(A/N) I can see my story is generally liked...exceptional.
I awoke on the cold kitchen floor, staring at the ceiling fan. "I must have hit my head. This hurts...a lot. Jesus."
"What's a 'jesus'?" A voice asked me.
"Who the hell...?" I sat up and looked around. I couldn't see anything. "Where are you?"
"Over here, dumbflank." Only one person would say flank and have that much attitude, LYRA! I thought. "But there's no way..."
Something touched my shoulder and a voice talked from behind me. "Apparently there is a way." I shot into the air and onto my feet instantly. I turned around and officially decided that I hit my head...hard. Standing in front of me (I guess I wasn't hallucinating last time before I fainted) was Lyra Heartstrings.
Apparently Lyra thought I looked funny wide-eyed and mouth agape, because she fell on the floor laughing. "You should see your...your...your face! BAHAHAHAHA!!" I closed my mouth as my look shifted to one of extreme annoyance, until I started laughing too. I fell down right beside her.
We rolled around on the floor for about five minutes before I could get back to my senses. I stood back up and just kept looking at Lyra. "How did you even get here?" I asked her. She immediately stopped laughing as tears started to roll down her face.
Damnit. I gotta do something. "Hey, don't cry. It'll be alright. I'm sure I can help."
"Help me?" She said. "And how the hell are you gonna do that?" I cringed when she said that. You ponies can be mean can't you? I thought.
She noticed that and I could tell she didn't mean it personally, she was just sad. "I'm sorry, i'm just angry at the world right now?"
I decided to reply with a witty remark that would cheer her up...or I thought it would. "Which world?" She started sobbing again.
"Oops. I'm sorry. I didn't know."
"N-no." She said between sobs. "It's not your fault. I don't want to make anyone sad."
This is too much. I went over, knelt down on the floor, and put an arm around her. She turned her head and looked directly into my eyes. I stared into her and suddenly felt what she felt. I felt sadness, anger, and agony. She didn't belong here.
"What's your name?" I had to act like I had no idea of who she was. There was no way I would want to come across as a creeper, especially to Lyra.
"Dylan." I gave her a light smile to let her know that everything would be OK. "Are you hungry...Lyra?" (I am so full of shit.)
"I kinda already stole all of your carrots." She put on that same sheepish smile from earlier, trying not to make me angry. She didn't know that I was nowhere near angry. In fact, I thought it was awesome that that a pony from Equestria stole my carrots.
I put on my best Elmer Fudd voice. "Well den, you know what dis means wight?" She didn't understand the reference, but she giggled at how silly it sounded.
"What does it mean?" She asked, still giggling.
Lifting my finger and poking her in the belly, I said to her "It's Lywa season." She burst out into a fit of giggles, not crying at all anymore. I stood up and left her laughing there while I went and got a salad. I've been a vegetarian (other than fish, of course) for a few years, so that would probably make her feel better.
Her laughing eventually sub-sided and she appeared next to me, eyeing the bowl of fruits and veggies. "This isn't for you." I said, lifting the bowl out of her reach. She smirked as a golden light appeared around her horn. An aura also engulfed the bowl. It lifted the salad out of my hands and Lyra dumped the bowl in her mouth.
Well then...forgot about that. I thought.
"Thank you for the snack." Lyra said, trotting into the living room. I just chuckled and followed her.
"Sooo..." She said. "What is there to do around here."
"Wellll...there's this." I walked over to the T.V. and turned it on. "You can sit in that." I said, pointing at the couch. She shrugged and walked over to it. A confused Lyra was left standing on the couch, trying to figure out what to do.
I facepalmed. "You're supposed to sit in it."
"I knew that." She got in her trademark slouching/sitting position and it was all I could do not to 'squee' with joy. Lyra is sitting on my sofa watching...THE WALKING DEAD?! Shit! Not good! The Walking Dead was a show about zombies and survivors that was rather... involved with its gore scenes.
Thankfully, it was at part with drama, far from any emotionally scaring scenes. In fact, it was a very awkward scene to be watching with a female. Two survivors were discussing sex, so I ran over, grabbed the remote, and turned the channel to something else. The weather channel looked to be OK.
Lyra slowly turned her head towards me. "Why did you change the channel?"
"I now what sex is!" She shouted.
"OK....But can we please just get off that subject?" I was desperately trying to NOT have a conversation about this.
"Sure. What are we watching?"
"Looks like the weather channel....and a storm's on the way."
"Are there other ponies here?" Huh? Oh! She must think that the storm is being controlled by pegasi like in the show. Can't let her know that I know......
"Not that I am aware. Why do you ask?" Still had to act clueless.
"Well, I come from a place called Equestria. There, the pegasi control the clouds and weather. I am a unicorn, which means I can manipulate the magical energy around me to do as I please."
I sat there, mouth open. "That's a lot to take in. Interesting. Wait! I have something we can do." A sudden realization struck me as Lyra was surprised by the sudden outburst.
"Something called a video game."