now."
"How about we go see what the others are up to?" Pinkie asked.
"Sounds good to me." Applejack said. "Sarge?"
"Yeah, whatever. Might as well make sure the others haven't blown anything up."
"I just realized something." Caboose said. "I'm not wearing any pants."
"Caboose, no one is wearing pants." Sarge sighed.
"Oh my gosh!" Caboose exclaimed, looking at every pony and stallion. "No one is wearing pants!"
Pinkie Pie started giggling. Applejack and Sarge then looked at each other and started laughing as well. Soon all of them were on the ground laughing hysterically.
"Ah. Caboose, you're a weird one, you know that?" Sarge said, trying to stop laughing. "But in a good way."
"Hey, thanks Sarge!" Caboose said. "I don't think I have ever heard you compliment anybody. I feel so special."
"That's because you ARE special." Sarge said with a smirk.
"Thanks Sarge!" Caboose said happily.
"That wasn't a compliment..." Sarge said jokingly, low enough so Caboose didn't hear but loud enough so Applejack did.
Applejack let out a small chuckle and a wry smile, but then caught herself and stopped. She then elbowed Sarge lightly in the chest shaking her head.
"You don't have to be mean." Applejack whispered to Sarge. "Caboose seems like a sweet kid. Not the smartest in the barrel o' apples, but sweet."
"Sorry. Old habits die hard." Sarge whispered back, then raised his voice back to normal. "Oh well, let's go then. I'm sure Grif has done something stupid by now."
"Thank you for the help Grif." Fluttershy said as she finished preparing a sandwich.
"Don't worry about it." Grif said, stomach growling.
Fluttershy giggled slightly and gave the sandwich to Grif, who then took a small bite out of it. "Oh my god, this is awesome." Grif said, grateful for the food. "What's in it?"
"Well, there is bread, jam, a little bit of honey, and some hay and oats."
Grif slowly looked down at the sandwich, feeling slightly weird. "Oh well, at least it tastes good." Grif said, taking another bite.
"I need to go feed the chickens and other outdoor creatures. Are you going to be alright here?"
Grif looked at her out of the corner of his eye. Fluttershy then smiled slightly and walked out the back door.
"Now she's getting it." Grif laughed, ready to take another bite out of his sandwich.
Then he heard a whining noise. He looked and saw a medium sized dog looking up at him, wagging its tail.
"What the hell do you want?" Grif asked the dog while he was chewing.
The dog just sat down and lifted its front paws, still wagging its tail.
"Go away you mutt. This is my sandwich." Grif muttered, making hoof motions trying to scare it away.
The dog paid no attention to the motions and started whining. Grif sighed and ripped off a piece of his sandwich and gave it to him. He then looked back at the sandwich, then back at the dog.
"How did you get me to do that?" Grif asked the dog.
"Woof!" The dog replied.
Fluttershy then walked back into the room and the dog turned its head to the side and stared at Grif. Grif shook his head and picked the sandwich back up. The dog then propped it's head on Grif’s legs. And he groaned.
"Oh I'm sorry. Is she bothering you?" Fluttershy asked. "She was supposed to be outside for feeding, but I guess she snuck inside. I'll put her back out and feed her."
"Don't worry about it." Grif said looking at the dog, tossing another piece of his sandwich to the dog. "I like dogs. This one seems pretty cool."
"Oh, well I'm glad you like it." Fluttershy said smiling.
"Does it belong to somebo- I mean somepony?" Grif asked.
Fluttershy made a small frown and shook her head.
"No." Fluttershy said sadly. "One day I was walking back from the market and I saw a skinny little puppy, all alone curled up in a ball with no collar on. I asked everypony in Ponyville, but nopony knows who owns this dog."
"I wonder why he was all alone?" Grif asked, eating the rest of the sandwich. "It seems like a nice dog to me."
"She wasn't a good dog when I found her. When I approached her, she started to growl at me." Fluttershy said. "When I finally got her to like me, I looked around and asked if anybody wanted to adopt her, but when they came to see her, she started acting very violently. I think you are the first one to meet her that she has not tried to bite by now."
"Are you telling me this dog hasn’t trusted anyone besides me?" Grif looked at the dog. The dog looked down at the ground, seemingly to avoid eye contact. "I like it. He reminds me of me, if what you told me was true."
"Oh that's... nice." Fluttershy said, and then coughed. "I was wondering if you would mind accompanying me to the market. I mean... if that’s alright with you..."
"Well, I WAS gunna go back to sleep." Grif said. "But I guess I owe you one. Sarge would have never let me sleep for that long, so yeah I'll come. You want to come to boy?"
The dog barked at him, seemingly annoyed. "She is actually a female dog." Fluttershy stated.
"Oh, well... what's her name then?"
"She didn't have her collar on her when I found her." Fluttershy explained. "And since I wasn’t planning on keeping her, I decided it would be best if I left it to the owner to decide once she found one."
"Oh. Well then I'll name her." Grif laughed, now looking at the dog. "I think I'm going to call you... Haley." As he finished speaking, she stood up and started wagging her tail.
"You're willing to adopt her?" Fluttershy squeed, then hugged Grif. "That's so wonderful. I'm ever so grateful. I was worried she wouldn't get a home because of her attitude."
"Don't mention it. Want to come to the market Haley?"
Haley barked and started to follow Grif. Fluttershy smiled and then walked out the door, followed by Grif who in turn was followed by Haley. On the short walk to the market, Grif enjoyed the energy that Haley bounded around him with. In a few minutes, they reached their destination.
"So what are you here for?" Grif asked.
"I need to pick up next week’s feed." Fluttershy said.
"Okay, who do we need to talk to to get it?"
"We need to go to one of the booths. It's just over there." Fluttershy said, walking towards a booth with a picture of a cat on it.
"Good afternoon Fluttershy. Back already?" The pony in the stand asked.
"Yes miss Pheed." Fluttershy said, nodding.
"Alright." Miss Pheed said, reaching under her stand and pulling up a big bag of animal feed. "That will be fourteen bits."
"Fourteen? But it was ten last week..." Fluttershy said.
"Sorry, but now it's fourteen." Miss Pheed said, maintaining a pleasant smile.
"Oh, alright I guess I can aff-"
"Hang on." Grif interrupted, stepping in front of Fluttershy. "What's with the huge price jump?"
"And who might you be?" Miss Pheed said, raising her nose.
"A friend. Now why don't you answer my question."
"I don't have to explain anything to you." Miss Pheed said with a sneer.
"Grif, it's okay I have the-" Fluttershy started again.
"Hang on Fluttershy." Grif asserted. "Now how about we bring it back down to ten before I make you bring it down."
"What are you going to do." Miss Pheed said, letting out a laugh.
Haley then started snarling and barking. Miss Pheed recognized the dog instantly, as she was the first pony to be asked by Fluttershy to look after it.
"Fine." She said in a trembling voice. "Ten bits it is."
"Glad to see we could come to an agreement." Grif said, smirking at her.
"You don't have to be so much of a pushover you know." Grif said. "You should try being a bit more... assertive."
"Oh no, I tried that before." Fluttershy said sadly. "I took a class but it turned me into a monster."
"I'm not saying turn into an asshole, I'm just saying say no once or twice..." Grif trailed off, "Say, is that Sarge?"
Sarge, Caboose, Pinkie, Applejack and Big Mac then appeared on the other side of the market.
"We're almost there." Applejack said.
"My legs are tired." Caboose said. "Stop it legs."
"Quit your groaning Caboose." Sarge grunted.
Just then, the stallion that had lost the bet at the eating contest stood in their way.
"Mind moving kid? We're trying to get somewhere." Sarge said.
"You owe me some bits." The stallion said.
"Oh? And who are you?" Sarge laughed.
"My name is not important to you old colt." The stallion said. "Now I suggest you pay your due or this could get really ugly really fast."
"I don't owe you anything, so I suggest you step out of the way." Sarge grunted, glaring at the stallion.
"You threw that competition and you know it." The stallion snarled. "Because of that I lost my money. So, as I said, pay now or I can't be held accountable for what I might do."
"It's not my fault you were an idiot. Besides, we didn't know anypony was actually betting on who would win."
"Yeah... well, you and those other hicks are going to pay me for my loss."
Sarge glared at the stallion and his left eye twitched. "Hey Big Mac? How about we show this kind, young stallion some good old-fashioned Apple family hospitality."
"Eeyup." Big Mac replied with a smile.
Big Mac then walked behind the stallion and hoisted him up, holding him so he couldn't move.
"Hey, what the-" The stallion said, struggling to break free.
"You can say what you want about me, but you made a serious mistake." Sarge said, turning around.
"P-Please... Please don't!" The stallion said. "I'm sorry, I'll leave you alone I swear!"
"That's not going to help you now." Sarge said with a smirk.
Sarge brought his legs back and kicked the stallion in the chest. The kick created a large flash and sent Big Mac and the stallion flying backwards. The force of the blow made a large noise, one that was very close to Sarges heart.
"Sarge that sounded like your shotgun-type thingy!" Caboose said.
"I know, I heard." Sarge laughed, smiling wickedly.
Sarge walked up to Big Mac and helped him up.
"Sorry about that big guy. I guess I don't know my own strength." Sarge said with a laugh.
"My chest! Oh Celestia, my chest!" The stallion moaned, rolling back and forth.
Sarge then turned his attention to the stallion who was on the ground, clutching his chest.
"You going to apologize for that remark son?"
"I'm sorry." The stallion said. "I'm so sorry sir."
"Not to me you idiot." Sarge said, backing up allowing him to see Big Mac and Applejack.
"I'm extremely sorry about calling you hicks. It won't happen again I swear." The stallion groaned, stumbling to get up.
"Glad to see everything is well." Sarge said, turning his gaze to the stallion. "Now get the hell out of my sight before you get Sarge'd again."
The stallion promptly stood up, still clutching his chest, which was now bright red, with one hoof. He looked at Sarge and then started speed walking away.
"Thanks for sticking up for us Sarge." Applejack said.
"Don't mention it. Nobody disrespects any reds. Except me." Sarge finished with a hearty laugh
"That was amazing!" Caboose then looked at Sarge’s side. "Hey Sarge you're getting one of those thingies."
"What are you talking about?" Sarge asked, looking at his flank. “Oh...”
A symbol was starting to appear on his flank. It took a couple seconds, but soon it was clear. It was a red shield, but with a pair of hooves kicking a pony in the chest embedded onto it. Sarge stared at his mark for several seconds and started to smile.
"My true talent is hurting others?" Sarge asked, still grinning. "I had a feeling it would be something amazing. Where's Grif when you need him?"
"Congratulations Sarge." Applejack said, extending her hoof which Sarge met.
"Hey Sarge! We should start calling you Buck Shot!" Caboose said excitedly.
Sarge glanced at Caboose, then back to his cutie mark.
"You know Caboose, that ain't half bad." Sarge said. "S-dog was getting a bit old, I think I'll retire that name."
"Sarge that was pretty fucking awesome." Grif said, walking up to Sarge.
"Grif? What the hell are you doing here? I didn't expect to see you ever again." Sarge said. "I expected you to be sleeping all day for the rest of your life."
"I was just giving Fluttershy a little help."
"I think this is the most work I've ever seen you do. Ever." Sarge said.
Grif shook his head, trying to get his head clear. "Woah, that was weird. Now I need to work on bringing my average back down." Grif yawned. "Hey Fluttershy, mind if I go back to your place to crash?"
"Well, we got the food so we were about to go back anyways." Fluttershy said.
"Great, time to catch some Z's" Grif said with a small laugh. Grif then looked at the tall red stallion. "Who's the big dude?"
"That's Big Mac." Sarge said.
Sarge then turned his side to Grif.
"Hey Grif, look what I got." Sarge said.
"Sarge, no offense but I really don't want to look at your ass." Grif said, shielding his eyes and looking away.
"Not my ass you moron, my mark thing." Sarge grunted.
"Oh, good job Sarge." Grif said, looking closely at it. "What did you get it for- GAHH!" Grif then found himself flying through the air with a heavy pain in his chest. "Ow my chest!" Grif moaned. "What the hell was that for?"
"You asked how I got it." Sarge said, letting out a hearty laugh. "So I showed you."
"Why am I not surprised your special talent is hurting people?" Grif asked, trying to stand up. "Come on Fluttershy, I need to sleep off this pain."
"Oh okay." Fluttershy said, trying to ease some of the burden off of Grif by putting his front leg around her neck.
Tucker’s eyes slowly opened as he let out a sore groan, back still hurting from the night before. He slowly sat up on Rainbow Dash’s bed and let out a yawn before he rubbing his eyes and looking around the room. Everything in the room was blue. There were a few posters on the wall, but it was barren of anything other than that. He got out of the bed and approached the large window perched in the middle of the wall and looked outside. The sun was just rising. Tucker’s mouth opened slightly as he witnessed sunlight bouncing off all the buildings that were set upon the clouds.
"Pretty cool view, isn't it?" Rainbow Dash asked, yawning lightly.
"Huh? Oh yeah it is pretty cool." Tucker said, turning to look at Rainbow Dash.
Rainbow Dash put her front legs above her head. "Did you have a good sleep?" Rainbow Dash asked, jumping out of the bed.
"Not really, had a tough time falling asleep." Tucker groaned. "How about you?"
"Well you kept tossing and turning so you pretty much kept me up all night."
"I get that a lot. I guess an apology is in order, isn't it?"
"If you want, but it won't help." Rainbow Dash said with a laugh.
"Good, I hate apologizing anyways." Tucker said, stomach growling. "Ugh, got any food?"
"You can go to the kitchen downstairs and make something. I'm going to go take a shower." Rainbow Dash said, about to walk into the adjacent room.
"Psh, please. Cooking is a woman’s job." Tucker said, then found himself knocked on the ground by a pillow.
"Don't be an ass." Rainbow Dash said, rolling her eyes.
"Alright." Tucker pouted, leaving the room.
Tucker then found his way to the kitchen. He looked around and noticed a couple cabinets, an oven and a fridge. He walked up to the fridge to see what was inside. There was a lot of produce lining the bottom shelf and the other shelf had some bottles of milk, a jar of jam and little much of anything else. Tucker wasn't too happy about eating any of that so he went to check the cabinets. The first cabinet had some hay and wheat, the second one had two loaves of bread.
"Where the hell does she keep the good stuff?" Tucker muttered.
Tucker then grabbed the bread and cut a couple slices out of it, he then grabbed the jam out of the fridge and spread it over one of the slices and slapped them together. He took a bite out of the sandwich and he smiled. He shoved the rest of the sandwich in his mouth and let out a happy burp. Now that he’d had something to eat, he stretched once more and went to find Rainbow Dash. When he got to the room, the sound of the shower had stopped. Tucker then opened the door to the bathroom and felt a searing pain shoot across his face and he was sent flying into the wall.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Rainbow Dash yelled furiously.
"I thought you were done showering so I was going to see what’s going to happen next." Tucker said, feeling his nose which was now bleeding. "I didn't expect "beat Tucker" to be on the agenda. Well actually, I was, just not like this."
Rainbow Dash made direct eye contact with Tucker and squinted at him, which made him shake nervously for a split second.
"What did you expect? I just got out of the shower!" Rainbow Dash yelled. "I didn't even dry off yet."
"What difference does it make? It's not like you wear any clothes anyways... you're pretty much naked all the time." Tucker said.
Rainbow Dash brought her hoof back, about to punch him in the throat. She put her hoof back on the ground and sighed, still glaring at Tucker.
"It's the principle of the matter." Rainbow Dash said, calming down. "How would you feel if I walked in on YOU in the shower?"
"Well, actually I-" Tucker started with a smile.
"If you want to die, finish that sentence." Rainbow Dash said.
Tucker stared at her for a couple seconds and shook his head.
"No, I think I'm good." Tucker stuttered.
Rainbow Dash turned and went into the bathroom and slammed the door extremely hard. Rainbow Dash felt her heart racing, not because of the anger, but because Tucker had walked in on her coming out of the shower. After a few minutes of Tucker sitting and rubbing his neck in silence, Rainbow Dash opened the door and looked at Tucker, who flinched at the sight of her.
"Don't worry, I'm not going to kill you. Not yet at least."
"Okay, cool. Good." Tucker said, getting up, starting to walk over to Rainbow Dash.
"I'm still mad at you though, so if you say one thing." Rainbow Dash started. "One. Thing. I will not hesitate to slam your head into the ground."
Tucker started to laugh, but then saw the seriousness in her eyes.
"Fine." Tucker said weakly, laugh dying in his throat. "So what are we going to do now?"
"Well, I didn't really plan for anything, but I guess I could show you around Cloudsdale." Rainbow Dash said, tapping her chin thoughtfully.
"My wings are still hurting though, and it doesn't help that my face feels like it was put through a shredder." Tucker whined.
"Well, I can't say that you didn't deserve it..." Rainbow Dash said, then let out a laugh. "Should we go see what the others are doing?"
"Sure thing."
Rainbow Dash and Tucker walked down the stairs and got to the door, Tucker opened it and took a step out, but was dragged back in by Rainbow Dash.
"What are you doing?" Tucker asked.
"I just thought that since your wings seem to be damaged, you wouldn't want to fall from this height." Rainbow Dash said.
Tucker walked up to the door and looked down.
"Oh shit. I completely forgot." Tucker said, a smile breaking out on his face. "Would you mind carrying me down?"
Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes but smiled in return. "Fine, but only this once. We're not going to be making a habit of me touching you."
"Damn." Tucker said, chuckling slightly.
Church laid awake in the guest room’s bed for hours after dawn. He slept for a couple hours, but he felt more awake than he ever has been in his entire life. He heard the door to Twilight’s room open and he smiled, getting out of the bed. He walked up to the door and opened it.
"Twilight." Church nodded at her.
"Hi, Church. You're up early. Did you have a good sleep?" Twilight asked.
"To be honest, I had a great sleep."
Twilight smiled at him and started making her way down the stairs with Church in tow.
"That's nice." Twilight said, walking towards the bookshelf.
"Listen, Twilight. I just wanted to say thank you."
"For what?" Twilight asked, clearly confused.
"For listening." Church replied simply.
"Oh, that was no big deal."
"It was for me." Church said, shaking his head slightly. "It was really gratifying to be able to get all that off of my chest."
"Everyone can listen though. I can't see why what I did was so great." Twilight asked.
"Everybody I have ever met claims to listen, but you were the first to actually HEAR what I had to say." Church said. "And it really helped me clear my head. I feel as if a great burden has been lifted off my shoulders."
"Well, that's good."
Church then walked up to her and hugged her. "Really. Thank you." Church said, smiling. "It's nice to have somebody that I feel I can actually trust, and not just some idiot."
Twilight let out a soft gasp as her cheeks turned a subtle shade of red. "Oh, you're welcome Church." Twilight said as she returned the hug.
Church let go of Twilight and let out a sigh. "So, what are we doing for the rest of the day?"
"Well, I need to reorganize my bookshelves by publishing date, then I plan on going to see Rarity. She wanted me to see her most recent work."
"Okay, I'll help." Church said.
Twilight smiled at him. "You really don't have to help, I mean, it's pretty boring work."
"Still. I need to do something around here." Church said, laughing. "I don't like just sitting around all the time. I've done too much of that in my life."
"Well, grab some books and start organizing.”
Church nodded and started to open the books to find the date of publication. Soon he found where they were and started to work. Church and Twilight worked in silence for hours, after all, what was there to talk about? Soon Twilight finished before Church and she helped him finish the other wall of books.
"Thank you for the help." Twilight said.
"No problem." Church said.
Spike then came down the stairs and looked around. "You organized the shelves by yourself?"
"No Spike, Church helped me."
Spike looked at Church, squinting his eyes. Spike then shrugged. "That's cool I guess."
"Now that that's all organized we're going to see Rarity. Want to come Spike?"
"You know it Twilight!" Spike said, hopping on Twilight’s back. Church smiled, seeing the signs of love in Spike’s demeanor.
In a few minutes, they found themselves in front of Carousel Boutique. Inside, Simmons was wearing the suit, frozen in place by Rarity’s spell.
"And... done." Rarity said, taking the suit off of Simmons. "I must say, this suit looks fantastic on you."
"Thanks. That spell worked wonders Rarity. I would have thought that standing for so long would hurt my legs." Simmons said. "And this time around, I didn't even feel nervous about the needle."
Rarity smiled at Simmons and started walking towards the door, bringing the two pieces downstairs to put on display.
"Simmons, I just want to apologize for how I treated you when we first met." Rarity said, frowning slightly. "I didn't know you would be such a help."
"That's okay, I'm used to that sort of treatment." Simmons said. "And while we're being honest, I wasn't too thrilled about meeting a new woman, because the last few I have met were nutjobs."
Rarity and Simmons both started laughing lightly as they made their way down the stairs.
"We're terrible." Simmons stated flatly.
"Yeah, we are." Rarity replied.
Rarity then placed both the suit and the dress on display.
"You're quite the gentlecolt you know that?" Rarity asked.
"Please, don't be too nice. Sarge would rip my head off if he saw me getting compliments." Simmons said, laughing.
"Well Sarge isn't here right now is he?" Rarity said.
Rarity then walked up to Simmons and gave him a kiss on the cheek. At that moment, the door swung open and Twilight, Spike and Church walked in.
"Hello Rarity." Twilight said. "We're not interrupting are we?"
"Rarity?" Spike said somberly.
Spike looked away from Rarity and started to glare at Simmons. Spike then jumped off of Twilight’s back and ran out the door.
"What's with the dragon?" Simmons asked.
"I don't know what came over him..." Twilight said.
"I think I know what did." Church said. "Come on Simmons, we need to go talk to him."
"Me? Why me?" Simmons asked.
"Just don't argue, okay?" Church demanded.
"Fine." Simmons said resignedly.
Simmons and Church both walked out the door to find Spike.
"So what is with the dragon?" Simmons asked.
"His name is Spike. He’s Twilight’s assistant." Church said, then looked at Simmons. "I think he likes Rarity."
"And?" Simmons said. "What made him storm off?"
"He saw her kiss you on the cheek. How do you think that made him feel dumbass?" Church said.
Simmons said nothing and just looked at the ground. Church looked around and saw Spike sitting on a fence. "There he is.”
Spike heard Church and looked up, angry tears in his eyes. He jumped off the fence and started walking away.
"We just want to talk." Church said, running after Spike.
"I don't want to talk." Spike yelled. "Do you have any idea what I'm feeling?"
Church caught up with Spike and put a hoof on his shoulder. "More than you will ever know." Church said sadly, which made Spike stop.
"I'm listening." Spike said, not looking at Church.
"I know you like Rarity." Church said quietly after a short silence. "Don't try to deny it."
"Was it that obvious?" Spike sighed, shoulders sagging.
"I just know what love looks like." Church said.
"Really? Have you had a crush on a girl for two years? Have you not able to tell said girl that you have loved for two years how you truly feel?" Spike asked, tears trickling down his face.
"Try nearly a decade."
"A decade?" Spike repeated quietly.
"Yeah. A decade." Church said. "Now tell me, how does Rarity treat you?"
"She treats me divinely." Spike said, heart beating faster. "When I'm around her I feel as if nothing else matters in the world."
"Then you have absolutely nothing to be sad about. Do you want to know how the girl I love treats me?"
Spike thought for a second and then nodded.
"She constantly tries to find ways to hurt me, she is always berating and insulting me, she treats me as if I am nothing. And you want to know what makes it worse? She knows that I still love her, even after all that, and it gives her that much more pleasure in my pain."
Spike looked down at the ground.
"The difference between you and me is that Rarity cares about you. Be it as a friend or something more, I do not know." Church said. "Now ask yourself. Do you really want to ruin what you have? Would you really hate Simmons, even if he makes Rarity happy?"
Spike looked at Church, smiling lightly. "No. That's all I want for her." Spike said, wiping the tears off of his face. "I just want her to be happy."
"And if you truly love someone, don't you think you should let them be with whomever makes them happy?"
"I guess so."
"Listen, Spike. I know you probably still hate me, and I understand that." Simmons said. "I just want you to know that that kiss didn't mean anything. Not to Rarity, and not to me. She was just thanking me for helping her around the boutique."
"Oh." Spike said. "I guess I made a rear end out of myself, huh?"
"Kind of." Simmons said, laughing slightly.
Church glared at Simmons. But then started to laugh, soon to be joined in by Spike.
"Sorry for acting that way." Spike said, no longer laughing. "It's just... back at Twilight’s place, when I came downstairs and saw you with her, I thought you were going to replace me as her assistant, and when I saw Rarity kiss Simmons, I thought I was being replaced there too."
"Don't worry about it." Church said. "Now lets say we go back?"
"Sure. Thanks for doing this."
"No problem. I guess we have more in common than we originally had thought."
"Yeah." Spike said quietly. "Simmons, do you mind not saying anything to Rarity?"
"You didn't even have to ask." Simmons said.
"You guys are alright."
"You're not a bad guy yourself, Spike." Church said.
Simmons, Church and Spike then made their way back to the boutique and opened the door.
"Spike!" Twilight yelled, running up to Spike to hug him. "I was so worried. Why did you storm out? Are you alright?"
"I'm alright now." Spike said, looking back at Church and Simmons. "Sorry about worrying you."
Spike then looked at Rarity and started smiling. She then looked him in the eyes and smiled back.
"So how did you like the pieces Twilight?" Simmons asked.
"I think they look fabulous." Twilight said. "It may even be her best work yet."
"Thank you Twilight." Rarity said. "Simmons helped me greatly while making these."
"That's great." Twilight said, smiling at Simmons.
"All I did was stand there." Simmons said, crimson deepening the red of his cheeks.
"You're too modest. Now I have two days until they come to pick it up, and I have no further orders coming in."
"That's good." Twilight said. "Should we go see what the others are up to?"
"Sounds good to me." Church said. "Where do you think they are?"
"Something tells me I know where Grif will be." Simmons said.
"Really?" Twilight asked. "And where would that be."
"Sleeping at Fluttershy’s place." Simmons laughed.
"Well, let's go then." Rarity said, walking towards the door.
They soon made their way out of the Carousel Boutique and started making their way towards Fluttershy’s cottage, where Fluttershy and Grif were just returning from the market.
"I wonder what came over me..." Grif muttered.
"Whatever do you mean?" Fluttershy asked.
"I worked harder today than I ever have in my entire life." Grif said. "It's going to take a whole lot of doing nothing to bring my average back down."
"Isn't working hard a good thing?" Fluttershy asked. Grif looked at Fluttershy and she started to laugh.
"Now you're getting it." Grif said, patting Fluttershy on the back. "The reason I don't do much is because then I start getting everybody to think that I work hard, and the more people think I work hard, the more things they try and tell me to do. By doing nothing, nobody asks me to do anything because they know I won't do it anyways."
"You're just a lazy colt, aren't you Grif?" Fluttershy asked, shaking her head.
"Damn straight, and I wouldn't have it any other way." Grif said with a smile.
Grif then jumped on the couch and Haley jumped onto it next to Grif’s legs. At that moment, the others arrived at the door and knocked. Fluttershy went and opened it.
"Oh, hello. What are you guys doing here?" Fluttershy asked.
"We came to see what you guys are up to." Twilight said.
"Oh, well me and Grif just got back from the market. He helped me with some animal food."
Simmons and Church looked at Grif.
"You're kidding, right?" Church asked.
"Yeah, you really expect us to believe that Grif has done something productive?" Simmons asked.
Fluttershy turned and looked at Grif, who gave her a small wink.
"Easy there Dash." Tucker said hastily as Rainbow Dash brought him close to the ground.
"Your wings better heal quick, because I don't like the idea of always having to carry you." Rainbow Dash muttered as she dropped him, watching as he barely managed to land on his hooves.
"I'm sure your opinion on that will change later." Tucker said, laughing.
"In your dreams." Rainbow Dash said. "C'mon, let's go try and find the others."
"You make me feel as if you don't want to be alone with me." Tucker said. "But I know you do. Nobody can resist Dr. Love for long."
"Have your balls healed yet?" Rainbow Dash asked, bending over and started putting on a fake, seductive demeanor.
"Yeah, they totally work now." Tucker said, excitedly walking up behind her.
"Good."
Rainbow Dash then kicked Tucker in the balls and started to walk away.
"Oh fuckberries." Tucker groaned. "My fuck berries!"
"I warned you not to say anything. Now let's go before you dig yourself into an even deeper hole."
"I-I don't think I can walk." Tucker said. "Can you carry me?"
"No." Rainbow Dash said, still walking.
"Ah well. You can't blame a guy from trying." Tucker said.
Tucker then stood up, holding his manhood and started limping after Rainbow Dash. It took them several minutes to get to the market, mostly due to the fact that Tucker kept falling to the ground moaning. But when they got there, they spotted Applejack among the crowd.
"Hey, there’s some of them now." Rainbow Dash said.
"Fantastic." Tucker moaned.
"Hey! There's Rainbow Dash." Pinkie exclaimed. "Rainbow Dash! We're over here."
"Hey Pinkie." Rainbow Dash said, walking up to them. "What are you guys doing?"
"What's wrong with Tucker?" Caboose asked.
Rainbow Dash turned and looked at Tucker, raising her eyebrow.
"I fell down some stairs." Tucker said quietly.
"I hate when that happens." Caboose said. "I was thinking about getting one of those magic chairs that move up and down the side of the steps."
"No, I think I've done enough falling for now." Tucker said.
"Glad to hear it." Rainbow Dash said.
Sarge looked at Tucker and started laughing. "What's so funny?" Tucker asked.
"You didn't fall down stairs, did you Tucker?" Sarge asked, still laughing.
Tucker didn't answer, he just glanced at Rainbow Dash, which made Sarge laugh even harder.
"I think I'm liking her already." Sarge said, wiping a tear out of his eye.
"Want to know what? Fuck you Sarge." Tucker grunted.
"I'm willing to bet that that was an ironic choice of words there blue." Sarge said with a smirk.
"Calm down you two." Applejack said, walking between Sarge and Tucker, expecting a fight.
"Don't worry, I'm calm." Sarge assured her. "And I'm willing to bet that Tucker doesn't have much fight left in him at the moment."
"You got that right." Tucker said.
"What are you two tal-" Applejack started to ask.
Sarge just smiled and motioned his head to Tucker. Applejack looked at Tucker, who was cradling his crotch. Then she looked at Rainbow Dash who was glaring at Tucker. Applejack started to laugh.
"Why are you laughing?" Pinkie Pie asked.
"You don't want to know." Sarge said.
"Come on y'all. Let's go find the others." Applejack said.
"Okay!" Caboose yelled.
"Let's go check on Grif, I need to make sure I didn't hurt him." Sarge said. "Too much."
"Alright, Fluttershy’s place it is." Pinkie Pie said, starting towards the cottage.
It took just a couple minutes to make it there. Tucker started to feel a little better along the way and stopped groping himself. Applejack knocked on the door and Fluttershy answered.
"Hello Applejack." Fluttershy said, letting her in. "Oh, you brought everyone else?"
Pinkie, Caboose, Sarge and Big Mac walked into the room
"Everyone else?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Well, Twilight and Rarity are here with Church and Simmons."
Sarge looked over at Grif, and Grif glared back at Sarge.
"Nice to see you too soldier." Sarge chirped happily. "Feeling better?"
"Not particularly." Grif muttered, then looked around. "This room is fucking crowded."
"He has a point." Rainbow Dash said. "How about the guys stay in here and we go outside for a little privacy, I need to talk to you girls anyways."
"Oh alright." Twilight said.
The ponies then left the room, leaving Big Mac and the other stallions in the room.
"Who is the big guy?" Church asked.
"This is Big Mac." Sarge said. "He works on the farm with Applejack."
"He is tall and red." Caboose said.
"Yes Caboose, we can see that." Church muttered.
Tucker stood there awkwardly, trying to get in a comfortable position. "What's wrong with Tucker?" Simmons asked.
"I don't want to talk about it." Tucker muttered.
"Rainbow Dash kicked him in the balls." Sarge said, barely containing his laughter.
The others looked over at Tucker, who then gave an ashamed nod. They all started laughing. All of them but Tucker.
"I hate you guys." Tucker said.
"What the fuck did you do to her?" Grif asked, now sitting up on the couch.
"I sort of... maybe... walked in on her in the shower." Tucker said.
"Was she naked?" Caboose asked.
"They're always naked you fucking idiot." Tucker responded.
"Oh my gosh you're right." Caboose gasped. "Hey Tucker! You said I would never see a girl naked!"
"Caboose. Be quiet." Church commanded.
"Okay."
"Why did you go in the room?" Simmons asked. "Because if you didn't know she was in there then that’s not that bad."
"I knew she was in there." Tucker said.
"You're a fucking pervert." Church said.
"No dude, I knew she was in there, but I had left the room when she started so when I came back to the room I didn't hear anything." Tucker said. "I thought she was done."
"So you thought that the best idea was to barge in?" Church asked.
"I don't know!" Tucker said. "I wasn't thinking, you have to believe me!"
"Don't worry Tucker, we know that you don’t think." Grif said, laughing.
"Thank you." Tucker said, then glared at Grif. "Screw you Grif."
Rainbow Dash led the girls far from Fluttershy’s home, stopping by a tree.
"Why did you bring us all the way out here Rainbow Dash?" Twilight asked.
"We could have just as well talked in a different room of Fluttershy’s home." Rarity said.
"I brought you here so the others wouldn't hear me." Rainbow Dash said.
"What's wrong?" Fluttershy asked.
Rainbow Dash looked at the ground and let out a sigh. "Tucker came into my bathroom when I was coming out of the shower." Rainbow Dash said, avoiding eye contact.
Each of the girls gave a slight gasp.
"Is that why he was holding his, er... area?" Rarity asked.
"Yes. Well no." Rainbow Dash said. "That wasn't until later."
"What happened then?" Fluttershy asked
"When he opened the door I instinctively kicked him in the face." Rainbow Dash said.
"And then what did you do next?" Twilight asked.
"Then I closed the door and dried up." Rainbow Dash said.
"That's it?" Applejack said. "Even I woulda done more than that."
"What is that supposed to mean?" Rainbow Dash asked bluntly.
"Well, you aren't exactly the most docile of ponies Dash." Rarity said.
Rainbow Dash was about to retort that statement, then she sighed and stared at the ground, contemplating what to say. After a couple minutes of silence one of them spoke up.
"You like him, don't you Dashie?" Pinkie asked.
"What?" Rainbow Dash said quickly. "No way!"
"It is okay to like him Rainbow Dash." Twilight said, smiling. "He seems like a fun stallion."
"I do not like him! He is arrogant and seems to think that everyone will like him if they meet, he can't take no for an answer, and he is just so... so..." Rainbow Dash said.
"So much like you?" Fluttershy asked.
"Yes. No. I mean he is pretty cute but-" Rainbow Dash started. But after she said that she brought her hooves to her mouth and her eyes opened wide and the girls stared at her.
"So ya think he's cute?" Applejack said, smiling.
"Please don't tell Tucker I said that." Rainbow Dash said quietly.
"Why? Are you ashamed?" Twilight asked.
"No, I'm not ashamed." Rainbow Dash said, letting out a sly smile. "I don't want you to tell him because he called it and I have a feeling I would never hear the end of it."
All of the girls started to laugh.
"Besides, I need to make sure that he likes me too before I say anything." Rainbow Dash said.
"That sounds... reasonable, I guess." Twilight said.
"Do you all promise not to tell Tucker?" Rainbow Dash asked.
All the girls replied with a quick nod.
"Thank you." Rainbow Dash said, now laughing. "Let's get back there and make sure they haven’t done too much damage."
The girls then made their way back to Fluttershy’s home and opened the door to find all the stallions, including Big Mac, on the floor laughing. All of them except for Tucker who was standing still, glaring at them, but with a smile.
"What's going on in here?" Applejack asked.
"If you guys say anything I will kill you all." Tucker muttered.
"Say anything about what?" Twilight said, smiling as she already knew the answer to the question.
Tucker noticed her expression and sighed, assuming that Rainbow Dash told the others.
"You're an undeniable bitch, you know that?" Tucker asked.
"You love it." Rainbow Dash said, smirking. Tucker smiled and shook his head.
"So Sarge, I see you got your cutie mark." Twilight noted.
"Yeah, but uh, can we call it something more manly?" Sarge said uncomfortably. "Cutie mark doesn't sound right to me. It reminds me too much of Donut."
"How about we just call it your mark." Applejack said.
"Speaking of that, what did you even do to get it?" Rarity asked.
"I kicked a stallion in the stomach." Sarge said smugly.
"Why am I not even surprised?" Church asked.
"Hey, he had it coming." Sarge grunted. "He disrespected Applejack and Big Mac. I wasn't about to go and let some weakling walk away after he insulted them."
"Some stallion? Do you mean Grif?" Simmons asked.
"No, I kicked Grif after when I saw him at the market." Sarge said.
Simmons and Church looked over at Grif.
"You actually went to the market?" Church asked.
"That's not important. You actually helped someone do something?" Simmons asked.
Grif just smiled lazily and shrugged.
"I would say that you are an asshat, but the opposite seems to be the case here." Church said.
"I prefer butthat." Caboose said.
"We know Caboose."
"If you guys don't mind, I kind of want to sleep." Grif said, rolling on his side. "I have been up for way too long."
"Now that he mentions it, it is getting rather late." Rarity said.
"I agree." Applejack said. "We need to wake up bright n' early to finish buckin' the last of the apple trees."
"I guess we'll be on our way then." Twilight said, walking towards the door. "Goodbye everypony."
All of the ponies then left Fluttershy’s home, each making their way back to their respective places of residence.
"You're not going to kick me in the nuts again, are you?" Tucker asked.
"Not unless you give me a reason to." Rainbow Dash said. "Do you think you can fly now?"
Tucker looked back at his wings and started flapping them slowly.
"They seem to be good now." Tucker said.
"Good." Rainbow Dash said, hitting Tucker on his flank. "You're it."
Tucker stared at her zoom away for several seconds, until he processed what just happened.
"No fair!" Tucker yelled. "I wasn't ready."
"That's too bad." Rainbow Dash yelled back. "I was under the impression that you were a stallion, not a mouse."
"I'll show you who is a mouse." Tucker said, snapping forward after Rainbow Dash.
Tucker then caught up with Rainbow Dash and hit her flank.
"Who is the mouse now?" Tucker yelled.
Tucker looked back at Rainbow Dash who was about to touch him then he stopped. Rainbow Dash tackled him to the ground.
"Why did you stop?" Rainbow Dash asked.
Tucker did not say anything, instead he kissed her on the lips.
Rainbow Dash and Tucker laid on the ground for a couple seconds in their embrace, but then Rainbow Dash pulled back her head and looked at him, squinting.
"A little forward, aren't you Tucker?" Rainbow Dash asked, raising her eyebrow but keeping her smile.
"Yeah, you already decimated my dick so I figured I didn't have much more to lose." Tucker replied, laughing slightly. "What are we going to do now?"
They both then sat up and looked at the stars.
"It really is a nice night." Rainbow Dash said. "Be a shame to sleep it away." Tucker looked at her and started grinning. "That's not what I meant." Rainbow Dash laughed. "I mean do you want me to show you around Cloudsdale? Your wings seem to be working now so I can show you the cool sights."
"Sure, sounds good." Tucker said, getting off the ground.
"I think I know a place that you will like." Rainbow Dash said, flying towards Cloudsdale.
"All right lead the way." Tucker said, flying after her.
Rainbow Dash led Tucker all the way to Cloudsdale and stopped by a large, circular building.
"What is this thing?" Tucker asked.
"This is where pegasi learn how to fly, and they also do aerial shows every so often." Rainbow Dash said, gazing at it wistfully. "And it is also where the Wonderbolts perform."
"Who are the Wonderbolts?" Tucker asked.
"They're the best flyers in all Cloudsd- no, all of Equestria." Rainbow Dash said. "It has been my dream to join them one day."
"Cool. Is that them?" Tucker asked, pointing to a poster.
Rainbow Dash trotted to the poster and started looking it over. Once she got to the bottom her eyes opened wide and she started smiling.
"Ohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh!" Rainbow Dash said excitedly.
"What?" Tucker asked.
"The Wonderbolts are performing in the next few days! We totally need to go see it." Rainbow Dash squealed.
"I don't have any money to pay for a ticket, do you?" Tucker asked.
Rainbow Dash looked at Tucker and frowned slightly. "I don't think so." Rainbow Dash said sadly.
"Well," Tucker said, looking at the poster. "We have almost a week to get some cash."
"Yeah, that's true." Rainbow Dash said, tapping her chin. "It doesn't cost too much, so we might be able manage it."
"Cool." Tucker said, grinning. "They sound awesome."
"They are." Rainbow Dash said, now flying back home. "We'll figure out how to get some work tomorrow, but for now I'm feeling tired."
Back down in Ponyville, the others arrived at their residences and went to sleep for the rest of the night. All except Church, who sat outside the Twilights place gazing at the stars. Twilight was asleep, but Spike found himself restless so he decided to go downstairs and grab a bite to eat. When he got to the bottom he noticed the door was ajar and that Church was sitting on the grass.
"What are you thinking about Church?" Spike asked, stepping outside, forgetting about food.
"Everything that's been happening." Church said.
"What do you mean by that?" Spike asked.
"I'm not sure. Everything just seems to be moving way too fast." Church said. "Like how we're all adapting to this situation. And how we seem to fitting in too well with everything. Look at Caboose and Pinkie for example, they have the exact same personality. And look at Tucker, he managed to learn in one night. It unnerves me."
"Maybe it was a hidden talent." Spike suggested.
"The only talent Tucker has is one for trouble." Church chuckled.
"Sounds like you are just making excuses." Spike said.
"Excuses for what?"
"Maybe you're starting to like it here, and you're just trying to find a reason not to."
Church looked at the stars and smiled.
"I am starting to like it here, why would I look for a reason to not like it?" Church asked.
"Maybe you guys just didn't fit in from where you came from and you are simply not used fitting in now." Spike said. "Maybe you're looking for a reason to go back."
"Maybe you're right." Church said, and he yawned. "I think I'm going to go to bed."
"Alright, I'm going to grab something to eat." Spike said. "Night Church."
"Night Spike." Church said, walking up the stairs to the spare room.
Church crawled into his bed and promptly fell into a deep sleep. The next morning Sarge was awoken early by Applejack over at Sweet Apple Acres.
"Rise'n shine Sarge." Applejack said, tapping on Sarge’s shoulder. "If we hurry we can finish buckin' all the apples today."
"Sounds good." Sarge said, yawning heavily and stretching.
Applejack smiled and left the barn, Sarge got up and followed soon after. By the time he’d gotten outside, Big Mac had already started to work. Instead of exchanging pleasantries, the group just went straight to work. It took them just a couple hours to finish off what was left of the apple trees.
"Listen Sarge." Applejack said, wiping sweat off of her brow. "I know I've said it before, but I'll say it again. I really appreciate you helpin' us out. We made you a little thank you gift, it's inside the house."
"You shouldn't have." Sarge said. "Is it a shotgun?"
"What in tarnation is a shotgun?" Applejack asked.
"The most beautiful discovery since hurting Grif." Sarge said, pretending to wipe a tear from his eye.
"No it isn't a shotgun." Applejack said, laughing slightly. "It is something much better than that."
"Better than a shotgun?" Sarge said. "I find that hard to believe."
"Come on, it'll be easier if we just show ya what it is." Applejack said, opening the door to the home.
"Better than a shotgun." Sarge muttered. "That'll be the day."
Applejack made her way to a table where Granny Smith and Applebloom were sitting. There was a small box that sat on the table and Applejack grabbed it. She then walked up to Sarge and held it up to him.
"We know it isn't much, but we still hope ya like it." Applejack said, rubbing the back of her neck.
Sarge grabbed the box and opened it slowly and saw a dark brown stetson hat.
"You got me a hat?" Sarge asked.
"We dun’ have much so it was hard t' find a proper way to repay ya." Applejack said. "We just wanted t' tell ya that we really do appreciate ya bein’ here Sarge. And we consider ya to be apart of the apple family now."
Sarge gazed at the hat and grabbed it. He put it on and looked back at Applejack.
"D'ya like it?" Applejack asked.
"Yeah. Yeah I do." Sarge said happily.
Rarity woke up early to her doorbell ringing. She made her way down the stairs and slowly opened the door to find a grey pegasus holding brown bag.
"Morning, Rarity." Derpy said.
"Good morning, Derpy." Rarity yawned.
"I have some mail for you!" Derpy said.
Rarity smiled as the clumsy pegasus reached in her bag and pulled out a pile of letters and envelopes. Derpy handed all of them to Rarity and smiled.
"Have a good day Rarity!" Derpy said, slowly walking backwards.
"You too Derpy." Rarity said, smiling back.
Rarity then closed the door and started looking through all the mail, the majority of it belonging to somepony else. She sighed as she knows she will have to find who they belong to. Simmons then got up and yawned.
"Who was that?" Simmons asked.
"That was the mailmare. Apparently I have mail." Rarity said.
Simmons raised his eyes and saw Rarity holding nearly one hundred envelopes. "I would have never guessed." Simmons said.
"They're not all mine." Rarity said, putting them on a table. "In fact, there is a chance none of them belong to me."
"What a reliable mail service this place has." Simmons said sarcastically.
"Well, Derpy may not be the most reliable pony, but her heart is in the right place." Rarity said.
"Her name is Derpy?" Simmons laughed. "You're kidding right?"
"No, why?" Rarity said curiously.
"Well it's just that back where me and the others are from, Derpy is a..." Simmons started but then cleared his throat. "Nevermind, it doesn't matter. Need any help?"
"It would be much appreciated." Rarity said, pushing half the mail over to Simmons.
Simmons started shuffling through all the letters, all of which belonged to somepony else. He kept going and once he got to the last letter he stalled.
"Who is Fancypants?" Simmons asked.
"Fancypants is only the most important pony in Canterlot." Rarity gasped, snatching the letter away from Simmons. "Let me see that."
Rarity opened it and scanned it quickly, then looked up at Simmons with a huge grin plastered on her face.
"This is amazing news!" Rarity said.
"What is?" Simmons asked.
"Fancypants is sending over one of his friends to get a suit made in a few days." Rarity said. "Apparently he has a rather unique build, so I have to fit him. He said he remembers my work from a party I attended while back and figured I would be the best candidate for making him a fantastic suit."
"That's pretty cool, I guess." Simmons said.
"Do you think you could help me?" Rarity asked.
"How could I help?" Simmons said. "I'm not exactly the best choice of partners for making clothes."
"Well, I know of another way you could help." Rarity said.
"And what would that be?" Simmons asked, raising his brow.
"I could show you how to use the spell that would hold him in place while I get his measurements." Rarity said.
"Do you think I could really learn how to do it?" Simmons said. "I don't know how to use magic."
"You and I both know that is not true. Remember how you broke my spell when you saw that I was getting overworked?" Rarity asked. "I was surprised that you managed to do so and it shows that you have an aptitude for magic."
"Hey, yeah." Simmons said happily. "Okay, sure. Show me how to do it."
"Let's go upstairs." Rarity said, standing up. "You will need complete concentration and we don't want you to get interrupted."
Simmons nodded and followed Rarity up to her room.
"Okay." Rarity said, standing straight up. "To begin, you must clear your mind of everything."
"But I know so much." Simmons said, semi-sarcastically. Rarity looked at him and smiled sweetly. "Okay, clear my mind. What comes next?" Simmons asked.
"Now imagine yourself grabbing me and holding me down." Rarity said.
Simmons raised his brow for a second but shook it off and started concentrating. "Uh, alright." Simmons said. "Then what?"
"The next step is to use that mental image and, I guess, project it through your horn." Rarity said. "It is kind of hard to explain since it is an ability unicorns are born with. Here let me..."
Rarity tried to take a step towards Simmons but found herself unable to move. She then looked at Simmons and started to smile. Simmons shook his head, breaking concentration.
"Holy shit. It worked." Simmons said, a shocked expression spreading across his face. "I did it."
"You're a fast learner."
"You're a great teacher."
"You're far too kind." Rarity giggled. "Are you feeling hungry?"
"Sort of." Simmons said.
"How about we make our way to a cafe and grab something to eat." Rarity said. "My treat."
"Sounds good to me." Simmons said with a smile.
Rarity and Simmons made their way out the boutique and soon found themselves in front of a cafe. Rarity told the server to get a table for two and he led them to a small table inside. The server gave them menus and made his way to the kitchen. Simmons looked at the menu with an inquisitive eye.
"Not much of a selection..." Simmons said. "Just a couple sandwiches and the like."
"Yes, but what they lack in quantity they make up for in quality." Rarity said.
The server made his way back to their table with two glasses of water and stood at attention.
"What can I get you folks?" The server asked cheerfully.
"I will just have a daisy sandwich." Rarity said, handing the menu over to the server.
"I'll have one as well." Simmons said, doing the same.
The server nodded and trotted over to the kitchen and swiftly brought out two sandwiches and brought them over to their table. Simmons thanked him and took a bite out of it.
"You were right, this is delicious." Simmons said.
"I know I was right." Rarity said, winking playfully at Simmons. "So, tell me more about yourself."
"I'm not that interesting." Simmons said without a hint of humor.
"Even so, I would like to get to know you more." Rarity said.
"Alright then." Simmons said, quickly finishing off the sandwich.
He spent the next hour telling Rarity about himself, and after he was finished Rarity did the same. After they finished, Rarity paid the bill and the pair walked out of the restaurant, both clearly enjoying themselves.
Grif was awakened by Fluttershy, who was tapping on his shoulder lightly. He grunted and rolled off the couch slowly. Haley jumped down after him and they both stretched. After a couple seconds of Fluttershy staring awkwardly at Grif, he spoke up. "Uh, any reason you woke me up so early?"
"It's not early. It's one in the afternoon..." Fluttershy said quietly.
"What?" Grif said with a chuckle. "That's earlier than I thought it was."
Fluttershy looked at Grif and smiled and he let out a small sigh. "Alright, I'll bite." Grif grunted. "What's up?"
"Pinkie Pie wanted me to stop by her place." Fluttershy said. "So I was wondering if you would be able to, you know, look after some bunnies..."
Grif stared at her silently.
"Is it a lot of work?" Grif asked simply.
"Oh, it's none at all." Fluttershy said happily. "You just have to sit under a tree and make sure they don't run off."
"I guess I could do that." Grif said.
Fluttershy walked out the door to her yard and Grif followed her obediently. He looked out at the half dozen bunnies, running around and playing. He then saw two trees side by side and he sat down with his back on one of them.
"There really aren’t that many of them so they shouldn't give you any trouble at all." Fluttershy said.
"So there really is nothing else to it?" Grif asked after sitting for a couple seconds
"As long as you keep your eye on them, then it’s the easiest thing in the world." Fluttershy said.
"Okay, cool."
Fluttershy gave Grif a quick hug.
"Thank you." Fluttershy said, turning away. "I'll be back soon."
"No problem." Grif said, letting out a slight yawn.
As Fluttershy left the area, Grif gazed lazily at the six bunnies as Haley curled up next to him. He watched them for a couple minutes before his eyes felt heavy. He let them shut, intending to rest his eyes for a couple minutes, but when he opened them he felt a lot more awake. He looked at the sun, which was further down than he remembered. His eyes then snapped open and looked around.
"Fuck." Grif yelled. "Where the hell did they go?"
Grif jumped up and ran around the yard until he saw a couple of bunnies sleeping behind the tree where he was sleeping. Grif let out a wry smile and went to check on the animals. He sighed as he had counted that all five of the bunnies were there. Then he realized that there used to be six.
"I have to go find it, don't I?" Grif asked Haley.
Haley started wagging her tail and barked.
"Hey, you're a dog right? Think you could sniff it out?" Grif asked.
Haley barked and started to sniff the air. She then started walking away from the house. Grif groaned gathered the bunnies into Fluttershy’s home so they would not run away as well. When they were all inside he made his way to Haley, who was sniffing the ground and slowly walking ahead.
"I'm starting to really hate this place." Grif muttered.
Haley’s ears then perked up and she started to run. Grif started to run with her and they soon found their way at an entrance to a large forest.
"You mean it went in there?" Grif asked. "Fuck that shit."
Grif turned around and started to make his way back to his spot. He then stopped and sighed, assuming Fluttershy would be devastated if one of them was gone.
"Son of a bitch. At least I can hope that it didn't go too far." Grif muttered. "But I just know that the world hates me too much to let that be the case."
Grif walked forward with Haley, who was still on the bunny’s trail. Grif then saw something jump into a bush that was in front of him. He smiled and started to walk over to it, but fell flat on his chest as a searing pain shot across his back.
"Fuck, my back." Grif groaned.
Grif got up and looked around. He couldn't see anything but had a feeling something was watching him. He slowly made his way over so he could look in the bush. There was a snap behind him and he spun around quickly. He focused on the spot where he had heard the sound come from. It was hard to make out what it was, but his eyes quickly adjusted and he noticed that it was a wolf. But there was something off about it. It then walked into a spot of sunlight and Grif was able to identify what made it look unnatural.
"Why the fuck is that thing made out of wood?" Grif said shakily to himself.
The bunny then jumped out and started hopping away. The wolf then lost all focus of Grif and started to chase after it. Haley then barked and started to run after the wolf, tail wagging. Grif grudgingly chased after Haley.
"Why the fuck am I doing this?" Grif muttered, not turning back.
Grif made his way through the trees and soon found Haley standing next to a tree, head lowered. He walked up next to her and looked at where she was looking. The bunnies foot was stuck in the ground and it was surrounded by a some wolves. Grif looked at the ground.
"So either I turn back and go to sleep, or I go in and probably die." Grif thought to himself. "Decisions, decisions."
One of the wolves then took a step towards the bunny, but soon found itself launched to the ground by Grif.
"This was a bad idea." Grif said to himself.
Grif ran to the bunny and took it out of the ground and tossed it over the wolves into a bush. Instead of giving chase again, the wolves looked over at Grif, hunger in their eyes. The largest wolf then howled and started to close in on Grif.
"This was a horrible fucking idea." Grif yelled.
Fluttershy walked up to Sugarcube Corner and rang the doorbell. She stood silently for several seconds until Caboose opened the door to greet her.
"Oh. Hello Caboose." Fluttershy said.
"Hello." Caboose chirped happily.
"Is Pinkie here?" Fluttershy asked sweetly.
"Yes." Caboose replied simply.
Caboose then closed the door. Fluttershy stared at the door for a couple seconds before she realized her mistake and rang the doorbell again.
"Hello again!" Caboose said happily.
"Hi. Pinkie told me to stop by, can you go tell her I'm here?" Fluttershy asked.
"Okay." Caboose said.
Fluttershy then walked into the bakery and Caboose sprinted off to the kitchen and told Pinkie that Fluttershy was here.
"Fluttershy! Isn't this a surprise?" Pinkie said, walking out of the kitchen.
"You asked me to come..." Fluttershy said quietly.
"Oh yeah." Pinkie said, placing her hoof on her face. "Silly me. Follow me upstairs, I need your help with the babies."
Cabooses ears perked up and his pupils slowly started to dilate.
"Caboose, do you want to come meet the babies?" Pinkie asked.
Caboose stared at her and his eyes were nearly completely black.
"No." Caboose said, voice deep and raspy. "I am quite fine here, thank you."
Fluttershy stared at Caboose and felt a wave of unease pass through her and she shuddered. Pinkie eyed Caboose curiously.
"Okay then..." Pinkie said slowly, making her way to the stairs.
"What happened to Caboose?" Fluttershy asked, voice shaking. "He seemed... strange back there."
"Oh, don't worry about him. He's just playing a game." Pinkie said happily, then tightened her smile. "I think."
Fluttershy looked down the stairs at Caboose who was staring out the window, his fur seemingly darkening.
"Are you alright?" Fluttershy asked.
Caboose then shook his head and his eyes and fur went back to normal.
"No, I'm Caboose." Caboose said with a smile, voice back to normal pitch.
Fluttershy smiled at Caboose, then made her way to the room where Pound Cake and Pumpkin Cake were asleep.
"What do you need my help with?" Fluttershy asked, smiling at the sleeping foals. "They seem to be okay to me."
"Oh, I know." Pinkie said. "It's just that their first birthday is coming up soon, so I wanted you to help me plan the party."
"I would be happy to help." Fluttershy said. "What do you need me to do?"
"I want you to bring some animals so there could be a small petting zoo for them to play in." Pinkie said.
"That sounds nice." Fluttershy said with a smile. "I'll try my best."
"That's all I could hope for." Pinkie said.
The two girls then made their way down the stairs and the door suddenly swung open. Angel had somehow opened the door, sweating profusely.
"Angel, what's wrong?" Fluttershy gasped. "Where is Grif?"
Angel shook his head and started out the door, not turning back. Fluttershy’s instincts told her to not ask questions, immediately starting to follow Angel. Pinkie then shuddered violently.
"There’s a doozy a-coming." Pinkie said, running out the door.
"How do you know?" Caboose asked, galloping after Pinkie.
"My Pinkie sense told me so." Pinkie said.
Angel stopped at the entrance to the Everfree forest and started pointing inside. Fluttershy stared worriedly inside. "He went in there? Doesn't he know dangerous it is in there?"
Pinkie and Caboose then caught up to Fluttershy, noting the extremely worried expression on her face. "What's wrong?" Pinkie asked.
"Grif went into the Everfree forest." Fluttershy replied.
"We need to get the others." Pinkie gasped. "Caboose, you go get Twilight and Church. I'll go get Applejack and Rarity. Fluttershy, you go find Rainbow Dash. Meet back here as soon as you find them."
Fluttershy nodded and started flying towards where Rainbow Dash lives. Pinkie Pie started to run towards Sweet Apple Acres. Caboose looked at the forest and then ran off in a random direction, thinking he was going to the library.
"Let go you fucker." Grif yelled, kicking off a timberwolf that was biting on his leg. "Screw it, I'm just going to run."
And with that, Grif lunged forward to escape the predators. He glanced around at the trees, no discernible path, he kept running in a straight line. He knew that the timberwolves were going to catch up to him and it was only a matter of time. Then he remembered something. "I have wings. Why am I running?"
Grif then focused on his wings and flapped once, shooting through the tree branches into the air and making cuts on his body. Another flap of his wings and he soared above the tree line.
"Woah. This is awesome!" Grif exclaimed. "I'll never have to walk again."
He then straightened his wings and stared straight down.
"Now how the hell do I go back down..." Grif muttered. Grif retracted his wings and started to spiral towards the ground. "Not my best day." Grif grunted before slamming his face on the ground.
Grif tried to stand up but fell over in a daze. He looked at his body and saw that his wings had bite marks on them, and there was the occasional chunk missing from his back legs.
"They got me more than I thought." Grif said, laughing weakly. "Ow, my body."
He then heard another branch snap and glanced to where the noise was coming from. There was a pony in a robe standing still, watching from a distance. Grif sighed and collapsed on the ground from blood loss. Back at the entrance to the forest, all the ponies were gathered, all staring nervously at the forest.
"Why did he run in there?" Applejack asked. "Doesn't he know how dangerous it is in there?"
"Grif doesn't know anything." Sarge grunted. "Let's go."
"You really care about Grif, don't you Sarge?" Twilight asked.
"As lazy as that son of a bitch is, he is still one of my men. Besides, Grif and I both know that I am going to be the one that will be the death of him."
"We should hurry, it looks like the sun will be setting soon." Simmons remarked.
The group nodded in agreement and started to make their way into the forest to find Grif.
The group was slowly following hoof tracks, presumably made by Grif. As they got deeper into the forest, more and more prints started to appear.
"Are those..." Rarity said quietly.
"I think so." Twilight confirmed. "Timberwolves."
"What the fuck is a timberwolf?" Tucker asked.
"Timberwolves are a subspecies of the canine family. They have the appearance of a wolf, but they are made out of wood. They are generally bigger than other wolves and their barkish hide makes them more impervious to damage."
"Suddenly I don't feel like being in here." Simmons said.
A low growl was heard coming from their left. Their eyes snapped to the darkness where there was a pair of yellow eyes watching them.
"Stay close to each other." Twilight gulped. "They won't attack us if our group is larger than theirs."
The animal then barked and jumped out of the bushes. It was not a timberwolf, but rather a friendlier canine.
"Haley." Fluttershy squeaked. "What happened?"
Haley barked and started to follow the hoof tracks and the group followed quickly. Haley slowed down and whined.
"What's wrong girl?" Fluttershy asked.
Haley looked at Fluttershy sadly, then back at the ground. There were tufts of orange-yellow fur, and specks of blood flecked across the ground. The girls gasped but the guys just stared at the scene indifferently.
"Quit your worrying." Sarge said, laughing weakly. "Grif is a resilient bastard. There's no way he could die by a couple of wild dogs."
The girls regained some of their confidence and nodded in unison. The group then followed the tracks until they suddenly disappeared. Sarge stared at the tracks for several seconds then looked up.
"Oh no." Rarity gasped.
Sarge said nothing but pointed up in the trees, where there was a gaping hole and tree branches splintered everywhere.
"Did he ever try to fly before?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"When he was with me he seemed content to be on the ground." Fluttershy noted.
"As much as it pains me to say, Grif is a fast learner when it suits him." Sarge grunted. "Come on, we're burning daylight."
"We don't know where he went though." Twilight said. "How are we supposed to-"
A cough was heard from beside them, and they quickly turned to see a zebra in a robe staring at the group. Before any of the guys could react, Twilight spoke. "Zecora! We need your help, our friend came in to the-"
"You need not tell me of information I already know. I am keeping him safe. Let us go."
Twilight nodded and the group followed her lead and went with Zecora. It only took them a minute to get to Zecora’s hut, where she opened the door and motioned them inside.
"Where is Grif?" Simmons asked.
"He is asleep on my bed, though he is hard of breath." Zecora said somberly. "It is hard to tell now, but this may end in either life... or death."
The mares gasped, but once again the stallions stared indifferently. They found themselves uneasy about how well the guys were taking the news while Zecora left the room to check on Grif.
"Does she always speak in rhymes?" Tucker asked quietly.
"Yes." Twilight replied.
"That won't get annoying." Tucker muttered sarcastically.
Zecora then came back out of the room with a smile on her face.
"How is he doc?" Caboose asked.
"Your friend is perfectly alright, though I advise you to stay out." Zecora said. "It will be only a matter of time until he can run and shout."
"Let me go see him." Sarge laughed, walking towards the door. "I'll show you that he is perfectly okay, he is just being lazy as usual."
"No, the young stallion needs his rest." Zecora said. "All we can do now is hope for the best."
"Listen Zecoran." Sarge started.
"Zecora." Twilight corrected.
"Listen Zecora." Sarge grunted. "You don't know Grif. That bastard has survived far more than any man could hope to endure. I've shot him, he's exploded, he has fallen off of a damn cliff and he is still kicking. I'm sure he's fine."
"Even so, we must let his fresh wounds mend." Zecora said. "The pain of a timberwolf bite will be hard for your yellow friend."
As she said that the door to the room swung open slowly.
"How many times do I have to say it." Grif said weakly. "I'm fucking orange."
Sarge laughed cruelly at the sight of Grif.
"Good to see you too Sarge." Grif muttered, coughing up a little blood.
The others stared at his body, looking at all of the scars and pieces missing out of him.
"How are you standing?" Twilight gasped.
"Sarge has put me through far worse than this." Grif said with a weak laugh. "It will take a lot more than a few wild dogs to keep me down."
"Told you so." Sarge said smugly. "Grif is pretty tough."
Sarge punched Grif in the gut and he fell to the ground.
"Fuck, my kidney." Grif grunted.
"Man up." Sarge said, smiling wickedly.
Grif laughed and gritted his teeth through the pain.
"Go fuck yourself Sarge." Grif said with a grating laugh.
"You two are horrible." Rarity said. "How can you two even call yourself friends?"
Grif and Sarge stared at Rarity. Then they glanced at each other and burst out laughing.
"Good one Rarity." Grif said, wiping a tear from his eye.
"Well, will you look at that." Church said.
"What?" Grif asked.
"You got your mark." Church said, trying to hide a laugh.
"Really? Cool, what is it?" Grif asked.
Sarge burst out with laughter.
"That just made my life." Sarge said, rolling helplessly on the ground. "I should have guessed it would be something like that."
"Why do I have a bad feeling about this..." Grif muttered, turning his head to look at his cutie mark and groaned. "Really? That is my "special skill"? This fucking sucks."
"I say it fits you perfectly." Sarge said smugly.
"What is it?" Twilight asked.
"I guess you could say it shows how resilient he is." Simmons noted.
"Back where we're from, that symbol is something we put on crash test dummies." Sarge said with a large grin.
Grif left the building and sat outside as the other guys were making fun of him, Fluttershy following close behind him. There was a clear view of the sunset and Grif felt oddly at ease. Fluttershy sat with him, staying silent as they both watched the sun set.
"It’s so beautiful." Fluttershy said.
"Yeah, I never really took the time to watch the sun go down from where I'm from." Grif said. "Now that I think about it, I don't even remember the sun moving. It really makes you feel at peace."
Fluttershy raised her brow then frowned as she looked at Grif’s tattered appearance.
"Does it hurt?" Fluttershy asked quietly.
"It fucking kills." Grif said with a laugh, then he shrugged. "But I've lived through worse."
"How do you do it?" Fluttershy asked.
"How do I do what?" Grif asked in return.
"Everything." Fluttershy said. "You look like you should be in the hospital, but here you are outside, watching the sun set. Maybe we should get you checked at the hospital."
"Stop worrying about me." Grif said. "I'll be perfectly fine, I just really need some sleep. My body may appear to say otherwise, but I am perfectly fine."
Fluttershy nodded then hugged Grif tightly. Grif stared at Fluttershy with a confused expression.
"Uh, what was that for?" Grif asked.
"For going out of your way to save Angel." Fluttershy said.
"Don't mention it." Grif said, blushing slightly.
"I really do appreciate it though. I mean, look at you. You seem to be in a lot of pain and I feel like you are trying to hide what you are feeling."
"The only thing I felt was guilt." Grif admitted with a weak laugh. "I fell asleep while watching the animals. If I had stayed awake then none of this would have-"
Fluttershy leaned in and kissed him on the cheek. Grif was taken aback and flinched. Fluttershy pulled her head back and she blushed deeply.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to do tha-" Fluttershy gasped.
"Don't worry about it." Grif coughed awkwardly. "We've all had a long day. Let's go tell the others we're ready to go."
"Okay." Fluttershy said, her cheeks deepening in color.
Grif then got up and limped to the door. Fluttershy got up and took some of his burden by placing his foreleg around her neck. Grif let out a brief smile, then shook it off and opened the door.
"Alright, you guys ready to get moving?" Grif asked.
All of them nodded and made their way out the door. Once all the others left, Grif looked at Zecora.
"Listen, uh, Zecora. I just wanted to say thank you."
Zecora looked at Grif and nodded before she walked in to the next room. Grif then went outside with the others and they made their way back the way they came. Grif limped at a steady pace thanks to Fluttershy and Tucker carrying him along. The group saw that they were being watched by the timberwolves and Grif couldn't help but feel that they were watching him specifically.
"Pick up the pace Grif." Sarge grunted. "We're almost there and I don't like the way they're watching us."
"Yeah, because being watched by them is so much worse than being attacked by them." Grif grunted, trying to speed up.
They finally got out of the forest and they said their goodbyes, leaving Fluttershy and Grif alone.
"I can't wait to get some more sleep..." Grif groaned quietly.
Fluttershy smiled and slowly aided Grif to her house with Haley by his side. She opened the door and Grif took his leg away from her and started to limp to the couch. Fluttershy walked slightly faster and blocked him.
"You go sleep in my bed... if you want to, that is." Fluttershy said quietly. "I'll sleep on the couch."
"Are you sure?" Grif asked hesitantly.
"Yes, you need a good night’s rest." Fluttershy said.
"Okay, sweet." Grif said, walking into her bedroom. "Thanks. G'night Fluttershy."
"Good night Grif." Fluttershy said happily.
Grif looked back at Fluttershy who was climbing on the couch, trying to get comfortable. Grif smiled and then went to close the door behind him, but Angel ran up to Grif and hugged his leg and he smiled.
"You're... welcome?" Grif asked.
Angel looked up at Grif and closed his eyes and then ran to the couch and curled up next to Fluttershy. Grif yawned as Haley ran through the door and jumped on the bed and instantly fell asleep. "You've got the right idea." Grif said, jumping onto the bed.
It took Grif only a few seconds to fall asleep in the bed, which was currently the comfiest place he could ever dream of sleeping on.
Grif woke up to find that Fluttershy was standing next to him with a bowl. Grif groaned as he propped himself up.
"Ugh, my back is so damn stiff." Grif muttered sourly.
Fluttershy said nothing as she propped a wooden tray over him then placed the bowl on it.
"Uh, thanks?" Grif said.
Fluttershy smiled, and Grif noticed that her cheeks were a brilliant shade of crimson. She squeaked when she saw that he’d recognized this, and hurried out of the room, leaving Grif alone with his soup. Grif finished it quickly, finding himself hungrier than he had thought he was. After he finished, he got off the bed and caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror. His scars seem to have been treated and the more serious wounds were patched up. He groaned and left the room and Fluttershy was sitting on the couch with Angel.
"I'm glad to see you are up." Fluttershy said. "You were so... dead... to the world."
"How long was I asleep?" Grif asked.
"It was about seven in the evening when we got back, and it is almost noon now. I hope you don't mind, but I went in and treated your wounds while you were asleep."
"I don't mind at all. Thanks for patching me up."
"Not at all." Fluttershy said with a smile. "I like helping ponies just as much as I like helping animals."
"What a coincidence." Grif said with a laugh. "I love being helped."
Church and Twilight were sitting downstairs having a light breakfast when they heard a knock on the door. Twilight opened the door to be greeted by a flurry of balloons being launched at her. When the bombardment stopped, she looked up to see Pinkie with an abnormally large grin.
"Twilight!" Pinkie yelled. "Isn't it the most awesomeicious stupenderific thing ever?"
"What are you talking about." Twilight asked.
"It's the Cake twins’ birthday tomorrow!" Pinkie said, giddy with anticipation. "They're turning one year old."
"Oh right." Twilight said. "Then what are you doing here right now? Shouldn't you wait until tomorrow to have the party."
"Haven't you heard of a pre-party party?" Pinkie asked.
Twilight rolled her eyes but smiled.
"It will be a small party if it's just you, me and Church." Twilight said.
"Don't be silly Twi, I brought Caboose." Pinkie said.
"Hello." Caboose said, seemingly appearing from behind Twilight.
"How did you get in?" Twilight asked.
"It's our little secret." Pinkie answered for Caboose.
Church finished eating and left the kitchen to see what was happening.
"Church!" Caboose yelled, running around Church.
"Hey Caboose." Church said, confused. "What are you guys doing here?"
"They want to throw a pre-party party for the twins at the Sugarcube Corner." Twilight said.
"Okay then." Church said. "I've never heard of a pre-party party."
"Neither have I." Caboose said with excitement. "I am so excited I could just keep running."
Caboose kept running in circles around Church until Church got slightly annoyed.
"Caboose. Stop running." Church said.
"Okay." Caboose said, coming to a screeching halt.
"Geez, you're a party pooper." Pinkie said jokingly.
"You can poop parties?" Caboose gasped. "That sounds amaz-"
Church stuffed his hoof in Caboose’s mouth and sighed.
"Is it just going to be the four of us?" Church asked.
"Of course not silly, you're going to get the others with Caboose while me and Twilight set up." Pinkie said.
"I don't remember volunteering for this." Church said.
"Caboose was kind enough to volunteer your time." Pinkie said happily.
"Great." Church said sarcastically. "Thank you Caboose."
"See, I told you he would be happy!" Caboose said.
"Alright, let's make this quick though." Church grunted.
"Okay!" Caboose said, galloping out the door.
Twilight stared at Church and they both shrugged. Church then followed Caboose grudgingly. It took them a couple hours to tell the others, but eventually they all made their way back to the library.
"You're looking better." Simmons said to Grif.
"I feel better." Grif said. "Too bad you still look like shit."
"You're an asshole, you know that." Simmons said.
"Grif, don't disrespect others." Sarge said. "That's my job."
"I learned it from watching you!" Grif said over-dramatically.
The others then started to laugh and they then found themselves in front of the library where the door shot open and Caboose ran inside.
"Hi everypony!" Pinkie said happily. "Are you ready to pre-par-tay?"
"Totally!" Tucker said. "It's been awhile since I've been to a pre-party."
"You're kidding, right?" Church said.
"Fuck no man." Tucker said. "What, you've never been to one?"
Church face hooved as he shook his head.
"I knew you were lame." Tucker laughed.
"Fuck you."
"Sorry, I know you like dudes. But-" Tucker started.
"Tucker how are your balls feeling right now?" Church grunted, tensing his back leg.
Tucker glared at Church then decided to not say anything as they all made their way inside the library.
"So what is this party for exactly?" Simmons said, looking around.
"The Cakes had twins one year ago tomorrow!" Pinkie said.
Sarge squinted at Caboose, who was drawing on a piece of paper.
"So you have babies living in the same building as Caboose?" Sarge asked nervously.
"Well yeah, babies can't live on their own you silly!" Pinkie replied.
"Right." Sarge said, still watching Caboose. "What are you doing Caboose?"
"I am drawing a picture!" Caboose said. "It is hard to grab the crayons though."
"That's because you don't have any fingers." Tucker said.
"Oh my god, they took my hands!" Caboose yelled. "Ohhhhh, never mind, I remember now."
Church let out a deep sigh and glanced at the other stallions.
"I'm surrounded by idiots..." Church thought to himself, but found himself smiling.
"So Church, how are you liking it here?" Rarity asked.
"It's alright I guess." Church said. "How has Simmons been doing?"
"Fantastically." Rarity said happily. "He is a great help around my boutique. I don't think it’s been this organized in months."
"That's... surprising." Church said.
"I hope ya don't mind me askin'." Applejack said. "But why do you guys always seem to be at each others throats?"
"We're not at each others throats." Church said.
"But ya'll are always yellin' at each other..." Applejack said.
"Some things are just hard wired." Church said, without realizing the slight irony of his statement.
"Look Church, I made a picture of us!" Caboose yelled.
Caboose ran up to Church, holding a piece of paper in his teeth. There were two crudely drawn stick horses, one being blue and the other being light blue. Church looked at it and smiled awkwardly.
"Uh, thanks Caboose." Church said, grabbing it from him. "It looks... good?"
"Thank you Church! Hey wait, what if my special talent is drawing?" Caboose said looking at his blank flank.
"I don't know Caboose." Tucker said sarcastically. "I think eating crayons would be more your speed."
"Hey, yeah! I've always wondered what they tasted like!" Caboose said.
Caboose then ran to one of the crayons and tossed it in his mouth and bit it before anypony could stop him. He promptly spat it out and ran to the punch bowl and grabbed a drink. He then looked at his flank and frowned.
"Nope, that's not it." Caboose said. "They taste pretty bad."
"Maybe it’s being an idiot." Tucker said. "You seem to be pretty good at that."
"Maybe yours is being hit in the balls." Church said to Tucker. "You seem to be pretty good at that."
"Alright everypony, just settle down." Twilight said.
"Yeah, let's get this party started!" Pinkie yelled, slamming her hoof on the boombox which started playing music.
Church stood watching Pinkie and Caboose dance awkwardly for a while, then decided he would take a breather and take a step outside and Tucker followed.
"Pretty boring party, eh Church?" Tucker said. "If only we could get some actual drinks here, then it would be a party."
"Yeah." Church laughed. "How is it going with Rainbow Dash? She still crushing your balls?"
"Not recently." Tucker said, chuckling lightly. "But it's pretty good man. She is quick tempered, but at least she isn’t Tex. How is staying with Twilight?"
"It's alright I guess." Church sighed while looking at the moon.
Tucker stared at Church in silence for a bit. "You miss her, don't you?" Tucker asked abruptly.
"Of course I do you fucking idiot." Church muttered.
"Why don't you just forget her?" Tucker asked.
"I tried. Before Caboose forced me out I tried to let her go." Church said, then looked at the ground. "But no matter what, it's not enough in the end. I've tried loving her, I've tried to forget her but neither of those worked."
"Maybe you are supposed to do something else." Tucker suggested.
"No fucking shit. Do you have any other wonderful observations?"
"Hey man, no need to be a dick. I'm just trying to help."
"Tucker and help aren't exactly things you expect to hear being put together on a day to day basis." Church retorted.
"Whatever man. Quit being so fucking mopey."
"I don't exactly have a lot to be happy about these days." Church muttered.
"I know something that might make you happy." Tucker said.
"Oh yeah?" Church asked. "And what would that be?"
Tucker pointed to a window and Church looked inside to see everypony laughing. Caboose was holding hooves with Pinkie with a big smile on his face.
"As much of a pain in the ass Caboose is, I have to say he seems to be really happy here." Tucker said. "Probably the happiest I've ever seen him, and I'm kind of happy for him."
"You're happy for Caboose?" Church asked with a laugh.
"I know man, it surprised the fuck out of me too." Tucker said. "This place is just too damn happy to hate anything. And honestly, look at Caboose and tell me you don't feel happy for him."
Church then looked at his hooves and glanced at the drawing and he started to smile.
"You're right. I am kind of happy for him." Church said, then sighed. "Hey Tucker?"
"Yeah?"
"Thanks."
Church and Tucker then went back into the library.
"So is there anything fun to do around here besides party?" Grif asked. "Not that partying is a bad thing to do."
"Well, you could borrow one of my books if you want." Twilight said.
"Ugh, no thanks, I'm not an egghead." Grif said. "Simmons might be interested though, he's pretty fucking boring."
"Fuck you Grif." Simmons said.
"Yeah, you wish." Grif said smugly, sipping on a glass of punch. "So just books? Anything other than that?"
"You could always give Cloudsdale a try." Rainbow Dash said. "I'm sure the aerial sports teams wouldn't mind using you for practice."
"Forget I said anything." Grif muttered.
"You don't need to do a lot of things to have fun." Fluttershy said quietly. "The most fun I have is when I sit around with my animal friends and watch them play with each other."
Grif looked at Fluttershy and smiled tightly. Sarge glanced at Grif and hit him in the shoulder lightly and winked. Grif shook his head and glared at Sarge, though a goofy smile was glued to his muzzle.
"So what's going to be happening at the party tomorrow?" Church asked. "Is it going to be the same thing as this?"
"Don't be silly." Pinkie said. "How would little foals have fun at an adult pony party like this?"
Church looked over at Twilight who shrugged lazily. Sarge then glanced over at Caboose who was standing idly, not listening to the conversation.
"Hey Caboose?" Sarge muttered.
"Yes Sarge?" Caboose asked.
"Are you going to see the little ones at the party tomorrow?" Sarge asked.
"Of course I am! I wouldn't ever miss a Pinkie party!" Caboose said.
"Uh-huh." Sarge grunted. "Pinkie, mind coming outside? I need to tell you something."
"Okay Sarge." Pinkie said, hopping out the door, Sarge close behind her, closing the door behind them.
"What did you want to tell me?" Pinkie asked.
"Has Caboose met the babies yet?" Sarge asked quietly.
"No." Pinkie said, confused. "When I asked him if he wanted to meet them he started acting strange. His eyes were really scary and there was something else..."
"His voice changed, right?" Sarge asked nervously.
"Yeah. How did you know?" Pinkie asked.
"You don't want to know." Sarge said. "All you need to know is that Caboose should not go to the party tomorrow."
"Why is that, silly?" Pinkie asked.
"It is hard to explain, but it's not just his appearance that changes." Sarge said.
"What do you mean?" Pinkie asked.
"Long story short he goes crazy." Sarge said. "And not regular Caboose crazy. Dangerous crazy."
"Caboose? Dangerous? You must be confusing him for somepony else." Pinkie said.
Sarge stared at Pinkie, who just sat there smiling innocently.
"Never mind, just forget I said anything." Sarge said. "Go back in and have some punch."
"Great idea." Pinkie said happily, walking back into the punch bowl.
Sarge looked through the doorway at Caboose who was walking around and laughing. Sarge worried for what Caboose would do to the babies so he sighed and slowly walked up to Caboose.
"Hey Caboose." Sarge said quietly. "I need to tell you something but it is a secret. Want to hear it?"
"Sure." Caboose said.
"Alright, but we need to whisper, we don't want the others to hear." Sarge whispered.
"Oh that kind of secret." Caboose whispered back. "What is the secret?"
"Pinkie just told me that the party is going to be somewhere else tomorrow, so I need you to come to the farm and we’ll go together, okay?" Sarge said even more quietly. "Just don't tell anybody."
"Okay Sarge!" Caboose whispered back, not thinking of questioning him.
Everypony left the library after a couple more hours of partying. Tucker and Rainbow started to fly back to her place.
"Did you like the party?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"I've been to better." Tucker shrugged. "But it was fun."
"Pinkie’s parties will grow on you." Rainbow Dash said.
"Maybe." Tucker said. "So what are we going to do to get those tickets?"
"Tickets? Oh, the Wonderbolts. I completely forgot about them." Rainbow Dash admitted. "We still have a couple days until then, we'll just have to try to find some work tomorrow."
"What about the party?" Tucker asked.
Rainbow Dash looked at the ground and sighed sadly.
"It would make Pinkie sad if we didn't show up..." Rainbow Dash said quietly.
"So there is what? Four days until the show?" Tucker asked. "That should be enough time with the two of us working to make the money."
"Yeah." Rainbow Dash said, starting cheer up. "It will just be extremely hard."
"Bow-chika-bow-wow." Tucker said quietly enough so Rainbow Dash didn't hear, but then spoke up. "See, that's the spirit."
"I really hope we get to see them." Rainbow Dash said. "And hopefully they will remember me."
"Remember you? You've met them? That's pretty cool."
"I didn't just meet them." Rainbow Dash said smugly. "I saved their lives."
"You saved their lives? Of course they're going to remember you if you fucking saved them."
"It wasn't really a question, I was just thinking out loud."
"Okay." Tucker said. "Anyways, do you know any place that has a job opening?"
"None come to mind. But we can worry about that later. I want to go to bed so I can be well rested for tomorrow."
"Maybe we can see if any of your friends have any odd jobs to do or maybe some spare cash."
"Maybe."
Tucker and Rainbow Dash then arrived back at her place and they went straight to sleep.
Rainbow Dash awoke the next morning to find that Tucker wasn't in the bed. She sat up and looked around and couldn't see any sign of him. She rubbed her eyes and opened the bathroom door to take a shower. As she lowered her hooves from her eyes, she saw Tucker stepping out of the shower. Rainbow Dash yelped and slammed the door shut. Tucker chuckled and dried himself up and opened the door.
"Do you have any idea how rude it is to come in unannounced?" Tucker asked sarcastically.
Rainbow Dash glared at Tucker and he laughed. "I'm sorry, I didn't know you were in there." Rainbow Dash said while blushing. "I didn't mean to walk in on you."
"Sure you didn't." Tucker laughed. "I know that you wanted to catch a glimpse of mini-Tuck."
"Yeah I totally wanted to be scarred for life." Rainbow Dash said. "I'm sorry, I won't do it again."
"That's a shame. Alright, so are we going to the party or what?"
"Yeah, just give me some time to shower." Rainbow Dash muttered. "And if you need me you better knock."
"Are you saying I look like a gentlecolt who doesn't respect privacy?" Tucker asked, smiling sweetly
"Bite me." Rainbow Dash grunted.
Back at Sugarcube corner Caboose woke up and started to get out of the bed. This woke Pinkie up and she yawned.
"Watcha' doing Caboose?" Pinkie said.
"It's a secret." Caboose said quietly.
"A secret?" Pinkie asked. "I love secrets!"
"So do I!" Caboose said happily.
Pinkie then jumped off the bed and grabbed Cabooses leg.
"Can you tell me the secret?" Pinkie asked. "Pretty please."
"I don't know, Sarge told me to not tell anyone that I was going to the farm." Caboose said.
"You're going to the farm?" Pinkie asked.
"Yes." Caboose gasped. "How did you know? Can you read minds?"
"Why are you going to the farm?" Pinkie asked.
"Sarge told me that you told him and he told me that you moved the party somewhere else so we were going to go there together." Caboose said.
"That is a great idea!" Pinkie exclaimed.
"I know, Sarge is nice to walk with me there." Caboose said happily.
"No I mean we should move the party to the farm!" Pinkie said. "That would give Fluttershy’s animal friends lots of room to walk around!"
"That is an amazing idea!" Caboose said. "I will go tell Sarge!"
"Okay. I'll go get the others. And thank Sarge for me, okay?"
"Will do Pinkie!" Caboose said.
Caboose then went down the stairs and out the door and made his way to the farm. When he got there, Sarge was lying down under a tree with his stetson over his face.
"Good morning Sarge." Caboose said, running up to him.
"Good morning to you too blue." Sarge said.
Sarge took the hat off his face and placed it on his head then stood up.
"You look like a cowboy horse!" Caboose exclaimed. "Wait if you're a horse does that mean you ride a cowboy when you play?"
Sarge laughed slightly then shook his head. "Alright you ready to go?"
"Yes Sarge!" Caboose said, saluting weirdly. "And Pinkie told me to thank you."
"Thank me for what?" Sarge asked, confused.
"For letting us have the party here." Caboose said happily.
"You told her you were coming here?" Sarge asked with a mixture of nervousness and anger.
"No I didn't." Caboose said. "She is psychotic."
"It's psychic, and no she isn't." Sarge grunted.
Caboose looked at the ground and blinked.
"I think I told her I was coming here." Caboose said. "I'm sorry Sarge. I didn't mean to ruin the surprise party."
"I'll forgive you, I just need you to follow me in to the farm to set up." Sarge said.
"Okay." Caboose said as Sarge led Caboose into the barn.
"Okay you set up in there, and I'll go make sure nobody ruins the surprise." Sarge said.
"Good idea!" Caboose said, running into the barn.
Sarge then slammed the door and placed a piece of wood on it, locking Caboose in.
"This isn't going to be good..." Sarge muttered.
Sarge ran to the house and burst through the door. He found Applejack having breakfast and he walked up to her, eyes shifting from side to side. "Applejack. We have a problem." Sarge said bluntly.
"A problem?" Applejack asked.
"Yeah, one that could destroy the farm as we know it." Sarge grunted dryly.
"What d'ya mean? What's the problem?" Applejack asked nervously.
"I told Caboose to come come to the farm and he told Pinkie, now she wants to throw the party here." Sarge said.
"That's no problem, we have plenty of room for a party." Applejack said with a laugh.
"It ain't the party that is the real problem. It's Caboose." Sarge said
"Are you scared of Caboose?" Applejack asked.
"Yes, but not the Caboose you know." Sarge said.
"What could that sweet stallion do that makes you so nervous?" Applejack asked.
"A while back there was this AI that-" Sarge started.
"What is an AI?" Applejack asked, raising her brow.
"An artificial intelligence." Sarge said. "But there was this artificial intelligence named O'Malley and-"
"What in tarnation is an artificial intelligence?" Applejack asked.
Sarge did not know how to describe an AI. Sighing, he continued, "We'll just call it an evil spirit. So there was this evil spirit named O'Malley that found his way to where me and the blues were and started jumping in and out of our bodies to make us angry." Sarge explained. "But when he went into Caboose, it seems that he left something behind. When we were stuck in a strange place a while back, Caboose made himself get angry by thinking negative thoughts and he became this... demon. He managed to get us out. Last night I told him to come here, but I didn't plan on him telling the pink one"
"What made Caboose angry?" Applejack asked nervously.
"He started thinking about cats with spikes on them, but after he became angry he yelled that he hates babies." Sarge said. "I'm worried about what will happen if he sees them, and what he could do to them."
Back in Ponyville, Pinkie Pie was going to everypony’s home to tell them about the change of plans. It only took her half an hour to gather all of them. Fluttershy stayed behind to gather all the animals.
"Does Applejack know we are going to be at the farm?" Twilight asked.
"Of course she does, Sarge must have told her!" Pinkie laughed.
"I don't know about that. Sarge doesn't like to include others in his plans." Grif said sourly. "When he does they usually involve trying to kill me." The girls started to giggle.
"I find it funny that they think you're joking." Simmons said quietly into Grif’s ear.
"Tell me about it." Grif said sourly, then started to laugh.
"Here we are." Twilight said. "Sweet Apple Acres, home of the Apple family."
Applejack and Sarge heard Twilight’s announcement. They shared a quick glance with each other before they went outside to greet them.
"Hey there everypony." Applejack said. "Where are the twins?"
"We can't bring the twins until we have made sure the party is all prepared." Pinkie said, hopping to the barn. "Say, why is this log in the door?"
Pinkie removed the wood and opened the door to be met with a barrage of pink and blue confettis. When the thin papers settled she saw Caboose sitting in the middle of the building with a party hat on.
"I don't remember seeing this stuff in here before I locked you i-, I mean uh, left you here to prepare." Sarge said. "Where did all of this stuff come from?"
"You told me to set up the party so I made some confetti and some hats." Caboose said, pointing to a table. "I even made some punch."
"How the hell did you manage to do that if you were in here with nothing?" Tucker asked.
Caboose looked at Pinkie and she winked back at him.
"It's a secret." Caboose said with a smile.
"Well, it looks like Caboose has everything under control." Pinkie said. "I'll go get the twins!"
Pinkie then hopped out the door. Sarge watched her while trying to think of something to prevent Caboose from meeting the babies. Applejack eyed Sarge who looked deep in thought.
"Hey Caboose." Applejack said. "Why don't ya have any snacks made? We are on an apple farm so you could have made some treats."
"I'm sorry." Caboose said sadly.
"Don't ya fret Caboose." Applejack said happily. "I can show you one of our families recipes that you can cook up faster than you can say lickety split."
"Lickety split." Caboose said simply.
Applejack laughed, then looked at Sarge who was smiling at her, knowing what she was doing. She smiled back at him then started to leave the farm house.
"C'mon, I'll show you where the kitchen is." Applejack said, leaving the building.
"Okay." Caboose said excitedly, following Applejack.
"Keep him away from the knives." Tucker said as Caboose left.
As Tucker finished his proclamation, Fluttershy walked into the barn with many small animals following her. The other ponies watched as Fluttershy corralled all the critters to the back of the barn. "I know I don't have to tell you but I need you to be on your best behavior." Fluttershy said to the animals. The animals then nodded as she turned and trotted up to the others. "I hope that the twins aren't afraid of them."
"I think there is a better chance of the twins scaring the animals." Twilight said with a laugh.
"I think I'm going to go help Applejack and Caboose with the cooking." Sarge said.
"Sarge you don't seem like the kind of guy that would be in to cooking to me." Tucker scoffed.
"Someone has to make sure Caboose doesn't go and burn the place down." Sarge said with a smile.
Sarge suddenly sped up when he realized Caboose burning down the farm was more than likely.
"Sarge seems to be acting weird." Grif said.
"I know what you mean." Simmons said. "He seems very nervous for some reason."
Sarge walked into the kitchen, where Granny Smith and Applejack were at the stove while Caboose was sitting at a table, mixing something together in a bowl.
"Sarge look! I'm helping!" Caboose said happily.
"Uh, keep up the good work." Sarge said.
"Okay!" Caboose chirped.
"So what are you making?" Sarge asked.
"Apple family apple cake." Granny Smith said while slicing an apple.
"Didja come here to help?" Applejack asked.
"Just came to make sure that Caboose hadn't destroyed anything." Sarge laughed.
"I'm sorry Sarge, I will try harder." Caboose said, now vigorously mixing the substance.
A moment later, Caboose stopped and looked in the bowl and frowned. "I'm sorry, I tried my hardest to make it explode." Caboose said sadly.
Granny Smith walked up to the table and looked in the bowl and smiled.
"Why, you must be the best mixer I've done seen in my life." Granny Smith said happily, patting Caboose on the back.
"I'm the best you've seen?" Caboose gasped. "I am amazing."
"Good for you Caboose." Sarge said. "I'm gonna go use the stallion’s room."
Pinkie trotted towards the barn with Pound Cake and Pumpkin Cake sitting on her back. She burst through the door, humming lightly.
"Hey everypony, the party foals are here!" Pinkie exclaimed.
"Hey little guys." Grif said while approaching Pinkie. "What are their names?"
"The cutesy-wootsy little unicorn is Pumpkin Cake, and the aww-dorable pegasus is Pound Cake." Pinkie said. She then turned and looked at the twins. "This is Grif. Say hello to Grif!"
The twins looked at Grif and gurgled happily. This caused Grif to laugh.
"I like them already." Grif said with a chuckle. "They seem to like me."
"Give it time." Simmons said.
Grif glared at Simmons, then they both broke out laughing. Pinkie grabbed the twins and placed them on the floor near the animals.
"Where is Caboose?" Pinkie asked.
"He is in the kitchen baking with Applejack." Church said. "I'm a bit worried, I haven't heard any screaming yet."
"I wonder what they're baking?" Pinkie asked.
"Why don't you go check? We'll keep an eye on the birthday twins." Twilight said.
"Okay." Pinkie said, hopping out the door.
Applejack pulled the cake out of the oven and started placing caramelized apples on the top. After she finished decorating, she cut the cake into slices and put one candle in two of the slices. Pinkie walked into the room and looked at the cake and started grinning.
"That looks delicious Granny Smith!" Pinkie exclaimed, running up to the cake.
"Thank ya' Pinkie." Granny Smith said. "Caboose was more than helpful with the baking though."
"I stirred a bowl!" Caboose said excitedly.
"Good job Caboose." Pinkie laughed. "How about we go and bring the cake to the twins!"
"I hope they like it." Applejack said.
"I'm sure they will." Pinkie assured her. "Let's go, I'm so excited right now."
Applejack grabbed the platter with the cake on it and left the kitchen. Pinkie and Caboose smiled and followed her out the door. Sarge returned to the room and looked around.
"Where did AJ and Caboose go?" Sarge grunted.
"They went to bring the cake to the foals." Granny Smith said, wiping flour off of her hooves.
Sarge’s eyes darted to the door and he galloped at full speed to the barn. He burst through the door, expecting the worst. But what he found was Caboose sitting next to the little ones, laughing and eating cake. He watched curiously as Caboose was making silly faces to the young ones.
"Caboose... you're not angry?" Sarge asked, confused at the display.
"Why would I be angry?" Caboose asked innocently.
"I thought babies made you angry." Sarge said.
"These aren't babies, they are small ponies." Caboose said. "They are two completely different things."
Sarges eye twitched furiously and his flank dropped to the ground. He glared at Caboose, then his features softened. "Of course they are." Sarge said.
"I don't know why ya got so worried Sarge." Applejack said. "Caboose is gittin' along better with the foals than a bee to flowers."
"Yeah. I guess I was just a little worked out from buckin' those apples." Sarge said, laughing roughly.
"This is a great party Caboose." Pinkie said, hugging Caboose. "I can't wait for my birthday. I hope you can throw me a party as nice as this."
"I will not throw you a party as nice as this." Caboose said. "I will throw you the greatest party ever!"
"The greatest party ever?" Pinkie gasped. "Is that even possible?"
"Is what possible?" Caboose asked.
Before Pinkie could answer, the two foals crawled up to Caboose and hugged his back legs. He leaned over and looked at them between his legs.
"Hello little ones!" Caboose said. "Why are you upside down?"
Caboose then lifted one of his back legs and placed Pound Cake on his back. Once Pound Cake was settled in, he did the same for Pumpkin Cake. Caboose smiled and ran outside and started to run around a tree, laughing wildly. Everypony smiled and went outside to watch them play. Everypony except Sarge. Simmons and Grif were halfway out the door before they stopped.
"What's on your mind Sarge?" Simmons asked.
"Nothing." Sarge mumbled, walking towards the door.
Simmons looked at Grif and they both shared a shrug.
"Sarge, why do you look so... annoyed?" Simmons asked.
"He means more than usual." Grif added.
"I don't know." Sarge grunted. Sarge looked at Caboose who was now hopping around the tree.
"Sarge... are you mad about something?" Grif asked.
"No, it's just that I worked my flank off to prevent Caboose from meeting the little ones." Sarge said. "I was under the impression that he would go crazy at the sight of them."
"What would make him do that?" Grif asked.
"Let's just say when O'Malley was in Caboose's mind he taught him how to get angry." Sarge said. "Remember a while back when you re-configured that telepowatchamacallit?"
"Yeah..." Simmons said with a nod.
"Before we got to it, there was a group of idiots standing in between us and it." Sarge said. "Caboose got angry and went berserk on their dumb asses and killed them all so we could escape."
"Caboose did that?" Grif asked.
Sarge nodded.
"Then why are you annoyed?" Simmons asked. "It seems like everything went well..."
"That's just it. All that build up, just kaput." Sarge said. "It's like something out of a horribly written story."
Caboose put the foals on the ground and sat down next to a tree, breathing harder than usual. "I'm tired." Caboose stated plainly.
"Generally that's what happens when you run for an hour straight." Church replied.
Caboose yawned. He then glanced at his flank and started to grin. "I got my marky thingy!" Caboose exclaimed, hopping up and down, exhaustion suddenly dissipated.
"What is it? What is it?" Pinkie asked.
Pinkie ran up to Caboose and looked at his cutie mark, her smile spread from ear to ear.
"It looks just like Pinkie’s..." Rarity said.
"Yeah, but the top is different for some reason." Twilight said.
It was a trio of balloons, the left and right ones were light blue and the one in the middle was pink. But the pink one wasn't a regular balloon. It was the shape of a heart.
"This is awesome!" Caboose yelled.
"I was half expecting your mark to be a dunce cap." Tucker said.
"Nice going Caboose." Church said, punching Tucker in the shoulder for his reply.
"Your special talent is the same as mine!" Pinkie said, hugging Caboose.
"Your special talent is blowing balloons?"
"No silly, it's throwing parties."
"I am just about to be brilliant!" Caboose exclaimed. "If we both make a party together, we can make it a double party!"
"A double party?" Pinkie gasped. "That is brilliant."
The Cake twins crawled up to Caboose and started playing with his hooves. "Thank you for letting me throw a party for you." The little ones giggled and hugged him as the mares all quietly cooed at the sight.
"It's enough to make you sick." Grif said, dry heaving sarcastically.
"Tell me about it..." Sarge said, before he broke out in laughter. "Oh well, good for him. He’s having a good time."
"Sarge... are you happy?" Simmons asked.
"For a blue?" Grif added.
"Caboose is surprisingly a good kid." Sarge grunted. "He may be blue, but I have a feeling he is all red on the inside."
"He is all red on the inside." Simmons said matter-of-factly.
"That's the spirit Simmons!" Sarge said.
"No, I meant..." Simmons started. "You know what? Never mind."
Pumpkin and Pound both yawned and lay down next to Pinkie and Caboose. "Look's like Caboose ain't the only one who’s plum tuckered out." Applejack said.
"I don't like plums though." Caboose said.
"You're right they really do look pooped." Pinkie said, slowly picking up Pumpkin Cake. "I guess I have to bring them back home so they can go to sleepy-weepy."
"Does this mean that the party is over?" Caboose asked.
"Sorry Caboose, but me n' Sarge need to clean up the barn right quick." Applejack said.
"What? I don't want to clean up." Sarge said. "Simmons! Grif! I order you two to clean up the barn."
"Hey Sarge, I don't know if you noticed but we aren't soldiers right now." Grif said. "We don't have to take any of your shit."
"Besides, Rarity needs my help tomorrow with a client." Simmons said.
"Simmons, having sex for money? Even I have to admit that that is pretty scandalous." Grif chuckled.
"I hate you so fucking much." Simmons muttered.
"Sarge, they weren't the ones that made the party happen here, it was you." Applejack said. "That means it's your job to help clean."
"Dammit." Sarge muttered. "I hate cleaning."
Grif chuckled and started to walk away with Fluttershy.
"Have fun Sarge." Grif chirped happily.
"Let us go Simmons. We must be well rested for the work of art we will be making tomorrow." Rarity said.
Simmons nodded as Pinkie took Pound Cake and placed him on her back with Pumpkin Cake and dragged Caboose up to his hooves.
"We should get going too." Pinkie said. "Thanks for letting us have the party here Sarge."
"Yeah, yeah." Sarge grumbled.
"Good night Sarge." Caboose yawned.
"Night." Sarge said.
The others then followed suit, said their goodbyes and departed the farm. Tucker nudged Rainbow Dash in the side and motioned his head to the others. Rainbow Dash nodded and cleared her throat. "Hey Rarity?"
"Yes Rainbow Dash, how may I help you?" Rarity said.
"I was just wondering if maybe you need any help at the boutique." Rainbow Dash said. "Me and Tucker need to make some bits."
Rarity raised her brow and stared at Rainbow Dash.
"What do you need the money for?" Rarity asked.
"Well it's just that the Wonderbolts are in town in the next few days and me and Tucker wanted to go see them." Rainbow Dash said.
"Sorry Dashie, but I don't have any work for you." Rarity said sincerely.
"Oh." Rainbow Dash said sadly. "Does anybody else have anything we can do?"
"You can come by Sugarcube Corner and bake with me." Pinkie said.
"Really?" Rainbow Dash asked happily. "That would be awesome. Thanks Pinkie!"
"No problem." Pinkie said happily.
"Come on Tucker, we'll need to hit the hay early tonight if we're going to be working all day tomorrow." Rainbow Dash said, taking off straight towards her house.
"Fuck." Tucker muttered under his breath, flying after Rainbow Dash.
"I don't think Tucker is the best choice for a cook." Grif said.
"The same could have been said about Caboose, but he seems to have done well." Church said.
"Thanks Church." Caboose said groggily.
Soon they all split up and went to their homes for a good sleep. In just an hour, everypony was asleep.
Everypony except for Simmons, who had decided to stay up a bit longer to practice using magic, interested in seeing what else he could do. He decided to start with something small. He focused on the letters that were still on the table and he lifted a couple into the air. He smiled at his success and slowly widened his focus to encompass more and more of the cards. Soon enough he had all of them levitating just above the table and he closed his eyes and started organizing them by street name. He opened his eyes and felt a rush to his head, staggering as he suddenly he felt extremely tired.
"Woah." Simmons groaned. "Maybe I'm trying to raise the bar a little too fast."
Simmons then piled the messages neatly, keeping them organized and he released his magical grip on the letters. The pounding in his head slowly disappeared. However, he decided against trying any more magic, instead opting to go to sleep instead. He wouldn't be much help to Rarity if he was tired and sick.
"Are you excited to make some food?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Not really, I'll probably just fucking burn it." Tucker laughed.
"I'm sure you'll do fine." Rainbow Dash said encouragingly.
Rainbow Dash knocked on the door and Pinkie answered with a smile.
"You're here!" Pinkie exclaimed happily.
"Yeah, we really need the cash." Rainbow Dash said. "Listen Pinkie I really appreciate you letting us help you."
"Not at all, it's the least I could do for my friend." Pinkie said.
"Yeah. Say where is Caboose?" Tucker asked.
"Don't worry about him, he is just preheating the oven." Pinkie said.
"Well, this place will be burning down any second now." Tucker laughed.
Rainbow Dash and Tucker started giggling but Pinkie just stared at him with a smile.
"You ready to get cookin'?" Pinkie asked.
"Yeah whatever. What are we making?" Tucker asked.
"We're just going to be making a bunch of cupcakes, as we have just received a large order for them." Pinkie said.
"Okay cool. I can dig cupcakes." Tucker said. "What kind are we making."
"It's a secret." Pinkie said.
Tucker raised his brow at Rainbow Dash who just shrugged in return. The pair then followed Pinkie into the kitchen and he looked at the oven.
"Look, Caboose didn't even turn the fucking oven on." Tucker said.
Tucker looked to the left and saw Rainbow Dash lying on the ground.
"Hey what happened to her?" Tucker asked.
"The same thing that's going to happen to you." Caboose said.
"Wha-" Tucker started before he lost consciousness.
When Tucker woke up, he found himself chained to a table in a dark room. He grunted and tried to break free, but he gave up after a couple of minutes as there were no signs of his bindings letting up. Instead he let his eyes adjust to the dark. His heart filled with horror as the wall came into focus. The wall was obscured by knives and other tools, all caked with what appeared to be blood. He resumed his struggle, trying to release himself once more, but to no avail. Tucker swallowed and a harsh pain shot through his throat.
"Is anybody there?" Tucker croaked weakly. Tucker licked his lips and swallowed some saliva to moisten his throat. It still hurt when he breathed, but it was significantly lessened. "Is anybody here?" Tucker asked, clearly this time.
No answer was given to him. He knew better than to waste his breath on screaming, instead he decided to look around the room. The walls had strange wallpaper on them. It looked as though it was made out of scraps of fur. "Not much of an interior designer." Tucker muttered sarcastically.
Tucker then noticed a dripping sound coming from next to him, and when he cocked his head to the left to see he flinched. There was a ponies corpse sitting next to him. Except it wasn't just a corpse, it's skin was completely torn off, but there were weird bones sticking out of the side.
"What the fuck?" Tucker said loudly. "Where the fuck am I?"
As Tucker continued scanning the corpse, he noticed that there was a patch left on its flank, and when he saw what was on it, his heart dropped. It was Rainbow Dash’s cutie mark. Tucker had to choke back the vomit that was threatening to spew out.
"Rainbow Dash..." Tucker said weakly, a tear forming in his eye.
Tucker then heard a door slam open in front of him, and light poured into the room. Tucker closed his eyes as they burned when he looked ahead. When he reopened them a second later, there was utter darkness again. This time, however, Tucker felt a presence in the room.
"Who's there?" Tucker asked nervously.
He gazed into the darkness, eyes now maladjusted due to the sudden changes in lighting. He was able to make out a figure staring at him from where he assumed the door was.
"Good, you're up." A raspy voice said.
"Who the fuck are you? What the fuck did you do to Rainbow Dash?" Tucker yelled angrily through the pain in his neck.
"You're in no position to be asking questions Tucker." The voice said.
The mention of his name had his spine shivering with fright.
"Caboose? Is that you?" Tucker asked weakly.
"Aw, you ruined the surprise." Caboose said sarcastically, flicking a switch which made a light turn on above Tucker.
Tucker quickly closed his eyes against the renewed onslaught. When he opened them, he yelled at the sight in front of him. Caboose was standing there, eyes completely black and seemingly devoid of life. Caboose was also wearing a cloak. It took Tucker a couple seconds to realize that this cloak had several pairs of wings on it, and it was all too clear to him that those weren't fake wings.
"Do you like it?" Caboose giggled, spinning in a slow circle.
"What the fuck Caboose?" Tucker said angrily. "What the fuck do you think you're doing?"
"Making cupcakes of course."
Tucker eyes dilated when he realized what he meant.
"What? Does Pinkie know that you're going to be fucking murdering me?" Tucker yelled, angry tears streaming out of his eyes.
"Of course silly, who else do you think carved Rainbow Dash up?"
"I always knew you were crazy, but I didn't think you were fucking sick." Tucker growled.
"Oh please, you're being far too kind." Caboose said with a laugh.
"How the hell do you think the others will react once they find out what the fuck you're doing?" Tucker asked.
"I'm sure they would be appalled." Pinkie said, appearing from his side brandishing a blow torch. "But I think they will love the cupcakes. They're my own special recipe."
"Let me go, you stupid cunt." Tucker yelled, trying to free himself.
"Don't wear yourself out." Pinkie tutted. "If you struggle too much then it just doesn't taste the same."
"Bite me." Tucker grunted.
"I plan on it." Pinkie laughed wickedly. "Now that we’ve warmed up on little Dashie over there, I think we can make it even more painful and much longer."
"Help!" Tucker yelled. "These fuckers are trying to kill me!"
Caboose walked up to Tucker and punched him in the jaw.
"You should have heard the way Dashie squealed. It was adorable." Pinkie giggled. "Even through all the pain, she kept thinking of you alone. She begged me to let you free. Her last breath was your name."
Tucker gazed at Rainbow Dash, tears streaming down his face. Caboose then walked up to Tucker and placed a spike on one of his wings. He then grabbed a hammer with the other one and slammed the nail in. Tucker screamed in pain as Caboose pounded a second nail into his other wing.
"Before you lose your voice, do you have any last, inspiring words?" Pinkie asked.
"Yeah." Tucker said. "I hope you choke you fucking bitch."
Pinkie and Caboose both shared a dark laugh as Caboose placed another spike in Tuckers mouth this time. Tucker closed his eyes shut and felt the spike go through as Caboose slammed the hammer down.
“Tucker?” Caboose asked
Tucker lunged straight up and yelped. His face was covered in a cold sweat and his eyes were bloodshot.
"Tucker what's wrong?" Rainbow Dash asked with a worried expression on her face. "You kept yelling in your sleep. It was beginning to make me scared."
Tucker looked over at Rainbow Dash and didn't say anything. Instead he hugged her tightly.
"Tucker what happened?" Rainbow Dash asked, pushing Tucker off of herself.
"Don't worry about it." Tucker said, laughing nervously.
"Your face is pale, your eyes are bloodshot and your voice is cracking. Plus you kept kicking and screaming, so I kind of have a reason to worry."
Tucker rubbed his face and then started to laugh. "I just had a nightmare." Tucker muttered. "But it seemed like a lot more than a nightmare. It felt so fucking real."
"What happened in it?" Rainbow Dash asked curiously. Tucker just shook his head. "Come on, don't be such a baby, tell me what was it about?"
"Honestly, you really fucking don't want to know." Tucker replied, lying back down.
"How bad could it have been?" Rainbow Dash chortled .
Tucker looked over at Rainbow Dash with no expression on his face. Rainbow Dash lied back down and sighed.
"We should get up soon anyways, it's almost time to go help Pinkie." Rainbow Dash said.
"Fuck that."
"Don't you want to go see the Wonderbolts?" Rainbow Dash asked.
Tucker muttered something under his breath and got off the bed. He went to the shower and turned it on and stood there rubbing his face.
"It was just a fucking dream. I can't let it get to me." Tucker groaned and then chuckled lightly. "Besides, if Caboose had a knife the only thing he would end up killing is himself."
After a couple of minutes he got out of the shower and dried off.
"Feeling better?" Rainbow Dash laughed.
"You don't think a dream would bother me that much, do you?" Tucker said. "I was just kidding around."
"I don't know, that looked pretty genuine to me." Rainbow Dash said with a smirk.
"Screw you." Tucker pouted, but then smiled again. "You look like you had a good night’s sleep."
"Yeah, I was having the greatest dream before you woke me up." Rainbow Dash said.
"Oh really? What were we doing in it?" Tucker asked, winking at her.
"You wish." Rainbow Dash said, closing the door behind her.
Tucker made his way down the stairs and into the kitchen. He looked around and then grunted. "I wish she had stuff to eat besides just bread and wheat..."
Rainbow Dash dried herself off and made her way downstairs to find Tucker fiddling with a sandwich.
"Aw, you're not making me one?" Rainbow Dash asked sarcastically.
"Yeah yeah, hold your horses." Tucker said, smiling dryly.
When Tucker finished with his he set to work on a second one. Rainbow Dash grabbed the one Tucker had already made and took a bite out of it.
"You know, this isn't that bad." Rainbow Dash said. "I thought you said you didn't know how to cook."
"Making a sandwich isn't cooking." Tucker muttered.
"Well keep up the good work. I might hire you as my personal chef." Rainbow Dash said
"Shit, does this mean I'm the woman?" Tucker asked.
"Pretty much." Rainbow Dash said, smirking at Tucker.
"God dammit." Tucker muttered.
Over at Sugarcube Corner, Pinkie was just waking up. She yawned and hopped off the bed before showering. When she came out she saw that Caboose was still sprawled across the bed, snoring loudly.
"Wake up Boosey," Pinkie sang.
"I don't want to go to school today." Caboose whined.
Pinkie smiled and shook her head. She threw the cover back on Caboose and she left the room. She made her way down to the kitchen and turned on the oven. As she did, Mr. Cake walked into the room.
"Pinkie you might have to work a little bit longer today." Mr. Cake said. "We have a large order placed for a party. We will need an extra twelve dozen cupcakes."
"Twelve dozen." Pinkie said. "Got it."
"Should I go get Caboose to help you?" Mr. Cake asked.
"No it's okay, Rainbow Dash is coming over and she is bringing Tucker to help me." Pinkie said.
"Alrighty then. Me and the Mrs. are going out for a bit, so take care." Mr. Cake said, leaving the room.
"Will do Mr. Cake!" Pinkie said. "I wonder when Tucker and Dashie are going to get here."
She shrugged at her own question as she broke some eggs into a bowl, topping it with a pinch of salt. She stirred vigorously for a minute until she ended up with the thick foam. Satisfied with the foam, she then added some lemon juice, vanilla and sugar, quickly whipping the concoction into a homogeneous mess. Satisfied with this result, she grabbed a second bowl and promptly filled it with flour, cocoa and baking soda, quickly folding the dry ingredients together. She then mixed the contents of the two bowls, blended them, and spooned the resulting mixture into a cupcake pan, already prepared with the cupcake shells. She threw it in the oven just as the the doorbell rang.
"Hey Rainbow Dash, you're finally here!" Pinkie said. "I already started, so come on in."
"Where is Caboose?" Tucker asked.
"He's still sleeping." Pinkie said.
Tucker sighed but looked at Rainbow Dash and nodded. The trio then went back to the kitchen.
"So what kind of cupcakes are we making?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Oooo, they're the best cupcakes ever!" Pinkie said. "They're my own special recipe."
And with that, Tucker booked it out of the kitchen.
"What's eating him?" Pinkie asked.
"I don't know." Rainbow Dash muttered. "Let's just get to work without him."
Tucker kept running until he found himself in front of the library. He burst through the door and looked around the room. Church was sitting on a chair and he glanced at Tucker worriedly. His face was paler than usual and he was sweating. "Tucker, is that you?" Church asked.
"No it's fucking Jesus H. Christ." Tucker said. "Who else is as sexiful as me?"
"What are you doing here?" Church asked.
"Oh I just thought I would, uh, check to see what you're up to." Tucker said.
"You wanted to see... what I was up to?" Church asked curiously.
"You're right, I didn't realize what I was saying until I had said it." Tucker said. "Okay, well I had this fucking nightmare and it really got to me man."
"Aw, poor Tucker, did you wet the bed too?" Church asked with a chuckle.
"Fuck you you asshole. I'm serious it was some fucked up shit." Tucker said.
"Alright, tell me what happened in your little nightmare."
"Caboose and Pinkie were using ponies as the main ingredient to cupcakes." Tucker said with a straight face.
Church burst out laughing and fell to the ground.
"You know what? You're a prick." Tucker said.
Simmons was sitting at the table having his breakfast when the doorbell rang. He put the food back on his plate and hopped off of the chair. However, Rarity had run down the stairs and opened the door by the time Simmons had even managed to enter the front room. There was a tall, white unicorn with dark red hair smiling at the pair, with a bag hanging off of his back. His cutie mark was a film reel. Rarity couldn’t help but feel as if she had seen him before.
"Hello, you must be Rarity." The unicorn said with a smile. He dropped the bag he was carrying next to the door and extended his hoof. "It is a pleasure to meet you."
"The pleasure is all mine." Rarity said, shaking the unicorns hoof. "You must be Fancypants' friend, mr..."
"Westhoof. Flint Westhoof." Flint said.
"The Flint Westhoof?" Rarity gawked.
"At your service." Flint said, bowing slightly. He then looked at Simmons, noting his blank flank with curiosity.
"Who is Flint Westhoof?" Simmons asked.
"I am one of Equestria’s most famous actors. You must have seen one of my many works." Flint said with a smile. "Surely either 'A Fistful of Bits' or 'For A Few Bits More' rings a bell. How about 'A Perfect Equestria'? No? 'The Unicorn, The Pegasus and The Pony'?"
Simmons shook his head at each of the titles, not even sure if they were plays or movies or the like.
"Odd. Maybe I'll have to invite you along next time I have a performance." Flint said. "I am told they are excellent."
"Sounds... good." Simmons said, not sure what to say to him.
"I should hope so." Flint said with a smile. "Enough about me, let's say we get started on the suit then, hm?"
"Yes, right away sir." Rarity said. "Follow me and we shall get started."
Simmons and Flint nodded and went up the stairs with Rarity in to her studio. Flint saw the small platform and stepped on it without being told.
"How long is this expected to take?" Flint asked. "I am in no hurry to leave though, don't take this as a sign of impatience but as a sign of curiosity."
"Usually it would take an hour or two, but because of your build I would say... at least four." Rarity said.
"I didn't expect to be standing for that long." Flint chuckled. "I can't be held accountable for if I fall from exhaustion."
"Just tell Simmons when you start to feel weary." Rarity said while gathering cloths. "He is adept at magic, and I have taught him a spell to hold ponies in place."
"Ah, I was told that you were a solo artist. I did not expect an assistant." Flint said.
"What else would I be?" Simmons asked.
"I was under the assumption that you two were special someponies." Flint suggested.
Rarity and Simmons looked at each other and smiled.
"No, we're just friends." Simmons said. "We don't have that much in common."
"That's a shame, you two would make a cute couple." Flint said. "Let us begin."
Rarity nodded and started to take Flint’s measurements, then immediately set off to work. She had worked for two hours when Flint coughed.
"Now?" Simmons asked.
Flint nodded and Simmons started the spell. Around the third hour mark, Simmons started to strain from the over use of magic, but he kept pushing.
"I hope you don't hurt yourself on my account." Flint said. Flint then focused on Simmons and broke the spell. Before Simmons said anything Flint spoke once again. "I appreciate the rest, uh... what was your name? I don't think I caught it."
"Simmons."
"Well I thank you Simmons, but I think I can stand the rest of the way." Flint said with a smile.
Simmons nodded gratefully and rubbed his temples lightly. After another hour, Rarity finished up one last stitch and slowly backed away.
"Are we finished already?" Flint asked.
"Almost, it just needs a finishing touch..." Rarity said, walking around Flint, looking for any discrepancies.
Simmons looked at the silver tuxedo that covered Flints entire torso.
"I think I have an idea." Simmons muttered.
"What is it?" Rarity asked.
"Hang on a second..." Simmons said.
Simmons grabbed a needle and some black thread and walked up to Flint. He used magic to lift the needle and he started to stitch a small symbol on the side of the suit. He backed away and looked it over.
"What did you do?" Rarity asked bluntly.
"I have no idea." Simmons said.
"What? What is it?" Flint asked.
Flint walked up to a mirror and looked at his side in the mirror. The symbol that Simmons had stitched on looked exactly like Flint’s cutie mark.
"Nopony puts a cutie mark on clothing." Rarity said. "It is redundant."
"Sorry, I was just trying to help." Simmons said diminutively.
"I for one like it. I believe that it makes this suit unique," Flint said, looking into the mirror. "Nice thinking Simmons."
"You... like it?" Simmons asked.
"Positively. In fact, I believe that you two may have just started a new fashion trend." Flint said. "Follow me."
Flint walked down the stairs and grabbed the bag he had brought, and reached into it and pulled out a couple pieces of paper. He then held them out to Simmons and Rarity who had followed him down.
"What is this?" Simmons asked.
"They are a pair of tickets." Flint said simply. "The Wonderbolts are having a show in two days and I would appreciate if you came with me as guests."
"That is very generous of you." Rarity said. "Are you sure you want to give these to us?"
"Of course. Consider them a bonus for your excellent work." Flint said, raising his brow at Simmons.
"What's wrong?" Rarity asked.
"For some reason I thought that Simmons over there was still a blank flank. I must have been mistaken." Flint said, leaving the boutique. "Have a fine day and thank you once again for the suit."
Rarity and Simmons then looked at his flank and saw the symbol. It was a tuxedo with a needle and black thread overlapping it.
Simmons was pacing back and forth, stopping every so often to glare at his cutie mark. "What? That's my special talent?" Simmons yelled.
"What is the problem with it?" Rarity asked.
"If any of the guys see this I will be a laughing stock." Simmons moaned.
"I for one think it looks magnificent." Rarity said. "What did you think your talent would be?"
"I assumed mine would be something... I don't know... good." Simmons said. "A needle and thread isn't exactly my definition of masculine."
"I think that it describes you pretty well." Rarity said.
"How do you figure?" Simmons asked.
"Well for one, it shows that you have class." Rarity said. "Making garments is also a lot of hard work and requires you to think ahead. Most people can't handle that sort of workload."
"Well when you put it that way..." Simmons said with a smile, then shook it off. "But if Sarge sees it I'll never hear the end of it..."
"Do you really look up to him that much?" Rarity asked.
"Well, not really." Simmons said. "It's just that he is my superior so I have to respect him."
"He may have been your superior back where you came from, but here you two are equal." Rarity said.
"Hey yeah!" Simmons said happily. "You're right."
"Simmons, I just want to apologize for yelling back there." Rarity said sincerely. "I thought you ruined the suit, but it turns out you very well may have saved it."
"Don't worry about it, I shouldn't have done that without running it by you first." Simmons said.
Rarity looked in to Simmons’ eyes and smiled.
"Say Simmons? You wouldn't be interested in..." Rarity started. "Never mind."
"Interested in what?" Simmons asked, his curiosity aroused.
"I was just curious if you would care to be hired here." Rarity said. "I could use somepony like you who could help around here."
Simmons stared at her blankly until he grasped what she had said. "No. I mean, I don't know... we will have to go back to our world soon. I don't want to have a job just to be sent back right away."
"Do you have to leave though?" Rarity asked. "What is stopping you from staying?"
Simmons hadn’t thought of this. He was under the impression that he and the others would only be here briefly, and once they received their cutie marks they would be on their way. So in response he just shrugged. Rarity frowned slightly, noticing the tickets just off to the side.
"Well, the offer is still open if you do decide stay." Rarity said. "I hope you are still available to go see the Wonderbolts though."
"I think I might have some spare time." Simmons said.
"Good." Rarity said, smiling at Simmons who was smiling in return. "But you may need something to wear when we go. After all we want you to look your best if Westhoof is going to be introducing us to other important ponies."
"Sounds good." Simmons said with a smile.
"Shall we get started?" Rarity asked.
"I'd love to. Maybe I can help as well. After all, it is my talent." Rarity and Simmons shared a smile and walked upstairs to start on Simmons suit.
Over at Sweet Apple Acres, Sarge was laying under a tree, watching Winona run after a ball that Applejack kept throwing. "There he is girls." Applebloom’s voice called out.
Sarge glanced over to see Applebloom running up to him, closely followed by two other fillies. He sat up and rubbed the back of his neck.
"Uh, can I help you?" Sarge asked.
"You're right Applebloom, he does kinda talk like your sis." The white filly said.
"Woah, nice cutie mark." The orange pony with purple mane said.
Sarge cringed when she said cutie mark. He was really starting to hate that name.
"Thanks." Sarge grunted.
"He seems grumpy." The white filly said.
"He just doesn't like it when people call it a cutie mark." Applebloom said.
"Who are your friends?" Sarge asked.
"My name is Sweetie Belle." The white filly said.
"I'm Scootaloo." The orange one said.
"And together we're..." Applebloom started.
"The Cutie Mark Crusaders!" They all chanted in unison.
Sarge burst out with laughter and the girls looked at him.
"What's so funny?" Scootaloo asked.
"That is the stupidest name I have ever heard." Sarge said, wiping a tear out from his eye. "And I've heard Grif, so that is saying something."
Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo glared at him. "I thought you said Sarge was nice." Scootaloo whispered to Applebloom.
"Yeah, he seems like a big meanie to me." Sweetie Belle agreed.
"Sorry, no offense was meant." Sarge grunted.
"Well... at least he apologized." Sweetie Belle said.
"Well, you must be here for a reason." Sarge said. "What can I do for you?"
"Is it true how you got your cutie mark?" Scootaloo asked, kicking her back hooves into the air.
Sarge smiled at the orange filly, he liked her attitude. "You heard about that, huh?" Sarge chuckled.
"All of Ponyville is talking about it." Sweetie Belle added.
"Well, it's good to see I'm building a good reputation here." Sarge said.
"Yeah, that guy is so embarrassed that he hasn't left his house since you kicked him." Scootaloo said.
"Yeah, well, if he hadn't been an ass, that wouldn't have happened in the first place." Sarge said, leaning back on the tree.
"Anyways, we were just wonderin' if you could do us a favor." Applebloom said.
"Oh?" Sarge laughed. "And what would that be?"
"Well, we're always tryin' ta find ways to get our cutie marks..." Applebloom said. "But we never have any luck and always end up embarrassing ourselves..."
"So what does that have to do with me?" Sarge asked.
"You got your mark in no time so, well... we were just wondering if you could..." Sweetie Belle started.
"We're wondering if you could help us find our cutie marks." Scootaloo said simply.
Sarge looked at the girls who were staring at him intently. He let out a long sigh.
"I don't know..." Sarge said, to which the girls started frowning. "I guess I could give it a shot." The girls muzzles broke into huge grins. "On two conditions."
"That depends what they are." Scootaloo said.
"One: you let me join your little group." The girls huddled in a circle and started whispering. They all then broke off and nodded in unison. "And two: you never let Grif join the group." Sarge said with a smile, putting his hoof forward.
"Deal." The girls all said at once, all placing their hooves over his.
"Quit your bitching." Church said while his laughter subsided.
"Hey man, you would be shitting yourself too if you saw what I saw." Tucker said.
"It was a fucking dream." Church said. "Get over it."
"You're pretty helpful, you know that?" Tucker said sarcastically.
"Didn't you need to work there to get some money for something or other?" Church asked.
"Well, yeah." Tucker said.
"So you, rather than actually do shit, ran away because of a nightmare?" Church asked. "I thought you had no fears."
Tucker glared at Church and sighed. "Are you saying I overreacted?"
"No, I'm saying that you're a fucking idiot." Church said.
Spike then exited Twilight’s room, stretching his arms and yawning. He made his way to the top of the stairs and looked at the pair of arguing stallions. "What are you two yelling about?"
"Tucker over here had a bad dream." Church said.
"What was it about?" Spike asked.
"He said it was about Pinkie turning ponies into cupcakes." Church replied. "He had to go to Pinkie’s and help her do stuff but she said something and it sent him running."
"Pinkie turning ponies into cupcakes?" Spike said, scratching his head. "Sounds pretty scary."
"See?" Tucker yelled.
"I'll admit, it sounds fucked up." Church said. "But would you have ran away if presented by some semblance of a nightmare you had the night before?"
"Well, I would feel a bit nervous..." Spike started. "But I don't think I have ran. I may be small, but I'm no coward."
"I'm not a coward either." Tucker mumbled.
"Prove it." Church said. "Go back and help out and try not to pussy out this time."
"Fine." Tucker said.
Tucker slammed the door and started making his back to Sugarcube Corner.
"You would have run too, wouldn't you?" Church asked curiously.
"Yeah." Spike said. "Would you?"
"Probably." Church chuckled. "But Tucker is just too fun to piss off."
Tucker arrived at Sugarcube Corner after a couple minutes of walking. When he got there, he noticed that the door was ajar. He slowly walked in and looked around.
"Yo, anybody here?" Tucker called out.
Tucker got no answer so he sighed. He made his way around the counter and into the kitchen. He looked in the oven, where he saw a couple trays of cupcakes baking. Tucker then heard some muffled noise from his left, causing him to jump away, turning quickly, not sure what to expect. However, the room was empty. The sound appeared to come from a door that had been left slightly ajar.
"Caboose, you down there?" Tucker asked.
"Tucker, help me." Rainbow Dash called out in a strained voice.
Tucker ran down the stairs and looked around. Well, tried to look around, but the room was completely dark.
"Hello Tucker!" Caboose said happily.
"What the fuck do you think you're doing Caboose?" Tucker asked angrily.
"We're making cupcakes." Caboose said. "Would you like one?"
"No I wouldn't like one. Where are you?"
"Hang on a sec." Pinkie said.
The lights then turned on and Tucker slam his eyes shut for a second. He quickly opened them again and saw Pinkie standing on a step ladder with a light bulb in her hoof. He then looked down and saw Rainbow Dash wiping flour off her face.
"What happened?" Tucker asked, confused.
"Well, there was no room anywhere else so we came down here to finish up with the cupcakes." Pinkie said. "But when we came down the lights went pop."
"Oh." Tucker laughed.
"Where did you run to?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"I needed to talk to Church for a minute." Tucker said.
"Oh, I thought it had something to do with your bad dream." Rainbow Dash said.
"Pft, no, of course not." Tucker said with a weak laugh. "I may be a lot of things, but a coward I am not."
"Well you seemed pretty shaken up by it." Rainbow Dash said.
The oven upstairs then made a dinging noise.
"The last batch is done!" Pinkie said, running up the stairs.
After a couple seconds Pinkie then ran back down with a tray of freshly baked cupcakes.
"So Tucker, are you finally going to help or are you going to run off again?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Yeah I'll help." Tucker said, looking over the cupcakes. "How many did you guys make?
"Twelve dozen." Pinkie said, placing the tray down on the table. "Let's get crackin'!"
Tucker nodded and grabbed some icing and started sloppily lapping it onto the cupcakes.
"That's too much!" Pinkie said.
"Oh, okay." Tucker said, scraping most of the icing off.
"Now that's too little. Haven't you ever made cupcakes before?" Pinkie asked.
"No. I don't see what the big deal is about how much icing we put on." Tucker said.
"Well if you put too much on it's too sweet, and if you don't put on enough it doesn't taste sweet at all!" Pinkie said. "You need just the right amount to make them perfect."
"Of course." Tucker muttered, trying to put on the right amount of icing. "Y'know, this doesn't seem like a lot of work."
"That's because you left before we did the actual cooking." Rainbow Dash said.
"Hey, I told you I'm not a good cook." Tucker said. "Besides, it's not like we're cooking prime ribs here or anything..."
"What's a 'prime rib'?" Pinkie asked.
"You're kidding, right?" Pinkie shook her head. "Well, if it isn't one nightmare after another." Tucker muttered.
After a few more minutes of putting icing on the cupcakes, Pinkie collected them all and started to put them into a large box.
"Alright, so we're done?" Tucker asked.
"Yeah, you're done." Pinkie said. "Oh right, you need the bits for those tickets. Silly me. Stay right here."
Pinkie then ran up the stairs and grabbed a small envelope and gave it to Rainbow Dash.
"Thanks Pinkie." Rainbow Dash said. "Who ordered these anyways? Seems like a lot for one pony."
"I don't know." Pinkie said. Pinkie grabbed a piece of paper and looked at it. "It looks like its going to the Cloudasseum to be sold at a concession stand. What a coinkeydink. Maybe when you guys are there you'll end up having some!"
"I doubt it." Tucker said. "I don't think I'll ever eat a cupcake again."
Grif woke up to the sound of birds chirping happily. He yawned and sat up on the couch, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. Haley looked at him and tilted her head on its side.
"What are you looking at?" Grif asked more gruffly than he meant to.
Haley made a low, whining noise and lowered her head slightly.
"Sorry, you're probably just hungry." Grif said. "How about we go grab a bite to eat?"
Grif was about to head into the kitchen when a sharp pain shot through his leg. He grunted as he fell to the ground. Fluttershy walked into the room to investigate and saw Grif on the ground.
"Are you okay?" Fluttershy asked, running up to Grif.
"Yeah. I just fell over." Fluttershy stared at Grif and looked at his leg, mouth agape. In a moment, she let out a gasp of horror as her shock wore off. "What?" Grif asked.
"Y-your leg..." Fluttershy said quietly.
"What about it?" Grif looked down at his leg, which he noticed was turning green, the veins causing a webbing texture to appear. "What the fuck... What's wrong with it?"
"I-it's gr-green." Fluttershy peeped.
"Yeah, I noticed. But why is it green?" Grif asked.
"I'm not sure." Fluttershy said.
"I thought you fixed it all up." Grif said.
"I thought so too." Fluttershy said.
Grif stared at his wound once again and stepped on his hoof again, just to end up yelping with pain once again.
"Fuck that hurts." Grif muttered, shaking his hoof.
"Stay right here, I need to see something." Fluttershy said.
"I couldn't go anywhere if I wanted to." Grif chuckled, slowly placing his hoof on the ground.
Fluttershy went to check on a small medical book that she kept in her drawer. She opened up the book and flipped to the index and skimmed through it, trying to find any hints as to what could be wrong, or how to help it heal. After a few brief minutes of hastily looking for solutions, she gave up the search. She looked around worriedly and put the book back in it's place and went back to Grif.
"We need to go see Twilight." Fluttershy said.
"Why?" Grif asked. "It's just a small infection."
"You don't know if it is just small." Fluttershy said. "It could be serious."
"I'm sure it will be fine." Grif laughed, walking back to the couch.
Fluttershy stomped in front of him locked his eyes to hers and gave him the stare. Grif retracted slowly and sighed.
"Fine. Let's go." Grif muttered, then smiled. "Nice job being assertive by the way."
Fluttershy smiled and nodded gratefully. She walked next to him and placed his injured leg over her neck to prevent him from standing on his infected hoof. They then made their way to the library to seek Twilight’s aid.
Twilight had just woken up and made her way downstairs to where Church and Spike were rolling around, laughing hysterically.
"What's so funny?" Twilight asked.
"Just Tucker being an idiot." Church said.
"Oh? What did he do?" Twilight asked.
"He had a nightmare." Spike said.
"A nightmare?" Twilight asked. "What was it about?"
"It was about Caboose and Pinkie killing ponies and turning them into cupcakes." Church said.
Twilight stared at Church silently.
"That sounds horrifying." Twilight said.
"Yeah, you should have seen the look on his face when we made fun of him for it." Spike chuckled.
"You guys are terrible." Twilight said.
"Why are we terrible?" Church asked.
"Tucker had a horrifying experience, and you chastised him for it?" Twilight said.
"When you put it that way, I guess it sounds pretty bad." Spike said.
"That's because it is Spike. I thought you knew better than that." Twilight said.
"Sorry Twi, I didn't mean to make you mad at me." Spike said sadly.
"I'm not angry. I'm disappointed." Twilight said. Just then, there was a knock at the door. "If that is Tucker I want you two to apologize to him."
"Fine." Church and Spike said together.
Twilight opened the door to see a worried Fluttershy holding up a weak looking Grif.
"Fluttershy, what's wrong with Grif?" Twilight asked.
"I don't know." Fluttershy said. "I came here because I thought you would be able to help."
Twilight looked at Grif’s leg, which was covered in a strange substance.
"Church, Spike, you two look for my book of ailments and infections." Twilight said. "I'll look his wound over and see what I can find."
Church and Spike set off immediately and started looking for the book. Twilight made room on her table and she motioned Fluttershy to bring him over. Grif slowly climbed onto the table and laid down on it. Twilight gazed curiously at the wound. Upon closer inspection she noticed that this was by no means a regular infection. The green was not that of trapped bacteria, but that of moss.
"Found it." Spike said, grabbing a book off of the shelf.
"Hurry up and give it to me." Twilight said.
Spike hastily handed the book over to Twilight and she started to flip through it. It only took her a few seconds to find the right page, and when she found it she gasped inaudibly.
"What does it say?" Fluttershy said. "Is it bad?"
"It says that timberwolves have a secretion on their teeth. When a timberwolf bites you, the secretion gets into your bloodstream and continuously infects the pony. The infection is a slow and painful process that takes weeks to complete."
Fluttershy looked at Grif’s leg with a troubled expression.
"What else does it say?" Grif asked.
"It says that once the infection makes its way through the bloodstream it starts to take its effect." Twilight said. "It says that once the infection settles, it starts to turn the infected pony into a plant-like form. The pony then becomes tired and suffers through excruciating pain in the infected area as it gets covered in moss or bark. Over the course of a couple weeks, the pony soon loses mobility and the ability to eat, and then the infected pony dies."
Fluttershy started to shake slowly and looked at the book Twilight was holding.
"Fuck." Grif muttered. "I don't like the idea of dying."
"What's the cure?" Fluttershy asked quietly.
"It says that no cure has ever been found." Twilight said sadly.
Fluttershy looked at Grif with a great feeling of regret and she hugged him tightly.
"I'm so sorry Grif. This is all my fault." Fluttershy said, tears welling up in her eyes. "If I hadn't left you alone with the bunnies none of this would have happened." Fluttershy looked at the floor sadly. Grif stared at her finding himself saddened by the sight.
"Hey, don't feel bad Fluttershy." Grif said, putting his hoof on her to comfort her. "It is mostly my fault anyways."
"Why is that?" Twilight asked.
"I did say I wanted to be a tree." Grif said weakly with a humorless chuckle. "Seems like I'm getting that wish granted."
"This isn't a joke Grif." Church said.
"I thought it was pretty funny." Grif muttered. "Just trying to make light of the situation."
"How can you not be worried?" Twilight asked.
Grif shrugged and sat up on the table. He then jumped off and pain shot through his hoof again.
"Okay maybe I'm a bit worried." Grif said, grinding his teeth together in pain. "But Church, you know that I have lived through a lot worse."
"I know you can take a beating. I remember that time with Tex when she-"
"Yeah." Grif said, placing his hooves instinctively over his crotch at the mention of Tex. "I remember, and I am in no hurry to revisit that."
Church couldn't help but let out a wry smile.
"Anyways, you can take a beating, but each of those times nobody actually tried to kill you." Church said. "They just tried to harm you."
Grif looked over at Church and raised his brow.
"Okay, so maybe Sarge has tried to kill you a couple times." Church said. "But I don't think he really wants you dead."
"What would make you think that?" Grif asked.
"Remember that time that Tucker almost killed you with Sheila?" Church asked.
"Tucker tried to kill Grif?" Twilight asked, appalled at the thought.
"Sarge took Simmons organs and put them into you." Church said, ignoring Twilight’s question. "And when you went into the forest Sarge didn’t accept the idea that you could be dead."
"Really?" Grif asked.
"Yeah, well. He kind of said that he would be the one to kill you. But the thought is still there."
"How inspiring." Grif muttered sarcastically, but did not hide his smile.
"But now it isn't just a beating you're in for." Church said, getting back on topic. "You've been told that odds are that you will die."
"Now I'm less worried." Grif said.
"How?" Fluttershy asked.
"Because I know that Sarge will get me before this shit does." Grif said, motioning to his infected hoof. "And Twilight said there was no cure. I've never been the one to volunteer for fighting, and I'm not going to fight something that is out of my hands- er, hooves."
Twilight stared at Grif, and looked back at the book. "The book said no cure has been found, that doesn't mean there isn’t one." Twilight said.
The others looked at her with questioning gazes. "What are you saying?" Grif asked.
"I'm saying that we shouldn't give up hope just yet." Twilight said. "I say we look for something to help you."
"But giving up hope is the only thing I'm good at." Grif said.
"What about that zebra, Zecora?" Church suggested. "She lives in that forest, so wouldn't she know more about the kind of stuff that goes on in it?"
"That would probably be the best place to start." Twilight agreed, nodding her head. "Fluttershy, you stay here with Grif, we'll go get the others to help us."
"Okay." Fluttershy said.
"Come on Spike, you're coming too." Twilight said.
"What? Why me?" Spike asked.
"Because you're going to apologize to Tucker."
Spike groaned, but did not hesitate to jump on to Twilight’s back.
"We'll be back soon." Twilight said, opening the door and walking out.
Fluttershy nodded slowly and sat down next to Grif. Church gave a half-hearted wave to the pair and made his way out the door, shutting it behind him. Fluttershy kept staring at the infection, blaming herself for what is happening.
"You really need to stop blaming yourself." Grif said.
"I can't help it." Fluttershy said weakly, hugging Grif once again. "You are going to die and it's all my fault."
"How about a bet?" Grif asked.
"What kind of bet?" Fluttershy asked, wiping a tear from her eye.
"When I make it through this." Grif said. "Not if. When I make it through this, you spend a day in my shoes."
"What do you mean?" Fluttershy asked.
"Take a day off. Sleep, rest, whatever. Just stop worrying about every little detail." Grif then raised his good hoof and smiled weakly. "Deal?"
"Deal." Fluttershy said, shaking his hoof, matching Grif’s weak smile.
Twilight’s first stop was Sugarcube Corner, catching Rainbow Dash and Tucker as they were leaving. They quickly ran the situation by them as they grabbed Pinkie and Caboose. The group then made their way to the Carousel Boutique, where they found Rarity beginning her work on Simmons’ suit. Although they didn't fully explain what was going on, they knew that it seemed serious. The group then made their final stop at Sweet Apple Acres, where Sarge was cavorting about with the Cutie Mark Crusaders.
"What's going on?" Sarge asked as the group walked up.
"Grif is in trouble." Church said.
"Anything out of the ordinary?" Sarge asked.
"It turns out that the timberwolf attack had more of an affect on Grif than we thought." Twilight said.
"What do you mean?" Sarge asked.
"He has been infected by the timberwolves, and if we don't find out what's wrong he could..." Church said, trailing off. "Who are the little ones?"
"Oh, right." Sarge grunted. "Listen, why don't you girls come and see me later. This might be a little bit out of your league."
"Nothing is out of our league." Scootaloo said happily.
"Trust me. This is." Sarge said.
The Cutie Mark Crusaders hesitantly nodded and made their way away from the group. Sarge nodded at Church to continue.
"Anyways, the infection is painfully making its way through Grif’s body. If we don't do anything soon, Grif will be... seriously injured."
"Hrm. If I exert zero energy, I get exactly what I've always wanted..." Sarge said with a laugh. "Yeah blue, that's a hell of a compelling argument on your part, bravo."
"We're serious." Twilight said. "Grif could die, don't you care?"
"Yeah, yeah." Sarge grunted. "Wait here, I'll go get Applejack..."
"Don't mind him." Simmons said, "Sarge just doesn't want anybody to know that he will be the one to take Grif out before anyone else."
Everypony soon arrived back at Twilight’s place, where Grif was starting to doze off on the table.
"Hey, what took you guys so long?" Grif asked.
"Well I heard you were in pain, so naturally I hesitated as long as I could before coming here." Sarge said.
"Gee, thanks Sarge." Grif said, swinging his back hooves off the edge of the table.
Sarge looked at Grif’s infected leg seriously, slowly examining it. Before Grif asked what he was doing, Sarge promptly punched the infected area which caused Grif to fall back in pain.
"What the fuck was that for?" Grif yelled.
"I was just making sure you weren't faking it." Sarge said.
"Well at least now you know." Grif muttered.
"I don't know, that didn't seem genuine to me." Sarge said.
"Don't hit him." Fluttershy said quietly, placing herself between Sarge and Grif. Sarge just kept staring at Fluttershy, seemingly looking right through her. He then grunted and started towards the door.
"Let's just get this show on the road." Sarge said.
Church walked up to Grif and helped Fluttershy hoist Grif up. Grif nodded gratefully and started to make his way forward.
"I think I can do this by myself." Fluttershy said.
"You sure?" Church asked. Fluttershy nodded so Church let Grif’s other leg down.
"Hurry it up ladies." Sarge called from outside. "I want to make it there before Grif dies."
"You are a true leader of the people Sarge." Simmons said.
"Hey Simmons..." Grif said.
"What Grif?"
"When did you get your mark?" Grif asked.
Simmons walked behind Rarity, breaking Grif’s view of him as he responded, "Oh, I got it at Rarity’s Boutique."
"For what, sewing?" Grif asked, chuckling lightheartedly.
"Of course not." Simmons said, laughing weakly. "That would be totally womanly."
Sarge, confounded by the delays, walked back into the room and saw Simmons as he retreated around Rarity.
"Hey Simmons, did you get your mark for sewing?" Sarge said.
"Fuck." Simmons grunted, then looked to Sarge. "Yeah, I guess I did." Grif doubled over with laughter. He would have fallen had it not been for Fluttershy holding him up. "Fuck you Grif. It's no better than yours. How about you Sarge? You going to yell at me for feminizing the team?"
"Not at all." Sarge said. "I think it suits you just fine."
"Oh, ha ha Sarge." Simmons said sarcastically.
"I mean it." Sarge said. "You always had an eye for details. Almost half of the plans I came up with you would point out their flaws."
"Bullshit, if you told Simmons to jump, he would jump, then get on his knees and promise to jump higher next time." Grif said.
"Screw you Grif." Simmons muttered sourly.
"Well, he may not have spoken out, but I'm sure he saw the flaws in my plans, as few as there were." Sarge said.
"That's because your plans didn't have flaws, they were flaws thus eliminating the possibility of finding multiple flaws in each plan." Simmons said. "And it wasn't half the plans, it was basically all of them."
"See? Even now you still recall the flaws." Sarge said. "I would be surprised if that wasn't your special talent."
"Oh, well thanks Sarge." Simmons said happily. "Let's go, we don't want Grif to die now, do we?"
Simmons promptly turned and walked out the door with Rarity. Grif, with the aid of Fluttershy, walked over to Sarge. Grif leaned over to Sarge, "We're still going to rip on him later for being a woman, right?"
"Son, we're the red team." Sarge said. "Did you really even need to ask that?"
"Glad to hear it." Grif said.
The group soon found themselves at the edge of the Everfree Forest. For a few minutes they just stood there, staring into it trying to discern any dangers that might be lurking as soon as they entered.
"So, uh, should we get going?" Grif asked. "Not that I'm against standing around doing nothing."
"Hold on." Applejack said, scouring a bag she had strapped to her side.
"What are you doing?" Twilight asked.
"Jus' checkin' t' make sure I have my supplies in order." After a few brief moments Applejack stopped. "Alright let's go."
Applejack then started to make her way into the forest. The others quickly followed her lead, trying to hold a steady pace. From behind a bush, a small filly’s head poked out.
"Why are they going in there?" Scootaloo asked.
"Ah don't know." Applebloom said. "It was hard t' hear 'em from so far away."
"I think it had something to do with that Grif guy." Sweetie Belle said.
"What makes you say that?" Scootaloo asked.
"Well, at the farm the blue stallion mentioned Grif’s name." Sweetie Belle said. "And Fluttershy seemed to be carrying him."
After a couple seconds of silence, one of the crusaders spoke again. "So should we follow them?" Scootaloo asked.
"I don't know Scoots." Applebloom said. "I told mah sis I would never go back in there 'less I was bein' accompanied by an adult."
"What do you think Sweetie Belle?" Scootaloo asked. "Are you too scared to go in?"
"I din't say I was scared." Applebloom protested. "I said that we'd be safer with an adult."
"Being an adult is the whole point Applebloom." Scootaloo said. "Sarge said he would help us. What if he needs our help and we don't go and lose a chance on getting our cutie marks."
"That's true. He did say he would help us." Sweetie Belle said, thinking for a brief moment. "I think we should follow them."
"So are you in Applebloom, or are you a chicken?" Scootaloo asked.
"Am not! You're the chicken!" Applebloom said.
"Prove it." Scootaloo said. "Let's go in and trail them."
Applebloom looked into the forest and felt like she was being watched by something from within.
"Fine." Applebloom said, putting on a thin veil of courage. "Let's just hurry up an' try t' keep outta harm’s way." The Cutie Mark Crusaders then hastily followed the group's tracks, deep into the Everfree Forest.
"They're watching us." Grif muttered quietly, slowly following the others with Fluttershy.
"What do you mean?" Twilight asked.
"The wood wolves." Grif said. "They're looking at me." Grif’s head was on a swivel, instantly following every sound. In the nearby underbrush, he could make out faint movements of timberwolves. Stalking, watching, waiting, Grif didn't know what they were doing. All he knew is that they were there. The others looked over to where he was looking but could not see anything out of place.
"Is being paranoid one of the symptoms?" Sarge asked sarcasticaly.
"I don't think so." Twilight said. "The book never mentioned-"
The group then heard a branch snap from the bushes and everypony looked over worriedly at it.
"Now who is the paranoid one?" Grif asked, chuckling to himself.
"We should pick up the pace." Sarge said, starting to move a bit faster. "I don't want to get what Grif has."
"Well I can't exactly run on this leg you know." Grif said.
"You want to be dog food?" Sarge asked.
Grif muttered incomprehensibly and tried to move a bit faster. A couple of steps later, Grif tripped over a tree branch and grunted. "For the love of-" he said as he froze in place. As everyone else followed his gaze, they saw the timberwolves closing in, slowly creeping up on them from behind. Sarge walked next to Grif and picked him up.
"What should we do?" Tucker asked quietly.
"The same thing blues do best." Sarge muttered, then turned and started to sprint, carrying Grif on his back. "Run!"
The others didn't hesitate to turn tail at Sarge’s order. The others did not look back... except for Grif. He watched curiously as rather than chase them, the timberwolves splintered off back in to the woods. But he wasn't about to let Sarge drop him on his ass, so he smiled smugly and decided to let Sarge carry him down the trail. As they arrived at Zecora’s house they all stopped and looked back, expecting the timberwolves to be right on their fetlocks.
"Where did they go?" Simmons asked.
"I don't know." Church said. "But I don't exactly want to stick around and wait for them."
"Church is right, let's hurry up inside, we may have just temporarily lost them." Twilight said, walking up to the door.
As Twilight lifted her hoof to the door it suddenly swung open, causing Twilight to lose balance and fall forward. Church quickly caught her before she fell.
"Be a little more careful, hm?" Church said.
"Thanks." Twilight said quietly.
"Well if it isn't my acquaintances and friends from in town..." Zecora said happily, then noticed Fluttershy looking at Grif worriedly. "What could be so wrong my dear that it would make you frown?"
"Zecora, the bites that Grif got from the timberwolves were more severe than we thought." Twilight said.
Zecora looked at Grif and saw his infected leg and nodded quickly.
"Bring him so I may examine why his leg is so green." Zecora said. "there must have been something I must not have seen."
Sarge brought Grif in and put him on the rug. Zecora went to one of her books, opened it up and skimmed the pages quickly. She settled on one page, gave it a once-over and placed it on the table. She then grabbed another book and started to cross-reference them. She closed her eyes as she collected her thoughts. She suddenly closed the books and ran up to her brewing cauldron and lit a fire underneath. She started to take out samples of plants and herbs, examining each one closely. She selected a few and threw them in a mortar and pestle and started to grind them in to a fine powder.
"And good news doc?" Grif said.
"That depends on one thing." Zecora said.
"Oh? And what would that be?"
"I am missing some ingredients that I need the others to bring." Zecora said.
"I'm not exactly one for picking flowers." Sarge said.
"For the potion I have all the flowers I require." Zecora said. "What I need may be a bit more dangerous to acquire."
"How dangerous are we talking?" Church asked.
"There are three main ingredients that I still need." Zecora said. "But to find them, you must have courage and speed."
"We have that." Tucker said smugly.
"What are the ingredients?" Simmons asked.
"The first ingredient which I need is located on a great oak, for when it is burned it provides a soothing smoke."
"Great oaks are the oldest kind of trees in Equestria." Twilight explained. "They are located in areas that are uninhabitable for ponies, but are often homes to many other creatures.
"Tree bark. Got it." Sarge said. "What else?"
"The second ingredient is a cockatrice scale, the most potent of ones are those on it's tail."
"Hey Grif, there's your good news." Sarge said. "It looks like you aren't the only one who makes creatures up."
"Cockatrices are real." Twilight said. "They are monsters that look like a mix of a chicken and a snake."
"They don't sound dangerous." Simmons said.
"They may not sound like it, but when they gaze in to your eyes they have the ability to turn you in to stone." Twilight said.
"Okay, we got tree bark and a cockathingy scale." Sarge said. "What's the third ingredient?"
"The third and most vital ingredient is the most dangerous of all." Zecora said. "This one you have a great chance of being mauled."
"Yeah, yeah we got the dangerous part already." Sarge grunted impatiently. "What is the damn thing?"
"It is that of which Grif received when he was bit." Zecora said "You need to retrieve a sample of timberwolf spit."
"Okay." Sarge grunted. "So we need some tree bark, a scale and some spit?"
"That's not exactly sugar, spice, and everything nice." Church said.
"Why am I not surprised that Grif just doomed us to certain death?" Simmons asked.
"You know me Simmons." Grif said with a weak smile. "I always like to mix things up a little. Don't want you to go softer than you already are, now do we?"
"Okay, we should split up." Twilight said. "It will make this easier if we all split up to look for it.”
"Makes sense." Church said.
"Who will do what though?" Tucker said. "I don't think I want to fight those fucking wolves."
"I'll deal with the wolves." Sarge grunted.
"I think we should look for the bark." Church said to Twilight.
"Why do you get to do that?" Tucker said. "I want to do the easy shit."
"Because Twilight will be able to recognize what it looks like." Church said. "Caboose, Pinkie, you're coming too."
"Yay!" Caboose said happily. "I like trees!"
"So that leaves Rarity, Simmons, Rainbow Dash and Tucker to get the cockatrice scale." Twilight said.
"There is only one kind of way I would ever think of getting stoned, and being turned into stone is not that way." Tucker said.
"What's the matter blue? Are you scared?" Sarge said, cooing softly.
Tucker glared at Sarge, but Sarge just laughed at him.
"You have nothing to complain about, I'm the one taking the bigger risk." Sarge said.
"Whatever." Tucker said.
"Stop complaining." Rainbow Dash said. "Let's make this quick, I don't want to be so tired I fall asleep during the Wonderbolts show."
"Where are we going to find this lizard-hen thing anyways?" Tucker asked. "I'll show you all that I can kick their scaled asses."
"Not too far south from here is a cockatrice cave." Zecora said. "But when you see them, you may not be so brave."
"As much as I like taking attendance, which is to say not very much, I would like it if you guys would go soon." Grif said. "I can feel this shit spreading, and it does not feel great."
"Spike, you stay with Fluttershy and Zecora." Twilight said.
"But Twilight-" Spike started to protest.
"No buts." Twilight said. "You still haven't even done what you came here to do yet."
"Oh, right." Spike said, turning to Tucker. "Hey Tucker. I'm really sorry for what I said."
"Don't worry about it." Tucker grunted, walking out the door.
"Is that good enough?" Spike asked.
Boys will be boys. Twilight thought to herself as she rolled her eyes at Spike.
"Come on, I know where the great oaks are and if we hurry now we should be able to make it there in a matter of minutes." Twilight said.
"Alright." Church said, turning himself to face Caboose and Pinkie. "Come on you two."
"Okay Mr. Church!" Pinkie said, hopping out the door.
Everypony was making their way out the door. Except Sarge, who stood in front of Applejack, blocking her from going out.
"What’re ya doin Sarge? Move outta the way." Applejack said.
"Can't let you go." Sarge said.
"What are ya talkin' about? You can't do this alone." Applejack said.
"You have family to look after." Sarge grunted. "It would be best if you stayed here."
"You need my help." Applejack protested.
Sarge stared at her for a few seconds then begrudgingly stepped back and grunted.
"Okay, just stay behind me." Sarge said. "I don't want to be the one to tell the little one what happened to her sister."
"If anyone gets hurt, it'll be you." Applejack snorted, making her way past Sarge.
"Hey, uh, Sarge?" Grif said.
"What?" Sarge asked.
"Thanks." Grif said.
"Don't think I'm doing this for you." Sarge said with a smile, walking out the door.
Soon all the ponies were standing outside of the hut, staring around the forest, trying to find any immediate dangers.
"Alright." Church said. "Which way is what?"
"Well to the south of here is the cave that Rainbow Dash and the others need to get to." Twilight said. "The trees where we are going are located north-east of here, and that should take us just a couple of minutes."
"And where should we look for the wolves?" Sarge asked.
"I don't know." Twilight said. "Timberwolves are always on the move, and only stop to rest briefly in the morning to sleep."
"I think you should start with the trail that we came in on." Church said. "It would probably be easier to look for signs of them there."
"Good thinking Church." Twilight said.
"Let's see which group can get their ingredients first." Rainbow Dash said, zooming in to the air.
"Rainbow Dash, this is not a game." Rarity said.
"Spoilsport." Rainbow Dash pouted, landing back on to the ground.
"Let's go, we're wasting time standing around." Sarge said, starting down the path.
"Okay. Be careful everypony." Twilight said.
Back inside Zecora’s hut, Fluttershy was looking out the window watching the others leave. Grif looked at Fluttershy and grunted.
"Do you think they'll be okay?" Fluttershy asked.
"I've known these guys for years, and if I had to place money on it... I'd say that I'm as good as dead. Good thing I’m not placing money on it." Grif said with a chuckle
"That's very pessimistic." Spike said.
"I'm just being a realist." Grif said, lying back down on the rug. "Might as well get comfortable, it'll take them a while to get back."
"Good thinking." Spike said, taking a seat on the ground.
Fluttershy went up to Grif and sat down beside him. "Hey." Grif muttered.
Fluttershy said nothing but continued to stare at Grif’s leg. Grif sighed deeply and put his hoof on her to comfort her. "Listen, I'm sure they will be perfectly fine with gathering the ingredients." Grif said. "You just have to stop blaming yourself and worrying about me. Everything will be fine."
"Okay." Fluttershy said quietly.
Zecora made her way back to the brewing stand and started crushing more ingredients, tossing them into the mixture when it was necessary. Fluttershy slowly walked up to Zecora and watched her stir it.
"Is there anything I can do to help?" Fluttershy asked.
Zecora glanced at Fluttershy and nodded quickly.
"Yes you can. Keep mixing this, do not slow down." Zecora said. "You will know to stop when the mixture turns brown."
"Okay." Fluttershy said.
Fluttershy grabbed the wooden stick, mixing at the same pace as Zecora was. Zecora walked up to the potion book and opened it once again, flipping through the pages to make sure she had not missed anything.
Twilight and Church were walking in silence, focusing on the surrounding area. Pinkie was humming a tune that Caboose was rather enjoying, so he joined in. However, Caboose was humming the song completely off-tune and Pinkie thought he had been humming his own song, so she started to hum what he was humming.
"What song is this?" Pinkie asked after a couple minutes.
"I thought you knew!" Caboose exclaimed.
Pinkie and Caboose then started to giggle. Church glared over at the pair who were making a racket. "Be quiet. We don't want to bring any attention to ourselves." Church snapped.
"Okay Church." Caboose said sadly. "Are we there yet?"
"No Caboose." Twilight said. "It should only be another minute or two at the most."
"Oh, okay." Caboose said.
"Are we there yet now?" Pinkie asked immediately after.
For fuck's sake Church thought to himself, not sure if Pinkie had asked to spite them, or simply because she was Pinkie Pie.
"No Pinkie, we aren't there yet." Twilight said.
The group then fell in to silence for another minute.
"How about now?" Caboose asked.
"Caboose, please just shut the fuck up." Church said. Caboose did not reply to Church’s outburst. He just nodded and put his head down, slowly following the others. It took them less than two minutes after that to get to their destination, where they found many oversized trees, trunks all a very dark brown.
"So these are them I assume?" Church asked.
"Yes." Twilight replied simply.
"This place is covered in mud!" Caboose said.
"You are a certified genius Caboose." Church said sarcastically.
"Thanks Church." Caboose said happily.
"Let's try and find the darkest tree and get a sample of that." Twilight said.
"Why not just use any tree?" Church asked.
"Unlike most trees, these trees get darker with age." Twilight explained. "And the trees properties grow stronger and wield much more potency with age." Church gave a quick nod to show that he understood, and started to look for the darkest tree he could find. It took him less than a minute to find a tree that almost seemed to be black. Twilight walked up to the tree and her horn started to glow. She looked back at Church and nodded.
"I can feel the power in this one." Twilight said.
"Alright, how are we going to get a piece of it." Church asked.
"Well, these trees are immune to magic so that is out of the question." Twilight said.
"How nice." Church said. "Maybe we should have come up with a plan before coming in here."
"I have an idea." Pinkie said happily.
"Really? I would love to hear it." Church said.
Pinkie nodded and poked Caboose in the side.
"Caboose, did you know that these trees taste like double chocolate cupcakes?" Pinkie asked.
"Really?!" Caboose yelled.
Caboose ran up to the near black tree and chomped it, shattering a large section of it. He chewed it for a couple seconds before spitting it out and scrubbing his tongue.
"That doesn't taste like chocolate at all." Caboose said.
Pinkie smiled and reached into her hair and pulled out a wrapped chocolate bar and threw it at Caboose.
"Thank you!" Caboose said happily, throwing the bar in his mouth, wrapper and all.
"Nice going Pinkie." Church said, giving a curt nod of approval.
"Thanks." Pinkie said.
Twilight walked up to the two largest pieces of wood she could find and put them in a small bag she had.
"This should be good enough. I won't be able to use magic as I carry them though." Twilight said. "Now we just need to get back to Zecora’s place and-" Before Twilight could finish, a deafening roar filled area. Everypony looked around nervously, trying to locate the source of the noise.
"What the fuck was that?" Church asked.
"I don't know, but that screech sounded familiar." Twilight said.
As Twilight said that the sound of a tree snapping down and slamming into the mud came from their left. Then another.
"What should we do?" Twilight asked.
"I was going to suggest we run." Church said.
A semi-rotted tree then shot in to the air from thirty meters away and was headed straight for them. Church’s horn started to glow as he deflected the tree to the side. When the tree slammed in to the ground, a large creature suddenly came into view through the trees, charging straight for them.
"Hydra!" Twilight yelled, running back towards Zecora’s.
"There are five of them!" Caboose yelled, sprinting with Pinkie next to Twilight.
"No, Hydras are creatures that have multiple heads." Twilight said. "When one gets severed it grows two more in its place."
"Shut up and keep running." Church yelled. "We don't need to waste our breath." As Church said that, one of the hydra's heads lunged forward and grabbed for Church. Church saw it coming and rolled out of the way. Church grunted as his head hit the ground, but he got up and soon caught up with the others, but they were all stopped.
"Why did you stop running?" Church yelled.
"There is nowhere to run to." Twilight said simply. "We're trapped."
The trees that surrounded them were so close together that it would be impossible to go in between them. The hydra then burst through the trees and stood still, blocking the only path out.
"I don't want to die." Church said. "Wait a minute. I can't die, why am I scared?"
"Because you can feel pain?" Twilight said quietly.
"Shit. I forgot about that." Church muttered.
The hydra then screeched and it's heads lunged towards all of them. A dark green ball appeared between the group of ponies and the hydra. The ball then exploded outward, surging towards the hydra, enveloping it in a green embrace.
"I thought you said you couldn't use magic." Church yelled.
"I thought that was you." Twilight said, confused and intrigued by what was happening.
The hydra stumbled around, trying to break free of the magic. Suddenly the spell changed colors to blue and the hydra stopped moving, a cold mist coming off of it's body.
"I-it froze?" Twilight asked. "Why is it frozen?"
"I don't know, but I say we take advantage of this and run." Church said. "I don't want to be here when the spell wears off."
"Good idea." Twilight said as the group ran past the frozen hydra and headed back to Zecora’s place.
"Where the hell is this cave?" Simmons asked.
"Just keep following the path." Tucker said.
"I can barely fucking see it." Simmons muttered.
"Stop whining you baby. It's not helping us get there any faster." Rainbow Dash said.
"I'm not whining. I'm complaining." Simmons said. "They are two completely different things."
"Well said Simmons,” Rarity said before turning to Rainbow Dash, “if you are going to yell at him, at least get your facts straight."
"Thank you Rarity." Simmons said as recognition flickered across his face. "Wait a second... hey!"
"Sorry, I didn't mean it that way." Rarity said sincerely.
"Let's just go, I want to get this over with." Tucker said.
After a few more minutes of walking, they came to a large opening in the side of a mountain. There was a wooden sign with an X carved on it, and standing next to it was a statue of a bear cub.
"I can't say much for the decor." Rarity said.
"I don't think that's decor." Simmons said quietly.
"What do you..." Rarity started.
Suddenly Rarity’s eyes went wide when she remembered what cockatrices do, and she looked over at the trapped cub and frowned. "Poor thing. We should find a way to help him."
"I don't think there is much we can do." Simmons said quietly. "Let's just grab the scale and hurry back."
Rarity nodded slowly but continued looking at the trapped creature. The group quietly made their way in to the cave, slowly walking into blindness.
"Stand still for a second." Rarity whispered.
"What is it?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Shh." Rarity said as she focused. Rarity’s horn then burst into dazzling light and everypony shut their eyes.
"What are you doing?" Tucker hissed. "Trying to blind us?"
"Quite the opposite." Rarity said.
Everypony then opened their eyes to see that the cave was as bright as day. "Good thinking." Simmons said.
"I try." Rarity said modestly.
The group then continued further into the cave, trying to find any hints of a cockatrice. Tucker was walking ahead of them when he suddenly backed up against the wall, motioning his hoof to follow his lead.
"What's wrong?" Rainbow Dash asked quietly. "Is one in there?"
"No." Tucker replied. "More like fifty."
"What are we going to do?" Simmons whispered.
"I don't know." Tucker said. "Should we just run in and snatch one?"
"That does not sound like the best of plans." Rarity said.
Tucker muttered something under his breath and peaked around the corner.
"I think they're sleeping." Tucker said.
"Well at least there is some good news." Simmons said.
"I say we do Tucker’s plan." Rainbow Dash said. "Slowly go in, snag one, and then run."
"I'll do it." Tucker said quickly.
"Be careful."
"Careful is my middle name." Tucker said jokingly as he started walking towards the group of cockatrices and spotted one that was not sleeping near the others. Its body slithered slightly and Tucker froze. After a couple of seconds he continued towards the sleeping creature. "Where the fuck is its tail?" Tucker muttered quietly to himself.
Tucker slowly walked over it, looking for its tail. After a brief time he found it, but he realized that it was tucked under its body. Tucker groaned, decided that it wasn’t worth it, and started towards one of the ones that was closer to the others. Rainbow Dash decided to go and help Tucker when she saw that he was headed towards the larger group. As she started into the room, she stumbled, ending up right in front of the lone cockatrice. She had too much momentum, and not enough time to take off, as she bumped right into the sleeping chicken-snake. The cockatrice screeched after being awoken so abruptly by this intrusion. It then slithered up, balancing on its tail, continuing the screeching noise.
"Fuck." Tucker exclaimed.
The cockatrices that had been all clumped together all awoke at this, adding their own screeches to the mix, filling the cave with deafening volume, disorienting Rainbow Dash and Tucker. Fortunately, the group of cockatrices were more interested in their sleep, simply slithering deeper into the cave instead of worrying about the intruders. The lone one remained however, eyes scanning for what had woken it. Spotting the still-stunned Rainbow Dash, it quickly slithered over and constricted her with its snake-like body.
"Help!" Rainbow Dash managed, the sound hoarse from the lack of air in her lungs.
Simmons horn started to glow as he quickly took action to try and help Rainbow Dash, but he wandered too close to the cockatrice and its prey. He was rewarded with a powerful swat of the cockatrice’s tail, sending him flying into a wall and drooping down as he lost consciousness.
"Rarity. Do something." Rainbow Dash wheezed.
"I can't. If I stop to use a different spell we will be blinded." Rarity yelled.
The cockatrice then tightened its grip, giving its head enough room lock its gaze with Rainbow Dash’s terrified eyes. Rainbow Dash yelped as she felt her hooves turning into stone. Tucker took action immediately, taking off like a shot. He collided heavily with the cockatrice, causing it to release Rainbow Dash as it flew into the wall of the cave.
"Come after me you fucking asshole." Tucker yelled.
The cockatrice quickly responded to its new attacker, tackling Tucker to the ground and wrapping its tail around his neck. The cockatrice then gazed in to Tucker's eyes and Tucker’s legs began the stony transformation that he had just witnessed occurring to Rainbow Dash. Tucker started to yell in pain, but his voice was crackling. The crackle was not of that of pain or of bones breaking, but that of electricity. The cockatrice’s attention broke from Tucker’s eyes and down to his front hooves, where sparks was appearing.
"What are you doing?" Rainbow Dash yelled.
Tucker looked back at Rainbow Dash and Rarity who were standing there with horrified expressions.
"Run." Tucker said quietly.
"We're not leaving without you." Rainbow Dash yelled.
Tucker shook his head and the electricity surged to his wings and he shot across the cavern, dragging the cockatrice with him.
"Tucker!" Rainbow Dash yelled, flying after him.
Tucker and the cockatrice slammed into the wall which stunned the cockatrice, forcing it to release Tucker. Tucker flew in to the air, collecting his own surroundings and observing the stunned cockatrice. Once the cockatrice regained its senses, it screeched at Tucker and barrelled towards him. Tucker concentrated on the electrical sensation that was coursing through him and forced the current back to his hooves. Suddenly the electricity surged outwards on either side of his hoof, forming a two-pronged blade of crackling energy.
"Now this is interesting." Tucker grunted.
Rainbow Dash charged in, still worried about Tucker and the energy that was was crackling from his body. Her jaw dropped as she saw the energy blade emerge from Tucker’s hoof. Tucker had no time to admire his new weapon however. He flew to the side, dodging the charging cockatrice. As it passed him he sliced downwards, severing the cockatrice’s tail.
"Swish!" Tucker yelled.
The cockatrices that had retreated heard their injured friend and started flooding back into the chamber where they were sitting. Tucker grabbed the severed tail and looked at Rainbow Dash.
"Run!" Tucker yelled.
Rainbow Dash nodded and they took off back towards the entrance of the cave. As Rarity saw them coming and took off as well. Tucker grabbed Simmons on his way by and shot out of the cave, lightning crackling out from his back hooves and wings. They saw the rear end of a bear cub quickly retreating into the underbrush of the forest. “I’m glad that we could save the poor thing.” Rarity said at the sight.
The group quickly made their way back to Zecora’s place. Rarity opened the door, allowing the exhausted forms of Rainbow Dash and Tucker to go in first. Tucker put Simmons on the ground and promptly collapsed onto the ground himself, his legs giving out as the adrenaline flowed out of his system.
"That... was awesome." Rainbow Dash panted.
"Yeah, it was... wasn't it?" Tucker said, smiling weakly. "Now I just have to find out how the fuck I did it."
"Do you have the scales?" Grif asked.
Tucker looked over at Grif and tossed the severed tail at him. Grif caught it and looked at it, then back to Tucker.
"Nice going." Grif said. "But couldn't you have made it back here faster?"
The Cutie Mark Crusaders slowly and cautiously walked down the rough trail, eyes darting every which-way whenever they heard a noise. "This was a bad idea." Sweetie Belle said quietly.
"Well it's too late to turn back now." Scootaloo said.
"What was that?" Applebloom said, jumping to the side.
"What was what?" Sweetie Belle asked.
"The bush... i-it moved." Applebloom said.
"I didn't see anything." Sweetie Belle said.
"Applebloom is just looking for a reason to turn back." Scootaloo said with a small, nervous laugh.
Sweetie Belle looked over at the bush and yelped, taking a few steps back. "No she's not."
"What are you to talking about?" Scootaloo asked, turning to the bush that Applebloom and Sweetie Belle were watching to see a pair of yellow eyes shining brilliantly from within it. "What is that thing?" Scootaloo asked quietly.
"I think it's one of them timberwolf thingies Granny Smith talked about durin' family appreciation day." Applebloom said.
The glow of the eyes then suddenly disappeared. The girls kept staring at the bush for what seemed like an eternity.
"Where did it go?" Sweetie Belle asked.
"I don't know, but I think we should keep going." Scootaloo said.
Scootaloo then turned down the path, just to find herself face-to-face with a timberwolf, eyeing her curiously. The girls barely managed to stifle their screams as the timberwolf circled them slowly. After a few seconds the timberwolf suddenly stopped and started to growl. The girls’ bodies were all frozen in intense fear, but their eyes continued darting around the forest as they continued to hear more noise coming from the dark forest. Another timberwolf jumped out of the bush. Then a third. And then a fourth.
"What are we going to do?" Sweetie Belle asked.
"I d-don't know..." Scootaloo squeaked.
Sarge and Applejack were back-tracking down the trail, looking for where the timberwolves had lost interest in them. Applejack kept trying to talk to Sarge, but whenever she tried to start a conversation, he would just grunt and keep going. It was beginning to worry her. "Y'know Sarge, it ain't doin' you much good keepin' t' yourself like this."
"How about we just stick to what we came out here to do?" Sarge muttered.
"Maybe it'd help if you, y'know, talked about yer feelin's." Applejack said.
"I would rather not. And when did you become Donut?"
"Ah've been meanin' t'ask you, who is this Donut character? Every now and again ah hear you say his name."
"He was one of my soldiers." Sarge muttered.
"Really? What happened t' him?" Applejack asked.
"He got shot and died." Sarge said, not turning to Applejack.
Applejack stood still and stared at Sarge. "Ah'm sorry Sarge, ah didn't mean t'-"
"Don't worry about it." Sarge grunted. "Let's find these wolves."
"Ah think ah understand..." Applejack said. "You blame yourself for that Donut fella's passing and you don't want to lose another one of your own."
Sarge stopped working briefly, turned to Applejack and gave her a limp shrug and went right back to work. They then heard three piercing screams. Sarge and Applejack shared a nervous look. "That sounded like-"
"Applebloom!" Applejack yelled.
Applejack and Sarge burst through the thick bushes to find the three crusaders surrounded by a pack of timberwolves. They crouched behind the bush and knew they had to come up with a plan.
"Sis' help!" Applebloom yelled.
"What are we goin' t' do?" Applejack asked. "I think I could take one or two but no more."
"You don't have to take any." Sarge said quietly, standing up.
"Sarge, you better not-" Applejack started, but Sarge leaped over the bush. "-do anythin' stupid." She trailed off, mainly to herself.
Sarge charged at the closest timberwolf to him, knocking it on the ground with the impact. The timberwolf next to him snarled and jumped at him, but Sarge bucked it, sending it flying through the trees. Another timberwolf tackled Sarge to the ground and went for his throat, but he managed to grab a stick and use it to fend off the approaching jaws. He took the next moment to kick the timberwolf off of him, leaving some teeth in the stick. The last few timberwolves turned to the stallion and stared at him with hungry eyes. Applejack jumped out from behind the bushes and stood next to Sarge. Sarge glanced behind Applejack to see the three crusaders trembling.
"Take the girls and run." Sarge said. "I'll fend them off for long enough to-"
"I'm not leaving you behind." Applejack said firmly.
"That wasn't a request." Sarge said, walking in front of Applejack. "It was an order."
"But what about the ingredient?" Applejack asked.
Sarge threw the stick at Applejacks feet. It had a few timberwolf teeth lodged in it. Applejack stared at it then back at Sarge.
"Go." Sarge yelled, running straight at the timberwolves.
Applejack looked at the girls and nodded. The girls started to run, but Applejack paused and looked back at Sarge. She then shook her head and caught up with the crusaders as they made their way to Zecora’s.
"What's Sarge doin'?" Applebloom asked while running next to her sister.
Applejack said nothing and kept pressing on, trying not to think about it. It took the four girls just a couple of minutes to arrive back at Zecora’s hut, bursting through the door, the large stick in her mouth. All the others were already back and their heads snapped to her as she spat the branch onto the ground.
"Where is the final ingredient?" Twilight asked.
"There's some teeth lodged up in this here stick." Applejack said, panting heavily as the crusaders then ran through the door and slammed it behind them.
"Girls? What are you doing here?" Twilight asked.
"We saw that Sarge was comin' in here with you guys." Applebloom started. "And we thought maybe we could come t'-"
Applejack turned suddenly as she remembered about the three little ponies that she had towed along. "What did ah tell you? Huh? Ah told you t' never come in here 'less you are with an older pony." The three fillies turned their heads down in guilt as Applejack reprimanded them.
"Where is Sarge?" Grif interrupted softly. "Don't tell me he didn't come to watch me in pain."
Applejack turned to Grif with sad eyes.
"He... he stayed behind." Applejack said, her voice suddenly much softer.
"What do you mean 'stayed behind'?" Simmons asked, though he already knew the answer.
"The girls were surrounded by the timberwolves, n' Sarge stayed back to slow 'em down so we could make it back." Applejack said. "I was goin' t' stay with him, but somepony needed to bring the girls t' safety."
The room fell silent as all eyes fell on Applejack.
"You know he's not dead, right?" Grif asked.
"I sure hope so..." Applejack said.
"No, I mean he... he is not dead." Grif said with disbelief. "He can't be."
"There was so many of 'em..." Applejack said.
"Don't worry, Grif just has trouble dealing with deaths." Simmons said. "Even when his sister-"
"My sister is still alive too you idiot..." Grif said quietly.
"Grif, I know you don't want to believe it." Twilight said quietly. "But the odds are-"
"Reds always go up against the odds and come out on top." Sarge said from outside. "But I might need some of that stew."
Grif's lips curled into a smile and he shook his head. Applejack ran up to the door and opened it and all the girls gasped. Sarge was standing there, wounds on his neck and legs, bleeding freely.
"Miss me?" Sarge said as he spat out some blood.
"I told you so." Grif said with a smirk.
Zecora scraped the poisonous secretion off of the teeth and dropped it in to the cauldron. Sarge slowly walked past the others, blood dripping onto the floor.
"Sarge..." Applejack said quietly, looking over his wounds.
"What?" Sarge grunted.
Applejack walked up to Sarge and hugged him. "Thanks fer riskin' your life on our part. That was very brave."
"Brave enough to get me a point in our little competition?" Sarge asked.
"Fine, but only 'cause you have a handicap." Applejack said with a smile.
Sarge grunted. He then turned his attention to Zecora and walked up to her. "Is there going to be enough of that for two?"
"I made enough so dozens of ponies could share this brew." Zecora said. "So I would say there will be more than enough for you."
"Good." Sarge said, taking a seat on the floor.
"Aren't you going to do anything about your injuries?" Twilight asked.
"I don't suppose you know how to?" Twilight shook her head. "Then no." Sarge said with a smile.
"Er, Sarge?" Applejack interjected, "ah think ah could try fixin' ya up if’n ya like."
Sarge turned to Applejack and gave a nod. "Sure why not. Beats looking at Grif's good-for-nothing mug any day."
"Glad to have you back Sarge." Grif said.
"Good to be back, Dirtbag." Sarge said.
"Hang on, ah need t' grab some supplies from my bag." Applejack dropped her bag to the floor and started to look through it, quickly producing a small box. She extracted a needle, a thread and a pair of tweezers from it.
"If you need privacy you may use my spare room." Zecora said, gazing in to the mixture. "I do not think the children should see such wounds."
"Thank ya kindly Zecora." Applejack said.
Applejack then opened the door to the room that Zecora had indicated, entering with Sarge.
"Okay, come near the window so ah can get some light." Applejack said.
Sarge nodded and sat down next to the window. Applejack looked over his wounds and realized they were worse than she had originally thought. She cleaned some of the blood away with a cloth. She then grabbed the thread and needle and started to stitch up the worst of the wounds. She worked in complete silence, concentrating on fixing Sarge up as much as she could and found herself done in a matter of minutes.
"Alright, you're done." Applejack said. "Ah apologize in advance, I ain't the best doctor in Equestria.."
"Much better than any other doctor I've met..." Sarge said with a gruff laugh. “Or medic for that matter.”
"Stay right here, ah'll be back right quick." Applejack said.
"Uh, okay." Sarge muttered.
Applejack walked back in to the main room and everypony looked at her.
"How is he?" Simmons asked.
"Patched him up best ah could. He should be up and at 'em once he drinks that stuff." Applejack said. Applejack then turned her attention to the three fillies. "Applebloom, you and the others need t' come with me."
"Yes sis'." Applebloom said.
The girls slowly followed Applejack to the room where Sarge was sitting idly. "Hey Sarge." They all said in unison.
"Hey." Sarge grunted.
"Well girls?" Applejack said after a couple seconds of silence. "Whaddaya say?"
"Sarge, I'm really sorry we caused this." Scootaloo said.
"We only came out here because you said you would help us find out cutie marks." Sweetie Belle said.
"We figured that if we followed ya we mighta' found 'em." Applebloom said.
"And?" Applejack pressed.
"We're sorry." The crusaders said in unison.
Sarge stared at the three crusaders whose heads were hanging low, avoiding eye contact.
"Don't be." Sarge grunted after a couple seconds of silence.
"Beg pardon?" Applejack said. "These girls almost got ya right killed."
"As I see it, if these girls hadn't followed us and screamed, we may not have found the timberwolves in time." Sarge said. "I'd say that they saved Grif's life, and as much as I hate to say it, I'd hate to see him go down like that."
"Hey, yeah!" Sweetie Belle said.
"We're like heroes or something." Scootaloo said. "Maybe we'll get our cutie marks for saving lives!"
The girls all looked at their flank at the same time and they each let out a sad sigh.
"But just because you saved his life doesn't mean what you did wasn't reckless." Sarge said. "And trust me, I've invented the meaning of that word."
"So... yarn't mad... but yarn't happy neither?" Applebloom asked.
"Exactly." Sarge said.
"Are we being punished?" Sweetie Belle asked nervously.
"I'll let Applejack decide that once we get back. I'm afraid my punishments might hospitalize you." Sarge said. "But for now let's get back to the others so I can drink that sludge."
Sarge then got off the floor and walked back to the main room and planted himself next to Zecora.
"Is it done yet?" Grif asked.
Zecora squinted at the mixture and gave a quick nod. She grabbed two glasses and filled them to the top. She gave one to Grif who took a sip and almost threw up.
"This shit is horrible." Grif said.
"They may taste bad, but once drunk things will look up." Zecora said. "But for the full effect, you must drink the entire cup."
"Quit being a wuss." Sarge muttered, chugging the bottle in one go. He then sniffed the empty bottle and gagged. "Ugh. It's quite pungent."
"It's fucking stinging my throat." Grif yelled, rubbing his neck. "And not in a good way."
"Zecora, I'll be honest with you..." Sarge said, starting to sense the aftertaste. "This tastes like pure gasoline."
"There is something about the potion I forgot to mention." Zecora said. "This is not a full antidote, merely a potion of suspension."
"Meaning?" Grif said nervously.
"I think she means that it will not get rid of the infection, it will just stop it from spreading." Twilight said.
"That is what it is, but have no fear. Given some time, the pain and moss shall clear." Zecora said. "The infection has not spread deep in to Sarge, so he will be completely cured of this charge."
"Okay so just to be sure, this moss shit will disappear and it will stop hurting." Grif asked. "And for the love of god don't rhyme for an answer, I'm having trouble keeping up here, just nod or shake your head."
Zecora thought for a second and then nodded.
"Fear not, for what remains within you will now provide durability." Zecora said, trying to use more simple words. "Making you stronger and hardier, without sacrificing agility."
"Hey Simmons, that means I'm just like you!" Grif said.
"What are you talking about?" Simmons asked.
"You're part robot and I'm part tree." Grif said. "Except my part actually sounds pretty damn useful."
The group of ponies said their thanks to Zecora and started to back down the trail to Ponyville.
"I can't wait to get some sleep." Tucker said. "I feel exhausted."
"We're all tired dipshit." Church muttered. "Though you're looking worse than Grif is."
"I feel quite good actually." Grif said with a chuckle. "How about you Sarge?"
"Besides the awful taste in my mouth, not too bad." Sarge said.
"I guess the blues are just fond of complaining." Grif said.
"Last time I go out of my way to save your lazy ass..." Church muttered.
They heard a snap to their left and they all turned to see a group of timberwolves following them. Sarge stepped in between the two groups. The timberwolves glanced at each other and disappeared back in to the bushes and trees.
"What did ya do to 'em?" Applejack asked.
"You don't want to know." Sarge said with a wicked grin.
"I would. Timberwolves are cunning, but they aren't easily scared." Twilight said. "You must have done something pretty bad to them to make them back off like that."
"Let's just say I may have bucked one so hard it may have..." Sarge started, pausing to think of a suitable word.
"May have what?" Church asked.
"Exploded." Sarge grunted finally.
"What do you mean by exploded?" Twilight asked.
"What does it sound like?" Sarge chuckled. "One of them pounced on my back to bite my neck. After it did, I kicked it in the body and it became firewood."
Twilight stared nervously at the others then back to Sarge. "That's impossible." Twilight said in disbelief. "Timberwolves are made out of extremely thick bark. It would take much more force than a buck to take one of them down, even more to 'explode' them as you put it."
"Maybe it didn't explode, but I sure as hell made the others back off." Sarge said. "All I know is that they left me alone after that."
Twilight thought for a moment and decided that she would have to think about this later.
"I just can't wait to get some sleep." Tucker said.
"Me too. We'll need our rest for tomorrow." Rainbow Dash said. "The Wonderbolts show is going to be so awesome. It's too bad that none of you guys are going."
"Actually me and Simmons are attending said event as well." Rarity said.
"Oh, are you buying tickets tomorrow too?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"No, me and Simmons got invited to it so we are going together." Rarity said.
Spike then glared at Simmons but Simmons avoided his eye contact.
"That's cool. Maybe we'll see you guys there." Rainbow Dash said.
"Maybe." Rarity said.
"Hey Tucker?" Rainbow Dash said.
"Yeah?"
"What happened back at the cave?"
"I don't know but it was pretty fucking cool." Tucker said excitedly.
"What happened?" Twilight asked.
"You should have seen it Twilight." Rainbow Dash said. "Tucker was fighting a cockatrice and out of nowhere, Tucker started to shoot electricity out of his body-"
"He shot electricity out of his body?" Church asked.
"Yeah, and then he charged his wings with it somehow and took the cockatrice to the back of the cave, and then when he was in there, the electricity shot out of both sides of his right foreleg, and it looked like a blade. And then he used the blade-thing to cut the cockatrice’s tail off."
Church looked over to Tucker and then nodded. "Looks like you brought it here with you."
"What do you mean Church?" Twilight asked.
"Before we came here, Tucker had this weapon." Church said. "An energy sword."
"What's an energy sword?" Rainbow Dash asked. "Sounds cool."
"It's exactly how it sounds, a sword that was made out of pure energy." Church said.
"Is he the only one who had one?" Twilight asked.
"Yeah. When he first found it and used it, it became tied to him. Like, he was the only one that could use it." Church said. "I'm guessing that it got carried over when we came here."
"But it was out of juice after the fight with the Meta." Tucker said.
"It must have gotten recharged somehow then." Church said.
"Maybe it was when I hit you with lightning." Rainbow Dash suggested.
"That would make the most sense." Church said. "I wonder what made it come out like that though."
"I think Sarge did that too!" Caboose said.
"Sarge never had a sword Caboose..." Church said.
"When I was with him at the place with the food and things-"
"The marketplace." Applejack filled in.
"Yeah the mark-it place!" Caboose said. "When we were there he kicked this one guy and it sounded like his shotgun!"
"I remember that." Sarge said with a laugh. "I sent his ass flying so damn hi-"
Sarge then grunted and thought for a second.
"What is ‘t'?" Applejack asked.
"I remember hearing that sound when I kicked the timberwolf too." Sarge said.
"You must have brought a remnant of your shotgun with you, but rather than a physical appearance it gives you the power to kick as hard as the shotgun hit." Church said. "That would explain why you sent him flying backwards, and why the timberwolf exploded."
"Then why din't the trees break when Sarge helped us harvest 'em?"Applejack asked.
"It might be related to heart rate." Twilight suggested.
"I would bet it’s either that or adrenaline." Church agreed. "When Tucker used his ability or whatever, it was when he was fighting the cockatrice. Same with Sarge when he fought the stallion and the timberwolves. We should look into this more later." Church said as they reached the edge of the forest. "But for now I think we should just get some rest. It's been a long fucking day."
They all shared a quick goodbye as they entered town and split up. Church, Twilight and Spike soon arrived back at the library, Twilight heading straight to bed. Spike however, was sitting on the balcony.
"What's on your mind?" Church asked.
"Nothing." Spike said quietly.
"Even though I've been here for a short time I already know when you're lying." Church said, chuckling for a brief moment. "It's about Simmons and Rarity, isn't it?"
Spike looked at Church and nodded his head. Church sighed and sat next to him.
"I think he is only going with her as a friend." Church said. "Not anything more, so you shouldn't be worrying."
"Maybe, but I can't help but feel that that could change..." Spike said sadly.
"You can't think like that. If you do the only person ending up hurt is yourself." Church said.
"Maybe you're right." Spike looked at the moon and sighed. He then stood up and started to make his way back in to the library. "You're a good guy, y'know that Church?"
"Get to know me more and you won't think that for long." Church said with a laugh, patting Spike on the back.
"I can't wait to go. It's going to be awesome!" Rainbow Dash said, hopping up and down with anticipation.
"So you've been saying for the past week." Tucker muttered dryly, taking a bite out of his sandwich.
"Sorry, it's just been my dream to join them since I was a filly. I get excited whenever I get the chance to see them." Rainbow Dash said.
"Don't worry about it, I do more than just babble when I'm over excited." Tucker said.
Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes but continued to smile.
"Alright, are you done yet? I'd really like to get going." Rainbow Dash said.
"Hold your horses babe." Tucker chuckled.
Rainbow Dash punched him lightly in the neck. Tucker kept eating his sandwich and did not turn around. "Tucker, you're a pain in the flank. But I have to say, you're pretty fun to have around. Y'know, besides the whole shower incident."
"You're telling me that as if I'm supposed to be surprised." Tucker said, turning to meet her look.
"If we go now we might be able to get some good seats." Rainbow Dash said. "I might have to hit you if we end up in the nosebleeds."
"Is that a promise?" Tucker asked innocently. "Bow chicka bow wow." Earning him a light swat from Rainbow Dash
Tucker and Rainbow Dash soon made their way to the Cloudaseum where some pegasi were already making their way in. Rainbow Dash zoomed to the entrance and waited next to it impatiently, "Hurry up!"
"Sure." Tucker said, speeding towards her before crashing clumsily onto the cloud.
"Classy." Rainbow Dash said with a joyful glint in her eyes.
"That's just how I roll." Tucker said, slowly standing on the cloud. "This feels awkward to stand on."
"That's because it's a cloud. You're lucky you're a pegasus otherwise you wouldn't be able to stand on it. Now come on." Rainbow Dash said as she turned to the entrance with a sack of bits in her hoof. "We'll have two tickets to the Wonderbolts, and make it fast."
"Can't. We're sold out." The pegasus behind the counter said.
"What?" Rainbow Dash gasped.
Rainbow Turned to Tucker and she had a certain fire in her eye that unsettled Tucker.
"Hello Rainbow Dash, hello Tucker." Rarity said.
"Oh thank god." Tucker muttered.
"Hey." Rainbow Dash said sadly.
"What's wrong?" Simmons asked.
"We found out that the tickets are sold out." Rainbow Dash said, looking back at Tucker.
Tucker avoided her eye contact like the plague and tried to change the subject, finding it hard due to the fact that the Cloudaseum was right behind him. "So how are you guys standing up here?"
"Twilight taught me the spell she used before we last came to Cloudsdale. It allows me and Simmons to stand on clouds." Rarity explained. Rarity then turned her attention to her friend. "Are you okay?"
"I guess... I just hoped that I would be able to see the show. They're saying that it'll be their best one yet." Rainbow Dash said, shoulders sagging. "They have a whole new routine and everything... I guess I'll have to see it later."
Rarity watched as Rainbow Dash slowly walked to the edge of the cloud. She then looked at Simmons and raised an inquisitive brow to Simmons. Simmons looked at Tucker who was looking at Rainbow Dash guiltily. Simmons then turned back to Rarity and nodded slowly.
"Say Rainbow Dash..." Rarity said, walking next to her.
"Yeah?" Rainbow Dash asked quietly.
"I know how important this is to you, so-"
"Ah, there she is!" Boomed a powerful stallion’s voice.
Rarity's head turned to see Flint Westhoof standing a couple meters away, surrounded by fans.
"Oh, hello Mr. Westhoof." Rarity said.
"Come now, you don't have to refer to me formally. We are here for recreation, not a business venture." Flint said with a chuckle. Flint then looked at Rainbow Dash who was staring blankly at him. "Who are your friends?"
"Oh, this is Rainbow Dash." Rarity said. "She is the biggest Wonderbolts fan I know which is why-"
"The event will be starting shortly." A voice boomed over a speaker.
"That is our cue." Flint said, putting one foreleg over Rarity and the other over Simmons. "I told many other ponies about the designs that you and Simmons have made and they are just dying to meet you."
"That's great but-" Rarity started.
"No need to thank me, it's the least I could do." Flint said, walking in to the Cloudaseum, dragging Rarity and Simmons with him.
Rarity looked back at Rainbow Dash and Tucker who were starting to leave.
"Let's go to the back. Maybe we can see them while they're coming in." Rainbow Dash said.
"Sure." Tucker said, walking next to Rainbow Dash.
They soon found themselves at the back entrance where a large crowd was formed, in which every single pegasus was cheering. A loud pop was heard as several pegasi zoomed towards the entrance. The cheering intensified as the group came to a smooth landing and slowly started towards the door.
"Spitfire! Hey Spitfire!" Rainbow Dash called out.
"Oh, how's it going Rainbow Dash?" Spitfire asked.
"Good. Well, besides the fact that I came here to watch you guys fly and finding the tickets to be sold out." Rainbow Dash said dejectedly.
"I'm sorry to hear about that." Spitfire said. "I'm sorry, but I'll have to cut our chat short. It's showtime."
Spitfire then turned towards the door with the other Wonderbolt members.
"You saved her life and that's how she thanks you? What a bitch." Tucker said.
The crowd gasped in unison, Spitfire turned and stared curiously at Tucker.
"Tucker! What the hay!" Rainbow Dash exclaimed in a horrified whisper.
"And who are you?" Spitfire asked.
"A friend." Tucker stated simply.
"Well sorry friend, but there isn't much I can do on such short notice." Spitfire said.
"I'm sure there is and you're just being lazy." Tucker said.
"Lazy?" Spitfire said with a brief laugh. "You sure know how to pick 'em Dash. And here I thought you were cool."
"She's infinitely cooler than you are." Tucker said.
"Wow, aren't you the bold one?" Spitfire asked.
"I think I know a way we can both get what we want." Tucker said.
"Oh? And what would that be?" Spitfire asked.
"I challenge you to a flying competition." Tucker said smugly.
"You're way out of your league kid." Soarin chuckled. Not as a sign of contempt, but rather a warning.
"Do I detect a hint of fear in that voice?" Tucker asked.
The entire crowd, including Rainbow Dash, gasped and looked over at the leader of the Wonderbolts with mouths agape. Spitfire looked over at Soarin and they both nodded.
"Know what? You're on." Spitfire said, giving Tucker’s hoof a firm shake before flying in to the Cloudaseum.
"Tucker what did you just do? We're gonna be the laughing stock of Cloudsdale." Rainbow Dash said furiously.
"C'mon Dash, don't you trust me?" Tucker said, walking confidently in to the Cloudaseum.
Tucker walked in to the Cloudaseum and took in the surroundings. It was much like he believed the Colosseum to look like, except that there wasn’t a floor. Rainbow Dash was slowly creeping in behind Tucker, crouching ever so slightly as she found herself stricken by fear. Up in the VIP booth, Simmons and Rarity were standing at the front, watching as the Wonderbolts shot in to the Cloudaseum and straight to the announcers booth.
"Attention everypony!" A thunderous voice exclaimed on the loudspeakers. "There is a change in the schedule. It seems that a pair of pegasi have challenged the Wonderbolts to a flying competition."
"It's quite a shame that Rainbow Dash and Tucker couldn't see this. Rainbow Dash would feel so sorry for whoever challenged the Wonderbolts." Rarity said.
"Yeah..." Simmons said, turning to look at where the Wonderbolts had entered. "Say, isn't that them down there?"
"What?" Rarity said, looking at where Simmons was looking and her jaw dropped. "This is not going to end well."
Rainbow Dash quickly walked behind Tucker trying to hide behind him. "What's wrong?" Tucker asked.
"Everything is wrong. Why would you talk to the Wonderbolts that way?" Rainbow Dash muttered.
"Because they were acting like stuck up assholes." Tucker said.
"No they weren't. They just needed to get inside because they have a performance you idiot." Rainbow Dash said.
"Well they owe you one. And now we get to see their show up close, so why are you complaining?" Tucker asked.
"I'm complaining because you made them think I'm a... a..."
"A bitch?" Tucker asked with a chuckle.
"This isn't funny Tucker." Rainbow Dash growled. "You've single-handedly ruined my chances with them! They'll never let me join them now."
"What if we beat them?" Tucker asked.
"How do you expect us to beat them? They train every single day non-stop!" Rainbow Dash said.
"I have a plan, don't worry about it." Tucker said.
"What's your plan?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Well I was thinking that you could do that rainbow thing an-"
"WHAT? That’s your plan?" Rainbow Dash yelled.
"Yeah, why? Can't you just do it whenever?" Tucker asked.
"No, I can't! I don't control when I do it, it just happens! What else does your plan entail? Did you expect some miracles to just happen?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Not really, the rainbow thing was all I really had going for me." Tucker said.
Rainbow Dash glared at Tucker as her shoulders deflated. Spitfire, Soarin and a couple other Wonderbolts flew next to Tucker and Rainbow Dash.
"Hey, I just wanted to wish you guys luck!" Spitfire said, extending her hoof to Tucker.
"Nah you should hold on to it." Tucker said.
Spitfire laughed and nodded to Tucker.
"Alright then. I hope you guys have fun then." Spitfire said before shooting towards the starting point.
"The Wonderbolts will now be performing their new show, so sit tight and enjoy!" The announcer called out.
"You have a habit of digging yourself into deep holes, don't you?" Rainbow Dash muttered.
"Yeah, I guess you could say that." Tucker said.
Four of the Wonderbolts took to the air, each wielding a large metal cylinder on their backs from opposite sides of the Cloudaseum.
"What are those?" Tucker asked.
"I have no idea." Rainbow Dash said.
As the Wonderbolts got a decent distance away from each other they all made sudden turns and started to fly towards the center of the Cloudaseum. They were a few dozen feet away from each other before they each pulled a chord that was attached to their cylinder. The cylinders then started to release a large amount of dark clouds that trailed behind them. When they were but a few feet away from each other they all veered to the right and started to spin in a circle. Another four Wonderbolts started to fly from where the others were and they started pushing the clouds towards where the original four were spinning.
"What are they doing?" Tucker asked.
"Shh." Rainbow Dash said, focusing on the group.
Spitfire and Soarin then came from the top and went in the middle of the spinning Wonderbolts. The four Wonderbolts that were holding the clouds kicked them at their spinning group members and they took them away. Spitfire and Soarin nodded at each other and they started to spin in the same direction as the other four, but in a tighter and sharper circle. The four that were spinning started to release some of the clouds, making a ring of clouds in between them. They then started to slowly move up, making a spinning trail of clouds. As they gained altitude they started circling faster and soon the clouds were spinning in unison.
"Are they making a tornado?" Simmons muttered.
"Looks like it." Flint chuckled. "This is quite exhilarating.
"Isn't that dangerous?" Simmons asked.
"They're professionals Simmons, I wouldn’t worry about it." Rarity said with a smile.
Simmons looked at the tornado that was being formed as it got larger and larger until the original four ran out of clouds. Once they did they shot upwards in unison with Spitfire and Soarin and they all took turns flying straight through the tornado, not affected by the sharp winds inside as well as dodging bolts of electricity that were shooting around the inside. Once they all went through the tornado they all started spinning alongside it, picking away at the clouds until the tornado dispersed. The Wonderbolts then started spelling out the group’s name with the bits of cloud, to which the crowd responded to with a large amount of cheering.
"We're doomed." Rainbow Dash said.
"Maybe not." Tucker said with a smirk, flapping his wings lightly.
"You're up." Spitfire said as she flew past Tucker.
Tucker looked over to Rainbow Dash who was shaking from fear.
"Are you afraid of performing in front of crowds?" Tucker asked with a laugh.
"No, I just don't like the idea of being laughed out of Cloudsdale and being shunned forever!" Rainbow Dash said.
"Well it will probably make it worse if you leave without giving it a shot." Tucker said.
"Yeah, yeah." Rainbow Dash said, starting to fly towards the middle of the arena.
Tucker started to fly around, grabbing all the large clouds that were spread about, bringing them towards the middle.
"What are you planning?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"I'm not planning. I'm just winging it." Tucker said with a smirk, to which Rainbow Dash glared at him as a response. "Just fly around and do some stunts, I got this."
Rainbow Dash nodded and started to fly around, doing aerial moves that she had done many times before to stall the crowd to allow Tucker to prepare. Once Tucker had a satisfying amount of the heavy, black clouds, occasionally shooting off lightning. He shifted uneasily and looked at Rainbow Dash, preparing himself for the stunt that he was about to pull.
"What are you going to do?" Rainbow Dash said.
"You'll see." Tucker said with a weak smile.
Tucker then swerved into the dark clouds and started to fly around inside of them, trying to gain some of the electrical current. He slowly started to build up electricity as he flew, making his body shoot off some sparks. Then a lightning bolt struck Tucker and he fell out of the clouds and started spiraling towards the ground, barely conscious.
The crowd watched as Tucker fell at an intense speed, believing it to be part of some sort of routine. Rainbow Dash watched Tucker for a few seconds thinking the same thing before realizing this was real. She then surged downward with her forelegs extended and wings collapsed to minimize wind resistance. The crowd realized by the expression of fear on her face that this was not planned. The pressure of the wind rippled along Rainbow Dash's face, fiercely contorting it, as she continued going down. Tucker was getting too close to the ground. Rainbow Dash shook the negative thoughts from her head and grunted as she continued her power-dive, hooves first. The pressure on her hooves was growing stronger as she dove. Suddenly the scene in front of Rainbow Dash became extremely bright and a visible cone of wind surged past her.
"What is she doing?" Simmons asked.
"Shh." Rarity said, focusing on Rainbow Dash.
Tucker was twenty seconds from hitting the ground. Rainbow Dash surged forwards and a large explosion of color shot out from behind her.
"What the-" Flint started.
Seventeen seconds until impact, Rainbow Dash continued to surge forward and the pain of the pressure was starting to hit her.
"What was that?" Simmons asked.
Twelve seconds until impact, Tucker was gaining speed as he fell and Rainbow Dash was slowly gaining.
"Come on Rainbow Dash." Rarity whispered.
Eight seconds until impact, Rainbow Dash was getting close but it was going to be a close call.
"I can't look." Simmons said, closing his eyes.
Four seconds until impact, Tucker opened his eyes and looked at Rainbow Dash and winked.
"Wha-" Rainbow Dash started.
Tucker opened his wings and surged upwards, flying past Rainbow Dash. Tucker put one hoof on the trail of rainbows behind her and started to spin around it. The crowd watched attentively as Tucker was somehow manipulating the rainbow, making it start to spin. He continued going upwards towards the base of the rainboom, the electricity exerted off of his body constantly changing colors.
"What is he doing?" Simmons said as everypony else in the stadium gawked.
Tucker looked down at Rainbow Dash who had a look of disbelief on her face. Tucker looked back up and continued spinning, with the rainbow, which was starting to spin more violently. He was getting close to the edge of the trail and the rainbow then started to spin with great speeds, making a multicolored tornado. The crowd started cheering as he reached the end of the trail, multicolored electricity still shown shooting out of him. He looked up at the clouds and shot towards them, a trail of rainbow electricity following him. When he reached the clouds he channeled as much of the energy as he could and shot into the clouds. The clouds then flashed green and Tucker did not shoot out the other side.
"Where did he go?" Rainbow Dash asked quietly to herself.
Rainbow Dash flew upwards towards the clouds and started to fly inside them but Tucker was nowhere to be found.
"Is he inside the cloud?" Flint asked.
"Impossible. He had way too much momentum to just stop." Simmons said.
"Then what wa-"
A green flash appeared in the VIP area and a black pegasus came screeching to a halt right in front of Flint.
"Who are you?" Flint asked.
Simmons shook his head with a loose smile. "You got something on you."
The black pegasus looked down and groaned.
"Really? The black shit came with me too?" He muttered.
"Is that who I think it is?" Rarity asked.
Simmons nodded as the black pegasus shook off the worst of the black stuff. "Nice going Tucker."
"Thanks." Tucker said, patting off the rest of the black stuff.
Tucker then flew out of the VIP area and behind Rainbow Dash who was still looking for him. Tucker tapped her on the shoulder and coughed. Rainbow Dash turned around and looked at Tucker who was smiling at her.
"I told you I had a plan." Tucker snickered.
Rainbow Dash then gave Tucker a swift kick to the balls.
"Fuck!" Tucker grunted, remembering to flap his wings as to not fall. "That wasn't what I was expecting."
"Be glad that it isn't worse than that." Rainbow Dash snickered.
"What was the kick for?" Tucker asked still cringing from the pain.
"That was for not letting me in on your little plan. And don't you ever make me worried like that again." Rainbow Dash said.
"So... you were worried for me, huh?" Tucker said with a smile.
Rainbow Dash blushed slightly, but quickly shook it off. "Yeah, well... who knows what Celestia would do if you died when I was supposed to be watching you." Rainbow Dash said before flying back down to the stadium.
"I'm sure that's the reason you were worried." Tucker said with a laugh before following her.
"That was amazing." Rarity said as the pair landed next to them.
"I know it was." Tucker said.
"Hey Rainbow Dash, mind coming over here for a sec?" Spitfire said as she landed in the VIP area with Soarin and two other Wonderbolts.
"Yeah." Rainbow Dash said before turning to Tucker. "Stay. Right. Here."
"What? Can't I come over and say hello?" Tucker asked innocently.
Rainbow Dash shook her head and trotted up to Spitfire and nodded.
"First off, I just want to congratulate you and your... friend. I didn't think bending a rainbow was possible so good job on that." Spitfire said, extending her hoof.
"Thanks Spitfire." Rainbow Dash said excitedly as she shook her idols hoof.
"I also want to give you two things. First one being an apology." Spitfire said in a sincere voice. "I really should have thanked you more than I had for saving our lives."
"Don't worry about it." Rainbow Dash said.
"The second thing I want to give you is an invitation." Spitfire said.
"An invitation?" Rainbow Dash asked.
Spitfire looked back at one of the Wonderbolts and nodded. The Wonderbolt then took out an envelope and handed it to Rainbow Dash. She hastily opened it and sifted through the letter.
"You want me to join the Wonderbolts?" Rainbow Dash said, giddy with excitement.
"We know it's been your dream so we felt this was an apt way to apologize to you." Spitfire said.
Rainbow Dash's smile grew large and she looked at Tucker who was laughing with Simmons.
"As much as I'll hate myself for this... I think I'll pass." Rainbow Dash said quietly.
"You'll pass?" Spitfire asked curiously.
"I think I'll stick with Tucker for awhile. The Princess ordered me to watch him. I don't want to get banished for disobeying orders." Rainbow Dash said.
Spitfire looked at Tucker and her features softened. "I understand." Spitfire said with a nod.
Rainbow Dash held up the invitation to her but Spitfire just stared at it. "Keep it. You can look us up later if you change your mind." Spitfire said, turning to leave. She then paused and giggled. "But next time keep him on a tighter leash."
And with that, the Wonderbolts left the stadium.
"That was amazingly done." Flint said, walking up to Tucker.
"Uh, thanks." Tucker said, who was now starting to feel the pain of the kick. "Who are you exactly?"
"My name is Flint Westhoof. But you can call me Flint." Flint said, extending his hoof to Tucker. "That was remarkable. How much time did you spend practicing that?"
"None. I kind of just made it up on the spot." Tucker said.
"I find that hard to believe." Flint said.
"It's true, Tucker has never led me to believe that he ever thinks ahead on anything." Simmons said.
"Thanks Simmons." Tucker said sarcastically.
"That makes it even more impressive." Flint chuckled.
"Thanks, I guess." Tucker said.
"Tucker, I am in awe. That was beautifully done." Rarity said.
"Glad you liked it." Tucker laughed.
Rainbow Dash then walked up to Tucker and punched him in the shoulder. "Come on Rarity, don't make Tucker's ego any bigger. He might end up being too heavy to stand on the clouds." Rainbow Dash said.
"I don't think it can get any bigger than it already is." Simmons chuckled.
Tucker glared at Simmons but started to laugh. He then turned to Rainbow Dash and winked.
"You're just jealous because you didn't think of making a tornainbow." Tucker said.
"Right, because I want to think like an idiot and come up with stupid names for things." Rainbow Dash said with a smile.
"Pft, say what you want, I know you're impressed." Tucker said.
"Well maybe just a little bit." Rainbow Dash said.
"What is in the envelope?" Rarity asked.
"Nothing." Rainbow Dash said, tucking the envelope under her wing. "Nothing at all."
Rarity looked at Simmons and they both shared a shrug. Simmons then looked at Tucker and started to smile.
"What are you smiling about?" Tucker asked.
"Look." Simmons said simply.
Tucker looked at his flank and saw that he had gained his mark. It was a double helix, one strand being a lightning bolt, the other being a rainbow, and at the top the two strand met and a green star was at the top. "Sweet." Tucker said emphatically.
"Looking good Tucker." Rainbow Dash said.
"Aren't I always?" Tucker asked sweetly.
"Maybe when you're on your own, but when you're with me I make you look terrible." Rainbow Dash said.
"Very funny." Tucker muttered.
"Do you have any plans?" Flint asked.
"Sorry man, I don't swing that way." Tucker said flatly.
"You misunderstand. I simply wanted to invite you all to lunch, my treat." Flint said.
"That sounds like a marvelous idea." Rarity said.
"Sounds good to me." Simmons said.
"I could eat." Tucker said. He then turned to Rainbow Dash and waited for an answer.
"Sure why not." Rainbow Dash said. "It's not like I have anything better to do."
"Excellent!" Flint said. "Come with me, I know the finest restaurant in all of Equestria."
The group then shared a nod and they all started to make their way out of the Cloudaseum. Flint then led them all to a large balloon in which they all entered. They chatted for an hour until the balloon landed in front of Canterlot.
"Follow me, it is just a short walk from here." Flint said.
"Okay." Simmons said.
They all followed Flint away from the balloon. After a few minutes they stood in front of a large building with six stars sitting on top of it. "Is this where I think it is?" Rarity asked giddily.
"Yes indeed. Luxor Palace, the most expensive restaurant in all of Equestria." Flint said. He then turned to the others and raised his brow. "Shall we?"
Flint then led the group inside, where they were shown to the restaurant’s finest table. Tucker opened the menu and skimmed through it and noticed something.
They really don't eat meat here, do they? Tucker thought to himself.
The waiter soon arrived and took their orders and hastily left to the kitchen. It took just a few minutes for the waiter to come out with all their dishes and he apologized for the wait.
"I think I like this place already." Simmons said, taking a few bites out of his food.
"Yeah, it's just fantastic." Tucker said, looking at his dish. It wasn't any meat, but that didn't stop it from looking delicious.
"Thank you very much for the meal Flint." Rarity said. "I would say this has been a fantastic day."
"Not at all." Flint replied gladly.
Once they all finished their food, Flint paid the bill and they all made their way out of the restaurant.
"I apologize for this, but do you think you could make it home from here?" Flint asked.
"I think we can manage." Simmons said.
"Good. I hope you all have a fine evening." Flint said. He then bowed and started to trot away.
"Rarity, you and Simmons go on ahead, I need to talk to Tucker." Rainbow Dash said.
"Of course Rainbow Dash. Come Simmons, I simply must show you around." Rarity said.
Rarity and Simmons then left the pair alone and Rainbow Dash sighed.
"What's up?" Tucker asked.
Rainbow Dash looked at the envelope and back to Tucker. She then walked up to him and hugged him tightly.
"Thank you." Rainbow Dash said quietly.
"No problem, it's what I do." Tucker said.
"I'm serious Tucker." Rainbow Dash chuckled. "I'm glad that you did what you did. I don't think I can ever repay you..."
"I can think of one way." Tucker said, raising his eyebrow.
Rainbow Dash shook her head with a crooked smile. "You're really a dog with a bone, aren't you?"
"Yeah, but with a different kind of bone. Bow chicka bow wow." Tucker said, a smile plastered across his muzzle.
Rainbow Dash gazed deeply into Tucker’s eyes and smiled. "What's on your mind?" Tucker asked.
"Well, it's just that... Celestia how do I say this?" Rainbow Dash said quietly, rubbing the back of her neck. "I think I love you."
"What's not to love?" Tucker asked with a smile.
Rainbow Dash smirked and hit him in his shoulder.
"So do you have anything to say?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Yeah, what's for dessert?" Tucker asked.
"I mean do you have anything to say about me?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Hmm. Well I have to say that you are pretty hot." Tucker said.
Rainbow Dash turned to Tucker and stared at him seriously.
"Anything else?" Rainbow Dash asked, her voice gaining an icy tone.
"Uh, I like your mane?" Tucker said awkwardly.
"Are you afraid of saying love or something?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Well, love is a strong word Dash." Tucker said with an awkward laugh.
Rainbow Dash then pushed herself away, staring past Tucker. "What do you mean?" Rainbow Dash asked seriously.
"Well, I mean I've only been here for a couple weeks." Tucker said. "And I do like you, it's just-"
"I can't believe that I actually thought that I liked you." Rainbow Dash yelled, voice cracking.
"Rainbow Dash-" Tucker started.
"I don't want to hear anything you have to say. And I never want to see you near my place again!" Rainbow Dash yelled, angry tears starting to trickle down her cheeks.
Tucker opened his mouth to talk but Rainbow Dash already started to fly away, leaving Tucker all alone. "I really fucked up this time, didn't I?" Tucker muttered to himself.
Twilight got out of her room and made her way downstairs, where Church was looking through the bookshelves.
"Hello Church." Twilight said quietly as she walked up behind him.
"Hey Twilight." Church grunted, his eyes still scanning the shelves.
"Do you like to read?" Twilight asked happily.
"Not really. I just figured I should do something rather than sit around all day." Church muttered.
"Are you looking for anything in particular?" Twilight asked as she walked next to him to help.
"Nope, just looking at what you've got. I have to say, for all the books you have you certainly don't have much of a selection." Church said with a laugh.
"What do you mean by that?" Twilight asked curiously.
"Well you mostly just have books on magic and history, you don't have any fictional books." Church said then chuckled lightly."I didn't think I'd ever hear myself putting magic in the same category as non-fiction."
Twilight giggled and used her magic and pulled out a few books. She looked at their titles and nodded at a few of them. She stacked them on top of each other and placed them on the table.
"What kind of books are those?" Church asked.
"I pulled out a variety of books. There is an adventure book, a book on psychology..." Twilight said and looked away. "And a book on magic."
"Of course it is." Church said. "I should probably start learning this magic stuff anyways."
"If you need any help with anything don't hesitate to tell me." Twilight said as she walked in to the next room.
"Will do." Church grunted.
Church grabbed the magic book out of the stack and looked at the cover. The title was 'Magic for Fillies'. Church looked at the door to the other room and grunted.
"I guess I should start with the basics anyways." Church muttered dryly before opening the book. He quickly glossed over the first few pages that explained how to do seemingly menial things, like how to open a door. Church shrugged and focused on the door and his horn had a faint glow to it. He squinted his eyes on the handle of the door and started walking closer to it. He then closed his eyes fully and the door shot open and he felt a searing pain shoot through his face as the door hit him in the face.
"Hey, I did it!" Church said in a voice that was a mix of happiness and pain.
"The fuck are you on about?" Tucker asked quietly.
Church's eyes snapped open and he glared at Tucker.
"Of course, it's just you." Church grunted sourly. "What are you doing here?"
"I screwed up." Tucker said quietly.
"Well isn't that a surprise? It is good to see you are keeping up with your fuck up quota." Church said.
"No, I mean I think I really screwed up this time." Tucker muttered.
Church stared silently at Tucker, noting his bloodshot eyes. "What happened?" Church said after a few seconds of silence.
"Long story short, I stood up for Dash, she said she loved me, I didn't." Tucker said.
"Well done, you receive the biggest idiot of the year awards. Better go tell Caboose that his reign as champion is over." Church said with a cruel laugh.
"Honestly, I don't even fucking care." Tucker muttered, about to turn back out the door. "I should have known you would be a dick as usual."
"You've never really been the most supportive guy either." Church said.
"That's because you're always bitching about something." Tucker laughed roughly.
"What do you want me to do then?" Church asked.
"I don't know, you usually do something stupid that ends up going well for you." Tucker replied.
"When has anything ever gone well for me exactly?" Church asked curiously.
"That's not important." Tucker groaned. "You need to help me figure this out."
"I need to help you? Why would I want to do that? I think it's hilarious seeing you this far up shit creek." Church said.
Before Tucker could say anything, Twilight walked back in to the room. "Hello Tucker, what brings you here?"
"Do you think you could help me?" Tucker asked quietly.
"That depends what you need help with." Twilight replied.
"He thinks that Rainbow Dash likes him and he pissed her off." Church said.
"I can try to help." Twilight said, nodding slowly. "Tell me everything that happened."
Tucker sat down and quickly ran through the details; the Wonderbolts, the stunt, how he teleported, the dinner and finally where Dash said she liked him.
"Rainbow Dash was always a stubborn pegasus so we may have a bit of trouble." Twilight said.
"She sounds like the perfect match for Tucker then." Church chuckled.
Tucker ignored Church and kept looking at Twilight.
"Do you think you have anything you could say that would help me?" Tucker asked.
"Maybe." Twilight said as she searched her thoughts. Her eyes went wide for a brief moment and she looked at Tucker. "Tell me about your dream."
"What dream?" Tucker asked.
"The nightmare you had, about the cupcakes." Twilight said quietly.
"How is that going to help me exactly?" Tucker moaned.
"Just do it." Church said.
"Fine." Tucker muttered.
Tucker then gave a quick summary of his nightmare. Twilight looked over to Church and they both nodded slowly as he finished his story.
"There, did that help?" Tucker asked sarcastically.
"More than you would think." Twilight replied quietly.
"What do you mean?" Tucker asked hesitantly.
"I don't think you were scared to die..." Twilight said quietly.
"Okay, good to know. What does that have to do with anything?" Tucker asked.
"She means that you were scared for Rainbow Dash." Church said.
"No way, I'm a manly man. I don't have time for bullshit feelings." Tucker grunted.
"You really are like her." Twilight noted.
"So I was worried about her. How is that going to help me?" Tucker asked.
"Maybe you should tell her how you actually feel. She likes you for you, as surprising as that is. Why would you throw it away just because you are afraid of saying three words." Church said.
Tucker blinked for a few seconds and slowly nodded as it sunk in. "You're right." Tucker said quickly. "You know, maybe you aren't as big of a bitch as I thought you were Church."
"I already regret helping you." Church laughed.
"Seriously though, thanks." Tucker said, taking off straight for Rainbow Dash's place.
When Rainbow Dash back to her house, she flew straight up to her room, slamming the door after her.
"Why on earth did I think that I liked him?" Rainbow Dash asked herself as she threw her letter onto the bed.
She sat on her bed and looked out the window at the rising moon, her mind racing at what had transpired. After a few minutes she let out a sad sigh and laid down in an attempt to ease her tired mind. She suddenly sat straight up and looked at the foot of her bed. She hadn’t realized how much she’d already gotten used to having Tucker there with her, and it left her restless. She quickly crawled to the other side of the bed and snatched up the envelope and opened it and quickly read through it, trying to take her mind off the events of that afternoon once again. She tossed the envelope and letter on her bedside table in disgust, and looked out the window, images of the Wonderbolts performing spectacular stunts flying across her vision. Rainbow Dash couldn’t take it anymore. She flew out, locking the door behind her, before flying off to Cloudsdale.
A couple minutes later Tucker arrived at her place. He peered in through one of the first-floor windows. "Dash you up there?" Tucker flew up to the door and sighed as he tried to open it. "Come down and open the damn door."
Tucker stared up at the second story window for a few seconds, then started banging on the door. "I know you're in there. Can I just talk to you for a minute?" Tucker pleaded.
Tucker received no answer so he scowled and glared back up at the window. "I'm coming in whether you want me to or not." Tucker said.
"One." Still no answer. Tucker sighed once again and shook his forelegs
"Two..." Tucker said, bringing his hoof back. Rainbow Dash still gave no answer and Tucker shook his head as he reared up on his hind legs.
"Three. Alright, I warned you." Tucker threw his front hooves into the door, knocking it straight off of its hinges. He immediately flew into the main room, scanning it quickly. Tucker then faced towards the stairs and sighed.
"Come on, I'm not good at this apologizing stuff and you're not making it any easier!" Tucker called out.
Rainbow Dash remained silent, so Tucker ran straight up to the bedroom and gave the door a quick knock. After a few seconds he pulled the door open and saw that the room was empty. "Are you in here?" Tucker asked. He grunted and sat on the edge of the bed and rubbed his face with a light groan. He looked on the bedside table and saw a ripped envelope with a piece of paper under it. He snapped it up and read it quickly under his breath.
“Congratulations on your invitation to the Wonderbolts. You have been given this letter for demonstrating a great aptitude and passion for flying. If you would like to join us for a practice session, we are at our training facility daily from dawn until midday. You can use this letter as a guaranteed pass to enter the training center, as we do not guarantee recognition of every new face. We hope to see you soon.
Happy Flying,
Spitfire
Captain of the Wonderbolts”
He threw the piece of paper back on to the bedside table and kicked it over.
"Son of a bitch." Tucker muttered.
Tucker laid down on the bed. He stared at the ceiling for an hour, thinking of what he should do. An idea popped into his head and he got off the bed, snagging the letter off the ground and quickly read through it again. Tucker’s lips spread into a smile as he got to the end.
"...You can use this letter as a guaranteed pass to enter the training center, as we do not guarantee recognition of every new face." Tucker read happily. "I guess I'm joining the Wonderbolts."
Tucker then looked out the window and saw the moon high in the sky. He stretched his wings and plopped down on the bed.
"Guess I should grab some sleep while I wait for morning." Tucker yawned before falling asleep.
When Tucker woke up he grabbed the letter, rushed down the stairs and made his way straight to Cloudsdale. He didn't know where exactly where the Wonderbolts’ training center was, so he would need to find some other pegasus that could point him in the right direction. Once he arrived in Cloudsdale he did not see anypony in the area. He looked at the horizon and noted that the sun still hasn't started to rise yet.
"Uh, hello? It's Tucker, right?" A voice suddenly came from behind him.
Tucker spun around to be greeted by a blue pegasus who was smiling at him.
"Do I know you?" Tucker muttered quietly.
The blue pegasus looked at himself and chuckled. "Right. I'm not wearing my uniform." The pegasus said, rubbing the back of his neck. "We met yesterday at the Cloudaseum. I'm Soarin, from the Wonderbolts."
"Oh yeah." Tucker said. He then started to smile. "Hey, you're on your way to your practice right?"
"Yeah, why?" Soarin asked curiously, eyebrow raised.
"I was wondering if I could come with you and try out for the team." Tucker said.
"I don't know, you didn't exactly make Spitfire happy with your attitude yesterday." Soarin said with a smile. "Plus I'm pretty sure she didn't give you an invite."
"Too bad for her." Tucker said, pulling the envelope out from under his wing, returning Soarin's smile. "It says that if I have this I will be allowed to try out, even if she doesn't remember giving it to me."
Soarin let out a brief laugh and nodded slowly. "I always told her that she should change what they said. Come on, it's not far from here, and if we hurry we should be able to make it there before they start." Soarin said, starting to walk across the clouds. "I'm usually a bit late so that won't surprise her, but I think after seeing you she will be."
"Well I hope it's a pleasant surprise then." Tucker chuckled before following Soarin to the practice area.
Tucker and Soarin landed on a large cloud in an open air space, with a small building sitting atop of the cloud. Soarin motioned his head towards it and the two slowly walked up to the entrance. Soarin knocked on the door.
"Late as usual, eh Soarin?" Spitfire chuckled. "You really need to start waking up earlier."
"This time it isn't my fault. It seems like we got some new fodder to test." Soarin yelled sarcastically.
"What? Who is it?" Spitfire asked curiously before opening the door.
Spitfire looked out to see Tucker staring right back at her. She raised her brow and looked at Soarin.
"Hey, don't blame me, this is all on you this time." Soarin said with a weak laugh.
"What's he doing here?" Came a harsh voice from the inside.
"I came here to join the Wonderbolts." Tucker replied smugly.
Rainbow Dash appeared from behind Spitfire and glared at Tucker.
"Miss me?" Tucker chuckled.
"Hardly." Rainbow Dash replied icily.
Soarin looked between Tucker and Rainbow Dash, so he leaned closer to Tucker. "What happened?" he asked quietly.
"Long story short, mistakes were made." Tucker replied even quieter.
"Female troubles?" Soarin asked with a small laugh.
"When isn't it?" Tucker said and they both broke into full-hearted laughter.
"Why are you here?" Rainbow Dash asked bluntly.
"I just figured that since you liked the Wonderbolts so much, you wouldn't be mad at me if I became one." Tucker replied nonchalantly.
"Yeah, that isn't going to happen." Rainbow Dash grunted.
"So when do I start?" Tucker asked, turning to Spitfire.
"Well, we never had two ponies at once and we only have one spot." Spitfire said.
"I was here first though so I get it, right?" Rainbow Dash asked, simultaneously excited and nervous.
"I think we should test them both to see who will get to join." Soarin coughed.
"That sounds good. Let's go out and choose some quick tests for them to do." Spitfire said before walking out.
Soarin nodded and quickly followed her out. Rainbow Dash continued glaring at Tucker and he winked at her.
"Ladies first." Tucker said happily, moving out of the way to let her through.
"Don't think I'm going to go easy on you." Rainbow Dash growled before flying after Spitfire.
"Good, I could use a challenge." Tucker laughed, following them.
As Tucker made his way over, he saw Spitfire and Soarin were flying around some rings. They seemed to be setting up the courses for him and Rainbow Dash. After a few minutes, Soarin shot down and landed next to the anxious pair of pegasi.
"Alright, so the first test we are going to have you do is the ring course. All you need to do is go through all the rings, like the name suggests. But there will be a flag for each of you in every ring that you must grab to prove that you flew through each ring. If you miss a single one before going through the last ring you lose by default." Soarin said quickly. "Any questions?"
"Yeah, what are the rules of conduct?" Tucker asked.
"Generally we only ever have one of us at any given time going through the tracks, but Spitfire thought it would be better to have you both go at once." Soarin laughed. "So I would say the only rule is to not kill each other."
"What is the punishment for breaking the rule?" Rainbow Dash asked deadpan.
"Auto-disqualification." Soarin replied seriously.
"Darn." Rainbow Dash muttered as she took off to join Spitfire at the starting line.
Soarin shared a quick look with Tucker. "Okay just out of curiosity, what did you do to her?"
"She may have told me she loved me." Tucker said quietly.
"And then?" Soarin pushed.
"Let's just say I didn't exactly respond in a well thought out manner." Tucker replied nervously, rubbing the back of his neck.
"I almost feel bad for you." Soarin said.
"Don't," Tucker said, now flying towards Spitfire.
"I said almost." Soarin chuckled to himself before following suit.
When Tucker landed on the cloud next to Rainbow Dash, Spitfire nodded and flew next to the first ring.
"There are twenty four rings that you need to pass through. Are you two ready?" Spitfire asked.
Rainbow Dash nodded and leaned forward. She unfurled her wings and quickly glanced at Tucker. Tucker yawned impassively and nodded.
"On my mark..." Spitfire started.
Tucker leaned forward and mimicked Rainbow Dash's position.
"Get set..." Spitfire said with a smile.
Tucker shot his hoof out to shake Rainbow Dash's hoof. Rainbow Dash stared at it and promptly grabbed it.
"Go!" Spitfire yelled.
Rainbow Dash pulled Tucker towards her and kicked him in the jaw. She then turned and started to fly full speed towards the first ring. Tucker quickly gained his footing and set off after her.
"What did he do to her?" Spitfire asked.
"Rainbow Dash said she loved him, he didn't say it back." Soarin replied quickly.
Spitfire looked at Tucker who was rubbing his chin as he flew. "Man, I almost feel bad for him."
"That's what I said." Soarin chuckled.
Rainbow Dash grabbed the first six flags in a matter of seconds, but the rest of the rings were scattered throughout the sky with no direct path to get through all of them. When Tucker grabbed the first set of flags he didn't hesitate to set off through the others. Rainbow Dash looked down and saw Tucker speeding towards her so she started to speed away.
"Listen, can we just talk?" Tucker asked loudly.
"We have nothing to talk about." Rainbow Dash snapped, though she hovered for a moment and allowed Tucker to fly up next to her. She proceeded to kick him in the chest, knocking the wind out of him.
"God dammit." Tucker muttered sourly. He looked down to see Rainbow Dash had already grabbed most of the flags from the rings. Pausing for a brief moment to catch his breath he surged towards the nearest ring and grabbed a flag. When he started towards the next flag a sharp whistling noise was made.
"Rainbow Dash gets one point." Spitfire yelled.
Tucker flew next to Spitfire and dropped his flags next to her.
"Better luck next time." Rainbow Dash smirked.
Tucker stared at Rainbow Dash reservedly and turned to Soarin, who was now standing next to Spitfire. "How many little contests are we going to have exactly?" Tucker asked curiously.
"I can't give you an exact number, all I will say is that we are just getting started." Soarin said.
"Great." Tucker muttered humorlessly.
Rainbow Dash and Tucker were performing challenge after challenge for hours on end, each one proving to be even more difficult than the last. They kept taking turns winning until eventually they were both exhausted. Tucker was black and bluer from his attempts to talk to Rainbow Dash. After the most recent challenge Soarin flew up to Tucker.
"You guys are tied up with eleven points each." Soarin cheered.
"Fantastic." Tucker muttered, stopping on a nearby cloud for a quick breather.
"Let's wrap this up with one final challenge." Spitfire called out before flying in to the building and emerging with a rope.
"How the hell are you going to incorporate bondage in to a challenge?" Tucker asked curiously.
Spitfire smiled and shook her head. "It's for tug-o-war." Soarin laughed.
"I knew that." Tucker said.
"You really need to get your head out of the clouds." Rainbow Dash muttered quietly. “Or wherever else you may have stuck it...”
"Kind of hard to do judging from where we are." Tucker chuckled.
Rainbow Dash punched him in the back of the head but Tucker did nothing in return but shrug it off.
"Okay, the goal is to pull the rope away from the other as fast as you can. This is the final thing you are going to be doing, so all bets are off. Whoever brings the rope to us wins." Soarin called.
"We will be in the main building for when one of you gets it after the challenge has started." Spitfire continued. "Are you two ready?"
Rainbow Dash and Tucker both nodded.
"Great, then let's get this started." Spitfire said. "We'll do this one on a cloud so you have something to stand on. If you take your hooves off the cloud or cross the line you will be disqualified."
"Sounds good to me." Tucker groaned, rubbing his bruises.
"You going to be alright there Tucker?" Soarin asked. "You seem to be pretty bruised up."
"Pft, this shit is nothing. I'll spare you the details of what I do at night." Tucker chortled.
Soarin started to laugh but was cut short by Spitfire shushing him. Spitfire then flew to the cloud Tucker was sitting on and gave him one end. She quickly handed the other end to Rainbow Dash and she carved a line out of the cloud and motioned for Tucker to go to the other side.
"Ready?" Spitfire asked.
"Yeah" Tucker and Rainbow Dash said at the same time.
"Go!" Soarin yelled.
Tucker and Rainbow Dash instantly started pulling on the rope as Soarin and Spitfire made their way back inside the building. They were both exhausted from all the other things they did that day that neither of them could pull with their full strength, leaving them evenly matched. They were at it for a couple minutes before Tucker looked at Rainbow Dash and saw beads of sweat slithering down her face, revealing a harsh glare she was giving to Tucker. "What the fuck am I doing?"
Tucker loosened his grip on the cord and dropped it. Rainbow Dash stared curiously at Tucker and was about to question him.
"Wha-"
"You win." Tucker shrugged.
Tucker slowly flew away to the building on the cloud while Rainbow Dash stared at the rope in her hoof. He edgily walked up to the edge of the cloud and looked down at Ponyville. Rainbow Dash slowly flew behind to Tucker and sat next to him, unsure of what to say.
"Why did you give up?" Rainbow Dash asked quietly after a few minutes of silence.
Tucker shrugged and let out a wistful sigh.
"I guess I remembered that it has been your dream to join them, not mine." Tucker said with a weak laugh. "I just thought that if this is what will make you happy, who am I to get in the way of that?"
Rainbow Dash looked over his bruised body for a moment. She looked up to see Tucker gazing idly at her. Rainbow Dash was trying to think of something to say but she couldn't find the right words. After a few seconds of awkward eye contact, Tucker let out a small cough.
"Listen, I'm not good at this whole apologizing thing. I just want you to know that I know that I was- hell - I am an idiot." Tucker said quietly. "It's just that I've always thought of myself as a love maker, not a love giver and the truth is I didn't ever really think I would, in any way, shape, or form, be in a meaningful relationship. It wasn't that I was scared of the relationship, I was just surprised that you like me for me, and not for what I said about how great I am in bed. I guess what I want to say is I'm sorry. I really do like you, and I mean a lot, and I figured out too late that I kind of just want you to be happy. I even took all the shit you dished out because I guess I sort of do love you. I also want you to know that if you never want to see me again because we're both stubborn as fuck, so I can see you not wanting to talk to me."
Rainbow Dash shook her head and threw herself at him, embracing him. "Sorry, after you said idiot I sort of tuned you out." Rainbow Dash laughed weakly.
"Really? I said all that mushy shit for nothing?" Tucker asked.
"Well, all I really needed to hear was you calling yourself an idiot." Rainbow Dash snickered. "Plus that wasn't exactly mushy stuff you were saying back there. It sounded more like a half-thought-out excuse."
"You are, undeniably, a bitch, you know that?" Tucker muttered.
"You love it." Rainbow Dash quipped.
"Yeah. I guess I do." Tucker said, hugging Rainbow Dash even more tightly.
Rainbow Dash broke the embrace and looked around.
"How about we leave here and go back to my place." Rainbow Dash suggested.
"Bow chicka bow wow?" Tucker asked quickly with a raised brow.
Rainbow Dash laughed and kissed Tucker on his nose. "Before last night, I was thinking about it and felt that you were fourth base material, but now you're back to first." Rainbow Dash answered.
"It better be worth the wait then." Tucker laughed. "But can we make it second base? I feel like my dick receded inside my body in fear of me becoming a woman after that."
"Fine. But you owe me one." Rainbow Dash replied.
"Sounds good to me." Tucker chuckled.
Tucker proceeded to fly back with Rainbow Dash. Soarin and Spitfire emerged out of the building and Soarin poked Spitfire in the ribs.
"I don't want to say I told you he would find a way to talk himself out of it." Soarin whooped. "But I told you so."
"Maybe I should fire you and get them both back." Spitfire murmured.
Soarin started to chuckle but Spitfire just stared at him seriously. "Let's get back to work, shall we?" Soarin gulped.
"That would be the smart thing to do." Spitfire said with a leer.
Spike descended the staircase to see Church flipping through the book with a stern look on his face. "What are you reading Church?" Spike asked quietly.
"A book on magic." Church replied.
"I didn't take you to be the kind of pony that would be in to the whole magic thing." Spike laughed.
"I just figured that I should try and learn how to use this magic stuff, but I just can't seem to be able to wrap my head around it." Church said.
"Oh, okay." Spike said. "Did you ask Twilight for help?"
"No, I'm trying to do this on my own. Plus I'm sure she has a lot of better things to do other than help me." Church replied quietly.
"Nah Twilight loves magic. I'm sure if you asked her she would jump at the chance to teach somepony." Spike chuckled. "She occasionally tries to teach me magic even though I can't do it."
"Maybe I'll ask her later, the stuff I'm reading may be a bit... trivial." Church admitted.
"Why would you say that?" Spike asked curiously.
Church flipped the book to show Spike the cover that read "Magic for Fillies". "Yeah, you're right that might be a little under her league, but I'm still sure she would like to help in some way." Spike said.
"Add the fact that it would be pretty embarrassing admitting that I can't even do the simplest of things." Church added.
"Yeah, I know that feeling of being left out." Spike said weakly.
"You have no idea what being left out is until you are surrounded by people who don't know how to do anything without complaining or fucking up." Church chuckled.
"That's true. And I hope I'll never get to experience that." Spike said with a laugh. "To be honest Church, I'm glad you're here. Before, the only ponies I would ever really talk to were the girls, so it's nice to have somepony that I can talk to about, y'know, stuff."
"I know that feeling, except replace girls with complete idiots." Church said.
Suddenly the door to the library swung open and Twilight walked in and sat next to Spike.
"Where did you go?" Spike asked.
"Fluttershy asked me to go over to her place to check on Grif's leg. She really seems to be worried about him." Twilight said distantly.
"I am too." Church said quietly, then started to laugh. "The entire time I've known him I have never seen him so much as lift a finger to help anybody. I was surprised when we had to go dig him out of that damn forest."
"So how do you guys even know each other?" Spike asked.
"I'll tell you later." Church promised. "I'm going to go back to learning how to do stuff with magic."
"I'd be glad to help you." Twilight said happily. She quickly turned away from Church and rubbed her foreleg as she felt the heat of a blush bloom on her face. "That is, if you want my help."
"I don't know, the book you gave me seems like it would be annoying for you to teach me." Church laughed. "Maybe I'm just an idiot when it comes to magic."
"You can't be expected to learn something new in a couple of minutes." Twilight said reassuringly.
Church simply shrugged and went back to reading. After a few more minutes he closed the book.
"I give up." Church muttered.
"Give me the book, I'll help you." Twilight said.
"Okay, but don't be mad if I can't get it." Church said.
"One of my idols Starswirl the Bearded once said 'a great teacher never gets mad at the student, but gets mad at themselves for they are the ones who failed the student'." Twilight said.
"Sounds like a smart guy." Church said with a swift nod.
"He's probably the smartest unicorn to have ever lived. My life's goal is to achieve what he has achieved in the field of magic and further his research into the unknown." Twilight said passionately.
"Well you're certainly not getting there any faster by stopping to help me." Church said with a laugh.
"He didn't just study twenty-four seven." Twilight said. "He also spent most of his days teaching others how to use and perfect their magical abilities. I would consider it an honor to teach you."
"Fine, you win." Church said, holding the book up. "If you really want to I guess you can-"
Twilight snagged the book from his hooves and opened it to the first page.
"Great, shall we get started?" Twilight asked with excitement.
Church shared a quick glance with Spike before turning back to Twilight, "sure."
"Maybe you should tell him what magic is before teaching him the spells, that might help." Spike suggested.
"Great idea Spike!" Twilight exclaimed before turning her focus to the book. "The first thing you need to know about magic is where it comes from..."
Church closed his eyes for a few seconds and counted to three.
"Have fun, I'm going to grab a bite to eat." Spike said quickly.
"Okay Spike, be careful." Twilight said, not paying attention to what Spike had said.
"Not. Cool." Church mouthed to Spike.
"Magic is an essence that lies dormant in every unicorn and alicorn." Twilight continued. "It continues to remain dormant until the owner focuses on it and tries to make it a reality. It takes an undetermined amount of time for unicorn fillies to find their latent abilities, but when they do, they are prone to have short, uncontrolled bursts of magic. However, since you are a full grown stallion and not a filly, you should be able to control that with little problem. Another thing that you should note is that unicorns are not as potent with magic as alicorns are."
"How much more powerful are we talking here?" Church asked, genuinely intrigued.
"Well take a look at the two princesses." Twilight said. "Celestia raises and sets the sun every day, and her sister Luna- have you met Luna?"
"No, but-"
"Well Luna has the ability to do the same with the moon." Twilight interrupted.
"Wait, really?" Church asked.
Twilight gave a brief nod. "Shall we continue?" Twilight asked.
"Yeah, this is actually starting to sound pretty interesting." Church said honestly.
Spike came out of the kitchen with a yellow gem the size of Church's hoof.
"Where'd Twilight go?" Spike asked after looking around the room.
"She went to her room to grab something." Church answered.
Spike shrugged and took a bite out of the gem and sighed happily as he crunched it to bits.
"What are you eating?" Church asked.
"Quartz." Spike replied through the bits of gem in his mouth.
"Are you supposed to be eating that?" Church asked, raising his brow.
"Totally." Spike muffled through the gem in his mouth. "Dragons are supposed to eat gemstones."
"That is... pretty weird." Church laughed.
"Okay." Twilight said, coming back from her room. "I got a feather from Owlowiscious for you to practice on."
Twilight walked up to the table and put the books to one side and placed the feather in the middle of the table. She turned to Church and nodded slowly.
"So what am I supposed to do?" Church asked.
"Clear your mind. Focus on the feather." Twilight said. "Imagine yourself picking up the feather then try and project those thoughts at it."
"You make it sound easy." Church muddled.
"That's because it is easy, you just have to practice at it." Twilight bolstered.
"Okay." Church closed his eyes and started to push his thoughts to the back of his mind. Once he felt that his mind was sufficiently cleared he opened his eyes and looked at the feather.
"Come on you can do it Church." Twilight said excitedly.
"I'm trying." Church grunted in a strained voice.
"You just have to concentrate." Twilight pushed.
Church's horn started to glow faintly and the feather on the table shifted slightly to the left.
"I think I'm doing it!" Church exclaimed.
Church looked to the left to see Spike sitting on the edge, slowly blowing on the feather.
"Seriously?" Church groaned.
"Well it's just that you were trying so hard with no outcome that I wanted to make you feel like you accomplished something." Spike said.
"Spike!" Twilight yelled.
"Sorry Church." Spike said quickly. "I'm sure you will find your magic ability soon."
"Don't worry about it, I was getting nowhere fast anyways..." Church muttered. Church turned to Twilight and chuckled. "I probably will never get the hang of it anyways."
"Don't think like that, you just have to keep working at it." Twilight said softly.
"Yeah, you can totally do it!" Spike added.
"Thanks, but I think I'll stop trying for now." Church grunted.
Church walked to the other side of the table and looked through the other books. He stopped when he settled upon a book with an odd looking title. He opened it and started slowly flipping through the pages
"What is a draconequus?" Church asked quietly.
"Oh, that's the history book I put there." Twilight explained. "Draconequus are rare creatures - even rarer than alicorns - which have the head of a pony and a body comprised of an assortment of other animal parts."
"Uh huh. And who is Discord?" Church asked.
Spike stared uneasily at Twilight, but Twilight just kept staring at Church.
"Discord is one of Equestria’s greatest enemies. He is extremely powerful and enjoys nothing more than causing trouble." Twilight said quickly. "He is the element of chaos in our world and was once imprisoned in stone by the princesses when they held the Elements of Harmony, but when the Elements shifted in to me and the others, he was freed as the spell weakened. During the time he was free, he caused full-on chaos across Equestria until me and the girls stopped to him and put him back in his stone prison."
"Where is this stone prison of his?" Church asked.
"It is in the Canterlot gardens." Twilight replied. "It is visited regularly and protected by the Royal Guard."
"Can we go see it? I kind of want to see what this thing actually looks like." Church said.
"Maybe some other time." Twilight promised.
"Alright. So what else is there to do around here?" Church asked.
"That depends, what do you like to do?" Twilight asked.
"Not many things." Church laughed. "Maybe I should go check on Caboose."
"I'll come with you, I think I need to speak to Pinkie anyways." Twilight said, trotting up to the door. "Spike do you want to come? We might be able to get you a treat while we're there."
"Sounds awesome to me." Spike said, jumping up onto Twilight’s back. Twilight smiled and opened the door and looked over at Church. Church threw the book back onto the table and walked through the door.
Once they arrived at Sugar Cube Corner, Church went up to the door to open it, but it suddenly swung open to reveal Caboose standing in front of Church with a giant grin on his face. "Hello Church, may I interest you in some cookies?" Caboose yelled.
"Caboose can you use your inside voice please?" Church asked, groaning at the volume.
"I already am inside!" Caboose yelled once again.
Church threw his hoof over Caboose’s mouth and sighed. After a few seconds Church was satisfied that Caboose got the message and lowered his hoof.
"Sorry. I'm just so excited that Pinkie made some cookies that I was on my way to see you to ask you if you wanted any because I made them and they are good for your mouth." Caboose said.
"Sounds good to me." Spike laughed. "Where are they?"
"They are just coming out of the oven." Pinkie called from the kitchen.
"They are just coming out of the oven." Caboose yelled.
"Yeah, I think I got that already." Church said, rubbing his ears, trying to clear them of the verbal assault.
Pinkie came out of the kitchen, balancing a giant tray that was covered with dozens of cookies on her nose.
"They may need to cool down for a few minutes." Pinkie warned. "But once they are cooled they will be all ready to go in our tummies."
"I cannot wait to eat these cookies! They will be amazing!" Caboose said.
"They sure will!" Pinkie giggled.
"Hey Pinkie, can I see you in the kitchen for a minute?" Twilight asked.
"Why, do you want to bake some more cookies?" Pinkie asked.
"No, I just need to talk." Twilight replied.
"Okay." Pinkie said, hopping towards the kitchen.
"You wait here with Church and Caboose." Twilight said to Spike.
"Gladly." Spike said as he stared at the giant plate of cookies. "These look delicious."
"Thank you mister dragon!" Caboose said. "I helped make them."
"Well, here comes the indigestion." Church muttered to himself.
"Alrighty, I can't wait!" Pinkie exclaimed as she hopped out of the kitchen with Twilight.
"Good, now I just have to go tell the others." Twilight said.
"What are you two talking about?" Church asked.
"I'll tell you later." Twilight replied quickly.
"Uh, okay then." Church said quietly.
"Are the cookies cold yet?" Caboose asked.
"I don't know are they?" Pinkie asked in return. In response, Caboose grabbed a couple cookies and tossed them into his mouth and gurgled happily. "I take it they are good." Pinkie giggled.
"Can I have one?" Spike asked.
Pinkie nodded and Spike repeated what Caboose had done.
"Something Caboose cooked didn't kill someone upon ingestion?" Church asked sarcastically.
"You should try one too Church!" Pinkie said happily.
Church opened his mouth to speak, but Pinkie tossed a cookie in to it. Church bit down in to it and was pleasantly surprised.
"This isn't half bad Caboose." Church said.
"What half is it?" Caboose asked through the chewed up cookies in his mouth.
"The good kind." Spike said.
"Are we allowed to be eating these? Shouldn't they be on sale here in the shop?" Church asked.
"Nope. The Cakes decided that they wanted to see if Caboose could bake so they could have more days off." Pinkie said. She grabbed a cookie and quickly ate it. "This was a test and I would say he passed with flying cookies!"
"Yay!" Caboose exclaimed after swallowing the cookies. "This is the first test I passed since kindergarten!"
"Well I think we should be on our way, I need to go talk to the other girls." Twilight said.
"Don't you want a cookie?" Caboose asked.
"No that's quite fine thank y-"
Twilight met Caboose's puppy dog eyes and sighed.
"Okay, I'll have one." Twilight said.
She trotted up to the plate, grabbed one and took a bite out of it.
"Aw, can't I stay and have some more?" Spike asked sadly.
"If Pinkie doesn't mind." Twilight replied.
"No problem Twi! We are going to be making some more treats and we could use a third party." Pinkie said happily.
"What about the other two parties?" Caboose asked.
"Are you coming Church or do you want to stay too?" Twilight asked.
"Since Caboose seems to be staying out of trouble I guess I'll come." Church replied.
"Great." Twilight smiled. "We'll come back and pick Spike up when we're done, okay Pinkie?"
"Okie dokie." Pinkie said.
"So whose place are we going to first?" Church asked.
"Well I already talked to Fluttershy while I was at her place, so I think we should go to Rarity since she’s the closest." Twilight replied.
"Sounds good to me." Church said.
Church and Twilight left Sugar Cube Corner and made their way to the Carousel Boutique. Once they arrived they walked through the door to see Simmons writing on a piece of paper.
"Oh hey Church. Hey Twilight. What are you guys doing here?" Simmons asked without turning to see them.
"I came to talk to Rarity, do you know where she is?" Twilight asked.
"Yeah, she's up in her room." Simmons said.
"Is she working on something?" Twilight asked.
"No, I'm pretty sure she's just resting right now." Simmons answered. "Feel free to go up and see her."
"Thanks." Twilight said, starting towards the stairs.
"So what are you writing?" Church asked.
"Just making some notes." Simmons replied.
"Notes about what?" Church asked curiously.
"Well I have been using a lot of magic recently and I find myself managing to do more and more every day." Simmons said. "I'm trying to find out when I might start reaching my limit so I don't go over it."
"Wait, you can do magic?" Church said in disbelief.
"Yeah, it's really easy and Rarity said that I am making great progress." Simmons laughed.
"Really? I can't even do the simplest of things and you're already well off." Church muttered. "Do you think you could try and teach me?"
"Isn't Twilight supposed to be really good on the magical front?" Simmons asked. "That's what Rarity told me at least."
"Yeah she tried to teach me but we made no progress." Church said.
"Well I'm not exactly a master or anything. Plus I'm not exactly a teacher either." Simmons laughed.
"Couldn't hurt to try though." Church said.
Simmons shrugged and stopped writing on the paper.
"Alright I guess." Simmons said slowly. "The first thing you need to do is clear yo-"
"Clear my mind, Twilight already told me that." Church said. "What next?"
"Do you have a weird feeling in your horn?" Simmons asked.
"Well this is awkward..." Church grunted.
"That's not what I meant." Simmons muttered. "Do you have this heavy feeling on your forehead?"
"Yeah, I thought I was just starting to get a headache though." Church said.
"Well try and push that feeling towards your horn." Simmons started. "Once you feel it building up try to focus on this piece of paper and imagine yourself lifting it up."
Church nodded as Simmons placed a piece of paper on the table. Church stared at the paper and his horn started to glow faintly after a few seconds. Church started grunting as he felt the pressure build up in his horn and his horn started to glow brighter and brighter. Simmons stared slack jawed at Church.
"What are you looking at? It's not moving." Church grunted in a strained voice.
"Turn around." Simmons said quietly.
Church kept his mind on the paper as he turned around. There were dozens of things in the air. Chairs, clothes, drawers, and everything else behind him was surrounded by a light blue glow.
"What's going on?" Twilight asked from the top of the stairs, feeling a large magical presence in the room.
Church lost all focus on the paper and everything fell to the ground. Church suddenly had all the released energy rush back into his head and he fell to the ground in pain.
"Church!" Twilight yelled, running down the stairs. "Are you okay?"
"Holy fuck my head is killing me." Church said, gritting his teeth.
"Just calm down. What did you do?" Twilight asked slowly.
"He asked me to try and show him how to use magic, but his magic seems to have missed the target and hit basically everything else in the room." Simmons said.
"Just like the old days." Church chuckled through the pain that continued to build up. "I think it's getting worse."
"You were lifting a lot of objects." Simmons noted. "I had a migraine for an hour after lifting about ten pounds of letters, and you were lifting possibly over a thousand pounds."
"Hold still." Twilight said.
Twilight slowly lowered her horn to Church's forehead and it started to glow. Twilight made a small grunt and Church felt the pounding in his head significantly lessened.
"What did you do?" Church asked.
"I absorbed some of the pain." Twilight cringed. "I'm used to that feeling after using magic for so long, but you had a lot more of it than I thought. I didn't manage to dissipate the pain completely, but you should be a lot better off now. Simmons do you mind getting me a glass of water?"
"Sure." Simmons said, quickly leaving to get her the drink.
"You didn't have to do that." Church said.
"Nonsense, that's what are friends are for." Twilight chuckled weakly.
"Thanks." Church said quietly. "Are you sure you're going to be okay?"
"Yes, I just need to rest for a few minutes." Twilight said. "After that our next stop is Sweet Apple Acres."
"Sounds good to me." Church said with a smile.
Simmons came back with a glass of water to where Twilight was sitting, which she quickly grabbed from him and promptly took a small sip.
"Thank you very much." Twilight said quietly.
"No problem." Simmons said.
"Simmons, would you be a dear and come up here?" Rarity called from her room.
"Sure." Simmons called back. He turned to Twilight and nodded. "Do you need anything else?"
"No, that's okay." Twilight answered. "Rarity will need a lot of help with what she’s doing."
"Alright then." Simmons said as he made his way up the stairs.
"What exactly is she doing?" Church asked.
"I'll tell you once we're done telling the others." Twilight said happily.
Church decided not to press the matter any further. Twilight suddenly gasped and started to rub her temples.
"Are you sure you're okay?" Church asked with concern.
"I... yes." Twilight said quietly.
Church stared at her until she looked up and gave a weak smile.
"Let's get going. We still have two more stops to make before we’re done." Twilight said, struggling to stand back up. Church helped her regain her footing and she smiled.
"Okay, something went wrong." Church said. "We really should get you to a-"
"I'm fine." Twilight insisted, starting towards the door.
"Okay then..." Church muttered. Church and Twilight made their way to Sweet Apple Acres in total silence, only interrupted by the occasional gasp of pain from Twilight. Church grew more and more concerned every time she gasped, but every time he tried to talk to her she insisted she was fine.
They arrived at the gate to see Big Mac sleeping under a tree with a bit of straw jutting out of his mouth. "Hello Big Mac." Twilight greeted.
"Afternoon." Big Mac yawned.
"Is Applejack around?" Twilight asked.
"Eeyup." Big Mac grunted, looking over at the house.
"Thank you." Twilight said quietly.
Big Mac gave a curt nod and dozed back off. Church followed Twilight up to the door of the house which opened before Twilight had a chance to knock.
"Howdy there youngin's." Granny Smith said. "What kin I do fer ya on this fine day?"
"Hello Mrs. Smith, do you know where Applejack is?" Twilight said.
"She's up in ‘er room, you kin make yer way up the stairs." Granny Smith said.
"Church you stay down here while I go talk to Appleja-" Twilight started, but fell on her front knees and grunted.
Church quickly went by her side and looked her over.
"Is she okay?" Granny Smith asked worriedly. "I'll go git 'er some of mah apple tea."
"Okay, you are not fine." Church preed. "You must have gotten something else from my head."
"I didn't think I di-" Twilight started but saw Church's worried expression. She sighed deeply. "It's just that when you told me about all you've been through I thought maybe I could take some of that pain away too."
"Why would you do that?" Church asked firmly. "What I've been through drove me crazy, what did you think would happen if you tried to take some of that away from me?"
Twilight started to speak but Church's horn started to glow brightly as he placed it on her forehead. Church focused on the pain in her head and took it back and he fell back as the pain came back to him in a sudden rush. Twilight looked at Church who was giving her a hard glare. "Not only was that stupid of you, but it was an invasion of my privacy." Church grunted.
"I'm sorry." Twilight said. "I just wanted to help."
"Next time ask me before you do anything to my mind." Church muttered.
Twilight broke eye contact as Granny Smith came back to the room with a tray that held a single cup on it.
"This should git rid of that there headache right quick." Granny Smith said.
"Thank you for your concern, but I'm feeling better now." Twilight said quietly. "I'll go talk to Applejack."
"Wouldja like some tea, er, what was yer name again?" Granny Smith asked.
"My name's Church." Church said. "And I'm going to have to say no to the tea, but thanks anyways."
"Alrighty, if ya be needin’ anythin' at all, I'll be in the next room over." Granny Smith said.
Church nodded but decided to stay where he was while he waited for Twilight. He felt bad for snapping at Twilight like that because he knew she was only trying to help.
After what seemed to be an hour, Sarge came in to the room from the front door and saw Church. "Blue." Sarge nodded.
"Sarge." Church nodded back.
"What are you doing here?" Sarge asked.
"Twilight needed to talk to all of her friends and she won't tell me why." Church replied.
"I see." Sarge grunted. "And what was with that yelling I heard earlier?"
"You heard that, huh?" Church asked.
"Hard not to." Sarge said.
"Well don't worry about it, I was just angry at nothing." Church said quietly.
"Business as usual for the blues then?" Sarge asked with a small laugh.
"Pretty much." Church replied.
Sarge left the room and made his way up the stairs to see Twilight coming out of Applejack's room.
"Twilight." Sarge said with a nod.
"Hello Sarge." Twilight said quietly.
"You okay?" Sarge asked.
"I think so." Twilight said.
Sarge looked at Twilight and let out a small cough. "I know it's none of my business, but that blue has been through hell and back twice over." Sarge said quietly. "He's still not used to people actually trying to help him rather than kill him - me included - so don't let what he says when he's angry get to you."
"Thank you." Twilight said with a smile.
"Don't mention it." Sarge grunted. "Don't tell him I said that, okay?"
"I have a feeling he wouldn't believe it even if I told him." Twilight said.
"Glad to hear it." Sarge chuckled.
Twilight came back down the stairs and made her way to Church. "We're done here, I just need to stop at Rainbow Dash's place and if you don't want to come with me, I understand." Twilight said.
"No, I'll come." Church said. Twilight nodded and made her way to the door but Church stopped her. "Listen, I'm sorry I talked to you like that, I know you were just trying to ease the pain. You have to understand that I've been living with this shit my entire life and there is a reason it drove me crazy you know. I just don't want to see you to get hurt on my behalf."
"That's okay, I should have asked if it was okay with you before doing it." Twilight laughed weakly.
"So we're good?" Church asked.
"We're good." Twilight nodded. "One more stop then I can tell you what you want to know."
"Alright." Church said as he opened the door.
"Do you think Tucker apologized to Rainbow Dash?" Twilight asked as they made their way past Big Mac.
"Knowing Tucker either of two things have happened. The first one being that he said he was sorry and Rainbow Dash and she forgave him. The second thing being that Rainbow Dash killed him." Church said and followed with chuckle. "And with any luck it is the latter."
"You would think after being teammates for so long you would have made a connection of some kind." Twilight said.
"I've made connections alright, but I can't say any of them are good." Church chuckled.
Twilight and Church arrived at Rainbow Dash's home, where they could hear some talking coming from the inside. "Rainbow Dash, are you up there?" Twilight yelled after a couple of seconds.
After a few seconds Rainbow Dash peered her head through the door and looked down. "Yeah, how's it going Twi?" Rainbow Dash replied.
"It's going well, do you mind if I come up to talk to you in private?" Twilight asked.
"Sure, hang on a sec." Rainbow Dash said before disappearing back inside to talk to Tucker.
"Why do I have to go out there?" Tucker said.
"Because Twilight wants to talk."
"But we just got back." Tucker groaned. "I want some rest after what we've done today."
"I know, I promise I'll make it as quick as possible then you can have your little rest you big baby." Rainbow Dash said with a smile.
Tucker flew out a few seconds later and nodded at Twilight who teleported to the inside of Rainbow Dash's home.
"So you managed to patch things up with her?" Church asked. "That's pretty surprising."
"What can I say? I am the ultimate ladies man after all." Tucker said with a smirk. "Well I guess now that's ponies stallion, but you know what I mean."
"Judging by the black shit, I would’ve guess you've been through a teleporter." Church noted as he saw Tucker's bruised body.
"I guess you’re right." Tucker laughed. "This is nothing though, I've had a lot rougher nights. Did I ever tell you about that one time I-"
"Yeah I really don't want to hear it." Church interrupted quickly.
Tucker and Church fell into a small lapse of silence.
"Any idea what they're talking about up there?" Tucker asked after a few seconds.
"No, Twilight refuses to tell me until she's done up there."
"You're not suspicious?" Tucker asked with surprise.
"Why would I be?"
"Usually you're wary of anything that comes your way."
"I don't know." Church shrugged. "I guess I trust her, though she may have lowered that trust half an hour ago."
"Why is that?"
"Well I managed to use my magic but it sort of backfired and I used too much juice so I started to get a huge fucking migraine. Twilight used her magic to take it away."
"So you don't trust her for that?"
"No, I appreciated what she did. What I didn't really appreciate was the fact that she delved deeper than just the migraine." Church said, lapsing into silence once again.
"So are you just going to stand there or are you actually going to tell me?"
"You know how when I was the Alpha I was forced to go crazy and split into the other fragments?" Church asked, to which Tucker replied with a nod. "Well she tried to take some of that pain away and it started to hurt her so I took it away before it drove her to insanity like it did to me."
"So you trust her slightly less because she wanted to do as much as she could to help you? That's cold dude."
"I don't want her to kill herself on my part." Church muttered.
At that moment Rainbow Dash burst through the door with a terrified expression.
"Church! Tucker! Get up here! Something happened to Twilight." Rainbow Dash yelled before rushing back in.
Tucker started flying up to the house but turned back down to Church.
"Why are you just standing there?" Tucker exclaimed
"I don't know if you've noticed but I don't have any fucking wings."
Tucker groaned and flew back down, picked up Church, and flew up the house as quickly as possible. Tucker dropped Church on the solid floor of the house and they both ran up to Twilight, who was on the ground with a pale face, seemingly devoid of life.
"What happened?" Church asked hurriedly.
"I don't know. We were just talking and she suddenly fell on the floor." Rainbow Dash said quietly.
"I think you might not have gotten all that pain back." Tucker said quietly.
"Is she okay?" Rainbow Dash asked. "She isn't..."
"Don't worry, she's alive." Church said as he felt her heartbeat.
Church stared at Twilight for a few seconds and quickly thought of what he was going to do.
"Hold her still." Church said quietly.
"What are you going to do?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"I'm going in." Church grunted. "I need to find her in there if I am to help her."
"What are you-"
Church suddenly collapsed to the floor and Rainbow Dash started to scream, but soon a faint image of Church was standing over his body.
"What the..." Rainbow Dash gasped in disbelief.
Church turned to Twilight and walked up to her body. He closed his eyes and turned in to a puff of smoke that surrounded Twilight for a couple seconds before being absorbed in to her head. Church reopened his eyes to find himself in a maze of books and other parchments. Without hesitating, Church set off to find Twilight in her mind. He walked for half an hour with no luck, every turn he made seemed to bring him back to where he started. He decided that walking was not going to work so he had to try something else.
"Twilight?" Church yelled.
"Church? Church is that you?" A voice called back, but it wasn't the voice of Twilight, but rather a voice he thought he would never hear again.
Church stumbled back and slammed into a wall of books, his vision dazed as a number of books fell all around him. He concentrated for what seemed like an eternity to regain his footing. Finally he looked back up and with a raspy voice he called out one word, or rather one name. A name that stung him as he said it.
"Tex?"
"Tex?" Church repeated loudly.
This time nobody replied. "Must have just been hearing things." Church muttered.
Church kept walking forward trying to find Twilight.
"Why are you here?" Church heard from a far, placing the voice instantly as Twilight.
"I was hoping you could tell me." Another voice said, this time Church knew he was not hearing things. It was Tex.
"Tex? Twilight? Where are you?" Church yelled, but no answer was given.
Over in the epicenter of Twilight's mind, Tex was standing a few meters away from Twilight. "Are you... Tex?" Twilight asked.
"Yeah, who the hell are you?" Tex asked angrily.
"You're a lot angrier than Church made you out to be." Twilight said quietly.
"Wait, you know Church?" Tex asked with a mixture of her usual anger and confusion.
"Yes he is a new friend." Twilight said. "He told me a lot about you."
"Good things?"
"Not really." Twilight admitted.
"That's the Church I know alright." Tex grunted. "So how did I get here?"
"Well he started suffering a lot of pain in his head, so I went in and took out some of that pain and it seems I also took you along with it."
"How thoughtful." Tex said sarcastically. Tex started to advance on Twilight.
"What are you doing?" Twilight asked nervously.
"Grabbing me a new body." Tex said hollowly.
Church was frozen in place as he listened to the conversation that was happening. Suddenly Church heard a small explosion and a flash of purple further along the path he was taking. He rushed forward and turned to find himself in a large open area where two figures were fighting atop a pile of books. The first figure was Twilight, horn glowing brightly, the other was Tex, who was dodging blasts of magic.
"What the fuck is going on?" Church asked.
Twilight's head snapped to Church. Tex immediately took advantage of the distraction and knocked out Twilight with a punch to the back of her head.
"What the hell are you doing here Tex?" Church had still not fully grasped what was happening before him when Tex turned to him and stared at him silently for the briefest of moments.
"Is that you Church?" Tex asked with a tone of surprise. "Can't say much for your new body. But it's good to see you again."
"I can't say the same. What the hell did you do to her?"
"I knocked her out. I plan on taking control of her body, it seems to be more powerful than mine."
Tex slowly started to walk towards Twilight but Church stepped in front of her.
"That isn't fair Tex, you know that." Church grunted.
"Screw fair. I have a chance to get a new body and I'm going to take it." Tex chuckled. Tex turned to Twilight and started to make her way towards her. "I just need to take her out of the picture."
Church threw his body at Tex and tackled her to the ground.
"I can't let you do this Tex." Church grunted as he pinned her to the ground.
"Oh? And what are you going to do to stop me?" Tex said before throwing Church off of her.
Church slammed in to another wall of books and fell to the ground. He quickly got up to see Tex's hand around Twilight's neck. Tex suddenly got surrounded by a light blue cloak and flew in to a wall.
"I'm not going to let you kill her." Church muttered.
"You aren't much of a fighter Church, do you honestly think you can beat me?" Tex laughed.
"No, but I can sure as hell try." Church exclaimed.
Church charged at Tex with the intent of knocking her to the ground. Tex tried to dive to the side, but Church still managed to clip her, knocking her down for a brief moment. Twilight slowly opened her eyes, but did not move. Instead she stared silently at the pair.
"You're really trying to stop me for her?" Tex asked with mild surprise. "And here I thought that you loved me."
"So far she's been better to me than you ever have." Church said quietly as he stared at Twilight, then he turned to Tex and rose his voice. "I choose for her to be my friend, I didn't choose to love you. I’ve finally discovered our love for what it is. Mechanical, surreal. Something fabricated, not earned and you knew that, that's why you refused to love me back."
Church lunged at Tex again, but Tex was even faster this time. She grabbed his horn and kneed him in the throat. Church made a vicious choking sound but Tex did not let up. She continued hitting him in the throat until she was satisfied he would not get up.
"Maybe taking you out of the picture would be the best way to move on." Tex said thoughtfully.
"What do you mean by that? Are you going to kill me?" Church scoffed. "You'll just end up killing yourself."
Tex did not reply, but rather stared at him, presumably glaring at him.
"Now I'm going to give you two options here. The first one being that you try to walk over to Twilight and I will do all in my power to stop you which will probably end in me being killed, which in turn will probably kill you."
"But do you know for sure?" Tex challenged.
"Would you really want to risk it?"
"What's the second option."
"The second option is that you come back in my head where you survive to some degree and I will live with it."
"Those options don't really seem fair."
"Like you said, screw fair. What's it going to be Tex?"
"You're a lot different than I remember." Tex said quietly. "Have it your way, I'll give you this one as a favor but you owe me one thing in return."
"Name it." Church replied firmly.
"Hit that yellow asshat in the balls for me." Tex said instantly.
"What is your problem with his balls?" Church said, covering a slight chuckle.
"He just pisses me off."
"That's understandable." Church nodded thoughtfully. "Deal."
Outside of Twilight's body, Rainbow Dash was staring silently at Church, still trying to comprehend what had just happened. Twilight's eyes then snapped open and she groaned lightly.
"Thank Celestia you're alright." Rainbow Dash said happily.
Twilight's eyes drifted over to where Church was laying. Before Twilight could ask any questions Church appeared next to her and went back in to his own body.
"What are you?" Rainbow Dash asked quietly.
"Want the long answer or the short answer?" Church asked.
"I think the short one should be good for now." Twilight said.
"I'm a mother-fucking ghost." Church said with a shrug.
"You're... a ghost?" Rainbow Dash asked skeptically.
"No, that's just the easy way of explaining it." Church replied.
"So what did you do then?"
"Do you really want to know or are you just thinking out loud?"
"A little bit from column a, a little bit from column b."
"Then I'll just leave it as I solved the problem." Church said more harshly than he meant to. "Not much use going into any further detail."
"Okay then. I didn't mean to offend you or anything so..." Rainbow Dash said.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to make it sound that way." Church said slowly.
"Don't worry, Church is always angry." Tucker said. "Like when he is happy he is slightly less angry than usual. And when he is mildly annoyed he becomes this sort of mopey angry."
"Fuck you. I'm not always angry." Church grunted.
"See?" Tucker chuckled. "Mopey angry, right on cue."
Church glared at Tucker for a few seconds before Twilight walked in front of him. "Let's teleport back to Sugar Cube Corner and pick up Spike." Twilight said. "We'll walk the rest of the way back to the library and we can relax."
"Mind doing that for me too?" Church asked quickly. "I don't know if you've noticed, but my aim isn't the greatest and I would appreciate not ending up halfway through a wall." Twilight nodded and closed her eyes. Her horn glowed briefly and they reappeared in front of Sugar Cube Corner. "Thanks for getting me out of there." Church muttered. "Tucker was starting to get on my nerves."
"I'm beginning to see why you two have a strained relationship." Twilight said.
"Good to know I'm not just imagining it." Church chuckled.
Twilight knocked on the door and Pinkie opened it with a big smile. "Heya Twilight!"
"Hey Pinkie, we're here to pick up Spike then we'll be out of your hair."
"You would have to be in my hair to get out of it first silly." Pinkie giggled. "Come on in." Twilight nodded and went in to the room being followed by Church.
Church looked across the room and saw Caboose laying on the ground with a trail of crumbs around him. Church smiled loosely but quickly shook it off.
"Where is Spike?" Twilight asked.
"He was here a few seconds ago." Pinkie said with mild confusion.
Before Twilight could call his name, they saw a small purple arm shoot out from under Caboose and wave violently. Church ran up to Caboose and pulled Spike out from under Caboose. "Thank... you..." Spike gasped.
"How the hell did you get under him?" Church asked.
"Well there was one cookie left and both of us wanted it so we kind of tried to take it from each other."
"You know he is way bigger than you, right?" Church said, raising an eyebrow
"Yeah but the cookie looked so good." Spike said, rubbing his belly.
"I'll take your word for it." Church broke into a smile.
"Can we go back home now?" Spike yawned. "I'm feeling really tired."
Twilight nodded and walked up to Spike who quickly jumped on her back.
"Thanks for looking after him Pinkie."
"No problemo Twi!" Pinkie said. "I should probably get Boosey up too."
"Keep him out of trouble." Church said.
"Caboose could never cause trouble, just look at him." Pinkie said innocently.
Church looked over at Caboose who gurgled happily as more crumbs fell off of his chest.
"You're right, there is no way he could cause trouble." Church said sarcastically.
"We should get going, we need to give Spike some rest."
"But it's the middle of the day." Spike said quietly.
"Alrighty." Pinkie said. "Come on Boosey, wake up."
"But the ground is so comfy." Caboose yawned.
Once Twilight, Church and Spike made their way back to the library, Twilight brought Spike to her room where he quickly dozed off. She came back downstairs to see Church sitting at the table, rubbing the back of his neck.
"Spike must have been really tired, he fell asleep right when I put him to bed." Twilight said quietly.
"He had a lot of sugar back there so he's probably just having a sugar crash." Church said quietly as he continued rubbing his neck.
"Probably." Twilight said quietly. "Church I just want to say thank you for doing what you did."
"Don't mention it." Church grunted dismissively.
"No, I do need to mention it. I can't even begin to comprehend how much it must hurt you to have done that."
"You know, even though that I haven't known you for long, I already see you as more of a friend than anybody else I've met. I'm not going to let her kill the only person that I can actually talk to without having to explain every damn thing as slowly as I can, because that would leave me with Caboose and Tucker again and that would fucking suck."
"Well I'm glad you feel that way." Twilight said.
"So, uh, do you mind telling me what you were going to the others places for?" Church asked.
"Oh right, I nearly forgot." Twilight said. "My brother is getting married soon and I was wondering if you would want to come. It might even be a good thing to do given all that's happened in the past little while. It’ll allow us to unwind a little bit."
Church shrugged slowly. "Weddings aren't exactly my thing."
"Come on, what isn't there to love about weddings?" Twilight asked. "There's music, good friends, great food, fu-"
"Tex and I were supposed to get married." Church interrupted quietly.
"Sorry I didn't mean to bring her up." Twilight said with a frown.
"I know." Church sighed. "I just wish I knew why forgetting her isn't an option."
"Well you are the aspect of... the Alpha was it, that used to be his memory." Twilight said with a small laugh. "I can imagine it being difficult to forget things when that is who you are."
"Yeah." Church replied simply. "Who is he getting married to?"
"Kind of a silly question when you barely know anypony in this world." Twilight chuckled lightly.
"That's true." Church chuckled with her.
"Her name is Princess Mi Adore Cadenza." Twilight said.
"Have you met her before?"
"No, this is the first time I've heard of her."
"Aren't you a little mad that you never even got to meet his fiance before he decided to marry her?"
"A bit." Twilight admitted. "But it's going to be a royal wedding."
"That sort of sounds like it would be a big deal."
"It is." Twilight agreed. "It has been quite a while since there has been a royal wedding and I'm glad to be a part of it."
"I know your brother is the one getting married, but what do you mean by a part of it?" Church asked.
"Me and the other girls are going to be bridesmaids. That's what I went to go talk to them about. So are you interested in coming?"
"Sounds good. Beats sitting around all day."
"Great." Twilight said happily. "I assume the girls will ask the others as well."
Church paused and shivered violently.
"What is it Church?" Twilight asked.
"I don't know, I just have a bad feeling about it." Church said.
Applejack came out of her room to see Sarge chuckling as Twilight made her way down the stairs.
"What were ya talkin' ta Twilight about?"
"Nothing." Sarge said.
"Sarge d'ya mind if we have a lil talk?"
"Sure. You admitting defeat in our little competition?"
"Ya hafta be not right in the head if ya think I'd give up that easily." Applejack laughed. "Ah was just wonderin' if ya would like to come to a weddin'. Sarge fell to the ground and burst out with laughter. "What's so funny 'bout it?" Applejack asked.
"Did you just ask me to go to a wedding?" Sarge said through the laughter.
"Yeah, ah did."
"And you want me to go to this wedding... with the blues?"
"Yes." Applejack grunted.
"Hold that thought." Sarge said, stifling his laughter. He walked out of the room and into the hallway and burst out with laughter for a second time.
"If ya don't go ah'm afraid that that means ya chickened out n' ah'll get another point in our lil competition." Applejack called out smugly, stopping Sarge's laughter completely.
"I'm not afraid to go." Sarge muttered as he walked back in to the room.
"Ya gunna prove it, or ya just gunna be all talk?" Applejack asked with a smirk.
"Well played." Sarge grunted. "I'm sure as hell not going to give up that easily."
"Ah knew ya wouldn't. Now let's git on down to Rarity's store so we kin getcha a suitable, er, suit."
"You want me to wear a damned monkey suit?" Sarge laughed. "What’s next? Do you want me to treat the blues with respect too?"
"Ah do."
Sarge stared at Applejack silently. "Torture doesn't seem to be one of your pastimes, so why do you want me to go to this wedding?"
"Twilight is mah friend. Ah wanna support Twilight as well as her family."
"Doesn't explain why I have to go..." Sarge grunted
"Ya mean besides the fact that ah'd git a point?" Applejack laughed. "Ya never know. Ya could end up havin' some fun."
"Right. Why can't that Rarity pony just free ball the suit? Isn't she a professional or something?"
"Yeah, she is. Twilight told me that Rarity requested you to come personally. Somethin' 'bout ya havin' a different build than the others or somethin' along those lines."
Sarge mumbled as he thought through his options. On one side he would lose a point because he didn't go. On the other side he would have to wear a suit and be nice to the blues. He shuddered at that final thought and let out a disgruntled sigh.
"Well? What's it gunna be?" Applejack asked.
"It's a lose lose situation for me, isn't it?" Sarge muttered. "Fine, let's just get it over with."
"Glad t' hear it." Applejack smiled as she walked to the door.
Applejack led a reluctant Sarge to the Carousel Boutique, simply walking in once they arrived. "Rarity, are ya in here?" Applejack called out.
"Yes Applejack dear, did you bring Sarge like I asked?' Rarity asked as she emerged from her room.
"Yea, ah did."
"Excellent, come this way Sarge, and Simmons will take your measurements. Applejack you may stay down here on the couch as there is really not much more room up there but we will call you when Sarge is finished."
Applejack and Sarge both nodded as Applejack went to sit down on the couch. Sarge went in to Rarity's room where Simmons was standing next to a small stand.
"Hey Sarge." Simmons greeted.
"Simmons." Sarge nodded.
"Sarge if you wouldn't mind stepping on the stand next to Simmons we can get started." Rarity said as she grabbed some black hoof-finished wool.
"How long is this going to take?" Sarge asked as he stepped onto the stand.
"Just a couple of hours. Your build is far larger than most stallions that I have made suits for, so it may take a bit longer than usual."
"So I have to stand still for a couple hours?" Sarge asked flatly.
"Simmons will hold you in place using magic so you do not get tired." Rarity explained as she went to another table to grab a needle.
"What will I during that time? Stare at a wall?" Sarge laughed.
"Sarge why don't you use this time to think of more demeaning things to say to Grif?" Simmons asked as he started measuring Sarge.
"Good thinking Simmons." Sarge replied with a chuckle. "Alright. Demeaning, demeaning. How about Grif you're a lazy son of a bitch and I think you'd look better ten feet under?"
"That is a good one Sarge." Simmons said.
"Are we done yet?"
"I'm not even done measuring you yet." Simmons said quietly.
"Great! More time to think of things to say to Grif!" Sarge laughed.
Sarge continued rambling about Grif being an idiot as Rarity set to work on the suit and Simmons started to hold Sarge in place. Over the next two hours, Rarity got a new appreciation for the contempt which Sarge held for Grif. The amount of one-liners he came up with was astounding, though very few of them were actually all that impressive.
"...you are so stupid that you make me feel dumber by just being near you! How about that one?"
"Another good one Sarge." Simmons said.
"Aaaand... done." Rarity said, backing away from Sarge. "Go get Applejack and I will get the mirror."
Simmons nodded and brought Applejack up to the room where Sarge was standing in his newly-made black suit.
"Lookin' good Sarge." Applejack laughed.
Rarity pushed a mirror in front of Sarge and he smiled tightly.
"I am, aren't I?" Sarge chuckled as he looked himself over in the mirror. "But us reds look good in anything, so that's not much of a surprise."
"Donut would have said the same sir." Simmons said.
"Yeah he would have, wouldn't he?" Sarge grunted.
"So how will you be paying for this?" Rarity asked.
"Uh, what do y-"
"I am just joking." Rarity said. "The suit is free of charge."
"That's awfully generous of you." Sarge said.
"It's just who I am darling. Now if you take off the suit I will stow it away so it does not get ripped."
Sarge nodded and freed himself from the suit. They said their goodbyes and Sarge and Applejack made their way back to the farm.
"So how'dya like the suit?" Applejack asked.
"It's good I guess." Sarge grunted. "I'm just glad I have more material to use on Grif."
"I'm sure you're just overreacting." Twilight said.
"It wouldn't be the first time." Church chuckled. He then got off the chair and made his way over to the door. "Now that that's settled..."
"Where are you going?" Twilight asked.
"It would be better if you didn't know." Church laughed. "Which way is Fluttershy's place again? I need to pay her a quick visit."
"Well we just got back, but I can just take you there you want."
"No, that's okay just some directions would be great if you wouldn't mind." Church said. "I need to talk to Grif in a completely respectful and tolerant manner."
Twilight knew what he was going there to do. She had been conscious when Tex made the request, but she gave the directions to Church anyways. Over at Fluttershy's cottage Grif was looking around for Fluttershy who seemed to be missing.
"Fluttershy where are you?" Grif asked. "You can't still be feeling bad about me being part tree. Twilight said I was fine, remember?"
Grif got no answer from Fluttershy. Instead, Angel came down the stairs and stood in front of him, tapping his foot.
"Hey buddy, do you know where she is?"
Angel continued tapping his foot but waved his paws in front of his face.
"I'm not following." Grif grunted. "Is she here or not?" Angel facepawed and pretended to write on a piece of paper, then made a folding motion. Angel followed that up by making an opening motion, followed by placing the invisible paper in it. Angel then licked the air and pressed his paws together.
"Yeah I still don't get it. All I'm getting is she is licking something and I don't think I want to know the details." Angel gave a small sigh and tapped his arm.
"Something to do with time?" Angel smiled and nodded quickly. Angel made a rectangle shape and made a flat v shape in that rectangle.
"Um. Envelope?" Angel smiled wildly and started some other motion.
However, Grif lost all focus as someone knocked on the door. He opened it slowly to see Church standing there with a look that was a mix of guilt and glee.
"Hi Church... what are you doing here?" Grif asked nervously.
"Apologizing in advance."
"Apologizing in advance for what?" Instead of receiving a reply, Grif received a quick kick to the balls.
"Son of a bitch!" Grif cried as he fell to the ground cradling his crotch.
"Sorry, just had a favor that I had to settle." Church shrugged.
"Fuck you!" Grif yelled weakly. "You could have at least fucking warned me. God damn it."
"Nothing can prepare you for a nut shot. You should know that already after, well, you kn-"
"Fucking hell." Grif muttered as he shakily rose off the floor. "I guess you're right, but still. Who the fuck wanted you to kick me in the balls?"
"Don't worry about it." Church said. "Where is Fluttershy?"
"I don't know, she has been acting weird ever since Twilight came by earlier." Grif coughed.
"So she didn't invite you yet?"
"No, invite me to what?" Grif asked idly.
"Twilight's brother is getting married to some princess or another and the girls have been invited. I think the girls are supposed to invite us individually or something."
"Why would she not just tell me?"
"Beats me. Maybe it's some sort of custom in this place. It's also possible she just doesn't want to go to the wedding with you because you're a lazy sack of shit."
"Fuck you." Grif said, turning to limp away. "Now if you don't mind I need to go find something cold."
"Get better soon." Church chuckled as he closed the door to Fluttershy's cottage before making his way back towards Twilight's home.
"I'll get you back for that, you asshole." Grif muttered under his breath. He turned to Angel who was watching him curiously. "You could have just told me that."
Angel gave an unimpressed look and hopped up the stairs. Grif limped to the kitchen and started looking for something to ease the pain. "Where does she keep some damn painkillers?"
Grif heard hooves on wood. He looked out of the kitchen to see Fluttershy slowly walking down the stairs.
"Hey Fluttershy, do you have something to make me feel as if I haven't been run over by a train?"
Fluttershy nearly jumped out of her skin when Grif talked. She looked Grif over and saw that he was cringing. She nodded quickly and made her way to the kitchen and started looking through the cabinets.
"Thanks. This feels worse than the damn infection." Grif laughed.
"What happened?" Fluttershy asked without turning.
"Church stopped by and gave me a nice gift." Grif muttered sarcastically.
Fluttershy was about to question him on the matter but put two and two together, so she simply continued looking.
"So what was this about an invitation to a wedding?" Grif asked. "Church mentioned it and said that-"
Fluttershy's cheeks went a deep shade of crimson red and she continued looking through drawers with haste. This made Grif lose his train of thought and he stared at Fluttershy quietly. "Did I piss you off or something?"
"No it's not that." Fluttershy peeped as she opened a cabinet.
"You're confusing me a bit here. First you treat me awesomely after I saved your bunny, now I feel like you're ignoring me. What's the deal?"
Fluttershy gave no reply and avoided eye contact.
"Do you hate me or something?"
"No... it's just I've never invited any stallion to do anything with me." Fluttershy said, shrinking her appearance. "I was embarrassed."
"And?" Grif pushed lightly.
"Well I didn't want to put you in any situation you would not feel comfortable in either."
"We're friends or something, right?" Fluttershy nodded slowly. "Then yeah, you shouldn't think of this as a date or whatever you're thinking of this as. Treat it like it's just you asking any of your other friends to hang out."
"Okay. Here goes nothing." Fluttershy gulped. "Um, Grif? I was just wondering... if you would like, that is if you don't mind, to... come with me to a wedding?"
"Nah. I'm good." Grif said quickly.
"Oh." Fluttershy said sadly. "Okay... sorry for bothering you."
"That was a joke." Grif said. "Think there will be good food there?"
"I would think so."
"Then I'll go." Grif laughed.
"Really?" Fluttershy asked with a big smile.
"Yeah. You haven't tried to kill me yet so I'd say I owe you one." Grif smiled.
"Thank you so much." Fluttershy said.
Fluttershy gave some painkillers and hugged Grif tightly. She then trotted happily back to her room.
"You're... welcome?" Grif said quietly. "That was fucking weird."
Everypony had gathered and boarded the train to make their way to Canterlot just hours after the sun had risen the next morning.
"A sonic rainboom. At a wedding." Rainbow Dash said slowly. "Can you say best wedding ever?"
"Best wedding ever!" Caboose and Pinkie yelled in unison.
"So you all get to help with a big fancy wedding, but I'm the one that gets to host the bachelor party." Spike said smugly. "I have one question. What's a bachelor party?"
Everypony laughed at Spike. Everypony except for Tucker who had a wide smile on his face.
"Bachelor parties are probably the coolest kind of parties you can go to." Tucker laughed.
"Really?" Spike asked. "Do you think you could tell me more about them."
"Fuck yeah little dude." Tucker laughed.
Church walked up to Applejack and coughed lightly.
"Hey there Church. What kin ah do ya for?" Applejack asked with a wide smile.
"Twilight seems a little dejected." Church said quietly. Applejack looked over to where Twilight was gazing out the window. "Do you think you can talk to her?"
"Ah think ah kin do that." Applejack nodded. Applejack and Church slowly walked up to Twilight who was sitting completely still as she gazed out the window sorrowfully. "And why th' long face sugarcube?" Applejack asked.
"I'm just thinking about Shining Armor." Twilight said sadly. "Ever since I moved to Ponyville we've been seeing each other less and less. And now that he's starting a new family with this Princess Mi Amore Cal-whatshername we'll probably never see each other."
"Come on now, yer his sister. He'll always make time for ya."
"He couldn't seem to make time to tell me he was getting married." Twilight said angrily as she closed the blinds on the window with her magic.
"Relationships can be stressful, try not to hold it against him." Church said.
Twilight nodded but said nothing as the train rounded a corner to be faced with Canterlot.
"We're here! We're here!" Pinkie exclaimed with joy.
"Are we there yet?" Caboose asked.
Before anypony answered the train passed through a large pink bubble and everypony suddenly froze, shocked by the sensation.
"What the hell was that?" Grif asked quietly.
Nopony answered as they had all been thinking the same thing. The train stopped at the station and the doors shot open. Applejack and Rainbow Dash peered their heads out of the cart and looked around.
"Woah. What's with all the guards?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"They're probably just taking necessary precautions." Simmons said. "This wedding is sounding like it is kind of a big deal."
"Royal weddings do bring about the strangest ponies." Rarity agreed.
Pinkie started to inhaled sharply, as if startled, and everypony turned to Pinkie. Pinkie sneezed loudly as streamers and confetti shot out of her nose. She smiled and trotted off the train happily as everypony continued to stare at her.
"Now let's get going." Rarity said, starting to walk with Pinkie. "We have work to do."
"An' you've got a big brother t' go congratulate" Applejack said to Twilight.
"Yeah. Congratulate." Twilight muttered as she walked past the Royal Guard. "And then give him a piece of my mind."
Everypony stared curiously at her as she kept walking.
"What's with her?" Tucker asked.
"She's just a little pissed that her brother didn't see her in person about the wedding." Church explained. "Let's go, you girls have work to do."
Twilight trotted quickly towards the barracks, where a white stallion adorned with the purple embroidered armor of a Captain of the Royal Guard was directing his subordinates.
"I've got something to say to you mister." Twilight exclaimed.
The Royal Guards nearest to the wall rushed up to it and placed spears in a defensive position, prepared to attack the interloper. The white stallion peered over the wall, took off his helmet and smiled.
"Twily! I missed you kid. How was the train ride?" Shining Armor exclaimed with happiness. "I-"
"How dare you not tell me in person that you were getting married!" Twilight said abrasively. "I'm your sister for pony’s sake!" Twilight turned her head to avoid eye contact with her brother.
"It's not my fault. Princess Celestia has requested a major increase in security. Didn't you see all the guards at the train station?" Shining Armor asked.
"Yeah, there's a big wedding coming up." Twilight said, trotting away from her brother. "Maybe you've heard about it?"
"It has nothing to do with the wedding. A threat has been made against Canterlot. We don't know who is responsible for it, but Princess Celestia asked that I help provide additional protection." Shining Armor explained. He raised Twilight's chin with his hoof and smiled. "This you need to see."
Shining Armor slowly backed up and his horn started glowing extremely brightly. A beam shot out of his horn and up to the bright bubble. When it made contact with the bubble, it pulsated a couple times as the pink darkened in a wave across the surface, and Shining Armor rubbed the side of his head in pain. "The burden of keeping Canterlot safe rests squarely on my shoulders. Staying focused on the task at hand has been my top priority."
"Okay okay I get it. you've got a really important job protecting all of Canterlot with a force field only you can conjure up. But still, how could you not tell me about something as big as your wedding?" Twilight asked sadly as she followed Shining Armor up onto a bridge overlooking the courtyard. She turned to him slowly with a frown on her face. "Am I not that important to you anymore?"
"Hey, you're my little sister. Of course you're important to me." Shining Armor said, putting his hoof on Twilight. He turned away and smiled coyly. "But I would understand if you didn't want to be my best mare now."
"You want me to be your best mare?" Twilight asked excitedly.
"Well, yeah."
"I would be honored." Twilight said happily.
Shining Armor walked up to Twilight and hugged her.
"But I'm still pretty ticked that you're marrying somepony I don't even know." Twilight said, quickly pushing him back at arm’s length. "When did you even meet this Princess Mi Amore Cadenza?"
"Twily... Princess Mi Amore Cadenza is Cadance, your old foal sitter."
"Cadance? As in the Cadance?" Twilight asked. She shook her head and looked at Shining Armor. "As in the greatest foal sitter in the history of all foal sitters?"
"You tell me." Shining Armor chuckled. "She was your foal sitter."
"Oh my gosh, oh my gosh! Cadance is only the most amazing pony ever!" Twilight said. "She's beautiful, she's caring, she's kind..."
Her mind drifted to a fond memory of their time together.
"I am so lucky to have you as my foal sitter." Young Twilight said as she was sitting on a swing.
"I'm the lucky one Twilight." Cadance said as she pushed the swing.
"Ha. You're a princess. I'm just a regular old unicorn."
"You are anything but a regular old unicorn." Cadance said, taking Twilight off of the swing.
"Sunshine, sunshine, ladybugs awake." They chanted in unison. "Clap your hooves and do a little shake."
They both fell back with laughter and Twilight drifted off in to a different memory where a couple were yelling at each other. Cadance shared a glance with Twilight before using her magic to make the couple stop arguing and make up.
"How many unicorns can just spread love wherever they go? I only know of one and you're marrying her!" Twilight exclaimed, snapping out of her reverie. She started jumping around her brother. "You're marrying Cadance, you're marrying Cadance, you're marryin-"
Twilight stopped in surprise at the sight of a pink alicorn. She immediately recognized her as Cadance, who was currently glaring at the siblings.
"I hope I'm not interrupting anything important." Cadance muttered.
"Cadance!" Twilight exclaimed. She hopped in front of her old friend and smiled. "Sunshine, sunshine, ladybugs awake. Clap your hooves and do a little shake."
"What are you doing?" Cadance asked flatly.
"Cadance it's me. Twilight."
"Uh-huh." Cadance grunted. She walked past Twilight and up to Shining Armor who put his leg around her neck.
"I've got to get back to my station, but Cadance will be checking with all of you to see how things are going. I think I speak for both of us when I say we couldn't be more excited to have you here. Right dear?"
"Absolutely." Cadance said with a malicious look.
Twilight stared at Cadance with a confused look.
"Well, we'll let you get to it." Shining Armor said as he walked away with Cadance.
Twilight was sitting in the bakery with Applejack who was checking each of the stations ensuring that everything was in order. Twilight had a scowl on her face as her mind was preoccupied with the thought of Cadance.
"Cake." Applejack grunted after she put a final touch of icing on the top. "Check."
Twilight checked a box but kept the scowl on her face.
"Ice sculpture. Check."
Twilight checked another box and sank down.
"Best darned bite sized apple fritters ya ever tasted?" Applejack asked, stuffing one of the treats into Twilight's mouth.
"Mmm. Check." Twilight said happily, checking off another box. "Say, where is Sarge?"
"I think he went with th' other guys t' prepare for your brother’s party."
"Speaking of that. Spike why aren't you preparing the bachelor party?"
Twilight turned to Spike who was sitting with the two wedding cake toppers, using them like toys.
"I do, do you?" Spike said, imitating Shining Armors voice while holding. "I do. Mwuah!"
Twilight took the two wedding cake toppers away from Spike and glared at him.
"Tucker said that he would do it." Spike laughed innocently as Cadance walked in to the room.
"Hiya Princess!" Applejack greeted with a curtsey.
"Please, call me Princess Mi Amore Cadenza." Cadance insisted.
"Hiya Princess Mi Amore Cadenza." Applejack repeated. "Ya come t' check out what's on the menu for your big day?"
"I have." Cadance said with a smile, but turned it in to a scowl as Applejack turned around.
Applejack held up a platter with the fritters on them to Cadance, who took a small bite out of one of them and placed it back on the platter.
"Delicious. I love, love, love them." Cadance said with a forced tone.
"Aw shucks, why doncha take a few t' go?" Applejack asked as she held up a brown bag.
Cadance reluctantly brought the bag up to her mouth with magic and started to walk away.
"I know how ya brides kin be." Applejack said. "So busy ya ferget to get a little somethin' in yer belly."
Cadance threw the bag in to the trash when Applejack turned around and walked out the door.
"Did you see what she..." Twilight trailed off but Applejack stared at her blankly.
Twilight shook her head and made her way to where Rarity was putting the finishing touches on the wedding gown with Simmons’ help.
"I cannot believe her." Twilight vented to the pair.
"She couldn't have been that bad." Simmons said as he fiddled with the suit he was finishing up.
"Oh you should have seen how she acted back there. I don't know when she changed, but she changed." Twilight said as she stomped her hoof to the ground. She brought her hoof up to her throat and started imitating Cadance. "Please, call me Princess Mi Amore Cadenza."
"Did I hear someone say my name?" Cadance said as she entered the room with her three bridesmaids.
"Your highness!" Rarity exclaimed. She ran in front of Cadance and bowed. "Let me just start by saying what it is an honor to play a role in such a momentous occasion."
"Uh-huh. Is my dress ready?"
"Oh, uh i- yes. Of course. My friend and I have been working on it ever since we were given the assignment. And I think you will be pleased with the results."
"I was hoping for something with more beading and a longer train." Cadance huffed with barely a moment’s hesitation.
"Oh. Yes. Of course." Rarity said, taking out a notepad and quill.
"And those should be a different color."
Rarity nodded hesitantly and wrote on her notepad.
"I think they're lovely." One bridesmaid said, the others quickly chimed in with their agreements.
Cadance glared at her bridesmaids and they quickly broke eye contact.
"Make them a different color." Cadance ordered before leaving the room
"Gee, maybe her name should be Princess Demandy Pants." Twilight muttered before leaving to check up on Pinkie.
"I thought we did well." Simmons said quietly to Rarity after Twilight left.
"You did Simmons, I'm afraid I was being too stingy with the dress. Instead of making it great we had to make it perfect. This is her big day after all and she should not settle for second best."
"She still could have said it was nice..." Simmons muttered.
"She is probably extremely stressed." Rarity insisted. "At least the suits for you and the other boys came out well."
"Yeah. I'm glad I finally found someone I can actually work with and not for." Simmons said happily.
"Shall we work on the dress now? After we're done you could go to that bachelor party that the boys are throwing, I'm sure they would be glad to see you." Simmons nodded quickly.
Over in the mess hall, Cadance was standing with Pinkie to make sure the festivities were meeting expectations.
"Okay, let's see. We've been over the games." Pinkie said.
Caboose grabbed the dice and threw them on the ground. Cadance gave an unimpressed look to Caboose.
"The dances." Pinkie said, dancing to the polka music. "I think this reception is going to be perfect, don't you?"
"Perfect if we were celebrating a six year old's birthday party." Cadance muttered.
"I am way older than six!" Caboose exclaimed.
Cadance rolled her eyes and started to leave the room.
"Thank you." Pinkie said happily.
It was nearly the end of the day when the girls got together to talk about their preparations.
"Bet I know what you're all thinking." Twilight said as she walked over to the table with her drink. "Cadance is the absolute worst bride to be ever."
All the girls turned to her with a look of bewilderment. "Who me?" Spike mimicked as he held up the Cadance topper.
"Spike. That goes on th' cake." Applejack said.
Spike pushed the topper on to the table and laughed innocently yet again.
"Twilight what ever are you talking about? Cadance is an absolute gem." Rarity said happily
"Rarity, she was so demanding" Twilight pushed.
"Of course she was. Why shouldn't she expect the very best on her wedding day?" Rarity asked.
"Applejack did you know after she told you she just loved, loved, loved your hors d'oeuvres she threw them in the trash?"
"Aw she was probably just trying to spare my feelings." Applejack insisted.
"No she was just being fake and totally insincere." Twilight yelled.
"She did raise her voice at one of my birds during rehearsal..." Fluttershy said quietly.
"See? Rude." Twilight said, crossing her legs.
"But he was singing really off key." Fluttershy said, lifting up a bird from under the table.
The bird let out a few terrible squawks.
"Pinkie Pie, you had to have noticed how she treated-" Twilight stopped midway through her sentence as Pinkie Pie and Spike were playing with the toppers, laughing wildly..
"Nevermind." Twilight muttered. "Rainbow Dash you're with me, right?"
"Sorry Twi." Rainbow Dash said as she stretched her wings. "Been too busy prepping for my sonic rainboom to pay much attention to the bride’s bad attitude."
Twilight let out an annoyed groan.
"The Princess is about to get married. I'm sure any negative behavior she might be displaying is simply the result of nerves." Rarity said.
"And I'm sure it's the result of her being an awful pony who doesn't deserve to even know Shining Armor, let alone marry him!" Twilight yelled as she slammed her hooves on the table.
"Think maybe you're just bein' a tiny bit possessive of your brother?" Applejack asked.
The girls all nodded in unison.
"I am not being possessive. And I am not taking it out on Cadance. You're just all too caught up in your wedding planning to notice that maybe there shouldn't even be a wedding!" Twilight left the table in anger and went to go find her brother.
Meanwhile all the guys were with Shining Armor in a room protected by a pair of royal guards. Tucker peered his head out of the room and tapped on one of the guards shoulders.
"Hey buddy, do you know any clubs around here?" Tucker asked the Royal Guard.
"Clubs?" He asked flatly.
"Yeah, you know clubs. A club where this suave motherfucker can get a lap dance."
"Tucker he's getting married you idiot." Church muttered.
The Royal Guard shook his head and turned away from Tucker.
"Could have just said no." Tucker muttered. He tapped the Royal Guards shoulder again. "Know where we can get some drinks and get hammered?"
The Royal Guard did not turn to Tucker but shook his head once again.
"Just give up blue." Sarge grunted.
"No we need to make sure he has an awesome last night of freedom before he's tied down."
"As the captain of the Royal Guard I uh... think I know where we can get some hard cider." Shining Armor coughed quietly.
"Now we're talking!" Tucker laughed..
Shining Armor led the group of guys to the barracks and motioned them to come inside.
"Are we allowed to be in here?" Church asked. "What if we get caught?"
"What are they going to do?" Shining Armor chuckled. "Been awhile since I've had some actual fun. I'd like to let loose with a few guys who aren't with me because I'm their captain."
"I like this guy already." Tucker said.
"Alright I guess." Church shrugged.
"Let's hurry this shit up." Tucker said. "Caboose you stay by the door and keep guard, and for the love of god do not help anybody."
"Okay." Caboose said happily.
Shining Armor led the others down the barracks steps and in front of a locked door. He stuck his horn in the lock and it started to glow. The lock then snapped open and the door swung open to reveal nearly a dozen wooden kegs. Tucker grinned wildly and went up to one of them and pressed on the tap. A steady stream of liquid poured out and Tucker took a sip.
"Not the strongest but it should be good enough." Tucker said.
"I'm not too sure about this." Simmons said quietly.
"Hey, if they're getting drunk then I am too." Grif said.
"How are we going to bring this back?" Tucker asked.
"We carry it." Shining Armor grinned. "Or more specifically you carry it."
"Alright, pile one on." Tucker said, prepping his back to carry the keg.
"Wow, you're actually doing work." Church muttered.
"I was starting to think this place was boring, now that I have something to make it awesome I'm going to take advantage of it."
"You ready?" Shining Armor asked.
Tucker nodded and Shining Armor pushed a keg on to Tuckers back.
"How exactly are we going to sneak this back?" Church asked. "It would look pretty damn suspicious if they see him walking around with a keg on his back."
Shining Armor looked at one of the tables that had a giant cloth over it. He motioned towards it and raised his brow.
"Yeah because that would be so much less conspicuous."
"What would you suggest then?" Tucker muttered.
"I would recommend putting it down and walking away, but you're an idiot so I know you wouldn't go for that."
"Just throw the damn thing over my back."
Shining Armor walked up to the table and took the cloth off to place it over the keg. Once it was on it Shining Armor and Tucker shared a quick nod.
"Let's hurry back and try not to get seen." Shining Armor said.
Tucker nodded and slowly walked out of the room, trying to keep the keg from moving.
"What do you have there? Is it a present?" Caboose asked.
"Yeah Caboose, it's one hell of a present." Tucker said.
"Yay I love presents!" Caboose yelled.
"Shut the fuck up." Tucker said quietly.
"Caboose it's not for you." Church said.
"Hey I think giving him some would be funny to see." Tucker said.
Church just shook his head, not wanting to get Caboose even more brain dead than he already is.
"The coast is clear." Grif said, coming back from outside.
"Alright let's hurry up." Tucker muttered. "This thing is fucking heavy."
The group walked out of the barracks and started to make their way back to Shining Armor's home.
"How much further is it?" Tucker said in a strained voice after ten minutes of slowly walking.
"Not much farther." Shining armor promised. "Probably about three more min-"
"Shining Armor what is it that you are doing?" A thundering voice called out.
A dark alicorn landed next to Shining Armor and looked over all the other guys.
"We're just checking on some things Princess Luna, don't worry." Shining Armor said quietly.
"Who are these others? I have never seen them before." Luna said boldly.
"They're uh..." Shining Armor trailed off.
"We're new recruits." Tucker said. "We were just bringing this water to the reception area so it can be given to the guests after the wedding."
Luna looked Tucker square in the face, looking for signs of deceit. Shining Armor hit Tucker in the side relatively hard.
"Soldier that was out of line and you will speak to the princesses when addressed." Shining Armor exclaimed.
"Oh f... course" Tucker grunted.
"Glad to see your affairs in order." Luna nodded. "I must go back to my post to ensure Canterlot is secured for the rest of the night."
"Yes Princess." Shining Armor said with a bow. The others followed his lead and Luna flew back off to the tower.
"What the fuck was that about?" Tucker hissed, rubbing his side, barely noticing his mistake in time to keep the keg on his back.
"Sorry, we had to make it seem authentic." Shining Armor said.
"Could have fucking told me." Tucker muttered.
Once they arrived back at Shining Armor’s house, Tucker slowly walked up the stairs and let the keg roll off of his back.
"Hang on, I'll go get something to hold the drinks in." Shining Armor said, quickly leaving the room to go to the kitchen.
"This is just a bad idea." Church muttered.
"You would think that." Tucker said. "Why don't you just let loose for once in your damn life?"
"This might fuck up his wedding though."
"When has alcohol ever hurt anyone?"
"I feel stupider just from hearing that."
Shining Armor came back in the room with a bunch of mugs and laid them out on a table. Tucker grabbed a mug and threw it under the keg and filled it up.
"Well?" Tucker asked. "Let's get started."
"I'm not having any." Church said.
"Have one drink." Tucker insisted.
"If I have one will you shut up about it?"
Instead of a reply Tucker filled a mug up and gave it to Church. Soon all the guys had a mug. Even Caboose had one but he just stared at it curiously.
"What is it?" Caboose asked.
"It's apple juice." Tucker said.
"Oh boy I love apple juice!" Caboose exclaimed. He chugged the entire mug and his face went green. "This tastes like rotten apple juice..."
"Want another?" Shining Armor asked.
"No it tastes like unhappiness."
Church let out a relieved sigh and took a sip of the drink.
"What do you think of it?" Tucker asked.
"Not bad." Church said quietly.
"It came straight from the Canterlot brewery." Shining Armor said as he took a sip from his mug. "It is reserved for special occasions which I felt was apt for the situation. Think you'll be wanting another?"
"Maybe later."
"Don't be a pansy." Sarge taunted as he filled another mug. "Are all the blues weak drinkers?"
"I can drink the hell out of you red." Tucker said, mimicking Sarge's voice with the last word.
"Is that a bet?" Sarge asked with a raised brow.
Sarge and Tucker were half way through a drinking contest when the door swung open and all the guys turned around.
"What are you doing?" Cadance yelled, taking the mug out of his hoof with her magic. She sniffed it and scowled. "Why are you doing this on our wedding night?"
"Come on Cadance I haven't had any time to just sit down what with the spell and all." Shining Armor said.
"You care about getting intoxicated with others more than you care about being ready for the wedding?" Cadance asked.
"Hey Princess whatever-your-name-is." Tucker muttered. "Listen we were just-"
"Who are you and why are you talking to me?" Cadance asked.
"Someone who doesn't have a pole up their a-"
"I'm sorry about him princess, he doesn't know when to shut the hell up." Church said, swiftly acting in an attempt to save the quickly degrading situation. "I tried to talk him out of it but... do you have idiots here? Because he is one of them."
"At least one of them seems to have a head on their shoulders." Cadance said. "What is your name."
"Church." Church said, extending his hoof to Cadance.
"Well Church, would you mind keeping an eye on my soon-to-be husband while I give the others a talking to?" Cadance said, not meeting Church's hoof.
"As long as someone is doing it." Church muttered.
"You two go downstairs." Cadance ordered.
"Yes dear." Shining Armor said, leaving the room with Church.
"Sorry about them being... well them." Church said quietly.
"Don't be. I was hoping to finally hang out with some guys, you know?"
"Trust me, I've been hanging out with these guys for years and I hate them."
"I could tell there wasn't much friendliness being tossed back and forth in there." Shining Armor chuckled. "I still feel bad for them in there. I don't think I've ever seen Cadance this stressed."
"They've had it coming for a long time." Church laughed. "You're a lot more down to earth than I thought you would have been, you being a captain of the Royal Guard and all."
"Thanks."
Church and Shining Armor stood in silence for a few minutes.
"So you've been staying with my sister." Shining Armor said, breaking the silence
"Yeah." Church said slowly, unsure of what to expect from Twilight’s brother.
"How's she been treating you?" Shining asked earnestly.
"Better than I've been treated by most." Church shrugged, relieved that he hadn’t suddenly gotten overly-protective.
"Good." Shining Armor nodded as he adjusted the crest on his suit.
There was a sudden knock on the door and both of their heads snapped to it. Shining Armor slowly walked up to the door and opened it.
"Twily!" Shining Armor said with a smile. "Your big brother's looking pretty good, doncha think?"
Twilight looked up to Shining Armor with a dejected look. Church and Shining Armor shared a brief glance with each other.
"Everything okay?" Shining Armor asked.
"We need to talk." Twilight stated. "I think you're making a big-"
"Ahem." Cadance interrupted.
"Oh ,um, hi sweetie." Shining Armor said with an innocent smile, pretending that the drinking hadn't happened.
"She sure has a way of sneaking up on people." Twilight muttered.
"Could I speak to you for a moment dear?" Cadance said.
"I better see what she wants." Shining Armor chuckled, elbowing Twilight in her chest.
Cadance and Shining Armor went in to the adjacent room and started to talk to each other, leaving Church alone with Twilight.
"Hey Twilight." Church said. "How wa-"
"Shh." Twilight whispered as she snuck up to the door to listen to their conversation.
"Just listen to me." Cadance said
"I'm listening, I'm listening..." Shining Armor groaned.
"I thought I made it perfectly clear I didn't want you to wear that."
"This was my favorite uncle’s."
"And?" Cadance asked icily.
"And I think I should wear it."
"Are you disagreeing with me?"
"I guess I am." Shining Armor stated strongly before grunting in pain.
"Oh dear, are you getting another one of your headaches?"
Church looked over Twilight to see Cadance shooting a green beam of magic in to Shining Armor’s horn.
"What did sh-"
"Shh." Twilight hushed again, putting her hoof over Church's mouth.
"Feeling better?" Cadance asked.
Shining Armor nodded his head, eyes green and unfocused.
"She isn't just unpleasant and rude. She's downright evil." Twilight gasped.
Shining Armor made his way to the door. Twilight grabbed Church and ran towards the exit.
"Twilight!" Shining Armor exclaimed.
"Let her go." Cadance insisted.
"Huh, it seemed like she had something else she wanted to tell me."
Church and Twilight kept on running to get to the other girls.
"Who goes there?" Luna called out.
"Her again." Church remarked dryly.
"Stay indoors Twilight Sparkle." Luna warned. "Recruit, get back to your post in the reception hall."
"Shining Armor is in real trouble." Twilight exclaimed as she burst through the door. "You need to help-"
Twilight stopped when she saw her friends adorned with heavily detailed yet beautiful dresses.
"Dresses?" Twilight asked. "What are you-"
"Can you believe it?" Fluttershy asked happily. "We're going to be Princess Mi Amore Cadenza's new bridesmaids."
"New bridesmaids? What happened to her old bridesmaids?"
"She didn't say, but she did tell us that she would love, love, love it if we'd fill in fer them." Applejack said.
"Seeing as we've been working so hard and everything." Rarity added.
"And ya had your doubts 'bout her." Applejack tutted.
"Told you she was an absolute gem." Rarity smiled.
"You sure this is what I should wear?" Rainbow Dash asked as she kicked the back of her dress. "It doesn't seem all that aerodynamic."
"I'll see what I can do." Rarity promised.
"This is so exciting." Applejack laughed.
"Oh I know this is awesome!" Pinkie exclaimed.
Twilight left the building with Church, head hanging low.
"Looks like I really am on my own." Twilight said sadly.
"I'm with you." Church said, laying a hoof on Twilight's shoulder. "We'll get to the bottom of this."
Twilight smiled weakly and nodded as they left. The next morning, the five girls were in the wedding hall to practice the ceremony.
"Perfect girls. No need to Rush." Celestia said.
The girls looked at each other and started to giggle.
"Then of course Cadance will enter." Celestia added.
The door opens and Cadance enters with the wedding music playing. Shining Armor's jaw drops as he saw his beautiful wife walk towards him.
"I'll say a few words and then I'll begin with the vows." Celestia said as Cadance and Shining Armor nuzzled each other. "Shining Armor you will get the ring from your best mare."
Shining Armor turned around to grab the ring from Twilight, but she was not there.
"Do you? I do." Spike said as he played with the toppers.
"Hey, has anypony seen Twilight?" Shining Armor asked.
The doors swung open once again to reveal Twilight glaring at Cadance. All the ponies stared at her curiously.
"I'm here. I'm not going to stand next to her and neither should you!" Twilight exclaimed.
"I'm sorry I don't know why she's acting like this." Shining Armor said to Cadance nervously.
"Maybe we should just ignore her." Cadance said.
"You have to listen to me." Twilight stated.
"Oh goodness, are you okay?" Fluttershy asked.
"I'm fine."
"Ya sure 'bout that?" Applejack asked. Her hat was forced over her face by Twilight’s magic.
"I've got something to say." Twilight said. "She's evil."
Shining Armor stepped in front of Cadance and the girls started gasping.
"She's been horrible to my friends, she's obviously done something to her bridesmaids, and if that wasn't enough I saw her put a spell on my brother that made his eyes go all-" Twilight stopped and started spinning her eyes in circles.
Twilight grinned and backed Cadance in to the wall. Cadance eyes shifted from side to side and started to cry.
"Why are you doing this to me?" Cadance asked.
"Because you're evil. Evil! And if I don't stop you, you're going to ruin my brother’s life."
The girls stared at Twilight slack jawed as Cadance ran out of the hall. Twilight turned around, promptly bumping into Shining Armor who was glaring at her.
"You want to know why my eyes went all-" Shining Armor said, rolling his eyes in circles. Shining Armor grunted in pain and rubbed his head. "Because ever since I started having to perform my protection spell I've been getting terrible migraines. Cadance hasn't been casting spells on me, she's been using her magic to heal me. And she decided to replace her bridesmaids because she found out the only reason they wanted to be in the wedding was so that they could meet Canterlot royalty. And if she hasn't been on her best behavior with your friends it's because with me being so busy, she's had to make all the decisions about the wedding."
"I was just trying to-"
"She's completely stressed out because it's really important to her that our big day be perfect. Something that obviously wasn't important to you. Now if you'll excuse me I have to go and comfort my bride. And you can forget about being my best mare." Shining Armor yelled. He looked to the ground and shook his head. "In fact if I were you I wouldn't show up to the wedding at all."
Shining Armor left the room and Twilight looked back to her friends who were staring at her with looks of doubt.
"Come on ya'll, let's go check on the princess." Applejack said as she adjusted her hat.
The girls left the room to catch up to Shining Armor.
"I was-"
"You have a lot to think about." Celestia said angrily as she too walked past Twilight.
"Maybe I was being overprotective." Twilight said quietly. She trudged on to some steps and laid down on them. "I could have gained a sister, but instead I just lost a brother."
Twilight soon had tears rolling down her cheek. Church walked up to her and sat next to her.
"It's going to be okay, everybody makes mistakes." Church said.
Twilight hugged Church tightly and began to sing softly. "He was my big brother best friend forever."
Singing, really? Church thought to himself, but said nothing.
"And now we'll never do anything together."
Church and Twilight turned to see Cadance staring at Twilight, eyes soft.
"I'm sorry." Twilight said.
"You will be." Cadance muttered as her eyes flashed green.
A green fire surrounded Church and Twilight, pulling them into the ground.
Twilight's eyes snapped open. She found herself surrounded by darkness. She lit her horn in an attempt to illuminate the area around her.
"Hello?" Twilight called out, but simply got her own query in reply as her voice bounced around the cavern. She got up and started to walk around. "Is anyone there?"
"Twilight? Where are you?" Church groaned.
"I'm over here." Twilight called back.
"As much as I appreciate you answering me I'm afraid it doesn't help my current situation seeing as it's pitch black..."
Twilight channeled more magic into her horn, finding Church on the far side of the room. The sudden light blinded Church, who shut his eyes against the abrupt intrusion. "Can you see now?"
"Yeah." Church said as he rubbed his eyes. "Just a little blind from the sudden flas-"
Church got caught off mid sentence due to him slamming his face in to the side of the cavern.
"Are you okay?" Twilight asked.
"I think so." Church muttered. "Where are we?"
Seemingly in response to his question, the crystal walls of the cave flashed green and an image of Cadance appeared in front of them.
"The fuck?" Church muttered.
"The caves beneath Canterlot." Boomed Cadance’s voice. “Once home to greedy unicorns who wanted to claim the gems that could be found inside, and now your prison.”
"Help!" Twilight yelled. "Help!"
"It's no use, no one can hear you. And no one will ever think to look here for you either. Most ponies have forgotten that these caves even exist which is why they are the ideal place to keep the ones who try to interfere with my plans." Cadance broke off in a maniacal laugh.
"Plans? What plans?"
"The plans I have for your brother of course." Cadance said simply, as if it should have been obvious.
"Don't you dare do anything to my brother you- you monster."
"Only way to stop me is to catch me." Cadance said as she started to laugh maniacally. Her image quickly skipped from one rock to the other. "Over here," it taunted.
Twilight shot a projectile at the last place she saw Cadance, but it reflected off of the surface of the cave and bounced around until it hit the ground, missing Church by a hair.
"Good to see I'm not the only terrible shot..." Church muttered under his breath.
"Nope, over here." Cadance taunted.
Twilight kept shooting surges of magic out of her horn, modifying the spell to shatter the stones that stuck out of the walls instead of bounce around. Church stared at her silently as he saw that she was out for blood now. Twilight shot at a large stone embedded in the wall and it splintered in to dozens of pieces, revealing Cadance sitting behind it. Twilight's pupils dilated and she charged at Cadance.
"No, wait!" Cadance yelled but Twilight tackled her to the ground. "Please don't hurt me. Twilight it's me! Please you have to believe me, I've been imprisoned like you. The Cadance who brought you down here is an imposter."
"Likely story." Twilight said, lowering her horn to Cadance.
"Twilight stop!" Church yelled.
"Not now Church." Twilight said.
"She's telling the truth." Church said, putting a hoof on her to push her off of Cadance.
"Don't tell me she's tricked you too." Twilight said quietly.
"Look at her, she is covered in bruises." Church pointed out.
"I'll need more proof than a few bruises."
"Sunshine, sunshine, ladybugs awake." Cadance said as she lowered herself to the ground. "Clap your hooves-"
"And do a little shake." Twilight and Cadance said in unison.
Cadance smiled at Twilight as the unicorn threw herself over her old friend.
"You remember me!"
"Of course I do. How could I forget the filly I loved to sit for the most?"
A green flash came from the opposite side of the cave and Church looked at Twilight and Cadance.
"I don't mean to break up this little reunion or anything, but I think we should get out of here." Church coughed.
Cadance broke off from Twilight and nodded.
"He's right." Twilight agreed. "We have to stop her."
They started to run down a path towards where the white light came from, when out of nowhere Cadance began to sing.
"This day was going to be perfect.
The kind of day of which I dreamed since I was small.
But instead of having cake,
With all my friends to celebrate,
My wedding bells will not ring for me at all."
"Is this really necessary?" Church asked. The girls simply ignored him.
"We must escape,
before it's too late,
Find a way to save the day.
Hope?
I'll be lying if I say,
I don't fear that I may lose him,
To one who wants to use him,
Not care for love and cherish him each day."
Cadance noticed a minecart on a long track that spiraled down into the darkness. She tried to start it, but it would not budge while she continued singing.
"For I oh-so love the groom,
All my thoughts he-"
"Stop with the damn singing." Church barked, having endured enough of the sappiness. "Save it for when we're out of here."
Cadance opened her mouth to argue.
"No, just no. Stop singing and get in the fucking cart." Church grunted.
Cadance shared a glance with Twilight who stared at Church silently. Cadance nodded and jumped in the cart. Church nodded to Twilight who jumped in with Cadance. Church kicked the rocks out of the way, bucked the cart and grabbed it as it started rolling down the track. As the spiral proceeded downwards, Church soon realized that the track had not been finished. Before they could do anything the cart broke through the sign and they started falling.
"What are we going to do?" Church asked.
Cadance jumped out of the cart with Twilight and spread her wings, leaving Church in the cart. Cadance and Twilight landed on a level area while Church kept falling.
"For the love of-" Church muttered.
Church jumped out of the cart and grabbed on to the side of the cavern and slowly started to climb up. He got to the top and glared at Cadance.
"Couldn't have warned me, huh?"
"We need to get out of here." Cadance said, ignoring Church while she put her ear up to the wall. "Oh no, they're starting."
Inside the wedding hall, the girls were standing on one side of the carpet, while the guys were standing on the other.
"Where's Church?" Simmons asked.
"I don't know, last I saw him is when he left with Twilight's brother." Tucker said.
"Maybe he is playing hide and seek." Caboose suggested.
"Mares and gentlecolts, we are gathered here today to witness the union of Princess Mi Amore Cadenza and Shining Armor." Celestia said happily.
"Oh, we're never going to save him." Cadance said, defeated as she heard the ceremony starting. She slumped up against the wall and sniffled.
"We will, we just have to find-" Twilight started. She stopped as a white light shone above her. "There!"
Twilight teleported the three of them up to the light. Church looked around for a brief moment and let out a deep groan.
"What is it Church?"
"Oh it's nothing." Church said sarcastically. "I was just thinking that you could have done that at the start and brought us to the wedding hall. You know, it would have just saved five minutes of our lives and we could have been on our way by now."
"You're not going anywhere." Said the three bridesmaids as they walked out from the shadows.
"If it isn't one thing, it's another, isn't it?"
"Get the fuck out of our way." Church said.
The bridesmaids kept walking towards him.
"Listen I don't want to hurt yo-"
Lyra kicked Church in the jaw, causing him to fall backwards.
"What the shit?" Church yelled.
Cadance grabbed some flowers off the ground and threw them over some rocks. The bridesmaids snapped to attention and jumped after them.
"Really?" Church asked quietly. I have enough trouble understanding women as is.
"Let's go." Cadance said.
The three of them made it to the wedding hall just before the ceremony was completed.
"Princess Cadance and Shining Armor. " Celestia addressed. "It is my great pleasure to pronounce you-"
"Stop!" Twilight yelled, causing everypony to look at her, Rarity promptly facehoofing at the obscenity of her friend.
"Why does she have to be so possessive of her brother?" The impostor roared, stomping her hoof. She caught herself and brought her hoof up to her mouth and started to sob softly. "Why does she have to ruin my special day?"
"Because it's not your special day, it's mine." Cadance yelled.
"What? But how did you escape my bridesmaids?"
Cadance and Twilight looked at Church who was rubbing his mouth lightly.
"She threw flowers and they chased them." Church muttered.
"Hm, clever. But you're still too late."
"I don't understand, how kin there be two of 'em?"
"She's a changeling! She takes the form of somepony you love and gains power by feeding off of your love for them." Cadance exclaimed.
The impostor suddenly became engulfed in a green flame. As the flame disappeared the impostor changed back to her true form. She had wings and a horn like an alicorn, but her entire form was riddled with holes similar in appearance to that of moth eaten fabric. Her body was completely black, accentuated by her green eyes and complimented by her soft blue mane and wings.
"Who are you?" Twilight asked.
"I am Queen Chrysalis, the changeling queen."
"Chrysalis?" Tucker laughed. "Not only does she look like a fucking STD, but even her name sounds like one."
Queen Chrysalis ignored the insult and returned her attention to Cadance.
"Right you are Princess. And as queen of the changelings, it is up to me to find food for my subjects. Equestria has more love than any place I've ever encountered. My little changelings will be able to devour so much of it and we will gain more power than we have ever dreamed of."
"They'll never get the chance. Shining Armor's protection spell will prevent them from ever reaching us."
"I doubt that. Isn't that right dear?" Chrysalis turned to Shining Armor who slowly nodded in response.
Cadance started to charge at Chrysalis but her horn started to glow.
"Nuh-uh-uh, don't want to go back to the caves now, do you?" Chrysalis asked, to which Cadance slowly backed away. "Ever since I took your place, I've been feeding off of Shining Armor's love for you. Every moment he grows weaker and so does his spell. Even now my minions are chipping away at it." The ponies closest to the windows gasped as they saw hundreds of changelings crashing against the shield.
"He may not be my husband, but he is under my total control now. And I'm sorry to say, unable to perform his duties as Captain of the Royal Guard."
"Not my Shining Armor." Cadance reached out.
"Soon my changeling army will break through. First we take Canterlot, and then all of Equestria."
"No you won't." Celestia said from behind Chrysalis. "You may have made it impossible for Shining Armor to perform his spell, but now that you have so foolishly revealed your true self I can protect my subjects from you." She crossed horns with Chrysalis as she finished her statement.
Celestia broke the deadlock and flew into the air, shooting a beam of energy at Chrysalis, but she countered with a magic beam of her own. Celestia increased her focus and her beam started cutting through Chrysalis', causing her to shut her eyes in anticipation of the inevitable. But as Chrysalis opened her eyes, she realized the extent of the power that she had absorbed from Shining Armor. She concentrated her efforts, forcing her beam quickly up to Celestia's horn. Celestia gasped in surprise as she was sent careening backwards, her regalia parting from her head.
"Princess Celestia!" Twilight yelled as she ran to her mentor.
"Ah, Shining Armor's love for you is even stronger than I thought." Chrysalis laughed. "Consuming it has made me even more powerful than Celestia."
"The Elements of Harmony... you must get to them..." Celestia said weakly. "Use their power to defeat the queen."
The girls nodded as they threw off their dresses and ran out the door. Rarity and Simmons quickly caught all of them so their work did not get destroyed.
"There isn't time for that, let's fucking go!" Church yelled, pushing Rarity and Simmons ahead of him.
"You can run, but you can't hide!" Chrysalis bellowed.
As the crew made their way towards the Elements of Harmony, the shield above them collapsed and the changelings started to fly in.
"Keep running, we'll hold them off." Sarge grunted.
A changeling flew straight at Sarge so he kicked it in the head, cracking its skull which rendered it unconscious. A changeling charged at Simmons and grabbed the back of his suit and ripped it in half. Simmons came to a complete halt and glared at the changeling that then threw his suit to the ground.
"Keep running you fucking idiot!" Tucker screamed.
"No. This is the first thing I've made where I actually had help, and these fuckers tore it."
"Let it go Simmons." Church yelled. "Stop being such a bab-"
A sudden explosion caused everypony to fall in response to the concussive force. Before anypony could ask what happened, a second explosion ripped through the air. They all shakily stood up and turned to see Simmons standing still, surrounded by dozens of dark red orbs, dust settling all around them.
"Simmons what are you doing?" Rarity yelled.
A changeling dove towards Simmons, but he took one of the orbs in his magic, spinning it extremely quickly until it took the form of a long cylindrical shape. It had a small fire coming out of the back of it, but it just simply floated in the air. Once the changeling was close enough to Simmons, he released projectile allowing it to take off, hitting the changeling and blasting it to a million pieces.
"What’s happening?" Twilight asked.
"These fuckers are going to pay for that." Simmons snarled as another ball started to take the form of a rocket. "Keep going. Get the elements of whatever the hell they're called. I'll hold them off."
Sarge stood next to Simmons who smiled at the gesture. Suddenly Sarge punched Simmons in the side of the head, knocking him to the ground. Sarge then got tackled by Grif and Grif punched him in the face.
"Grif what are you doing?" Simmons yelled.
Sarge suddenly flashed green to reveal that it was a changeling, lying unconscious on the ground.
"Man that felt good." Grif laughed.
Sarge tackled one of the changelings out of the air and stomped on its head, making it slump over.
"Blues, you go with the other girls and help them." Sarge grunted.
Dozens of changelings charged at the girls but Simmons shot all the rockets floating around him at them, terminating a few but mostly dazing the others.
"Get some fuckers!" Simmons yelled. "This is how the reds do shit!"
"Are you sure you can handle it?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Don't worry, this isn't our first dealings with clones." Church said. "Now let's stop standing around and get this done."
"We're almost there." Twilight exclaimed as she made her way up some steps. She stopped in her tracks, causing the girls to run into her. Church and Tucker managed to catch themselves before becoming part of the pile-up. Until Caboose just plowed right through them and into the girls anyways, making their gesture much less meaningful.
"Looks like we'll have to do this the hard way." Rainbow Dash said, bringing her hooves together menacingly
"Bow chicka bow wow." Tucker said, rearing up onto his hind hooves as electricity pulsed to his front legs making an electrical blade. "I was beginning to think this day was going to be boring."
Tucker flew at one of the changelings and swiped at it, cutting off one of its wings.
"What are you waiting for?" Tucker asked Rainbow Dash, who was just standing there idly. "Hit something!"
Rainbow Dash promptly did as she was told, turning and punching Tucker in the face, causing him to fly backwards.
"Fuck." Tucker groaned.
"They're changelings, remember?" Twilight said.
"They're changelings, remember?" Repeated a chorus of changelings that had taken Twilight's form.
"Well this is going to get confusing fast." Church muttered.
"Hurry, we have to get to the Elements of Harmony. They're our only hope." Twilight continued.
"How will we know if we're about to hit one of us and not the changelings?" Tucker asked.
"Well if they're surrounding you to beat the shit out of you I would say it is safe to assume it's not one of us." Church muttered.
A few Caboose changelings walked up to Church with smirks on their faces.
"Caboose, my twin! Oh my gosh I have more than one twin! Oh, how I have missed you!" Caboose yelled, hugging the group of Cabooses. "We finally have time to do all those things you promised we would do! Like knitting!" The changelings looked at each other and slipped out of Cabooses' grasp and went after the others.
"Come back I loveded you!" Caboose yelled sadly. He turned to Fluttershy and frowned. "I thought you said they were not mean."
Twilight spotted a dogpile of Applejacks, so she blasted the group apart with a beam of magic, scattering them across the courtyard. She then lifted the remaining one off the ground and charged up her magic. "Real me! Real me!" Applejack yelled.
Pinkie stood in front of a changeling that quickly changed appearances, from Rarity to Rainbow Dash to Fluttershy.
"Do me, do me." Pinkie said happily, giggling and clapping her hooves together.
The changeling rolled its eyes and took Pinkie's form, open armed with a little goofy grin.
"Eh, I've seen better." Pinkie shrugged.
Pinkie grabbed Twilight and started pumping her tail, causing Twilight to shoot bolts of magic from her horn in rapid succession. Caboose looked at her and picked up Church and yanked his tail with no apparent effect.
"What the fuck Caboose!" Church yelled in pain. "What are you doing?"
"I do not know, but I will keep doing it!" Caboose yelled confusedly.
A changeling that was charging at Rarity was suddenly engulfed in a ball of fire and the remaining changelings started to fly away. Rarity turned to see Simmons and the others running up to them, changelings quick in pursuit.
"There's too many, they just keep coming!" Grif yelled.
"It doesn't matter, we're almost there." Twilight said.
As the group ran to the building where the Elements were being held, the changelings were quickly catching up. Twilight opened the door to find that it was filled from wall to wall with changelings. The group turned to run to see that the changelings behind them had caught up and they were surrounded.
"There's too many." Twilight said sadly. "We can't fight them all off."
"I can sure as hell try." Sarge grunted as he ran into the fray, Simmons firing rockets off over his head.
Back in the wedding hall Celestia awoke to find herself imprisoned in something that could only be described as a cocoon, while Cadance, Shining Armor and Spike were standing by the arch.
"You won't get away with this." Cadance yelled, her feet attached to the floor by a green goop. "Twilight and her friends will-"
The doors shot open to display the mentioned group entering. Escorted by a large number of changelings.
"You were saying?" Chrysalis asked before turning to Twilight and her friends. "You do realize the receptions been cancelled, don't you? Go! Feed!" She commanded the lesser changelings.
The door slammed behind the changelings as they charged out.
"It's funny really, Twilight here was suspicious of my behavior all along." Chrysalis laughed as she flew to the arch. "Too bad the rest of you were all caught up in your wedding planning to realize those suspicions were correct."
"Sorry Twi, we shoulda listened to ya." Applejack said quietly.
"It's not your fault. She fooled everypony."
"Hm, I did, didn't I?" Chrysalis asked. "This day has been just perfe-"
"You too? Shut the fuck up!" Church yelled. "Jesus, what the hell is it with everybody and singing today?"
Chrysalis glared at Church but turned back to the window to watch the destruction her minions were wreaking.
"Quick, go to him while you still have the chance." Twilight said to Cadance, freeing her feet with her magic.
"She has already won." Cadance whispered. "It's too late."
"It's never too late to fight for the ones you love. She is using your love as a tool against you." Church said. "Don't let what has happened to me happen to you.”
"What if she stops me?" Cadance asked. "I fear her magic is stronger than mine."
"I think I know a way I can distract her." Church said quietly.
"What are you going to do?" Twilight asked.
"Hey Queenie!" Church yelled, slowly walking towards Chrysalis. "So you feed off of love?" Chrysalis turned to Church and her horn started to glow, ready to attack. "Well I have a fuck ton of it." Church said, coming to a full stop a couple feet away from her. "Come and get it."
Chrysalis stared curiously at Church, unsure of what he was doing.
"Ah I can just feel the love emanating from inside you. The love you have is stronger than any I have ever encountered. " Chrysalis smirked. "If I control you I can take over Equestria with more ease than if I control that Shining Armor fool."
"Well then what the fuck are you waiting for?" Church jeered.
Chrysalis' horn shot a beam at Church's horn and Church's eyes started to flash green. Church let out a scream and started to push the magic back with his own beam. Chrysalis gasped as Church's power was edging over hers, pushing it back, destroying it. Suddenly Chrysalis' beam completely vanished and Church's beam surrounded Chrysalis in a blue grip.
"What is this? How are you denying my magic?" Chrysalis asked as she found herself unable to move. "My magic has defeated Celestia herself!"
"Do you know what it feels like loving someone who’s in a rush to throw you away?" Church asked. "Because I sure as hell do. And because of it I've learned that it's possible to hate what I love."
"This is impossible." Chrysalis snarled.
"I used to think a lot of things were impossible." Church muttered as he turned to Cadance and nodded. "Do it now while you still have the chance."
Cadance returned the nod and went up to Shining Armor and hugged him tightly. A small red heart came out of her horn and drifted over to Shining Armor's forehead and popped, breaking the spell that Chrysalis had put on him.
"Is the wedding over?" Shining Armor asked shakily.
"It's all over." Chrysalis yelled.
"Use the spell!" Twilight exclaimed.
"What is the use? My changelings already roam free."
"They will fall once their queen falls." Simmons said in reply
"I don't have enough strength to repel them." Shining Armor said as the light faded after attempting the spell.
"My love will give you strength." Cadance said as she hugged Shining Armor once again.
"What a lovely, but absolutely ridiculous sentiment." Chrysalis laughed.
"Big talk coming from the one who can't move." Church said.
Shining Armor looked at Cadance who gave him a loving smile. Shining Armor lowered his head and his horn started to flicker. Cadance lowered her horn towards his, sparks connecting the two until they made contact, her horn igniting into a teal glow. A ball of purple energy formed at the point of contact, quickly growing to consume the pair. They started to slowly float in to the air with their eyes closed, oblivious to everything other than their love for each other and the spell they were weaving. They opened their eyes and a white flash filled the room, and the bubble quickly expanded.
"No!" Chrysalis yelled as the bubble pushed her out the window. The shield kept pushing outwards, pushing each of the the changelings out of Canterlot. Cadance and Shining Armor landed softly on the ground and hugged each other. Twilight ran over to Celestia who was now on the ground, as the bubble had destroyed her cocoon, and helped her up.
"Don't worry about me, I'm fine." Celestia said. "You have a real wedding to put together."
The wedding was about to begin and Twilight was standing next to Shining Armor at the altar. Shining Armor's crest had fallen out of place and Twilight realigned to its proper position, earning her a grin from her brother. The other girls were standing on one side of the steps in their beautiful dresses and the guys were on the other in their suits. Simmons managed to fix most of the suit before the ceremony but there were still visible marks and stitches.
"You look fine Simmons, there is no need to worry." Rarity said quietly.
Simmons looked up and nodded gratefully. He stood straight and forgot about the condition his suit was in as Fluttershy started directing her bird choir. The doors opened up to show Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo hopping towards the altar, scattering flowers on the carpet as they made their way up the aisle. Cadance then started her slow walk towards the altar, the tail of the dress being lifted by a few songbirds.
"Seriously though, I get why the queen of the changelings wanted to be with you, but how did you get someone as amazing as Cadance to marry you?" Twilight asked jokingly
"I told her she wouldn't just be gaining a husband, she would be getting a pretty great sister too." Shining Armor replied.
Rarity wiped a tear out of her eye with a handkerchief as Cadance walked up to the alter. Applejack, noticing that Rarity wasn’t paying attention to her, pulled out her stetson and placed it back on her head.
"Mares and gentlecolts, we are gathered here today to celebrate the union of the real Princess Mi Amore Cadenza-"
"Princess Cadance is fine." Cadance insisted.
Celestia gave her an understanding smile. "The union of Princess Cadance and Shining Armor. The strength of their commitment is clear. The power of their love, undeniable." She turned to Spike and nodded. "May we have the rings please?"
Spike held up the rings on the velvet pillow and Celestia placed the rings on both of their horns.
"I now pronounce you mare and colt."
Shining Armor and Cadance nodded and made their way to the balcony. They opened the door to the sound of thunderous cheers.
"This is your victory as much as theirs." Celestia said to Twilight and Church who were now standing next to each other. "You persisted in the face of doubt and your actions led to your being able to bring the real Princess Cadance back to us. Learning to trust your instincts is a valuable lesson to learn."
"Didn't Church use the power of hate to overpower the power of love?" Tucker muttered, to which Simmons elbowed him in the side.
Shining Armor and Cadance shared a kiss on the balcony.
"Rainbow Dash, that's your cue." Celestia remarked as she leaned in next to Rainbow Dash.
Rainbow Dash smiled and grabbed Tucker.
"Come on Tucker it's time to go!" Rainbow Dash exclaimed.
"Wha-"
"I think it would be cooler if you did your lightning thing too."
"Uh, alright." Tucker muttered, flying with Rainbow Dash.
Once Rainbow Dash was far enough away she pulsed forward and a rainbow appeared behind her. Tucker grabbed the rainbow and started to spin around it, sparks starting to fly out of his legs. Tucker caught up to Rainbow Dash and they grabbed each other's hooves and pulsated forward, leaving an explosion of rainbow colored electricity behind them.
"Best. Wedding. Ever!" Rainbow Dash squealed.
"It wasn't bad." Tucker chuckled.
Later in the day the new happily married couple made their way to the Canterlot garden and started their slow dance.
"Hello everypony, did I miss anything?" Luna asked as she landed next to the others.
The boys slowly turned their heads the other way, avoiding eye contact with her.
"What are the recruits doing here?" Luna asked.
"Recruits?" Celestia repeated, raising a brow to the guys.
"I've been meaning to ask, what did she mean by that earlier?" Twilight asked, turning to Church.
"Sorry we kind of lied to you." Church laughed awkwardly as he looked at Luna. "We're not recruits."
"I figured as much." Luna smiled. "We will speak of this at a later time, but for now we shall stick to the festivities."
"Sounds good." Church said.
Twilight turned to Pinkie and nodded. Pinkie smiled and ran to the DJ booth and took Vinyl Scratch out from under the table.
"Let's get this party started!" Pinkie yelled.
Pinkie threw a microphone to Twilight who grabbed it out of the air with her magic and opened her mouth. She paused momentarily as she looked at Church.
"Now is a good time to sing I guess." Church shrugged.
Twilight smiled and nodded.
"Doesn't mean I have to enjoy it though." Church added under his breath.
"Love is in bloom,
A beautiful bride,
a handsome groom,
Two hearts becoming one,
A bond that cannot be undone,
because,
Love is in bloom,
A beautiful bride,
a handsome groom,
I said,
love is in bloom ,
Starting a life and making room,
For us."
Twilight left the mic and walked up to Church. Twilight noted that her friends were all having fun. Pinkie and Caboose were attacking the giant cake, Applejack was playing the violin while Sarge accompanied her on a harmonica. Tucker and Rainbow Dash were having a great time on the dance floor while Simmons and Rarity were talking with Flint and Fancypants, and Grif was talking with Fluttershy away from most of the noise.
"So Church." Twilight said silently. "I was just wondering... maybe if you wanted..."
"You can talk to me, I promise I won't bite."
"I was just wondering if you wanted to dance?"
"I don't know..." Church trailed off. "Dancing isn't really my sort of thing."
"Oh. That's okay." Twilight said trying to cover up the fact that she was saddened by his response.
"Want to know what? Screw it." Church laughed, reaching his hoof forward. "I think that after all that has happened in my life I deserve to have a little fun with my friends."
Twilight smiled happily as she grabbed Church's hoof and went next to her brother, dancing with Church right up to the last song. A carriage arrived and Shining Armor and Cadance walked up to it. Cadance went inside as Twilight and Church waited alongside the door.
"Twilight! None of this would have been possible without you little sis." Shining Armor said. "Love you Twily."
"Love you too BBBFF." Twilight said as she hugged Shining Armor.
"You know Church, we never got to finish my bachelor party properly." Shining Armor said as he raised his hoof. "Maybe we could pick off where we left off at a later date."
"Sounds good to me." Church said, shaking Shining Armor's hoof.
Shining Armor climbed in to the carriage with Cadance.
"Ready to go?" Shining Armor asked.
"Oh, almost forgot." Cadance gasped.
Cadance grabbed the bouquet of flowers and threw it out of the carriage.
"Mine!" Rarity exclaimed as she dove for the bouquet, pushing other ponies out of the way. “Eh he he... mine...” she finished, grinning sheepishly.
"Now this was a great wedding." Twilight said as the carriage left.
"Oh yeah, just wait until you see what I have planned for the bachelor party!" Spike smirked.
"Sorry little dude but we kind of already have that wrapped up." Tucker said.
"Oh." Spike said.
"Do you even know what a bachelor party is yet?" Tucker asked.
"No." Spike admitted.
"Yeah, that's probably for the best." Church said.
Celestia landed next to the group of them and smiled.
"I just wanted to let you all know that I have ordered the royal carriage to take you all home." Celestia said. "I hope you all had a good time."
"I think today was perfect." Twilight smiled.
"I think it was pretty good too." Church said.
"I have other business to attend to, so I wish you farewell." Celestia said, flying back into the castle.
A large carriage landed next to the group of them and they all started to make their way towards it.
"This was a pretty good day." Grif said happily as he started into a giant slice of cake.
"Yeah, it really makes you think doesn't it?" Simmons asked. "I mean, that love truly does conquer all and as long as you have love you can be happy no matter what."
"Yeah, I guess. I was just kind of just thinking about how you got to use your ability or whatever and I have some awesome food." Grif laughed. "Oh and Simmons?"
"Yeah Grif?"
"Shotgun."
"FUCK!"
Grif woke up the next morning and rolled off the couch onto the floor. "Why can't I just be asleep forever..." Grif moaned.
Haley jumped off the couch and stood next to Grif, sniffing him curiously.
"Think you can bring me to the kitchen?" Grif asked. "I don't feel like getting up."
Haley let out a low growl that sounded suspiciously like a groan of annoyance. Haley then grabbed on to one of Grif's wings and started to drag him to the kitchen, but it took her five minutes to drag him much more than an inch.
"Fine I'll do it myself." Grif said as he got off the ground.
Grif slowly stumbled to the kitchen and saw Fluttershy feeding the group of birds from the wedding.
"Good morning Grif." Fluttershy said quietly.
"Mornin'." Grif grunted. "What are you doing?"
"They had a really long day yesterday so I am making sure they are well rested." Fluttershy said as she pet one of them on the head. "How was your sleep?"
"Pretty good. The worst part was waking up." Grif chuckled. "I'd do anything for a smoke right now."
"Smoke?" Fluttershy echoed.
"Something told me that you wouldn't know what that is." Grif muttered. "So what are you doing later?"
"What do you mean?" Fluttershy asked.
"I don't know, I was sort of thinking we could hang out or something."
Fluttershy's cheeks went a deep shade of red and she broke eye contact. "D-don't we already hang out?" Fluttershy asked bashfully.
"Well... technically I guess. But you're always worrying about something or other."
"I am?"
"Yeah, you are."
"I'm sorry."
"See what I mean?" Grif asked.
"Yes. Sor-" Fluttershy started but stopped when she looked in to Grif's eyes.
"And you did promise that you would take a day off after I went through that whole wolf ordeal."
"Okay." Fluttershy said. "Hanging out sounds... fun."
"Great." Grif laughed as he clasped his hooves together. "Let's get started."
"Get what started? I thought we weren't going to do anything."
"Congratulations, that was the first test and you have passed!"
Fluttershy started to laugh softly with Grif. Grif looked out the window and saw a place where the trees were fairly close together. "Say, you wouldn't happen to have a large net or a spare blanket, would you?"
"I think I might have another spare blanket." Fluttershy said, turning to go out in to the main room. "Why do you ask?"
"I have an idea." Grif said. "Grab the blanket and meet me out back."
"Okay." Fluttershy said, growing curious about what Grif was planning.
Fluttershy went up to her room to find a blanket while Grif went in the backyard to look around. He walked up to one of the trees and bucked it lightly, barely managing to shake the tree. He hit it a bit harder with the same result. He went to the next tree and bucked it, this time the tree didn't even shake.
"This should work." Grif smiled.
Fluttershy came out of the house and walked up to Grif with a blanket folded over her back.
"I have the blanket." Fluttershy said quietly.
"Awesome." Grif said, grabbing the blanket off of Fluttershy and unfolding it. "This should work."
Grif went to one of the trees and started to tie two corners together on the opposite side of the tree.
"What are you doing?" Fluttershy asked as Grif went to the other tree.
"I'm making a hammock." Grif chortled.
"Oh." Fluttershy said quietly. "This seems like a lot of trouble just so you can sleep." Fluttershy stated.
"You know the saying work hard, play harder?" Grif asked to which Fluttershy nodded slowly. "Well I prefer the saying don't work, rest indefinitely."
"That's... a nice saying." Fluttershy said slowly.
"It's a work in progress, but you know what I mean." Grif said as he finished tying the other two corners together.
Grif backed away from it and eyed it happily.
"Can't wait to test this baby out." Grif said, getting ready to hop on it. Then he heard a voice call out.
"Grif are you there? I need to talk to you."
"Dammit Simmons." Grif muttered. "I'll go see what he wants. Meanwhile why don't you make sure that this thing won't tear when anything sits on it."
Fluttershy nodded as Grif walked around the house to see Simmons.
"Whoa, what are you doing outside?" Simmons asked with mild surprise.
"Don't patronize me. What do you want?"
"Well I was just going to ask you for that suit since I doubt you will use it anytime soon."
"Why do you want it?" Grif asked.
"Well knowing you you'll either tear it or use it as a napkin." Simmons said. "Hell who am I kidding, you would probably eat it."
"Hang on I'll get it." Grif grunted. He went to the couch where the suit had been tossed and picked it up. Grif went back to the door and threw the suit over Simmons.
"Anything else I can do for you?" Grif asked, clearly beginning to get bothered.
"Well I can't really expect you to do more than two things in one day, can I?" Simmons asked as he took the suit off of his face and folded it onto his back.
"You know me all too well." Grif said sarcastically.
"So what were you doing outside anyways?" Simmons asked after standing in silence for a small amount of time.
"I was putting together a hammock up."
"You're the only person I know who will go outside just to sleep." Simmons said, placing his hoof on his face.
"You know what a wise man once said?"
"You can't teach an old dog new tricks?"
"No. If I didn't wake up, I'd still be sleeping. Now go away." Grif said, slamming the door shut. "Might as well grab something to eat while I'm in here."
Grif went in to the kitchen and whipped up a sandwich and poured himself a glass of water. He quickly ate the sandwich and downed the water in a few seconds. After he put the plate on the counter he walked to the backyard to see Fluttershy asleep on the hammock with Angel curled up on her side.
"I'll make a layabout out of her yet." Grif smiled.
Sarge cracked his eyes open ever so slightly to see Applebloom slowly opening the door. Applebloom squeezed through the crack and backed up, closely followed by the other Cutie Mark Crusaders.
"What are you doing?" Sarge asked curiously, eyes still not visibly open.
Each of the girls let out a yelp and whipped their heads to Sarge. "Ah fergot ya slept in here." Applebloom said, heart still racing from the scare.
"Where else would I be sleeping?" Sarge said simply, now getting up and stretching. "So what are you doing in here so early?"
"We were just going to grab some rope and a piece of wood." Scootaloo answered.
"Do I even want to know what you'll be using it for?" Sarge asked with a raised brow.
"We were just going to set up a swing on one of the trees." Sweetie Belle said.
"Want to help?" Scootaloo asked.
"Sorry, putting a swing up sounds like a job that no man would want to do. Go get Simmons to help you."
"That’s okay, we'll just-" Sweetie Belle started to have Scootaloo put her hoof over Sweetie Belle's mouth.
"Gee Sarge, that sounds an awful lot like something Grif would say." Scootaloo said innocently.
Sarge immediately jumped into action, picking up a piece of wood. He walked straight towards Scootaloo, fixing her with a glare that would’ve put Fluttershy to shame. Scootaloo slowly backed away from Sarge until she had her back against the wall. She put her leg over her face defensively. After a few seconds Scootaloo lowered her leg and looked up at Sarge who was staring at her in confusion.
"What are you waiting for soldier?" Sarge grunted. "Let's get this show on the road."
"Ah go' t' rop'." Applebloom said with two long strands of rope in her mouth.
"Great!" Scootaloo said.
Sarge went to try to find a tree that was suitable for the swing. Once he found one, he bucked it, checking to see that it was stable enough. Applejack had come outside and watched them put the swing together in a matter of minutes from a distance.
"You four havin' fun?" Applejack asked after Applebloom hopped on the swing.
"We made a swing!" Applebloom said.
"Ah kin see that." Applejack smiled. "Sarge, think ya kin get one of th' others t' come on over here?"
"Why would I do that?"
"Well ah was just thinkin' about lettin' them decide on 'nother challenge we could do."
"Fine, I'll go get Grif. He's probably not doing anything anyways and it has been awhile since I physically harmed him."
"Yer a true inspiration Sarge." Applejack said with a smirk.
"I do try my hardest." Sarge said. "I'll be back in a couple minutes."
Sarge arrived at Fluttershy's cottage in a matter of minutes, and once he got to the door he stared at it. "Hey Dirtbag! Get out here I need to talk to you." Sarge said, knocking on the door.
Sarge stood by the door for a full minute before knocking on the door again. After he got no answer he tried to open the door just to find it to be locked.
"Dammit Grif get off your ass and get out here." Sarge yelled.
After receiving no reply he looked through the window to the main room to see that Grif was not on the couch. Sarge let out an annoyed moan and made his way to the back of the cottage to knock on the other door. As he rounded the corner he saw Fluttershy sleeping on the hammock with Angel and Grif laying against one of the trees with Haley curled up between his legs. Sarge walked up to Grif and stared at him quietly.
"It's almost enough to make me want to leave him be for once." Sarge murmured, turning around.
"Almost." Sarge proceeded to buck Grif in the side, causing him to scream in pain and fall sideways to the ground. Fluttershy's eyes snapped open and she shrieked loudly. Fluttershy attempted to jump out of the hammock but she just ended up cocooned inside of it instead.
"Son of a bitch!" Grif yelled, turning to Sarge. "What the fuck was that for?"
"You looked so peaceful I just had to do it." Sarge said sadistically. "Now come on, as much as it hurts me to say this I need your-"
"Help." Fluttershy squeaked.
Sarge went up to hammock and spun it once. It snapped back in to place and Fluttershy was clinging to the blanket for dear life. She slowly released her grip and slowly let herself back onto the ground, body trembling.
"Are you okay?" Grif asked.
"I-I think..." Fluttershy said, voice cracking.
Fluttershy burst into tears and ran inside her cottage and slammed the door shut.
"Wow Sarge, I knew you were an asshole, but even I have to say that that was too far even for you."
"I didn't mean to do it." Sarge grunted.
"You still did it though." Grif said turning towards the cottage.
Grif went up to the door and tried to open it to find it locked.
"Get out of the way." Sarge muttered, pushing Grif to the side.
Sarge knocked on the door loudly.
"Go away!" Fluttershy yelled.
"She never seemed like the over emotional type." Grif said sincerely. "I think you might have broke her."
"Shut it." Sarge said. Sarge turned to the door and knocked once again. "Can you come out here I need to tell you something."
"No, please g-go away." Fluttershy said.
"What are you planning on telling her?" Grif asked. "That you stomped on a bunch of bunnies on your way here?"
"No you idiot, I'm going to apologize." Sarge said flatly.
Grif ran to the door and started slamming on it.
"Fluttershy can you come out here for a second?" Grif asked in an unusually soft spoken voice.
"What are you doing?" Sarge asked.
"It's not everyday you hear one of Sarge’s fabled apologies. I really want to hear what one sounds like."
"Well if she isn't going to answer to me, why would you expect her to answer for y-"
The door slowly creaked open and Fluttershy looked through the crack, cheeks damp.
"What is it?" Fluttershy asked, voice barely audible.
"I just wanted to say, uh, sorry?" Sarge said unconvincingly.
"Well Sarge, that didn't sound forced at all." Grif said.
Sarge stared coldly at Grif and turned back to Fluttershy. "Listen, um, Fluttershy. I am sor-"
"Really." Grif said happily.
"Yes, thank you Grif." Sarge muttered sarcastically. "I am really sorry for making you cry. It won't happen again and I promise to take it easy on you from here on out."
Fluttershy sniffled and opened the door fully.
"Thank you for apologizing." Fluttershy said with a small smile.
"Glad that's over." Sarge said quickly, dragging Grif away. "Let's go Grif, we've got work to do."
"Why the hell should I help you?" Grif said, kicking his leg free from Sarge.
"Because Simmons is probably doing something productive and I would rather not get the blues involved with anything that has to do with me." Sarge said. He then looked at him with a evil smile. "It also helps that I love seeing you miserable."
"Well sorry to burst your bubble but I already have plans for today."
"Did I hear that right?" Sarge muttered as he stopped in his tracks and shook his head violently in disbelief. "You, of all people, have plans?"
"Yeah I was going to hang out with Fluttershy and probably sleep the day away."
"Those aren't plans." Sarge grunted.
"Right, because you're the one to talk to about flawless plans."
Fluttershy poked her head out the door and stared curiously at the pair.
"Well plans change." Sarge said, starting to drag Grif again.
"What are you going to be doing?" Fluttershy asked quietly.
"Applejack and I have a little thing going to see who is... well I don't know what it is we're doing exactly, but I sure as hell am not about to go and let her win without a fight."
"Then what am I supposed to do?" Grif asked. "I don't want to fucking compete."
"I don't want you to compete you idiot, I want you to think of things for us to do."
"Wait so let me get this straight." Grif blinked. "You want me... to make competitions for you and Applejack to compete in?"
"Yeah, your point?" Sarge asked bemusedly.
"Nothing." Grif coughed. "Sure why not, I guess I could do that."
"It wasn't your choice anyways, but at least now I won't have to drag you."
"Should I come too?" Fluttershy asked.
"Nah you stay here. Today is your day off, remember?" Grif stated with a smile.
Fluttershy nodded slowly as she met Grif's smile with her own.
"I think I'll be back pretty soon so just, well, do nothing I guess."
"Okay." Fluttershy said quietly.
"Alright so what kind of challenges should I make you guys do?" Grif asked as he started towards Sweet Apple Acres."
"They have to be an actual challenge for one." Sarge said as he hit Grif on the head. "Napping isn't a challenge so you can't make us do that. Do things that are hard to do that I wouldn't normally do. In other words tell us to do things you would never do.""
"Fine, I'll try to think of some stuff on the way." Grif muttered as he rubbed his head.
They quickly arrived at the farm to see Applejack tilling the soil with Big Mac, while the girls were still playing on the swing.
"Howdy Grif." Applejack greeted with sweat beading down her face.
"Hey." Grif greeted back.
"It's awfully nice of ya t' come on out here on yer own time."
"Thanks I guess." Grif said. He turned to the work horse who continued working silently. "Big Mac right?"
"Eeyup." Big Mac grunted as he continued tilling the dirt.
"Get any ideas 'bout some competitions?" Applejack asked.
"I have a few, can I just talk to you for a second?" Grif asked as he avoided Sarge's eye contact.
"Ah suppose." Applejack said.
"What do you have to say to her?" Sarge asked.
"That would ruin the surprise." Grif tutted as he walked away from Sarge with Applejack.
"Watcha want t' talk about Grif?" Applejack asked once they were out of Sarge’s hearing range.
"Just want to run through some challenge ideas with you."
"Alright, what didja have in mind?"
"First off what challenges have you guys done before?"
"Well, the first thing that started it all was me beatin' Sarge at an eatin' contest, but he got two points for buckin' apples and fightin' the timberwolves."
"Damn, he's in the lead?" Grif muttered. "Alright, now what are some of your special talents?"
"Special talents?" Applejack asked, tapping her chin lightly. "Well ah suppose ah'm good at cookin', and ah'm pretty good at herdin' critters."
"Great." Grif said with a smirk. "Let's go get started then, shall we?"
Applejack nodded and they made their way back to Sarge who was standing idly, watching Big Mac work.
"Okay, let's get this started so I can get home quickly."
"What makes you think it will be over quick?" Sarge asked.
"Oh no reason." Grif chuckled. "Let's get to the inside of the house for the first challenge."
"Inside? I told you no napping you dumbass."
"Don't worry Sarge I would never let you do something as artistic as napping."
"Then what're ya gunna make us do?" Applejack asked.
"For the first challenge you two are going to cook me up a little snack." Grif said.
"What?" Sarge exclaimed. "You must be out of your mind if you think I'm going to cook you anything."
"You told me you wanted a challenge. Well I'm giving you one." Grif chortled.
"Yeah, but I said they needed to be something that we would be even in. Something either both of us are good at or both of us are bad at."
"Actually Sarge, you told me to make you do things that you would never do." Grif chuckled. "You never said anything about me telling you to do things that you and Applejack were either good or bad at."
Sarge's entire body trembled in anticipation as he got ready to beat Grif to his ass for the second time that day.
"It's either you do this or you give up and give her a point by default." Grif quickly added.
"Now hang on there, ah don't think ah kin do a challenge if ah have th' upper hoof." Applejack said.
"You guys asked me to come here and give you guys something to do.” Grif said as a smile crept onto his muzzle. “Well I went out of my way on my own time to come here and give you something to do, so as far as I'm concerned whoever forfeits first gives the other a point."
Applejack shared a glance with Sarge. "He has a point." Applejack said. "We did make him come over here."
"This doesn't exactly seem fair." Sarge grunted.
"It isn't." Grif snickered. "Now hurry up I'm starting to get hungry."
Sarge grumbled as he slowly walked towards the house, Applejack quickly following his lead.
"I can just tell this is going to be a good day." Grif said before walking after them.
"You better have thought up more than just one competition." Sarge muttered as he opened the door.
"Alright, what else did you say you were good at? Herding or whatever? We'll do that after if you want Sarge."
"What about something that I'm good at?" Sarge muttered.
"Well the only thing you're good at is trying to kill me." Grif replied. He turned to Applejack and raised his brow. "And I don't think she seems like one to kill someone for no reason."
"Lucky you." Sarge grunted.
"Let's get started shall we?"
"Ah'll start." Applejack said as she grabbed a tray from beside the oven.
"Are you as excited as I am Sarge?" Grif asked.
"What the hell do you think?" Sarge muttered.
"It's all going according to plan then." Grif smiled.
After a few hours Applejack pulled the tray filled with pastries out of the oven and placed it on the table. Grif stared at them briefly before shrugging and popping one in his mouth.
"These are good." Grif said thoughtfully as he threw another in his mouth. "What are these?"
"Bite sized apple tarts. They're mah own special recipe." Applejack beamed.
"Well, you're up next Sarge." Grif said as he funneled the tray of tarts into his mouth.
Sarge did not budge, instead he continued to glare at Grif who was giving him a smug look.
"What are you waiting for?" Grif asked.
"This is a lose-lose situation for me. Either I cook well enough for you to give me the damn point, or I give up and Applejack gets the point."
"Well if you don't think you're up to it..." Grif coughed.
"There is no challenge that I won't do."
"Chop chop then Sarge, I am growing impatient." Grif said with glee.
"You two, leave." Sarge grunted as he pushed Applejack and Grif towards the door.
"But I wanted to watch you cook." Grif said sarcastically.
Sarge slammed the door and Applejack looked at Grif.
"Ya shouldn't egg him on like that." Applejack said.
"If you were me you would take any chance you could to get him back."
"Do ya think he has a chance?" Applejack asked after a brief moment of silence.
"None at all, that's what is making this so perfect."
"D'ya always treat each other like this? Ya'd think that you would have a decent level of respect for one 'nother after all ya've been through togeth-."
"I'm just going to stop you right there." Grif said, shaking his head slightly. "We haven't gone through anything together. It's always been me thrown in front and used as a meat shield to let them run."
"Whadya mean by that?" Applejack asked.
"I'll just let Sarge tell you later, I'm sure he would love to tell you about his oh so fond memories."
Roughly an hour later, Sarge emerged from the kitchen and put an extremely burnt... something... in front of Grif. Grif took a fork and broke off a piece of it and bit it.
"It's not bad, actually." Grif said.
"Are you joking?" Sarge asked.
"Yes, it's fucking awful." Grif chuckled. "Applejack wins, we're done here."
"That was only one competition." Sarge yelled.
"Yeah... payback is a bitch, isn't it Sarge?"
"Yeah, now I'm about to get mine." Sarge muttered, getting up
"Sarge, what'd he mean by payback?" Applejack asked.
Sarge stopped dead in his tracks before he hit Grif, turning back to Applejack with a blank expression.
"Well seeing as he probably won't tell you I will. Ever since I got drafted Sarge has made my life a living hell. He's shot me, hit me, yelled at me and almost all of his plans involve me dying or, in the very least, crippling me.
"Sarge, is that true?" Applejack asked.
"Yeah but look at him, he needs to have sense knocked into him." Sarge protested.
"And get this, Sarge made Fluttershy cry and he apologized instantly without a moment’s hesitation." Grif said.
"That's because I have standards for who I beat, like you and the blues." Sarge said seriously. "Girls are fragile and weak and have to be treated like so."
Applejack's eyes flared and she bucked Sarge in the jaw.
"Son of a bitch." Sarge grunted. "What was that for?"
"Fragile and weak?" Applejack asked with a certain fire in her eyes.
"Er, that is, I meant-"
"Oh this is just perfect." Grif through bouts of laughter.
"Shut it." Sarge and Applejack said together, sobering Grif immediately.
"Now Sarge, this is what has t' happen." Applejack muttered. "Ah want you to apologize to me and more importantly, ah wantcha t' apologize t' Grif."
"What?" Sarge yelled. "I'll say sorry to you, but there is no way I'm apologizing to that sack of shit."
"Well Sarge, it seems to me that there is one challenge that you won't do." Grif said.
Sarge glared at Grif for a hard ten seconds, he slowly turned to talk to Applejack when she lifted her hoof and pointed it at Grif.
"C'mon Sarge, after all ya put him through he at least deserves t' hear it once." Applejack said. "And if ya want t' keep on bein' respected by me n' mah family's eyes ya gotta do it."
"You have no idea what you're talking abou-"
Applejack pointed her hoof at Grif once again, but this time accompanying it with a hard look. Sarge lowered his head and looked at the ground with a sneer. He turned to Grif and slowly started to walk up to him. Grif sat on the ground, hooves over his mouth in an attempt to hide the biggest grin of his life.
Oh my god he is actually going to go through with it. Grif thought to himself.
"Grif." Sarge said hesitantly in an extremely forced tone. "I think there is something I-"
"Yes Sarge, what is it you want to tell me?" Grif cooed.
"I wanted to tell you-"
"Yes?" Grif interrupted innocently.
"Sorry." Sarge grumbled quietly.
"What was that? I didn't quite hear you."
"I... said... sorry." Sarge sputtered, pausing to gag after every word.
"One more time."
"You're pushing what little luck you have left..." Sarge said in a strained voice.
"Sarge." Applejack called out.
"God dammit." Sarge muttered. He looked up at Grif and cleared his throat. "I am sorry Grif."
Grif fell on his back with laughter, eyes starting to water because of his laughing.
"See what you did?" Sarge asked Applejack. "Now I'll never hear the end of this."
"This is... the greatest day... of my life... ever... of all time." Grif said breathlessly through his laughter.
Over at the Carousel Boutique Simmons shuddered violently and he looked around.
"What is it Simmons, are you alright?" Rarity asked.
"I think so." Simmons said. He walked up to the window and looked outside. "For some reason I feel like hell froze just froze over."
Sarge ran to the sink and started scrubbing his tongue as Grif continued laughing on the floor.
"You two ain't right in th' head, y'know that?" Applejack asked.
"I've been saying that for years." Church said from the doorway.
"Howdy Church." Applejack said, tipping her hat ever so slightly.
"Hey." Church said. He looked between Grif and Sarge a few times before turning to Applejack and giving her an inquisitive look.
"Long story." Applejack chuckled dryly. "What kin ah do fer ya?"
"Twilight wanted me to get you for some reason."
"She didn't tell ya wha’?"
"No, but everybody has secrets and I can respect that."
"Gimme a sec t' talk t' these two."
"Take all the time you need." Church said, stepping back outside.
"Your name is Church, right?" A small voice came from below Church.
Church looked down to see the trio of fillies staring at him.
"Yeah, why?" Church asked.
"Sarge has told us a lot about you." Sweetie Belle said.
"Fascinating." Church said sarcastically.
"Hey... ya don't have yer cutie mark neither!" Applebloom said.
"Your point?" Church asked.
"Well it's just that all th' others have 'em, but you're the only one without it. Other ponies must think ya look weird."
"Again... your point?"
"You don't care?" Scootaloo asked.
"No, why should I?" Church scoffed. "As far as I'm concerned I already know who I am, I don't need any tattoo on my ass to tell me who I am."
"But... you're not sad that you don't know what your special talent is?"
"Not at all. I'm perfectly fine with just having people that I can talk to rather than people that are trying to hurt me." Church chuckled. "Having a need to find out who you are just so you look better in the eyes of others who you don't even know is... well kind of shallow to be honest. You should just be happy with your friends because in the end they're the only people you can count on."
The girls looked at each other as the door opened and Applejack came out.
"You ready to go?" Church asked.
"Yeah." Applejack said. She put her head through the door and looked at Sarge and Grif. "Now play nice with each other."
"Where's the fun in that?" Sarge muttered.
Applejack rolled her eyes as Sarge and Grif made their way past Church.
"Where are they going?"
"Well ah'd say they're in a time out fer now. Grif made Sarge angry and now Sarge has t' bring Grif home without, well killin' him ah guess."
"Aiming a little high, aren't we?" Church laughed.
"Pretty much, let's git goin'." Applejack said, closing the door behind her and nodded. Applejack and Church had started towards the library as the girls ran off. "What were ya talkin' t' the girls about if ya don't mind me askin'?"
"They brought up how I'm the only one of us guys without a cutie mark and they also asked if others find it weird."
"Sorry 'bout that, I'll tell 'em t' mind their own busines-"
"No harm was done so I see no point in it." Church shrugged.
"What'd ya say in return then?"
"I told them the truth."
"Truth?" Applejack echoed.
"I told them that they shouldn't care how others see them. The only thing you should care about is how your friends perceive you."
"That's quite some insightful advice there Church."
"I try." Church said. "So, do you think those two will make it back alright."
"Celestia as mah witness, ah'd be lyin' if ah told ya ah thought they would make it twenty paces."
"So how do you put up with Sarge anyways?" Church asked after a few minutes.
"There ain't much t' put up with. He's helpful, has a strong back, he's a heck of a competitor..."
"Right that whole tournament thing. How is that going?"
"We're tied at two n' two. I reckon it'll be a big one to figure out who wins."
"Well I hope to be there to see you drive his face into the ground." Church chuckled.
"Speakin' of face hurtin', I wonder how Grif and Sarge are farin'." Applejack said.
Fluttershy was napping on the couch when she heard a knock on the door. She opened it and looked outside and saw Sarge looking at the ground with a smirk. She looked down to where Sarge was looking and saw Grif crawling on the ground with a black eye and feathers torn out of his wings.
"Grif what happened?" Fluttershy gasped, helping him up to his feet.
"Pissed... Sarge off." Grif coughed, spitting up a little blood. "Totally... worth it."
Sarge punched Grif in the side of the head. Fluttershy gave Sarge a look of anger and Sarge felt a wave of unease course through his body.
"How dare you?" Fluttershy snapped.
"Wha-" Sarge started.
"What did Grif do to you that would make you do that to him?" Fluttershy asked.
"Well he-"
"No." Fluttershy interrupted violently. "There is nothing he could have done that could be so bad that you needed to hurt him this much!"
"He went out of his way t-"
"I do not want to hear excuses. I would appreciate if you leave before I'm forced to do something we'll all regret."
"I am not afraid of you." Sarge said boldly.
Fluttershy's eyes shot wide as she glared at Sarge. Sarge sank to the ground and started to shake. Grif watched silently, not because he was enjoying it, but because he was starting to grow scared.
"Okay, I get it, just stop with that damn stare." Sarge sputtered.
"Leave." Fluttershy said simply.
Sarge said nothing, but turned tail and fled for Sweet Apple Acres. Fluttershy smiled and walked happily back inside. Grif watched in disbelief as Sarge ran away.
"Are you coming in Grif?" Fluttershy asked sweetly.
Grif shook the fear off and smiled.
"Just when I thought this day couldn't get any better, you go and do that." Grif laughed as he hugged Fluttershy playfully. "That was fucking hilarious."
"Oh, t-thank you." Fluttershy blushed. She remembered the condition Grif was in and looked him over. "I think I may need to treat your cuts and bruises..."
"That's what tomorrow is for." Grif dismissed casually. "Today is still your day off."
Fluttershy smiled and nodded as they made their way to the back yard together.
"So." Tucker muttered as he sat at the kitchen table.
"So what?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Are we just going to sit around all day?"
"I don't know about you, but I have work to do today so you'll be by yourself for about ten hours."
"I didn't know you had a job. When we needed money for the Wonderbolts you asked the others for work instead of going to an actual job. You actually seemed more like a free... lan... cer."
"What's wrong?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Oh, nothing." Tucker muttered as he shook his head "But I just mean you seemed to be more of a... free agent I guess."
"I go on weather duty every once and a while. How else do you think I pay for everything?"
"I think you would hit me if I answered that." Tucker chuckled. "So what's weather duty?"
"It's exactly what it sounds like. The pegasi have the weather for Cloudsdale and the surrounding areas planned out and it's up to us - well not you because you would probably screw it up - to ensure that everything goes according to plan and there are no stray rain clouds or strong winds."
"So you push clouds around and get paid for it? That sounds easy."
"It's not. Some clouds are dangerous."
"Right." Tucker rolled his eyes. "Think I could help?"
"Here I thought you would just be the one to avoid work all day."
"Well as much as I am a fan of sitting around all day I need to find a way to make money. I'm tired of eating the same crap every day."
"I don't think anybody else could handle you."
"What, you want to be the only one who handles me?" Tucker laughed. "Bow chicka bow wow."
Rainbow Dash hit him in the side of the head, knocking him off the chair.
"Dammit what the hell Dash?"
"You're terrible." Rainbow Dash snickered.
"Yeah, but that's why you keep me around." Tucker said, getting off the floor. "So can I go or what?"
"I don't know, you would have to go see Inclement Storm about that. He is the one who is in charge of workers this time of the year."
"Alright where do I find this guy?"
"He's usually in the weather dome in Cloudsdale."
"Aren't you going to show me?"
"No, if I do I'll be late and I can't hold your hoof the entire time you're here."
"Spoilsport." Tucker pouted sarcastically.
"Just go to the Cloudaseum and ask around." Rainbow Dash groaned. "You should be able to get directions as long as you don't make a plot out of yourself."
"Where's the fun in that?"
"I seriously have to go so do whatever you want."
"Whatever I want?" Tucker asked.
"Everything except for whatever you're thinking now." Rainbow Dash said as she flew straight out the door.
Tucker flew over to the Cloudaseum and looked for someone to ask for directions. He came across a light blue female pegasus with spiky white and blue hair.
"Hey can you help me?" Tucker asked the pegasus.
"Whoa I like your hair." The pegasus said.
"Thanks I guess... who are you?"
"My name is Cloud Chaser. How can I help you?"
"Uh yeah, do you know where the weather building is?"
Cloud Chaser smiled and pointed to a building.
"Thanks." Tucker nodded.
"May I ask what you are going there for?"
"I'm going to try and get hired I guess."
"You guess?" Cloud Chaser asked with a raised brow. "I don't think that Inclement Storm would hire somepony as impulsive as you."
"Yeah well Rainbow Dash doesn't exactly have a wide variety of food at her place."
"Oh you're related to Rainbow Dash?"
"No I'm staying at her place."
"Oh... you mean like in the same room?"
"Yeah, listen thanks for the directions."
"No problem, um. I don't think I got your name."
"My name is Tucker." Tucker said as he turned to walk away. "Sorry but I have to get going."
"I should get going too." Cloud Chaser smiled. "It was nice to meet you Tucker."
Tucker made his way inside the building and looked around. There was a large dark gray pegasus with blue and gray hair sitting at a desk writing on a piece of paper. Tucker stared at him in silence, waiting for him to acknowledge he was there.
"Can I help you?" The large pegasus asked without turning to greet Tucker.
"Yeah do you know where Inclement Storm is?" Tucker asked.
"You're speaking to him." Inclement Storm said. He stopped writing on the paper and placed it in one of the desk's drawers. "What can I do for you?"
"Can I have a job?" Tucker asked without batting an eye.
Inclement Storm rubbed his temples and stared at Tucker with a hard look.
"You think you can handle it?" Inclement Storm questioned.
"Totally." Tucker replied.
"Boys get in here." Inclement Storm called out. "We have a new guy here."
Three male pegasi scrambled in from the other room and saluted.
"Didn't know I was signing up for the army for a second time." Tucker muttered. "Who are these guys?"
"Score." The light brown pegasus said. "The big gray guy is Hoops, and the other one is Dumb-Bell."
"Boys this is Tucker. He is our newest recruit so you'll have to run him through the drills."
"Wait, drills? Didn't I just get hired?"
"Listen kid, we can't just hand out jobs to every schmuck who comes in here thinking they're hot stuff."
"It's moving clouds, how much training could I need to do that?" Tucker asked.
"You're not from around here, are you?"
"I guess you could say that." Tucker admitted.
"C'mon Tucker, stick with us and we'll teach you all you need to know." Score laughed.
"How long is this going to take?" Tucker asked quietly.
"That depends on a lot of things."
"Like?"
"Like how fast you fly, how long you can fly for... that sort of stuff."
"You know. Endurance, strength and all that stuff." Hoops said.
"I'm good at that." Tucker shrugged.
"We'll see." Score chuckled. "Come in to the gym and we'll get started."
Church and Applejack arrived at the library to find that the door had been locked. Church knocked on the door and looked through the window.
"Twilight, you still here?" Church called out.
"Maybe she left t' go check on something." Applejack suggested.
"You think she would have left a note or something."
Church looked through the window once again and saw a note on the table.
"Looks like she did leave a note. It just happens t' be in th' wrong place." Applejack said.
"Why are you two out here?" Twilight asked as she came up from behind them.
"Well you seem to have locked us out." Church said.
Twilight walked up to the door and opened it. She turned to Church and raised her brow.
"Doesn't seem t' be locked no more." Applejack snickered.
"I could have sworn."
"Listen Church, do you mind waiting out here or going for a walk? I need to discuss with Applejack in private."
"Not a problem." Church said.
Church decided that rather sit on the grass he would go for a walk around Ponyville for a few minutes, and when he got back he saw Applejack leaving.
"Looks like I came back just in time." Church said.
"Ah guess ya did." Applejack laughed.
"What did Twilight need to talk to you about?"
"Oh just stuff." Applejack said as she broke eye contact. "See ya around Church."
"See you later." Church nodded and walked into the library.
"I'm glad you're getting along with the others." Twilight smiled.
"Why wouldn't I be? Your friends are... well better people than I've ever met."
"Why would you say that?"
"Well you guys aren't the lying slash killing types." Church chuckled.
"You're in a different world now." Twilight smiled.
Church thought about bringing up the fact that they were just in the Epsilon unit but decided not to.
"So what did you need to talk to Applejack about?" Church asked.
"She was just giving me some papers." Twilight said quietly.
"Papers? She didn't seem like the scholarly type to me. Then again I never really was a good judge of character. What did they say?"
"I don't think you would really be too interested in it." Twilight coughed awkwardly.
"That's okay, I'm used to having everybody I meet keep secrets from me."
"I'm sorry Church I would love to tell you but I am not allowed to."
"Listen you can just tell me you don't want to tell me, you don't have to say someone forbade you from doing so."
"I can tell you that it was Princess Celestia that didn't want me to tell you."
"Celestia? What does she have against me?" Church asked.
"That I do not know. Maybe it has something to do with you being from a different world."
"That would make sense." Church shrugged. "Oh well, if you can't tell me you can't tell me. I won't push the matter any further."
"Thank you." Twilight said happily.
"But if I were to push it further..." Church said jokingly.
"I would tell you no yet again." Twilight laughed.
"Damn. It was worth a shot. By the way Fluttershy may come by soon for you to check up on Grif again."
"Why would she do that?"
"Well if I'm right then Grif should be hospitalized right now."
"Hospitalized? Why would you think that?" Twilight asked stiffly.
"I'm not too sure on the details, but Applejack is having a competition with Sarge and they asked Grif to come up with something for them to test their mettle. Then Grif went out of his way to make Sarge lose a challenge and Applejack made Sarge escort Grif back home to settle their differences."
"That doesn't seem so..." Twilight trailed off as her mind processed this. "You really think it would be that bad?"
"From what I've seen Sarge loves pride more than anything else, so being essentially forced to lose wouldn't be his most favorite thing in the world. Most of the things he did when we were fighting each other - well I guess we kind of still are - but when we first started fighting, like before the whole freelancers thing"
"I see. Maybe we should go check on them..."
"Maybe we should." Church nodded.
Back in Cloudsdale, Tucker followed Score into the gym area where there were multiple stations set up.
"Alright here is the bench press, to the left is the leg press." Hoops said. "At the opposite end we have the trotmill and the chin up bar-"
"What does this have to do with pushing clouds?" Tucker asked.
"You have to keep in shape with this kind of job. You're flying for hours without letting up."
"Well then why isn't there anything here to work on your wings?"
"When you're flying you're not just relying on your wings, you need everything in working condition to be able to fly with precision." Score answered. "You're one of those grounders, aren't you?"
"What the hell is a grounder?"
"They're what we call the pegasi who ditch the skies and stick to the soil. It's a shame too, turning their backs on the most important ponies in Equestria. Without us pegasi the earth ponies crops would either flood or dry up and the unicorns would starve with them."
"Maybe they're like me and just thought flying isn't exactly something I thought I would be doing for a living."
"Well all that matters is that you're back to the clouds where you belong." Dumb-Bell laughed.
"Enough with the talking, get your flanks in gear." Inclement Storm called out from the other room.
"Man that guy seems like a dick." Tucker muttered.
"He kind of is, but he keeps everypony under control and makes sure they don't do anything stupid."
"And here I thought pushing clouds was going to be easy..." Tucker muttered. "Alright, what are we going to do first?"
"Pick a station and work on it until you drop." Score said as he ran up to the chin up bar.
"I got the dumbbells." Dumb-Bell said, running to the dumbbells.
"I got the bench press." Hoops said.
"I should have just stayed and slept in." Tucker muttered.
Tucker and the others had been exercising for an hour when Score walked up to Tucker who was still on the trotmill.
"You ready to start sparring?" Score asked.
"Wait, sparring?" Tucker asked. "You mean like fighting?"
"Yeah, it's fun and it's great exercise. You don't want to end up like some other grounders we know and not stay in shape."
"Fine. Am I going to be sparring you?"
"Nah, Dumb-Bell said that he wanted to test you since he is the best fighter of the three of us."
"Great." Tucker muttered. "Might as well I guess."
"Good to see you're just like us." Score smiled. "Yo Dumb-Bell, Tucker is up for it."
"Awesome, bring him over." Dumb-Bell called from the other side.
Tucker and Score made their way over to Dumb-Bell and Hoops who were setting up a series of mats made out of cloud on the ground. Once there was a big enough area Dumb-Bell motioned to one corner and made his way to the opposite one.
"Any specific rules I should know about?" Tucker asked.
"No rules. Except for the obvious no making the other go to the hospital."
"This keeps sounding better and better." Tucker groaned.
"Are you a stallion or a filly?" Dumb-Bell laughed as he cracked his neck. "I'll go easy on you."
"Oh I wasn't worried about that." Tucker smirked. "I was worried about you."
"Vain. I like that in sparring partners, makes it funnier when I beat them." Dumb-Bell beamed. "Call it."
"Ready." Hoops asked to which Tucker and Dumb-Bell both nodded. "Spar!"
Dumb-Bell flew straight at Tucker but he rolled out of the way and sprung to his feet. Dumb-Bell flew back around and tackled Tucker to the ground just to be thrown off in half of a second.
"Y'know Tucker I've been wondering where are you from?" Score asked as Dumb Bell threw a punch at Tucker which he promptly blocked.
"Long story." Tucker said as he countered with his own punch.
"It can't be that bad." Hoops said.
"No I mean it really is a long story." Tucker grunted as Dumb Bell punched Tucker's fore leg away and hit him in the chest.
"Nice hit Dumb Bell." Score laughed. "Well where have you been living? Anywhere around here?"
"I've been living near, what's that place called, Ponyville." Tucker said as he use his other fore leg to connect with Dumb-Bell's jaw.
"Good one Tucker." Hoops said. " I thought you just said Ponyville."
"I did." Tucker said.
Dumb-Bell punched Tucker in the throat, sending him crashing to the gorund.
"What the fuck dude, cheap shot." Tucker said, getting back up.
"Sorry." Dumb-Bell chuckled.
Tucker rolled to his feet and continued to spar.
"So. Ponyville." Hoops said.
"Yeah, what of it?" Tucker asked as he parried another hit.
"I know you said that you didn't live in Cloudsdale, but I didn't expect you to be living in that lame place."
"It's not so bad." Tucker said idly. He paused and shrugged. "Well I can't really say that since the only other person I hang out with is the girl I live with."
"Ohh, Tucker's living with a girl." Score teased. "Do you do each other’s hair while you're there?"
"What's her name?" Hoops asked curiously.
"Rainbow Dash." Tucker said simply, blocking another one of Dumb-Bell's punches.
"You've been staying with Rainbow Crash?" Hoops whooped. "That's hilarious!"
"Rainbow Crash?" Tucker asked.
"Yeah she's a real loser." Dumb-Bell laughed.
Tucker's front right leg started to spark as he hit Dumb Bell in the gut, which sent smashed him into the ground.
"That was awesome!" Dumb-Bell said as he sat up to continue fighting.
Tucker revved back his fore leg and punched again, this time there was the sound of thunder and Dumb-Bell crashed into the wall and became lodged in it.
"What in Celestia's name are you doing?" Score asked.
"I'm sparring." Tucker said.
"That was too cool." Dumb-Bell said shakily as he slowly managed to get out of the wall.
"You okay Dumb-Bell?" Hoops asked.
"Never better." Dumb-Bell said with a rough smile. "Where'd you learn to do that?"
"I didn't learn it from anywhere." Tucker said. "I kind of just know how to do it."
"Would you say it makes you a better fighter?" Hoops asked hesitantly.
"I guess so, yeah."
"Interesting. You guys thinking what I'm thinking?"
Score and Hoops smirked and nodded. Score lunged at Tucker and jumped on his back. Tucker quickly threw him off just to be tackled by Hoops.
"The fuck is this?" Tucker asked as he slammed Hoops onto the ground.
"A little thing we do around here is whenever a fighter beats the reigning champion everyone fights him." Hoops chuckled as he got off the ground.
"What's the point of that?"
"To take him down." Dumb-Bell laughed. "And it's pretty fun. But more importantly it's great exercise."
"You should have seen it when Dumb-Bell won. We slammed him so fast." Hoops said.
"It took you guys a good few minutes to do that."
"More like thirty seconds." Score laughed.
"What are we waiting for then? Get him!" Hoops jeered.
Back in the main room a pegasus came in and gave a note to Inclement Storm. He quickly read the note and rolled his eyes before throwing the note in the trash. He got out of the chair and opened the door to the gym and saw Tucker throwing Dumb-Bell on top of Hoops and Score.
"Not laughing now, are you?" Tucker laughed gleefully.
"What are you doing?" Inclement Storm muttered.
"Well me and Dumb-Bell sparred and I won."
"So they teamed up on you." Inclement Storm finished icily. Storm turned his attention to the three on the ground and glared at them. "What did I say about that?"
"You told us it was stupid." Dumb-Bell said flatly.
"I don't want to be down one worker just because you guys want to team up on someone. Especially when the one you're fighting is a new recruit."
"To be honest that was actually kind of fun." Tucker said
"Right." Inclement Storm rolled his eyes. "It turns out that one of the other workers got sick, so I'll need one of you three to take over."
"Why don't we let the new guy go out?" Score said. "He's pretty good for a grounder."
"Well for one he doesn't know the proper procedures, and another he doesn't look like he is used to training for hours a day."
"Just let me do it, I'll have my work done in record time." Tucker said.
"You know what? Go ahead. I don't even care who goes out there right now, just get it done."
Tucker nodded and made his way towards the door.
"And Tucker? Don't disappoint."
"I can't promise that much."
"Tucker, you're going to the Ponyville Library and working above it and the surrounding area." Inclement Storm said before Tucker left. "Just make sure to clean up the sky and don't hurt yourself. Come back when you're done and we'll give you your pay. If you perform the task to expectations, that is."
"I hope your expectations aren't too high." Tucker said jokingly.
"Don't worry they're pretty low. They always are for the new hires." Inclement Storm grunted. "Now get moving before I regret letting you do this."
Tucker nodded and made his way to the Ponyville library and saw Twilight and Church walking on a trail.
"What are you doing here?" Church asked as Tucker flew towards them.
"Well I got hired to clear the skies above Twilight's house." Tucker said.
"Wait... you got a job?" Church asked in disbelief.
"Yeah, so?"
"Why would you do that?"
"Well Dash doesn't have the biggest selection of food so I'm trying to get some cash so I can buy some actual food." Tucker shrugged.
"But an actual job? I would have expected you to try to sleep around for money." Church said. He thought about that for a second then smiled. "Never mind, I don't think anybody in their right mind would pay to sleep with you."
"Don't be jealous that you aren't getting any action."
"I'm willing to bet that you aren't either."
"What are you talkin’ ‘bout?" Tucker said in an annoyed voice. "I'm totally getting some."
"Interesting." Twilight hummed as she tapped her chin.
"What's on your mind?" Church asked.
"Tucker would you have describe yourself as a... how should I put this... sexually active male before you arrived here?"
"I guess so... I mean yeah, totally."
"And what food did you have when you were stationed in... Blood Gulch."
"Well it was mostly the same stuff I guess."
"Mhm. So you stayed in that place for a few years eating the same food? Did you ever complain about the food during that time?"
"No, and what do you think you are? My therapist?"
"I don't think you're getting a job for food." Twilight said suddenly, ignoring Tucker’s question. "I believe you're getting a job to release all of your pent up tension since you are not performing certain activities."
"What?" Tucker coughed. "No, no. No that's not it, I told you that I'm getting a job because I want to eat something else other than the same shit!"
"If I'm not mistaken, I'd say that Twilight just struck a nerve." Church chuckled.
"Fuck you, I need to go. I have a job to do." Tucker scowled flying off towards a group of clouds.
Twilight watched Tucker fly to the clouds, feeling guilty about what she’d just said to the stallion.
"Maybe I shouldn't have said anything." Twilight said quietly.
"Are you kidding?" Church laughed. "I think you just made my day."
"Really?"
"When it comes to making people mad, Tucker is really hard. He’s had it coming for a long time."
"What'd you say about me being hard?" Tucker asked as he kicked a cloud into oblivion. "Bow chicka - as well as me coming - bow wow."
"See what I mean?" Church groaned. "Let's get to Fluttershy's place so we don't have to see Tucker release his tension."
Tucker glared at Church as he and Twilight continued down the trail. Suddenly he felt a tap on his shoulder and he whipped around with a vicious glare.
"Woah, what's the matter?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Oh, nothing. Don't worry about it." Tucker said with a nervous chuckle, shaking the glare off of his face. "Well I have some clouds to destroy."
"You got hired? Nicely done." Rainbow Dash smiled.
"Yeah. Wasn't a fan of the training exercises though..."
"Training exercises?" Rainbow Dash repeated. "What training exercises?"
"When I went in and asked for a job I got sent to the back with a couple guys..." Tucker said, stopping mid sentence.
"That's a good move. You need to keep limber for this sort of thing."
"Yeah, everybody keeps telling me this cloud stuff is hard but I still can't believe it." Tucker shrugged. "Also the guys training me didn't seem to like you very much."
"What are you talking about? Everypony in Cloudsdale loves me."
"Well Hoops called you Rainbow Crash and then Dumb-Bell-"
"You've been talking to those guys?" Rainbow Dash interrupted angrily. "Why in Equestria would you do that? They're the stupidest pegasi in all of Cloudsdale!"
"Calm down. It's not like I'm not hanging out with them or anything."
"Well... good."
"I actually fought Dumb-Bell too."
"You're just as stupid as them." Rainbow Dash said as she let out a disappointed sigh. "Dumb-Bell may be an idiot but he is supposed to be one of the best fighters around."
"He isn't that good. Actually, when he called you a loser I sort of kicked his ass into a wall."
"It's about time those guys got shut u- wait. You won?"
"Yeah."
"Did they do that stupid thing where they all jump you and hit you until you fall?"
"Sorta, except I was the one who threw their asses down."
Rainbow Dash suddenly threw herself over Tucker and kissed him.
"I can't wait to rub it in their faces when we get back." Rainbow Dash snickered as she brought herself away from Tucker. She looked at Tucker who was smiling at her. "What are you looking at?"
"I was beginning to think I was still on your shit list after I told you about those guys."
"Well, y'know... those guys are jerks and I'm happy to see them put in their place."
"How many times will I have to put them in their place before we take this further?" Tucker asked with a raised brow.
"Every time you bring it up I put it further down on my to do list."
"So it's on your to do list?" Tucker asked. "What else is on that list?"
"I don't know, I haven't hit you in a while so that might get pushed up higher. What do you think?"
"As much as I am a fan of that I think I'll pass." Tucker muttered, knowing full well the difference between the interpretations.
"Good to hear it. Let's get to work." Rainbow Dash said as she kicked a cloud.
Tucker and Rainbow Dash spent the next few hours pushing and kicking the clouds around the library out of the sky. Once they were near completion Rainbow Dash sat on a cloud and put her forelegs behind her head. Tucker followed her lead and did the same thing on the cloud adjacent to her,
"I'm surprised you didn't screw up." Rainbow Dash said as she yawned.
"It's. Just. Clouds." Tucker retorted lightly. "Stop trying to tell me it's hard to do when it's really not."
"Just take the compliment." Rainbow Dash said as she kicked the cloud away and flew up to Tucker. "You did pretty well out there."
"I'm just good at everything I do, that's all."
Rainbow Dash punched Tucker in the back of the head, causing the cloud to disintegrate. Tucker stopped himself before he slammed into the ground and glared at Rainbow Dash.
"The fuck was that for?" Tucker muttered.
"You don't have to be so cocky." Rainbow Dash chuckled.
"But it's one of my most notable traits."
"Among other things." Rainbow Dash said, rolling her eyes playfully.
"Thanks." Tucker winked.
"That wasn't a compliment." Rainbow Dash muttered.
"So what do we do now?" Tucker asked as he flew back up to Rainbow Dash.
"How about we pick up our pay and grab a bite to eat?"
"Cool with me." Tucker shrugged.
Tucker and Rainbow Dash flew to the weather control building and went to the front desk where there was a pink pegasus writing on a schedule, paying no notice to them.
"Where's the boss?" Tucker coughed.
"He is in the back office." The pony at the desk said happily, even though she had not looked up to see them. "It's located on the other side of the gym, you can't miss it."
"Come on let's hurry this up I'm starting to get hungry." Rainbow Dash said as she pushed Tucker ahead of her.
Rainbow Dash and Tucker made their way to the back office. Before Tucker opened the door Rainbow Dash stopped him.
"What's wrong?" Tucker asked.
"Nothing, he just doesn't like paying wages in front of others." Rainbow Dash explained quickly.
"Okay." Tucker said simply. "I guess I'll just wait out here."
Rainbow Dash nodded and knocked on the door.
"Come in Rainbow Dash." Inclement Storm said.
"How did he know it was you?"
"Once you've been here for a few weeks he can distinguish who is knocking by how hard they knock." Rainbow Dash explained.
"Hurry it up, I don't pay idle hooves." Inclement Storm muttered.
Rainbow Dash trotted into the room and shut the door behind her. Score, Hoops and Dumb-Bell approached Tucker with wide smiles.
"Hey man I heard about what's been going on! Why didn't you tell us?" Hoops asked.
"Tell you what?" Tucker asked.
"You could totally get any girl you wanted, so why her?" Score asked.
"What the hell are you talking about?" Tucker muttered.
"Like you don't know." Dumb-Bell chuckled.
Rainbow Dash came out of the room and smiled at Tucker as she tucked a small bag under her wing.
"Well if it isn't Rainbow Crash." Dumb-Bell greeted happily.
"Well if it isn't jerk, idiot and stupid." Rainbow Dash snapped.
"Hey keep it cool you guys." Tucker said. "I'm not good with bits and pieces."
"Just grab your money and we can leave." Rainbow Dash said snidely.
Tucker nodded and went into the back office to find Inclement Storm sorting through an assortment of bits.
"Sup." Tucker greeted, causing Inclement Storm to slowly look up at Tucker.
"Well done out there." Inclement Storm said quietly, tossing a small bag of bits at Tucker.
"So does that mean I'm hired or whatever?" Tucker asked as he looked through his pay.
"Or whatever." Inclement Storm nodded. "Just come back next week and I'll give you a schedule."
"Alright, thanks."
"Say Tucker, the boys were telling me about what you did to Dumb-Bell."
"Shit, right. Sorry about that." Tucker said as he rubbed his neck nervously. "And sorry about the wall."
"Don't worry about the wall, it is easily replaceable." Inclement Storm laughed roughly. "As for Dumb-Bell... that kid can take a thrashing so no worries about him either. But they told me they saw lightning shoot out of your hoof when you hit him, is that on the nose?"
"Yeah I can sort of use lightning or whatever." Tucker said, making a small spit of electricity shoot out of his hoof.
"Interesting." Inclement Storm said. "Maybe you can handle some of the worse off areas of the sky with ease then."
"What do you mean?"
"There are some clouds out there that are filled with an unnatural electric current and none of the others can push it without suffering from severe burns. Maybe since you seem to be able to manipulate lightning you could do it. What do you think?"
"Does it pay more?"
"I like you." Inclement Storm extended his hoof and laughed, this time wholeheartedly. "Yes, it will pay more."
"Then I'm in." Tucker said, shaking Inclement Storm's hoof.
"Glad to hear it. Now get out of my office." Inclement Storm said, his voice immediately removing any trace of his laughter.
Tucker nodded hesitantly and walked out and found no sign of Rainbow Dash. Hoops and Score were off exercising while Dumb-Bell just sat near the door.
"Where's Dash?" Tucker asked.
"She left after you went in. Something about us being idiots." Dumb-Bell shrugged.
"Great." Tucker muttered. "I guess I'm going to go."
"See you next time Mr. Crash." Score called out.
"How about you guys just stop calling her that?" Tucker said forcibly.
"We're just kidding around." Hoops said.
"I've only heard you guys call her that a few times and it's already annoying me."
The three guys looked at each other and then back to Tucker.
"Tell you what, you're a good guy so we'll try." Score said.
"But we can't promise anything." Hoops finished.
"If I hear you call her it again I'll slam you into the ground again." Tucker warned.
"We'll be ready for it next time." Hoops said.
"Sure you will. See you guys later." Tucker said as he left the gym.
Tucker flew back to Rainbow Dash's place expecting her to be there. He opened the door and dropped the pouch of money on the table, when suddenly pain shot through the back of his head and he collapsed into an unconscious heap.
Tucker slowly opened his eyes and found himself in a dark room, the only sound he could hear was that of his heartbeat. He slowly sat up and rubbed the back of his head.
"Not again." Tucker muttered.
The door to the room swung open and a burst of light poured in which burned Tucker's eyes.
"About time you're awake."
"Who are you?" Tucker asked.
A blind shot up from a window allowing the dim light of the sunset to enter. Tucker did not shield his eyes but rather saw Rainbow Dash giving him a harsh glare.
"Why did you knock me out?"
"You being knocked out is the least of your concerns." Rainbow Dash said quietly.
"What do you mean?" Tucker groaned. "This isn't another nightmare is it?"
"For me it is!" Rainbow Dash yelled.
"What are you talking about?"
"I'm talking about what you've been telling everypony in Equestria."
"I haven't talked to anybody, what the hell are you on about?"
"If you haven't talked to anybody then how does everybody know about you living at my place?"
"Well maybe I talked to one chick, but why are you mad that I told her that I've been staying here?"
"Nopony has ever seen you around Cloudsdale or Ponyville before. And since they know we aren't family but you are staying with me for some reason, they assume that we've been sleeping together."
"Well we sort of have been..."
"That's not what they're insisting." Rainbow Dash snapped.
"What are you- oh." Tucker facehooved. "Oh fuck."
"Now thanks to you everypony in Cloudsdale thinks I'm easy since I sleep with somepony nopony knows."
"I know you're mad at me, but can you stop with the somepony and nopony stuff? I'll know what you mean if you just say somebody and nobody."
"Tucker this is serious my reputation is at stake." Rainbow Dash yelled.
"Well what do you want me to do?"
"I don't know."
"Probably should have thought of that before knocking me out. Now if you calm your shit, I'll find a way through this."
"We'll find a way through this." Rainbow Dash corrected.
"So you're not pissed at me anymore?" Tucker asked hopefully.
"No I'm still mad, it's just that if I leave it up to you you'll just make it worse."
"So then what are we going to do?"
"I guess go to Cloudsdale and tell everybody that we aren't sleeping together."
"But we are." Tucker chuckled.
Rainbow Dash hit Tucker in the back of the head again.
"Keep it up and I'll die from a brain hemorrhage."
"I can always dream." Rainbow Dash muttered before flying back to Cloudsdale.
"And here I was beginning to hope that I hadn't found a girl that was batshit crazy." Tucker said under his breath before following Rainbow Dash.
Over at Fluttershy's cottage, Grif and Fluttershy were resting on a tree. Grif felt something touch him and slowly opened his eyes, finding Fluttershy resting her head on his lap, snoring lightly as the wind seemed to dance through her mane. Grif laid his head back on the tree and let out a content smile before closing his eyes.
"Grif, you here?" Church called out.
Grif's eyes snapped open and he rubbed his face as the pain of the beating began coming back to him. Fluttershy slowly got up and stretched before letting out a soundless yawn. Fluttershy looked at Grif whose face was displaying obvious discomfort. She opened her mouth to ask if he needed anything, but Grif looked up at her and gave a quick nod.
"I'll go see what they want." Fluttershy said quickly.
"Okay." Grif muttered.
Fluttershy walked to the front of her cottage and coughed quietly to attract Twilight's attention.
"There you are, we thought you had gone somewhere since you weren't inside." Twilight said with a sweet smile. "Is Grif around?"
"Yes he is resting in the back." Fluttershy replied.
"Oh, did you treat him already?"
"I wanted to but he insisted it could wait until tomorrow."
"He doesn't want anybody else to do anything?" Church asked. "His laziness knows no bounds."
"It's just that after he got bit by the timberwolves I promised not to do anything for a day if he made it through."
"And you would rather see him in pain than break that small promise?" Twilight asked.
Fluttershy frowned and stared at the ground silently for a minute.
"Well I know I for one would rather see him in pain." Church said in an attempt to break the silence.
Fluttershy looked up at Church and narrowed her eyes at him.
"He's just joking." Twilight said quickly.
I am? Church thought to himself.
"I don't know, I think he is happy just to sit around for today, and I really don't want to break my promise." Fluttershy said, clearly torn between her options.
"Well I didn't make any promise. How about I have a look at him, that way you don't have to worry about him and you can keep your promise."
"I would like that." Fluttershy smiled. "Come this way."
Twilight looked at Church and nodded before hastily following Fluttershy.
"I wasn't joking though." Church said dejectedly before following Twilight.
As Twilight rounded the corner she saw Grif cough and give a half wave.
"Are you okay?" Twilight asked.
"You ponies sure do worry a lot." Grif snickered. "I've never been better."
"You certainly don't look that way."
"You know, I think on average I might have actually gotten more sleep before I came here." Grif yawned. "Ironic, don't you think?"
"Don't get that started again." Church said, his tone anything but amused.
"I don't suppose you guys will be leaving anytime soon?"
"Not until I've checked to make sure you're alright." Twilight said as she lifted one of Grif's legs.
"Say, how did you know I was like this?" Grif asked as Twilight examined the markings. "I didn't see Fluttershy leave to tell you guys anything."
"I kind of had a feeling Sarge would kick the shit out of you after you made him lose on purpose." Church said.
"It is obvious, isn't it." Grif chuckled.
"The good news is it isn't anything serious, it is mostly just light bruises. The bad news is that eye is starting to swell." Twilight said as she walked towards the door. "Fluttershy I'll need your help to find something to help with that."
Fluttershy looked back at Grif, awaiting his response. He gave a shrug and laid his head back on the tree.
"I'll stay with Grif and make sure he doesn't hurt himself while you're gone." Church said to Fluttershy.
Fluttershy smiled gratefully and quickly disappeared into her house to get something for his eye.
Fluttershy emerged from her house a few minutes later holding an ice pack in her mouth. She rushed over to Grif's side and placed it lightly over his eye.
"Thanks." Grif said quietly as he held the pack in place on his eye.
"So you just have to keep that on your eye for the next week." Twilight said as she closed the door behind her.
"A whole week?" Grif muttered. "Do you have any duct tape or glue that way I don't have to hold it?"
"All you do is lay down all day so why would you need any of that stuff?" Church asked.
"Hey you're right!" Grif laughed. "God it's good to be me."
"How can you say that when you look like that?"
"It's easy when I have an awesome friend to hang out with, isn't that right Fluttershy?"
Church looked at Fluttershy who had her hair covering her face as she blushed deeply and nodded.
"Don't mind her, she's just being modest." Grif said. "She's really fun to hang out with."
"You think I'm fun to hang out with?" Fluttershy asked happily.
"Yeah. I tried getting Simmons to relax once and I swear he started taking notes when I was explaining it to him. But not you, you just went straight to relaxing and that takes talent."
"I suppose we'll be getting out of your hair for now, if you start to feel a lot of pain do not hesitate to come and see me." Twilight said with a smile.
"Alright, thanks. I guess." Grif nodded as he got up and started to slowly make his way inside. "Come on Fluttershy, I'll let you in on my little trade secret on how to work negative days."
"Okay." Fluttershy said quietly as she followed Grif into the house.
Twilight turned to Church who was watching the sun disappear over the horizon. He let out a deep sigh and started the walk back to the library.
"Are you okay Church?" Twilight asked.
"You're asking a guy who was forced to go crazy if he's okay." Church chuckled dryly. "But yeah I am, why?"
"I don't know you just seem... distant."
"How so?"
"Ever since you saw Tex again you seem to just drift off."
"Do you mind doing me a favor?"
"Sure."
"Stop talking about it." Church said.
"I just want to help." Twilight said softly.
"You can't help that which can't be helped." Church muttered before adding a bleak smile. "Why the sudden interest in the way we think?"
"I just find you fascinating that's all." Twilight said idly.
"You find me fascinating?" Church said.
"Er, that is, I just meant-"
Church let out a small laugh which caught Twilight by surprise.
"What's so funny?" Twilight asked.
"Just seeing you get so tongue tied after I asked you a simple question. I just mean how do you find me fascinating. Is it because I'm from outside the unit?"
"Partially." Twilight admitted with a smile. "Also how you make yourself out to be weak when you can take all of this in stride."
"I have to keep it in stride. If I didn't my mind would be filled with madness." Church sighed deeply. "Well, I guess it already is, but at least it isn't what's controlling me."
"That's one way to look at it I suppose." Twilight nodded. "How about we go grab something to eat? My treat."
"Sure. I never realize I'm hungry until someone brings it up."
"It's because you focus too much on one thing and forget about every other detail."
"That happen to you a lot?" Church asked.
"More than it should." Twilight giggled. "Let's go so we can get back before it gets too dark."
Tucker and Rainbow Dash arrived at Cloudsdale and settled on the clouds before quickly looking around.
"Alright so where are we going to get started?" Tucker asked.
"Well I guess we should find who started the rumors and tell them to stop."
"The other guys should be able to help us."
"How, the only other one of them that can fly is Grif and he seems like the lazy guy."
"No not those guys. I mean Hoops, Score and Dumb-Bell."
"You want to get those rejects to help? They're probably jumping at the chance to ruin me."
"Yeah they didn't sound like they liked you very much." Tucker said with a bleak smile. "What the hell happened between you guys anyways? They seem to be alright guys..."
"They're just... I'll tell you later." Rainbow Dash grunted. After a few seconds she thought through her options and sighed. "Alright, let's go. But you do the talking."
"You want me to do the talking? What was that stuff about me making it worse?"
"If I talk to them I know they'll go out of their way just to annoy me."
"Okay but I still may be a bit fuzzy after you put me in a coma."
"Sorry about that by the way, I didn't mean to hit you that hard."
"Whatever, I'm used to my team knocking me unconscious. Where do you think they are."
"They're probably still in the gym."
"Does that place ever close?"
"Yeah but employees can still go to the gym after hours to stay in shape."
Tucker nodded and they made their way to the weather building which they quickly entered.
"Hey Tucker, you here to work on your muscles?" Hoops said as Tucker entered the gym.
"Not exactly." Tucker said as Rainbow Dash walked through the doors and stood next to him.
"What's she doing here?" Score asked. "Shouldn't you two be, y'know."
"No, that's why we're here." Tucker said.
"Sorry we're not interested in any group-"
"You wish." Rainbow Dash snarled.
"Listen guys I'm going to need a favor."
"Depend what that favor is." Hoops said as he threw a basketball through a hoop.
"Who told you guys that I'm sleeping with Dash?"
"Why do you want to know?"
"Well we're not actually sleeping sleeping together, we're just, well, sleeping together."
"Mind running that by us again?" Score asked.
"We're not fucking, she just has nowhere else for me to sleep. We're trying to find out how this rumor started so we can try and fix this."
"Well, I'm not too keen on helping Crash but... what do you guys think?"
"He's cool." Dumb-Bell nodded.
"It was Cloud Chaser." Hoops said.
"Cool. Do you know where she is now?" Tucker asked.
"Probably at the Mile." Score shrugged.
"What's that?"
"It's Cloudsdale's nightclub." Rainbow Dash said quietly as she walked out the door. "Come on let's go."
"This place has a club?" Tucker asked with a smile as he caught up with Rainbow Dash. "Why didn't you tell me this before?"
"We're not going to be staying there for long. We go in, talk to Cloud Chaser, then get out."
"But-" Rainbow Dash turned to Tucker with narrowed eyes.
"Killjoy." Tucker muttered.
Tucker and Rainbow Dash arrived at a tall building that had a fountain spouting multicolored water and a tall, broad shouldered pegasus standing out front.
"We're here." Rainbow Dash said.
"Really? By the looks of it I could have sworn it was an information kiosk." Tucker said sarcastically.
"Focus." Rainbow Dash said as she trotted up to the building and nodded at the pegasus.
"Dash! Haven't seen you around for awhile." The pegasus said with a smile as he stepped to the side. "Go on in."
"Thanks Bouncer." Rainbow Dash said as she slowly started walking into the club.
Tucker started to walk with her but Bouncer blocked him.
"Name?" Bouncer asked firmly.
"Tucker."
"This is Tucker?" Bouncer asked with a rough laugh. "I kind of expected you to be taller. Oh well since you're with her, go on."
Tucker nodded and made his way into the building and he stood next to Dash. Rainbow Dash turned to him as he gave the building a quick once over. There were hundreds of pegasi scattered around the premises. Some were on a floor of clouds that kept switching colors in tune with the music that was booming throughout the room.
"Well?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"This place is loud." Tucker said. "I like it."
"Don't like it too much or you'll end up besmirching its good name." Rainbow Dash smirked.
"Oh ha-ha." Tucker muttered.
"We should split up." Rainbow Dash said as she looked around the club. "You look around down here I'll look on the second floor."
"Where should I start?"
"Anywhere. Let's just try and finish this quick."
"Bow chi-" Tucker started before Rainbow Dash struck him across the back of the head and started towards the staircase to go to the second floor. "Son of a bitch."
Tucker shrugged off the pain in his head and made his way to the dance floor to start looking around. After a few minutes he decided to make his way to the other side of the room.
"Tucker!" Someone called out, barely audible over the sound of the music.
Tucker whipped around to see Cloud Chaser waving him over from the bar. Tucker smiled and quickly made his way through the thicket of ponies to get to Cloud Chaser.
"Good to see you again, how's it going?" Cloud Chaser asked as Tucker made his way past the group of clubbers.
"Pretty good. Well for me at least."
"What's wrong?"
"You know how I told you I was staying at Dash's place?"
"Yeah, what about it?"
"Well I meant exactly what I said. I'm just staying with her, nothing is happening. Now she's worried about her reputation being ruined because I told you that I was staying with her."
"Sorry, I guess I misinterpreted what you meant." Cloud Chaser said with a look of guilt. "Is there anything I can do to help?"
"Well, maybe start telling the people you told that we aren't doing it and it should be fine."
"So you're not a fan of your new reputation?" Cloud Chaser asked as she took a drink out of her glass.
"Of course I am, but if this doesn't clear up I probably won't have a place to stay soon."
"Okay I'll tell everypony that you two aren't a couple." Cloud Chaser said with a smile. "Hey, how about I buy you a drink?"
"I don't think Rainbow Dash would like that." Tucker laughed.
"I thought you said you guys weren't together."
"To be honest I have no idea what the fuck it is." Tucker admitted. "I guess it's sort of just..."
"Complicated?"
"Pretty much."
"Maybe if you have a little to drink you can think a bit clearer." Cloud Chaser said as she waved the bartender over.
"I already told you that I shouldn't."
"Come on, I feel bad about it. What's one little drink?"
Tucker looked around and found no sign of Rainbow Dash so he turned back to Cloud Chaser and nodded.
"Great. What'll you have?" Cloud Chaser asked as she scooted to the next chair over to give Tucker a place to sit.
"Surprise me."
"Three cliff-divers here." Cloud Chaser said to the bartender who gave a quick nod and started to mix a few drinks.
"Three?" Tucker asked.
"In case Rainbow Dash comes by you'll need something to calm her down." Cloud Chaser giggled.
"Good thinking." Tucker chuckled as the bartender gave him a drink.
"Tucker I know we barely know each other, but how would you like to join the Mile High Club?"
Tucker spat out his drink and dropped the glass on the floor.
"Are you alright?" Cloud Chaser asked concernedly.
"Did you just ask what I think you just asked?"
"I just asked if you wanted to go to the second floor to the bar where the drinks are endless and the music is louder. This is the Mile Low Club where you have to pay for the drinks, whereas the Mile High Club is the VIP area that you can only join if somepony you know invites you."
"Oh." Tucker choked. "Then what are you doing down here then?"
"I like to mingle." Cloud Chaser shrugged.
"Maybe I'll come back later and join up if Dash doesn't kill me by then." Tucker sighed.
"Awesome." Cloud Chaser said with a smile. "How about we get you another drink?"
"Sounds good." Tucker said as the bartender gave them another round of drinks.
"Tucker, what did I say?"
Tucker turned around to see Rainbow Dash giving him another harsh look.
"You told me to go in, talk to Cloud Chaser and then leave." Tucker said before taking a swig of his glass and wiping his mouth. "I'm on step two right now."
"Drinking isn't a classification of talking." Rainbow Dash muttered.
"Come on, loosen up Dash." Tucker said. "I found her and she said she'll try and clear it up. As far as I'm concerned our job is done and we have nothing to worry about."
"Yeah, the night is still young so why not have a little fun?" Cloud Chaser asked, holding up a glass to Dash.
"Okay, but only because I could use a break after flying around all day." Rainbow Dash said with a smile.
"As an apology to the both of you I'll pay the tab." Cloud Chaser said as she waved the bartender back over.
"Only a couple drinks though, then we really should be going." Rainbow Dash said.
"Only a couple drinks." Tucker nodded.
Tucker's eyes snapped open as blood rushing to his head causing him to cry out in pain. After a few seconds he managed to slowly get to his hooves, finding himself in the middle of a field of grass.
"Can I wake up just once and actually find myself somewhere I'm not surprised to be?" Tucker muttered as he wiped his mouth.
Tucker heard a twig snap and he turned to see Fluttershy slowly approaching him with Grif not too far behind.
"Oh thank goodness you're alright." Fluttershy said as she went up to Tucker's side and helped him up.
"I'm not alright, I'm Tucker." Tucker said slowly.
"Maybe he isn't." Grif said.
"That was a joke." Tucker grunted. "What the hell am I doing out here?"
"I was going to ask you the same thing. I came out here to feed my bird friends and saw you here." Fluttershy said quietly.
"Then she woke me up saying that you looked hurt so I came to see someone other than me hurt." Grif yawned.
"Funny guy." Tucker said sarcastically.
"What is the last thing you remember?" Fluttershy asked.
"The last thing I remember was going to a bar and having a couple drinks."
"They have a bar here?" Grif asked happily. "Fluttershy we should totally go there one time!"
"I-I don't like clubs." Fluttershy whispered.
"Why not?"
"I've heard that they're loud and there are a lot of ponies there..."
"You've heard?" Grif repeated unsurely. "Have you never been to one before?"
Fluttershy shook her head slowly.
"That's too bad, they're fun." Grif said.
"Yeah, speaking of fun I think I'm going to be on my way. I need to find out what the hell happened last night so I can find out why I'm here."
"Are you sure you don’t need any rest?" Fluttershy asked, turning her attention back to Tucker.
"I'll get some rest once I get back to Rainbow Dash's place." Tucker said as he shakily flew away.
"You're going the wrong way dude." Grif yelled.
"I knew that." Tucker yelled back as he changed his course and made his way to Rainbow Dash's place.
It took Tucker longer than expected due to him being unable to locate her house. When he finally did, he crashed through the door and fell to the ground and found Cloud Chaser standing next to Rainbow Dash.
"Tucker you're back!" Rainbow Dash said.
"I am? Oh hey, I am! What happened last night?" Tucker asked.
"You don't remember?" Rainbow Dash asked with surprise.
"No, I really don't."
"Well after we had a couple of drinks you got talking about your... skills." Cloud Chaser said slowly.
"Yeah and I guess since we’d had quite a bit to drink, my interest piqued and I guess Cloud Chaser's did too..." Rainbow Dash said, trailing off.
"Wait, what? Did we do anything? Oh please tell me yes." Tucker begged.
"Yes we did."
"Awesome!"
"It's too bad that you missed it."
Tucker paused and caught his breath. He looked at her with an ashen expression and raised his brow.
"What's wrong?" Cloud Chaser asked.
"What do you mean I missed it?"
"Well when we were about half way back you sort of tried to show off some stunt and you ended up flying away from us." Cloud Chaser said quietly. "We thought you would follow us so rather than go back for you we kind of just went back to my place for the night and the rest... well you should be able to put the pieces together."
"I missed it?" Tucker yelled. "Oh god why?"
Cloud Chaser and Rainbow Dash burst out with laughter and fell to the ground laughing.
"Why are you laughing?"
"We didn't do anything." Rainbow Dash said as she wiped a tear out of her eye.
"Jokes on you I didn't believe you in the first place." Tucker smirked.
"I don't know, that yelling seemed pretty genuine." Rainbow Dash noted.
"What really happened then?" Tucker said, ignoring her comment.
"Well me and Cloud Chaser talked while you drank. I think me and her had maybe two drinks while you had about two dozen."
"You should have seen it." Cloud Chaser said. "You just kept hammering them back without stopping."
"Even more surprising was that you were still able to stand after all that and you even managed to start singing." Rainbow Dash said with a brief laugh. "Loudly."
"And off tune." Cloud Chaser added.
"I sang?" Tucker asked. "That doesn't sound like something I would do."
"It sounded like someone dragging their hooves along a chalkboard." Rainbow Dash shuddered.
"Screw you, my voice is awesome."
"Well the ponies in the club didn't think so, you sort of got kicked out for the night. When we went to go get you we found that you had sort of flown away without telling anybody anything." Rainbow Dash said. "I came back here expecting you to be here but you weren't so I went to sleep."
"You weren't worried?" Tucker asked.
"You can handle yourself."
"Yeah but I like it when you handle me."
"His mind never strays far, does it?" Cloud Chaser asked.
Rainbow Dash shook her head, both at Tucker’s question and in response to Cloud Chaser.
"What are you doing here if you didn't stay over for the night?" Tucker asked.
"Rainbow Dash decided that you had been gone all night so she would need somepony to help find you. She wanted to get one of her other friends to help her but I insisted it was mostly my fault for allowing you to drink so much. Since you're here I guess I won't be needed so I'll be on my way. And don't be afraid to look me up when you want to join the Mile High Club. That is assuming you're even allowed back in."
"I think he's going to want to wait a bit before he drinks again." Rainbow Dash said.
"Actually I could go for a drink right now."
Rainbow Dash and Cloud Chaser shared a quick glance.
"Please tell me you're kidding." Rainbow Dash said.
"Yeah, just give me a few days and I'll be ready to go." Tucker groaned as he felt his head ache come back.
"You sure found yourself a keeper there Dash." Cloud Chaser giggled as she left Rainbow Dash's place.
Caboose awoke with a strong sense of pressure on his skull. He quickly rolled off the bed and let out a loud yawn. Pinkie peeked over the bed and smiled at the sight of Gummy attached to Caboose's head by his toothless mouth.
"What is it?" Caboose asked with confusion as he felt an object on his head. "Am I wearing a hat?"
Pinkie reached over and pulled on the item that was clutching Caboose to reveal her scaly friend.
"Gummy, my food is not head." Caboose said happily, hugging the baby alligator.
"You mean your head is not food." Pinkie said as she hopped towards the door.
"It isn't?"
Pinkie giggled until she saw a big circle on her calendar. She trotted back up to it and squealed.
"Is it a spider?" Caboose said, sitting straight back up.
"No it's the mailmare’s birthday today!" Pinkie said as she ran out of the room.
Caboose looked at Gummy and placed him back on his head as he followed Pinkie down the stairs and to the kitchen.
"Where are the blueberries?" Pinkie muttered to herself as she started shuffling through a cupboard.
"I am right here." Caboose said confusedly.
"No silly, I'm making blueberry muffins for the town mailmare. They're her favorite. Aha!" Pinkie said, pulling out a small container that had a picture of a blueberry on it. She quickly set to work on the muffins when the doorbell rang. "Oh, she's early. Can you go get that Boosey?"
"Okay." Caboose smiled as he trotted lazily to the door, opening it to find Twilight standing next to Church who was staring silently at him. "I didn't know you were a mailmare! Why didn't you tell me?"
"I'm not... Caboose?" Church asked dumbfoundedly. "Why is there a small alligator biting on you?"
"Oh this is just Gummy. He is my hat for the day." Caboose said as Gummy wagged his tail. "Would you like to hug him? He likes hugs."
"No thanks." Church said.
"Oh Twilight!" Pinkie said, her head peeking around the kitchen door. "Do you mind giving me a hoof? You too Church."
Twilight and Church turned to each other and shrugged as they walked towards Pinkie. "What do you need Pinkie?" Twilight asked.
"I have somepony coming over so I need your help while I work." Pinkie said as she reached in a cupboard and pulled out a large bag titled “Party Supplies”.
"Sorry I don't do that whole party thing..." Church said as he pushed the bag to the other side of the counter.
"Aw, please?" Pinkie pouted. "It would be really nice if you helped out."
Church rolled his eyes and pulled the bag back towards him and opened it. A flurry of balloons shot out and floated to the ceiling, followed by a shot of confetti. Church slowly looked up and looked at Pinkie bemusedly.
"Alrighty then, I'll just ask you to grab some of those balloons and-"
There was a sudden sporadic knock on the door and Pinkie's ears perked up and her nose crinkled.
"She's here!" Pinkie said. "Caboose, you let her in while we finish preparing."
"Okay!" Caboose said from the other room.
After a few minutes of setting up, Pinkie sent Church and Twilight to go check on Caboose. They soon heard yelling and rushed out to see a gray pegasus yelling at Caboose.
"Muffins!" The pegasus yelled.
"Cupcakes!" Caboose retorted.
"I said muffins!"
Caboose shook in anger and his pupils slowly started to grow in size.
"Both of you be quiet!" Church yelled, causing Caboose's eyes to return to normal. Church turned to the gray pegasus and raised a brow. "Who are you?"
"My name is Derpy." Derpy smiled, but it quickly faltered as she turned her attention back to Caboose. "And muffins are better!"
"What are you two arguing about?" Church asked quickly, trying to deter further arguing.
"She is saying that muffins are better when cupcakes are clearly the betterer ones." Caboose said sadly. "What do you think is better Church?"
"I am not going to answer that." Church said. "Why do you two even care?"
"Because she is wrong."
"No you're wrong." Derpy said as she stuck out her tongue.
"Take that back!" Caboose said.
"Make me!" Derpy said.
"BOTH OF YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Church yelled, causing Derpy and Caboose to shrink down and stare at him. "Jesus, it's like you're both six."
"I'm way older tha-"
"Shut. It. Caboose." Church said as he took a deep breath and let out a sigh.
Pinkie came out of the kitchen with a fresh tray of blueberry muffins that she placed on the table. The delicious smell quickly filled the room and surprisingly calmed Church down.
"What's everypony talking about?" Pinkie asked as she placed a muffin on a plate and gave it to Derpy.
"They're arguing about muffins and cupcakes." Twilight said.
"Ohh, that's a toughie." Pinkie said, scratching her head. "I really like cupcakes, but muffins have such a great taste too."
"Please don't encourage them." Church groaned.
"What about a muffcake?" Pinkie asked quickly.
"That sounds like the greatest thing ever!" Caboose exclaimed as he jumped up and down in excitement. "I want one!"
"We should have thought of that sooner." Derpy said giddily. "Why didn't we think of that?"
"I could name a few reasons." Church chuckled.
"A-are you making fun of me?" Derpy asked sadly.
"Church..." Twilight started.
"What?" Church asked as he saw Derpy's eyes. "Wait, I didn't mean it like that I just meant that if they weren't arguing they could have thought of it. Here's an idea, why don't you just put icing on a muffin?"
"Are you crazy?" Derpy yelled.
"Yeah Church, you can't just do that!" Caboose exclaimed.
"Why do I even bother with you people..." Church muttered.
"Do you know how to make a muffcake Pinkie?" Twilight asked.
"Yes, but we are going to need to get a lot of ingredients for it. They're also really hard to find." Pinkie replied as she tapped her chin.
"That would be the best birthday food ever!" Derpy said.
"I think I got that brain thing." Caboose exclaimed.
"An idea?" Twilight asked.
"No." Caboose shook his head. "Wait. Yes!"
"You have an idea? I really want to hear what your brilliant plan entails." Church scoffed.
"It is time to go on the quest for the greatest thing ever!"
"Well Caboose, I hope you have fun with that." Church said mockingly.
"Aren't you coming with us?" Caboose asked sadly.
"No, I have no interest in helping you do this."
"But-"
"But nothing." Church said as he made his way to the front door. "You coming Twilight?"
"I'm staying." Twilight stated.
"Suit yourself." Church shrugged as he walked through the door.
"I wanted Church to come too." Caboose said sadly.
"He seems like a meanie." Derpy said.
"He isn't a meanie, he is my best friend!" Caboose exclaimed.
"I'll go talk to him." Twilight said sweetly. "Just stay right here and get ready, okay?"
Caboose nodded his head quickly with a wide smile on his face. Twilight trotted out the door and saw Church walking away at a slow pace, seemingly enjoying the scenery. She quickly caught up to him and coughed to get his attention.
"Decided not to go I take it?" Church asked with a smile. "Wise move, you would’ve probably ended up regretting it."
"No I'm still going. I came to try and convince you to go too."
"I don't want to go with him. This whole thing seems like a stupid waste of time. Now that I think about it, I didn't think you were a fan of wasting time."
"Friends are important to me." Twilight said honestly. "And I think I can consider Caboose to be a friend, though we don't interact much."
"You're too trusting." Church said as he continued walking back to the library.
"He's just trying to include you." Twilight said as she watched Church leave.
"I don't like being included."
"I think it would mean a lot to him though. And I think it would mean a lot to Derpy as well seeing as it's her birthday and you made her feel out of place."
"I didn't try to make her feel out of place." Church said guilty. "But even then, I don't even know her... and to be honest I already know Caboose which is stressful enough, but to know not only one but two others that are exactly like him? That is a nightmare."
"He's your friend." Twilight insisted.
"But-"
"But nothing." Twilight smirked playfully. "He seems to look up to you as if you were his older brother."
"Just out of curiosity, why are you even interested in this?"
"Because I'm your friend Church and you have to admit you can be quite the angry pony. Don't get me wrong, I fully understand why. But even then I think the reason you're so angry is because you push away everybody that tries to get you out of your shell."
"Or the reason I'm so angry is because I'm usually surrounded by idiots." Church quipped.
"Come on, it could be fun."
"You're not going to give in easily, are you?" Church grunted.
Twilight shook her head, her smile still spread firmly across her muzzle.
"Fine. But just to have you know the only reason I'm doing this is because I have nothing better to do. And I swear to god if he kills me, I'm going to kill him."
Church and Twilight made their way back to Sugar Cube Corner to find Derpy and Pinkie eating muffins while Caboose was nowhere to be found.
"Should I even ask?" Church groaned.
"Oh, hello again Church, Twilight managed to convince you to come back?" Pinkie asked.
"No, I'm here because she didn't convince me." Church said sarcastically as he looked around the room, expecting Caboose to pop out from somewhere. "Where's Caboose?"
"I think he went back upstairs. Said something about his head hurting."
"That's generally what happens when you have an alligator biting your scalp off."
"There's nothing to worry about Churchey! Gummy doesn't have any teeth so he can't bite anything."
"That doesn't sound good for it. How do you feed it if it doesn't have any teeth? Wouldn't it have to have teeth to bite into meat?" Church asked.
"Gummy is a vegetarian, he would never eat... meat." Pinkie shuddered at the last word.
"Then what does it eat?"
"Ice cream, cakes and other assorted treats."
"Of course, why didn't I think of that?" Church grumbled as he sat on the ground. "Well how are we going to go about this cupcake slash muffin business?"
"Well I've written up the list of ingredients that we'll need." Pinkie said, holding up a piece of paper to Church. "I already have most of the ingredients so it shouldn't take us long to grab the last few."
Church grabbed the paper and quickly read through the ingredients.
"We should get a lot of the ingredients that way we can make a huge amount!" Derpy suggested.
"I like that idea." Pinkie giggled.
"Alright so we just have to go grab this stuff from a convenience store or something?" Church asked as he looked back to Pinkie.
"Oh we're not going to buy this stuff silly. We're going to go places where they grow."
"Sounds easy enough." Church said as he gave the list back to Pinkie.
"Church, you are back!" Caboose suddenly exclaimed from the top of the steps.
"Yeah. There really isn't much to do around here besides stand around and talk, but that gets old quick." Church muttered.
"Yay!" Caboose yelled. "We are going to have so much fun and it is going to be an adventure and it is going to be fun and..." Church slowly turned to face Twilight with a serious look. "...we will eat some food and we will have fun an-"
"Caboose." Twilight said calmly, cutting Caboose off.
"Sorry."
"This is going to be so awesome!" Pinkie said. She suddenly gasped and ran towards the kitchen. "I'll pack snacks!"
"Can we bring the muffins?" Derpy asked as she ran after Pinkie.
"Of course!" Pinkie said from the kitchen. "No Pinkieventure would be complete without them."
"Don't forget about some cupcakes." Caboose said, quickly running into the kitchen.
Church sat down after Caboose had left and slowly began to rub his head. Twilight walked to his side to see what was wrong.
"Twilight, do you mind doing me a favor?" Church asked quietly.
"Sure, what is it?"
"Next time can you just let me walk away?" Church begged. "I'm already getting a headache."
Caboose ran out of the kitchen with two saddlebags that were packed to the rim with food. Derpy slowly came out after him with her own small saddlebag that had an envelope on it. Church noticed this and turned to ask Twilight what it was.
"She delivers the towns mail." Twilight said simply, anticipating Church's question.
"Is she good at it?" Church asked.
"Not particularly." Twilight said slowly. "She was given this as a job to-"
"Prevent damage to properties and people." Church finished, and Twilight nodded once. "That's smart. Why didn't I think of that? Caboose could have done with having something simple to do to keep him from killing anybody."
"Okie dokie, let's see what we got here." Pinkie said as she came out of the kitchen with a contraption on her head that held the list in front of her. "Alrighty the first ingredient is... blueberries!"
"That sounds simple." Church nodded.
"We just have to climb to the top of the mountain that Canterlot is resting on." Pinkie smiled.
"You're kidding... they have to be growing somewhere other than on top of a damn mountain."
"Well of course they do silly. But the best big blue ones grow at higher areamathingis."
"Altitudes." Twilight said.
"That too!"
"Well we should start moving then, we don't want to be that high up when night falls as the temperatures drop to extremely low levels."
"And we're risking our lives for blueberries." Church muttered as he shook his head. "How exhilarating."
"I know! It is going to be so much fun!" Caboose exclaimed.
"Well what are we waiting for?" Derpy said as she flew lazily up in the air. "I can't wait to have fun with my new friends."
"Right." Church sighed as Derpy, Caboose and Pinkie ran out the door. Church turned to Twilight and frowned. "You know how before the wedding I said that I felt something bad was going to happen?"
"Yes." Twilight said hesitantly.
"Well I'm feeling that way again."
"You're just overreacting." Twilight tutted as she walked through the door.
"That's what you said last time." Church said under his breath before following Twilight.
Church and Twilight quickly caught up with the others who were hopping in unison, slowly making their way towards Canterlot.
"I am so happy right now I could just scream." Caboose said, before gasping loudly.
"That can wait until we're done." Church intervened before Caboose annoyed all of Ponyville. "How long do you think it's going to take to get there?"
"Maybe an hour or so, why?"
"I don't know, I just feel safer knowing how long I have left until I die again."
"What do you mean?" Derpy asked, coming to a sudden stop.
Church thought about telling Derpy and Pinkie about him not being natural but put this thought to rest when he brought their intelligence levels into account.
"Church is a ghost!" Caboose said before Church could say anything.
"Really? A ghost?" Derpy asked doubtfully.
"No, that's just Caboose being Caboose." Church said, trying to change the subject.
"Do you know any magic tricks?"
"I'm a ghost, not a magician."
"Aha! So you are a ghost."
How the fuck did I fall for that? Church thought, annoyed that he fell for that so easily.
"Fine, you got me. I'm a spooky ghost."
"You don't look like much of a ghost to me." Pinkie said as she poked Church in the ribs. "Nope, definitely not a ghost."
"Fine, you want proof?" Church said, interpreting this as a challenge. "I'll give you proof."
"Awesome!" Pinkie squealed.
Church closed his eyes and let his body fall to the ground as an image of him stayed in the same spot where he was previously standing. Derpy yelled in surprise and jumped behind Pinkie, who stood still with a calm smile.
"Satisfied?" Church asked.
"I'm still not convinced."
"Caboose, do you want to help me show her?"
"Yes!" Caboose said happily.
"Great." Church said. Church made his way to Caboose and vanished into thin air.
Pinkie and Derpy stared curiously at Caboose who had his eyes closed. Caboose let out a small cough and opened his eyes, which were now several shades brighter than they usually were.
"How about now?" Church asked through Caboose's mouth.
"Smoke and mirrors." Pinkie waved.
"Seriously? My dead body and taking over Caboose isn't proof enough?"
"Nope."
"Ooh-ooh do it to me!" Derpy said.
"Alright." Church said as he reappeared in front of Caboose.
"Yes!" Caboose said happily, now looking around in a daze. "Aw, is it over already?"
Church phased into Derpy's body and stood proudly in front of Pinkie. One thing that Pinkie instantly noticed was that the mailmare’s eyes had levelled out and had changed to a pale blue. Satisfied with the performance, Pinkie nodded. Church let out a sigh of relief before going back into his own body.
"..to me!" Derpy said slowly as her entire body shivered.
"What did it feel like?" Pinkie asked.
"It felt cool!" Derpy laughed. "It was like I could see with my eyeballs, but I couldn't speak with my mouth."
"And you feel cold!" Caboose added.
"Can we do that again?"
"Let's just get this over with." Church said, rolling his eyes as he started towards Canterlot.
"Aw. Maybe later then?"
"All I set out to do was show you I'm a ghost and that's what I did, so I wouldn't count on it."
"Okay." Derpy said sadly.
They quickly resumed their journey towards the mountain, Pinkie in the lead with Caboose and Derpy following close behind.
"So why did you do that?" Twilight asked quietly.
"Do what?"
"Tell them that you're a ghost."
"You really think Pinkie and the other one would be able to understand?" Church stated. Not to mention that I sort of got tricked into it.
"I see your point." Twilight said as she saw Pinkie humming a happy tune. "Are you having fun yet?"
"No. Are you?"
"I guess so." Twilight shrugged. "I just wish you would too. You need fun more than anything."
"What I need is a break from the others." Church chuckled.
"We're almost at the foot of the mountain!" Pinkie called out.
"The mountain has a foot?" Caboose asked.
"See? That's what I've had to put up with for all these years." Church said quietly.
"You're making it out to be worse than it really was, and I think you know that." Twilight said.
"Listen, your little psychology thing might work on the others, but you're going to have a hell of a time trying to make sense of what's in my head."
"I take that as a challenge." Twilight smirked.
"Fine, but when you start to go crazy be sure to tell me, then we'll have a lot more in common."
"It's really cold up here." Church said through his clamoring teeth as they approached a plateau near the top of the mountain.
"What are you talking about Church, my head is really warm!" Caboose said, Gummy chomping on his head again.
"Hang on." Twilight said. A wave of warmth passed through the group and Church gave Twilight an appreciative nod.
"So is there anything up here that's going to be surprising us?"
"No the bears are usually really nice." Pinkie said passively.
"Oh okay." Church dismissed. His eyes shot wide open and he snapped his head to face Pinkie. "Wait bears? What the fuck are we doing up here if there's damn bears?"
"No need for that potty mouth mister!" Pinkie said as she continued looking for a bush of blueberries."The bears won't hurt us, they're really kind and gentle."
"A gentle bear?" Caboose pondered. "That sounds fun! Do they like cuddles? I would like to give them cuddles."
"I'm sure they wouldn't mind." Pinkie giggled as they reached a large landing. "As long as we don't show any signs of wanting to hurt them then they should leave us alone. Aha! Found some."
Pinkie quickly ran up to a small snow covered bush and shook the snowflakes off to reveal a bunch of blueberries. Pinkie quickly tore the plant out of the ground and threw it in her saddlebag.
"Just a few more of these and we should be good."
"Just out of curiosity, what do these bears eat?" Church asked.
"Blueberries of course."
"Great. We're taking their food, I'm sure they'll be so happy to see us doing this."
"Don't worry Church, the bears only come out at night to scavenge for their food." Twilight said.
"Besides, there is more than enough to go around." Pinkie pointed out.
"Is this one?" Caboose asked as he poked a small plant.
"Hang on a sec." Pinkie said as she took another bush of blueberries out of the ground. She quickly ran up to Caboose and shook the snow off. "Yeppers, those are blueberries."
"Yay!" Caboose began to yell. "I'm being usefu-"
"Caboose please be quiet." Twilight said calmly.
"Yeah, I don't want to be caught in the middle of an avalanche." Church hissed.
"Come on guys, we just need another five or so, then we can go on to the next ingredient." Pinkie said as she continued her way up the mountain.
"Hey, me and Twilight will split up so we can cover more ground."
"Great idea Church!"
Church turned and walked for a few minutes with Twilight not too far behind.
"Glad to see you're getting into the spirit of it." Twilight said warmly.
"I'm not, I would just rather have a dignified death than one where I die from their sheer idiocy."
"Church can you please at least try to have some fun?"
"I thought I have been here long enough for you to know me more than that." Church chuckled.
"Well at least you know how to laugh. There's life in you yet!" Twilight giggled.
"You're a regular comedian." Church said with a smile. "I think I see some of those blueberries."
Twilight turned her head and saw nearly a dozen bushes.
"At least there is a lot of them so we can finally get off this damned mountain."
"Let's go get the others." Twilight said, already making her way back to the group.
"But I was beginning to like this alone time."
Twilight and Church quickly found the group and made their way back to the blueberries. Pinkie quickly made her way over to them and knocked the snow off.
"Nice job Church!" Pinkie said as she tore one of them out of the ground. "Now we can take some extra blueberries just in case."
"What's next on the list?" Twilight asked as she used her magic to pluck a few plants from the ground.
"Next up is cocoa beans." Pinkie said as she attempted to shut her bag. However, Pinkie had trouble due to packing in so many blueberries, so Caboose went up to the bag and pushed down on the blueberries, allowing the bag to shut. Church glanced at the bag which looked like it was ready to explode.
"I can't wait to make these, I hope they turn out to be perfe-"
"Shh. Did anybody here that?" Church said quietly.
Everypony turned to see some snow fall to reveal the entrance to a cave where pure white bear poked it's head out and began to sniff nervously.
"Hello Mr.Bear!" Caboose greeted happily.
"Caboose stay back." Church said.
"You're such a worrywart." Pinkie laughed.
Caboose started to trot up to the bear and suddenly tripped in front of it, making some of the muffins to spill out. The bear walked out of the cave and started to make his way over to the muffins with a look of hunger in his eyes.
"Those are our muffins!" Derpy yelled.
Caboose threw Gummy back on his head. He then ran to the muffins and threw them into his bag which made the bear give a deafening roar.
"Run!" Twilight yelled.
The group quickly turned tail and started to sprint down the mountain, the bear quickly gaining. After just a couple seconds, Church began to hear the bear grunting as it ran at them. Church was ahead of the others when he came to a small landing.
"Wait!" Church yelled, causing the others to come to a halt.
"Church what are you doing?" Twilight asked nervously as the bear stared curiously at Church as he reached into Caboose's saddlebag.
"These things eat blueberries, right?" Church asked as he pulled a couple muffins out of the bag. "Well I'm going to give them to him.
"Wait!" Pinkie called out.
"Pinkie they're just muffins, and we'll be making more anyways so don't try and stop me." Church muttered as he walked up to the bear, holding the muffins up to it.
Pinkie gasped as the bear bent over and smelled the muffins.
"See? What are you so worried about?"
"Those aren't blueberry muffins, those are raspberry muffins!"
"And?"
"Bears hate raspberry muffins, don't you know that?" Derpy asked.
Church whipped his head back to the bear and it began to growl. The bear hit the muffin out of his hoof and bared its teeth.
"I don't think you guys fully appreciate just how much I fucking hate this place."
The bear slowly edged towards Church, poised to attack.
"Church, don't move." Twilight said nervously.
"I wasn't planning on it." Church said quietly, mouth barely moving.
"What are we going to do?" Derpy asked.
"I have an idea!" Caboose said as he started to hop playfully towards the bear.
"Caboose what are you doing?" Twilight asked.
"Hello Mr.Bear!" Caboose said happily, causing the bear to turn its attention to him. "I think all you need is a hug!"
The bear snarled and jumped at Caboose, mouth open and ready to kill. Church grabbed Caboose shoved him out of the way with his magic. The bear angrily turned its attention back to Church who was staring at it nervously. The bear swiped at Church, catching him in the face and knocking him to the ground.
"Son of a bitch! Maybe I should have let him have Caboose so we could have just run...” He muttered to himself before glancing at the rest of the group. “Any help would be appreciated you know."
"Just run!" Twilight yelled, already doing so herself.
"I like that plan." Church said as he jumped to his hooves.
The group then turned tail and started to run down the mountain, the bear following right behind.
"He is going to catch up with us." Derpy said as she flew down the mountain. "Why don't you do that possessy thingy?
"Because I don't plan on dying anytime soon."
"Why would a ghost be afraid of dying?" Pinkie asked.
"Because dying fucking hurts!" Church yelled.
"Well we wouldn't know anything about that." Twilight said. She looked to the right and smiled. "I think I have an idea."
"Great, let's hear it."
Twilight's horn started to glow and she shot a bolt of magic up the mountain.
"What was the point of-" Church started but was cut off due to the sound of snow thundering down the mountain. "I don't think I like that idea very much."
"Just trust me." Twilight yelled back.
"Finding it pretty hard to do anything other than run at the moment."
"Jump to the right when I tell you."
"Why?"
"Jump!" twilight yelled.
The group jumped to the right and went under the one of the landings to allow the snow to pass over head. Twilight used her magic and surrounded them all with a shield to block any snow from surrounding them.
"That was so much fun!" Derpy said as she shook snow off of her head.
"I'm sure you'd be saying different if you were the one who got hit in the fu-"
"Where's Caboose?" Pinkie asked.
Church and Twilight looked around and saw no sign of him. Church slowly got up and looked out of the shield and watched expectantly as the snow continued pushing down the mountain. Suddenly the bear shot by in the snow with something on it's back.
"Wee!" Caboose yelled as he kept hold of a tuft of the bear’s fur while Gummy was still firmly clamped onto his head.
"Damn he survived." Church grunted.
Twilight grabbed Caboose with her magic and brought him into the bubble.
"Aw, I was having fun." Caboose pouted.
"What the hell were you thinking Caboose?" Church yelled.
"I just thought that the bear could use a hug."
"Of course you did. So what's the plan now?"
"We wait until the avalanche stops and then we can get off the mountain." Twilight said.
"Wait, isn't Canterlot on this mountain?” Church exclaimed as the realization hit him. “Won't it get hit by the avalanche too?"
"The walls are reinforced to stop that sort of thing from happening. They wouldn't have built it on a mountain if they didn't have any plans on stopping natural disasters."
A silence fell over the group as they watched the snow overhead continue to barrel down the mountain.
"I'm hungry." Derpy said as her stomach growled.
"Me too." Pinkie said. "Caboose can you give me a cupcake?"
"Okay." Caboose said as he opened his bag. "Would you like one too Church?"
"Sure." Church said, grabbing a cupcake out of the bag.
"You know, I really like the snow." Derpy said as she chomped on a muffin.
"Uh-huh." Church murmured as he took a small bite out of his cupcake.
"Are you okay Church?" Pinkie asked.
Church said nothing but just shrugged.
"Do you not like snow or something?" Derpy asked.
"Listen, can we just put leave it alone?" Church snapped.
"S-sorry." Derpy said quietly, confused as to what she had done to anger Church.
"Church, I know it's hard but you have to get over it." Twilight said comfortingly.
"Twilight, just don't." Church said flatly.
"If you don't learn to accept it then you can never be happy."
"Accept what?" Derpy asked.
"Hey look!" Caboose said happily.
The group looked through the bubble to see that the snow had now stopped for the most part, and the bear was now running back up the mountain to get to its cave.
"That bear has the right idea." Church sighed.
Twilight stopped focusing on the shield, causing it to blink out of existence.
"Time to get the cocoa beans." Pinkie said, still in a good mood.
"You guys are on your own." Church muttered as he trudged through the snow. "I'm going back to the library and staying as far as I can away from you all."
"But I was really liking hanging out with my friends on my birthday." Derpy said sadly.
"Listen, I wouldn't really consider you one of my f-" Church started but stopped when he turned to see Derpy looking at the ground and pushing snow around. Feeling guilty, he groaned and looked at Derpy. "Dammit. Fine, I'll come, but I swear if I almost die again I'm leaving."
"Yay!" Derpy and Caboose said in unison.
"So let me guess, these cocoa beans are found in a volcano?"
"No silly, they're in Froggy Bottom Bog." Pinkie said.
"Anything in there that I should know about beforehand?"
"There are a lot of frogs there but that's pretty much it."
"That's all?" Church asked nervously.
"Yup."
"Are you sure?"
"Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye." Pinkie said as she made a wild gesture that ended with her poking her eye.
"I don't know what that was but whatever, let's just get the hell off of this mountain." Church said. "I fucking hate snow."
"Church! Do you remember the bear?" Caboose asked excitedly as they slowly walked down the mountain.
''Yes Caboose, I remember the bear." Church groaned as he rubbed the side of his head.
"Do you remember how I wanted to hug it?"
"Yes Caboose..."
"And then I walked up to it but then you used your thingy and I went woosh!"
"I know that looked like fun!" Derpy laughed. "Ooh Church, can you throw me in to the air?"
"You want me... to throw you?" Church asked.
"Yeah it looks like fun!"
"You're kidding, right?"
"Nope!"
Church looked over to Twilight who nodded hesitantly.
"I could end up hurting you..."
"Geez, you really are a worrywart."
"Fine, you asked for it." Church muttered.
Derpy got surrounded by a shimmering blue mist and suddenly propelled upwards. At the height of the launch, Derpy opened her wings and started to slowly glide throughout the sky.
"I wish I could fly." Caboose said sadly.
"I can help with that!" Derpy said, swooping down and grabbing Caboose.
"This is amazing!" Caboose yelled as Derpy flew him through the air.
"I want to do that too!" Pinkie yelled.
"Hang on." Derpy said as she swooped down, allowing Caboose to grab Pinkie.
"Wee!" The trio cheered as they slowly drifted through the sky.
"She's pretty strong." Church noted.
"I'm holding them steady with my magic. I don't want to see them get hurt." Twilight said.
"Right." Church sighed.
"Are you sure you don't want to talk?"
"Do you keep asking because you're concerned and you want to help, or just because you want to see how I tick?"
"Well I would be lying if I didn't say I was interested in both."
"I think I'm good for now." Church sighed as he watched the three of them slowly approach the ground. "It's just good to know that somebody is concerned with my well being."
"That was so amazing! Church did you see me?" Caboose asked as Derpy dropped Caboose and Pinkie on the ground.
"Yeah, I did."
"Are you still sad about the bear thing?" Derpy asked.
"No I'm not sad about the bear thing..."
"Aw Church I know what'll cheer you up." Derpy said happily.
"Why is it that every time one of you says that, something bad always happens to-" Church began but looked down to see that he was no longer on the ground. He looked up to see Derpy lifting him into the air. "What are you doing? Let me go!"
"But if I let go you will fall. Besides I think you will like the air, it's all like big and stuff!"
"Just make it quick." Church murmured.
"Okay."
Derpy slowly glided through the air, allowing Church to see a beautiful view of Ponyville and the surrounding area. Suddenly Church started hurtling downwards and he looked up to see Derpy still gliding around with ease, though she was no longer holding on to him.
"This is going to suck." Church groaned as he saw the ground quickly approaching.
"Whoopsy." Derpy giggled. She caught up to him before pulling up from the fall to land firmly on the ground. "Didja like it?"
"The view was pretty good, so aside from the fall, sure."
"Well we're near the bottom and Froggy Bottom Bog isn't too far from here." Pinkie said.
The group stopped talking as they continued towards the bog at a slow pace. Once they approached the entrance to the bog, Pinkie sat under a tree and took off her saddlebags.
"Time for a break?" Twilight asked.
"Yup!"
"Great." Church said as he rubbed his head. "I think I might have a concussion."
"Oh, I know something that's good for those." Pinkie said as she reached in her mane.
"Why am I suddenly worried."
"Because you're always worried silly." Pinkie giggled as she took a glass out of her mane and held it out to Church.
"Now you're getting to know me." Church chuckled as he looked into the glass. "What is it?"
"It's just some medicine."
"That you kept in your hair..."
"Don't worry, my mane is just fine." Pinkie said as she played with her mane. "See? I didn't get any of it in there."
"Oh that's good news." Church said sarcastically as he continued looking at the concoction. "Where did you get it?"
"Zecora made it for me! I have lots of potions and stuff so I'm ready for almost everything. Now drink up, we don't want you to start feeling bad."
"Something tells me if I drink this I will start feeling bad." Church said quietly to Twilight.
Church shrugged and chugged the entirety of the glass and shivered violently.
"This tastes horrible!" Church sputtered as he rubbed his tongue in an attempt to rid it of the taste.
"Here eat this!" Caboose said, handing Church a cupcake.
Church snagged the cupcake and started to chew violently until the taste of the medicine had all but disappeared.
"Hey... where’s Gummy?" Pinkie asked.
"I let him on the ground because he wanted to go for a swim." Caboose said.
"Oh, okay. As long as we didn't forget him up there." Pinkie said as she jumped to her feet. "Well, that's enough of a break, let's go!"
"That was barely a minute." Church complained.
"Let's go, they're not going to wait up for us." Twilight said as she helped Church to his hooves.
Church nodded and the pair quickly caught up with the others who were looking at the trees, trying to find some cocoa beans.
"I still can't believe we're doing this for a muffin." Church said as he watched Derpy fly into the leaves of a tree.
"Muffcake." Pinkie corrected.
"Sorry. I meant I still can't believe we're doing this for a muffcake."
"At least there are no bears here." Twilight said.
"I know I miss him too, but now I have my frog friends to keep me company." Caboose said, a dozen frogs sitting on his head.
"They're probably poisonous." Church said, amused and worried at the same time.
"None of the frogs in here are poisonous, so there is no reason to worry."
"Maybe you're right. Maybe I am worrying over nothing."
A sudden, loud roar echoed through the bog with the sound of trees snapping coming from nearby.
"I thought you said there were only frogs in here." Church said shakily.
"Oh, didn't I mention the hydras?" Pinkie asked as she tapped her chin. "I could have sworn I said something about them."
"What is a hydra?" Caboose asked as the frogs on his head jumped into the murky water next to him.
A tree flew by the group and slammed into a large boulder, shattering the tree to pieces. They all turned around to see a hydra glaring at them with its five heads.
"That's a hydra." Twilight said nervously.
"I wonder if he'll be my friend."
"Oh, oh, I remember him!" Caboose said.
"What the hell are you talking about." Church asked nervously as he slowly backed up.
"Yeah remember when Grif got bit by the doggy and then we had to go to that tree and we saw him."
Church looked at the hydra, whose heads seemed to be focusing solely on him.
"Run or fight?" Twilight asked shakily.
"Both." Church yelled as he turned tail and started to sprint away.
The hydra growled and quickly began to follow the group. Church's hoof got caught under a root and he slammed his chin on the ground, dazing him. Derpy quickly turned and saw one of the heads go for Church. She promptly dive-bombed the hydra, colliding with its snout, causing it to reel back in pain.
"Leave my friends alone!" Derpy yelled as she flew down to Church and brought him to his hooves.
"Run!" Twilight yelled again, which snapped Church out of his daze as he took off, quickly catching up with the others.
A loud splash came from behind them and they turned to see the hydra sinking into the bog.
"Finally something goes right for us." Church muttered. "Keep running, I don't want to be here when it gets out."
Caboose grabbed onto a large tree branch as he ran by it and pulled it forwards, and once he released it it flew backwards and hit Church in the face, knocking him to the ground.
"Dammit Caboose." Church grunted as he quickly got off the ground.
"Should we keep running?" Twilight asked as she caught her breath.
"Why would we do that when we're right where we need to be?" Pinkie laughed as she pointed towards a large tree filled with cocoa beans.
"Really?" Church yelled. "You're still thinking about the damn muffcake?"
"Well, yeah, what else would I be thinking about?"
"How about the over-sized reptile chasing us?"
"Don't worry about him, he got stuck, remember? We have all the time in Equestria to grab these then we can be on our merry way."
"Just hurry it up, okay?" Church sighed as he leaned against a tree.
"Church! Church! Did you see me?"
"The only thing I saw was you hitting me in the face with a tree..."
"It wasn't my fault." Caboose said quietly as he kicked a pebble guiltily. "Someone put that branch in my way."
"Of course they did." Church sighed. "Well let's see, so far I’ve been hit by a bear, avoided being wept away in an avalanche, almost fell to my death, tripped face-first into the mud and gotten smacked in the face by a tree branch and the hydra is probably not too far behind us. This day has been just fantastic so far."
"I know right? It's so exciting!" Derpy laughed as she did a small loop in the air just to crash into the cocoa bean tree.
"Are you okay?" Church asked.
"Yeah, I'm okay." Derpy said happily, snapping to an upright position. "I meant to do that."
"Where have I heard that before?" Church asked quietly, looking over at Caboose. "So how are we going to get the beans? Are you just going to fly up there and grab them?"
"Jeez, you really don't know anything about anything, do you?"
"Evidently not." Church groaned impatiently. "Please teach me the ways of the oh-so majestic cocoa bean tree."
"The beans on these trees are nearly impossible to pull off of the stem, so the tree has to be hit with a lot of force o the beans can fall." Twilight explained as she knocked lightly on the tree. "And since nopony here is particularly strong we have to find the sweet spot on the tree.
"Actually, Caboose is pretty strong, get him to hit it."
"Okay, Caboose can you hit this spot right here?" Twilight asked as she put her hoof on a part of the tree.
"Okay!" Caboose yelled, running full speed into it with his head, making a few dozen beans fall off.
"Alright, just a few more times and we shoul-"
The hydra roared as it burst through the trees, fury present in each one of its heads as it charged at them.
"Hang on, I think i have an idea." Church grunted.
"What are you going to do?" Derpy asked.
Church slammed his eyes shut and let his body hit fall to the ground as he sprinted towards the hydra in his ghost form. The hydra, confused at how it's prey duplicated, lunged at the ghost Church. The hydra's head phased through the apparition and slammed into the ground, knocking the head unconscious.
"One down, four to go." Church muttered as he came to a stop behind the hulking creature.
"It's working!" Caboose yelled.
Another one of the hydra's heads hissed as it lunged towards Caboose, who simply hopped playfully into the air and landed on the head.
"Are we playing tag? I love tag!" Caboose laughed as he trotted up the hydra's neck and tapped it on it's shoulder. "You're it!"
One of the heads shot towards Caboose with its jaw low, ready to eat him. Caboose rolled down the neck at the last second, causing it to bite onto the adjacent head's neck and get its teeth stuck. The bitten one snarled and bit the other in its throat in frustration. Soon the two heads were snapping at each other, tearing large chunks out of them.
"Just two more I guess." Church muttered.
One of the free heads hurtled towards Pinkie who simply ducked, making it slam its face into the tree, causing a cascade of cocoa beans.
"Thank you mister." Pinkie said as she gave the dazed hydra a kiss on the cheek before collecting the beans.
The last hydra head shot towards Twilight, whose attention was turned to Pinkie as she gathered the beans.
"Look out!" Church yelled as he sprinted towards the hydra.
"Wha-" Twilight started as she turned to see the hydra's head barely a foot away from her, staring at her with feasting eyes.
"No you don't." Church grunted as he jumped into the hydra's head.
The hydra started to shake violently as Church took over its mind, having complete control within a second.
"Church?" Twilight asked.
"Yeah?" The hydra asked as it opened its eyes and looked around. "Look how fucking tall I am! I can't believe it worked."
"Now that's the kind of thing I would expect a ghost to do!" Pinkie laughed.
The dazed hydra quickly shook its remaining head and looked around until its eyes rested on Church's corpse.
"Oh fuck. It didn't work." Church groaned.
Before any of them could do anything, it lunged down and wrapped its tongue around Church's body. It then whipped its head backwards and swallowed, Church's corpse visibly traveling down its throat.
"Well fuck."
The hydra licked its lips and gave a satisfied burp as it looked at the two heads that were still fighting.
"Motherfucker!" Church snarled as he headbutted the hydra. "You ate me you son of a bitch!"
"Wouldn't it be you ate yourself?" Caboose asked.
"Shut the fuck up Caboose." Church yelled as he bit into its neck.
"How are you going to get your body back?" Twilight yelled through the hydra's cry of pain.
"I have no idea."
"What if he poops you out?" Caboose asked.
"Oh god we have to hurry, I don't want that to happen." Church yelled as he headbutted the hydra again.
"This is getting out of hoof." Twilight said as her horn began to glow. "As much as I don't want to do this, I think we may have to kill it."
"Don't do anything! I don't want my body to be smashed to pieces."
"Then what do you propose?"
The hydra head bit onto Church's throat and he gasped in pain.
"I think I know what I have to do."
Church phased out of the hydra, confusing the head he was in as it was under attack. The hydra quickly regained its senses and began to fight back, and soon all four heads were fighting.
"You guys may want to get behind something." Church suggested quietly.
"What are you going to do?"
"Something that I am going to regret instantly." Church sighed before jumping towards the hydra's stomach.
The hydra's torso began to shine blue, which made the four heads stop fighting, preoccupied with the spectacle. The stomach quickly began to shake violently and the hydra gave a deafening shriek.
"Get down!" Twilight yelled, causing the group to jump behind the remnants of the tree that the hydra had shattered.
Moments later an explosion blew away their cover. Twilight looked up to see Church standing in a pool of bile, while pieces of the hydra rained down from the sky.
"Church are you alright?" Twilight asked.
"Why wouldn't I be? Though... I was right." Church said as he started to wipe the muck off of his body.
"About what?"
"I already regret doing it. This stuff smells like shit."
The other three looked up to see Church was now fine and the hydra was nowhere to be seen.
"Where did it go?" Derpy asked as she looked around cautiously. "Did it leave?"
Church looked around at the huge chunks of hydra that were scattered everywhere and still falling from the sky.
"I'm done." Church grunted as he began to walk away. "If you need me, don't hesitate to not ask me."
"But we're almost done." Pinkie said as she hopped alongside him, before bringing one of the pieces up to her face. "This stuff is weird. What is it?"
"What's left of the hydra." Church said without stopping.
"Ew, that's gross." Pinkie said as she dropped the piece to the ground before turning back to Church. "But why don't you stay?"
"Because I'm covered in the innards of a giant hulking, multi-headed creature."
"But we just need the-"
"I. Don't. Care." Church said slowly. "Twilight, you can follow them if you want but I have had enough of dying a while."
"Do you want us to get you when we bake it?" Pinkie asked.
"Do what you want." Church said before disappearing through the trees.
"Alright Pinkie, what's next?" Twilight asked.
"We just have to grab a few leaves of vanilla. I think that there are some areas around the bog that have leaves, so it shouldn't take so long."
The four wandered for an hour until they came across a small, clear watered stream that passed through the bog.
"There's some!" Pinkie said as she hopped towards a small bush on the edge of the stream. "There's a lot of it too!"
Pinkie picked dozens of vanilla stems and placed them in her bag before snapping it shut.
"That was fast." Pinkie giggled. "Now we can go back and start to make it."
A loud thump came from behind them, startling the group. They turned to see a large lion, glaring at each of them.
"What is a lion doing in a swamp?" Caboose asked. "They belong in the ocean!"
"It’s a manticore." Twilight said as Pinkie and Derpy started backing away.
"What is a mandiplore?"
"It's a creature with the body of a lion, the tail of a scorpion and a pair of wings. They're extremely dangerous and-"
The manticore let out a loud roar, cutting Twilight mid sentence.
"Run!" Derpy yelled as she bolted past the manticore.
The manticore lost focus on the others and prepared to chase after Derpy until the others also ran by it. With all of its prey running in one direction, it quickly gave chase to the four ponies. Twilight turned a few seconds later to see it sprinting towards them, knocking everything out of its path without any signs of slowing.
"We have to split up! Pinkie you take Derpy and run the other way while I take Caboose with me."
Pinkie gave a nervous nod before tapping Derpy and splitting off from Twilight and Caboose. The manticore looked between the two groups and gave chase to Twilight and Caboose, who seemed to be having a harder time as they ran.
"Can't you use your magic power thingy?"
"I need time to focus on it, I can't just turn around and use it."
The manticore quickly caught up, whipping Twilight with its tail and sending her barreling into a tree before slumping to the ground.
"Run Caboose!" Twilight yelled weakly.
Caboose lost all focus of everything and stared blankly as he noticed the manticore's scorpion tail flicking back and forth as it was getting ready to strike.
"Caboose, don't worry about me, just go!" Twilight yelled as her horn started to glow.
"It is a kitten... with spikes?" Caboose asked darkly as the manticore licked its lips.
"Caboose?" Twilight asked quietly, oblivious to the manticore as she watched Caboose's fur turn a deep shade of blue while his eyes turned completely black.
Caboose snarled as he lunged towards the manticore and tackled it to the ground. Twilight watched fearfully as Caboose slammed his hoof into the manticore's face.
"I hate spikey kittens."
"Caboose, what are you doing?" Twilight asked, unable to comprehend what was happening as the manticore shook Caboose off.
"I'm having fun!" Caboose chuckled as he kneed the manticore in the throat.
The manticore swung its tail at Caboose, but he simply grabbed onto it. The manticore started to flail its tail wildly in an attempt to get Caboose off, but Caboose held strong. Annoyed, the manticore slammed its tail, along with Caboose, onto the ground, causing his grip to falter.
"When I am done with you I shall feast on your remains!" Caboose said as he rolled to his feet without batting an eye.
The manticore growled as Caboose casually watched it with a smile. The manticore let out another roar before jumping towards Caboose. Rather than jump out of the way, Caboose allowed the manticore to grab him with its claws. The manticore quickly clutched Caboose to his chest and began to fly.
"What just happened?" Twilight said quietly as she heard Caboose laugh as the manticore flew him further into the bog. “I’m not sure if I need to be more worried about Caboose or the manticore”
The manticore twisted and turned through the trees, occasionally hitting him against a tree, but when it did, Caboose simply whooped and cheered. After a few minutes of swerving through the trees, the manticore took to the skies to intimidate him.
"A lovely view, isn't it?" Caboose asked nonchalantly.
The manticore glared at Caboose and began to deviate its flight path, trying to make him sick. After a few seconds Caboose bit onto its paw, making the manticore yank its paw upwards which allowed Caboose to land on its back. Without hesitating, Caboose grabbed the manticore's tail and twisted it sharply. The manticore screeched in pain as his tail broke and flipped over, flying upside down.
"What's wrong, got a monkey on your back?" Caboose cackled harshly as he clutched onto a tuft of fur on the small of its back.
The manticore snarled and dove towards the ground with the intent to land on its back to crush Caboose. Caboose waited until the manticore was nearing the ground before kicking off of its back and landing on his feet. The manticore quickly landed on its paws and looked around for Caboose.
"Keep his attention on you and I'll try to think of a spell I can use to calm it!" Twilight yelled as she began searching her thoughts.
"Take all the time you need." Caboose said as the pair began circling towards each other.
The manticore decided that it would let Caboose make the first move this time, so it began to limp to give a sense of weakness. Caboose took the manticore’s bait and charged towards it. Once Caboose was too far to turn around the manticore brought back its paw and quickly swiped at Caboose. Caboose jumped in the air and used the paw to leap even further and double his speed. Caboose slammed his skull into the manticores skull, causing it to yelp and back into a tree.
"Okay, that's enough Caboose." Twilight said quietly. "I have the spell in mind, so I just need to-"
The manticore instinctively flicked its broken tail to the side and connected with Twilight's jaw, making her cry out as she stumbled to the ground.
"This is why I hate spiky kittens." Caboose smirked as he began to walk towards the manticore, which was still dazed and confused. "Time to put the kitty to sleep."
"There you guys are!" Derpy said as she hopped out of the bush with Pinkie.
"We were beginning to think-" Pinkie started, but stopped when she saw Caboose next to the manticore. "Caboose, watch out the manticore is right there!"
Caboose shook his head and smiled lazily as he looked around. The manticore slowly began to stand up behind him.
"Where am I?" Caboose asked dizzily.
"Get out of here you big meanie!" Pinkie snapped as she leaped between Caboose and the manticore. "If you so much as touch a hair on Boosey, Celestia as my witness I will make you unhappy."
The manticore began to whimper and quickly scurried off with a limp as its tail dragged behind it. Pinkie stood proudly as Derpy and Caboose approached her.
"That was amazing!" Caboose said. "I wish I could have made it run away."
Twilight stared quietly as Derpy and Caboose kept giving Pinkie compliments, trying to make sense of what just happened.
"Oh you guys are too kind." Pinkie giggled. She leaned to the side and made eye contact with Twilight, who had a clear look of confusion on her face. "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine Pinkie." Twilight said quietly. She got to her hooves and slowly walked up to the others. "Caboose? Do you remember anything?"
"I remember that my name is Caboose and I am blue!" Caboose yelled.
"No I mean before Pinkie found us."
"Hang on. Yes. Wait- no. No I don't." Caboose said thoughtfully. "Wait, yes! I remember running... from something. Was there a mountain involved?"
"Never mind." Twilight dismissed with a smile. "I'm just glad you weren't harmed."
"Nothing is going to hurt Caboose when I'm around." Pinkie said as she hugged Caboose.
A pair of purple eyes came out of the bog water next to them.
"There you are Gummy!" Pinkie said with a sigh of relief. "I was starting to get worried."
Caboose trudged through the water and placed Gummy on his head, allowing him to clamp onto his skull.
"Let's see." Pinkie said as she opened her bag. "Blueberries, check. Cocoa beans, check. Vanilla, check. That's everything we need so we can go home now."
"It's getting pretty late." Twilight said quietly as she looked up at the sky.
"Yeah." Derpy yawned. "Do you think we can make the muffcake tomorrow? I'm really sleepy."
"Oki doki loki." Pinkie smiled as she closed her bag and began to walk towards Ponyville. "Today was fun, wouldn't you say?"
"It was... interesting to say the least." Twilight said, eyeing Caboose fearfully.
"Yeah, it's too bad Church left." Caboose said sadly. "I think he would have liked to see Pinkie tell off that..."
"What's wrong?" Derpy asked.
"There is something about that cat thing that I am trying to remember..." Caboose said as he tapped it's chin.
Twilight opened her mouth to stop his train of thought.
"Oh it had wings!" Pinkie said.
"Oh yeah, it did!"
"Let's get out of here and get some rest." Twilight said with a sigh of relief.
"So just stop by Sugar Cube Corner tomorrow afternoon and we'll get it ready, okay?" Pinkie stated as the group left the bog.
"Okay!" Derpy replied with a smile while shaking her head slowly. "I had a lot of fun today. And it was nice to meet you Caboose, you're really nice and I always like to meet new ponies."
"I am? Hey, I am!" Caboose said. "And I like meeting new ponies too!"
"Bye!" Derpy said as she flew away, zigzagging in the air.
"I should be getting back." Twilight said quietly as she started to trot off.
"What's the hurry smarty pants?" Pinkie asked as she hopped next to her. "Don't you want to walk home with your friends?"
Twilight glanced uneasily at Caboose and hurried her pace, but yelped and slowed her pace when she felt a sharp pain shoot through her side.
"Did that mean manticore do something to you?" Pinkie asked firmly.
"Yeah, it hit me with it's tail." Twilight said weakly.
"That meanie." Pinkie scowled. She shook her head and her features softened as she tapped on Twilight's back. "Do you think we should get a doctor for you?"
"No, I'm fine." Twilight said with a tight lipped smile. "I just need some rest, that's all."
"Alrighty, hurry back home and get some sleep." Pinkie said, parting ways with Twilight. "Let's go Caboose, we need to make sure everything is ready for tomorrow."
"What is tomorrow?" Caboose asked.
"The day after today." Pinkie giggled.
"Oh my gosh, you're right! You are a genie!"
"Do you mean genius?"
"That too!"
"See you tomorrow Twi!" Pinkie yelled before letting out a yawn. "Gee, I'm more tired than I thought."
"Good night Pinkie." Twilight yelled back, smiling.
"Good night Twilight!" Caboose yelled.
"Good night Caboose." Twilight said edgily before starting to trot back home, ignoring the pain in her side.
"What is wrong with her? Is it something she ate?" Caboose asked.
"No, she's acting like she just saw a ghost." Pinkie said. She giggled and started to hop back home. "Oh wait, she did! Church is a ghost!"
Twilight quickly walked up to the door of the library, intent on finding out what happened to Caboose in the bog and how he changed so suddenly and drastically. When she opened the door, Church was sitting at the table before snapping upright.
"Hey Twilight. I'm sorry for storming off like that, I was just stressed out." Church said as he rubbed his neck. He watched Twilight for a few seconds, sensing that she was more deep in thought than usual. "You okay?"
"Yes I am, thank you." Twilight said absently as she walked into her kitchen. "I'm going to make some tea, would you like some?"
"I'm good."
Twilight quickly made a cup of tea and used her magic to take a few books off of the shelves. She sipped the tea as she sat next to the table and opened one of the books.
"What are you reading?"
"Psychology books."
"You're really going to try to make sense of me?" Church chuckled. "Have fun with that."
"Now isn't the time Church." Twilight said harshly. She sighed and rubbed her side where the manticore hit her. "Sorry, I didn't mean to yell, it's just..."
Twilight fell into a silence as her eyes narrowed on the index and began to flip through the book and stopped on a page and began to read it.
"Something on your mind?" Church said as he shifted uncomfortably.
"After you left and we found the last ingredient, we were attacked by a manticore." Twilight said as she flipped the page. She glanced up to see Church giving her a confused look. "A manticore is a creature that has the body of a lion, the wings of a bat and the tail of a scorpion."
"Doesn't sound like it can compare to a fucking dragon with multiple heads..."
"Hydras are not dragons, they're apart of the reptile family."
"Aren't dragons reptiles?" Twilight looked up to Church and laughed weakly before starting to read the book again. "What? How the hell am I supposed to know the difference?" Church muttered. "So why did it attack you? Just for fun or what?"
"No, we were just in its territory. If it wanted to eat us it would have, but then- ah here we go." Twilight said as she began to write on a piece of paper.
Church leaned over and began to read the page she was on. There was no title on the page, but his eyes rested halfway through the page and he let out a small laugh.
"What is it?" Twilight asked.
"You think I have multiple personality disorder?"
"What? No I don't, why would you think that?"
"Well for one, you're reading a medical book and that page is talking about it. Secondly, you look like you're trying to hide something."
"Have you been reading a book on psychology?"
"Maybe." Church shrugged. "Well if you aren't reading up on it for me, then why are you doing it?"
"I..." Twilight trailed off as she recalled the way Caboose changed. "It's hard for me to say. Has Caboose ever acted strange around you?"
"Twilight, are you trying to tell me that Caboose isn't always strange?"
"That's not what I meant. It's just that-"
"Hey you're back!" Spike said as he ran down the stairs. "Church came back about an hour ago without you and told me what happened to him. Did he really get eaten by a hydra?"
"Yes he did." Twilight said.
"So he really did... y'know." Spike said as he scratched his head. "I mean, did you really have to do that to it?"
"Why are you acting like I'm the bad guy here?" Church muttered.
"The girls always solve their problems through talking and stuff..."
"Oh, you still haven't caught on that I'm not a girl yet?" Church replied. "I guess I'll have to try harder."
"I guess you will." Spike laughed as he yawned and rubbed his belly. "Well, I'm going to catch some shut eye."
"I'll be up soon too." Twilight said as she closed the book, just to open another one.
"Alright. Night Twi. Night Church."
"G'night." Church nodded. Once he heard the door shut, Church turned to Twilight and coughed. "So do you need any help with what you're doing, or can I go to sleep too?"
"No, it's okay. I'd say you deserve a good sleep."
"You don't have to tell me twice." Church laughed as he went up the stairs to climb into bed.
"Twilight, you should really go to bed soon." Spike yawned as he opened the door to the patio where Twilight was sitting. "It's getting late."
"Yes Spike, I'm just thinking about what happened back in that bog." Twilight muttered.
"You mean when Church got almost eaten by the hydra?"
"No. After that we were attacked by a manticore, so to confuse it Pinkie went with Derpy one way and I took Caboose a different way. It decided to follow us, but something changed in Caboose once he saw its tail..."
"Changed?" Spike asked as he scratched his head. "What do you mean he changed?"
"His features darkened and his voice became extremely deep."
"That's what you're worried about?" Spike chuckled lightly. "So his looks changed, that isn't something to get worked up about."
"No, that was just the start. After he changed he started to attack the manticore. Every time he got hit, he just shrugged it off, laughed, and went back in for more. After a few hits the manticore grabbed him and flew up into the air with him, while he just laughed the entire time. And that laugh..." Twilight shivered viciously. "There was something evil in that laugh of his. I'm going to have to ask Pinkie to keep her eye on him."
"Do you think he got possessed?" Spike asked nervously.
"Don't be silly Spike. There has to be a logical explanation for it..." Suddenly the sky lit up as it was streaked with the white lines of hundreds of stars.
"That was tonight?" Twilight asked as she ran inside her room. "Spike, where did you put my telescope?"
"I didn't touch it." Spike grunted as he went back inside.
Twilight quickly re-emerged with a telescope and placed it on the banister. She looked through it and began to watch the flurry of stars, which now filled the sky.
"I completely forgot about tonight with all that has been going on..." Twilight said regretfully.
One of the stars then fell out of the sky and crashed into the ground.
"Oh dear." Twilight gasped as a pillar of dust shot upwards. "I hope nopony was in the vicinity of that..."
A lone unicorn was sitting on a bridge over the stream, watching the stars that lit up the sky.
"It's beautiful..." The pony gawked at the beautiful display. "I feel like I can just touch the stars..."
One star caught her eye, as it did not shoot across the sky, but rather slowly started to expand. The ponies eyes shot open when she realized that the star was shooting right towards her. She jumped to her feet and jumped off the bridge and into the stream. After a few seconds she crawled up the bank and shook most of the water off. She looked up to see a cloud of dust surrounding the landing area.
"My goodness..." The pony said quietly as the dust began to fall down.
Once the dust had settled, she approached the edge of the crater and looked into it to catch a glimpse of the star. But what was inside was not a star, but was a seven foot long figure. The pony blinked, confused by what she saw, believing it to be a statue until it groaned, causing the pony to yelp and fall on her flank. She blinked and went back up to the crater. The figure slowly started to get to on it's hind legs and began to shake.
"H-hello?" The pony asked.
The figure slowly looked up and wiped the dirt off of its body, revealing a light blue, metallic skin. The figure then jumped up to the edge of the crater, landing a few feet away from the unicorn.
"What happened?" The figure asked quietly.
"Y-you fell from the sky and landed h-here." The unicorn said as she motioned towards the large crater.
"Oh." The figure coughed.
The figure looked down at her leg, which appeared to be fine, but it knew that it had been broken on impact.
"Are you alright?" The unicorn asked quietly.
"I just fell from the sky and broke my leg, do you think I'm alright?"
"S-sorry." The unicorn said quietly. "Are you an alien?"
"I guess you could say that." The figure said, extending her hand up to the unicorn. "My name is Carolina. What's yours?"
"I'm Aqua Dew." The unicorn said with a shaky smile, as she shook Carolina's hand. "Do you think you'll be okay?"
"I've had worse." Carolina shrugged as she took off her helmet, allowing her crimson red hair to fall to her shoulders. "Are you from around here?"
"Yes, why?"
"I'm looking for someone, maybe you can help me."
"I would love to. Who are you looking for?"
"I'm looking for someone, who is wearing stuff just like me."
"Sorry, but I haven't seen anypony that looks like you. But maybe I've heard of him, what's his name?"
"He has a lot of names. Alpha, Epsilon, Church..."
"Sorry, none of those ring any bells."
Carolina darted towards Aqua Dew, grabbed her by the horn and, with a flick of the wrist, snapped it off. Aqua Dew let out a yelp and started to scream. Carolina's free hand darted to the pony’s mouth, stifling the screams. Soon the pain became too much for Aqua Dew to bear and she fell to the ground, unconscious.
"That's a shame." Carolina said quietly. Carolina sat on the ground and started to feel her leg. She felt a sharp pain as she touched her ankle. "Dammit."
Carolina looked at the horn in her hand and began to slowly examine it.
"How am I going to find him when my foot is broken..." Carolina groaned.
Suddenly, the horn began to glow bright blue and a beam shot towards her ankle. Carolina instinctively threw the horn away from her. She stared at it silently for a few seconds before getting to her feet once again. Her eyes snapped to her ankle in surprise when no pain accompanied the action. She slowly walked up to the horn and picked it up.
"What the hell is this thing?" Carolina asked herself.
She slowly turned and faced towards the town and pointed the horn at the bridge. She focused on it and a ball shot out of the tip of the horn and blew up the bridge. Carolina held herself back and smiled at the horn before putting her helmet back on.
"I'm coming for you Alpha." Carolina said as she tightened her grip on the horn. "And I'm going to kill anything that gets in my way."
Twilight woke bleary-eyed the next morning, pain still running through her side. As she sat up, she looked down to see Spike sleeping on his bed, snoring lightly. She smiled before looking down at her ribs to examine the large bruise from where the manticore had struck her. She sighed and got off her bed and made her way downstairs to prepare breakfast. Twilight reveled in the quiet that enshrined the kitchen as she ate which was broken by footsteps on the stairs.
"Hey." Church muttered as he slowly made his way down the stairs.
"Good morning Church." Twilight said sweetly. She sniffed the air and turned to Church with a comical look. "You smell sort of funny."
"Probably something I ate." Church chuckled.
"Speaking of, do you want me to make you something to eat?"
"Nah, I'm good. I need to wash what's left of this stuff off." Church said as he opened the door to the bathroom.
"That sounds like a good plan." Twilight giggled.
Church came out of the bathroom several minutes later, with a smile spread across his face.
"What are you thinking about?"
"A lot of things." Church said as he sat down at the table next to her. "So you were up late last night, huh?"
"Yes, how did you know?"
"My room is right next to yours, you woke me up when you kept running around your room."
"Oh." Twilight said quietly. "Sorry, I didn't know."
"I don't get much sleep anyways." Church shrugged. "So what are the plans for today?"
"Well a star hit nearby and I thought I would go and examine it."
"Sounds... fun."
"It should be, do you want to come?"
Before Church could respond a small knock came from the front door and the pair fell silent.
"Who is it?" Twilight asked.
"It's me." Fluttershy said quietly, barely audible past the door.
Twilight opened the door to see Fluttershy, eyes filled with tears, staring up at her.
"Fluttershy... what's wrong? Are you okay?" Twilight asked quickly.
"Twilight, it's horrible." Fluttershy said, hugging Twilight tightly.
"Fluttershy calm down. What happened?"
"Somepony got attacked a-at the edge of town."
"What do you mean attacked?" Twilight asked softly. "Tell me everything you know."
Fluttershy took some deep breaths to calm down before starting. "Aqua Dew was sitting on the bridge when the stars lit up the sky, when suddenly a star fell next to her."
"The star?" Twilight mumbled before snapping back to attention. "What happened next?"
"That's what the doctors can't find out. She just kept screaming about a tall monster that attacked her, and nothing else. I hope she'll be alright."
"How did she get attacked?"
"Her horn got torn off." Fluttershy said before wiping her eyes. "I talked to the pony that found her and I found out that the bridge nearby had been destroyed as well."
"What happened to it?" Twilight cooed, trying to squeeze out each and every last detail of the hysterical mare.
"It was blown up. That's how the pony found her, she heard an explosion and went to find what caused it."
"Where's Grif?"
"H-he went to go get the others and he told me to come here and tell you what happened."
"Let's wait for the others, then we'll try to figure this out, okay?"
Fluttershy nodded before releasing Twilight to go wait next to the door.
In a small house on the edge of Ponyville, a stallion was sleeping when he was awoken by a knock on the door.
"Who is it?" The stallion called out weakly.
A few seconds of silence lingered before the knock repeated, this time harder and more rapid.
"Hold on a second." The stallion grunted as he rolled off the bed and started to make his way to his door. As he reached out to open it, the door exploded in his face. The stallion recoiled and covered his face with a foreleg, deflecting the wooden remains that flew at him. He slowly lowered his hoof to see a light blue beast standing in his door, holding a bloody unicorn horn.
"W-who are you?" The stallion asked as he backed up against the wall. "What are you?"
"What I am depends on what your next move is." Carolina said as she took out her pistol and pulled the slide back.
The stallion’s eyes went to the pistol with the understanding that she brought it out for a reason and, judging by her attitude, he did not want to find out what it did.
"Well?".
"What do you w-want me to do?" The stallion asked.
"Answer some questions." Carolina said as she placed the pistol back in the holster
"Fair enough." The stallion said, motioning to a seat. "Why don't you have a seat, m-make it easier on the both of us."
"I prefer to stand." Carolina said quickly. "Now, do you know anybody named Alpha?"
"Can't say that I do."
"How about Epsilon?"
The stallion shook his head quickly.
"Church?" Carolina asked, this time with a darker tone.
"No..."
Carolina grunted and looked out the window of the house.
"Have you seen anybody that isn't a damned horse around here?"
"N-no, all the ponies I know are, well, ponies. And I know pretty much everypony in town."
"Has there been anything odd that happened in town recently?"
"Besides a... whatever you are... demolishing my door, not really..."
"That's too bad." Carolina sighed.
"Why's that?" The stallion asked quietly.
Carolina grabbed the stallion by the throat and lifted him off the ground.
"What are you doing?" The stallion choked through the assailant’s iron grip.
"If you aren't going to be any of any help to me then I have no use for you. I'll ask you one more question, and you better damn well have an answer, has anybody new come into town recently?"
Suddenly memories filled the stallion’s mind. Memories that went back a few weeks to a certain pony. A certain pony that kicked him in the ribs, embarrassing him in front of everypony in town.
"Well?" Carolina snapped.
"I remember meeting a stallion in town a few weeks ago, and I could tell he wasn't from around here." The stallion choked. "He is kind of old, red fur, sort of has weird accent."
"His name." Carolina commanded, loosening her grip on his neck. "What is his name?"
"I think it was Sarge." The stallion wheezed as he struggled to get his breath back.
"Great." Carolina said, dropping the stallion to the ground. "Take me to him."
Sarge, Applejack, Big Mac and the Cutie Mark Crusaders had gathered on an empty field next to the farm. Big Mac had brought a plow with him, while Applejack and Sarge only brought their hooves and their hats.
"Nice hat Sarge!" Scootaloo whooped.
"Er, thanks. So what are we doing out here exactly?" Sarge whispered to the Cutie Mark Crusaders, who were jumping around each other excitedly.
"Well, we were trying to think of other ways to find our Cutie Marks, and then we thought that since Applebloom lives here we could become Cutie Mark tree planters." Sweetie Belle explained.
"And why do you need all of us here to help?"
"Big Mac'll till the soil, Applejack'll tell us where t' plant and you're goin' t' help us plant." Applebloom said as she spat out a bag of seeds.
The group heard the sound of hooves hitting dirt and they all turned their heads to see Grif running their way.
"There you are." Grif panted. "Why are you all the way out here?"
"I promised the girls I'd help them look for their marks and they decided to plant trees."
"That sounds... fun?" Grif said slowly. "Anyways, Fluttershy sort of had a mental breakdown and I don't know why, so we need your help."
"I would have a mental breakdown too if I was forced to live with you."
"You were forced to live with me."
"Why did you have to remind me?" Sarge sighed deeply. "I finally managed to repress those memories."
"That's a good idea... maybe I should try doing that." Grif shook his head. "Anyways I think you guys should come with me and see her."
"What happened exactly?" Applejack inquired.
"I'm a bit fuzzy on the details. Fluttershy was crying and I couldn't understand a word she said so I told her to go talk to Twilight." Grif said as he rubbed his neck. "All I know is that she wanted to be with all the other because she didn't want to be alone or something."
"Are you going to be there?" Sarge grunted.
"Well, yeah."
"Then count me out."
"Well it's a good thing she didn't ask you to go." Grif said, turning to face Applejack. "You going to come?"
"Ah hate t' say it, but Fluttershy is always worryin' 'bout somethin' or another." Applejack said quietly. "Ah'm sure she doesn't need all of us there t' help her."
"Can't say I didn't try." Grif said, before laughing. "Wow. Never thought I would hear myself say that. We'll all be at the library if you need us."
"Don't hold your breath." Sarge grunted.
Over the next hour the girls managed to plant nearly fifty trees. Then something off in the distance caught Sarge's attention. He squinted his eyes until the figure was clear.
"Big Mac." Sarge said quietly. "Take the girls back home. Make it fast."
"Why?" Big Mac asked simply.
Sarge motioned his head to the left. Big Mac looked over to see a tall, alien figure approaching.
"Come on girls." Big Mac said nervously, nudging the girls back with his hooves. "We need to get going."
"Huh, why?" Scootaloo asked.
"But we're plantin' trees." Applebloom mustered.
"Listen to your brother." Sarge said.
The girls looked to Sarge, and then at each other before shrugging and following Big Mac.
"What's wrong Sarge?" Applejack asked.
"That." Sarge said, eyes locked on Carolina.
Applejack turned to see a figure slowly approaching them. "What is tha- oh. Is that one of yer friends?" Applejack asked with a smile.
"Judging by what she's holding in her hand I would have to say no." Sarge said as he began walking towards Carolina. "Go warn the others. Tell them that Carolina is here."
"What are ya goin' t' do t' her?"
"I'm going to do what I can to slow her down."
"Are ya implyin' what ah think yer implyin'?" Applejack asked defensively.
Carolina stopped roughly fifty feet away and leaned against a tree, watching Sarge silently.
"D'ya think ya can beat her?"
"Probably not, but I'll be damned if I let a blue see me walk away."
"Well ah'm stayin'."
"I'm not asking your opinion, private." Sarge snapped. "I was giving an order."
Applejack flinched and took a few steps back, surprise by Sarge's outburst.
"Listen to me. I am a fighter. I was born to fight. I was raised to fight. That was the whole reason I joined the army in the first place. When I fought with them though, I fought because I was told to fight, because it was fun." Sarge said as he looked back to Carolina who was now leaning her shoulder on a tree. "But now I have something that is actually worth fighting for. Family. And I'm sure as hell not ready to let that blue over there ruin that."
Applejack's eyes began to tear up, but Sarge gave a supportive smile and nodded.
"And if you make it fast, maybe you can stop her before she hurts anybody else. One more thing." Sarge grunted, taking off his hat. "Take this. I don't want it to get dirty."
Applejack nodded and grabbed the hat before starting to gallop full speed towards the library. Sarge let out a sigh as Carolina started to walk towards him again.
"Why the hell are you a horse?" Carolina snapped.
"That's classified information." Sarge tutted.
"Very funny. Where is Church?"
"I try to keep my affairs as far from the blues as I can."
"Is that so?" Carolina asked.
"Yeah."
"Then I hope you're good at close combat." Carolina said, unsheathing her knife and putting the horn in its place.
"I was about to say the same thing." Sarge said as he cracked his neck.
Carolina suddenly swung the knife at it at him, but Sarge juked to the side, simultaneously spinning around, readying his back legs. Then he let loose, hitting her in the side and sent her flying into a tree.
"Lucky hit." Carolina hissed.
"I'll bet."
Carolina swung her knife at Sarge, this time nicking his belly, causing a trickle of blood to emerge. Sarge scowled before jumping at Carolina, but she side stepped and grabbed him by his tail and mane. Carolina lifted Sarge upwards and threw him against a tree. While she had hold of him, he reached for the pistol, but the swinging caused him to grab something else from her side instead. Carolina punched Sarge in the jaw then grabbed him, withdrew her pistol and shoved it under his jaw.
"What happened to close combat?" Sarge asked calmly.
"I decided to mix it up a little." Carolina chortled. "Now either you're going to help me find Church, or this grass gets a whole lot more red."
"Now that you mention it, the grass would look better that color." Sarge laughed, making Carolina punch him in the ribs again. "If I was afraid to die, do you really think I would have stayed here?"
"You're crazy." Carolina muttered, lifting Sarge up by his throat. "Any last words?"
"Just a few."
"Make it quick then."
Sarge headbutted her, but all it did was make her turn her head and laugh. Sarge began to laugh as well, when there was a small clinking noise. Carolina looked back to Sarge who had a large smile on his face.
"Why are you smiling?"
"Heh. Just thought about how I came here ready to die and you didn't." Sarge chuckled morbidly.
"What are you talking abou-" Carolina started, but stopped when she saw Sarge hold up an unpinned grenade between their faces.
"You just got Sa-"
The grenade exploded, interrupting Sarge and engulfing them in a flurry of flames and shrapnel.
Applejack ran as fast as her legs could carry her, her heart beating a mile a minute. She hopped over each and every obstacle on her way to the library, not sparing a second to catch her breath.
"Sarge needs help!" Applejack yelled as she bucked the door open, everypony’s heads snapping to the panting earth pony as she burst into the room.
"What do you mean Sarge needs help?" Twilight asked, sensing the tension in her voice.
Applejack looked up with confusion, eyes filled with tears. "Ah don't know fer sure, all ah know is that he thinks he is gunna die." Applejack said weakly, placing his hat on a chair.
"Tell us what happened." Twilight said, both trying to calm the hysterical mare and try to find out what had happened.
"We were in th' field next t' the farm and saw this tall figure, much like what Church n' th' others looked like when they came here." Applejack said, which caused the others to look at each other in confusion. "She also had a horn that had blood on it. He told me t' tell ya that-"
"Carolina is here." Church finished hurriedly. "We need to get to the farm. Now. Twilight, if you would."
"Right." Twilight nodded, closing her eyes.
The room flashed purple and the group found themselves in front of the farm house.
"This way!" Applejack said as she ran through the apple trees.
The group followed Applejack until they came to an opening, where they could see Carolina place the gun on his throat. Applejack stepped forward, but Church grabbed onto her shoulder.
"If you go in there she'll kill him for sure." Church muttered.
"Are ya willin' t' risk that?"
"She may be a killer, but she isn't stupid. She's here for me so she will need him alive to find me." Church rubbed his neck. "We're going to need a plan."
"Why don't we go out there and just get it over with?" Tucker asked quietly. "I mean, she doesn't know we're here."
"She's a freelancer, remember? As soon as we're out in the open she'll-"
"What is that thing?" Rainbow Dash interrupted.
"What thing?" Twilight asked as Sarge raised his hoof.
"Get down!" Church grunted, as he and the other guys jumped to the ground.
"Why wo-"
The explosion ripped through the clearing, disorienting the girls causing them to fall to the ground in multi-coloured heaps. Applejack was the first to look up, to see the battered form of Sarge feebly attempting to get up. His assailant on the other hand looked to be relatively fine, already dashing across the distance between them, grabbing Sarge and holding a knife to his neck. Before she could flick her wrist to plunge the knife into his neck, Carolina was sent flying by an unseen force. She looked up to see Applejack standing in between her and Sarge.
"If ya touch him again ah won't hesitate t' harm you." Applejack snarled, bent over and ready to jump again. “More.”
"How adorable, Sarge has a horse for a girlfriend." Carolina said, quickly getting to her feet. "I think I'll let him watch this."
"We're family." Applejack snapped.
"What a stupid, useless sentiment."
Applejack jumped forward, but Carolina took out the horn and used it to suspend Applejack in the air. Applejack tried bucking her, but was too far away for her kicks to connect.
"Didn't expect that, did you?" Carolina said, smirking.
Carolina flicked her hand to the left, throwing Applejack at the others. Twilight used her magic to slow Applejack and place her lightly back on the ground. Twilight charged a magic bolt and shot it at Carolina, but she deflected it back with a flash from the severed horn. Twilight quickly created a shield that reflected the bolt skywards.
"You can't hide the Alpha forever." Carolina yelled.
"I'm not hiding you crazy bitch." Church declared.
"Why the hell are you a horse?" Carolina questioned as she walked towards the group.
"Y'know, I keep wondering the same damn thing."
"I'll try to hold the shield so she can't get in, but that mass transportation spell took a lot out of me." Twilight grunted as her horn continued to glow brightly. "I don't know how much longer I can last."
"I can wait all day." Carolina said, tapping her foot impatiently.
"We have to come up with something." Grif said quietly.
"She'll hear anything we say you idiot." Simmons sighed.
"So we're dead then?"
"Yeah."
"Bummer."
"Who will I kill first?" Carolina said quietly, looking over all the ponies in the shield. Her eyes rested an Grif and she pointed the horn at him. "I think I'll start with you."
"No you don't, that honor is mine and mine alone." Sarge grunted, jumping onto Carolina's back. "Quickly, get Caboose mad!"
"Get him mad?" Twilight echoed. Her eyes grew wide when she understood how Caboose had changed.
Carolina grabbed onto Sarge from over her shoulders and slammed him into the ground.
"Caboose, can you do that thing you did back at the bog?" Twilight said quietly.
"What thingy?" Caboose asked.
"Think about the manticore."
"What are you doing?" Church groaned. "It's bad enough we're going to die, but I don't think Caboose being angry is going to help us."
Carolina grabbed Sarge by his throat and threw him through the shield. he slammed into Applejack, causing them both to fall over. Applejack rolled to her feet and ran to Sarge's side. Applejack looked Sarge over and saw multiple wounds that were bleeding lightly.
"Don't worry about me." Sarge coughed. He turned his head to Caboose and sighed. "Caboose, get over here."
"Okay." Caboose said quickly.
"Listen to me. You have to get angry."
"Why would I do that?"
Twilight grabbed Caboose and looked into his eyes.
"Hello!" Caboose smiled.
"If you don't do anything now she is going to hurt Pinkie Pie." Twilight said softly.
"Damn right I will." Carolina said as she stabbed Twilight's shield with the severed horn, using its magic to shatter the shield.
Caboose looked over to Pinkie, who was smiling at him. Caboose blinked and looked at the ground, when he felt something bubbling up. He started to hyperventilate and shiver violently before letting out a blood curdling yell, kicking at the ground as his fur got darker and his pupils dilated.
"Caboose are you okay?" Church asked nervously.
Caboose slammed his hoof into Church, knocking him to the ground.
"What's with the idiot?" Carolina asked.
Carolina closed her eyes for a brief moment and felt immense force hit her in the chest, shooting her flying backwards. Once she had come to a stop, she looked up to see Caboose glaring at her.
"I will ravage your body and feast on your soul if you so much as lay a finger on my pie."
Caboose shot towards Carolina and tackled her to the ground and began to hit her repeatedly in the chest. The group stared, slack jawed at their once innocent friend.
"Caboose... is a bad ass?” Tucker said quietly. “Well, my whole life is a lie."
"What happened to him?" Grif asked nervously.
"O'Malley happened to him." Sarge chuckled as he watched Caboose slam Carolina's head into the ground.
"Wait, O'Malley?" Church muttered. "What are you talking about? The EMP got rid of him."
"Well he left something behind in Caboose. He taught him how to get angry."
Carolina took out her pistol and tried to bring it up, but Caboose slammed his hoof on her wrist, making her release it. Carolina headbutted Caboose in the muzzle, causing him to growl and jump off of her.
"Should we do something?" Simmons asked.
"If you want to get in between what's basically O'Malley and a freelancer, then go ahead." Church muttered.
"I think I'm good." Simmons quickly replied.
Carolina took out her knife and swung it at Caboose. He jumped out of the way, but the knife still managed to connect with his muzzle.
"I think when I'm done with you I'll go straight for the pink one."
Caboose snarled and grabbed Carolina by the helmet and slammed her head onto a large rock that jutted out of the ground. The visor of her helmet shattered, effectively blinding her as shards flew into her face. Caboose yanked off the helmet and hit her in the nose, breaking it. He then stood on his hind legs, spun around and threw her a few feet away.
"Caboose?" Pinkie asked nervously, fearing the new Caboose.
Caboose turned to Pinkie and his eyes reverted back to normal and he began to smile. Carolina noticed this, promptly hopping to her feet.
"Hello!" Caboose yelled happily.
Carolina jumped in the air, her foot ending up in Caboose’s chest sending him tumbling into the others.
"That wasn't nice." Caboose said dizzily.
Carolina aimed the horn at Caboose and shot a concentrated bolt of magic at him. Church used his magic and grabbed the bolt out of the air and threw it back at Carolina. She stood still and watched the bolt missed her by an inch, and then began to laugh.
"This is between us, not them." Church yelled.
"You made it about them when you came in here." Carolina growled. "And now they're going to pay for it with you."
"I'm tired of listening to her, let's fuck this bitch up!" Tucker yelled, flying towards Carolina.
She side stepped out of the way and brought her elbow down and drove it down with immense strength right into the small of his back as he flew by.
"Dammit." Tucker complained as he tried to reach his back. "Why the hell is she so fast?"
Carolina walked towards Tucker, who was on the ground writhing in pain. Just as she was kneeling down, about to break Tucker's neck, she got knocked to the ground.
"You can't kill a blue!" Sarge yelled, kicking her in the throat. "That's my job!"
"Good to see you still have some fight in you. I was beginning to think that the grenade was the end for you." Carolina glared up with a savage smile plastered on her face.
"I'm the best damn fighter you'll ever meet." Sarge said, hitting her in the chest. "And that's sir to you."
Carolina leaped to her feet and lunged at Sarge but he bucked her in the chest, causing her to fall back down.
"Oh yeah! Feel it bitch!" Tucker yelled, still on the ground.
Carolina looked up and growled at Sarge, who was standing over her with a smile.
"Look's like it's not just these blues that I'm used to fighting that suck at it." Sarge said smugly.
Within a second, Carolina stabbed Sarge in the ankle with the horn, going all the way through. Sarge yelled in pain and fell to the ground. She got up and kicked him in the head, causing his vision to blur.
"That's two down." Carolina said with a wicked smile. "Batter up."
"Grif, execute plan delta!" Simmons yelled.
Grif nodded and ran straight at Carolina, who then kicked him in the face, propelling him back to where he started.
"What the fuck was that? That wasn't plan delta!"
"Like I fucking know what plan delta even is!" Grif yelled, holding his nose.
"Just surround her!"
"You could have just said that!" Grif snapped, flying behind Carolina.
“Oh, and Grif, good job at least trying to get yourself killed.” Sarge commended.
Simmons used his magic to give himself a sudden burst of energy, but as Carolina sidestepped the bolt, Grif tackled her to the ground.
"I got her!" Grif yelled.
Carolina knocked Grif off and instantly grabbed his head and slammed it on her knee as she brought it up.
"Goddammit." Grif choked, falling to the ground. "I didn't get her."
Tucker got up and flew towards Sarge and helped him up.
"I have a plan." Tucker said.
"Let's hear it." Sarge mumbled, staring at his ankle.
"It doesn't matter to me what happens to these idiots." Carolina turned to Church. "But if you come back now I might let them live."
"I'm not going anywhere with you."
"Fair enough." Carolina said, charging at Church with the horn gripped tightly in her hand, aiming to kill.
"Church watch out!" Caboose yelled, jumping in front of Carolina.
"Caboose no!" Church yelled.
Carolina's horn pierced Cabooses chest and his eyes widened. She tried to take the horn out, but it had penetrated too deep, so she let go of the horn, dropping Caboose to the ground.
"Well at least one of you got what they had coming" Carolina said as she took out her pistol and aimed it at Church. "If only you came with me then nobody would have gotten hurt. Well besides those other horses that helped me."
"Hey, remember me?" Sarge asked.
Before Carolina could turn, Sarge charged his good leg and hit her in the chin. She found herself launched in the air. Before she managed to right herself, she heard the sound of thunder. She looked up and saw Tucker, who was diving right at her with incredible speed, electricity surging out of his body. He tackled her out of the air and slammed her right back into the ground. As she made it to her knees in an attempt to get up, Grif tackled her right back onto the ground and punched her in the throat. Carolina coughed up a little blood and let out a small laugh.
"Son of a bitch..." She said, barely managing to kick Grif off.
She started to get up, but Simmons started using a spell he had learned from Rarity to hold her in place.
"We got her!" Tucker yelled as he saw Carolina struggling feebly to get out of the hold. "I knew it would work."
"I have to admit Tucker, I'm surprised that worked." Sarge laughed, giving a swift nod of approval.
"I can't believe we won!" Grif laughed.
"Caboose?" Pinkie asked as she approached Caboose, who was laying on the ground.
The group turned to see Caboose, who was lying in a small pool of blood.
"Caboose!" Church yelled, kneeling by his side.
"Did... did we get her?" Caboose asked.
"Yeah, Caboose. Simmons has her right now. We'll decide what to do with her later." Church said with a smile.
"Good. I don't think I liked her. She was a mean lady."
"He has a punctured lung." Twilight said softly as she examined the wound. "If he doesn't get to a doctor soon I thin-"
"Hey Church?" Caboose interrupted.
"Yeah Caboose?"
"Why is everything cold?" Caboose asked, now taking deep and forced breaths. "My mom always told me... I should always bring... a jacket."
"Shut up Caboose." Church shook his head.
"I feel tired." Caboose yawned silently. "Can I go to sleep?"
"No Caboose. Stay awake." Church said, placing his hoof on Caboose's shoulder. "Please stay awake."
"But I'm so..." Caboose said, shuddering briefly. "...tired."
"No Caboose, you aren't dying on me." Church yelled, finding himself useless.
"Church, do you think they have cupcakes in heaven?"
"Yes Caboose. They have cupcakes in heaven." Church sighed sadly. "And they have cookies and everything you could ever dream of."
"Okay, good." Caboose smiled as he shut his eyes. "Is Pinkie okay?"
"Yes. Pinkie is fine thanks to you." Church said, assuring Caboose.
"Thanks to me? Yay, I'm a hero." Caboose laughed weakly. "Do you think you can do me a favor?"
"Anything Caboose. Name it." Church said, feeling a few tears roll down his cheeks.
"Can you look after her?"
Before answering, Church noticed that the blood flow from Caboose’s wound was lessening.
"Yes Caboose. I'll look after her. I promise."
But Caboose didn't say anything back.
"Caboose, stay with me." Church demanded, shaking Caboose.
Caboose just laid there smiling and after one last breath, Caboose was gone. Church slowly got back to his hooves and started to tremble. Not with fear. Not with sadness. But with anger.
"I'm so sorry Church." Twilight said quietly.
"No. You don't get to be sorry." Church said, turning to Carolina. "But she does."
"There has been enough violence." Twilight said softly. "I will make sure she gets locked-"
"That's not good enough." Church muttered, walking past Twilight. "Simmons, hold her still."
Simmons nodded, putting all he had into the spell, not wanting to be Church's target. Church looked back at Caboose and shook his head angrily.
"You don't have to do this Church." Twilight said as she blocked Church's path. "I know it hurts, but-"
"But nothing." Church yelled, throwing Twilight aside with his magic.
Church lowered his horn and charged at Carolina. The girls watched in horror as Church gored Carolina in the throat causing blood to stream freely from the wound. Church let out a bloodthirsty yell and stabbed her in the throat a second time. And then a third. And then a fourth.
"Church that's enough." Twilight said, pulling Church away.
"It's not enough." Church snarled. Church struggled for a few seconds before looking at the ground, where the grass was wet with his tears. "And it is never going to be enough."
A white flash temporarily filled the field, causing everybody to close their eyes. Church was the first to open his eyes to see Celestia standing over Caboose's body with a frown.
"You!" Church yelled in anger. "What the fuck are you doing here?"
"It's just Celestia." Twilight said, trying to hold him back. "She hasn't done anything."
"That's the problem Twilight." Church said, pushing Twilight away. "Celestia is the one to blame for this, and she knows it."
"Calm down and take a deep breath. You're making eve-"
"No, she needs to fucking hear this." Church hissed, turning his attention back to Celestia. "I honestly don't even know where to begin with you. If you're the Princess of this place, then why the hell didn't you do your damn job? You let someone come in just to hospitalize one innocent and kill another."
"If I knew about it earlier I would have intervened." Celestia said honestly.
"But you didn't. Aren't you supposed to be the one everyone can turn to here?"
"I would like to think so."
"Then what about when you turned your back on Twilight when she thought something was wrong with Cadance? I can't even imagine how she felt when the one whom she aspires to be the most just shot her down like that without a second’s hesitation. Speaking of that, you never even fucking apologized to her for that. Without her, everybody would have been overrun by the changelings and you didn't even say anything. Twilight has kept quiet about it, but I know how it feels to be abandoned by everybody. I know what it's like to feel alone. That’s why I stuck with her. She doesn't deserve to feel that way. Nobody does. But I'm willing to bet that you didn't even think of apologizing after what you did. Why? Because you couldn't admit that you were wrong. Oh, and while we're talking about the wedding, how about we bring up the part where the Queen of the Changelings shot you down with ease. When that happened, it made me think about what Twilight told me about Alicorns and how strong you are. First and foremost the fact that you're not the goddess everyone believes you to be, but rather the opposite. You're not fit to be the ruler. You're powerless."
"Church!" Twilight exclaimed.
"Caboose wouldn't be dead if you had just let us be on our way when we came in." Church continued. "But no, you thought it would be smart to change us, people you didn't even know, into horses. What kind of mindset is that? You don't know if we were dangerous or not, but you were willing to change us into a group of fucking horses and tell the people you're supposed to be protecting that they are to help us. Do you have any idea how reckless that is? We could have been just like Carolina and killed them, but you didn't even think about that. You're nothing but a stupid, weak and powerless coward."
"That is quite enough." Celestia snapped, horn beginning to glow faintly. "I could banish you for talking to me in this manner, but I understand the state you are in."
"Know what? I fucking dare you to do it." Church challenged. "Oh wait, you won't because you're a coward."
Celestia's horn shot a sudden beam of magic at Church, but Church suddenly vanished in a purple mist and the beam dissipated as it struck a tree. Celestia turned to Twilight, whose horn was glowing.
"I'm sorry Celestia but I couldn't let you do that to him." Twilight said, the glow of her horn beginning to diminish.
"Did you not listen to what he said?" Celestia asked. "He doubts my power and I am fully prepared to show him his doubts are incorrect."
"But at the cost of what? Condemning him further than he has already placed himself? He just watched someone he knows get murdered by someone that wants to use him to hurt... himself."
"Even then, that is no way to act." Celestia said flatly. "To me, or to anybody else."
"He's overcome with emotions at the moment." Twilight said somberly as she looked over to Caboose. "We all are. But you don't know what he has been through in his life, so please don't hold what he said against him. I don't want to see him get hurt anymore than he already has."
Celestia paused briefly, looking into her student's eyes. She then nodded and turned her attention to Carolina's body. She lowered her horn to Carolina's chest, enshrouding her in a golden mist that caused her to slowly disappear. She then walked over to Caboose and did the same to him.
"I will schedule a ceremony for Caboose as early as I possibly can." Celestia said softly. "And I just wish to apologize. It had not occurred to me how my actions back at the wedding would have affected you."
With a flash Celestia disappeared and the group found themselves alone in the field.
"Shame." Sarge sighed deeply, breaking the silence. "He was a good kid.
"I think we should all go home." Twilight said.
Twilight turned to see Pinkie staring at the outline of Caboose that was in the grass, before making her way next to it and laying down.
"Come on Pinkie."
"H-he's gone..." Pinkie whimpered, eyes still lingering on where Caboose once rested. "Why did she do that to him?"
"I don't know. I think she was just crazy."
"He never ever did anything to her though. Caboose didn't need to get hurt. He was the nicest stallion I've ever met." Pinkie sniffled as her tears began to fall to the ground. "If-if I hadn't said anything... if I hadn't distracted him he would still be here."
"You can't think like that."
"It's my fault." Pinkie yelled, running away from Twilight.
Twilight started to go after Pinkie, but felt something hold her back.
"Ain't no use chasin' after her like that sugarcube. If ya keep pressin' it, it'll just make her feel like she's right." Applejack said softly. Twilight blinked helplessly and let her shoulders sag. "Ah know ya want t' help, but ah think ya should just let her be fer now to let her think and git some rest. Besides, ah think ya need t' talk t' Church."
"Yeah." Twilight said, leaving without saying goodbye.
"C'mon Sarge, we should get ya patched up, looks like you've lost alotta blood." Applejack said, pushing Sarge back to the farm. "Ah think y'all should git goin' too. Ain't gunna feel better if ya just sit around feelin' sorry."
Everypony nodded in agreement as the girls said their goodbyes, both to each other and to Caboose.
"Church, are you here?" Twilight asked as she opened the door to the library. She looked at the stairs where Spike was sitting, twiddling his claws anxiously. "Spike, is Church here?"
"Yeah, but when I tried to talk to him he just ignored me and went into his room." Spike said as he looked up the stairs. "What happened?"
"I... I'll tell you later, I promise." Twilight said as she quickly went up the stairs. She stopped in front of the door and knocked. "Church are you in there?"
No answer was given. Twilight reached for the knob and turned it to find that the door was locked. She sighed and used her magic to unlock the door. She cracked the door open and saw Church sitting on the edge of the bed, looking out the window while he held a piece of paper.
"Why the hell did you do that?" Church asked calmly, not turning to see Twilight.
"Do what?"
"Put me back here."
"I didn't want you to suffer anymore than you already have." Twilight said, now walking around the bed.
"Pretty stupid of you to do what you did then, isn't it?"
"What do you mean?"
"Twilight I wanted her to do it." Church sighed.
"Why would you want that?"
"So I could have some peace for once in my damned life." Church yelled, kicking over the bed-stand. "Out of everybody I've met, I would have thought you would be able to fucking understand. If she really is as powerful as you say, I figured that if anybody had the power to finally fucking end it, it would be her."
"You wanted her to banish you?"
"I didn't want her to banish me." Church muttered, rubbing his head.
"Then wha-" Twilight began but let out a small gasp when she realized what he’d meant. "You wanted her to kill you?"
Church didn't answer, but instead looked out the window.
"I know you've been through a lot, but... why?"
"I ask myself the same question. Why? Why does bad shit always have to happen to me? Why can't something ever just go right?" Church asked, looking at the ground. "Why did he do it?"
"He did it to save you."
"But I can't die." Church snapped. "He knew that, so why the fuck did he do it?"
"There is no use worrying about it, you can't change the past, no matter how hard you try."
"Still." Church shook his head. He laid on the bed and looked at the ceiling. "I'm surprised that Celestia hasn't come for me again yet. I assume you had something to do with that?"
"Yes, I told her that you were just confused, that you didn't know what you were saying."
"I'm not going to apologize to her, so don't you even think about asking me to."
"I wasn't going to." Twilight said, allowing herself to display a sad smile. "Celestia is going to put together a ceremony for Caboose. I think you should go."
"Yeah, I'll go." Church grumbled. "Even if she's going to be there."
"That's all I needed to hear." Twilight said, giving Church a supportive hug. "And thank you."
"For what?" Church asked, surprised.
"For defending me like that."
"Don't mention it, she fucking deserved it for the way she treated you."
"It really does mean a lot to me." Twilight said, walking out the door. "And remember, I'm always here if you need anypony to talk to."
"Yeah." Church said, lifting up the piece of paper which had a poorly drawn picture on it.
It was a picture of two crudely drawn stick horses, one being blue and the other being light blue.
"Church?" Twilight called, knocking on the door to his room. "Are you awake?"
"Yeah, come in." Church grunted as he watched the rain outside his window.
Twilight opened the door and stared silently at Church, who didn't move from his spot.
"Something wrong?" Church asked.
"Celestia contacted me to tell you that the ceremony has been planned for today."
"This soon?" Church saw Twilight’s reflection nod as he looked to the mirror on the wall. "Who else is going?"
"Just the others." Twilight said, not moving out of the doorway.
"And Celestia?"
Another nod.
"Alright, just..." Church sighed.
"Take all the time you need." Twilight finished, leaving and closing the door behind her.
Church came out of the room a few moments later to see Spike sitting on Twilight's back.
"Hey Church. Sorry to hear about Caboose." Spike said awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck nervously as he tried to find some way to comfort him.
Church nodded in response, but remained silent.
"The others should be there by now." Twilight said.
They made their way through the rain, eventually coming to a large building, where there were two royal guards present in the rain.
"She would be the one to leave the people that work for her out in the rain."
"They volunteered to be out here Church. She isn't as bad as you make her out to be."
"I bet." Church muttered as the door swung open, revealing Celestia who stood by sadly.
"I'm happy that you all could make it." Celestia said.
Church simply walked past her, not even acknowledging her presence. Church looked around the building and saw a long carpet that led up to a podium in front of an altar, where there was a bouquet and a candle.
"Where's Pinkie?" Church asked curiously.
"She wasn't home when Celestia sent the message."
"How do you think she's handling it?"
"Not well. I've never seen Pinkie like this before, but trying to talk to her might do more damage than anything else. This sort of thing isn't a common occurrence here."
"Seems to be a common occurrence around me though..."
A gray pony came out of the building near them and made his way up to the podium and coughed. Church retreated into his thoughts as the pony began to give a formal eulogy, remembering all that had happened to him in the past. He snapped to attention when Twilight tapped on his shoulder lightly.
"Would anypony like to say any words?" The pony asked, looking over the small group.
"Yeah." Church said.
Church walked up to the small podium and looked at the faces of everybody present. Each of the girl’s faces were adorned with a sad look, while the guys simply stared at Church.
"Yesterday I realized I always took Caboose for granted. Out of all the shit that has happened in my life, he has been the only consistent part of it. As annoying as he was, he was always there no matter what happened, whenever I needed it. But I was too stupid to notice. And now that he's gone, I'll never get to tell him that I appreciated having him around." Church said, nodding at the bouquet that was placed next to a candle. "I'll remember you buddy."
"Church..." Twilight whispered after a few seconds of watching Church stare at the altar.
"Yeah?" Church asked, turning to see Twilight staring at him.
Church looked to his side and saw a small image appear on his flank. It was a key.
"Fuck this." Church muttered angrily, trotting out of the hall.
Twilight began to walk after him, looking back at Applejack as she did so. Applejack gave her a sad nod as Twilight turned and began to walk after Church, who was now standing in the rain, looking at the sky.
"Church-"
"I don't want to hear it." Church muttered dryly.
"Church I know what you're feeling, but do you think tha-"
"I'm sorry, did you just say you know what I'm feeling?" Church yelled, hitting the ground with his hoof. "You have no fucking idea what I'm feeling."
"You're right Church, I don't understand exactly what you're feeling. But I still want to help."
"Help? Help?" Church laughed roughly. "How the hell do you expect to help a lost cause?"
"You're not a lost cause."
"My best friend died to save me, and I never even took the time to tell him that. What kind of friend does that make me?"
"That doesn't make you a lost cause."
"What about the fact that I am forced to love somebody that does not and, for all I know, cannot love me." Church snarled. "Do you know what that feels like?"
Twilight said nothing, looking at the puddle that was forming by Church's hooves.
"And now look at this. Look at it!" Church snarled, causing Twilight to flinch. "Do you know what the fuck this is?"
"It's a key." Twilight said sadly.
"That's right, a fucking key. Memory is the key. Do you know what that tells me?" Church asked, but received no reply. "It tells me that I'm nothing but a shadow of my former self. I can never be complete. Nothing will ever go right for me. I'll always be forced to remember all the things I've ever done wrong and I can never forget them. So please, tell me how the fuck you think I'm feeling right now."
Twilight stared silently at Church, who was now watching the drops of rain hit the ground. She slowly made her way to his side and lifted his chin with her magic. Church yanked his head away and began to look at his reflection in a puddle.
"Because I sure as hell don't know..."
"That's just it Church. You don't understand how you're supposed to feel. You can't understand. Too much has happened to you that has hurt you in different ways, and with no one to put blame on, you shift that blame on to yourself. But I want to change that. I want to be there for you and help you when you need it most."
"Just go away." Church muttered, pushing Twilight away. "You can't help me."
"You can't handle this on your own, and you know that." Twilight stated. "It's just life Church, you have to take the good with the bad, even if the bad seems to be the only thing coming."
"But the bad is the only thing coming my way, I've all but lost hope for anything good."
"If you had lost hope for yourself you wouldn't be talking to me and you know it."
"Maybe." Church sighed, looking into the puddle.
"You can change Church, you just can't do it alone." Twilight said, hugging Church. "And you definitely have to try."
"I'll try." Church sighed, unconvinced.
"That's all I was hoping for." Twilight said as she tried to smile encouragingly.
Church was laying in bed, staring at the ceiling when he heard a knock on the door.
"It's your house, you don't have to knock." Church grunted, knowing it to be Twilight.
Twilight walked in and closed the door behind her.
"What can I do for you?"
"I just wanted to let you know that the girls are going to be coming over soon."
"Pinkie too?" Church asked with surprise.
"No." Twilight sighed as she shook her head. "We haven't heard a word from her for the past two weeks. I think she may be cutting herself off from everyone."
"Maybe she'll talk to me." Church suggested as he rolled off the bed.
"Are you sure she'll talk to you?"
"No, but I should at least try."
"Thank you." Twilight smiled before making her way down the stairs.
Church left the library and quickly found himself in front of Sugar Cube Corner. Church sighed and walked through the door to see Mrs. Cake placing some cupcakes on a counter, though her face looked worn.
"Is Pinkie around?" Church asked after a few seconds.
"Are you here to talk to her?" Mrs. Cake asked sadly.
Church nodded.
"Good. Poor dear needs a shoulder to lean on since Caboose passed... What happened?" Mrs. Cake asked before looking at the ground guiltily. "I'm sorry, you don't have to answer that. Pinkie is in her room."
"Thanks." Church said as he walked towards the stairs.
"It's good to see friends looking after each other when they need it most." Mrs. Cakes said as Church reached the steps.
"Yeah..."
Church went up the stairs and found himself standing in front of a door, a dim light spilling from underneath. Church cleared his throat and knocked on the door.
"Come in." Came the strained voice from inside.
Church opened the door and paused when he saw Pinkie. She was sitting on her bed, staring at the wall without so much as batting an eye. But it wasn't what she was doing that was bothering him, it was her appearance. Her hair was no longer as bubbly as it used to be... it was completely straight. Her eyes were bloodshot, either from tears or lack of sleep. Church decided that it was probably both.
"Hey Pinkie." Church muttered.
"I'm not feeling a lot like Pinkie right now..."
"I know that feeling." Church sighed, walking up next to her to sit on the bed. "How are you holding up?"
"I don't know." Pinkie shrugged.
The pair sat in silence, not quite sure what to say to each other as they both felt guilty over what had happened.
"So why are you here?" Pinkie asked quietly after a few minutes of thinking.
"I made a promise to Caboose that I would look after you. Figured it's the least I could do given what he did."
"Oh." Pinkie said quietly. "I'm sorry Church."
"For what? You didn't do anything to me."
"When Caboose first arrived he seemed to be really sad when Twilight mentioned his friends. He made it seem like he had none, but when you guys arrived here, he seemed really happy to see you. He told me lots of things that you guys did and the things you said." Pinkie said, searching her thoughts. "The things you said to him made me think you were meany and he was just trying to be nice when he tried to be your friend. He kept telling me to give you a chance, but when I did you still seemed to be as mean as I first thought you were. But now I can see that he was right all along. You are a good friend."
"I just wish I could have told him that before he died..."
"You didn't have to, don't you see that?"
"See what?"
"He didn't need to hear you say it because he knew all along that you were his friend. He's a lot smarter than you think he is."
"Yeah." Church sighed. "Think there's anything I can do to help you feel better?"
"No, that's okay. Just having somepony to talk to is nice." Pinkie said, putting her head on his shoulder. "I miss him."
"I know." Church said quietly. "So do I."
"Where's Church?" Rainbow Dash asked as the girls sat around the table in the library.
"He went to try and talk to Pinkie." Twilight said. "What have the others been like?"
"Tucker has been a lot more quiet. He hasn't even made any inappropriate comments since... well, for the last two weeks." Rainbow Dash muttered. "To be honest, I'm kinda missing them."
"Sarge hasn't changed much, though he is tellin' me abou’ th' good times he had with Caboose." Applejack said quietly. "The way he talked about him when he was here made me think that he didn't like him, but now he's makin' it seem like they were the best of friends."
"Simmons has been very strong about this. He hasn't really said anything about the matter. It seems like he is simply trying to move on."
"And what about Grif?" Twilight asked Fluttershy, who had remained silent since she arrived.
"I don't know." Fluttershy said quietly.
"You don't know?"
"Well, I just mean that he doesn't look like he has been affected by this at all. I can tell that he feels off about something though, but he seems to be hiding something."
"How has Church been doing?" Rarity asked.
"It's hard to say. Too much has happened too fast and he seems to be having trouble with his emotions. But I'm trying to help where I can to make his life easier."
The group fell into a silence and began to stare at Twilight.
"So did you just tell us to come here to talk about the others?" Rainbow Dash asked suddenly, wanting to break the silence.
"I'm glad you brought that up." Twilight said softly. "Girls I'm going to need your help."
"Anything dear." Rarity said.
"Yeah, what do you need us to do?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"I'm going to sneak into Canterlot's library."
"Ah, are ya gunna use that time spell?" Applejack asked curiously. "Ah thought it didn't work out fer ya last time."
"No." Twilight shook her head slowly. "After speaking to Church I learned that you can't change the past, no matter how much you try."
"Then why are we goin' t' the library?"
"To change the future."
"Did Starswirl the Bearded discovered a spell to visit the future?" Rarity asked nervously.
"No, he didn't." Twilight said before pausing for a brief moment to think. "Or at least not that I am aware of. I'm simply saying that we are going to change the outcome of the present."
"Yer talkin' in circles here Twi..." Applejack grunted.
"What I'm saying is we aren't going to sneak into the Starswirl the Bearded wing."
"Then where are we going?" Rainbow Dash asked, scratching her head.
Twilight looked off to Canterlot and thought for a moment before turning back to the girls and sighing.
"We're going to go to the Forbidden Wing of Archaic Magic."
"Twilight, we've been walking around Canterlot for nearly an hour. Are we there yet?" Rainbow Dash asked loudly, just to be shushed by Twilight. "What'd I do?"
"This place isn't forbidden for no reason." Twilight said, peeking around a corner to make sure there were no guards patrolling the area.
"Just how forbidden is this place?"
"Well for the most part, the forbidden part is just there to ensure that no residents come by."
"Then why are we sneakin' around if it ain't actually forbidden?" Applejack questioned.
"I would rather not let it be known that we were here."
"Ah see. N' what happens if we get caught?"
"For most ponies, being in there would be a heavy fine due to the dangerous nature of what's inside, but since it's me I'm going to assume we'd get off lightly."
Twilight went around a corner and jumped, back up against a wall. The girls quickly followed suit as a guard walked past the hallway that they were hiding in. After a few seconds Twilight peeked out and saw the guard continuing down the path. She let out her held breath and motioned the girls to follow her lead. She crouched down and quickly crawled to the other side of the hallway, stopping in front of an iron gate.
"Why doesn't this place seem guarded?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"It is guarded. Quite heavily in fact."
"I thought that the Starswirl the Bearded wing was the most heavily guarded wing."
"Technically it is. There are just more guards at the Starswirl the Bearded wing."
"But, why?" Rarity asked. "If this magic is so dangerous, wouldn't Celestia want it defended just that much more?"
"There is a spell cast on the entrance that prevents those with evil intentions from entering. Not to mention that most ponies want to be escorted into the wing by Celestia anyways."
"Why would they want to be escorted so badly?"
"Because though the tomes hold invaluable information, most scholars are too scared to go in alone."
"They're scared of books?" Applejack snorted.
"Well, sort of.” Twilight replied. “There are legends that some of the books are more than just words printed on paper. Some of them supposedly bind evil spirits and those spirits... well..."
"Well what?" Rainbow Dash interrupted nervously.
"Well some of the spirits try to reach out of those bindings with promises of power if you help them."
"Please tell me you're joking..."
Twilight shook her head and slowly made her way to the entrance, triple checking to make sure there were no guards. The girls shared an uneasy look with each other before slowly following Twilight.
"So what's the plan?"
"We go in, find a tome that entails necromancy, make sure it is safe - or as safe as necromancy can be - and then leave."
"And if ya can't find anything?" Applejack grunted.
"We ask those trapped inside if they know where one is."
"Ah don't know Twi, this sounds awfully risky..."
"Come on, we're doing this for Pinkie." Twilight begged.
"And Church?" Rarity asked.
"Yes, and Church." Twilight nodded slowly before turning to the others individually. "And Sarge. And Tucker. And Simmons. And Grif. This is affecting all of them on different levels, and you've all seen it first hoof."
"Even then, is it wise to tamper with life and death?" Rarity asked. "As much as I like Caboose, I don't feel this is the best path for us to take."
"Yeah, what would Celestia think?" Fluttershy asked.
"I'm beginning to think that I shouldn't spend all of my time trying to please Celestia." Twilight said quietly.
"What?" The girls asked in unison, astonished at her words.
"Please don't misunderstand me. I still want Celestia to be my mentor, but I realized that my friends are just as important as her." Twilight sighed, swinging the iron gate open and looking around inside. "Well here goes nothing."
Twilight used her magic to light up the room, allowing them all to take a good look at the surroundings. The layout was nearly identical to that of the Starswirl the Bearded wing, though there were no windows to the outside world and everything was covered in a layer of filth. Considering the piles of books on the floor it was clear that the original design of the room had not taken into account the possibility of so many additions. The corners of the room held many cobwebs, each abandoned by the spider that had created it, giving the room a darker feeling. The wood of the bookshelves themselves looked ancient, making it look as if this room was the first room built in all of Canterlot.
"Alright, stay close to each other. If you find anything that you think may be of use, just bring it to me without saying anything. I don't want to find out if these legends are true or not." Twilight whispered, to be given a nod by everypony.
The girls split up and began scouring the first bookshelf for anything. After finding nothing they made their way to the next book shelf. Rainbow Dash slowly made her way to one of the small towers of books. She looked at the spine of the book, but could see no name to to the amount of filth on the book.
"These books sure are dusty." Rainbow Dash said quietly, blowing some dust off of one of the books.
Rainbow Dash observed the front of the book, which had the face of a pony with glowing red eyes. She noticed something in between the eyes and leaned forward to get a better look. The eyes suddenly shifted and looked straight into Rainbow Dash's eyes, causing her to yelp in surprise as she kicked the tower of books over.
"Rainbow Dash what happened?" Twilight asked as she helped her startled friend off the floor.
"That book looked at me..." Rainbow Dash chuckled impishly, before gulping and looking back at the pile of books. "I don't think I want to be in here much longer."
"We'll pick up the pace." Twilight promised.
"Thanks."
"What is it in my home that you seek?" A voice said from under the book pile.
Twilight used her magic to remake the tower of books until she came upon a leather bound book with the face of a pony on it, which seemed to be making eye contact with each of the ponies simultaneously.
"D-did that book just talk?" Applejack stuttered.
"Why yes, yes I did." The book smirked. "But please, do not refer to me as book as I find the term vulgar."
"What should we call you?" Twilight asked nervously, thinking of a way to make the spirit forget about them so they could leave.
"The Necronomicon."
"What's a necromajikallit?" Applejack asked.
"It's the book of death." Twilight gulped.
"Come child, and search for your name and find out when your time will come." The Necronomicon urged slowly.
"Ya know when we'll pass away?" Applejack asked quietly.
"I know many things. Those that have passed, those that are going to pass, and those that are going to come into being. I also have spells to revert those that have passed, which I am believing to be what you are seeking."
"Well what are we waiting for?" Rainbow Dash asked, reaching for the book. "Let's find the spell and-"
"No!" Twilight yelped, slapping Rainbow Dash's hoof.
"Ah, you know of my curse." The Necronomicon chuckled darkly.
"Did he just say curse?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Supposedly when you read the words of the ancient scripture there are only two outcomes." Twilight explained slowly, keeping her eyes glued to the dangerous tome. "The first one is you die. The second outcome is that you are driven to insanity and lose grip on reality forever."
"It is so pleasant to hear my reputation has not diminished due to my time being tucked away."
"Why are you here and not somewhere where nopony could get you?"
"I am bound by the laws of the world to not leave this room." The Necronomicon sighed, looking among the other tombs. His eyes went back to Twilight after a few seconds and the face smiled. "That is unless somepony were to break Celestia's spell."
"No." Twilight said firmly. "We're in here to find a spell of resurrection, not to free evil spirits."
"Then by all means search the wing. You will find no notes on any spells of necromancy. I am the only tome in here that can be of aid."
"He's lyin'." Applejack grunted. "C'mon girls, there must be somethin' in here that can help us."
"My pages contain truth, nothing more, nothing less."
"Why are we talking to this silly book if we can't even use it." Rarity scoffed. "We would hardly be able to make a dead pony read this."
Rarity turned towards the door but stopped when somepony spoke up.
"What about Church?" Rainbow Dash asked quietly.
"I'm sorry darling, did you just imply that Church isn't alive?" Rarity asked, dumbfounded.
"In a way he isn't." Twilight coughed.
"Wha-"
"That's not important." Twilight shrugged off her friend’s confusion. "I'm still not sure about this though."
"I can sense pain in your voice." The Necronomicon said suddenly. "You long for someone that cannot love you back, and by bringing back someone in their lives you hope to raise yourself in their eyes."
"No, Church is just a friend." Twilight shook her head.
"I see. You can either leave and live with the death of whoever it is that has past, or take me out and I can reveal how to bring said pony back to life. The choice is yours."
Twilight looked back at the others, who stared back at her with blank expressions.
"Ah want t' say we should just move on..."
"So do I..." Rarity said quietly, stepping away from the bookshelves.
"But we're this far already, and if you think this is the right thing to do I'm behind you one hundred and twenty percent." Rainbow Dash said, walking up to the Necronomicon. "What I want to know is why it is so ready to help us?"
"Being trapped for thousands of years does that to you. I would say I long to go for a walk after being trapped for an eternity, but you know, no hooves and all make's that sentiment moot."
"Let me get one thing clear." Twilight said after weighing her options. "If we are to take you out, we are not going to allow you to bring anything into this world."
"Very well." The Necronomicon said grudgingly. "Now for the matter of taking me out, while leaving the others in."
"I'll try to cast a spell that can take you through the door, but I fear that my magic may not be strong enough to bypass it..."
"Celestia has not returned since she first cast the spell, and around what I believe to be two months ago I felt the spell lose some of its power."
"Two months ago?" Fluttershy asked. "That must have been when-"
"Yes, I think that's it as well." Twilight nodded. "But why would that cause her to lose power?"
"That, I do not know." The Necronomicon said, deep in thought.
"I'm still not sure that putting a spell on it to bypass Celestia's spell would work, even if it's power had been diminished." Rarity said.
"I sense that you do not believe her to be as powerful as you once thought." The Necronomicon said to Twilight.
"Maybe not as powerful, but still more powerful than any unicorn could hope to become." Twilight insisted.
"You try to hold hope that you are not being deceived, but-"
"What would there be to lie about?" Twilight asked as she began working on a spell to bypass the door.
"Everyone has secrets dear Twilight Sparkle."
Twilight shot a beam of magic at the tome and it began to give off a faint purple glow.
"Ah, I feel that this will work." The Necronomicon said darkly. "Now, bring me forth so we may change the ways of the universe."
"Twilight, this is your last chance, you can stop with the spell and leave if you want." Rainbow Dash whispered to Twilight.
"No, we need to do this." Twilight whispered back. "Don't forget, we're the Elements of Harmony, we have the power to stop it before it gets out of hoof if it comes to that."
"I yearn to see Equestria for what it is now, nothing more." The Necronomicon promised. "I may be the book of death, but I do not wish for destruction."
"I suppose that will have to suffice." Twilight said, placing the Necronomicon into the satchel she had brought with her. "We'll go talk to Church about this, and if he decides he doesn't want to do this we will return it back here."
"Twilight, are ya sure ya can hold it?" Applejack asked.
"I replicated Celestia's spell, so he is now bound to me and is unable to use any magic to free himself." Twilight said, slowly stepping up to the door. "I just hope that the spells won't clash."
Twilight placed her horn through the doorway. And then her head. Eventually she edged through the door and let out a small sigh.
"Now's the part where we really can't be seen."
"Church, are you here?" Twilight asked as she opened the door to the library.
"Yeah." Church called out from upstairs.
"Did you get a chance to talk to Pinkie?"
"Yes I did." Church sighed, coming out of his room. "I think she's even worse off than me..."
"Really?" Twilight asked sadly. Church nodded as he made his way down the stairs. "Is she going to be alright?"
"I'm not sure, I don't know her very well." Church said honestly. "So what did you go to talk to the others about."
"Oh, well we went to Canterlot an-" Twilight started but was interrupted by a noise coming out of her bag.
"Twilight, your bag is coughing..."
"Right." Twilight said hesitantly.
She floated the bag floated off her back and it opened when she placed it on the table. Church squinted his eyes when a large, leather-bound book fell out.
"What's with that thing?"
"I am not just a thing, thank you very much." The Necronomicon said abrasively.
"Twilight, your book is talking..."
"I am the Necronomicon, the seer of the future, the recorder of the past, and-"
"You're a book, got it." Church interrupted. "So Twilight, what's with the talking book?"
"This is a rather ancient relic that has the power to bring back the dead." Twilight answered, closing her bag and placing it on the other chair.
"You want to use a book to bring him back?" Church asked weakly. Twilight nodded, but Church simply shook his head. "Doesn't that seem kind of, oh I don't know, dangerous?"
"Come now, you're not going to judge a book by it's cover, are you?" The Necronomicon chuckled.
"Shut it."
"I don't know if you have noticed yet, but I am shut."
"Twilight, do you have any scissors? I think I want to try my hand at origami." Church growled, glaring at the book.
"Bring it on ghostie."
"Both of you calm down." Twilight said loudly, causing the two to look at her. "I thought you would have liked to bring him back..."
"But at what cost, Twilight?" Church shook his again. "I don't want him to be a mindless zombie. Well, zombie anyways."
"You seem to be misunderstand the use of my spell. I do not bring the dead back among the living as a husk of demonic power, I simply return them to their original state seconds before they died. This Caboose friend of yours will be no different than you remember him."
Church narrowed his eyes at the book, trying to tell if it's lying.
"I am not deceiving you." The Necronomicon sighed. "Just because I am the book of the dead does not mean I am evil."
"Yeah, but you're still kind of a prick."
"Being a so called prick means I'm evil?"
"No but they're pretty damn close." Church shrugged.
"Does that mean you're close to being evil too?"
"Touche." Church muttered, mind drifting to Caboose as he kept his eyes on the Necronomicon. "He'll be the same in every way?"
"Every way." The Necronomicon confirmed.
"And he won't be out for blood, crave flesh or any of that voodoo stuff?"
"Not unless he was out for blood before..."
"So how will this work?" Church asked after a few seconds.
"We go to the old castle in Everfree Forest and go into its catacombs. There is an altar with two slabs, one for the dead to lay on, and one for the living- er, reliving. Once both have taken their spots you will read a passage out of my pages and the process will begin."
"I'm not exactly the best at using magic though, so why should I read the book?"
"Well seeing as the other ponies believe you to be immortal and due to the fact that my nature would cause anypony else would either die or be driven mad."
"Oh that makes sense." Church said dismissively, before looking back to Twilight. "Wait, no it fucking doesn't, what the hell does it mean by die or driven mad?"
"There is a reason my pages have been bound shut. No mortal can gaze into me without consequence, which is why I assume they brought me to you, a pony in between the physical realms of life and death. Quite the volatile mixture."
"That's fucked up." Church said to Twilight. He turned to the book, pointing his hoof at it. "You're fucked up."
"Why I've never been so insulted in my life." The Necronomicon grunted. "Especially not by a ghost that is in serious need of a personality change."
"Listen buddy, I may be sort of like a ghost but I still know how to use fire and I will seriously fuck your day."
"You think you're the first pony that has tried to burn me? If so then you're more empty in the brain than I first thought."
"Oh, it's on paper stack." Church said, tackling the book off the table.
Twilight rolled her eyes and pulled Church off of the Necronomicon with her magic and placed him on the other side of the table. She dusted off the Necronomicon and placed him in the center of the table.
"I'll need both of you to calm down."
"He started it." The Necronomicon and Church mumbled simultaneously.
"Church, this is your call." Twilight said softly. "If you think that we shouldn't be doing it, just say so. I'm doing this for you and Pinkie, not me."
"What does this thing want in return?" Church inquired.
"I wish for nothing but the chance to be used again." The Necronomicon answered. "I have been locked away for multiple millenniums, forgotten in the sands of time. And don't get me started on my company..."
"I won't." Church nodded knowingly, having been through the same thing himself.
"That old castle you were talking about earlier, that wouldn't happen to be where the Elements of Harmony were stored?" Twilight asked.
"Oh that's right, you know of the Elements." The Necronomicon said idly.
"Yes, I am one of them."
"Oh, you were being serious..." The Necronomicon trailed off. "The Elements of Harmony are what bound me in the first place."
"And if you try anything, we won't hesitate to use them again." Twilight warned.
"I have told you multiple times that I have no such intentions. Not only have you called me evil, but now you call me a liar as well?" The Necronomicon huffed. "The nerve."
"Well Church?" Twilight asked once more.
"If he keeps to his word then I don't see the harm."
"Ah, I'm ever so happy to hear you say." The Necronomicon chuckled. "I promise to be on my best behavior."
"That's fucked up." Tucker said after listening to Church ecplain the plan to both him and Rainbow Dash.. Tucker turned to the book and pointed to it. "You're fucked up."
"Why is it that each of them said that to me when you told them about me?" The Necronomicon muttered.
"Because you're fucked up." Grif said from behind Church.
"You're one to talk, yellow-belly." The Necronomicon snapped.
"I'm orange!"
"I'll bet you are."
"He certainly does have quite the personality." Rarity whispered to Simmons.
"Tell me about it, it's like Andy all over again..." Simmons groaned.
"Is Andy another one of your friends?"
"No." All the guys said in unison.
"Come now, if you keep this up you're going to hurt my feelings." The Necronomicon pouted.
"So what, is this thing going to bring Caboose back as a zombie or something?" Tucker asked.
"If so I have thirty seven zombie plans laid out for just such an occasion." Sarge chuckled.
"No, he'll be the same apparently. The only problem is finding the place we need to get to."
"Don't mean to dampen the mood, but I think the first problem is the matter of bringing him back to life when we don't have his body." Simmons said quietly.
"That's true..." Church muttered. "How do you handle your dead here? Do you bury them or what?"
"It has been a few weeks since he passed, so it is more than likely that is the case." Twilight said sadly. "Though I would not be surprised if Celestia had preserved him somewhere."
"Let me guess, to run tests on him, right?" Church asked with anger.
"At the risk of sounding insincere, why do you seem to dislike Celestia so much?" Rarity asked.
"Church doesn't like authority." Tucker muttered.
Church kicked Tucker in the chest, knocking him to fall to the ground.
"Ow my chest!" Tucker said as he rose, rubbing his chest.
"Church, I just meant that since he saved your life she would do her best to respect him." Twilight explained. "She may have ordered him to be placed at Ponyville's morgue."
"How are you going to bring him to that castle or whatever?" Tucker asked, picking himself up off the ground. "Are you going to carry him?"
"Take me to my body and I will do the rest." The Necronomicon stated flatly.
"What do you mean by that?" Church muttered.
"I may or may not be able to inhabit him and take control of him."
"Him being possessed by one asshole is bad enough thank you very much."
"I'm just trying to help..."
"I think that he really (just) wants to take Caboose's body for his own." Tucker whispered to Church.
"For the last bloody time I am not evil!" The Necronomicon yelled. "Celestia as my witness, I will kill you if you suggest that again!"
Everypony looked at him seriously which confused him for a brief moment.
"And it just now dawned on me that my little outburst didn't exactly help my case..."
"No. No it didn't."
"Well you're making it pretty hard not to get angry what with your accusations with no basis besides oh well he just sounds evil."
"If you aren't evil then why were you locked up?" Grif asked. "It's because you're evil, isn't it?"
"Try to summon one daemon lord and suddenly everyone is on your case like you're some sort of monster..."
"Well no shit you were locked up."
"I'm joking. You know exactly why I was locked up..."
"Just Because people... die... if they read you isn't your fault though." Fluttershy said softly.
"See? She gets it." The Necronomicon chuckled.
"Okay. Well Tucker are you going to come or not?" Church asked. "Because if we're going to do it we have to do it soon."
"Fine I guess, but just because I want to be there if Caboose starts eating you."
"If any of you are having second thoughts, now would be the time to leave because once we start there's no going back..."
Fluttershy looked at the ground and mumbled something.
"You okay?" Grif asked.
"I don't know about this... this seems so wrong."
"These guys have done worse." Grif chuckled. "Listen, why don't you go hang out with Pinkie and keep her company or whatever."
Fluttershy nodded and slowly started to make her way to Sugar Cube Corner.
"Anyone else?" Church asked once more and waited five seconds for someone to speak. "Good, then let's go."
Twilight led the others to Ponyville's morgue, which was a small building located right next to the hospital. She stopped at the entrance, beginning to have second thoughts, but she looked back at Church who was giving her a concerned look.
"Something wrong?" Church asked.
"I'm beginning to think this isn't right..."
"I know but you have to listen to me. I think I would be able to live without him, but when I saw Pinkie she looked like nothing mattered to her anymore. When I made that promise to Caboose that I would look after her I meant it, and it looked like bringing him back would be the only way I could do that for him."
Twilight nodded and took a deep breath before entering through the door.
"Listen, you guys stay out here and we'll be back out soon." Church said as he walked through the door.
When he entered he saw a light blue pony with sad looking eyes at the desk.
"Hello." The pony said with a pitiful smile. "Is there anything I can do to help you?"
"Yeah we were just wondering if we could see our friend who passed away over two weeks ago."
"What is your name?"
"I'm Church."
"Any reason in particular you want to see his body?"
"We were his friends." Twilight explained.
"Oh, I'm sorry for your loss." The pony said sadly. "Are you here to say some final goodbyes?" Church and Twilight both nodded. "Follow me." The pony said, opening a door to reveal a long hallway.
She silently lead Twilight and Church to the end of the hall where there was a locked door. She took a key off the hook next to the door and unlocked it.
"Come and tell me when you're finished and I'll lock up." The pony said before making her way back to the front desk.
Twilight and Church looked at each other before walking in to the room. The room was completely empty except for a large table in the middle of the room where Caboose lay peacefully.
"He looks like he's asleep." Twilight said, examining him, instantly noting stitches. "They even managed to patch up his wound."
"We going to do this or what?" The Necronomicon asked.
"Yeah yeah." Church grunted, taking the book out of Twilight's bag. "So if we let you do this you're not going to run once you're in him, right?"
"I'm not as strong as I used to be. I have to stay within a short distance of myself to stay in control."
"Do we have to do anything?"
"No, just place me next to him and I can do the rest."
Church walked up to the table that Caboose was on and placed the Necronomicon next to his head. A red mist came out of the book and surrounded Caboose's body, quickly seeping in. Twilight and Church stared silently as Caboose's hoof twitched and he slowly sat up. Caboose's eyelids shot open, revealing a pair of red serpent like eyes that gazed around the room.
"Been awhile since I had a body." The Necronomicon said, placing his book body in Twilight's bag. "Let's hurry, I'm not sure if my power can last that long."
"Okay, I'm going to get this out of my system right now." Church muttered as the Necronomicon cracked Caboose's neck. "You're fucked up."
"You're far too kind." The Necronomicon bowed.
"Let's hurry out of here, I'm not too sure if the morgue will like us taking their property."
"Every dead pony belongs to me, so therefore I have eternal dibs." The Necronomicon laughed, walking towards the door.
"He does not belong to you."
"Lighten up, it could be worse."
"How?"
"I could look like you."
"Fuck you asshole."
"Be quiet." Twilight hushed as she reached the end of the hallway. "We're done. Thank you for letting us do this, it really means a lot to us."
"Once again I'm very sorry for your loss." The pony said quietly. "I'll go lock the room now."
"Oh I wouldn't worry about that now." The Necronomicon chuckled as he walked through the door and stared directly at the pony.
The pony stared slackjawed at the reanimated body, debating between running or fainting.
"What's the matter, never seen the reanimated dead before?"
The pony's eyes rolled up as she fell to the floor and blacked out.
"How rude, she didn't even ask if I needed anything to drink." The Necronomicon said bitterly as Twilight started checking to make sure the pony would be alright. "Well? Let's get this show on the road."
"Is she going to be alright?" Church asked.
"Probably." Twilight sighed. "At least now we don't have to explain anything to her, and with any luck she won't remember this happened."
"It isn't everyday the dead walk." The Necronomicon chuckled a he walked through the front door. "Hello everypony, how are we all doing on this fine night?"
"Man you're fucked up." Tucker said as he saw Caboose's eyes.
"You guys are in serious need of a material change..."
"Screw you cockbite."
"At least that's a new one."
"Actually, we've been saying that for a while." Simmons noted.
"Y'know, seeing these guys has gotten me curious." The Necronomicon said, scratching Caboose's chin. "Why in Equestria are the Elements of Harmony hanging out with these losers?"
"I'll show you who is a loser!" Grif said, jumping at the Necronomicon.
The Necronomicon yawned and leaned ever so slightly to the left, making Grif miss and slam his chin into the ground.
"Ow my chin!" Grif complained, rubbing his jaw.
"They may seem a lil rough around th' edges, but they mean well." Applejack said.
"Right, you continue believing that and I'll continue believing that I am a waffle." The Necronomicon said, walking away. "Let's go, we're burning moonlight."
The others looked at each other before quickly following the walking corpse towards the Everfree Forest.
"So what was it like being caged up like a lion with roid rage for so long?" Tucker asked once they reached the edge of the forest.
"To be honest it wasn't too bad." The Necronomicon sighed. "Sure nights got lonely and such, and the company there was mostly others trying to plot to take down Celestia but it gives you a lot of time to think. Thinking about past mistakes, what you would have done differently and what not."
"Such as?" Church inquired.
"Well for starters if I knew I'd be around you guys I wouldn't have said anything when they found me. That was my first mistake. Actually now that I think back on it, that's really the only thing I regret."
"You could try being a little nicer to him under the circumstances." Rarity said.
"You think he is the only one to have lost someone? Many have lost, but few have been given the chance to go back to the way thing used to be. If anypony here should be treated with more respect it should be me. Heck, I'm doing this as a freebie." The Necronomicon said as he grabbed a branch from a tree. "By the way, once this is over do you think you can write me a letter of recommendation to the Princess?"
"Why?" Twilight asked curiously.
"Why not?" The Necronomicon retorted as he released the branch, allowing it to shoot back and hit Church in the face.
"Does this letter have something to do with your plans for after this, because I know you're not doing this for the fresh air." Church said, rubbing his nose.
"You mean, do I have, like, ulterior motives?" The Necronomicon asked with genuine shock. "I'm offended, Church."
"Wounded even?" Tucker asked.
"Hurt, Church."
"Tucker, don't encourage him." Church groaned.
"Ah, here we are!" The Necronomicon boomed, gazing contemplatively at the ruins of the castle that were across an old wooden bridge.
"So where are the catacombs?" Twilight asked as she started walking across the bridge. "I didn't notice any entrance last time we were here."
"Well the entrance used to be blocked by the Elements of Harmony, but now that they're gone..."
"We can gain access." Twilight nodded slowly.
"There was a reason they were kept here rather than in Canterlot you know." The Necronomicon explained as they reached the end of the bridge. "The catacombs are a place of chaotic magic. A place where many ponies feared to tread. My old home. Celestia, however, had the idea of moving me into the Archaic Wing so she could keep a close eye on me. She only told one other about me."
"That's why I was unaware of you being there." Twilight said thoughtfully.
"Ironically it did more damage than good. She hadn't realized that when she brought me there that the one she told would have tried to read me."
"One of her friends read you?"
"Indeed."
"What was their name?"
"I have a feeling you already know the answer to that." The Necronomicon smirked, turning to enter the ruins.
"I don't think I-" Twilight began before her jaw dropped and she stared nervously into Caboose's snake like eyes. "No..."
"Indeed." The Necronomicon confirmed with a dark smile.
Twilight turned to Church, who was now crossing the bridge with Sarge.
"What are you two talking about?" Church asked.
"Oh, nothing really, just chit-chatting." The Necronomicon said quickly, walking into the ruins.
"Did he say something to bother you?" Church whispered to Twilight.
"We need to leave." Twilight said softly, beginning to walk towards the bridge.
"What did he say to you?" Church asked, firmly this time.
"I-I can't..." Twilight trailed off, trying to think of what to say next.
"You can go if you want, but I'm still doing this. We've made it too far to turn back now. And even if we did, he would still have Caboose's body and I don't like the idea of him staying in there for too long. His mind is scattered enough as is."
Twilight regretfully stopped moving and took a deep breath. She slowly turned back to Church and nodded before sullenly walking back towards the ruins.
"What's wrong with Twilight?" Rainbow Dash asked as she crossed the bridge with Applejack and Tucker.
"I don't know." Church said as Twilight disappeared into the darkness of the ruins. "Well, here goes nothing."
"This place looks like it's seen better days..." Sarge muttered as he entered the ruins of the destroyed castle.
The walls looked as if they ere ready to collapse at any second if not for the vines that seemed to be holding them in place. Cobwebs were strewn about over every crevice and crack, giving the walls a feel much like the Archaic Wing in Canterlot. At the end of the room was a large statue that had a large sphere on top. underneath that sphere the statue branched off in five directions, and at the tip of each branch was a small platform that had a small dip to hold other spheres.
"Ah, without the elements in place it looks so much more barren in here." The Necronomicon smiled. "I love it."
"Where is the entrance?" Grif asked as he approached the statue.
"Underneath that."
"Yeah, good luck moving that." Grif chuckled. "It must weigh a ton."
A bat came down from the ceiling and landed on Grif's face.
"Holy shit a bat!" Grif cried, going on his hind legs and flailing his fore legs. "Get it off, get it off!"
Grif took a step back and hit a tile, which suddenly sunk in the ground, causing the statue to slowly start moving back. The bat then flew off his face and went out the window.
"One of the idiots found out!" The Necronomicon said with fake excitement. "Hold on, maybe I have some dog treats you can have."
"Is it gone?" Grif asked, now on his back.
"Get up." Sarge grunted, kicking him in the ribs.
"Ow, my ribs!"
"You are all idiots." The Necronomicon sighed. "Every one of you."
"So it's down there, huh?" Rainbow Dash asked, flying towards the entrance of the catacombs. "It's pretty dark down there."
"Oh I wonder why? Maybe because nopony has been down here for over a millennium."
Twilight approached the stairs and felt a certain power emanating from below.
"You feel it call for you, don't you?"
"What?" Twilight asked, breaking focus on the stairs.
"The magic from the room down there. Certainly brings back memories, like opening a scrapbook!" The Necronomicon sniffled before coughing and turning around. "Why did I just say scrapbook?"
"Seems like Caboose is rubbing off on you." Church began to chuckle.
"Let's hurry, I don't feel like staying in here for much longer." The Necronomicon said, face pale.
"Give me a moment." Twilight said, using her magic to grant the others the ability to see in the dark. "There we are."
The Necronomicon nodded and began walking down the stairs. The others took a few seconds to get ready and began to follow him into the bowels of the castle.
"Are we there yet?" Grif yawned after several minutes of walking down the stairs.
"Almost." The Necronomicon nodded.
After what seemed like half an hour the Necronomicon came to a stop.
"Is this it?" Rainbow Dash asked as she bumped into the Necronomicon.
"No, now we have to keep going down the steps that aren't there." The Necronomicon said with mild annoyance.
The room lit up due to Twilight casting another spell, showing everything that was held in the room. There were two stone slabs located in the middle of the room with six statues of ponies facing the slabs.
"Who are they?" Twilight asked curiously.
"Them?" The Necronomicon chuckled. "They're the watchers."
"The watchers?"
"They were supposed to come to life when and if I was taken out of here, but for some reason they didn't." The Necronomicon said as he laid on one of the stone slabs. "Oh well, place me next to me."
"Are you sure they won't come back if we take you out again?" Rarity asked.
"They would have already if they sensed me come back, so I'm going to say yes I'm sure."
Twilight nodded and placed the book next to him. A red mist came out of Caboose's lips and slwoly enveloped the book. Caboose's body went still and the Necronomicon opened it's eyes.
"There we are." The Necronomicon chuckled. "Now lay on the other slab and open me."
"Yeah." Church muttered as he laid on the slab.
"This looks like something out of a horror movie." Tucker grunted.
"Twilight, give it to me." Church said, holding out his hoof.
Twilight grabbed the Necronomicon and began making her way over to Church, but stopped a few feet away from him.
"Hurry up, I'm beginning to feel a little stiff."
"Bow chicka bow wow."
"Shut the fuck up." Church muttered. He then pulled his hoof towards his chest. "Come on, what are you waiting for?"
Twilight edged towards Church and reluctantly gave him the book, before stepping back and looking at the ground.
"So do you know for a fact this will work?" Church asked.
"It wouldn't be fun if I knew that." The Necronomicon said giddily. "Let's go. Open me. Openmeopenmeopenm-"
"I will if you shut up."
"Okay." The Necronomicon said sadly.
"So is there any specific page?"
"When you open me you will find the page you need.'
Church opened the book and a a dark mist shot out of the book and began sinking into Church. Twilight ran towards him before finding herself flung backwards by a magical force.
"Now I know this looks bad, but this is just the process." The Necronomicon said as Church began floating in the air. "It has to look evil otherwise everypony will do it."
After a few seconds the mist came out of Church and went back into the book.
"Okay, I'm going to need one of you to catch me on three. One. Two..."
The Necronomicon then landed on the floor between the two slabs and grunted.
"Darn, timing was off."
A small white light appeared on Church's chest. The light grew to twice it's size and flew towards Caboose, where it landed on his chest. A small beam came out of Church's chest and connected with the light, linking the two of them together.
"Might want to cover your ears." The Necronomicon laughed.
Caboose quickly sat up and began to yell which made the group cover their ears.
"It really is quite a painful process, though we are nearing the end so do not worry."
Caboose stopped yelling and fell on his back, eyes wide open.
"Caboose?" Twilight asked in a hushed voice.
"Oh hello Twilight! Where are we?" Caboose asked with a laugh. "This place sure is spooky. Hey look a book!"
Caboose trotted up the book and picked it up with his teeth.
"Put me down this instant!" The Necronomicon said harshly.
"Oh my gosh it talks! Do I get three wishes?" Caboose asked hastily. "For my first wish I would like some ice cream. For my second wish I want a second bowl of ice cream. And-"
"I am not a genie!" The Necronomicon shouted.
"But I didn't even get to say my third wish." Caboose pouted.
"Fine, what is your third wish?"
"I wish you were a talking book!"
"Granted." The Necronomicon said sarcastically. "Now onto-"
"It worked!" Caboose jumped up and down. "Where is my ice cream?"
Suddenly, another beam shot out of Church's chest, this time towards Tucker.
"Son of a bitch!" Tucker yelled, jumping to the ground.
The beam shot over Tucker and struck the wall where it soon began to ricochet between all the objects in the room. After a few seconds it bounced off of one of the statues and hit Church in the chest, causing him to fall off the slab.
"Ow my chest!" Church yelled, clutching his chest.
"Church!" Twilight yelled, running to his side. "Are you okay? You're not hurt are you?"
"Yeah, I'm-" Church stopped mid sentence and began to shake.
"Church?" Twilight asked nervously.
Church did not reply, instead he started to scream.
"What's happening to him?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Put him on the slab." The Necronomicon said quickly.
"Wha-"
"Put him on the slab now!" The Necronomicon snapped.
Rainbow Dash nodded and quickly dragged Tucker to Church where they hastily put him on the slab. Church continued to scream, voice clearly beginning to strain.
"What's wrong with him?" Tucker asked. "Is he going crazy again?"
"No, this is something else." The Necronomicon said, beginning to panic.
Church slammed his eyes shut and his body went limp on the slab. The group stared silently at Church, waiting for him to get back up.
"Church?" Caboose asked, poking him in the tummy.
Church's eyes shot open, this time several beams shot out of his chest and began hitting everything in the room.
"Everyone get down!" Twilight yelled as she jumped to the ground, everybody in the room quickly followed her lead.
The sound of the beams hitting everything quickly came to a stop and Twilight raised her head and began to look around the room. She felt something was off but she couldn't find the reason why. She turned her attention back to Church, who was now sitting up and panting heavily.
"What happened?" Church asked quietly.
"You got hit by one of those beams an-"
"Shh." Church hissed. "Do you hear that?"
"Hear what?" Twilight asked, trying to hear anything out of place.
"The voices."
"Voices?"
Church slowly turned to the statues and squinted his eyes. The girls looked at each other, feeling a large sense of unease pass through each of them.
"Them. They sound familiar..." Church said, before his eyes shot open and he turned around. "We need to get out."
"I think Church went crazy." Rainbow Dash said quietly, trying to pull Twilight away from Church.
The six statues that surrounded the slabs suddenly exploded in a mist of dust and rock, and in each of their place was a pony each one a different color and build.
"Should we run?" Rarity asked.
One of the living statues, which was now a red earth pony, snarled and charged towards the group. The pony had a certain fire in his eye that made the guys feel extremely disturbed.
"Yes, yes we should." Simmons said nervously.
Another one of the other living statues jumped off of its pedestal, but this one landed in front of the enraged pony. It turned it's head to face Church, showing a pair of eyes that appeared to be flickering between black and green.
"Run Epsilon!" The green unicorn snapped, using its magic to throw the red earth pony into the wall.
The group didn't need to be told twice so they quickly began running towards the stairs. But Church simply stared at the green unicorn, who was now trying to fend off the other living statues.
"Blue get your ass in gear!" Sarge yelled.
Church ignored Sarge and began walking towards the green unicorn.
"What is he doing?" Grif asked.
"Delta?" Church croaked.
The red pony got off the floor and charged at Delta.
"Delta watch out!" Church yelled, ramming himself into the red pony to disorient it.
Before the red pony gained its senses but the room flashed green and the group found themselves in Twilight's library. Delta sat in the middle of the room and began to concentrate on the situation.
"Delta?" Twilight asked quietly.
"Yes Twilight Sparkle, how can I be of assistance?"
"Oh good, you know my name." Twilight sighed. "What happened back there?"
"Do the others know of Epsilon's origins?" Delta asked curiously.
"No, they don't."
"Then it is required that they know before we go further. The other fragments of the Alpha were all but eviscerated after the E.M.P-."
"Emp." Tucker corrected.
"E.M.P." Delta retorted. "It stands for "Electromagnetic P-"
"It stands for emp." Church said. "It's an emp."
"Moving on. When the E.M- emp went off, it deleted me as well as the other AI fragments."
"What is an AI?" Rarity asked.
"Please don't get him start-"
"An AI is a fabricated source of intelligence, or Artificial Intelligence if you will. Epsilon, the other fragments and I were a part of the AI named Alpha. And when he was forced to go through many trials in which he is forced to never succee-"
"Anypony know what he is talking about?" Rainbow Dash asked bluntly.
"Church is Epsilon." Twilight explained. "He was a part of the Alpha when he was put through many tests where he had no possible chance of success. This caused him to go crazy and the Alpha split off into multiple other AI's, or personalities. Delta is logic and Church is the Alpha's memory."
"That's why he got his mark when he said-"
"Memory is the key." Delta nodded. "Epsilon somehow survived the pulse, and because he is memory he retained knowledge of the other fragments and I, so when that beam struck him it somehow brought us back through his memories of us."
"Didn't Sigma try to bring all of the AI's back together to recreate the Alpha?" Twilight asked edgily.
"That is correct."
"Then shouldn't we be back there trying to keep them apart?"
"That is not necessary as of yet." Delta said, shaking his head. "For now, they feel nothing but what they are. Omega has his rage, Gamma has his deceit, Sigma has his creativity, Allison feels nothing but failure and Theta ha-"
"Allison?" Church asked. "You mean Tex? Tex is alive?"
"Yes."
"We have to go in there and get her."
"That would be most unwise. In the state they are all in they would surely kill you. The best course of action would be to stay and get a nights rest, which will allow them to leave the catacombs and split up into the surrounding area, where we can try to trap them when they are alone."
"How can we be sure you're not as dangerous as them?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"I am the Alphas logic, I have no mere primal instincts like the others."
"So what was with you throwing O'Malley back there?" Tucker asked. "I thought you were opposed to fighting."
"Normally that would be the case, but under the circumstances it was necessary. Had I not intervened there was a high probability that one of you would have been fatally injured. Now for the matter of resting. Everyone should go home and go to sleep as soon as possible. You will all need to be in top condition for this."
"I like the way he thinks." Grif yawned as he walked out the door. "C'mon Caboose, I need to go pick up Fluttershy."
"Okay!" Caboose said excitedly, hopping after Grif.
"You should go too." Twilight whispered to Church.
"Yeah." Church nodded, quickly catching up with Grif and Caboose.
Once they arrived at Sugar Cube Corner, Church walked up to the door and knocked.
"It's open." A voice said from inside.
"Listen Caboose, I'm going to need you to stay out here while I go talk to them." Church said slowly.
"Alrighty." Caboose said happily.
Church gave Caboose an appreciative nod and walked into the sweets store to see Mr. Cake taking some treats off of display.
"Hello Church, what brings you here this late?"
"Listen, I'm going to need you to stay calm and keep an open mind, okay?"
"I'd like to think I always keep an open mind." Mr. Cake said with a small laugh.
"You say that now..." Church muttered. "Come in."
Caboose ran through the door and up to the counter and began to look at all the cupcakes on display. Mr. Cake's eyes shot wide open and he fell to the floor unconscious.
"So much for keeping an open mind." Grif chuckled as he threw a cupcake into his mouth. "Hey these are really good."
"They're the best." Caboose agreed.
"Let's go upstairs and find Fluttershy and Pinkie so you can stop eating and sleep."
"Eat or sleep. Man that's is a tough choice."
"Shut up." Church muttered, making his way up the stairs.
Caboose and Grif looked at each other before they followed Church up to Pinkie's room. Church coughed and knocked on the door a few times.
"Who is it?" Pinkie asked.
"That's your cue." Church said, elbowing Caboose in the side.
"Oh yeah." Caboose laughed before turning around and walking away from the door.
"Where's he going?" Grif asked Church.
"It's Caboose, I've learned not to question what he does on account of there never being an obvious answer."
"Good point."
Caboose jumped in the air and did a one eighty degree spin. He then bent over and charged towards the door, taking it off of its hinges as he tumbled across the floor and crashed into the bed.
"Oh dear." Fluttershy said, flying over to Caboose to help him up.
"Sorry, there was a door on my way." Caboose said as he sprung back to his feet. He looked over to Pinkie who was laying on her bed with a look of confusion. "Hello!"
Pinkie scooted backwards on the bed, scared of Caboose. Gummy suddenly jumped from under the bed and latched onto Caboose's head.
"Hello Gummy, it is nice to see you too." Caboose giggled as he patted Gummy on the tummy. Caboose jumped onto the bed and landed next to Pinkie. "Why are you sad?"
Pinkie lifted a shaky hoof and poked Caboose's leg. She slowly edged forward and poked him on the chin, which made him laugh.
"Y-you're alright." Pinkie said weakly, tears now beginning to well in her eyes.
"I'm not alright, I'm Caboose!"
Pinkie laughed through the tears and began to hug Caboose with no intent of letting go.
"So greenie, you're a ghost like that other idiot?" The Necronomicon asked.
"No, I am an-"
"AI yadda yadda, I don't believe in any of those crackpot theories."
"You do not believe that ghosts are a crackpot theory?" Delta asked.
"I'm living proof that they aren't buddy boy."
"Living may be a term not suited for you."
"What do you mean by that?" The Necronomicon asked harshly.
"Much like me you have a physical manifestation but we do not require things that living things do, such as eating or sleeping."
"I'm more than a physical manifestation! I'll show you!" The Necronomicon yelled, trying to move towards Delta.
"You are a book." Delta said, placing his hoof on the Necronomicon. "A talking book, but a book nonetheless."
"I'll show you whose a book!"
"What does that mean?" Delta asked, silencing the Necronomicon for a few seconds.
"You win this round..."
"I would like to believe that I will win every round due to me being far more insightful than you."
"Twilight, Delta is calling me names!" The Necronomicon pouted.
"And?" Twilight asked from the room over.
"Nobody sides with Ol'Necky." The Necronomicon grunted.
"Maybe it is due to the fact that you are misunderstood." Delta suggested.
"Tell me about it..."
Twilight came out of the kitchen with two cups of tea and placed them on the table.
"Aw, you shouldn't have." The Necronomicon said happily.
"Shouldn't have what?" Twilight asked.
"Gotten me a cup of tea."
"One is for me and one is for Delta." Twilight laughed. "What would a book do with a liquid?"
"Nobody sides with Ol'Necky." The Necronomicon repeated, more quietly this time.
Twilight rolled her eyes and put the Necronomicon in the bookshelf to silence him.
"You brought me tea?" Delta asked, walking up to the table.
"Yes, I thought you could use it."
"But I do not require it so I have no use for it as I am an AI."
"Church needs to eat and sleep just as much as me, so something tells me that you do too."
"But that is impossible." Delta said.
"Even so, it would be rude to reject my offer in my own home."
"Very well." Delta said, clearing his throat.
He slowly approached the table and used magic to bring the cup to his mouth. He examined the liquid as well as the steam that was coming out of the surface before taking a small sip. He placed the cup back on the table and began to stare at it.
"What is this feeling I have in my mouth?"
"You mean tasting?"
"I do not think this is tasting, I believe it has something to do with the temperature at which you gave the tea to me."
"It is hot, so maybe it is pain that you're feeling."
"Ah, pain." Delta nodded slowly. "I do not enjoy it."
"Most don't." Twilight said with a small laugh.
"I can see why. It provides quite the discomfort in the area it is affecting."
"Delta do you think you could help me?"
"I am not sure if it is possible."
"Not sure if what is possible?" Twilight asked confusedly.
"For someone to love more than one person. That is what you were going to ask after all." Delta said as he looked through the books. He grabbed one off the shelves and began reading it while Twilight stared at the ground. "I do not think that would be wise."
"Wha-"
"For you to ask him that same question when he gets back. Epsilon's mind is unstable, much like mine as well as the other AIs, so I do not think that would be the best course of action."
"I never said I liked Church."
"I was incorrect?" Delta asked hesitantly. "I apologize, I had just assumed. In that case it is entirely possible for one to love more than one other, but Church has fabricated love and cannot deny it, no matter how hard he tries."
"Is there-"
"-anything you can do?" Delta finished, shaking his head. "Not that I can see."
"How do you know wh-"
"-at you are going to say? I merely think through all the things I would believe you to say, then I narrow them down to the most probable ones by the time you begin speaking. By that point I narrow the selection even further by the first few words of the question or statement and come to the conclusion of what you are going to say prior to you saying it." Delta explained matter-of-factly. "You of all sentient ponies should know that. It's quite simple really."
The door to the library swung open and Church slowly walked in and looked between Twilight and Delta.
"I am going to assume that everything went well?" Delta asked.
"Yeah, it did." Church yawned. "If you don't mind I think I am going to go to bed."
"Good, I will wake you in the morning for when we need to go."
"Lovely." Church muttered sarcastically before climbing the stairs. "Night Twilight."
"Good night Church." Twilight nodded.
Church closed the door to his room, leaving Twilight to her thoughts.
"For what it is worth he trusts and respects you more than I would've thought possible. In fact he doesn't even trust himself. But he values your friendship much more than you think, and that may be what he needs more than anything else."
"Thank you Delta." Twilight said with a smile and a nod.
"Now, like the others, I would recommend you get some rest for tomorrow." Delta said pensively. Twilight opened her mouth to speak but Delta spoke up again. "I am not quite sure what we are going to do with them once we catch them. Being the Alpha is not what needs to happen, nor is putting the AIs back inside his head the best of moves. There is a chance that we could convince them to live life as they see fit, but that could raise more problems. I will dwell on this when you are sleeping."
"What are you two talking about?" Pinkie asked, appearing from behind Delta.
"Where did-"
"-I come from?" Pinkie asked. "Around. Who are you?"
"Oh, this is Delta, he is a green pony!" Caboose said, appearing in front of Delta.
Delta turned to Twilight with a look of confusion.
"I don't know how either, but somehow they can do that." Twilight shrugged.
"How are you to able to do that?" Delta inquired.
"I used my mouth, see?" Caboose said as he opened and closed his mouth repeatedly.
"Yes Caboose, I am fully aware of the concept of speaking, I am merely noting the impossibility of appearing out of thin air without any prior presence in the-"
"Gee, he talks a lot doesn't he?" Pinkie giggled, poking him in the back. Delta closed his eyes and attempted to think of a reasonable explanation for her appearing. "Well it's nice to meet you Mr. Delta!"
"It is nice to see you too Pinkie." Delta said quietly. Delta opened his eyes and looked around the room, where Caboose and Pinkie were now missing. He turned to Twilight and coughed. "How..."
"You're preaching to the choir, Delta." Twilight laughed as she walked up the stairs.
Church was awoken by the sound of knocking. He slowly sat up and stared at the door.
"Can I come in?" Spike asked from the other side of the door.
"I guess so." Church grunted.
"How are you feeling?"
"Good, why?" Church asked as he rubbed his face.
"Twi kinda filled me in on what's happened." Spike said as he hopped onto Church's bed.
"You manage to understand it?"
"I think so." Spike said quietly. "That Delta guy kinda talks a lot."
"Yes he does." Church laughed.
"So what are you going to do to them?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean are you going to try an put those other guys back in your head?"
"I'll tell you when I figure that out."
"Well, Delta just wanted me to tell you that the others are here and that I should wake you up."
"Thanks then." Church yawned. "Tell him I'll be down in half a minute."
"He said to take as much time as you need." Spike chuckled as he jumped off of the bed to make his way to the door. "Don't worry I'll tell him you said thanks."
“Glad to hear it.” Church sighed, falling back down on the bed to stare at the ceiling.
Spike closed the door and looked down the stairs to see everyone Delta giving Pinkie a curious eye.
“You are quite the oddity.” Delta remarked as Pinkie hopped around the room. “This may be used to our advantage if I can just figure out how you work.”
“Please don’t try to understand it Delta, just leave it be.” Twilight insisted.
“But she is a logical impossibility, I must know how she does it.” Delta said. he turned up the stairs and looked at Spike. “He will be down in half a minute.”
“If you know that then why did you make me go up there?” Spike asked.
“It is to my understanding that you would like to feel useful so I have created a use for you.”
“Gee, thanks.” Spike muttered.
“You do not approve?”
“Well I don’t think going to get Church is really that helpful.” Spike said as he grabbed a bowl of gems off of the table.
“I apologize, I will try to think of ways you can help after we get the other pieces back.”
"Maybe I could help with that." Spike suggested as he grabbed a gem out of the bowl and threw it in his mouth.
"No, you're staying here." Twilight said firmly.
"But I never get to go on any adventures with you guys..."
"That's because I don't want to see you get hurt."
"But I can breath fire! I can totally help!"
"I'm sorry Spike, but this is going to be extremely dangerous..."
"Actually, I believe a dragon could prove to be quite useful in these circumstances." Delta said.
"See?" Spike beamed as he jumped onto Twilight's back. "He's logic, he knows what he's talking about."
"What about me?" The Necronomicon muffled from the bookshelf.
"You are a book, you can be of no help to us." Delta answered.
"Okay, I changed my mind. You red and blue guys are alright." The Necronomicon grunted. "It's the green guy that I can't stand now."
"I regret to inform you but that does not sound like a direct insult to me, but more of a complement to the others."
"I hate you so much..."
"So what's the plan?" Sarge asked as he kicked the air with his feet.
"The plan is we capture them." Church said as he came from downstairs.
"That would be the better road to travel." Delta nodded.
"How the hell are we going to catch them? Do you have a net?" Grif asked.
"We are going to try and talk to them and get them to come back."
"Are you kidding?" Simmons asked. "That's a terrible plan!"
"How so?" Delta retorted. "I am not sure if they can go back into Church's mind, and we cannot recreate the Alpha."
"Why not?"
"Because you do not want to die."
"Oh that's reasonable." Simmons said sincerely.
The girls looked at each other while the guys just nodded at each other.
"If he becomes this Alpha we may die?" Rarity asked nervously.
"It is not a matter of you may die, but a matter of you will die." Delta said as he shook his head. "The Alpha is unstable, and bringing him back together has a ninety nine percent chance of destruction with a one percent margin of error.”
The girls looked at each other and then to Church, beginning to grow fearful of him.
"He is not going to harm you, and I do not believe he appreciates you staring at him believing that to be the case."
"Is there anything stopping those other guys from trying to get put back together?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"They do not have their memories anymore now that they have been split off from Epsilon, so they have no need or recollection of the Alpha."
"Is there any way that they will gain their memories back?" Twilight asked.
"When Epsilon nears them they may begin to slowly get them back, but since they are not working together we will not get overwhelmed by them."
"How are you so sure they're not working together." Rainbow Dash asked skeptically. Delta opened his mouth to answer but Rainbow Dash nodded. "Right, you're logic or whatever."
"You sound unconvinced."
"How do we know that you aren't working with the others to become the Alpha?"
"Because I have no need for it." Delta said calculatingly. "Are you ponies always so slow to trust?"
"Yes." The Necronomicon answered before the others could.
"This isn't getting us anywhere." Church said loudly, causing the others to turn to him. "We need to stop talking and get them already, I don't want them to cause too much damage to the surrounding area."
"That would be best." Delta nodded. "Grif, you will need to stay close to Church."
"Why's that?" Grif asked hesitantly.
"Because I have a feeling that Allison will be drawn to Epsilon."
"And what does that have to do with me?"
"I have a feeling that you would be quite the help when we face Allison."
"Grif. Help?" Sarge sputtered.
"Fuck you Sarge." Grif said before turning his attention back to Delta. "How do you figure I'd be any help with Tex?"
"It is quite simple." Delta said, walking out the door. "When she gains her senses back we will need bait."
"Bait? What are you..." Grif muttered. "Oh fuck you Delta. If I could flip you off right now, I totally would."
"What does did he mean by bait?" Fluttershy asked.
"We'll just leave it at Tex holds a grudge on Grif's manhood and Delta wants to use that to our advantage."
"His manhood?" Fluttershy asked, turning to Grif. She stared at him for a few seconds until she saw Grif instinctively holding his crotch. Fluttershy averted her gaze and began to blush when she figured it out.
"Tell me about it." Grif sighed. "Let's get this over with so I can go back to sleep."
"Something tells me you're going to need to sleep on your back for the next couple of months after today." Tucker said as he walked past Grif. "So where to first?"
"I would suggest starting at the area at which they were brought back." Delta said as he looked at the sky. "There may be clues to their whereabouts there."
The group quickly got ready and set off for the castle's ruins in an attempt to find any clues that could lead to any of the fragments. Church, Twilight and Spike were a few meters behind Delta who was ahead of the pack while the rest of the group kept a few meters behind Church because the girls were still not too sure on either Church's or Delta's intentions.
"So." Spike said suddenly as they neared Fluttershy's cottage.
"So." Church repeated.
"Do you think those other guys like you could live in Ponyville?" Spike asked. "I mean, Delta sorta seems alright, but what about that rage guy and the deceit guy?"
"I'm not sure." Church shrugged.
"Don't you think it would be better to come up with a plan before doing this then?"
"I'm open to suggestions."
"Well we could ask Celestia-"
"Okay I'm going to stop you right there. I don't want that bitch to have anything to do in my affairs."
"So you really don't like her, huh?" Spike said quietly.
"That's an understatement." Church grunted.
"Y'know, maybe the reason the girls are kinda wary of you know is because you hate Celestia so much."
"As far as I'm concerned they can think what they want and I can think what I want." Church shrugged. "It's not like I'm hating on her for no reason. She treats her so called subjects poorly, and what goes around comes around."
"Please Church, she does what she feels is necessary." Twilight insisted.
"How can you still defend her after the wedding?"
"She just didn't have enough time to apologize, that's all." Twilight said confidently.
"She's the Princess, she can make time."
"Church-"
"Your arguing is nonsensical. I would advise both of you lay this conversation to rest unless you wish to say something both of you will regret." Delta said loudly, as he entered the forest.
"Glad somebody said it." Tucker muttered.
"So what are the others like? I understand that they have larger traits that define who they are, but that cannot be their only attribute."
"O'Mally likes to talk a lot, Tex is a complete psycho bitch, Sigma seems to want a lot of power and Gamma says terrible jokes."
"Okay, what else?"
"That's pretty much all we know."
"So we don't know where they are, we don't know what they're like and we don't have a plan?" Rainbow Dash muttered disbelievingly.
"Exactly."
"I don't think this is going to end well..."
"Well when you put it that way of course it doesn't."
"What way would you put it in to make it sound better?"
"We'll play it by ear." Tucker said with a smile. "Y'know, ad-lib. Wing i-"
"I don't think the following sentence can be said enough. This seems like a horrible idea."
"Of course it is." Simmons said. "If it was a good idea we wouldn't be the ones doing it."
"Hey, uh, I just thought of something." Grif muttered. "What's stopping the AI guys from trying to possess us or whatever?"
Delta stopped and looked back to Grif, trying to think of something to say.
"That's what I thought. So should we-"
"No, this is good. We now have the means of which to capture them, that is assuming they are still capable of doing so."
"Here's an idea, how about we turn back and leave and just let those guys live in the forest." Grif said sincerely. "It's not even that bad in there. I mean sure, there are those wolves..."
"And snake chicken things..." Tucker added.
"And the multi-headed lizard..."
"No Church blew that one up, remember?"
"Oh yeah. Well there you go, now it's not even so bad in there. Sure they might get turned into a tree or a statue, but so what?" Grif asked.
"They will not be stopped by mere animals." Delta explained. "They may not be functioning as fully as they will be, but they are still infinitely more dangerous than most of the creatures in this forest. If we do not find them then they will undoubtedly end up finding us. It is best if we are the ones doing the finding since it allows us to have the element of surprise and possibly end this quickly before it gets out of control."
"Want to know what? Fuck you and your logic."
"I do not believe that is physically possible, nor would I want to do so even if it were." Delta said. Grif opened his mouth to argue, but Delta interrupted him. "We are approaching the bridge so I would suggest calming yourself unless it is in your interest to see if there are any of the fragments nearby. More specifically if you wish to see if Allison recalls who you are."
Grif looked quickly looked around and ducked behind a bush.
"I find your decision to be quite agreeable."
"Shut up."
"Tucker I would recommend that you stand guard out here while the rest of us go inside."
"What? Why?" Tucker asked hesitantly.
"Because we will need someone to notify us if any of the other fragments come back."
"Why can't I stay out here?" Grif asked. "I can totally stand guard."
"Your eye is not as keen as Tucker's." Delta remarked as he began to walk over the bridge.
"My eyes are totally keen." Grif grumbled as he trudged across the bridge.
One by one the group crossed the bridge until everyone but Tucker was looking through the doorway. Some of the pillars that were upright were now destroyed, the vines ad cobwebs had been torn off the walls and the statue that was in place to hold the elements was cracked in half.
"Okay Grif, you go to the middle of the room and see if any of them are watching." Church said, pushing Grif ahead of him.
"Fuck that, look at the place. It's a wreck. Whoever did this is probably long gone."
"I do not believe this to be the case." Delta said as he looked at the damage done to the building. "One of them may be using this place as shelter for the night."
"But why do I have to do it?"
"Because you are the most disposable."
Grif sighed and walked to the middle of the room and began to look at the pillars, checking to make sure nobody was hiding behind them.
"Say something." Church said quietly.
"Anybody here?" Grif called out. After no answer he smiled and began to walk back to the others. "What can I say? I tried my hardest. Oh well, no harm no fou-"
"Hello?" A weak voice said, which caused Grif to come to a slow stop.
Grif turned around to see a dark gray pony came out of the shadows of one of the pillars. She looked to be strong, but she had crimson red hair that swept over her face which gave her a weak demeanor. Because the pony appeared harmless, making the girls think that she was not apart of the Alpha, but simply just lost. It wasn't until Church groaned that the girls understood who it was.
"Tex."
"Oh shit." Grif said, taking a few steps back.
"What?" Tex asked, turning her head to see behind her. "What's wrong?"
"Please don't kill me, I'm far too lazy to die."
"Hurt you? Why would I do that?"
"Like you don't know." Grif said weakly as he bumped into one of the fallen pillars.
"I don't remember anything, okay?"
"Yeah fucking right, you tell me that now but once my back is turned BOOM. You hit me in my balls again."
Tex gave Grif a look of confusion but said nothing.
"Do you really not remember or are you just trying to get my guard down?" Grif asked seriously. "Because if it's the second thing, that's seriously uncool."
"Listen, all I know is I woke up and there was a bunch of other horse assholes that began fighting each other. I came up here, but a red one chased me and pretty much broke everything in here. I tried to fight back, but well..." Tex trailed off as she showed her ribs, which had a series of bruises on it. "Let's just say that guy is an asshole. That's all I know right now, and you babbling on isn't exactly making anything clearer."
"Oh well in that case, you were one of my closest friends and you would never hurt me."
"Really?" Tex asked bluntly.
"Yup."
"You don't seem like the sort of guy I'd hang around..."
"What is that supposed to mean?"
"No offense, but you sort of seem like an idiot. Actually now that you mention it, something about you seems-"
"Yeah well we're actually best friends if I remember it right." Grif said quickly.
"If we're best friends then why did you act like I was going to kill you?"
"Oh that. That's just a little joke we like to do, don't you remember. Please don't rip my skull out and beat me with it." Grif laughed weakly. "See? A joke."
Tex gave him a small frown and looked around the room until her eyes rested on the stallion walking towards her.
"Huh. And those more of our friends?"
Tex began to focus on Church's cutie mark and shuddered violently. Her eyes became cloudy and she began to sway back and fourth, giving the sense that she was going to fall. Grif stepped forward and stopped her, giving her time to regain her balance.
"Grif?" Tex asked suddenly, voice back to it's normal strength.
"Oh hey, she remembers me." Grif laughed. With a sigh of relief he let her go and dusted himself off before starting to walk away. His eyes darted back to Tex who was giving him a harsh glare. "Oh fuck she remembers me!"
Tex grabbed Grif by the tail as he attempted to run away, pulled him towards her and slammed her hoof into his crotch. Grif let out a soundless scream and his face quickly turned bright red. She then grabbed him by his tail, swung him in the air a few times before slamming him into the ground. She turned around and threw Grif a couple feet ahead of her.
"Anytime now guys." Grif said weakly as Tex began walking towards him. "Guys?"
Tex grabbed Grif by his hind legs and threw him into the air, causing him to slam his head onto the ceiling of the ruins. As he fell back down she jumped in the air and kneed him in the balls.
"Guys." Grif wheezed as he crashed into the floor.
Tex grabbed Grif by the wing and threw him into one of the few remaining pillars, shattering it completely. Grif slowly started to get off the floor, but Tex lifted him by the throat and he began to choke.
"Y'know, this doesn't hurt as much as... I remember..."
"What?"
"Must be me being part tree and all." Grif said with a small smile.
Tex dropped him on the ground and huffed.
"Why'd you stop?" Church asked as he approached her.
"Fuck you." Grif grunted quietly.
"I guess hurting him just isn't as much fun if I can't... well... hurt him." Tex said sadly. "So what's the deal? Why the fuck am I a horse."
"Long story." Church grunted.
"I have time."
"I am afraid that time is the one thing we do not have." Delta said as he walked to Church's side.
"Delta?" Tex asked confusedly.
"Hello Allison. It is more or less good to see that your memory has returned to you. This will make the process much easier. Now I would suggest-"
"How is Delta still alive?" Tex asked. Her eyes shot open and she looked at the ground, memories from before flooding back to her. "How am I still alive?"
"The short version is Caboose died, we tried to bring him back, we succeeded, but then we brought the other AIs back with him."
"All of them?"
"Shouldn't the part you bring up the fact that we brought Caboose back to life?"
"That can wait. So all of them?"
"Epsilon got hit by a beam that was supposed to bring back those that were dead. Since it was supposed to bring back the dead when it struck Epsilon, it brought Gamma, Sigma, Omega, Theta, you and I back into the artificially living world. Now the others are still free and if we do not stop them soon they very well may harm the innocents of this world."
"We?"
"Yes, we are to-"
"At what point did I agree to any of this?"
"I'll let you hit Grif again." Church said coolly.
"Deal." Tex said as she bucked Grif in the chin.
"Ow, my chin." Grif said weakly before collapsing to the floor.
"Man it's good to be back." Tex said with a wicked smile.
"Is it safe to come in?" Simmons asked as he peered through the doorway.
"Are they all here?"
"Just the reds, Caboose, Tucker and me." Church sighed as he tapped Grif on the shoulder, causing him to slowly get back up.
"Well we kind of have another Andy." Simmons grunted.
"Yeah but he's a prick. Maybe even more so than Andy."
"More of a prick than Andy?" Tex asked with a raised brow. "Who is it?"
"Hello Tex!" Caboose said loudly, causing Tex to lose her train of thought. "How are you tonight?"
"Fine Caboose." Tex murmured as she watched Twilight enter the ruins. She narrowed her eyes and began to sneer. "You!"
"Allison." Twilight replied coldly.
"Don't you fucking dare call me that again or I swear I'll kill you this time." Tex snapped, t