“Begone!” Spike cried, jabbing the broom forward aggressively.
“Spikey-Wikey, you will put that broom down this instant!” Rarity stomped a hoof. “Starlight Glimmer needs our advice for her date!”
“No! Not after I had to rescue her from the awful advice you gave her last time. Leave this place and do not return!”
“Spike, you are acting MOST uncouth!”
“So it’s uncouth to want Starlight to succeed? BEGONE WITH YOU! ALL OF YOU!” Several more well-timed jabs of the broom forced Rarity, Twilight and Pinkie Pie out of the map room, allowing Spike to shut the door and jar it shut with the broom handle.
Spike turned around to see Fluttershy slowly crawling toward Starlight on her stomach. “That means you too, Fluttershy.”
Fluttershy looked up, timidly. “Oh, um, hi Spike. I was just going to give Starlight some tips on picking out a dress and doing her mane…”
Spike gave her a deadpan glare. “…They’re going to the carnival.”
“…Oh. Well, um, there’s no sense in not looking your best…right?”
“Fluttershy, I am asking you kindly to leave Starlight alone.”
Fluttershy looked down sheepishly. “Oh…Well, I mean, I think that it’s really really important that I talk to her too, Spike. I think it’s vital that she’s well prepared for her date, because we all want her to succeed, and-“
Spike took out a spray bottle and sprayed water on Fluttershy, who let out a timid ‘eep’ and cringed under the aerosolized assault.
“Go on, Fluttershy.” A few more strategic sprays, and Fluttershy had scampered out of the room.
“Wow,” Starlight finally spoke. “They were really aggressive… I can’t believe you sprayed Fluttershy.”
Spike took a deep breath and sighed. “Nopony likes spraying Fluttershy, but she gives you no choice. She doesn’t leave you with any options.”
Starlight looked down at Spike, suddenly unsure of herself. “Maybe we should have let them help…I mean, look at me, I’m a mess.”
Spike strode up to Starlight and took one of her hooves in his claws. “Starlight, you look radiant just as you are. You don’t need a dress to make you stand out at this carnival. It’s a romantic venue…Just be yourself and enjoy your time with him, and I promise everything will turn out alright.”
Starlight grinned widely and scooped him into a hug, giving him an extra-warm nuzzle on the cheek. “Oh, Spike! You know just what to say to make a mare happy!”
“Alright, alright,” Spike groaned, trying to wiggle out of her determined and affectionate grasp, “save it for Comet Tail, why don’t you?”
“Oh, that reminds me,” Starlight began, blushing. “W-what do I do at the end of the date? Should I kiss him? Or let him kiss me? Or is it too soon to be thinking about this? I mean, we sort of nuzzled after our last date, and-“
Spike made a calming shushing sound and held up a claw. “Starlight, you’re overthinking this. I think it’s important that you are affectionate to him…y’know, cuddle on the Ferris wheel and what not, since he’s probably more scared of you than you are of him…but when it comes to the end of the date, just go with your gut, and the moment, okay? I’m sure it will work out.” With that piece of advice, Spike turned tail and began walking out of the room. “Take some time to relax, I’ll let you know when he shows up,” he called without turning his head back.
“Wait!” she cried, holding out a hoof.
Spike turned around, raising an eyebrow. “Yes?”
“…The others are going to spy on me, aren’t they?”
“You betcha. Good luck with that. Let me know how it goes.”