//------------------------------//
// The One Where Pinkie Pie Knows 
// Story: Responses To A Disgruntled Friendship Student 
// by keaton-furman-prower 
//------------------------------//

Dear Cadance:

You mean... you could be my mommy?

YES!!! I ACCEPT!!!

Your new daughter, Scootaloo.





Dear Fax Machine:

That was Action Comics #1. Supermane's first comic. The single most sought after comic in the world. And you burned it.

When I am done with you, there won't be enough to identify you as a dragon. Or, for that matter, as anything that was ever alive.

Very angrily, Shining Armor.

P.S.: What I do with my Sailor Moon comics is none of your business.





Dear Fax Machine:

Though you may have fucked up Shining Armor's comic book, you still have a chance of redeeming yourself. I want my brother delivered to my bedroom tonight. Preferably bound so he won't try to escape. After that I want you to keep Cadance occupied so I won't be bothered. Try helping her with that chicken she decided to adopt.

Do not fuck up my night, or I will make you wish you never came out of that egg.

Sincerely, Twilight Sparkle.





Dear Shining Armor and Cadance:

I just heard the news! Congratulations! I hope your baby will be a beautiful little bundle of joy!

So... may I be the godfather?

Sincerely, Discord.





Dear Cadance:

Congratulations! I can already tell that your foal will be a big bundle of joy!

So, seeing as I am undoubtedly going to be the godmother, I'd be happy to teach your child everything I know. Wouldn't that be great?

Your loving aunt, Celestia.





Dear Cadance:

Since I'm the only pony qualified to be the godmother, I obviously deserve certain... privileges.

Basically, your husband has to spend some "fun time" with me.

You can start next week. Don't worry about tonight, I already have plans.

Your favorite sister-in-law, Twilight Sparkle.





Dear Luna:

Would you like to be the godmother? You're the only pony I can trust.

Sincerely, Cadance.

P.S.: Please help me rescue my husband. His crazy sister is holding him hostage and has her Fax Machine as a guard.