//------------------------------//
// They All Look The Same To Me 
// Story: An Inkling Of Friendship 
// by Green Akers 
//------------------------------//

Day two of the ponies' trip to Inkopolis was much less eventful than the day before. With the balloon requiring minimal supervision and Brianna fully convinced that messing with the ponies was a bad idea, the ship's passengers were left with nothing to do but swap stories and watch clouds pass. The ponies regaled the Inklings with stories of their exploits against dragons and draconequuses and shapeshifting armies, making the Inklings' tales of Ink Battle glory seem bland and boring in comparison. 

"You mean you fought a magic-draining goat thing who stood taller than your castle, and you beat him?" Danielle exclaimed in amazement. 

Twilight nodded. "With the power of friendship and a little help from the Tree of Harmony, we defeated Tirek and sent him back to Tartarus where he belonged." 

Danielle sighed. "I guess that kind of makes my three vs. four win back at the skatepark sound pretty lame, huh?" 

"Pfft," Brianna remarked. "That didn't sound that impressive. I'll bet we'd have taken that thing down in half the time." 

"Oh really?" Rainbow Dash shot Brianna a cynical look. "And just how would you have done that?" 

"Simple," Brianna declared. "Distract him with a few Ink Mines, soften him up with our shooters, and them bam!" Brianna pounded her fist into her other hand. "Drop an Inkstrike on his sorry butt to finish him off. Easy-peasy." 

"I think you're vastly underestimating the strength of this Tirek creature," Tommy countered. "With the magical powers of four alicorn ponies, I don't think—" 

"Of course you would say that," Brianna snorted. "If I was as lousy a battler as you, I would think that beating that goat was impossible too." 

Tommy shook his head and opened his mouth to reply, but Twilight stopped him. "I've got a question for you, Brianna," she said. "Tommy says that most Inklings have never met an Octarian face-to-face, but Danielle mentioned that you have. What can you tell us about them?" 

Brianna shrugged. "What's there to say? Octarians are a lot like ponies: They're weird-looking, single-minded, and above all, thick as concrete. But..." She stood up from her chair, leaned across the table, and stared into Twilight's eyes. "There's one major difference," she stated coldly. "Octarians are bloodthirsty monsters who would as soon splat you as look at you. They don't give two seashells about friendship." 

Applejack rolled her eyes. "Neither do some Inklings we've met," she pointed out. 

"Tell me more," Twilight continued. "How did you encounter them? What was it like?" 

"So you want that story, huh?" Brianna sighed and sat back down. "Technically, what I'm about to tell you is classified information, and I'll deny the whole thing if anyone asks later, but I think it's in everyone's—sorry, everypony's best interest to know exactly who they're dealing with." She leaned back and put her hands behind her head. "It happened just last summer. I'd been tearing it up as a JIB for almost two years, and the big brass had finally let me go out on patrol..." 


 
"Hey, Captain Carpface!" A dirt-covered Brianna kicked open the captain's tent flap. "I want to lodge a complaint!" 

The captain looked up from behind his desk. "You have something to say, plankton?" 

"You're darn right I do!" Brianna took the shovel she was carrying and flung it at the captain, who didn't flinch as it whizzed by his head. "I am sick of peeling potatoes and digging ditches! I came out here to teach some Octarians a lesson, not do your company's dirty work!" 

"Is that so?" The captain leaned across his desk. "As a matter of fact, it just so happens that we've got a very important job for you." 

Brianna rolled her eyes. "Let me guess: It's laundry day." 

The captain chuckled. "Come with me, plankton." 

The captain led Brianna out of his tent and over to the edge of camp, where a large pile of boxes had been stacked nearly fifteen feet high. "You see these boxes, plankton?" the captain asked. 

"Yeah," Brianna remarked as she looked at the drawings of fruits and vegetables on the boxes. "You've got enough food here to feed the whole freaking city of Inkopolis." 

"Oh, it's not food," the captain revealed, his lips beginning to curl into a smile. "You see, these labels are just a disguise for the actual content. What's really in those boxes is..." The captain leaned over and whispered into Brianna's ear. "Weapons." 

"Weapons?" Brianna gave the captain a bemused look. "What, were you afraid we'd run out of Splattershots or something?" 

The captain shook his head. "These are special weapons," he continued. "Inkzookas, Killer Wails, Krakens... Even Inkstrikes." 

"That whole stack is special weapons!?" Brianna's eyes widened. "Holy crab, how many Octarians did you think we'd see on this patrol?" 

"When you're dealing with Octarians, plankton," the captain declared, "there is no such thing as too many weapons." He slapped Brianna on the back and pointed to a high ridge in the distance. "Here's the scoop: We're going to scout that ridge today, and we're going to need the whole company to do it." 

"Really?" Brianna raised her hands to the sky. "Finally! I'm going to—" 

"You're not part of the company, plankton," the captain reminded Brianna. "Your job is to stay behind and guard our camp against enemy intrusions." He patted a box labeled 'APPLES.' "Octarians are scavenging thieves, and they'll swipe these boxes no matter what they think is inside. I'm sure you can imagine what might happen if they got their slimy tentacles on these weapons." 

Brianna flinched as the image of a line of Inkzooka-carrying Octolings flashed through her mind. "Yes, sir." 

"This is a very important job, plankton," the captain said. "Believe me, if I could a spare a real soldier to do this, I would, but I can't." He knelt down and looked Brianna in the eye. "Can we count on you to defend our camp and keep these deadly weapons out of enemy hands?" 

Brianna grinned evilly. "They won't get a tentacle inside the perimeter, sir."



"You mean they left you to defend the entire camp by yourself?" Danielle reached down to pick her jaw up off the floor. "Wow! That's... That's..." 

"Incredible! Daring! Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!" Pinkie offered. 

"'Fishy' would be my word," Tommy said. "They took enough weaponry to start another Great Turf War out on patrol, and then left a single Junior Ink Battler to guard it while the entire company leaves camp?" He scrunched up his face. "Something doesn't add up here." 

Brianna glared at Tommy. "If you haven't noticed, Four-Eyes, I'm a heck of a lot better than the average—or in your case, below-average—JIB scrub. I could outrun, outshoot, and outmaneuver half of the 'real' soldiers in that patrol!" 

"I'm sure Brianna was fully capable of defending the camp by herself," Twilight interrupted. "Perhaps it will make more sense once we here the whole story. You were saying, Brianna?" 

"Well, eventually the company moved out and left me alone at the camp," Brianna explained. "The first few hours were pretty quiet, but I remained vigilant..." 


 
"ZZZZZZZZZ..." Brianna snored as she slept in the captain's chair, her feet up on the desk, and fought an imaginary Octarian army in her dreams. "Is that... All you've got?" she whispered between snores. "I've had... Substitute teachers... Who are... Scarier than you..." 

CRASH! The sound of wooden crates smashing on the ground startled Brianna, and she fell over backwards in her chair. "What the heck was that?" She grabbed her weapon and raced out of the tent. "Gyah!" she screamed as she saw the telltale trail of dark-purple ink that went right by the front of the tent. "Crab, they're already here!" 

Brianna quickly laid down a path of blue ink and raced over to where the weapons were stored. Her jaw dropped as she discovered that the carefully-stacked pyramid had been knocked over, and the boxes were now strewn all over the ground. "Son of a seahorse!" Brianna cursed. "The captain's gonna have my head when he sees—" 

A slight motion at the center of the mess made Brianna freeze, and she pointed her gun at a small pile of overturned boxes. "All right, you!" she shouted. "We've got you covered! Come out of there, nice and slow!" 

The boxes began to shake again, and a few small ripples appeared in the trail of purple ink that led to the pile. As Brianna trained her weapon on the ripples, a strange humanoid creature suddenly stood up from the ink and took a couple of shaky steps forward while holding its head in its hands. 

Brianna immediately recognized the creature from the stupid training films they had shown her at the JIB. The plethora of head tentacles, the Inkling-esque body, the metallic-yet-skimpy body armor, the large goggles... This thing was definitely an Octoling. She judged the creature to be a young female, perhaps even the same age as Brianna herself, and gaging from its movements, it had gotten knocked for a loop by the avalanche of boxes. "Freeze!" Brianna shouted. "Put your hands up!" 

The sight of Brianna—more specifically, of Brianna's gun—made the Octoling jump back, and it immediately put up its hands and started speaking rapidly to Brianna in its native tongue. Great, Brianna thought to herself. Apparently I should have signed up for those dumb Octolese classes at school after all.

Brianna suddenly noticed that one of the Octoling's hands was not empty. "What's in your hand?" the Inkling demanded, taking an aggressive step forward as she spoke. "Drop it right now!" 

The Octoling responded with a stream of faster, higher-pitched gibberish, but did not comply. "Ugh," Brianna grumbled. "I said drop what's in your hand! YOUR HAND! Your... You know, this thing!" She pointed her gun at her own hand to demonstrate. 

The Octoling stopped, looked at its hand, and finally dropped what it was holding. "Now kick it over here!" Brianna continued, miming a kicking motion. The Octoling copied this motion, but didn't kick the item. "Argh! No, kick that over here, you idiot!" Brianna shouted, pointing to communicate her wishes. 

Eventually, the Octoling got the message and booted the item over to Brianna, giving the Inkling a good look as the ink-and-dirt-covered object. "Is that... Cauliflower?" Brianna gagged, and booted the vegetable back over to the Octoling. "Yuck! You can keep that." 

The Octoling dropped to its knees, clasped its hands together, and continued blubbering nonsense at Brianna, bringing the Inkling back to the question at hand: Now what? The boxes were toppled, but nothing appeared to be missing or damaged. The Octoling did not appear to be armed, and certainly wasn't putting up a struggle, so... What should she do with it? 

Splat that stale sucker! a voice in Brianna's head shouted. Make an example of it, and let those Octojerks know just who they're messing with! 

Consider the bigger picture, a second voice chimed in. Sure, splatting this thing would be satisfying, but what if has information about other Octarians in the area? A simple capture like this could clear this entire area of Octoling scum! 

The latter argument appealed to Brianna, and she decided to take the Octoling hostage for now. "All right you, march!" she ordered, gesturing towards the center of camp. 

The Octoling gulped and complied with the request, slowly walking across the camp with Brianna right behind her. "Now... Where the heck am I gonna put you?" Brianna asked. "I know! I'll tie you up in the captain's chair! Gosh, the look on his face when he sees you will be—" 

Brianna froze as she caught a glimpse of a sniper's laser sight aiming just over her left shoulder, and she dove to the ground just before she heard the crack of the rifle. She quickly rolled over and looked back to see a new trail of purple ink that ended right where she had been standing. 

Right on cue, four Octolings burst into the open, each one carrying a Splattershot-like weapon rather than a cauliflower. "It's an ambush!" Brianna screamed, and she raised her weapon and began unloading her ink tank in the direction of the invaders. 

Brianna and the Octolings traded fire for several tense seconds before the Octolings stopped and took cover behind a nearby tent. "Okay," Brianna wheezed to herself, her pulse racing and her gun still raised. "You're okay, Bree. There's just a few of them, and they shoot like C-rankers, so just keep them pinned down and back away—Yah!" She yelped as a red dot appeared on her forehead, and leaped out of the way just before another sniper fired. 

Brianna quickly rose to her feet and scurried behind another tent. "Okay," she tried again. "They've just got a few snipers backing them up. You can run, swim, and shoot circles around every last one of these things, so just—" 

Suddenly, Brianna felt a shot strike her square in the back, and sharp waves of pain began radiating through her body. She bit her lip to keep from screaming, and turned to see five more Octolings charging towards her from the rear, accompanied by several fat, barely-evolved Octobombers hovering around with bizarre propeller helmets. Her eyes nearly popped out of her head as she noted the kelp braided into the head tentacles of two of the charging Octolings, branding them as some of the top soldiers in the Octarian army. Brianna gulped as the severity of the situation dawned on her: This was a real fight, and she was in real trouble. 

"Gotta get out, gotta get out, gotta get out..." Brianna began repeating to herself, and she aimed in an Octarian-free direction and created a small path of blue ink that she could use to escape. Her weapon's range was limited, however, and she could only swim a short distance before popping back out of the ink and extending her escape route while dodging enemy fire. 

A minute and a half of frantic movement led Brianna back to the toppled tower of boxes, and she took cover underneath the haphazard pile. The spot wasn't perfect, and she knew her ink trail would lead them right to her, but it was the best she could do on short notice, and she figured anything coming after her would have to get through her gun first. 

She pressed her back against one of the boxes, took a deep breath, and tried to come up with an exit strategy. Getting splatted wasn't usually the end of the world, but that was because she usually had a respawn point around to bail her out when it happened. How far back was the last point we passed? she wondered. Maybe six miles? Eight? That thing looked really old—it'll never work for a splat this far away! Even if there was a closer point to collect her post-splat Brianna bits, it was likely under Octarian control and tuned to their particular shade of purple, and thus would ignore her non-purple remains.

If the patrol's still close, maybe I can super-jump out of here, she thought. She reached into her pocket for her phone and its "map app" to locate nearby teammates, but discovered her pockets were empty, and she cursed herself as she recalled setting the phone down on the captain's table before she napped.

Brianna swallowed hard and looked down at the special gage on her weapon. Her special weapon was charged, but it wouldn't be enough to keep a force this size at bay. Then again, she thought, maybe a whole tower-full of specials might... She quickly turned and pried open the box nearest to her, but found that the 'ORANGES' label on this particular box wasn't lying. "Just my luck," Brianna grumbled as she reached for another box. "A smorgasbord of artillery, and I'm stuck hiding in the decoy boxes." 

And then she heard it: The familiar clank of a Splat Bomb as it fell through a small hole between the boxes above her and landed on the ground. As she turned to look, the bomb began flashing and—



"STOP!" Fluttershy squealed, her face buried in Rarity's coat and her hooves in her ears. "Please! I don't want to hear any more!" 

"M-m-me neither," Danielle admitted, grabbing the table to keep her hands from shaking. 

"That's cool," Brianna said with a shrug. "There was only one word left in the story anyway: Boom." 

"But you must have gotten out of that fix somehow," Rarity pointed out. "How else would you be here to tell this story?" 

"I got lucky," Brianna said. "The company had taken control of a respawn point just a half-mile outside of camp. When I showed up at their feet and told them what happened, the captain said he'd seen that trick a thousand times: One Octoling goes in as a decoy, the rest converge once they figure they've got an opening, and not an Inkling is left standing. He decided to retaliate by going back and carpet-bombing the whole camp with Inkstrikes." Brianna chuckled. "Boy, you should have seen those Octosuckers scatter when those missiles started falling! I'll be we sent thirty or forty of those jerks back home the hard way." 

Twilight's expression didn't change. "So... That's your experience with Octarians?" 

"Yep." Brianna confirmed. "I found out firsthand how little Octarians think about others, and managed to live to tell the tale. You'll find out too, if you're dumb enough to engage them." 

"Maybe," Twilight offered. "But I have one last question for you: If the roles were reversed, and an Octarian was holding, say, Danielle hostage, would you have left any of them standing?" 

"Of course not," Brianna spat. "Why?" 

"Just checking." Twilight gave Applejack a knowing wink. 

"I've got a question," Rainbow Dash interrupted. "What's that big tall thing out there by that cloud?" 

"Huh?" The Inklings turned around and looked at the horizon behind them. "Which cloud?" Brianna asked. "There are, like, twenty of them of them out there, and they all look the same to me." 

Rainbow rolled her eyes. "The second stratus right of the sun! There's some tall green pointy thingy sticking through it." 

Tommy grabbed his gun and aimed it at the cloud in question, but Danielle snatched the gun away and pressed the scope to her face. "That's... That's Inkopolis Tower!" she finally shouted, a big smile appearing on her face. "We did it, guys! We're home! YAHOO!" Danielle dropped the gun, grabbed Tommy, and began swinging him around in celebration.

"Sweet, dude," Craig offered, calmly ducking intermittently as Danielle swung Tommy over his head. "I knew we'd make it." 

Brianna picked up Tommy's rifle and examined the sight for herself. "Well, well... So we did." She smirked at Twilight. "I guess we're about to find out which one of us is right, eh?" 

Twilight smiled. "I'm looking forward to it."