//------------------------------//
// Chapter 5: Discord's Plot 
// Story: Knickerbockers Below The Knee 
// by Masterweaver 
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	Meanwhile in Canterlot, nothing much was happening.

Well, okay, there was the usual political shenaniganery, shopkeepers keeping shop, about twenty-seven ponies in the middle of intimate physical activity, three couples having break-ups of varying emotional intensity, two murders, one near murder, forty-four tourists wandering through the streets, and one colt did just discover something in the attic of his house that would change his way of thinking forever and lead to a societal revolution in the coming years, but that wasn't important at all.

The reason it wasn't important was simple: Discord didn't know about any of it.

Which was why he was lying on his thinking tree, bored out of his skull. Where he'd gotten a dragon's skull was probably a question best not answered, but at the very least he'd stopped making that awful noise a few seconds ago and was now just drooping out of the new hole.

'well well well, if it isn't mister chaos and disharmony.' Fate floated down and rested on the dragon's horn, stretching her legs. 'going for literal metaphor again?'

"Oh, you know me, I love to make ponies eat their words." Discord snapped his claws; a passing pegasus decided his newspaper would make an excellent mid-afternoon snack. "So many of their metaphors are contextual and nonsensical, it's one of the things I have always liked about them."

'kind of childish though. i mean it's another one of your obvious gags, discord, anybody can see it coming.'

"Well, I suppose I've always been a child at heart." Discord opened his chest, pulling out a foal. "Hey, Button, what's up?"

"Oh, I'm just about to fight the dungeon boss." The foal paused his hoofheld game and glanced around. "Also, apparently I'm in Canterlot now. Oh, and literally speaking right now there are clouds, a sun, and a pegasus halfway through eating a newspaper."

"Clever kid, you are."

"Yeah, mom would freak out if I just disappeared. Mind sending me back home?"

"Of course, of course." Discord snapped his fingers, and the foal was once again in Ponyville.

Fate snorted as he scooped up the beanie and put it on his own head. 'heh, i've always been a fan of exact words. he's going to be right ticked when he realizes you still have his electromathingy.'

"Do you know, he actually invented and patented this device?" Discord waved the handheld gaming device around. "Quite a genius, when he applies himself." He considered the object in his hands... then snapped his fingers with a sigh.

'...you sent it back to him?' Fate leaned closer. 'you?! wow, i guess you have changed.'

"Destruction can cause chaos in the short term." Discord stretched his arms wide. "But over the long term, I've found that creation will introduce so many things... admittedly, it requires a tad more patience then I had in the old days."

'hence the dragon skull.'

"Hence the dragon skull."

Fate tapped her cheek for a moment. '...weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeell... i really shouldn't tell you this...'

Discord's ear pricked up.

'see, blueblood--he's a local prince, and a bit of a schnozz.' Fate streched her arms out. 'thing is, since he's a prince, he can almost always get the attention of the mares, you know? so tonight, he has a date.'

"Really?"

'yep.' She shot him a sly smirk. 'and another date. and another, and another, and another...'

Discord matched Fate's growing grin. "Oh dear, that sounds.... troublesome."

'yep. thing is, i can't decide if i should have him running between all five dates, or arrange for the five mares to meet each other. i mean, it's all at the same time, in the same establishment, but--'

"You know, it's possible he'll just fake illness to avoid this scenario," Discord pointed out. "If he's got a lick of sense, that is."

Fate deflated. 'well... crud, i was looking forward to this.'

"But if, say, a handsome and devilishly charming spirit of chaos were to come to him," Discord continued, "and offer to, oh I don't know, multiply the bodies he had at the moment, he could juggle all five dates with ease."

'....reeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaally.'

"Oh yes. Of course, there would be some side effects," Discord pointed out. "Since his mind was split among five bodies, each one would have a different aspect of his psyche. But you know, he doesn't need to know that."

'no, you're right. he doesn't. after all, he never asked.'

"Absolutely right, my dear!" Discord stood on the nose of his dragon skull. "Shall we implement this cunning plan?"

'weeeeeeell,' Fate mused, 'it's a serious violation of my duties and powers with the potential of emotionally scarring all involved all for the sake of my own twisted amusment... why the hell not?!'

"Tartarus, dear. It's Tartarus here."

'semantics.' Fate levitated into the air. 'oh, speaking of which, didn't you deal with that guy from tartarus recently, the red one?'

Discord winced as he flew after her. "Yeeeeeeees, but I'd really rather not talk about him. He was... well, he was definitively worse than I was, if you must know, and yes I am counting the old days."

'still, that pony princess got a magic castle out of the bargain.' Fate grinned. 'i'm surprised you're still allowed out after all that.'

"There were calls for my head," Discord admitted, "but Celestia managed to get most of them to stop."

'really? how?'

"Well, she asked for a reasonable punishment that could actually be implemented." He shrugged. "After some incredible negotiation, she pointed out that I had been in stone since before Tartarus, so now I only have to spend my weekends doing community service."

Fate rolled her eyes. 'such a rules lawyer.'

"Hmm, well she's at least a nice one."

'i guess...'

"So, aside from Blueblood, what's new with you?"

'oh, not much, not much. just came from ponyville, actually. that rainbow pegasus and the farm mare are dating now.'

"....Huh." Discord considered that for a moment. "Well.... good for them, I guess."