“So... You want to hear a story, eh? One about ponies? Haha, have I got a story for you! Equestria... This is our home. But make no mistake - this is not a place of peace and love. It is a vast wasteland, filled with corruption, that only a fool would want to live here. Then perhaps I am a fool. But do not be fooled by what Equestria appears to be. There was a legend... Many people tell it. The legend of the Old Days. My father would always go on about The Ruins of Canterlot; even with his dying breath. Advanced Human technology, courtesy of the late Engineer Lyra Heartstrings. Infinite wealth. Fame. Power. Mares. So you can understand why some little foals who hear the stories grow up to become Ruin Raiders. Well, I have a story you may not believe. But I tell you it is true. The legend of the Ruins is real! And it is here on Equestia. And a... let's call her a 'guardian alicorn,' appeared to guide the Ruin Raiders to their prize. The tale begins right here on Equestria, with the brave Ruin Raiders, the guardian alicorn and most importantly, me...”
A lone bus drove down the road. A small skag wandered around, pinking at the grass, then bounded across the road, only to be immediately hit by the bus.
The driver of the bus, a pink mare with springy pink curls looked back at her passengers.
There was a purple one with a mask and a sniper rifle leaning by her, a big Red one with cloth wrapped around his front hooves, a Cyan one with a rainbow mane and multiple armor pieces strapped to her, and a yellow one with an SMG lying to her side. They were all fast asleep.
The town slowly came into view, and the driver started to talk loudly.
“All right back there, time to wake up! It's a beautiful day, full of opportunity!
Next stop: Fyrestone Depot. Time to gather up your stuff! Who's gettin' off the bus? You with the sniper rifle and the crazy mask? You look like a Appaloosa wrestler moonlighting as a dominatrix, mare. And you, soldier mare? Are those armor pieces from the Crimson Mane you're wearing? And what's your story, young mare? What can you do? Perhaps you can bake us all a wonderful cake, haha! I’ve baked plenty of cakes in my time, you should come over and help! And you, beefcake in the back... I'm not going to make fun of you. Your burps smell of blood, and you growl like a rabid manticore. Anyway... I've got some advice for all of you. It's tough out there, and you won't be able to just beat up on whatever you please until you're ready. Sure, you can take from the bandits or find things in the wild, but equipment you buy from my stores are guaranteed! And if you die, you can't get your money back because you're dead! I kid! No need to be so serious here. And if you're looking for the Ruins, well, you're going to have your work cut out for you. So don't be afraid to spend what it takes to get the equipment you need. You listen to Pinkie. I come from seven generations of merchants and I'm the best. Want to know why? Cause I'm making it out here, in this place!”
The bus came to a stop.
“Well, we're here. Don't worry about saying goodbye. I'm sure we'll be doing this all again soon enough. Haha... get off my bus.”
All of the four ponies left the bus one by one.
“Oh, and Remember! Life’s a Party!”
“Finally, we’re off that damn bus!” Rainbow Dash joyously yelled, flexing her wings and picking up her assault rifle.
“Eeyup,” Big Mac said, stomping his hooves into the dust a few times.
Twilight Sparke cocked her sniper. “Let’s not get to joyous just yet. We have to be ready for a lot of competition. I hear a lot of bandits roam this area.” Owylisus flew down and landed on her shoulder, his specially sharpened talons gleaming in the sunlight.
Fluttershy looked down at the ground as she slowly phased in and out of existence. She held a SMG, a crappy Lunar model, but she didn’t look like she ever planned on using it.
“Can’t we try and go about this in the least violent way as possible?”
“We didn’t come here not to be violent, Fluttershy!” Rainbow said, loading up her Celestian model assult rifle.
A small whirring noise startled the group. Looking behind them, they saw a small machine slide over to them.
“Oh great, a cloptrap,” Rainbow Dash groaned.
“Hello there! I am CL0P-TP, or Cloptrap! I am here to show you around our town of Fyrestone Depot!”
“Now we’re gonna have to listen to it yapping all the time,” Rainbow Dash said, rolling her eyes.
“Eeyup,” Big Mac said, giving the Cloptrap a pensive look.
“I think it’s cute!” Fluttershy went over to the Cloptrap and petted the top of its box body.
“Somepony thinks I’m cute? I’m flattered, really..” The Cloptrap went off into a long winded speech about how nopony loved him ever since he was built, and Fluttershy immediately regretted complimenting the small machine.
“Ah! Anyway, we should probably go over to the Doctor, he’ll know what to do with you all, and-”
The Cloptrap stopped after hearing the revving of engines.
“What was that?” asked Twilight.
“AH! BANDITS! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!” The cloptrap yelled, scurrying to hide under a trashcan.
A vehicle crashed over one of the gates, and, driven by two stallions wearing masks, parked near the four Ruin Raiders, and disembarked from their jeep.
Dashie readied her assault rifle, Big Mac lifted his front hooves and snorted, and Fluttershy squeaked and phased out of existence again.
Twilight readied her sniper, and Owylisus flew up into the air.
"Let's do this."